24 Pester House Clerk About Ancestors " U S^~PMY^ WASHINGTON— Sir John Courts, Bart, K. C. M. G...K. O. C., C. 8., who, as plain Jnmea C.' Courts serVes the United States government in thfe responsible position of clerk of thq House committee on appropriations, has his troubles just lijte other folks. People are all the time pestering him' to death to know if it Was his grand: father or his great-grandfather or his great-great-grandfather who used to own about 20,000 acres in Maryand and who presided over the feudal glo ries of Clean Drinking Manor. Ahd every time he gets through with one of these historic bugs and settles down to work a delegation of home folks from Tennessee drops in on him and demands to know why he accept ed from the Emperor of Korea —be- fore that eminent personage was sat upon by the Japanese—the military order of the Setting Moon, third class and wears the undress button that goes with it all the time. But even these annoying things pale into insignificance beside an incident that happened just the other day. Mr. Courts has his nose in a chaotic appro priation bill and was dictating to four Old General Got No Aid from His Aide GEN. Luke E. Wright, told at a din ner in Washington a war story from Manila. "There was once upon a time," he began, "a gallant old general. This general, leading a splendid charge in his'youth, got a bullet in his chest and two sabre cuts across the head. In after life, relating over the nuts and svine his many battles, it was this particular charge that he always de cribed most flamboyantly. "The older the general grew the ■more splendid the charge became; the more awful was the slaughter that he visited upon the enemy; the more horrible were the wounds that he re ceived. For corroboration he would : always turn to a grizzled veteran on ' his. left, his aide-de-camp. The aide de-camp would nod his gray head in acquiescence silently. "Taller and taller grew the gen eral's stories of the charge. Higher Plans Homegoing of Irishmen in 1910 i Cf FIFTEEN years ago Francis J. Kil kenny arrived in this country from reland. He was so green that he uistook a Fourth of July celebratioh is a reception to himself. Young Kil kenny had relatives and friends in Vlilwaukee and Chicago and he made 'or the middle west soon after his •anding. He had a fund of native wit tnd an abundance of energy and jluck. He got a job cutting grass and oon came under the notice of Charles . Dawes. When Mr. Dawes came to ./ashington as controller of the cur •ency he brought Kilkenny along as lis private secretary. When Dawes 'etired from the controllership his successor found he couldn't get along without Kilkenny. Mr. ltidgely was succeeded as controller by Lawrence 3. Murray and that official has re tained Kilkenny who has now be come one of the institutions of the treasury department. Vo'ung Kilkenny is making remark able headway with a movement for the "home-going" of Irishmen in 1910. Chautauqua Salute, Menace to Health '"■//A Diiy'l WILLIAM C. WOODWARD, •hlfipHh officer of the District of ytflih;i>)ia, is in favor of abolishing the only rorm of athletics ,W nrul Kraduat.es •(rfiaii* 1 tjaftfjpra literature and reading circle. that the Chautauqua salute is 4 tirenftce to health. The salute, as all ltmw;>is a waving of ho handkerchief vphealtfriends make a the tec? ture platform or sail aw,iy for; distant lands. Lverybody waves and every body Is happy provided that one does adding machines all at once when a straight-backed, straight-nosed, white mustached, white-haired and extreme ly dignified old gentleman marched in to the committee room. He was look ing for his member and as the mem ber wasn't on hand, had turned around togo out again, when he caught sight of Mr. Courts. " . There was a moment of tenseness and of pauso-™a -hiatus in"oth,er words. And theq thy old gentleman, advanced and cast ttf'mself— cast —on My. Counts' bosooi, clutched Mr v Cdurt.6' hand, patted tyx. Courts' shoulder _arf& gazed into* Mr. Cfiurts' ey£s;""(And' as a dozen or so members " of if tHe^Appropriations committee gath erW'aro'ujid • the old gentleman ex- > plodod/'hiS,. bomb. • ' "Captaih,' 8 hie said to Mr. Cburts. "I am moah than happy to meet you again. ,thls' the happiest day of my life, my' dear c^njrade,in arms. XtelLl i. xi&Ußfnber the days when, side by side, knee to knee, we followed the fortunes of that flower of chivalry, that most dashing of cav alry leaders, our idolized chieftain, Gen. J. E. B. Stuart." Of course it was a case of mistaken identity. Sir John says so himself. But nevertheless it was embarrassing. And he's going to ask for a couple of more assistants, for, with this Clean Drinking Manor story and the Setting Moon button and the Confederate cav alry yarn, he's just fairly pestered to death and hasn't time to do his reg- . ular work. and higher grew the mound of ene mies slain by his sword. More and more numerous became the bullets, thrusts and slashes sustained by him self. At the end he always appealed to the grizzled aid; and in silence the aid nodded confirmation. "The general one night gave a large dinner party. The wine was no less abundant than superb, and at dessert the old warrior let himself out upon the charge as he had never heretofore done. Four horses were killed under him. Three lances passed through his right arm, five through his left, Nine sabres crashed down upon his head simultaneously. The bodies of his slain formed a wall wellnigh im passable about him. And it seemed that there was hardly a muscle in his person wherein a bullet failed to im bed itself. " 'You remember all this, don't you, De Courcey?' he said, in conclusion. "The silent and long suffering aid at last spoke up. " 'No, general,' he shouted, in a loud, indignant voice. 'No, of course I don't remember it. How can you expect me to? You know as well as I do that the cannon ball that killed your fourth horse struck the breastplate of a cuirassier behind us and then bounded back and took my head off!'" The plan is to induce the Irish people from all over the United States to re turn to their native land during the months of July, August and Septem ber. It is proposed that the various Irish organizations, notably the A. O. H., and the Gaelic league shall take up the moveilient and carry it through. Kilkenny does not claim personal originality for the idea but he gave it initial impetus and has ta ken upon himself the burden of inter esting Irish societies in the plan. More than a sentimental purpose animates those who have undertaken this ambitious task. While the pros pect of a visit to the old country, at reduced transportation rates, and in the glory of midsummer, will form a leading incentive, the real purpose of the movement is to stimulate Irish industry. Kilkenny has made several visits to his old home in Ireland and each time has been impressed with the industrial possibilities of the coun try and the apparent hopelessness of improving conditions without organ ized effort. He takes the position that the industrial and agricultural re sources of Ireland have not been de veloped to of their capac ity. Capital is needed to develop them and Kilkenny believes thai, it will bo forthcoming if the Irish people in this country are given an opportun ity to see with their own eyes that profitable investments can be made. .not overtax his or her energy. "The custom of waving a handker chief vigorously in the air," says Dr. Woodward, "is dangerous. Nearly ev ery contagious disease can be com municated in this manner, if the hand-- kerchief is slightly soiled. If the lin en square has just been purchased, or has come straight from the laundry, there is not the slightest danger, but • the waving of a handkerchief that has been used even once is harmful. "When a handkerchief is wavf,.! the jvijid blows the germs from it. Ty phoid fever, scarlet feVer, tuberculos is, smallpox and c.hiekenpox. measles, and diphtheria may bo thus spread." The Chautauqua saluters criticised the health officer's remarks. Woodward does not know whit he hi -talking about," said a young wo than, "We never carry Boiled hr.cc! i | Kerchiefs." CAMERON COUNTY 1 PRESS, THURSDAY, DECEMBER Itf, 11 The Littlest Boy. J; and Santa Claus ij > • * Edwin L. Sabin ji | j (Copyright.) I • J HE GREAT hall clock, sta tioned opposite the foot of the stairs, two. From his bod the Littlest ' Boy listened • with a sense of awe. Never before had he heard it strike so late an hour. Once, indeed, he had heard it strike ten, but usually it had stjruck eijrht and when next- he was -awake striking-sijc and morning had cd#kte^; The LittleM. Boy lay > find listflnfid. The house' was"ihipressiyely still;- only audible were the stjitety ticking. ; 6f the monitor elock bfeJeW, and tife regular .breathing of the Big gest Boy and -the Biggefcjt Girl ttip froom adjoining. The Littlest-Boy's eyes were \y|d

- i He wondered if Santa Claus > had come yet. Hefore the grate-fire, dowh in the library, were ranged three chairs; a rocking-chair for the Biggest Giri, a straight-backed, ordinary chair for the Biggest Boy, and a huge, roomy arm-chair for himself. In addition, he had hung up his stockings to the mantel. He tried to picture to himself how, if Santa Claus had been and gone, that chair and those stockings must "Hello!" Said Santa Claus. look. At intervals, as some particu larly alluring fancy stood out before him, he gave an ecstatic wriggle ajnd a few blinks extra. Oh, the red wagon! And the silver napkin-ring! Supposing he got them both! It did not seem to him pos sible that he could exist without eith er, and yet—and yet—he mustn't ex act too much. If he might take one peep into the library—just one tiny peep—to find out whether or not Santa Claus had been. He felt that He ought not to yield to this temptation; and he sighed hard and twisted. But even in the lfiidst of his struggle he did yield, for first his disobedient right foot stole from beneath the blue coverlet, and next his disobedient left foot; and in a moment all of him, enveloped in his long, pink-flannel night-gown, was moving resolutely towards the door way. £ • At the landing the stairs turned sharply. The Littlest Boy also turned with them to continue his journey. Now there ahead of him was the mon itor clock, staring him in the face, and ticking loud reproval. From, the library, off the hall, came the reminis cent glow of the grate-fire with Which the Christmas eve had been cele brated. Down sped the Littlest Hoy, boldly ignoring the astonished clock, down the remaining flight, and across the square hall, whose rugs were soft and comforting. On the threshold of the library he stopped short, frightened at what he had done. He had caught Santa Claus! •••*• Aye, there was Santa Claus, bend ing over the big chair, which;,) the Littlest Boy glimpsed, was overflow ing with packages and things. j! • I do not know but that the ij'uifo't Boy would have beat courteous ' te treat (although, of course, his farther curiosity was simply tremendous)' had not Santa Claus suddenly glanced Up arid descried 'him —a small, pinjc 'lim ine, made sti'.l pinker by the giving coals, framed, wide-eyed, in the littery, doorcase. "Hello!" said Santa Claus, not'ftiftiip li»g. ' • "Hello!" responded the Littlest«Jlby.t "1 didn't know you -vere here." • Didn't, you?" remarked Janta crawled, in ragged but unmistakable : :1 lines,: j j£| "for the kid "J; '1; "SANTY CLAWS." , \