HIS REAL WOE
"Why so glum, old man? Won't she
return your love?"
"No. But the worst of it is she
won't return the presents I gave her!"
Feeding Farm Hands.
Every farmer's wife knows what tre
mendous appetites farm hands usually
have; but while they eat well they
work well, too.
Here's a good suggestion about feed
ing farm hands. Give them plenty
of Quaker Oats. A big dish of
Quaker Oats porridge with sugar and
cream or milk is the greatest break
fast in the world for a man who needs
vigor and strength fof a long day's
work. The man that eats Quaker Oats
plentifully and often is the man who
does good work without excessive fa
tigue. There is a sustaining quality
in Quaker Oats not found in other
foods, and for economy it is at the
Jiead of the list. Besides the regular
size packages Quaker Oats is packed
in large size family packages, with
and without china. 6
Would Find Use for It.
After a day and a night spent in an
swering telephone calls from people
who wanted the latest news from
Peary and Dr. Cook, the secretary of
one of the arctic clubs had retired
for a well-earned rest, when the per
sistent 'phone bell rang again. A voice
at the other end said:
"Do you want the ambulance sent
right over?"
"What ambulance?" roared the hate
secretary.
"Why, the one you sent for."
"I sent for no ambulance."
"You lie!"
The secretary gasped, then he
screamed into the 'phone:
"Send it as soon as possible, and
you come over, too, and I'll send you
back in it!"
On a Time Limitation.
In spite of the reputation for latitu
dinarianism he gained from his early
trial for heresy, the late Prof. Jowett
of Oxford was intolerant of preten
tiousness and shallow conceit. One
self-satisfied undergraduate met the
master one day. "Master," he said, "I
have searched everywhere in all phil
osophies, ancient and modern, and no
where do I find the evidence of a
God." "Mr. ," replied the master,
after a shorter pause than usual, "if
you don't find a God by five o'clock
this afternoon you must leave this
college."
Come Home, Mother.
Mother, dear mother, come home
from the club, and rustle some sup
per for me; 'tis time you were here
working over the grub and getting
things ready for tea. The table's not
set nor the teakettle boiled, the vege
tables are not prepared; no wonder
my temper and feelings are roiled,
though 'tis doubtful, indeed, if you
cared. Come home, come home, come
ho-ho-home! Yes, cut your symposium
down a wee bit, dear mother, and
hustle right home! —Los Angeles Ex
press.
A Work of Supererogation.
Henry dislikes being bathed and
argues with his mother over every
square inch of his four-year-old anat
omy.
One night, when his patience was
especially tried by what he consid
ered wholly unnecessary work, he
exclaimed:
"Oh, mamma, couldn't you skip my
stomach? Nobody ever sees my stom
ach!"— Judge's Library.
Though we should examine the
whole world we shall not find one
man so happy as to have nothing left
to wish for.—Oliver Goldsmith.
CHILDREN SHOWED IT
Effect of Their Warm Drink In th»
Morning.
A year ago I was a wreck from
coffee drinking and was on the point
of giving up my position in the schoo*
room because of nervousness.
"I was telling a friend about it and
she said, 'We drink nothing at meal
time but Postum, and it is such a
comfort to have something we can
enjoy drinking with the children.'
"I was astonished that she would
allow ihe children to drink any kind of
offee, but she said Postum was the
lost healthful drink in the world for
hildren as well as for older ones, and
hat the condition of both the children
nd adults shou'ed that to be a fact.
"My first trial was a failure. The
;ook boiled it four or five minutes and
it tasted so ilat that I was in despair
but determined to give it one more
trial. This time we followed the direc
ions and boiled it fifteen minutes aft
•r the boiling began. It was a decided
success and I was completely won by
its rich delicious flavour. In a short
time I noticed a decided improvement
in my condition and kept growing bet
ter month after month, until now I am
perfectly healthy, and do my work
in the school room with ease and pleas
jre. i would not return to the nerve
lestroying regular coffee for any
money."
Read the famous little "Health Clas
sic," "The Road to Wellville," in pkgs,
' '•'"here's a Reason."
Ev« rend the nb«rr lolt«( A new
DIM' <l|i(,earx from time to time. They
■re p.<-QL>lO<*, true, and full of Jiurupa
Interest.
p(0)f (llhejtosttess I
Cfe&t on Topics of by & j
Au£fo©H*y |
«_- ■ =—====*=*. O
An Animal Party.
This clever animal party may be
utilized for guests either old or young.
It is also adaptable for the needs of
church societies, which are always in
search of schemes to break the mo
notony, especially at the very com
mencement of an evening affair.
As each person enters a slip of pa
per containing the name of an animal
is to be pinned upon his back and he
Is told he must guess from the conver
sation of those around him what ani
mal he Is supposed to represent. Then
pass booklets ornamented with cute
little "Teddy" bears and pencils. On a
door have a poster of the animals go
ing two by two into the ark and the
words, "This Way to the Greatest
Show on Earth." Admit the guests
In groups to this room, where the
cages containing the animals will be
found, allowing ten minutes for each
group to guess what the cages con
tain. Here is a list of animals which
may be added to by individual
hostesses: "Kid" (a glove of kid),
"Lynx" (links of a chain), "Rat" hair
rat), "Monkey" (letters M O N and a
door key), "Chamois (a piece of
chamois), "Lion" (a doll's pillow,
"Goat" (a small piece of butter), "Pea
cock" (a dric'd pea and a toy rooster),
"Hear" (a tiny undressed doll),
"Eagle,"(the letter E and a picture of
a sea gull).
The cages (boxes crossed with wire)
were numbered, and the guests wrote
down what they supposed the animal
was in the booklet opposite a corre
sponding number. Animal candy boxes
are good for prizes. Then .have a
contest to see who can come the near
est pinning a goat's whiskers on in
the proper place, the contestant to be
blindfolded.
Serve an ice, "animal" cookies and
barley sugar animals.
Japanese Fan-Tan.
At a Japanese affair this delectable
concoction was served. I give the
recipe as it cause to me feeling sure
it will be very welcome, as many
calls for just such a dish come to the
department.
To make l'an-tan, cook half cupful of
well-washed rice in a pint of milk un
til very soft. Stir in a heaping table
spoonful of sugar and one well-beaten
egg and remove at once from the fire.
Mix in a half cupful of assorted
candied fruits, cherries, apricots and
pine apple, and turn into a shallow,
well-übttered pan to cool. When firm
cut into strips about an inch and a
half wide and three inches long; dip
in egg and breadcrumbs and brown
delicately on both sides in butter.
Drain, dust with powdered sugar and
eerve hot.
Announcing an Engagement.
The hostess had asked eight girls
to luncheon and no one expected the
interesting news that was announced
Paris M
THE WALKING costume at the left is of old blue cloth. The back and
sides of the upper part of the costume simulate a sort of Jacket orna
mented along the edge with buttons of the material. These button*
also ornament the long front which fastens on one side.
The turn-over collar, the wide revers and the cuffs are all faced with
black liberty, of which the girdle is also made. The latter is knotted in tha
back with long sash ends.
To this upper pa?t the lower part is moulted with plaits forming a
deep flounce. The cravat and sleeve ruffles are of lace.
The evening gown at the right is of crepe do chin® trimmed with a
beautiful metal and jet embroidery.
The upper part is in princess or cuirass style, and to thla the lower
part ig gathered. Tha bertha aD'J little puffed sleeves are of niousselln# d«
Boie ~ _
CAMERON COUNTY PRESS, THURSDAY, OCTOBER 14, 1909.
In this fashion: The centerpiece was
a low mound-shaped form of whiU
roses known as "bride," and there wai
a delicate fringe around them of maid
en-hair ferns and mignonette. Ovei
this from the chandelier swung a
cluster of white wedding bells; they
were tied with fluffy tulle streamers
The place cards wera little standing
cards of a bride and bridegroom cut
out, and it did not take long to dis
cover that the faces were photographs
of the young woman, who was soon
discovered to be the honored guest,
and the lucky man, who it was discov
ered, was to lead her to the altar. This
menu was served: Chilled canteloup,
cream of spinach soup, fillets of fresh
fish fried in olive oil, with sauce tar
tare; creamed sweetbreads, green
peas in timbals, finger rolls, fruit sal
ad, with cheese and bar-le-duc, pine
apple sherbet, small cakes, coffee.
A Good Guessing Contest.
The answers to each question are
words ending in 'age."
What is the age of a ship? Voyage.
What is the age of a pocket-book?
Coinage.
What is the most musical age?
Bandage.
What age is necessary for a soldier?
Courage.
What is a railroad's age? Mileage.
What the earliest age to express?
Package.
What age is always ahead? Cab
bage.
What's Uncle Sam's age? Postage.
What age does the ostrich attain?
Plumage.
What age do single people never
reach? Marriage.
What age does a lady prefer? Man
age.
What's the best age for a horse?
Carriage.
What is said to be a mean age?
Damage.
What age should a king have?
Homage.
What age is always before us?
Dotage.
MADAME MERRI.
EksKKSng®
• •
Green belts are stylish.
Grays are to be fashionable.
Never has lace been so universally
used.
Old red is a prime favorite with
black.
Yellow is more to be seen than for
years.
Fall tones are generally soft, dull
and faded.
Small buttons are more used than
large ones.
Pockets in motoring coats and ul
sters are huge.
Close fitting styles will conlinm
through the winter.
A NURSE'S EXPERIENCE.
Backache, Pains in the Kidneys, Bloat
ing, Etc., Overcome.
A nurse is expected to know what
to do for common ailments, and worn-
en who suffer back
fSl *"*»' ache, constant lan
guor, and other com
mon symptoms of
kidney complaint,
should be grateful to
% Mrs. Minnie Turner,
Map.Ru> °' b * st -* Ana "
darko, e Okla., for
' pointing out the way
to find quick relief. Mrs. Turner used
Doan's Kidney Pills for a run down con
dition, backache, pains in the sides and
kfdneys, bloated limbs, etc. "The way
they have built me up is simply mar
velous," says Mrs. Turner, who is a
nurse. "My health improved rapidly.
Five boxes did so much for me 1 am
tailing everybody about it."
Remember the name—Doan's. Sold
by all dealers. GO cents a box. Foster-
Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
THE DANGER SIGNAL
"Yes, Freddy, I'm a sick man!"
"Wot's der matter?"
"Why, I'm gettin' that restless an'
wakeful, dat I can't sleep, only at
night!"
CHILD ATE CUTICURA
OINTMENT.
Spread Whole Box of It on Cracker*
—Not the Least Injury Resulted.
CuticuraThus Proven Pure and Sweet.
A New York friend of Cuticura
writes:
"My three year old son and heir,
after being put to bed on a trip across
the Atlantic, investigated the state
room and located a box of praham
crackers and a box of Cuticura Oint
ment. When a search was made for
the box, it was found empty and the
kid admitted that he had eaten the
contents of the entire box spread on
the crackers. It cured him of a bad
cold and I don't know what else."
No more conclusive evidence could
be offered that every ingredient of Cu
ticura Ointment is absolutely pure,
Bweet and harmless. If it may be
6afely eaten by a young child, none but
the most beneficial results can be ex
pected to attend its application to even
the tenderest skin or youngest infant.
Potter Urutf A Chum. Corp., Solo I'ropa., Uobton.
Poker Finance.
Mose Coonley (a winner) —Guess I'll
cash in, boys.
Abe IMokeby (also to the good)
Guess I'll do de same.
Jefferson Yallerby—Me too!"
Bill Bingy (the banker, a big loser)
—Well, I guess yo' each done got an
uddeh guess a-comin', gen'lemen!
Ownin* to dis heah attempted an' un
called-fo' run on de bank, de instertoo
tion am now suspended an' won't re
sume oppyrations till de panicky feel
in' hah fully subsided an' de foolish
depositahs continues doin' business as
fobmahly. And it's youah deal, Mose
Coonley!"—lllustrated Sunday Maga
zine.
Beware of Ointments for Catarrh
that Contain Mercury,
as mercury will surely destroy the sense of smell
and completely derange the whole system »vhen
entering it through the mucous surfaces. Such
articles should never be used except on prescrip
tions from reputable physicians, as the damage they
will do is ten fold to the good you can possibly de
rive from them. Hall's Catarrh Cure, manufactured
by F. J. Cheney A Co., Toledo, 0.. contains no mer
cury. and la taken Internally, acting directly upon
the blood and mucous surfaces of the system. In
buying Hall's Catarrh Cure be sure you get the
genuine. It is taken Internally and made In TolecUfc
Ohio, by F. J. Cheney A Co. Testimonials free.
Bold by Druggists. Trice, 75c. per bottle.
Take Hall's Family rills lor constipation.
The Thirst for Gore.
Unsophisticated Onlooker —I think
this is a flrst rate place. See what a
fine view we have of this car coming.
Seasoned Spectator—Fine view fid
dlesticks! Nothing ever happens on
these straight stretches —not even a
broken leg. Come on down to the
turn and wait for the fun. —Puck.
Beginning Hostilities.
Mr. Perkly—Oh, if you could only
learn to cook as my first wife did!
Mrs. Perkly—lf you were as smart
as my dear first husband was you'd
be rich enough to hire the best cook
in the land.
Of Some Benefit.
Barber —Did the bottle of hair re
storer I sold you do any good?
Customer—Yes, indeed; it kept me
from wasting my money on any more.
-Every time a mariied woman begins
to talk about her rights it's her hus
band's cue to enumerate a lew of his
wrongs.
There are $15,000,000 worth of but
tons made in this country every year,
ypt lots of men use nails to connect
their suspenders with their trousers.
ifo matter how long your neck may be
cc now sore your throat, Hamlins Wizard
Oil will cure it surely and quickly. it
drives out all soreness and inflammation.
Gossip has a thousand tongues—and
they all work overtime.
PUTNAM FADELESS DYES
THE DIAGNOSIS
"Anything really serious with my
eye, Doc?"
"No, no—simply a pig sty."
And He Suffered.
Little Willie, suffering from an at
tack of toothache, had paid his first
visit to the dentist, accompanied by
his mother. Father, on his return
from the office that evening, was nat
urally much interested.
"Didn't it hurt?" asked father.
"Sure, it hurt," replied Willie.
"Weren't you scared when the dent
ist put you in that big chair and
started all those zizz-zizz-zizz things?"
"Oh, not so much."
"That was a brave boy. But, surely,
you suffered?"
"Of course I suffered. But I just
kept repeating over and over the
golden text we had in Sunday school
last Sunday."
"The golden text? What was it?"
"Why,' Suffer little children to come
unto me,'" replied Willie, glibly. "I
kept saying that over and over to my
self, and the first thing I knew it didn't
hurt any more."
Ours and Theirs.
"A play on names unconsciously per
petrated by my youngest son was
very funny," said a Flatbush man the
other day. "We live next door to a
family named Feitenour, and the other
night while my family was busy read
ing in the library we heard a racket
on the back porch.. My son went out
to investigate, and 011 his return my
wife, always inquisitive, asked what
had caused the noise.
" 'Nothin' but a couple of cats,' Jim
told her, and then I heard her ask:
'Did you see whose they were?'
"'Yes; one was ours and the other
was Feitenour's.'"
Weakened by Alcohol.
Dr. Bertillon, the eminent French vi
tal statistician, has shown that tuber
culosis is twice as prevalent among
the retail liquor dealers of France as
among other shopkeepers. He at
tributes it to the fact that the alcohol
which they handle and use all day
long weakens their bodies and thus
renders them more susceptible to the
disease germ.
Physicians Everywhere Use Resinol
With Very Great and Unvarying
Success.
During the last six months I have
prescribed Resinol in numerous cases
of acute and chronic skin diseases and
chronic ulcerations with very great
and unvarying success. It is a reli
able preparation, and its action is
prompt and pleasing.
A. F. Volkman, Baltimore, Md.
Repartee in the Bright Family.
"The newspapers are making a
great stir about men's disinclination
to marry," remarked Mrs. Bright.
"The Bible says there are no mar
riages in heaven," commented Mr. B.
"And what has that to do with us?"
Bright laughed.
"Perhaps they are figuring on hav
ing a little heaven on earth."
The Minority Position,
"Saw Peleg down to the public li
brary yistiddy. He wuz reading all
the old newspapers he could find."
"Yes; he can't remember for sure
whether the Panama canal is to be
sea level or lock, and whichever it is
he's agin it."
The Grouchy Man.
She —There's Mrs. Toozle. She seems
quite reconciled to the death of her
first husband.
He —Yes; but I'm afraid that her
second never will be."—lllustrated
Bits.
The 800-foot bridge over the Yellow
river at L,anchowfu, in the province of
Kansu, is nearing completion. All ma
terials had to be conveyed nearly
1,000 miles in Chinese carts.
You can't tell by the size of the
gravestone how big the man was who
lies in the grave.
Mrs. VVlnslow's Soothing Syrnp.
For children teething, softuna tlio gums, reduces In
llamtnation, allays pain, cures wind colic. 25c a bottle.
Some men never do anything on
time except quit work.
COLT DISTEMPER
bo Sidled very easily. The sick are cured, and all others la
Ka* '3>MwiWMWIkMPie stably, no matter how "ex posed," kept from having the dls-
l t ' atie i y ÜB ' n fif BPOHN'B LIQUID DISTEMPER CUIiR Give on
\W < «lii^ lll< In feed. Acts on the blood and ex pels germs of
>KFJ allTormsof distemper. Bent remedy ever known for mares In foaL
' Y r jyß3&3n , Onebottle guaranteed to cure one case. 60e a bottle; sr. and
jflflMKli I * lO doeenofdrugKlsta and barnen dealers, or sent expretajmld by
/ nian, rf»cturerß. Cut ihpwa how to poultlee throats. Our fre®
ft-iTtfi fjj* * i It""Wlet pfl yes every tiling. I>ocal agents wanted. Largest etlllm*
bore© remedy in existence—twelve years.
6POHN MEDICAL CO.. CkemlatswidßaeterlologUts, Goshen, lnd. 112 U. 8. A«
HER
PHYSICIAN
ADVISED
Taking Lydia E. Pinkham's
Vegetable Compound
Columbus, Ohio.— "I have taken
Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Com-
pound during
change of life. My
doctor told me it
was good, and since
taking it I feel so
much better that I
can do all my work
again. I thin k
Lydia E. Pinkluim'a
Vegetable Com
pound a fine remedy
for all woman's
troubles, and I
never forget to tell
my friends what it< has done for me."
—Mrs. E. IIANSON, 304 E ;st Long St.,
Columbus, Ohio.
Another Woman Helped.
Graniteville, Yt. " I was passing
through the Change of LI fe and suffered
from nervousness and other annoying
symptoms. LydiaE. Pinkham's Vege
table Compound restored myhealthand
strength, and proved worth mountains
of gold to me. For the sake of other
suffering women I am willing you
should publish my letter." M
CHARLES BARCLAY, R.F.D., Granite
ville, Vt.
Women who are passing through this
critical period or who are suffering
from any of those distressing ills pe
culiar to their sex should not lose sight
of the fact that for thirty years Lydia
E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound,
which is made from roots and herbs,
has been the standard remedy for
female ills. In almost every commu
nity you will find women who yhave
been restored to health by Lydia E.
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound.
[IB PENNIES LlHi
10 MEN TD
MAKE $32,034.01
Poo tho fortunes made with Stvsngo
Invention* Of this sum Korstad (Far
mer) mado 92,21 U. 13 In M weehnt Zim
merman (Farmer) $3,856 In 3D riayst
Btonemnn (Artißt)92 f 4Bl.tfHln 60 days.
No wonder, Gashman eays:—**A man v. ho
can't sell your goo da, couldn't Bell bread
In a famine." JJut listen I Hasp (A rent)
mado sl*<hisln dujri) .Vuefl (Clerk)
Ovlatt(Minister) fcI.OUO; Cook
(Solicitor) 04,000) Staffers (Surveyor)
Hoard (Doctor) |S.SOO( Hart
a* £U,O00« This wonderful oppor
tunityherotoforoenjoyed by only
L2/IT : I> Ta limited number now open to all
Hurrahl Hand rods already get-
rich. Tdei can too, why not.
M Experience don't matter.,Ai leu's
wPjgigaggr jßaih Apparatus gives every home
1' bathroom for 95* •Thinkof it^
Could anything bo more popular?
irrosiHtiblo. Reese saw 60
Pv?writes LET I'B
STAHT YOU fis a sent,
sales man, manager, ca.«»h or
■ credit plan, all or spare time.
Cantlon~-Th!s ad. wwn't appear again. Territory
going fast. ltlslr 1 cent now«a postal—for free
book,proofs, and remarkablo offer.
THE ALLEN MFG. CO., 1503 Allen Bldg, Toledo, 0.
your ni."—Agt. A. 1., of y,o.
PROSPER COLONY
COMPANY
V/VSIVII fa! I 1 tatlon, gooU bculth
AND THE BEST FIVE ACRES OF LAND
IN FLORIDA FOR SIOO.OO
Located between Orlando and Kisslmmee on
the main lineof the Atlantic Coast Line Hail
way, in the heart of the orange, grape fruit
and vegetable region of Florida.
Terms, ten dollars cash, and nine monthly
payments of SIO.OO each, for each farm pur
chased. When more than one farm is pur
chased, they will be adjoiuing.
Taft, the Colony town, is located on the
rail way, eipht miles south of Orlando. Every
purchaser of two five-acre farms is given a lot
in Taft, sixty by one hundred and twenty feet.
ltemit to the Orlando Bank Trust Company, Or
lando, Florida, ten dollars for each farm you wish to
purchase. The Cashier will mail you contract, and
when payments are complete, will moll you warranty
deed. When two farms are purchased, one lot in
Taft is Included In yonr contract. Wo use the Bank
to protect your interests. Address
PROSPER COLONY COMPANY, Orlando, Fla.
Work While
You Sleep
Millions of people have CAS
CARETS do Health work for
them. If you have never tried
this great health maker —Get a 10c
box —and you will never use any
other bowel medicine. SJJ
CASCARETS IOC a box for ft week's
treatment, all druggists. Biggest seller
in the world. Million boxes a month.
wa§eLijF.Sf PROMPT R RE T LVFF OP
ASTHMA & HAY FEVER
SOUR. DRUGGIST FOR.it
WW! FOR rati SMU NCTTMfiOP A LVHAN CO MFIALO. MIL
LIVE STOCK AND ri COTDATVDCC
MISCELLANEOUS CLCIf I ItU I I "CO
In jjrent variety for sale at the lowest nrleps by
WKHTKKX SEWSeATKK I NIOJi, Ss4W.Adam. HI., thlcafs
H IVPIIVA WntHiin IC.t'olomfin.Wnsh.
W* AI B I Ington, D.C\ Hooks free. HlKh>
■ « I ■!« I West referenoes. Bern result*
W. N. U., CLEVELAND, NO. 41 -1909.
7