O you intend to
become an essay
l\\ ist, gentle writer?
\ \ \ Then learn the art
I 1 A of apt anil appo
* I 1 \| 1 site quotation.
V I 4 1 Quotations are
(Ik \ I 1 I not more desir
\ B 1
ft broker than they
iV A should be to you.
Cultivate Bartlett.
7 111 To plant in the
t ,are sands of an
jjwT? . _ ' P a 1 imagination
<< the borrowed
flowers of the
\ successful garden
\ ers literature
M J} is to prepare a
>i \i parterre »iat
>) shall please even
I the critical. For
*• when a man not
variously learned
comes on a passage that he has him
self read in the original setting, his
vanity is tickled.
Tickle your reader's vanity often
enough, and he is yours and will
sound your praises. "A nightingale
dies for shame if another bird sines
better," but you who are not a nightin
gale might die for shame if it were
not for the singing of that large cho
rus of English birds that make your
songs possible. "Homer himself must
beg if he wants means," and if Homer
begs, who are you that says,"to beg
I am ashamed?" See only that you beg
at the right gates, and you shall en
joy a borrowed richness that in the
minds of many passes for a home
made garment of great value.
"Some books are to be tasted, oth
ers to be swallowed," and others
quoted. "Reading maketh a full man,"
J~% -O_
I,- tS> i-Jk
Lv Wo ™ e s'keformers
/111 1 I ir Op/e *Read
Old Llm Jucklin put aside his news
paper, arose, stood on the hearth, and
remarked to his wife, who sat in a
rocking chair, half dreamily knitting:
"They must hire folks by the year to
do nothin' else but to write about
women."
"They want to furnish the men
somethin' to read," his wife replied.
"Furnish the men somethin' to skip
so's to read somethin' else," said the
old man. "Once in a while I read 'em
though, and I've just read a lot of
stuff that 1 know wan't written by
anybody, man or woman, that had
anything else to do —a whole column
and a half tellin' how to raise chil
dren; and I'll bet a steer it was writ
ten by an old maid."
"Limuel, what are you talkin'
about?"
"An old maid, I said; and one of
the sort that snatches up her skirts
and runs like a turkey hen whenever
she sees a child a comin' toward her.
Oh, I know their brand."
"Yes, I suppose so," said his wife.
"But a woman that a raisin' children
hasn't got time to write, and one that
has them already raised is so tired
she dr- feel like it."
"Oh. I expected to get it, one way
or another," replied the old man."lt
was due and I deserved it. But it
does seem that the writers on the sub
ject of women ought to stumble on
somethin' new. But man has been
studvin' women—now, let me see.
Well, particularly ever since Sam
son's wife cut his hair off, and
he hasn't stumbled on anything new
yet. I've given her a good deal of my
time and I'm ready to make my ac
knowledgments. I've summed up my
account book. Two and two make
four anywhere else. But with woman
two and two sometimes make six.
You can't tell. Figgers don't lie, but
with her they are mighty accomnio
datin'. And, Lord bless her, she lias
finally discovered that man Is her
enemy. The old maids have told her
so and she has begun to believe it.
Over here across the creek the other
day a party of 'em had a meetin' and
resolved that man was a tyrant and
ought to tie oustpd. Old Miss Patsy
Page, that has chased every chance to
get married that she could find
through a spyglass a comin' her way.
was the president. She called atten
tion to the number of divorces
throughout the country, and she
sighed over all this waste of raw ma
terial. She read a paper, too, on how
to manage a husband. Bet she'd like
to read a book on how to catch one."
"Limuel, she's a good woman. She
sets up with the sick."
"Yes, and when she does the well
folks catch it. She'd sour a mornin's
milk by lookin' tha cow in the eye."
"Well," replied the old lady, "she
•ays that you used to come to see her,
not only that, but "oirt of the fullness
of the heart the mouth speaketh,"
and he who has read much and re
membered much can write well.
"Discretion of speech is more than
eloquence," and the most discreet
man is the man who knows where to
borrow to advantage. There be those
who write original essays of which the
best that may be said is, "It is his
own." Better far the essay that glit
| ters and sparkles with a thousand
| gems filched from the world's great
! lapidaries.
"Brevity is the soul of wit," but it
! does not follow that every postal card
I contains an epigram. The safest way
lo insure wit in your essay is to pick
i it where you find it.and ten chances
j to one that will not be in your own
| brain. Better the wit of others than
: no wit at all —which might be a prov
| erb, but is not.
| Shakespeare has well said: "There
■ is nothing either good or bad, but
1 thinking makes it so." If this but
! applied to your essay, O writer! what
jan excellent thing it would be! But it
! lies not within your gray matter to
compass it. Again, with the bard,
| you say, "I must become a borrower,"
1 and you walk down the pleasant gar
dens, plucking here and there a flow
er of fancy until your little essay
stuns the eye with color. "Here's
richness!"
Nothing that you can say but has
been well said before: therefore quote
it, fusing it, if you will, with your poor
thought to crystallize it and make
it seem a new thing.
A sixteenth-century writer says:
"They lard their lean books with the
fat of others' works." There you
have an old precedent, so fear not.
You are in good company. You do
but take what others have taken be
fore. Quote you never so well, you
and she has hinted that she could
have had you."
"Ha, if I'd married her she would
have had me —you can bet a settin' of
eggs 011 that."
"It was the talk of the neighborhood
how you used togo to dances with
her."
"Yes, it was the talk of the neigh
borhood whenever anybody went with
her at all. Gad, she had a tongue that
would pick out a briar. And now she
is a reformer, an uplifter of downtrod
women. Well, she spent akiut two
thirds of her life tryin* to tread 'em
down. I can recollect when every girl
in the neighborhood was afraid of her.
An old gypsy came along one time and
had some love powders for sale, and
Miss Patsy she bought some and man
aged to give 'em to Zeb Collins. She
must have given him about half a
pound from the way he acted. Went
out and hung over the back fence
and called hogs for ten minutes, he
did. After awhile when he was silent
she looked out after him and ho was
a ketchin' of his horse. We called him
Bakin'-Powder Zeb after that. But he
didn't rise."
"I don't believe she gave him the
powders."
"No, just loaned 'em to him. At any
rate, he got 'em. And now you trace
back some of the biggest of these
women reformers and you'll find love
powders in their lives somewhere.
There ain't not'nin' on the earih bright
er than a bright woman —and there's
nobody the Lord ought to shower His
favors down on more than her No
matter how good a man is he can't
begin to ketch up with her. She is
tenderness, love, truth, religion—all
in one. But when she's pizenous—
look out. That is the time for Satan
himself to dodge. And I'll bet. every
time he sees old Miss Patsy comin'
he takes to his flinty heels. When a
man's disappointed with life he gen
erally tries to keep it to himself. But
with a woman—she not only wants it
to be known, but wants to make oth
ers dissatisfied."
"Yes," said Mrs. Jucklin, "for when
a man's a failure it's his own fault. A
woman coulii never have helped her
self."
"You've got me again and I'll have
to get out the best way I can. Yes,
the cause of failure lies with the one
that has failed, it was a lack of
energy,'a lack of jedgment—a lack of
somethin'. A man must make circum
stances, but sometimes circumstances
won't be made. Under the law all men
may be born free, but they ain't born
equal. Neither minds nor constitutions
are on a par with one another in dif
ferent men. Man acknowledges this
and quietly knocks under, takin' hold
of the next best thing and doin' with
it what he can. I'm talkin' about
sensible man. But the woman—of the
Miss Patsy stride —she does her best
CAMERON COUNTY PRESS, THURSDAY, JULY 30, 1908.
do but requote, and It may be that
he f/om whom you quote lifted hia
thought from a richer than he. It la
well said that "a dwarf, standing on
the shoulders of a giant, may see fur
ther than the giant himself," and If he
can see further it stands to reason
that he can be seen further. Your
borrowed plumes will make you a
marked man; that is, one who is
"read, marked, learned, and inwardly
digested."
"We can say nothing but what hath
been said." Why attempt the impos
sible, then? "I would help others out
of a fellow-feeling:" I have been
thought-dry myself. I dare say that
there were mornings when John Mil
ton said: "I had rather than 40 shil
lings I had never begun 'Paradise
Lost.' I have keyed It so high that
it splits my throat to sing it."
"Angling is somewhat like poetry—
men are to be born so." So angle that
ye obtain the prize. Fish in other
men's streams and a full basket will
surely reward your perseverance. And
when you have spread your wares in
the market place, not one in ten will
care who owned the fish originally.
You will receive the credit even if
you pepper your work all over with
quotation marks.
Emerson says:"The passages of
Shakespeare that we most prize were
never quoted until this century." Do
you not see that it was not what
Shakespeare himself said that men
valued? It was not until his jewels
flashed in other men's bosoms that
we perceived their luster. Therefore
quote, for in so doing you will be ren
dering the bard a service.
"It is hard for an empty bag to
stand upright," but thanks to your
incursions into the fields of literature,
your bag is full. Let it stand.
(Copyright, by James Pott & Co.)
and then tries to get ev«n by doin' her
worst. She looks for happiness in tha
misery of others. In a sorrowful coun
tenance she finds the reward of her ef
forts. She holds man accountable for
the fact that she was born a female.
The dog that barks at the moon sees
somethin', but the woman that rails
against nature sees nothin' but her
self. I know that some of the women
folks would like to shoot me for sayin'
it, but I do say that the mother of a
child is greater than the woman that
makes a speech five columns long and
has the whole community talkin' about
how smart she is."
"How about the father of a child?
Isn't he greater than the man that
makes a speech?"
"He may be. About as no account
a man as I ever came across could
make a speech for the clouds, I tell
you. But when he got through he was
just a seashell that the musical wind
had been blowin' into. That was all.
He never had the joy of carin' for a
little human bein'. He was jest a
feller that folks could call great be
cause he could talk. We may not have
a mission on this earth, but if we have
it is to obey the lovin' instincts of na
ture. The man that hates and the
woman that has no love in her heart
are both the enemies of nature. You
may say that old Miss Patsy would
have loved if the opportunity had been
Klven to her. She would have married,
that's true enough; but I don't believe
she, nor any of her ilk, ever had any
real love in her heart. I'm not standin*
here talkin' up for man. Bless you,
he's hopeless. He's gone all the gaits.
But the best of us have loved and
honored our women. We haven't called
them the enemies of man simply be
cause nature set a limit to our minde
and —because fate, or whatever you
may call It, showed us our weakness.
We've played some cards and have
drunk a good deal of liquor, but the
best of us have reformed and we hope
the Lord has forgiven us."
"Oh, of course," said the old lady,
"any man is willing enough to ask the
Lord to forgive him when he knows
that it is nearly time for him to die.
During all the time, night after night,
while these dear little ones thtt he
thought so much of have been growing
up, he has been off at elections and
other things; sod when he gets old
enough to quit then he talks about the
mission of nature and all that sort of
stuff. If man doesn't want women to
go around makin' speeches why
doesn't he marry her and take care of
her? If he thinks that marriage is so
beautiful for a woman why doesn't he
prove that it is beautiful for him?
Summing up my book, as y6u summed
up yours, why doesn't a man learn
earlier how to behave himself?"
"Well, I reckon you've got me
again," said the old man.
(Copyright, by Opie Read.)
BED-BOUND FOR MONTHS. I
Hope Abandoned After Physicians'
Consultation.
Mrs. Enos Shearer, Yew and Wash
ington Sts., Centralia, Wash., says:
t"For years I was
weak and run down,
could not sleep, my
limbs swelled and
the secretions were
troublesome; pains
were intense. I was
fast In bed for four
months. Three doc
tors said there was
no cure for me, and I was given up
to die. Being urged, I used Doan's
Kidney Pills. Soon I was better, and
in a few weeks was about the house,
well and strong again."
Sold by all dealers. 50 cents a box,
Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. Y.
WAS ONLY RED BLOOD.
And Three-Year-Old Had Been Told
That it Was Blue.
Three-year-old Allan had a very aris
tocratic grandma, who prided herself
on her own and her husband's blue
blooded ancestry. She told him heroic
deeds of them and warned him from
ever playing with boys of low degree.
One day Allan came screaming up
stairs to his mamma and grandma,
holding his hand up covered with
blood, where he had cut his little
finger. They were both greatly
alarmed, as he was a child who rarely
cried or complained when hurt. Mam
ma washed the blood off and, exam
ining the cut, said:
"Why, dear, it's not so very bad.
Does it hurt you so much?"
"I'm not cryin' 'cause it hurts," he
said, "but 'cause it's only red blood,
and grandma said I had blue." —Phila-
delphia Ledger.
CHANCE FOR EMMA.
Tommy (to his sister) —Emma, if
you give me a bit of your cake, I'll
spoil the piano so that you won't be
able to take a lesson for a fortnight!
Swadeshi.
In the sense in which Sir William
Harcourt remarked "We are all social
ists now," it may be said that all An
glo-Indians are believers in Swadeshi
While all reasonable Anglo-Indians dep
recate the senseless agitation and
the unsound economics of the extrem
ist advocates of Swadeshi principles,
they are all anxious to assist that
natural development of indigenous in
dustries and the creation of new ones
upon which the future prosperity of
the country so largely depends.—Pio
neer Mail.
A Difficult Lesson.
"It is next to impossible for a man
to teach a pretty girl how to whistle,"
said a musician who is a good whis
tier.
"How is that?" he was asked.
"Well, providing she is not your
wife or sister, when a pretty girl gets
her lips properly puckered she usually
iooks so bewitehingly templing that he
kisses her, and the consequence is she
doesn't have a chance to blow a note."
DROPPED COFFEE
Doctor Gains 20 Pounds on Postum.
A physician of Wash., D. C., says of
his coffee experience:
"For years 1 suffered with periodical
headaches which grew more frequent
until they became almost constant. So
severe were they that sometimes I was
almost frantic. I was sallow, consti
pated, irritable, sleepless; my mem
ory was poor, I trembled and my
thoughts were often confused.
"My wife, in her wisdom, believed
coffee was responsible for these ills
and urged me to drop it. I tried many
times to do so, but was its slave.
"Finally Wife bought a package of
Postum, and persuaded me to try it, but
she made it same as ordinary coffee
and I was disgusted with the taste.
(I make this emphatic because I fear
many others have had the same expe
rience.) She was distressed at her
failure and we carefully read the di
rections, made it right, boiled it full
15 minutes after boiling commenced,
and with good cream and sugar, I
liked it —it invigorated and seemed to
nourish me.
"This was about a year ago. Now I
have no headaches, am not sallow,
sleeplessness and irritability are gone,
my brain clear and my head steady.
I have gained 20 lbs. and feel I am a
new man.
"I do not hesitate to give Postum
due credit. Of course dropping coffee
was the main thing, but I had dropped
it before, using chocolate, cocoa and
other things to no purpose.
"Postum not only seemed to act as
an invigorant, but as an article of
nourishment, giving me the needed
phosphates and albumens. This is no
imaginary tale. It can be substanti
ated by my wife and her sister, who
both changed to Postum and are
hearty women of about 70.
"I write this for the information and
encouragement of others, and with a
feeling of gratitude to the inventor of
Postum."
Name given by Postum Co., Battle
Creek, Mich. Read "The Road to Well
ville," in pkgs. "There's a Reason."
Ever read the above letter? A new
one appears from time to time. They
are genuine, true, and full of human
Interest.
SAVED FROM MATERNAL WRATH, j
Boy»' Fervent Prayer Was Answered
in the Nick of Time.
A suburbanite Is fond of telling this
story of his five-year-old son Bobby.
Being of an inquiring turn of mind
the youngster one day managed to
turn on both faucets in the bathtub
to see what would happen. It chanced
that the stopper was in place, and the
tub rapidly filled up, to the great de
light of Bobby. Finally, however, the
tub became so full that it threatened
to overflow onto the floor, and Bobby,
having a proper respect for the mater
nal slipper, became frightened and
tried vainly to turn off the water. B«-
ing unable to, for some reason, he
gazed tearfully at the ever-rising flood,
and then, mindful both of his religious
training and the occasional visits of
the plumber, he plunged down on his
knees, and his elder sister, who hap
pened to be passing at the moment,
heard him exclaim, fervently:
"O, Lord, please stop this water
running! And, O, Lord, If you can't
do it, please send somebody that can!"
His prayer was answered, for his
sister rose to the occasion and turned
off the water and temporarily saved
Bobby from the much-feared slipper.
ITCHING HUMOR ON BOY
His Hands Were a Solid Mass, and
Disease Spread All Over Body
—Cured in 4 Days By Cuticura.
"One day-we noticed that our little
boy was all broken out with itching
sores. We first noticed it on his little
hands. His hands were not as bad
then, and we didn't think anything
serious would result. But the next day
we heard of the Cuticura Remedies
being so good for itching sores. By
this time the disease had spread all
over his body, and his hands were
nothing but a solid mass of this itch
ing disease. I purchased a box of Cuti
cura Soap and one box of Cuticura
Ointment, and that night I took the
Cuticura Soap and lukewarm water
and washed him well. Then I dried
him and took the Cuticura Ointment
and anointed him with it. I did this
every evening and in four nights he
was entirely cured. Mrs. Frank Don
ahue, 208 Fremont St., Kokomo, Ind.,
Sept 16, 1907.'*
MORE USED TO SELLING PINS.
Absent-Minded Clerk (who has been
transferred from notion department)
—So. you'll take this piano. Shall I
send it, or will you take it with you?
The Vital Point.
Judge Gillette was cne of the most
dignified of old-fashioned jurists. One
day he was holding court at a county
seat in a rather out-of-the-main-road
county, when a violent hubbub in the
hallway interrupted proceedings in the
court-room. After quieting the dis
turbance, the sheriff returned to report
to the judge. "It was two men fight
ing," explained the official. "Danny
Flannigan and Jake Jenkins, tough
! characters about town. I have put
them under arrest." And he waited,
J expecting that the magistrate would
order both offenders to be brought in
to his presence and committed for con
tempt.
What was the sheriffs astonishment,
therefore, when the judge beckoned
him to the desk, and bending down,
said in a confidential whisper:
"Which licked?"—lllustrated Sun
i day Magazine.
Making It Sure.
The lawyer was drawing up En
peck's will.
"I hereby bequeath all my property
to my wife," dictated Enpeck. "Got
that down?"
"Yes," answered the attorney.
"On condition," continued Enpeck,
j "that she marries within a year."
"But why that condition?" asked the
1 man of law.
"Because," answered the meek and
lowly testator, "I want somebody to
be sorry that I died. See?"
HftUtucil
Constipation
May be permanently ov ercomety proper
persona! efforts witK tKc assistance
j of the one truly beneficial laxative
remedy, Syrup ojligs am! Kl'uir of Senna,
which enables one regular
habits daily So that assistance to na
ture may be gradually dispensed with
when r.o Longer needed as the best of
remedies, when required, are to assist
nature and not to supplant the natur
al functions, vhich must defend ulti
mately upon proper nourishment,
proper efforts,and rifht living generally.
To get its bene|iiciai cjjecfs, always
buy the genuine
ixir a /SennA
Fig Syrup Co. only
SOLD BY ALL LEADING DRUGGISTS
out toe only, regular price SCf p«r Bottle
ONE ON THE DOCTOR.
6t. Peter't Query Decided Reflection
on Medical Attendant.
Dr. Arthur T. Holbrook told a story
on his profession.
"A man by the name of Evans died,"
ho said, "and went to heaven, of
course. When he arrived at the pearly
gates he said to St. Peter:
" 'Well, I'm here.'
"St. Peter looked at him and asked
his name. 'John Evans,' was the reply.
"St. Peter looked through his book,
and shook his head.
" 'You don't belong here,' he said,
pointing to the exit.
" 'But I am sure I belong here,' said
the man.
" 'Wait a minute,' said St. Peter.
"He looked again and in the back
of the book found his name.
" 'Sure,' said the of th®
gate, 'you belong here. Hut you was
n't expected for 20 years. Who's your
doctor?' " —Milwaukee Free Press.
HA ZI.
Publisher —The third chattel In this
manuscript is so blurred I can't rnak&
it out.
Author —Yes; that is where I used
London atmosphere. That is the fog,
you know.
We are missing the meaning of life
if we slight the little opportunities
for great living, waiting for the glam
orous, the spectacular.—Grace Willis.
FOUR GIRLS
Restored to Health by Lydia E.
Pinkham's Vegetable Compound.
Rmad What Th my Say.
Miss Lillian Ross, 630
East 84th Stroet^NeW
E. Pinkham's Veget»•
ble Compound over
jMriodio Bufferftg, £d
a 112 ter everything els®
W'lwlKia had failed to help me.
■i< a "d I feel it a duty to
1 1111 l J let others £now ol It."
Katharine Craig,23s®
B fv» W«to Lydia E. Pinkham'*
Vegetable Compound I
YmK am well, after suffering
for months from ner
voub prostration."
Miss Marie StoH*-
Jw|F_ writes was ina run-
i tion and eut-
Pinkham'B Vegotabl®
W Compound made m®
Miss Ellen M. Olwn,
1 B 1? 111., says;/' Ly
~* t;diaE.l'inkham'sVeg©-
'.'.jflme of backache, aid®
—An" ache, and established
my poriods. after th®
best local doctors had
failed to help me."
FACTS FOR SICK WOMEN.
For thirty years Lydia E. Pink
ham's Vegetable Compound, mada
from roots and herbs, has been tha
standard remedy for female ill*,
and has positively cured thousands of
women who have been troubled with
displacements, inflammation, ulcera
tion, fibroid tumors, irregularities,
periodic pains, backache, that bear
ing-down feeling, flatulency, indiges
tion,dizziness,ornervous prostration.
Why don't you try it ?
Mrs. Plnkhnm invites all sick
women to write her for advice.
She has guided thousands to
health. Address, Lynn, Mass.
AfCMTC ran niaku RUO to 1600 In next sis
I O wct'ks canvassing for our great
campaign book, "Great Issues and National Lead
ers' 112 MO pages, 100 engravings. Nearly every voter
will subscri be. Lady agents do as well as men. Best
terms, credit given. A ureal chance to make monef
fast, Grasp It. Complete outtlt free If you send
10c to pav postage. Bend to-day. get ahead of othef
agents. This ad. will not appear again. Address
TIIK F. W. MEAI) I»I H. CO., Johimou, N. Y.
HAIIII A Mfll and women are mak-
TUUIIIS mtn Ing good Incomes by
■ ummmmmm becoming agents fof
Flnlay "Sllvasope," a perfect preparation fof
cleaning silver, gold plated and all tine metal
ware, also cut glass, mirrors, etc. No dust, xut
dirt, no acid. Tbey all Niy: "The best I've ever
used." Large box. 26e. Sample free.
Finlay Manufacturing Co.; 24 Stone St., New York.
hair ß balsam
Never Fails to Restore Grsar
fiOc. fciid t j <*o at
A GOLD MINE IN YOUR HEAD
Why Don't You Work It?
If you an? ingenious and have $".000 or only 110. or
If not Ingenious but have money to invest and want
steady income, write to-day lor free particular®.
American Active Artisans Co.
Terminal Building. F»0 Church Street, NEW YORK.
A Tetter, Itching Tiles,
Pimples, Krysipelaa
Cuts, Burns, Old or Scrofulous Sores and
all Skin Diseases positively cured by the usa
of Itoyd'H Ointment. At your druggist
or 50 cents by mail. BOVI) OINTMENT COMPANY*
Klttanning, Pa.
NEW LAW
ri:%sioxs •*
"SIT::™; Thompson's Eye Water
A. N. K.—C (1908—30) 224 a
7