THE COLUMBIAN, BLOOMSBURG, PA. A GOOD SIGN. That's because its thq sign of money, and jewelry and money is a good thing to have. So is some of our fine jewelry because it is always conver tible into money, only in a different form, which you can wear and enjoy. Have just received a complete line of novelties, just the thing for Easter presents. 3. E, KMX Successor to J. G. Wells, Next door to Post-Office. BLOOMSBURG, PA. NEW GOODS AND NEW PRICES To keep trade active. Men's overalls with bibs, 42c. pair. Oilcloth window shades on spring rollers, 2c each. Felt shades on spring rollers, 2 for 25c. Cotton bats, 7c, 10c. and 15c. each. Chenille table covers 69c, $l.25and $1.75 Shelf paper, 12 sheets for lc. Turkish bath towels, 10c. each. Dress drilling, 6c yard. Ticking, 10c, 13c. and 14c, yd. Shirting, 7c, 8c, 9c. and 10c. yd. Outing flannel remnants, 5c. yd. Calico remnants, 5c. yd. Machine oil, 3c. boUle. Red ink, 3c. bottle. Thimbles, lc. each. Hoys' watch chains, 2c. each. Kaster eggs, 4c, 5c, and 8c. each. Shoe brushes, 10c. and 21c. each. Dust brushes, 10c. each. The New Idea Taper Patterns are fast superseding all others, and the price is only IOC each. BROADWAY CASH STORE,. MOYER'S NEW BUILDING, Mais, St., Bloomsburg, Fa. S&TKCEWONE CoJtXECTH.Y. ZMZTTSIO Hath charms, etc., sings the poet. Music is not only a pleasure but an edu cation as well. . Put one of our pianos or organs in the house and you'll be surprised what a refining influence it has. The cost is insignificant between now and the Holidays. We are offering great inducements in pianos, organs, ana sewing macnines: Pianos from $250 and upwards. Organs from $50 and upwards. World renown White sewing machines from $35 and upwards. Queen sewing machines we are offering at $25 dollars cash. Best sewing machine for the money in the market to-dav. t Also guitars, banjos, violins, harmonicas, and everything in the music line. Best sewing machine needles, and o for ail sewing machines. Pianos ana organs tunea ana repaired. Also all makes of sewing machines repaired J. SMiT2.EE, Gea'L Agent, Main street below Market. BLOOMSBURG, PA THE NEW WOn AN AND THE OLID UVCA-UST and all the rest of the family can be satisfactorily shod at Jones & Walter's Shoe Store. Every day new goods are coming in. The very latest in footwear. The newest in colored leathers. High shoes and low shoes, and shoes of all sizes, and at just what you want to pay price. T WANT A HUSBAND? A t'nlon Veteran Who Want an ei-F.nemjr to Oioom Him it Wife. The ways of Loulpville and her wo mm wra to have stamped themnelvei very favorably on the mind of one vet. eran who attended the encampment At least, a srquel to the big meeting Would Imply as much. The visiting veteran met a prominent ex-Confederate soldier while here, and they nhook hnnds and chatted. "Now that the war Is over," said the veteran, "I should like to get a Con federate badge as a memento." The Confederate got him a badge. "Now, Captain," said the visitor, "will you please put your name and addree on the badge?" The Confederate did this. They part ed. One day during the past week the ex-Confederate received a letter. It was from the old Union soldier. As he read the letter his amazement grew, and In the end he was perplexed. No wonder. The writer, In a very seri ous manner, asked the Louisville man If he could find him a wife Home nice, rnlddle-nged woman. Ho mUJ, further, that his Wlfp hud Hl.'fl nrwl If wan hi desire to marry araln and move to Georgia, If he could find a suitable consort. The ex-Confeoerate Is keeping hla eyes open for a suitable woman. Louisville Courier-Journal. She Waxn't lirem She was such a pretty girl. Sweet 17 Just budding Into fair womanhood. She had been reared among the blue grass hills of old Kentucky, and this was her first vllt to the city. She wus the gues( of the mother of her Intended liusbnnd. Everything had been done to make her visit a pleasant one, and the dear little thing had been moving In a per fect Elysium of bliss. Charley dear Charley had been her constant com panion, and this, with the wonderful nights to be seen in greater Cincinnati, had caused the little maiden's heart to overllow with Joy. One night Char ley suggested going to the Grand Opera House. The simple village maiden had never been to the theatre, but she had heard much of it and determined that she would be as blase as any of the audience. They reached the theatre early; very few had arrived. The lights were low. They sat and talked awhile. Oh. she was so happy. Just then the electric lights were turned on to their full pow er, and Bhe naively remarked that "she had seen no one bring In more lights," but still she was happy. The play began. She eat entranced. To her, poor Hip was the dearest, sweetest, good-for-nothing old fellow In the world. When the curtain arose on the fourth act, and Mr. Jefferson Is dis covered as Old Hip, after his sleep of twenty years, she turned to Charley and remarked: "Why, Charley, who is that old man? I haven't seen him be fore." Charley replied. "Why that's Jeffer son as Hip. He is supposed to have been sleeping for twenty years, and has grown very old." The dear, sweet young thing cast a reproachful look out of her bewitching eyes upon her Intended husband and said: "Oh, Charley; I know I am from the country. I know that I am what you city people call 'very green,' but, really, I am not that green, I have watched Mr. Jefferson carefully all the evening, and I know that old man there on the stage is not he. Oh, no, I'm not that green." Then the curtain fell and they went out. Cincinnati Tribune. A Iteiuliilftceiic-c. "Grandpa," asked little Clarence Cal lipers, addressing old Eben Tutgall, who had come in from Squam Corners to spend a few days with his daughter, little Clarence's mother, "what Is a schism?" "Heh?" ejaculated the old man, who had been nodding on the verge of a dose. "What's that?" "What's a schism grandpa? I have Just been reading an item about a church being broken up by a schism." "A slzzum, eh?" chuckeled the patri arch. "Wart pshaw, Clarence, you ought to know what a slzzum is eh, but I forgot that you've alwers lived in the city, an" come to think about it, 1 e'pose it's no more'n nat'ral that you shouldn't know. A sizzum, Clarence, is Jest about the ornerlest varmint among created critters. Break up a church, heh? Warl, I guess a slzzum would break up any sort of a gatherln' that it tried to, an' it wouldn't have to try very hard, either. K'he! I remember when a couple of big old slzzums got to fight In" under the Methodist Church one night durln' a revival, twenty-odd years ago. My buzz! I never smelt anything like It in all my born days. Nusstr, never! Why, pshaw, azefeddlty wasn't to be compared with it! Phews-s-s-eh! It was so bad that a couple of harden ed old sinners that had resisted the tears an' appeals of the brethren an' sisters for more'n a woek Jumped up an' fairly scampered to the altar, think In' that the other placed was uncappea an' the Old Boy hlmBelf right at hand. K'he! Hemember it Jest as well as if Jt had been yesterday!" Making llargalna. ' "Everything marked down to the low. est possible point?" said the merchant, Inquiringly. "Everything!" replied the clerk. "I put the $1.50 Bilks at $1.25, and every thing elBe in proportion." "At $1.25!" exclaimed the merchant "Are you crazy?" "Why, no, sir; you told me to mark them down for a genuine bargain sale." "Of course I did; but do you think a woman can ever see a bargain In even money? Make tham either $1.24 or $1.26 at once." Chicago Post. Not I'p to tl.e l'liyslcal Kiulremntn. "Madame," said the weary wanderer, "I hope you will believe me when I say that I have not always been the bat tered wreck you see before you. Indeed, when I lost these two fingers and this eye I was one of the most prosperous Aldermen In Chicago." Cincinnati En. quirer. What Eiperlence Tealiea. "Which do you think Is the safer side of the stock market," eald SpattB to Bloobumper, "the long side or the short Bide?" "There Is a third side, which I con sider much safer than either you hav najnf d," replied Bloobumper. "What side la that?" i. outsld," Harper's Buar. . . ,- FOUR HUNDRED BELOW ZERO. Cniioni KfTcrts of Such Kitreme Tempera ture on Iron and Color. Four hundred and twenty-four de. grees F. below rero! Just what this means it Is almost Impossible to imagine, and yet it is one of the tem peratures which have been reached and used In lalxnatory research, and has been made the subject of some highly Interesting experiments and explana tions by Professor Dewar before the British Hoynl Institution. Four hundred degrees below ecro Is not an every-day temperature, nor can it be reached by more every-day means than the expansion of liquid air, which latter Professor Drunr has succeeded in producing In comparatively large fnmntltles, and In storing by novel and ingenious methods, to be used as re quired in the study of matter at ab normally low temperature, exactly as a spirit lamp or a llunsen burner Is used In etudylmr the properties of different bodies at the higher temperatures. The tensile streneth of Iron nt W be low zero Is Just twice whnt it Is at 60 above. It will take a strain of fiO In stead 01" "0 tons, to the square Inch, and equally cutliius results lwve come out bh to the elongation of metal.'i under these conditions. It was an idea of Faraday that the magnetism In a per tnnnent magnate would be Increased at veiy low temperatures, and experiments with comparutlvely low temperatures had rather negatived Faraday's sugges tion, but Prof. Dewar has completely verified the opinion of the famous sa vant, br.vlng shown that a magnet at the extremely low temperature made possible by the liquid air had Its power increased by about 50 per cent. Very low temperature was shown also to have a rcmarknble effect upon the ?olor of many bodies. For example tho brilliant scarlet of Vermillion and mer curic lodld Is 1 educed under Its Influ ence to a pale orange, the original color returning with the rise of the tempera ture. 1 slues, on the other hand, are un alVected by cold, and the effect Is com paratively small upon organic coloring in matters of all tints. Cossler's Magazine. FOILING1 THE FIRE FIEND. A flood Tltlnar Hint PiKlien Itnelf Along In a tleaiitlful Way. A merchnnt of Gowanda has Invented j a moft remarkable apparatus for suv I Ing stocks of goods from fire. Instead j of putting out the fire the apparatus opens the front of tlie store, nnu in counters, cases and shelving roll out into the street Into their owner's arms. Tho shelving and counters In the store are all portable, and mounted on roll ers. Attached to the rear of the shelv ing Is a cable which runs forward ami over a wheel below the floor In the front cf the store. To this end of the cablo are suspended weights sufficiently heavy to overbalance the shelving, cases and goods in them. A brake devices keeps the weights from setting the ma chine mlng. Attached to the. lever of the brake Is a combust lie cord which porses upward Into the store and is car ried aling the walls and celling, where It will bo quickly Ignited In case of fire, 'ihe sundering of the cord loosens I ho brake, the weights bear on the cablo nnd tho shelves start belter skelter for the front of the building. At the same tune the windows r.nd dors open auto matically outward, nnd the entire con tents of the store nre dumped on tln sidewalk In a Jiffy. To frustrate the lie lilgn of lire thieves the shelves fold ur vhen they reu"h the street, prcsentiiit; orly blank wood and glass. Those who have seen the apparnlus te rted say that It works odnilrubly. One lilht a mouse found something palat able .In the brake cord and gnawed it In two, whereupon, much to Its conster nation, the furniture, boxes nnd shelves wKh one accord began a swift move ment forward, nnd an automatic alarm tUached to the machine began to rouse nl! the inhabitants of Gownndn, the hour being 2 o'clock In the morning. The Ingenious Inventor was one of the first on tho scene, and his disgust at I ( Inn routed out by a false alarm was greatly mitigated by the spectacle of the 1 month working of his machine. It stems to be a good thing, and pushes Itself fJong with no help. Buffalo Ccurler. Tlin K'nslluli of tho Indiana. Lieut, Grote llutcheson, aide-de-camp to Gen. Copplnger, Is In receipt of a highly Interesting letter from one of his brother officers now in camp at Fort Hall agency in Idaho, the home of the Indians who were mixed up In the re cent Jackson's Hole trouble. The let ter is interesting because It has noth ing to say of Jackson's Hole, which Is a relief. Instead, It deals largely with conditions at Fort Hall from the stand point of a student of ethnology. "I am taken," says the writer, whoso name Lieut. Hutcheson does not feel at liberty to mention, "with the speech of the Indians In their communication with the whites. Having little to oc cupy time, I have bothered to look In to the origin of the kind of language which I hear used by Indians and- trad ers in their talk with one another. It suggests the slang of the Bowery, be ing a purely artiliciul adjunct to both the Indian and the Knglirfh language. It suggests, too, the baby talk of young mothers, who Insist on phicii.g verbs where nouns should be, ai:d who prefer mixing up their first, second, asid third persons to taking them straight. For Instance, there la the word 'mebbe.' At llrst I thought this to be a sort of corruption of may be, meaning perhaps, or used In a doubting way. This Is not true. The Indian and the white in con versation use 'mebbe' as an affirma tive. 'Mebbe get wagon' is the strong est way of declaring that you will get a wagon. 'You eat mebbe' brings de light to the Indian, for that is a prom ise of giving him food, a promise which may by no means be evaded. A white man, too, In conversing with an Indian when an Indian will converse, and when he knows even this patois, injects 'mebbe' into his talk at every fourth word, or If he gets exlcted he puts it in at the third. "There is no pronoun in the mixed vocabulary of the reservation. The words 'white man' and 'Injun' will fill In for all the persons and all the cases, too, by the way. Somebody will write an Indian-English grammar some day, and it will be comprised in less than a hundred words. Simplicity takes the place of expllcitness, I am bound to say, and sometimes you have to use a carefully trained ear to know whether it is a threat, a command, a promise, or a request that Is being flung at you. Mood is unknown In the grammar of the Bannack. "I discover that the English language of Fenimore Cooper and Oil Coomes are non-existent, I have dug profoundly Into the 'Ugh' and the three-word sen tences of the novelist, and I And they are out of fashion. If you succeed In getting an Indian to talk to you at all he will not shut oft with three words ending in an exclamation point. Neith er will he use the expression 'pale face.' No self-respecting Indian says 'pale face' now. "Although the language Is a study worth attention. Seriously, I imagine a text book could be compiled which would really result in a great good for the Government in bringing the Indians to something like civilized habits. As it Is, the Instruction Is based on the same conditions as prevail in the Eng lish language and with English-speaking persons. This does not fit the In dian. His language 1b simplicity itself, and there are two twists of case, tense, of the like. As to tense, one Illustra tion will show. Take the word 'Go.' We have It 'go, went, gone, going, will go,' while the Indian puts In two cases, 'go' and 'was go.' If he wishes to make It a future tense he simply puts In the specific time, as 'He go to-morrow, mebbe,' which to my mind is quite expressive of the Idea, I seriously be lieve attention might be called to this situation among scholastic men and perhaps we would be able to get along without raBcally and Incompetent in terpreters. One hundred words would be a good vocabulary." Council Bluff f Dally Nonpareil. ...... u The True Coinietki. A "Daily Header" asks about ths quinine bath which "complexion spe. clullsU" recommend, This is merely a wash of alcohol In which a little qui nine has been dissolved. It Is said to "tone up" the skin and increase lt ability to throw off Impurities. But much better for the skin than the us of any tonic of this kind are plenty ol fresh air, a good digestion, a dally bath, and no end of fine, pure soap. New York Tribune, (scored With Hie .lury. Pome gray-haired lawyer-politicians pat In nn up-town hotel talking over their early experiences. The conversa tion was opened by the man from up the Slate remarking: "I see that old Dennis Keeny has Just Oled up In my native town. He was one of the last of the old-style lawyers who relied for winning their cases not on their knowledge of law. but on their acquaintance with human nature. He was one of the best specimens of tho class, too. Stories of his retorts and witty sayings ure told all over his own un.' the adjoining counties. "The firnt time 1 ever heard him was In the case of a man who was on trial for shoeting Into a party that had come lo 'horn' him, a form of country celebra tion that you have probably heard about. Keeny appeared for the defend r.?it. It was shown that the gun with vhloh the shooting was done was load ed with dried peas, Instead of lead. Finally, a very dirty-looking witness r.-as called, and testified that he had been shot in the right leg. On cross examination the fellow appeared rather sl.ll'ty, and finally Keeny asked him to sb.e.w the Jury the exact spot where the I t os took effect. The fellow demurred, laying that the shooting hnd been done six weeks before, and the wound had healed. At Jast with great reluctance, the witness drew up his right trousers leg, exposing a limb well covered with eltrt. Pointing to a spot which, if pos sible was blacker than the rest, the wit ness said: 1 " 'There; that's where they went In." "Keeny turned to he Jury, and In his most Impressive manner said: " 'Gentlemen. I leave it to your knowl edge of crop3; if peas had been planted in that soli six weeks ago they would be In blossom now.' "The witness retired In confusion, and Keeny won his case." New York Sun. C hlinnile Fodilen't Creator. Mr. Edward Townsend, the creator of Chlmmlo Fadden, relates how the fol lowing Incident put him on Chlmmle's track a few days before he wrote the first newspaper sketch: "I was visiting a mission where some ladles were giv ing a dinner to tenement house chil dren which I was to report. I noticed one little fellow near me gulp down a piece of pie In about two bites. The young lady In charge, who seemed to be on very good terms with the boys and assumed a pretty air of comrade ship, was standing by and saw the pie disappear. She leaned over and said, with a bite of the boy's manner for good fellowship: 'Would you like an. other piece if I can sneak It?' His eyes bilghtened. She brought the pie and placed It before him with a little confi. ' dentlal whisper, as though It were a special favor, of which he was .not to tell. As she did so the boy leaned over and kissed her hand. It must have been the innate gentleman in him. No one ce.uld have taught him. It may be that he had seen a courtier do it on some Bowery stage, but I think it was Just his own natural tribute. That was my, flist insight into the Bowery character. It set me thinking, and when I wanted to write a 'special' I UBed the people I h.t(l seen there, making up my own etcry." Bookman. An nventor's Ureain. Ellas Howe almost beggared himself ; before he discovered where the eye or the needle of a sewing machine should be located. His original Idea was to fol low the model of the eye at the heel. It never occurred to him that It should be placed near the point, and he might have failed altogether if he had not di earned he was building a sewing ma chine for a savage king In a strange country. Just as In his actual waking ..nci-innpii he was rather nernleved ' about the needle's eye. He thought the i king gave him twenty-four hours to complete a machine and make it Bew. If not finished In that time, death was to be the punishment. Howe worked and worked and puzzled and puzzled, and finally gave it up. Then he thought he; was taken out to be executed. He noticed that the warriors carried spears that were pierced near tho head. In etantly came the solution of the dllflt culty, and while the inventor was beg ging for time he awoke. He Jumped out of bed, ran to his workshop, and by nine, a needle with an eye at the point had been rudely modeled. After that It was easy. This is the true story of an important Incident in the invention ot the sewing , machine, Philadelphia I'lmfci. ?-C:ia'S SOT Wi-.:..1 vims j, Wll WLS-IUKKK, Ta., April 1, tSj5, Tlic Spting reason find us fully r'ii;.j:t:ii ii!i tlic frcslifst and hri;:htc-.t i.cciv f'.ict is wc have iH'vcr seen ;: more beautiful CrtHvcti'.);: of Spring ncrc?s;;rics lh,m ;uv foim.J display -el ,Jn ci:r coi:n'CMS,t',!C "Id r.(Jatc"I;.rrv tiling Hof.i a ncci.lL' to an anchor" applies ff'.(i tu our store ; we are p.ivviyrs lo the people and make it a poi.M r lo'cp just what they want .ud in Ihe right way. Cur Mail OrJcr Department luisi. ncss has Uehltd hi volume of iu;si ncss, which indicate.-! that we have struck' the p;iii;ilai' chord both ai to quality of goods and Io.vikss in prices, it is pleasant to buy timu.;h the mai s. in trouble.no worry, cvcryllvng is done for you in aa intelligent LVirncr by clerks -.hilled in the selecting and matching of goods, try this p.vthod, you'll soon rcali.e its uiafy raiva:.tagcs. '1 week we are displaying a ii'.-autiful line of I.ares.S'-inelhiiigthat every body waists especially at this season when I ghlr-r sirtings are the order of the day. Irish I'oint Lac?-, C-'j'iQ n K c r u and W&Qf'frf White arc Sc. 10c, '9cand25e. jv'.4? lr'C Heavy Venice r'o V, ' H White at :;c, 19 and..3$c. Ueau hr ::';m:-'?'-'.:.7 t i f it 1 Torchon Cail"--Laces m hand some patterns are frosn 5c to 39c. Oriental I .aces in Cieats; .sn I Kern range from Ifcto $1.5. Hand some L:sce Collars to in- wo. n over Spring waists or dresses from 50c l.o $6.93. Our Capes this feaso.i are little g c tn s they arc made from : rcat 1 miftvnf:inrr-ri.iU 'C,!fc'i"f:.:',:i'vi'v and are trimmed yfUzi.C' in cquisite taste. ('A fi Hla N"ad cloth "ij JYV ) " double capes, full ' y ripple embroider fd with Soutache braid, a beauty for early Spi ing wear on sale at $2.98. Full tipple double cape made plain Wcrsted cloth is $3.98. One similarly nude with Velvet collar is a bargain at $498. Rich tan l?road cloth capes with strap scams, pcrrl button, trim mings and Velvet collar, a very itylish cape for young ladies $5.98. Full rippple doable cape A'ith Soutache braid trimmings and numerous sinall pearl buttons is Two special bargains a"e orlered :his week is; ladic3 shoes, Russet button and lace, shoes, narrow toe, Full heel or spring heel are marked at $1.98 worth much more. Ladies' fine Dongola button and lace shoes, 20th century last, "The New Shape" is rcajy a beautiful and stylish shoe and warranted of good wearing qualities, splendid value at our price $2.23. For China ware we should be consulted. Wc doubt if you could obtain a line to compare with ours tt such moderate prices, we oftef is a 'eadcr an English Porcelaine Dinner Set in brown or blue dec orations, consisting of too pieces it $675. Our new importations ofllavi ands China embraces many beau .iful designs, we can supply them in Dinner and Tea sets, in any .usnber of pieces :s we are the Jirect importers of these poods we are able to save ycu big com missions. BOCKS : Write to us for any book you jesire to obtain, we supply any book want. Wc recommend the Red letter iries of paper bound books fof ight and pleasant reading, 1 5 titles to choose from, at per copy r-c. Wc would be, pleased to havo jur patrons communicate with us upon any store matters, all1" quirics receive prompt attention Respectfully, 1 it- 1 Cor. W. Market and roblic SqpW