Ul niM OF MirK.tSRD SOhDIKHS.
Wm. Thonins, burial of Isaac
Hilt' nln aMW
C. T. Sloan, burial of 11. c.
Fves. v. Kunirst unit Abrnm
. Kellmv mion
3. W. Kvans. imrlid of v. ('.
Hiirnnrd .r 0)
Kdwurd stewar', Initial of
Trior Honnv r.ino
ii. U Hakcr, burial of Jimlnli
Kecdy :)j(iO
W. K. rl"tterleh, builal of
James Krnvler 5 00
II. r. Michaels, burial of
Jninos Hvnn 31 00
U. 11. Kri'iii9T, burial of IV-
ward Kreinser .15 0i)
J. N. Piter, burial of N.n I. a i-
ii 11 Jiwlln ill ro
Holi-rt. Anderson, builal or
Hiivld WaikliiH . :::nK)
Herman I'. Young, headstone
for H. Minis Ki 00
L. Kurtz A son, hrnrlton"s
for Isaac Uruiii, I. bi ll tain,
H. Tartleton, .1. W. Moiiart.
or, II. ('. I'.vi'H, ,1. .i .
mark, 1. Iioimy, A. Int. I
andt. 11111 ir.no
1 Mil CO
IlhCAl'lTlI.A TIOS.
Miscellaneous expenses 11 '. ti.)
Courts, lurnrs' pay .constat!- s'
return to sessions iviui m
Costs In couitnoiiM cult h cases j.vji no
Itond and bridge views nml
road iliimii"cH 1 I'll 51
Commissioners' ofllco tad
court House Villi i:
County Jail sum
rrtnlliiir.slatloiicry and pus'. (.'. r.n
Inquisitions t in
Utilises, budding nml repairs la !."i
I'etilletHI try alal asylums.. WMIW
Assessors' pay flair
Sculps i in
Kloellon expenses Mm; oil
Wank books .mi i M
Taxes renin le. I 7'H .T
liuilal of deceased soldier.. .'mien
-t lar;? si
RKCA PtTt'l.A TIOS fr l-wr.I'MKSrs UK.
VEIVKUbX 77 A' nil-Khii.s Of rtIK
cur.wr.
I. ). Sw ank, duvs nt
oniee. 17(1 in :1.M) Ml." : 0
J. (). Swank for de
livering t'leetlon
tlekets, repaint of
bildires and road,
mid briilire views.
Todays e l'i.50....
Sl'.'J 5,1
s."7 50
J. (J. Swank, travel.
Inir expenses ac
crued dining year
W. II. rtt, davs nt
nniee, mi fv.w..
XV. II. Ttt, fordellv
(M l ng books, elec
tion tickets, re
pairs of billies,
road and bildce
views, in days
).5!
V II. t tt, travel
Itn; expense ne.
crued during year
. M. Ikeler davs at
ofllce, 1KI ('. J.'l.w..
ii. M. Ikeler, for de
livering bonks,
election tickets,
repairs of brtdires,
road und bridge
views, t4 davs i
I H.50
O. M. Ikeler, travel
Inwr expenses ac
crued during year
$ipii re.
Clll.
108
v: hj
1S9.
833
174 7 0
$PT5 7(1
llifi 1 0
ti7 an
tr,5 J
S.-..11 7il
l:l'.7 H
Mill M
M tl U
rs.i i o
in nil
s on
51 7i
m 8n
til KJ
r. M. TenvllllEor, Clerk
C. H. Knt, Kcgistcr and liecorder
). M. vulek, I'rothonotuy
J. K Fowler. Treasurer
-f. H. Mclleury, Hii-rnr
Newton Walker, Menogiuplier. ,
W. 11. Kliawn, Atty.
1) It corrinan, Janlior nml cou-r eiier .
(IM Iloldivn, Jinl-nr ai I il t"i Min is..
II II Kline, Janitor at, J ill tor ! mos. ..
W M Monroe, county aiiitli ir
W A itrelsliacli. count v aiulilor.
W F Stolmer, county audlior
COL'S TV F1XAXCKS.
1 IAIIM.ITIKS.
Amonnf of outstanding binds USS.W on
lToutlng debt eslluiaud is;j 00 157:150 CO
$157350 00
Amt. tnx otitstandV f : 7-'--:i 74
Leaseht. coiu.ex.elo ."(i to
f lfii78 7l
Amt. stnte personnl tux due
from commonwealth tor tii .fKit7
Hul. In lianos ( ounty Ti-ens.. l:io7 S3
Amt. of county share license
commission allowed subject
to appeal K50
i. 3419 41
$ I '' XhiO t (i
Amount of county bonds due
ihsw t 45aooo
Amount of Interest ou bonds
for 18'Jti fiJIOO)
t 10710 00
We rertlfy that the foregoing is a lull nnd ac
curate statement of all receipts and expendi
tures lor Columbia county for the year lw.s.
J. (i. swank.) corn's
U. V. K KI,KH, of
W. II. I 'l T, j Col. CO.
Attest : C. M. Terwillioeh. clerk.
We, the underflgneil nudCors of Columbia
cuitity, being electe d to adjust and selale the
aecmuits of the Treasurer and Commissioners
of Columbia county, do hereby certliy that we
met at the Commissioners' and Treasurer's
unices In Hloomsliuig, .Monday, .Tauuury lith,
InhI, at 9 o'clock, and proceeded to audit the
accounts of the above named oniees, and after
carefully examining 1 he same from Jan. 1, lS'.tt.
to .Ian. 1, lKDii, we Und a balance lu t he hands of
J. If. Fowler, Treasurer, of (tlSKil.Mi thirteen
thousand oue hundred stNty-oue and S3-loo dol
lars. W.M. MONHOE, )
w. a. MtHsHACH ,V Auditors.
W. F. KTOHNEK, )
Attest: C. M. Tshwii-lhikk lleik
t'ettthrrs ai Popular Trimming.
Vcntlieru are everywhere. Combined
with iiuitntion jewels unJ jet ll.ey inuUv
most elaborate triuiiuiiifrs. Vimclyl:o
points niado of black ostrich plumes
are strikingly clVective on lijrht col
ored eveiiiii(' powiis. Small curly tips
nre used for outlining decollete bodices.
In the stores narrow feather trimming
is sold by the yard for expensive cloth
costumes. It is appliqned to the bodice
to Biintilate a vest or to outline kcshis,
Spangles are frequently combined with
a feather fringe. Trimmings formed
of feather pondantsareanothernovelty.
The pendants swin from a jeweled
band, and outline ucorsagu beautifully.
The newest satins for evening gowns
have raised velvet flowers for the de
signs and ore wonderfully soft and
Leuutiful.
;" A Word About lilrtbdayg.
' A lonely woman, one who vvus bear
ing patiently a preut sorrow, surprised
a f riend one day by saying: "Come, with
me next Tuesday, it is my birthday,
and I want you to help me celebrate it."
"Why should she care to celebrate her
birthday?" thought the friend. Hut
the next week she learned, for the sor
rowful one weut louded with giftu to an
institution in w hich she took a keen
Interest. "I want some one to be glad
that I was Born," said she, and that is
the noblest, best and huppiest thought
that can come to us on our birthdays.
It la pleasant to bo remembered and to
receive presents, butwhetliersurrouud
pd, with love or suffering from neglect,
which is more often thoughtlessness
than intention, we cun niuke Boine one
happier because we were born.
THE WORLD OF FASHION.
WARMEST OF XVINTKU UAHMENTS
NOW IX VOtilK,
Ttip 1'rlnctm rcrrllnn Wrnp-Fnr Tnat
Are In Favor The Trilby Apron
lionm for Indoor M'eur Intent Shape
of the Iluitle.
Spcc'al New York Letter.
The coining of cold weather has been
welcomed by fnshlon with rnthUHlnnin.
SkatliiK nnd promenading; have taken
the place of the bicycle us nn outdoor
t xerclse, and furs, cloaks, collars, lions,
caen. and nil the paraphernalia of the
cold weather costume have b.-en substi
tuted for the mild weather narbs that
fn lonar held sway. What pretty wo
man docs not know that she looks pret
tier than ever on the promenade, on a
clear colli day, with n general effect
ct black orrsettiim her gluwlnsT cheeks
"V '
Th? Pilm eis rere'.lnfc
and eyes llayltlng with the pride of nn
Irn siMlblo nppearanee? The Princess
lVrcKno fur is at present the popular
sl le for outdoor wraps. The most
b,-dutiful and coytly garment of this
description reen this season la owned
and worn by Mrs. O. H. V. Belmont
fnee Jirs. Alva Vandorbilt). It is made
of Kussian cable, nnd Is Kald to have
cost fift.vn thousand dollars. It Is
exquisitely cut and lined with Persian
Filk, into which threads of gold and
resfda f;roon are interwoven. The
Hklr.s which compose it are bcautlfull)
matched.
Hut one need not spend so much
money on a Pereline. It Is the style
nnd not the material that is the most
Important. The favorite style of Pere
line forms a deep, full cape, leaching
almost to the waist line at the back,
and termlnatlnK In broad stole ends In
front, where they meet the hem of the
Kkirt. Only furs of the best quality are
used. V.'l.en designed fur a young wo
inai., it i.ii9 a IiinKe of tails around the
circular cafe, and the stole ends are
finished oti at the bottom In the same
manner.
Anion;; the favorite furs of the sea
son muy be named marten, mink and
sable, rie.il and Persian lamb find fa
vor always among a certain clique.
Smooth rutin r than Huffy furs are us.d
for making Ptlerlnes and capes, as
their sie, when developed in a Ions
haired lur, would make, them awkward
in appearance.
Fur fowiia have been conspicuous
this st-aiion both as ball dresss and
street corlunies. Krr.iine is largely
used for the former t'ov.ns, and every
variety of it lias been utilized for visit
ing toiuts. Prejudice forbids the weur
lng of ermine save for the most elab
orate social functions, where handsome
frowns arc the rule and not the excep
tion. Among the most fashionable fur gar
ments is noted the trim, close-fitting
jacket, with rippl-j back. This Is usual
ly made of Persian lamb or sealskin.
The boa lias resumed sway and is
meeting with much approval. Short
boas, fasteniiifi; at the neck with a head
and clust.-r of tails, are seen. They
are not so graceful as the long boas,
but have several good points to recom
mend them.
The Trilby craze has at last reached
the fashionable world, and by the way
i;f England, as was natural, as the
fad Is still in full sway there. Besides
tre Trilby coat, Trilby shoe, Trilby hat,
and Trilby collar, there Is now the
The Trilby Apron.
Trilby apron.. The latter Is
one of - the prettiest of the
new articles of attire named after
the heroine of Mr. llu Maurler's novel.
It is made of white muslin lawn, and
is embroidered and tucked and filllud
round the skirt.
The bib Is also plaited and embroi
dery runs along its top and around
the ( i auU ts. As first produced for the
London market these Trilby aprons
were ornamented with the design of a
primrose, which Is the emblem of a
I league of Kngllsh women Interested in
politics. Since that time, hbwever,
i other flowers have been used In the
embroidery of the new apron.
The Trilby apron is now to be seen
nt many fashionable afternoon funcr
thins In the west end of London, and la
likely to become "the rage." A Nevyr
York drygoods merchant said recently
that It would soon be placed upon the,
market In that-clty,but under another
tiume, as everything conducted with
,v,.A.v V'&
THE COLUMBIAN,
Trilby Is now repnrded in commercial
circles n out of date.
lor linlocr wenr, one sees at th
Phops cuiiie eNqulMlto creations In neg
llgo mirmetilH. Some are of silk, othrvs
of the finest wool, whlh; a few very
elaborate ones nr of ptitln brocade.
There Is a wonderful new material
railed wool satin that Is being made up
Into ten jackets nnd morning robes be
cause of Its exquisite softness. It is
wool, with a surface of satin, the Hllk
threads being thrown up on the out
side. It la mnrvolously luminous, and
falls In soft graceful folds. It Is an
oriental stun, nnd all fashionable fem
inine Paris has gone mnd over it. The
ellk mntinees come In delicate blues
and greens and pin km, nnd are some
times In chine and pompadour effects.
The wool creations nre In every con
celvnble color, light and dark and me
dium, and all cosey and comfortable.
one Is forced to ackuowledx:: that the
bustle has really made its reappearance
In society. It Is seen not only In the
tihow-cnses of the stores, but IU pres
ence beneath the ripple coats may be
enslly ivuessed. So far It Is a short
affair, which simply causes the plaits
of the skirt or the folds of the Jacket
to flare very decidedly below the waist
line. Its effect may be gathered from
the accompanying Illustration. It is
not necessary to rurmlse that the bus
tle will Rrow In size, nlthouKh It Is
always Impossible to predict what
vagary of fashion will grow In popu
larity. The flaring sklit In Its nature
Is opposed to the use of a large bustle,
hence It Is reasonable to suppose that
Its revival will be of brief duration.
The chamois Jacket Is an nbibifd ar
ticle of attire. It has Its uses. It Is
an excellent undcr-wrap on a day when
the mercury Is disappearing through
the bulb of the tube. It may also be
worn with more or l.ss profit und-r the
dress waist by those who wish to dis
pense with wraps on warmer days. Hut
as its province la to exclude the air
utterly It should never be vorn In the
house. It is not for teas and recep
tions. It Interferes with the action of
the pores If worn long, and Its only
proper province Is as a protection
a.catnst the cold air.
SUIrts have varied In fulness all the
way btwecnn five and eight yards
M'ound .ut the heavy hair cloth Inter
lin'.r.i; vo necessary to correct style In
the corly part of the year hi reduced to
a narrow facing, and the very latest
dress skirts are cut short enough to
ilcnr the ground by nearly two Inches.
A marked feature of the modes this
winter is the abundance of trimming
about the neck; ruches and ruffs and
gauzy chiffon, and bows of Immense
size ar?worn In the most becoming fash
Jon, and are the art of mailing up fur
EfTect of the Bu-tlo.
Into fanciful godet collars and revers,
as if It were cloth of the softest fix
ture, has developed many novelties In
neckwear during the season.
Although a number of luuntv Knnnlsb
and Etcn jacket, brill. ant wltii Pi l . Ian
or j.t beads and pani;lert, appear
ni ng new winter toilets, for Creasy
w.. , they are very largely i i placed by
tin jacket-bodice, which shows a chlo
bit of Itself below the
fri m the former style of jacket-bodice
m' te in nnish than In outline, the rev
ers b. ing faced with white satin, mlrolr
Velvet, Persian brocade, or other rich
material, with fiat cape collar over the
shoulders that Joins the revers on each
side.
Would Surely Know liar.
On the subject of books Mrs. Grand
Is authority, as she Is a great reader,
delving deep into all manner of topics,
including psychology. Her devotion to
American authors Impressed me at
once, when she admitted that from
Bret Harte she had learned much In
deed. She said: "My whole faculty for
keen observation has been developed by
his writings." She has books for every
mood .and knows Emerson from cover
to cover, turning to sympathetic chap
ters readily, thus showing that the well
thumbed book, which she declared la
always at her bedside, is very dear to
her.
She tells such amusing stories about
hearing Sarah Grand attacked by peo
ple who had not caught her name at
he Introduction, A quaint, old-fash-,
ioned dowager, seated alongside of her
recently at a five-o'clock "at home,"
said: "My dear, that dreadful woman,
Madam Grand, Is here, they tell me.
Now of course I shall recognlie her,
because she will be loud In dress, talk
a great deal and be utterly 'Impossible.'
I am sure there Bhe Is," continued the
dowager, as she pointed to a woman
answering that description, while the
leal Sarah Grand, In her quiet, artistic
frock, with amusement heard herself
abused.
"Did you tell her eventually who you
were?" was eagerly asked by a listener
to the story.
"No, I could not. I do like old ladles,
and she would have felt so uncomfort
able If I had undeceived her. You see,
I was a perfect coward, for I hurried
away, leaving her to abuse the 'impose
olble' woman who was in the corner,"
One Cau or Wrlnklra,
If women realized that straining tho
eyes produces wrinkles, more would ex
ercise a proper care of these members.
Heading by a dim or failing light, com
ing suddenly from a dark room to a
light one, or vice versa, overworking
the eyes In any way, and last, but by
no means least, wearing dotted and
cross-barred veils; tnese and taxing th
eyesight are of assistance .n the wrin
kle making: process. -
BLOOMSBURG, PA.
ABOUT TEXAS GEESE.
Itemarknbln Intolllnenc IilnpUyerl ai
luperl,! by a CltUen.
"I have been hnvlng a good deal ot
trouble lately with thy birds on my
poosn ranch," Fald Col. Stltt-Floyd, of
W harton, Tex.
"I had an order for a thousand dozer
goose eggs, and my troubles all arose li
trying to fill that ordo' It U tho first
time I attempted to market any egg.
always heretofore relylrre on the sulr
of feathers and live birds for my prodt
"This Is the laying, nnd hatching sea
son with us, and I thought I would
have no trouble to get rggs enough to
fill the order. Now, a hen, you know,
will let you rob her nest right along.
Just so you leave one egg It is sup
posed that a hen hns no Idea whatever
of numbers. But this Is not true of
Madame Goose, as I found out to my
Borrow.
"The first two or three dnys we se
cured a big batch of fresh eggs, but af
ter that the 'find' began to dwindle
down so fast that I determined to make
a personal Investigation. I went down
to the river bottom next dny and found
that Instead of being off attending to
business all the geese which were not
sitting had flocked' nnd were roving
about feeding, just as If they never ex
pected to lay another egg. When I np
proachod them. Instead of running
away, they all sat down and began to
hiss at me.
"It was a clear case of strike, and I
was at a loss to know how to settle the
trouble. I tried putting half a dozen
porcelain eggs In each nest, but It
would not work. The geese came up,
eyed them solemnly and walked off.
Then, In despair, I told the hoys to put
the eggs we hnd gathered back and see
if that would break the strike.
"Well, sir. Inside of two hours after
the eggs were returned every goose was
back on her nest, and for the next four !
or five days there were more eggs laid
on tho Floyd's ranch than had been be
fore In years; but I dare not undertake
to fill the egg order."
Mlntakcn Niirrlllrm.
A certain woman, with a small in
come and a large heart, has a family
of Imjioeunlous cousins mostly girls,
of the type that cannot earn then own
living, and let themselves helplessly
down upon the nearest available bene
factor. She worried over them last
winter considerably, because she was
sure the necessaries of life were run
ning low in their little house, and she
finally gave up her Christmas ptes
ents to her own family, and sent tho
cousins a check Instead. Two weeks
later she met two of the girls at a tea
they always go to everythln and to
her amazement each wore a handsome
gold buckle ot her waist. "Dear Cousin
Jane," one of them said, effusively, "we
were so grateful for your gift! We
have wanted buckles for a year, and
now we have gotten them through our
kindness!" Cousin Jane's feelings, ns
she thought of her home Christmas sac
rificed for these adornments butchered
to make a Roman holiday, as It were
can be Imagined.
She could sympathize with another
friend In Now York, who gave up go
ing to hear Pattl, with her son and
daughter, In order that she might senr
the money for the three tickets $13
to relatives, who, she knew, were much
straitened by the business crisis, and In
actual need of ready money. What was
her surprise to hear, next day, that
three of the family had treated them
selves promptly to Pattl on receiving
the cheek. "It came Just In the nicit
of time!" one of them said, apprecia
tively; but, of course, Mrs. could
rot feel It as providential a happening
cs they seemed to do.
Three gentlemen, none of them
wealthy, meeting at sea shore last sum
mer, happened to discuss the needs of
nn old classmate, and each pledged
himself to aid toward a generous r-i ft.
The recipient, when last heard from,
wns enjoying the Atlanta exposition on
the proceeds, while his three benefac
tors were a trifle sore over the affair,
which had cost them some troublesome
economies.
We alt know such cases. They are
both absurd and disnourtoninar, nnd
yet. since true charity Is mor? blessed
to the tlver than the receiver, and
since It takes nil sorts of people to
make a world, generous minds will go
on giving to the end ot the chapter,
and will not lose by It after ail. Har
per's Basar.
Washington's Rigid Punctuality.
Washington had many admirable
traits worthy of imitation, and one of
them was rigid punctuality. This was
well Illustrated by an Incident during
his visit to Boston a hundred years ago.
Having appointed eight o'clock In the
morning as the hour at which he should
set out for Salem, he mounted his horse
Just as the Old South clock was strik
ing that hour. Tho company of cavalry
Which Was to escort him dbl nnl nrrlvA
till after his departure, and did not i
overiaKe mm till ne had reached
Charles River bridge.
Where Homes Are Cheap.
Horses have been extremely cheap In
parts of the West for some time, but it
is thought bottom prices have been
reached In southern California lately.
A really good mare Bold In San Bernar
dino recently for two dollars, while at
an administrator's sale in Ventura !
County, recently, a horse was sold to a
Mexican boy for fifty cenVi. The boy
bid so high because he wanted the hah
ter which went with the horse.
A Might Kenetlon of the Muicle.
"Is your horse perfectly gentle, Mr.
Dabster?" "Perfectly gentle, sir. The
only fault he has got. If that be a fault,
is a painful habit of extending his hind,
er hoofs now and then." "By extending
his hinder hoofs you don't mean kick,
lng, I hope?" "Some people call It
kicking, Mr. Green, but It's only a Bllghl
reaction of the muscles."
When Hear Trapping Is Profitable.
Bear trapping was a profitable busi
ness In Maine lost year. One .rapper of
Brighton realized 31 on one bear SIS
for the skin, $5 bounty and two gallons 1
of oil at 14 a gallon.
.. A
A J'utrlotlo Hone.
Some putrlotlc but mischievous
youngsters In Lee, Mass., took a neigh- j
boring farmer's white horse one night
recently and painted its head red and
its tall blue.
The Kffrct of the Bun.
Portuguese and Spaniards living neat
the equator in several generations be '
coma almost a black as negroes. j
OBEYED INSTRUCTIONS LITERALLY.
tirrrn Cierman Itrakrman Who Tnok to
MID MimlnrM With a Vengenncn.
A now brakeman of Teutonic descent
hnJ been placed on tho Prairie du Chlen
division of the St. Paul road recently,
and aa his duties Included the calling
of the stations along the line, one of
the older men In the employ of the com.
pany was designated to take charge of
the German. An apt pupil the young
man certainly waa. He did not know
the names of the stations and the old
man told him to listen closely and fol
low his calls. The old man was to ap
pear In the rear of the passenger coach
at the same time the German showed
himself In the head end. Then the old
man would call the station and the new
chap would follow suit. The German
Industriously studied the time card to
familiarize hlmstlf with the stations
during the run and succeeded admira
bly well. The experienced brakeman
would call out "Milton" In the rear of
the coach, and "Milton" would echo
from tho front. And so It went down
through Whitewater, Palmyra, Gene
see, Eagle and Waukesha, the new man
not showing In any way his greenness
at his work. But It seems that at one
point of his education his tutor hnd
signally failed namely, the unusual
call at the Junction points. As a con
sequence he puzzled the novice not a
little at Brookfield. The man of experi
ence bawled out:
"B-r-o-o-k-fl-e-l-d Chang cars
for Water-town, Portage, La C-r-o-s-s-e
S-a-l-n-t Paul M-l-n-n-eapolls,
and all points n-o-r-t-h and w-e-s-t
U-e-a-v-e-r Dam, W-a-u-p-u-n, H-l-pon,
Berl-l-n, Osh-k-o-s-h and Fond du
L-a-c!"
Here was a poser one which the time
card he had so assiduously studied did
not help him to solve. He hesitated for
a moment and then proved equal to the
emergency. Summoning all the power
of his voice to reach above the Ul: of
the train, he yelled:
"S-a-m-e t-i-n-g at this e-n-d."
Milwaukee Wisconsin.
A Khockrd rhllHnthroplnt.
A little boy was crying, and his tears
touched the heart of the charitable In
Mined lady; he was so small and seemed
to be In such distress.
"Don'.t cry, little boy," she Slid,
soothingly. "Dry your eyes and tell me
what the trouble Is. Did some of the
big boys hurt you?"
"No'm," replied the waif, still sob
bing. "Are you sick or hungry 7" she per
sisted. "No'm."
"Did your father beat you for some
thing?" "No'm. but he will." ,
"Oh, that's the trouble, Is It?"
"Yes'm."
"Well, It's a shame," she exclaimed,
angrily. "Why will he beat you?"
" 'Cause I lost 10 cents."
"Did he send you to buy something
with It?"
"Yes'm."
"And you lost It on your way?"
"YeB'm."
"Oh, well, I guess we can fix that,"
she said in her kindly way, as she took
a dime from her purse and handed It
to the boy. "Now he won't beat you,
will he?"
"No'm."
"What did he send you to buy with
it?"
"Beer."
"Beer!" The good lady gasped at tho
thought.
'Yes'm.'
.1 '
"And how did you lose it?"
"Matehin" pennies."
Before she had sufficiently recovered
to demand the return of her dime tho
boy was gone. Chicago Post.
Her Stratagem.
"What Is the matter?" asked one of
Mr. Vlvvles's boon companions. "You
haven't taken the pledge, have you?"
"No. But I'm not looking on the wine
when It's red in the cup, JuBt the same."
"Reformed, have you?"
"Yep. You've heard of a woman'o
marrying a man with the idea of get
ting him to stop drinking. It doesn't
always work; but It did In my case. My
wife Is a stupendously clever woman."
"Made you promise, did she?"
"She didn't have to. Whin I Btarted
downtown tonight, she said: 'I've lost
the latchkey, dear, but It won't make
any difference. You ring the bell and
I'll let you In.' I said, 'All right.'
Only,' she said, 'we'd better agree on
some password, so that when you ring
I can look out of the window and make
sure It Isn't a burglar.' 'Of course,'
eald I. 'What'll the password be?' 'I
have it,' she answered, 'It mustn't be
too simple. You Just say "Irrepressiblo
reprehenslblllty" and then I'll come
down and let you in.' Gentlemen, If I
can't say irrepressible reprehenslblllty
whtn I get home I don't get In, nnd,
moreover, I assume the chances of be
ing taken for a housebreaker. I've pim
ply got to be careful." And he went
over and resolutely seatev. himself next
to the lC3water tank. Washington Star.
A Different Interpretation.
A guileless city man wandered thro'
the country with his rod over his shoul
der. seeking out a promising place to
t f a fly. He soon came to a pond neat
tlu edge of which was a sign that said:
"No fishing." The city man scratched
his head as he gased at these words,
but finally sat down on the shore, and
wa.j surprised at the number of bltea
he got. Pretty soon the game warden
came along and cried out:
"Hey, therel Don't you see that
elgn?"
"Of course I do," answered tho city
man.
"Well," continued the warden, "don't
you see it says: 'No fishing?' "
"Yes; but it's way off. There's bully
fishing here. Just look at all I have
caught." Harper's Round Table.
Crvel Kxa miners,
A reporter for the Cincinnati Tribune
lately overheard a dialogue between
two suburban gentlemen.
"How did your daughter pass her ex.
amlnatlon for a position as teacher?"
asked the- first man.
"PaBs!" was the answer. "She didn't
pass at all. Maybe you won't believe
it. but they asked that poor girl all
about things that happened before sin
was born,"
A Redeeming Feature.
"There is one redeeming feature
about the Dally Blanket Sheet," said
Mr. Newlywed to her husband, "it
measures Just right to cut out a full
tied skirt pattern.'
ARIZONA "CHICKEN FEED."
So Kniall Coin as a Penny Is Scorn!
i nrr.
"Tho men of Arizona have little u.
gnrd for money In small denomlm.
tions, or what Is termed 'chicken
feed,' " said 11. D. King, of Phoenix, at
thcthe Coates. ,"In the older Rtat
when a purchase Is made, exact Chang)
Is usually tendered, and one thing eer.
tain a bill Is not broken if it pos.slliW
can be avoided. In our section any
ordinary purchase Is made simply bj
asking for the article, and when It It
passed across the counter a piece o(
money amply largo to cover the oot
Is thrown down. When change Is madj
the customer carelessly drops it Into
his pocket, apparently without count'
lng It, and goes out without once mwi
tinning the cost of the article. He get!
Just as good a deal as though he had
haggled with the dealer for half an
hour. This custom of throwing dow
a larger piece of money than Is neces
sary Is not followed, as a rule, to ex
hlblt cash, for In Arizona everybody
has money. It Is only to show appar
ent Indifference, nnd Is a mark of liber.
ality.
"it may be said that pennies have
no abiding place In the West, especial
ly In Arizona. Even at the post-olllc
where everything Is supposed to hi
legal tend"r, pennies, two-cent nnd
three-cent pieces are unknown. Cluing
is made to the cent by tho postmasters
but they do It with postage stamps or
postal cards. Nowhere else are odd
pennies recognized, even In tht banks
A cheek drawn for $4. US would be pal
with a bill without a word. The
H.-mo Is true In all the shops ani)
stores; change is made to the nearest
nickel, sometimes only to tho nearest
quarter or dollar. The saying, "lik
care of the pennies,' &c., don't go in
Arizona, as small change anytlili,t
under a dollar Is by most people val
ued only as trash." KansasClty Times
An l'rrentrie Kector.
The Rev. Ralph Tollemache, who han
Just died, was a godson of Queen Vic
toria's uncle, the Duke of York, ami n
leading member of that ancient lmuw
'f the British nobility, of which the
Karl of Dysart Is the head. He inherit
ed U the traditional and hereditary
cra.ine.'ia of the family, and a couple
of years ago was deprived of his rec
tory In Llecestershlre, as well as thf
control of his fortune, by reason of his
extraordinary behavior. Among otliei
things he was wont to do, was to take
wllh him Into the pulpit a large and
shrill whistle, which he blew vigorously
each time he wished to emphasize any
statement he hnd made.
When he read the lessons during di
vine service, he would Invariably walk
thrice around the lecturn before com
mencing and besides this he wore I
Inrge ring on his thumb, which h
claimed to be enchanted He was a
Krundson of the seventh Earl of Dysart,
and leaves a large number of children,
who are noted for the extraordinary ac
cumulation of Christian names with
which be has endowed each of them.
Time his daughter has no less than
16 other Christian names besides, and
his son Lyulph has IS, Including the
names of Cromwell, Odin and Todma.
The other children have been dealt with
In an equally generous manner. The
late Lord Dysart, although possessed
of Incalculable wealth,, spent the last
20 years of his life In the direst penury,
living Ilk a hermit In two dingy roonu
In n side street, oft tho Strand, In Lon
don, never, leaving them and refusing
to see anyone save his lawyer, his
meals being passed through a hole ii
the door.
No Tow Don't Ilullil NriU.
Children who are Ignorant of country
life often make very amusing renrirkJ
on what they see when suddenly Intro
duced to the woods and fields. Two
little girls who have divided their short
lives between the city and the seashore
have been spending this lovely autunm
with an aunt In a mountain village.
Their delight and amazement at what
they saw were sweet to witness, fine
afternoon, in the course of a stroll aloni
a by-road, the party came upon a group
of cows In the act of lying down under
a tree. One of the girls pointed out
their awkward movements, excitedly.
"Are they building their nests?" she
cried.
A Montana Editor's Appeal,
Don't get mad If your visitor's name
does not appear in the personal columa
Perhaps you did not tell the editor; he's
no mind reader. Don't get mad if yout
neighbor's doings are referred to mors
frequently than your own. Your nclfih'
bor uses his mouth. Your modesty may
be keeping you in obBcurity. That's no
dream. A country newspaper man can't
spend all his time on the street and
make three meals a day. If you know
an item of news, hold us up and give It
out of your system. Sixteen to one If
we get it second-handed there will t
a blunder in it. Anaconda Recorder.
The Ilatile of the Giants.
The Battle of Giants was another
name given to the battle at Marlguano
In 1515, between the allied French and
Venetians and the allied Italians and
Swiss armies. The latter were defeat
ed with great slaughter, over 12,000 of
their troops being left on the field. The
victors lost 4.000. The battle was given
this name by Trivalzlo, a soldier an
historian, who waa present
' ' i
The Ilattle of Hanging Rock
The Battle of Hanging Rock wal
fought near a natural feature of scen
ery of that name In South Carolina. Au
gust 6, 1780. The British were defeated
by Sumter. This was the first battle W
which Andrew Jackson took part.
A lUvh lleggar.
Mrs. Gasto, a beggar, whose honrt
burned at Spring Valley, N. Y., had tM
firemen save her mattress, In which
hud hidden J2.000 or $3,000 in bills, be
sides a quantity of coin.
Nluo-Ittered Monosyllable Words
It is said that there are hut seven
nine-lettered monosyllabic words in thl
English language scratched, stretch"!
scrunched, scranehd, fcreeched.
squelched, and staunched.
i i
An Old Toplar.
Dijon, France, has a poplar tree trlt
a record that can be traced to 723 A. B
It is 122 feet high and 45 feet in circum
ference at the base.
Starch.
The grains of corn starch are o"1'
about one-fourth the size of those oi
the starch made from the potato.