SHOCKED BY A WIRE.
Electric Current 1'ritvr. nn I'nwro Menace
o ( hli'iisii rrilml rlnna.
The elusive bannna ppel lins lout Its
usefulness as n iwnns for lowering tho
prlile of mnti, ami will now bo role
pitted tn the sh.iU- of oHivion, elec
trieity luivinir taken Its pliKe.
The other afternoon tlie cabmen sta
tioned alons? South Ci'.iinl street near
the Union depot at Chioajr.i, were fur
nished nny amount of amusement nt
the expense of innocent pedestrians
who were made the victims of electrical
pranks. Purintf the day at least a
half ilnen men who were hurrvinif to
the station were sent sprawling on tho I
sidewalk in frout of 131 South Canal
Bt-eet.
As a belated passenger would hurry
along the old wooden sidewalk, valise
A. LOOK OF PAIN OVERSPREAD HIS FEA
TURES. in hand, he would suddenly utter a
cry of pain, perform a series of contor
tion acts and then land full length on
the wet and muddy boards. Then he
would slowly pick himself up. carefully
examine the walk, shake his head and
jog along in a state of curiosity and ig
norance. Among the interested spectators of
these peculiar actions was Officer Der
rig, of the central detail, who Is sta
tioned at the Union depot. After wit
nessing the downfall of five or six men,
the officer's curiosity led him to make
an investigation.
The oftUer slowly walked over to the
spot with the air of a man who was
about to unravel a deep mystery. lie
began to pace back and forth on the
old wooden sidewalk, and after having
made the trip la safety several times he
began to look at the "cabbies" with a
wink and twirl his rosewood club with
all the confidence of one of the finest.
Finally he strode down the middle
of the walk on the way back to his
jost, confident that the men who had
fallen must have mixed their drinks.
Suddenly one of his brogans descended
on the head of a big, iron spike which
protruded a half Inch above the plank.
A look of pain overspread his features,
a cry of surprise burst from his lips,
and then there was a whirling mass of
blue cloth, brass buttons, tin star and
; rosewood club.
Derrig finally landed on his back, as
had many before him. Struggling to
his feet, he gave a hasty glance at the
sky and then at the sidewalk. For a mo
ment he was dumb, and then turning
.to the roaring cabmen he exclaimed:
"Be gorrahl I wus sthruck be light-
Securing an ax, Derrig tore up a
half dozen planks and then discovered
the cause of all the trouble. Directly
underneath the middle row of spikes
an electric light wire had been strung.
The ends of the nails had worn away
the insulation from the wire and the
.weight of a person above pressed them
against the uncovered wire, forming a
perfect connection. The wet walk
only served to increase the power of
the current, giving tho passing pedes
trian a sufficient shock to throw him
sprawling on the sidewalk.
THEY SELL BANANAS.
How Two Toiing Chicago OlrU Support
ThonuelTM Kloely.
1 Teresa and Bibi Puccettl, two Italian
girls with pleasant brown faces and
black eyes, are fast establishing a pay:
ing banana route on the west side at
Chicago. About a year ago the girla
!
TBKT MAKE THEIB OWN LIVING.
i
Arrived from Italy with their father.
The father was once a sculptor of some
repute in Oenoa, but he lost the use of
this hands in a theater fire. He was
educated, and after his arrival until
(his death, three months ago, he served
as Interpreter In west side courts. Left
almost destitute at his death, the girla
set to work to make a living.
OraMhopper Saved 11 U Life.
James Clone, a farmer of Stonvford.
N. Y., believes grasshoppers saved hlra
from death by an enraged bull. Mr.
Clone was crossing a large, open field
when the bull pursued him. The farm
er ran aa fast as possible, but the bull
aUadlJy gained ou him, and when near
ly exhausted a small clump of bushes
was passed, from which arose a large
cloud of grasshoppers. The insects
' struck the infuriated animal In the faoa
and It turned aside. Mr. Clone eaeaped
trom the field unharmed.
The Kaunas Iden.
YIth much regret we note1 that n
Wichita (Knn.) man has pit into
trouble nbont n kis It is never pleas
nut to hear of n misunderstanding
about a hiss. A ltiss is such a harmless,
necessary thing tho lcsto,.vinT of it
such a simple, innocent, mid pleasant
form of recreation that to have any
port of trouble follow it is discouraging,
to say the least. But in the Kansas
case under consideration the sorrow
that such things should bo is rather
swallowed up In wonder nt certain de
tails of development. The thing has,
of course, got into the courts, or noth
ing would be known about it. Mrs
Wert, who was kissed, Is suing Mr.
Pulliam, who did the kissing, for dam
ages. Realizing, apparently, the utter
absurdity of such a thing as damages
having any possible connection with so
benign a thing as a kiss, the lady's law
yer has fallen back on his legal base of
supplies and put forward the astonish
ing plea that the defendant kissed the
plaintiff in a "loud, boisterous, feloni
ous, malicious, and unseemly man
ner, against the peace and dignity of
the state of Kansas." Now Isn't it hard
luck enough to be hauled up for so
small an act as kissing, without having
a heartless lawyer unload such a lot of
misfit adjectives upon a person' Sure
ly the law could Impose no greater pen
alty than to permit a bookish bar
rister to get his fell work In In such a
manner.
liens In nioomers.
A cure for the bloomer craze has
been found at last. It is the invention
of a shrewd Vermonter, and in the sev
eral instances in which it has been tried
it has worked almost as magically us
magic. The inventor had a wife who
rode a bicycle and who insisted on
wearing bloomers every time she went
out for a spin. Neither protests nor ap
peals nor threats could induce her to
wear another costume. So one day the
husband, with a patience that would
have caused Job to open his eyes, sat
down and made a pair of bloomers for
every hen in tho poultry yard, and
drawing them on the hens called his
wife to look at them. They looked just
like she did, he said, when she was on
the wheel In costume. A little more
graceful, perhaps, but not a bod repro
duction. There were some sharp words
for aimoment, but the woman hasn't
worn bloomers since.
The joys of married life are differ
ently estimated by different people,
and it has been alleged that some of
the sweetest pleasures come in the
"making up" after family jars. On
this ground, opines the New York Sun,
Mrs. Isaac Brewster, of Monroe coun
ty. Fa., has been getting a full meas
ure of satisfaction out of her twenty
two years of wedded life. In that time
she has deserted her husband just
forty-two times. She and Isaae would
disagree about something, and she
would promptly go away, first to her
parents and latterly to her married
children. Forty-two times she was
coaxed back by her disconsolate hus
band, and everything was lovely for a
few months each- time, until the next
outbreak. One time, when they parted
over a custard pie, It cost Isaao two
hundred dollars and the deed to a
house to get his erratic spouse back.
But now she refuses to go back again,
and the courts have been asked to ap
point a guardian for the estate.
It is difficult to understand wherein
science is to any appreciable extent
benefited by the cruel practices of some
experimenters in its interests. Take,
for Instance, a case reported in the
Journal of Zoophlly, which says that
in Philadelphia there is a doctor who
experimented upon one hundred and
forty-one dogs by raising them to a
height and dropping tbem upon ridges
and bars of iron in order to test the
effect of the painful bruises and the
breaking of the baoks which were the
result. There is also a doctor who se
lected a number of dogs and after
twisting their legs over their backs,
thus placing them in an excessively
cramped and unnatural position, sealed
them up in plaster of parls, which pre
vented their obtaining any relief. In
human cruelty and nothing short of it.
It is claimed that fully twenty mil
lion acres of American land are
owned by great land-owners in Eng
land and Scotland. This does not
include the Holland syndicate, which
owns five million acres of grazing land
in western states, nor The German syn
dicate owning two million, acres in va
rious states. This leads us to ask:'
Do Americans own America?
Since the United States government
was organized less than nine hundred
people have served as United States
senators, while of these more than
two hundred had previously been
members of the bouse of representa
tives. a. iiocKiATO tine. newspaper an
. . . - - .
nounces that "scarlet fever of a benev
olent type1 is prevalent in that city.
This is a type that will hardly become
epidemic
. A Pittsburgh girl of sixteen killed
herself a few days ago by eating parls
green because her mother had give
birth to a baby girl and she wanted
brother.
A West Vtmimix man Is so peculiarly
affected by riding on a train that he
am to chain himself to a seat to pro-
vest his jumping out of the car window.
THE COLUMBIAN,
THE RETIRED BURGLAR,
Work Eimlly rrnm-rtitrd In the Tumult of
a Thumlrrnt.oi'tii.
"Spealclpjr of cinches," said tho re
tired burglar to a New York Sun re
porter, "tho easiest, softest, smoothest
snap I ever struck was In a houso In a
small town In Khodo Island. There
was a thunderstorm coming up us I
went along toward this house, nud just
as I got there it began to sprinkle. By
tho time I'd pot inside it wns coming
down pretty hard, and 1 was glad to be
under shelter, for I htldn t brought
any umbrella with me. I hadn't had
any. supper cither, and when I got Into
the dining room I thought I'd get some
thing to eat. The sideboard was
locked and the key carried upstairs,
but n little jimmy opened tho door aa
THE. MOTHER r-VSIIED THE CIUI.PRKJf
INTO THE CLOSET.
easy as a knife would open a pic. I set
out a little snack on the table and sat
down and ate It comfortably, with the
rain pouring down outside. If there's
anything I like it's to hear a storm a
ragin' outside when you're settled down
all snug and comfortable within, t
"But here was something I hadn't
counted. The thunder was roaring
and plunging like a dozen earthquakes
bustin down through the sky, and It
kept the house In a tremble all the
time. I knew nobody could sleep in
that thunder. They'd be sure to be all
awake; but hero I was, and I hated to
lose a night, and after I'd waited a lit
tle and the storm didn't show any signs
of lcttln' up, I thought I'd go ahead and
see, anyhow. The very first room I
looked into upstairs settled the whole
business.
"Over In one corner of this room, be
yond a bed, I saw a women standing in
front of nn open closet door. Two
children hopped out of the bed, and the
mother pushed them into the closet
and then crowded In herself and pulled
the door shut tight. It was all very
simple; husband away, no help; two
children Bleeping in another room,
woke up by thunder, come into their
mother's room, all scared; mother puts
children in closet and gets In herself,
as lots of folks do In thunderstorms.
And then I walk over and turn the key
in the lock and there you are; no
danger of their coining out till the
storm is over, anyway, but just as well
to be sure about it, and then I just
quietly go through tho house. It isn't
big and It doesn't take long, and I come
back before the storm is over and un
lock the closet door again and skip;
and that's all there is to It
BURIED WITH HONORS,
Description of an Imposing Canine Funer
al Held at London.
This Is how Mr. Sims, in the Referee,
christens the true story of an event
which has taken place in London. Mr.
II. J. R. Pope, M. R. C. V. 8.. of No. 43
Addison road, had had for some time
past at his infirmary an aged retriever
dog, sent there to end his days In peace.
Last week the dog was taken for
death, and his mistress was advised by
telegram of the fact. She came at once,
and held the dying dog's paw until all
was finished, and then, the first out
burst of natural grief over, the sorrow
ing mistress immediately sent for a
fashionable West End undertaker to
measure the dead pet for a coffin.
A grave next to the Duke of Cam
bridge's canine family vault in Hyde
Park cemetery was then secured, and,
HELD THE DYINO DOO'8 PAW.
the cemetery authorities were notified
that the interment would take place in
two days.
On the following day the undertak
er's van arrived at the Malson Mor
tuaire, and the coachman and two
bearers came in and brought the coffin,
which was a very handsome one of
solid oak, with brass mountings, and a
silver plate on. the lid, setting forth the
name of the dog, the date of his birth
and death, etc.
The coffin was lined with white satin;
the body reverently covered with a
white cloth, and the deceased dog lay
in state during the rest of the day. The
next morning a hearse drawn by two
fcorses arrived, and the dog was con
veyed to the cemetery, followed by a
mourning coach and his mistress'
brougham with the blinds drawn down,
and the ceremony at the grave was a
most affecting one, many of the faith
ful animal's two-legged friends assem
bling to Join In this last earthly tribute
to his. memory.
ill 111
da
Jl
BLOOMSBURG, PA.
Xs. ATI sg '
JAY!
DROPPED YOUR
m
raxo
PLUG
A GREAT BIG
IO CENTS-
The pot called
1
because the housewife
didn't use
SAPOLI
B. F. Sharpless, Pres. N. U. Funk, Sec,
BLOOMSBURG
LAUD IMPROVEMENT COMPANY
Capital Stock, $30,000.
Plotted
lotted property is in the
1. It includes also part of
tl in desirahilirv fnr
town
ciiuai iu uesuttumiy iur residence TNirnnseti. .
CHOICE LOTS are offered
in a short time.
?U'0
uuio owwcu uii OiUAXiU iUVyll XXI Li X x A X MUjIVX O-
Maps of the town and of plotted property furnished on ap
plication. y r
Call upon or write to the Secretary, or J. 8. Woods, Sales
n-gern,, ur auy memDer 01 uie
BOARD OF
B. F. Sharpless:
C. W. NeaL, A. G.
T tj xv nrr,.
Do vour walla need
papering? If 80,
call on
Willikm S. JSflate,
Exchange Hotel Bldg.,
and see for what
a small amount
you can have it
done. Our stock
is the largest and
most carefull y
selected in town.
The prices suit
the hard times.
William H. Slate,
BOOKS, STATIONERY AND
WALL PAPER.
MISTER! YOU VE
PIECE FOR
the kettle black
C. H. Campbell, Treas.
coming business centre of the
the factory district, and has no
at values that will be doubled
O
E- A. RAWLINGS.
uoaru oi .Directors.
DIRECTORS.
T L Dit ty
Briggs. ' Dr. I. W. Witttta.
' T.
11-19-
FINE LINE OF
WATCHES
at reasonable prices.
Special attention given to reJ '
pairing of
imd Jewelry.
u i
iiauu engraving promptly
dqne.
I I A k U I
VJ VV CI IS.
7
THE LEADING JEWELER,
Main Btret, Mist l Past Office
Grown Acme,
Tho boat burning oil that
can bo made Trom potro
loum.
It gives a brilliant light It will not
moke, the chimneys. It will not chnr the
wick. It hni s high fire teat. It will not
explode. It li pre-eminently a family safety
oil.
We Challenge Comparison with any
other illuminating oil made.
We stake our Reputation, as Refiners
upon the statement that it is
Tlie Best Oil
IN THK WORLD.
ASK YOUR DEALER FOR.
Crown - Acme
:o:
IBS ATLANTIC REFINING CO,
BLOOMSBURG STATION,
BLOOM SEl'FG, TK
THE MARKETS.
BLOOMSBURG MARKETS.
CORKICTID WIIILT. BITAIL rRIClt.
Butter per lb $
Ecgs per dozen
4
32
Lard per lb
Hani per pound
Pork, whole, per pound .06
Beef, quarter, per pound, . . . 07 to .10
Wheat per bushel .70
Oats " " te
Rye " " 65
Wheat flour per bbl 3 85
Hay per ton 13 to $14
Potatoes per bushel .is
a utiiia
Sweet potatoes per peck 15 to .30
Tallow per lb 4J
lurnips " .as
. -
Shoulder "
.11
.C7
.07
.05
.18
.M
3i
oS
.80
75
.75
t.oo
LIS
LIS
LIS
.It
.IO
s
.10
.10
Side meat " "
Vinegar, per qt
Dried apples per lb. . .
Dried cherries, pitted.
Raspberries
Cow Hides per lb. . . .
Steer "'...,
Calf Skin
Sheep pelts
Shelled corn per bus . .
I Lorn meal, cwt.
1 -
gj
Bran,
Middlings
Chickens per 1) new
" " "old
Turkeys " "
Geese " "
Ducks "
COAL.
No. 6, delivered.. 1.40
t ?d SJ' 350
" 4 and s at yard. 3.15
DIALIR IN
All Kinds of Meat.
Beef, Veal, Lamb. Mutton,
Pork, Hams, Bacon, Tongues,
Bclocna. &. Fr nlivarv
' I c ' '
to all parts of the town.
CENTRE STREET,
BLOOMSBURC, PA.
Telephone connection.
COPYRIGHTS.
CAM I nnTtm riTimrf rar
Knapt uirnr snd t 6onMt opmton. writ to
tion .trlotlT aoofldenttel. Tllaadbaak at l-
lurmauou aonoerniM raieata and sow to oa
lain than aant f raa. Xiao a catalogna at litw
Patanu takan tbroncb Mima at Co. vagal,
apaowl ootloala toa MrleattSa Amarlran. aud
thua ai-a brotwht wldai baroratba public IU
oat eoat to Uia Invaotor. Ttaia aptondld fV.
laanad waaklr. alaaaotl, llltutntad. baa bT fat tba
lariaat circulation of an, amentias work lm too
Balidlof Edltloa. Bontblr, UOs ,aar. SMM
opiaa, Ma oanta. Btary number oontalna
tiful plats. La oolora. and bbotoarapba
wnw, witn plana, auablins buildan to abow taa
IM.t dnalani and aaoura ountraota. Addraaa
JliHH i CO, Msw Xohk, 301 BkOXUWAT.
I ..anaiiAl.
Steel Ceilings and
Side Wall Mnisti.
I nUmi. on pillimUon to lbBol MniiftKu
mruiiiMi twnii.w..iu.)rkiW.N
I Alo makot of Llvhtnlnf. 1r sud Rtona-llW
I WCMSMIU UtNUHl uvuviua
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