THE COLUMBIAN, BLOOMSBURG, PA.
CAPRICE RATHER THAN RULE.
Tha Way Name of rrom and Plneet
Arc I'ronoum eil.
Nflmos of irlncps aud persona are pro
jioiiucid nvordlnff to caprice rather
tluiu acvordluK to rule.
Tbf" of yulncy, Mass., ns well
ftS till 1'1U' Of MuaiMCriUaprtS KI'IHT-
aily, sn.v iuinay, while western poaplu
nay Quinsy.
In ftio name way tho fellow-citizens
of Uiuertmn mid Thoreau would have
!u flratiMitl If any onu had pronoun
ced tin: naino of Iholr rywu hs every
oik pronounces the common word
which is spelt In tho naino way. "Wo
live. In ii'U(! and concord with our
fuJlghhor." thry uilifht have unid "but
wo uud our neighbors live In Concud."
In other words, tho Inhabitants of
IXttieord. Max., (rlvo the second o an
oUscittv sound and omit the r alto
geriier. ThoiKinds of Companion roaders
Imre bf-eii tiitiKht at iHiool to say Ar
kaiiHiis. orlier tlioiif.'inds. no doulit,
have Iilvu tatiK'lit to say Arkiuix.iw.
hlch piMuuuuluiioii is correct?
'J'Wf question was proposed to Kepro
K'ntative Ili.-lciurlil.'!' some tlmo ago,
ami was mmwered In favor of Arkau
iww. The name was fornu'ly applied
Arkunso and Arknuvsa, he says. The
filial s wild added by the French, but
.Vis jtilent.
In the State Itself. Mr. Itnckinridto
r.dds, It Is only visitors and new
ivmora who say Arkansas. At the
name time it sooius to be true that
u--.i;e lias not always been uniform.
When Millard Fillmore was vice
president of the United States, Mr.
Kivckiurldite says, the two Arkansas
senators disagreed as to the pronun
ciation of the name, taich Insisted
that he was correct aud Mr. Fillmore,
n prudent of the Senate, coinprom
i'l the mailer by recognizing one as
"the ifi luleman from Arkansas," and
the iMiir ,is "the irentleman from Ar
kansas." Yoiirli's Companion.
rimrgei! High for Hla Work.
Kvery mifu manufacturer has nt
t.y hi'd t his force expert locksmiths
v ii'W duties consist In opening safes
which Qiave jwttun out of order.
Many of the accidents to safes occur
from the gross carelessm-Hs of their
owners, and at times tin? honest safe
crickers eujoy a (pilot laugh at the
oxpeusa ..f a group of bank officers or
Hit proprietor of some Important es
tablish ment.
Not long since a large manufacturer
telegraphed to a New York safe maker,
requesting that a man be sent at once
to his place of business, a town about
fifty miles from the city.
Upon reaching his destination the
ci4rt, wiuh his kit of tools, repaired
to the establishment, and was Inform
ed that the vault, nn old-fashioned af
fair, which locked with a key and
which contained the safe and nooks
Of the coucern, could not be opened.
The man examined the lock and then
the key, opened his kit, took out a bit
of wire and began to dig a mass of
dirt, dust and lint out of rhe key. Then
ho Inserted It in the lock and, while
the proprietor with u sickly smile look
ed on, turned the implement and open
ed the dxr.
"What's your charge?" asked the
manufacturer.
"Fifty dollars," replied the exjiert.
DieH anyone know you ure In
town?"
"No."
"Well, then, here's sixty dollars," re
marked tlie manufacturer. "I'll give
you ten dollars extra if you'll take the
first train liack to New York without
tefllng anyone the price I've paid to
'have a man dig dirt out of a key for
me." New York Herald.
Lad leu Flrnt.
. 'A class of boys in a boarding school
were being examined In scripture.
"Wbat can you tell me almut
MonesV" asked the Inspector. "What
Hort of a man was he?"
"Please, sir, he was a gentleman,"
piped forth a palefaced, bright-eyed
lad of eleven or therealwut,
"Oenfk-man!" repeated the Inspector,
witti a look of surprise. "What do you
niflJMi?"
The little boy promptly replied:
"Please, sir, when the daughters of
Jethro went to the well to draw water
the shepherds came and drove them
away, and Moses helped the daughters
of Jethro, and said to the shepherds,
'I-iadiea first, please, gentlemen.' "
Good News.
Cbinmie Deacriptlon of the Piano.
'A Chinaman, lately returned from a
trip to Europe, treated his country
men to the following description of the
piano:
"The Europeans keep a largo four
lepged beast, which they can make to
sing at will.
" man. or more frequently a wo
man, or even a feeble girl, nits down
in front of the animal and steps on its
tail, wlille at the name time striking
its white teeth with his or ber Angers,
when the ereaturo begins to sing.
"The singing, though much louder
than a bird's, Is pleasant to listen to.
"The beast does not bite, nor does It
move, though it Is not tied up." Das
Neue Bltttt.
Pathetic.
'A lady vho had spent a great deal
of time in trying to teuvh her servant
girl to make a good drawn butter
gravy, and who found no little scold
ing necessary to accomplish It, called
Bridget Into the dinner table one day,
and said severely:
"Bridget, this drawn butter gravy is
actually bitter!"
"Is that so, ma'am?" asked Bridget
sorrowfully.
"It is, Hrldget. Now, how do you
account for It?"
"I do' know, ma'am; but I do be
thinking, ma'mni, rtiat I dhropped a
tear In til it!" Youth's Companion.
He Wanted to Know.
"Wonderful country!" exclaimed the
Kansas man. "Wliy, when I moved
out here it was forty miles to Brown's,
my nearest neighbor."
"And now far is It to Brown's now?"
put In the eastern man.
Different Kind.
Miss Plnkerly Do you believe in
splrttualliim, Mr. Tutter?
Tuttwr Weil. I don't know, Miss
Clara. I don't think an occasional
drink hurts any man.
Takluf a Mean Advantage.
"What do you do when your wife
rots at you for coming home late?"
mki the first deal and dumb mau.
"Turn out the gas," responded the
rtkar.-T&re.
PEOPLE Of NOTE.
Mrs. U. 8. Ornut has an annual in
come of I24.0UO.
The mysterious veiled lady with the
Coxlnii army U naid to be no other
than Mrs. Lucy Parsons, widow of
the Chicago Anarchist
(lovornor Lewolling has the reputa
tion of bring, among other varieties,
a baseball crank. And he has a habit
of getting oil his base.
Mr. Aubrey Beardsley, the Artist
whose fantastic drawings are Just
now a "fad" of English bookmakers,
is not much over twenty years old.
Walter Bosant Is a chronic, dyed-in-the-wool
optimist, aud he is said to bo
more proud of the fact than Jhe Is
over all his literary successes.
President Harris, of the Maine Stato
college, Is one of the youngest men In
charge of a groat educational institu
tion in the country, being only thirty
years of age.
Mrs. Kate Douglass Wlggln. the nit
thoivs. is a Phlladelephiau by birth,
who was iMlueated in New Knglaud,
transplanted to California, and then
tumo back to New York.
Francis Murphy, the temperance re
former, appears to be as popular and
i-flective as ever. He is now conduct
ing a most successful series of tem
perance meetings in Boston.
The trusiees of tho estate of Lady
Henry Somerset, the leader of tho
Women's Christian Temperance move
ment in England, are petitioning tho
courts for an injunction to restrain
her from closing all the saloons on
her estate.
Tho late (Jen. Early, wliose pictur
esque profanity caused him to bo
known during tho war as "Lee's Bad
Old Man." was In his later years, ac
cording to file testimony of u Ulch
mond friend, "a dally reader nud
thorough student of the Bible."
Mrs. Susan Stuart Frackleton, of
Milwaukee, who has attained dis
tinction us a potter, aud is president
vt the National Leaguo of Mineral
I 'alnters, Is author of a work that Is
used as a text book In the South Ken
sington Art Museum Library.
Abraham Lincoln's autograph. It is
said, has liecu stolon by autograph
huuters from every paper on tile in
the county courts of Illinois. The
abstractions have been made, it is
said, by connivance of the custodians
of the papers In very many instances.
Only 0110 man in the history of tho
Senate, Thomas H. Benton, of Mis
souri, served longer than Justin S.
MojTill. of Vermout, who has been a
member of that foody nearly thirty
years. Benton was elected October 2,
1820, and retired March 4, 1851.
Gail Hamilton regrets to eeo women
engaged in an effort to secure the bal
lot for themselves. She hxiks upon It
as a "movement backward toward
men and mastodons, the miocene hip
Iiorlon and eocene anehitherium."
whatever that may signify.
Mr. Munro Ferguson, according to a
Scotch newspaper, said tliat after
prodding Mr. (Jladstone on the sub
ject, the ex-premier said: "My dear
sir. I might as well undertake to re
place the first man m the garden of
Eden as to carry home rule for Scot
land." Mrs. Waite, the wife of the gover
nor of Colorado, is forty-eight years
of age, while her husband is sixty
nine. She was a widow and he a
widower When they marled. She is
Interested In the Woman's Christian
Temperance Union, ami thinks there
Is no one like her husband.
The paper on which letters to Queen
Victoria are written must not be fold
ed. No communication which bears
evidence of having been creased will
ever iind its way into her majesty's
hands. The proper method is to wrlio
on thick, glossy white paper and to
dispatch the mloaive lu au envelope
which fits it.
The latest royal convert to cycling
is the king of tho Belgians, who now
takes an hour or two's exercise regu
larly every morning on a tricycle in
ono of the avenues adjoining Lakeon
palace. For some tlmo past Ioixld
II. has suffered from luuieni iu one
leg, for which massage and various
other remedies have been tried In
vain.
Unity church, Cleveland, Ohio, la
probably the oldest church in tha
world that has as pastors two wo
men. They are the Bev. Marion Mur
doch and the ltev. Florence Buck.
They are highly-educated women, hav
ing finished their education at Oxford
University, England. They are co
pastors of the church, and have been
remarkably successful.
Bismarck has lost none of his old
time gallantry. It was arranged by
the deputation of ladles Who tersoii
ally visited him to present the 40
bottle of finent Rhenish wines con
tributed from Baden, House and tho
Palatinate that each of them should
kiss his hand upon liclng presented,
but the old soldier kissed them in
stead, and not upon their hands,
either.
Sir Julian rauneeCote. the British
ambassador at Wlngton, has gone
against the custom of generations,
which prescribed that, as French Is
the language of diplomacy, the cards
of all foreign representatives, no mat
ter of What nation. Kliould bo en
graved in the French language. His
cards are inscribed simply, "Sir Julian
Tauucefote, representative of her Brit
annic majesty."
E. A. Abbey, the well-known artist
illustrator, makes his original black
and white picture many times larger
than the illustration of which it Is
tho busld, but, unlike most illustrators,
he is able to sell his originals at high
prices iu Great Britain. He Is one of
the few Illustrators who always have
their originals returned by tho pub
lishers after the engraved copies have
been prepared. The popularity of his
originals has led him to paint less
with reference to reproduction than to
first effect.
WISE WORDS FOR WOMEN.
Tt to Just as well that there hi no
marrying or given in roarrlugo in
heaven. There Is no record of any
divorce court there.
What the average woman most needs
Is more sleep, loss hurry, fewer calls
and quieter "home lira
The miller tnoth U retting ready for
her seasonis work. Get ready to head
ber off. Boa will do more damage In
a month than yon can repair in a
yur, ,,-
FLYING FUN.
".Totinny." nkl the teacher, a
Jackass a bipod or a quadruped?"
"I'l'Hise, sir," said Johnny, "that de
pends on tho Jackass." Life.
"I'vo never had the courage to pet
married." "Haven't, eh? What's your
business?" "Oh, I'm only a llon-tam-w."
Philadelphia Uecord.
His mother "You ought to feol
ashamed of yourself, ftr fighting little
Johnny Naybors." Tommy "I do,
mamma, bo licked mo." Chicago Re
cord. He (exhibiting sketch) "It's the beat
thing I ever did." Sim (sympathetic
allyi "Oh, well, you mustn't let that
discourage you." Boston Home Jour
nal. Wife "Isn't K funny? Prof. Garner
says the gorilla only speaks eight
words." Husband "Nothing strange,
ho hits live or six wives." Cleveland
l'laiudealer.
First lady "And the last thing that
Henry did was to give me a kiss."
Stvolid lady "Indeed; I should think
Mint Is about tlie last thing he would
do." Tit-Bits.
"At what time In life do you con
sider man In his prime?" "When he
Is neither young enough nor old enough
to want to write poetry." Washington
Star.
"What do the girls call that club of
yours ?" "The Analytical." "I I'm.
What do you analyse?" "Other peo
ple's reputations, mostly." Washing
ton Star.
"How many ladies have you Invit
ed?" "Twenty-five." "But I thought
you were going to invite fifty?" "But
consider tho f.-whlou in clifves." New
York Press.
Mrs. Winks "Dame Fortune 1ms
leeu smiling on Nolg1ilor Hicks. I
lienr." Mrs. Jluks "Oh. the horrid old
wretch, and his poor dar wife not
dead a month." Chicago Inter-Ocean.
"People don't die very often over
here, do they?" iuqulml the smart
New Yorkr. "No, only once," replied
the Phlladelphlan. And there was an
intense silence. Philadelphia Uecord.
Maude "Why don't Laura marry
Dick Hobson? I thouglit she liked
him." Clara "She does, but she nays
it Hlmll never be said of her that she
was Hobson's cQioico." New York
World.
Mrs. Brown (nndg1ng Mr. Brown,
who snores with his mouth open)
"William, you'd make less noise If
you'd keep your mouth shut." Mr.
Brown (only half awake) "So'd you."
-Life.
"Mandy, did you read ttiat notice on
the counter. 'Your choice for fifteen
cents' " Maudy "Land sakes! ;
but it looks like an awful price to ask
for them clerks." Chicago Inter-Ocean.
"Marriage." remarked the professor,
Vwas a rite practised by the an
cients " "And bachelorhood," Inter
rupted a maiden of forty, "Is a wrong
practised by the moderns." Harper's
Bazur.
"Did your late boarder succeed in
removing all his effects?" "I ahould
say not," rejoined tho landlady. "I
don't suppose I can ever get the cigar
ette smell out of the curtains." Chi
cago Tribune.
"Is your daughter Improving in her
painting?" Mother "Well, I should
say so. Her last picture was so goinl
that only three of the family failed to
guess what It was." Chicago later
Ocean. She (In affright) "Oh, Tom, why do
you make such awful faces nt me?"
Ho (contritely) "I can't help it, dour.
My eyeglasses are falling off and I
don't want to let go of your hands."
Boston Home Journal.
"Billy Bllven asked Miss Parselgh
how old she was," suid one girl to an
other. "Did she get angry?" "No;
she was flattered. She thought she
must look very young or he'd never
have dared." Washington Star.
At the Chess Match. Dr. Schweitzer
"Playing chess Is like making love
the knight tries to take tho queen: you
are mated by the bishop; then off to
tho castle in the air aud, alal every
thing Is In pawn!" Hello.
"Don't sit on this Iwneh with mo.
George, ilen8e!" said Maud. "Wny
not?" asked George. "Because it is
only strong enough for one," said
Maud. "Then, I say, Maud, can't wc
bo made one?" suggested George. -Harper's
Bazar.
"Do you think that woman is fickle?"
said Klddlns. "Certainly not." replied
Kaddlns. "You can alwayj depend on
her. She announces that she will do
as she pleases, and keeps her word
rel I glou sly .' ' Wa shlngtonfetar.
Banks "What did her father say
when you told him that you wanted
to marry his daughtttr?" Rivers
"Well, he didn't absolutely refuse, but
ho imposed a very serious condition."
Banks "What was It?" Rivers-"Ho
said he would see mo hanged lirst."
Brooklyn Life.
The Power of Gold.
He loved her. ..' 2,
She loved him. ' i , -.
They loved each other.
But her father objected becniwe the
young man was almost a total stran
ger, Tho time had come when the youth
must ask the father for his daughter,
and he feared to go to him.
He held a long conference with his
beloved.
He told her he did not want to usU
her father.
"George, dear," he asked in a trem
ulous whisper, "how much are you
worth?"
"A million dollars, darling," lie re
pponded proudly.
Her face shone in the twilight.
"Then you don't have to ak him."
she said with a simple trust. "Lot
him know that and he wilt ask you."
And Georgo gave the old man a tip.
-ue trout rrec rresa.
i
Tommy' Amiable Recreations,
His Mother Who are you mopmg
around the house tor Tommy? Why
don't you go over and pkiy with Char
ley Pinafore?
Tommy 'Oauee I played with Char
ley yeaterday, and I don't a'poae he's
well enough yet Cbiougo Record.
Uncomplimentary.
Lirrte boy Carry yet bundle, m!tftv
Traveler What do you want for tho
Job?
Little boy-Yer phottgraph.
Traveler My photograph ?
Iictie boy I want sum thin' ter
fr'tftiem me sister Aon. Hallo.
ELKHART CARRIAGE
nave ol4 to enaniaer for At yenri,
Mln tumo the dealer inif1t. We era tha
Olriratserf I.r.t mnnufai'tnmrn In Amer
ica inlllne Vohlt-li'H find lUrncfn thm wt hlp
with prlvllcft-A to evnnitnA bof ore nnf mnnCT l
paltl. We pay f roivht huth wny nit not nofnc
iorr. Werrnnt for 4 rr". Why piF n nirent 111)
to ISO to order fur ymir Wrila ymir own order.
Rnxmi free. Wa teka all risk of Cttiuicu in
abtppius
WHOlttALl PRICES,
Spring W;one, 931 to BSC inimnM
nieaMiifurioot- t&. Surrey, $89 to I00
Kim an tell for lioo to till. Top Buggies,
37.90, aa flneai enld fr f PhaMona,9o4
to ioo. Farm Wagons, Wagonettes.
Milk Wagons, Delivery Wagons ni (toed
Carts. imi.M rua Hk.t, ols a iiui.dhkv
Ho. 37. Barmy UarneM.
Bczks $23.50 '
llerM ljT Reekie
MMMrt JS(. iy ill linear.
auiranl Tin -y!ii isaa
No.TU'-i, Top Biiiyy.
.03
Mo. 1, Karm
KiniMS S.IDDI
r"'M. eft for ranh
etamaa to pa pitace
K 1, r ural Wagun,
S43
"Where dirt gathers, waste rules."
Great saving result from
the use of
SMP0L1O
THE POSITIVE CURE.
I ELY Wai'HER3, M Warren 6U ttetr York. IMce so eta.!
told about manure won't raise paying crops. Baugh' manure is all
manure. A ton of good manure costs no more than a ton of poor
manure. Write for samples and information.
BAUGH & SONS COMPANY,
Manufacturers of RAW BONE MANURES,
20 South Delaware Avenue, - Philadelphia.
I AM NOW A
MAN!
Ohieaso. Oct 8,1PM.
" I wu troubled with miMioDa
nd Tavricocelu. and bad bef n
Mxually weak tor wfio jr.
Uurlna th I ant fonr vnara I
tried evary nmdr that wu told At HI wa.
and not no relief for any of mf
trouble until I took CALTH08-H tared and
revtarad ma aad I ata aaw a au,"
IK timet rreai of UiMiaadaaf lIUiaaclTd br m.1
Address VON MOHL CO.. Sole
I...I.M.,. .
B. R Shakpless, Pres. N. U. Funk, Sec. C. IT. Campbell, Treas.
CBLOOMSBURCO
LAND IMPROVEMENT COMPANY
Capital Stock $30,000.
Plotted nrooertv ia in the
town. t It includes also part of
CHOICE LOTS are offered
in a short time.
No such opportnuity can be had elsewhere to make money
Lots secured on SMALL MONTHLY PAYMENTS-'
Maps of the town and of Dlotted
plication. 1
Call upon or write to the Secretary, or J. S. Woods. Sales
Agent, or any member of the Board'of Directors.
BOARD OF DIRECTORS.
B. F. Shakpless; J. L Dillon-.
C. W. Nlal, A. G. Briggs, Dk. I. W. Willits,
Dr. H. v. McReyxolds, N. Xj. Fdxk.
i 1-19-tf
SPECIAL SALE
0". C3-. "WELLS'
during month of Julv and August.
Eyes examined free of charge at
J". Gr. 'WELLS',
JEWELER AND OPTICIAN.
Repairing watches, clocks and jewelery, a specialty. .
and HARNESS MFG. CoJ
Jio. T31, Borrcy.
ho.TV, Head Wagon.
$55
fane,
l
4S.SO.
llmep.
KS a.d FLY 2KKT9. Klkhart Bicycle. Stn.wheeia,
wit nnlrr. Hrml 4e. la pneumatic Urea, weldle.e
W-pagc otulivun Heel tnl.luit, amp lorKlnna.
kitrtu W. B. PRATT, Sec'y, ELKHART,. IND.
hong
Tales
We will (Mif1 vmi iim mar.
velotifi French pieparation
CALTH08 free, by Healed
mail, and a legal Kuaraiitce
that Calthos will
OTAD All niM-liarae and
w w as wvajie Hats
RESTORE
Leal Vlfor.
Use it$ pay if satisfied.
American Aaents. Clnolnnntl. n.
- ,
the factory district, and has no
at valnps fhnf. to!U ha i.ui.i
of gold and steel glasses at
owk Marc I
Do you want u
fiSjo ?
Do yon want ait
mnt .m. . :
Do you want a
Do you want anv kind
of a MUSICAL IN
STRUMENT? Do you want SHEET
MUSIC?
If so, do not send your mon
ey away from home, but deal
with a reliable dealer right
here, who will make things
right, if there is anything
wrong.
For anything in this line
the place to go is to
3, Scilteer's,
Ware-rooms, Main Street he
low Market.
THE MARKETS.
BLOOMSBURG MARKETS.
COXBf 0TBD WBIILT. RETAIL MICKS.
Butter per lb $ .20
Eggs per dozen 18
Lard per lb , 12J
Ham per pound .15
Pork, whole, per pound 07 to .oi
Beef, quarter, per pound, . . . c6 to .08
Wheat per bushel 70
Oats " " .55
Rye " " 65
Wheat flour per bbl. 3.00
Hay per ton 16. 00 to 1&.00
Potatoes per bushel, old 100
" " " new.... 1.25
Turnips " " 25
Onions " " i.eo
Sweet potatoes per peck 25 to .40
Tallow per lb .04
Shoulder " ' 12
Side meat " 10
Vinegar, per qt .07
Dried apples per lb oS
Dried cherries, pitted ."i
Raspberries 12
Cow Hides per lb .0
Steer 03
Calf Skin 40 to .30
Sheep pelts .60
Shelled corn per bus 60
Corn meal, cwt 2 0
Bran, " 1.00
Chop " 1. 20
Middlings " 1.10
Chickens per lb .1'
Turkeys " ' .i
Geese " " .10
Ducks " ..'.",".'.'.' .....
Coau
No. 6, delivered M
" 4 and s " 3 5
" 6 at yard a-S
" 4 and 5 at yard 3 i
PARKER'S
UAIP BALSAM
PrumuiM a Jasuriftul frowtn.
VTr aftUU to KMtor v
a. 1.- v... v. r.i 1 OalQT.
aaair W a vai ivum i T,,,,,,
MNiVJrVJI'U
WU ).,., WiliJ,, IjHlixaaaoa, Faia,Taalnll"-"
1-U i I.
0
v j
1