CREDULITY OF MAN.
TWO GOOD STORIES ILLUSTRATING
A BROKER'S THEORY.
Bams Men Will Relieve Almost Anything
Without Logical Investigation If Some
oody They Happen to Know Appears to
Be In Karnrnt.
They wandered from subject to sub-
jectin a listless way over their coffee
and cigars, as men often do when they
bare enjoyed a good dinner, until the
broker got on his favorite hobby the
crage man s credulity. His companion,
a lawyer, disagreed with him, and that
t once started thom on a lively nrgr
Jnont. After a few minutes of general
owcussion the broker said:
"Well, I'll give you an instance. It is
pretty good story anyhow, and per
fectly true, almost incredible as it seems.
In the town whero I was born there lives
an old river captain named Stewart, who
is a great practical joker. The proprie
tor of one of tho two hotels in the place
a rather pompous and conceited old
man. Stewart walked into the offlco of
the hotel one day a few years ago, and
drawing out a one dollar bank note asked
the proprietor if he could change an
Ievcn dollar bill. The old follow said
and took the bill, which, sure
enough, had tho number eleven in tho
earners, and just glancing at it handed
the amount In change to Stewart.
"The joker had added another figure in
ink to the numbers on the bill, and as
tho proprietor did not like to acknowl
edge that he had never seen an eleven
dollar bill before he had only glanced at
It casually before putting it in the
drawer. Stewart walked out of the ho
tel and told all the men he met about the
Joke.
"About fifteen minutes after Stewart
went away a man walked in and said to
the proprietor:
'Mr. Kennedy, I understand that you
have an eleven dollar bill here. May I
took at It? I never saw one.'
"Kennedy produced It, and the man
Barreled over it for several minutes.
Before he got through examining it an
other man walked in and asked to see
the bill, and then another and another.
Finally Kennedy's curiosity became ex
cited, and he thought he would see what
the bill really looked like. He saw at
enco how it had been 'fixed,' and his
face was a study. The boys shouted
with laughter, and the old fellow had to
acknowledge that the cigars were on
him, and ho set them up like a man."
"Hum! that was funny," commented
the lawyer.
"Well, here's another instance," said
the broker. "Stewart went to a picnic
one day with some men, and one of them
lad on a brand new hat he had just
bought in tho city. It was an almost
white derby, and it at once attracted
Stewart's attention.
"'Well,' ho said, going up to the
Ttmng man, 'you've got one of those new
nats, have you? Let's look at it?
"The fellow took it off with some show
f pride and handed it over for inspec
tion. I saw one of them hats the other
iay in the city,' said Stewart to the lit
tle group of men who had gathered
around him, 'and I hod half a mind to
get it, but as I was in a hurry I didn't
stop. They are something entirely now.
They don't burn, you know. I'd like to
have that hat. What'll you take for it?
'I don't want to sell it,' answered
the owner, grinning with pleasuro at
being tho object of bo much attention. 'I
didn't know it was fireproof though.
Are you sure about it?'
" Oh, yes,' replied Stewart confident
ly. Sell it to me and I'll show you.'
" 'No, if you're sure I'll try it myself.'
And the young countryman walked over
to a wood fire, followed by the crowd of
men who had been gaping with wonder
at the reported qualities of the new hnt.
" 'How will I put it in? he asked Stew
art, who stood near by with a look of in
tense interest on his face.
44 Oh, chuck it right in. It can't hurt
it, replied the joker.
"So the innocent victim threw his hat
into the fire, which of course made short
work of it. The man's face was con
vulsed with rage and astonishment, and
bis temper was not improved when the
crowd of men burst into a roar. He
looked around for Stewart, but that
gentlemun had discreetly disappeared."
"Oh. come off! Go and tell that to
the marines as your 'experience.' You
can't make ine believe such fairy sto
ries," said his auditor.
"Those stories are perfectly straight;
I knew the men myself." New York
Tribune.
I'lceas of Conscience.
Professor rainier, of Harvard, discuss
ing the teaching of morals in the public
schools, says that excess of conscience
has desolated New England liko a
scourge. Conscientiousness becomes a
moral disease and takes the place in the
spiritual life of nervous prostration in
the physicul life. People who are always
fingering their motives, and unwhole
somely preoccupied with directing their
acts, lose spontaneity, sense of propor
tion. Bat what is more important to
human society is their tendency to be
come bores, whose virtues are worse than
their vices. A better rule of conduct is
that of a person who says, "I've made
reasonably sure that my instincts are all
right, so I let my nets take care of them
selves." New York Evening Sun.
A Hhrowd Holiness Mun.
First Manager Somo prima donnas
want the earth.
Second Manager That is so. I once
engaged ono who demanded all the re
ceipts of the house, but still I mado
money.
"How did you make out to do that?"
"I married her when tho season was
over." Texas Sittings.
I nnil llecullection.
She You haven't brought mo u box of
candy since we were married.
He Yes, but think of the tons I
brought you before we wero marriod.
New York Weekly,
THE FLY EATING PLANT.
A Cnrlons Operation of a Vegetable De
vouring Animal t.lle.
One species of the droseahas its leave
rounded, while the other has them elon
gated, but both alike havo them reddish
in color and covered with short hairs oi
filaments. At the end of each of these
hairs there is nn enlarged gland which
secretes a tiny drop of what appears to
bo harmless dew. Harmless, however, the
liquid is not, for to most insects, osjhv
cially small files, tho drosca is a most
insidiously baited trap. Tho liqtiJJ is in
reality a sweet, sticky substance, mid if
the very smallest fly does but touch it
ever so lightly it sticks there and dies.
Tho manner in which the plant after
ward actually digests tho bodies of thi
rties it entraps is interesting in tho ex
tretne.
Within a short time of tho capture of
a fly so excessively sensitive are the
glands all the filaments growing around
the one which has made the capture com
mence to bend inward, covering the
luckless insect until it is securely within
the grasp of the relentless plant. Each
gland then pours out upon the body a
digestive liquid, not altogether unlike
the gastric juice of animals, and in the
course of a day or two the fly in com
pletcly digested, the nutritive parts have
been wholly absorbed by tho plant and
the filaments have lcnt back to their
original position, ready to mako another
capture upon the first opportunity.
If, however, tho substance caught by
the leaf is of an indigestible nature.
such as a grain of sand or a piece of
stick blown by the winds on to the
glands, the leaf docs not remain closed
more than a few hours. The number of
insects thus caught must be very great
The plants themselves are very abun
dant in most upland bogs. Each plant
has five or six leaves, and as many as
thirteen dead flics have been found on a
single loaf.
Curiously enough, Darwin, whose re
searches into the subject were of a most
exhaustive and interesting nature, found
that the leaves on his plants were killed
when he gave them a surfeit of cheese
and raw meat. The excessively sensi
tive nature of tho glands almost sur
passes conception. Darwin found that
tho absorption of only the l-20,000,000th
part of a grain of phosphate of ammo
nia or thereabout was sufficient to cause
the filament bearing the gland to bend
toward the center of the loaf. Good
Words.
Good Advice on the Subject of II a U.
Some one has said that not one man in
a dozen knows how to wear a dress coat,
and it is quite as true that a large num
ber of individuals do not have any idea
how to wear a hat. One man con wear
his hat at the back of his hutA anil InnV
well dressed, whilo another having his
nai in tnat position would look as though
he wero recovering from a protracted
round of dissipation. It is just the same
with the other positions, on the top of
the head, on either side or drawn over
the forehead. It is knowing how to wmr
a hat which makes it look well, and the
knowledge often enables the poor man
to look moro drossy in a cheap hat than
his richer neighbor in a ranch more cost
ly one.
The time the knowledge is a iwvino-
one is when buvine a hat. A irood huIm.
man will take care that n customer gets
a nat tnat will nt him when worn in the
position which is most becoming to that
individual, but unless this in taken mm
of by either purchaser or salesman there
win do mue satisfaction from the pur
chase and the hat will tirobablv blew of?
at the smallest provocation. A but that
fits and is worn riirht seldom h.n nfr
no matter how high tho wind may bo.
au xouis uiooe-uemocrat.
Living In Chambers.
Within late Tears a new stvleof house
keeping has come in. It is a step fur
ther than the "flat." Besides it is much
more swell to live in "chambers" than
to live in a fiat. It is just the thing for
young married people. They take a
suite of two or three rooms and bath.
There is no kitchen. Thov furnish thn
rooms to please themselves, and have of
course their own latchkey, just as if it
were a flat. The houso has an offion
down stairs a Brood deal liko a hotel.
Here mail, etc. , is received. A reception
room is nrovidod down staira. w1m
guests wait whilo their cards are brought
to you.
Tho suites are all sunnlied with Vinlla
A ring brings a boy, as at a hotel. You
can get ice water or stationery as at a
hotel. You can have them "rinir a mm.
senger" or send a telegram. A cafe down
stairs supplies meals as you want them.
Tho house sunnlios chambermaid servic
if you want it. A more complete way
or living who could conceive? Wash
ington Post.
Sprang from II an tern.
Traditions and folklore iimnno- thm
people of mountainous Kentucky are
evanescent and vary widely in different
localities. It anneara that th nam ilrt
are sprang in part from tho early hunt
ers wno came into tho mountains when
game was abundaut, Bport unfailing and
livinir ehoan. Aunnir them nnw am
still hunters, who know tho haunts of
bear and deer, needing no dogs. Even
yet they prefer wild meat even "pos
sum" and "coon" and groundhog to any
other. "Blue Grass Region of Ken
tucky."
A Tender Heart.
Little Johnny I guess I'll iret rid of
that dog I found. Ho's too much of a
tighter. He's always hurtin other dogs.
Fond Mother My littlo cherub does
not like to see tho poor dogs hurt, I
know.
Littlo Johnny No'm, 'causo some of
the other dogs is owned by bigger boys
man i am. uooajsows.
KtlrrliiE Him Up.
Hutibnnd My physician tolls me I
must have a complete change of scene.
I don't know but I'll have to run over to
Europe.
Wife That tsn t necesnary. dear: iust
take a day off and help me on my shop
ping. Cloak Review.
Great Reduction in Winter Goods.
A big mt m prices off Winter obds that
must be cleared mit to make way for
our Large Spring purchases. Call audi
be convinced tliat you cam buy a Win
ter OYEICOAT or SUIT for less monk
ey than ever before. For tlie next 3
days we will show yon genuine
B Jl. IR, C3- .A. 1 3ST s.
Our Line is smaller than it ivas, although there is still a, lare Stock
to select from. Don't miss the opportunity to secure a BARGAIN from
the old OLD RELIABLE CLOTHING HOUSE of
D. LOWENBERG.
THE "MAN WHO SMILES."
"There is a man in our town"
He's not so wondrous wise,
But in selecting goods for sale,
The BEST he always buys.
He has a line of IMPLEMENTS
With which no fault is found,
But through the Country far and wide.
Their praises still resound.
Farm wagons of the "Keystone" make ;
The finest grade on Earth
One glance at which will serve to show
Their undisputed worth.
GRAIN, BARK,
AGRICULTURAL IMPLEMENTS AND
REPAIRS.
BLOOMSBURG, PA.
RELIABLE
Comes to the front with the
LARGEST ASSORTMENT
AND
MAKING AND FITTING
.OF THE.-.
BScst, the newest t&tscl Most Stylish, Lowest in
Price ; sm3 to prove Satisfaction is
obib' 13 ml envoi
The best value for Money is to buy your
Clothing, Hats, Shirts, Neckwear, Trunks and
Valises of
Corner oi Main and Centre Streets, BLOOMSBURG, PA.
miExeEL&BD mmmmQ made
TO QRBEE.
Largest Clothing and Hat House iri' Columbia and Montour Counties
D. W. MIT MEN.
SEEDS, FLOUR
FEED, BALED HAY, Etc.
CLOTlfll M D
Binders, Mowers, Drills and Rakes ;
Farm tools of every sort,
A list of which would be too long,
So we must cut it short.
The Farmer's GRAIN he buys for CASH,
For CASH, his Buckwheat Flour;
And the highest Market Price he pays
That lies within his power
Are you acquainted with this man ?
His trade extends for miles,
He always tries to please his friends ;
He is "THE MAN WHO SMILES."
9
AT DOUSE
Learned Mu Disagree. V
That even honest doctors maysom.Jf
time" disagree is nn evident fact, and , '
literature as in medicine thero aro ti
aides to a shield. When Professor 15. ft
Palmer was teaching oriental lnngnftK
at Cnmbridgo university, England, h,
received a note, badly written and In'
correctly sitelled, asking if he couli'
"read the inclosed document." ;
Tlie document proved to be a pn;- ;
written in Persian, and presented 'tit
difficulty whatever to the professor, wht '
sent it buck, saying that it was a wnt
rant or ticket for certain goods, settinu
forth in tho name of Allah the quanti
ty, quality and make of tho stuff.
A day or two afterward another lette?
camo from the same correspondent. It
contained a ten pound note and Uic '
words: f ,
DitAn Sin-itnomy for oM CnmbridRel Thli
was what tho Oxford chap said It was. l
"This" proved to be a copy of tho "Ox-
ford chap's" translation. $
"This very curious and most Interest.
in document," ho wrotfl, "appears to bs
a copy of an ancient Persian inscription,
probably taken from a tomb or a trium
phal column. It is, however, very in
complete. It rends as follows: 'In the ;
namo of God. This was erected by
natno uncertain in tho year uncertain.
It is one thousand four hundred nm
seventy-five long and seven hundrcs '
and thirty brond, and it' Here thn
manuscript abruptly ends." Youth'i
Companion.
The Jrweln of Saint.
Tlie idea of sanctity usually carries
with it a suggestion of poverty, ami it
may seem a contradiction to refer to the
jewels of ft saint. It boa been customary
for painters who oboono for their sub
jects saints or martyrs to treat thera
with the utmost simplicity. In a ma
jority of cases they are depicted as de
void of ornament or decoration, and in
tho few exceptional instances, as when
tho subject of tho picture is a ruler or
king, tho gems nro few and purely sym.
bolic, being sufficient only to denote the
rank of tho individual portrayed.
Raphael, who was perhaps the great
est painter of religious subjects fco world
has known, haa in most of his works ad
hered strictly to this rule, but in the
head of "St. Cecilia" is to be noticed a de
parture from it. A row of pearls, to which
are attached three pendants, ornaments
htr gown at the neck, and this is her
only jewelry. The hair is simply ar
ranged and without a jewel of any kind.
The single row of gems, themselves ths
emblems of chastity, emphasizes the ex
quisite simplicity of the face. Jewelers'
Weekly.
An rnpartlotiable OHudiio.
A young woman condemns hersolf in
the eyes of good society who 1b observed
to enter alono with a young man a place
for public refreshment, bo the restaurant
or tearoom ever so select. Bred undor
other conditions of a society so neces
sarily varying as that in our broad
America, a stranger visiting New York,
for instance, might readily and inno
cently make a ini.stuko of this nature,
nnd blush at finding horself condemned
for it. In the same category of offenses
is ranked that of maidens visiting places
of public amusement under the escort of
young men alone.
Many parts of tho south and west al
low this to bo done with tho smiling con
sent of good rociety, but in eastern cities
it is considered a violution of the code of
good form, and for tho comfort, if uot
tho convenience, of tho girl considering
it, had better bo ranked among tho lost
privileges upon which social evolution
may look back with fond regret. Mrs.
Burton Harrison in Lndiua' Hume Jour
nal. Mr. KtiK-mon Kucir What lie Wanted.
"Those who know Mr. Emerson best,"
said Miss Louisa M. Alcott, "were as
sured thut what seemed tho decline of
his faculties in Ids latter years was
largely but a seeming. It wan only words
he could not command at will. His very
forget fulnoss of the names of things
would often givo occasion for a flash of
his quaint, shrewd wit. I remember
once ho started for his usual walk, when
a light shower came up, and he returned
for his umbrella.
"He could not remember tho word um
brella, and we, who had not noticed tho
shower, had no clew to what ho was
searching for. Another wnlking stick
was brought him, another hat, a fresh
'kerchief, only to bo refused with that
perplexed shake of the head. 'I want,'
said ho at last ,'I want that thing
that your friends always borrow and
never bring back!' Could any one fail
to recognize that description?" Boston
Transcript.
OvercEeroUe.
' Physicians are protesting against the
overexercise taken by the slender, high
strung people who would better be hold
ing on to what littlo flesh they have,
whilo it is next to impossible to stir up
tho luzy, heavy class to exert themselves
enough to relieve thorn of their super
fluous bulk. Nature doos not safely guide
us in this purticalur. Thin people are
moved to lie active and fleshy peoplo to
bo lazy. The case calls for use of that
brain power that plans and reasons and
proves us higher than the monkey.
Newport News.
III! Lordship's Weight.
The present Earl Granville, some
years since, when Lord Leveson, swal
lowed half a crown during the perform
ance of some conjuring trick at a
Christmas purty. He was none the
worse for tho misadventure, although
the family wero somewhat alarmed at
first. The late earl, on being asked aft
er his son's health, told Lord Rowton
that h had gained eleven pounds. "Ah!"
replied tho witty peer, "that makes 11
Ss. 6d." London Tit-Bits.
Flue Threads.
If your nerves wero steady enough to
admit handling tho silkworm's threads
and you were to take a carpenter's rule
and lay such threads side by side until,
they covered tho space of an inch, yom
would find after completing the task
thut you had handled exactly 1,009
threads. St, Louis Republic.
I'
ft