S3w PROFSSIONAL CARDS, a h. Fiurz ATTOIINKY.AT.LAW, Oman Front ltoom, Oror l'ostofllco. 11L00MSUUH0, PA. T1I. MAfzU ATTO 1 IN ICY-AT- LAW, INSUllANX'K and JIKALEsTATK AOKNT, OfkIOK. Kuotll No. 2, Columman building. HLuOMSHUltG, PA. Jan. solh loss, tf. TfoT U.FUKK, ATTO WN U V-AT-LAW. ODtoe iuun huiuibk. ",00"s"""'-ri J OUW AI. CLAltrC AT TOHNKY-AT-IiAW 1M JUsTiCK OF THE PEACH. Di.oomshixo, l'i oiuco ever Moycr Bros. Drug Store. c W.-AlILLKIt, ATTOKNKY-AT-LAWi Offlceln Brewer's bulldlng.sccorid Door.room No.l llloomsburg, Pa. O FRANK ZAKK, " ATTOIINEY-AT-LAW. Bloomaburg, Pa. Office corner of Ccntro and Main Etrs ets. Clark a uuuaing. Can be consulted In German. Gr EO. E. ELWELL -ATTORNEY-AT-LAW, ULOOMSBUKO, i'A. Oflico on Bcconil floor, tlilril room of Col umbian uuuuiug, Mam street, uelow kx chnngo Hotel. V. WHITE, ATTORNEY-AT-LAW, . BLOOMSBURG, PA. .Ofilce In Witts' Uulldlng, 2nd lloor. may 1-tf 8. W1NTEUSTEEN, Attornoyat-Law AND NOTARY PUBLIC. Offlco In 1st National Hank building, second floor, nrst door to the left. Corner ot Main and Market treots nioomsturg, Fa. &&rJ'enswna and Bounties Collected. E. P. lilLLMEYEK, DISTBICT ATTORNEY.) ATTORNEY-AT-LAW. "HTOiUco over Dcntlcr's shoo store, llloomsburg, Pa. apr-3080. jy. II. IU1AWN. ATTOltNEY-AT-LAW. Catawlssa, ra, OBoo.corncr ot Third and MalnStreeta -JOBEKT II. LITTLK, ATTORNEY-AT-LAW, ULOOMSUUItO, I'A. nromce, Columbian Building, second floor, front room. QKANT HEKIUNO, ATTORNE Y-A r-LAW, 11L00J1S1SU1U1, I'A. Oflico over ltawllng's Meat Market. jyt. HONOItA A. KODDINS. onice and residence, West First stiect. Blooms burg, ra. novaa w ly. JB. McKELVY, M. D.urgfon and Plij slelan, north sldo Main strcnt.bclow Market rR. J 0. 3UJTTKR, PUVfclCIAN BDU030N, OGlce, North Market otreet, lilooniBt nrr, Pfc DH. WJL it. HEBEH Burgeon and Physician, omco corner of Rock and Market treot, J J. BROWN. omco and resldenco 3rd Street, West of Maiket near M. E. Church. OlUce hours every atternooD and evening, h-po clal attention given to tho eye and the fitting of glasses. Telephone connection. jyi. J. If. EVANS. Treatment of Chronic Diseases mado a SPECIALTY. Oflioo, Third Street, I5!,oo.ii3iwiio Pa -T J. 1IESS, D. D. 8., Waduate of tho Philadelphia Dental College, jiavlng opened a dental office In LOCKARD'S BUILDING, corner of Main ana centra streets, BLOOMSBURG, PA., b prepared to receive all patients rcquli ng pro e sslonal bcrvlces. KTilEIt. OAS, AND LOCAL ANAESTHETICS administered for the painless extraction of teeth free of cnarge wnen ariuaaui ieem iu uiseiieu. ALL WOHK GUARANTEED AS ItEPltESENTED. Oct S6-ly. vxr a. iioube, DENTIST, I5ioomsiiuuo, Columbia County, Pa ullstylcsaf workdonelna superior manner.work warraniraas rupresomou. iiiiuwiwvr kd wirnoor I'aik by the use of Gas, and free of ohargewlienarttaclalteeth arolnsertod, nmnnl., TWlnnta lmlliltmv Main atreft. below Market, live doors below Klcim's drug Btorc, nrst iioor. 7o be open at all hourt during the r'aj .N0V83.lT g i 1IAHTMAN BKrKSSINTS TDK FOLLOWING A MEXICAN INBUHANCE:C0MPANIKB North American of Philadelphia. Franklin, " " Pennsylvania, " " York, ot Pennsylvania. Hanover, of N. Y. Queens, ot London. North British, of London. omco on Market Street, No, 5, Bloomsburg. Vl'b. 11, I fi;; and Life Ins. Apy, ESTABLISHED IMS. M. TP. liUTZ (Successor to Frens Brown) AGENT AND BllOKEli, COMl'iHlKB BM'HESBNTSDI A'.tna Flro Ini Co., of Hartford,.. $ 9,S28,3sttli? Hartford ot Hartford CM.utJ tn 1 hoemx of Hartford 4,U8'4t9 13 i rinitileid of Sprlngtleld. S,OU!M03 IW 1 lie ,f t.lallon, Philadelphia 4.5i;,7siv ( i'.irc.lan of London co.w3,3!:iri 1 l'enlx, of London HWI.MUS 1 jnjjKhlreot EnglandtU. S. branch) I.MS.HO 00 l.jya! or England " " ,8J3,5M.oo Mutual lienent Life Ins. Co. ot New ark, N.J 41,319,228 3.1 LoasoB promptly adjusted and paid at this office. FIRE INSURANCE AGENCY OF J. II. MAIZE, Olllce 2nd floor Columbian Building, BLOOMSBURG, PA. Liverpool London and Globe, largest In the world. ASSETS. IMrRHIAL of London, S'Mi.VMrv.GO CONTINENTAL of New'1 Ork, tli3SI,tl.M AMERICAN of Philadelphia, (J,40i,UUI.ll NIAGARA of New York, $3,S0O,TV.tl una 1, 1S89, tr. A L E S fill Ely to oanvasa for tha sale ot Nursory Stock, ON BAUKY AND KIPHNdkH Ott COMUhUION. StO aJy employment, Apply ul onoe, stating J.D. Nellis&Co. WW 3. E. ELWELL, , J K B1TTENBEMDEH, Preflete" THE BARBER'S OPINION. "Some people think 'tis only mado I find it just the nicest thing For cleansing goods of heavy grade, For washing down the walls or stairs, The bureau, tables and the chairs; But folks do well to change their mind ; 'Tis not to things like these confined, And not alone the kitchen maid And laundress prize its friendly aid; A WORD OF WARNING. There are many white soaps, each represented to be " Just as good as the 1 Ivory' j " they ARE NOT, but like all counterfeits, lack the peculiar and remarkable qualities of the genuine. Ask for "Ivory" Soap and insist upon getting it. Copyrleht 1880. by Procter A Gamble. Wo l A. uunu don't the AND PLASTER. 25 CTS. 5 for $1.00 or mailed for price. Near Phlladeliihln. School Opens Hopt. 19th, Ycnrlr Kxpense, 9300. Quarterly l'armMsjSrJS. Admits and cluslf younc men and boys at any time I fits them P EVIRYWHERE Wl I 25CTS. 1 - r dliidqi, tor l oiDi or Annapolis. AavaDceD ciassei in rnrtici. neniinr rivlt Fiitrlnrr finer. rillf. Mlfhmatlr-a tr. Ctnt, nf tho l Mnlnr,4 an, h ludenti hoard with the Principal, 'leachersall men and fraduatn cf nnt-clats Coltegei. Tine buildlngl tingle ecdonhU rooms. Leiy room has la It a itam radiator and Is completely furnished. Ground! (ten acres) for foot-ball, htue-ball, athletics, etc. Gymnasium. Special opportunities for apt students to advance rapidly. 1'nvate tutoring and specfaldrlll for back ward boys. I'atrona or student may select any ituJie, or a Onalnes., Col lege- Preparatory, Klectncat, or Civil-Entrtncenne course. Physical and Cliemical Latwratory. Practical Business IK-partment, with Telffrtphy, Short-hand, 1 ype-wrltlne. etc., etc. More fully supplied with aparatus than any other CoIIckc fitting school. Media Academy affords every home comfort, the best education, and the lest training. I Ued prices coet every ctpense. Neeiamlnatlonsfor admission. New Illustrated catalogue sent free to any address. SWITHl.N C. SHOKTLlUGlj, A.D., A.M. (Uarvard CraduaW), Prlaclpal aad Proprietor, Aledia , 1'a. Circulars a t Uiis ctfice. CLOTHING ! CLOTHING Or. W. BBRTSCHj THE MERCHANT TAILOR. OF HVKKV DESCRirTION. Stilts mado to ordor at eboit notice iitid a fit alwayH guaranteed or no Hale. Call and examino tho largest and boat selected stock of goods uvor shown in Columbia county. Btoro next door to First National Bank MAIN STREET, ISiooiiisburg Pn. KOWIT AltII) THE BEST BURNING OIL THAT CAN BE MADE FROM PETROLEUM. It Hires a brilliant light. U will not Btnoke theculmnejrs. It will not cliar tlio wick. It has a high lire teat. It will not explode. It Is pre-eminently a family safety oil. WE CHALLENGE COMPARISON With any other lllumtnattniroll mado. We Stake Our Reputation, As rentiers, upon tho statement that 11 is THE BEST OIL IN THE WORLD. Asli your dealer for UANVIIXE, PA. Trado for nioomsbur? and Vicinity Supplied by MOVER BROS., Bloomsburg, Pa. lenMy, lie BLOOMSBURG, PA., FRIDAY, JUNE 21 ,1889. For toilet use and barbering. The slightest touches will suffice To make a foamy lather rise, That holds the beard till smoothly laid, However dull may be the blade. In short, the tale is ever new That tells what Ivory Soap will do." QUALITY AMI PRICE don t starve Quality to throw a 71. T i 1 i to jL-nce. in otiier words, we slight our work or use inferior tnniniings to tempt you with a low price for poor roods. None but the Best Clothing for Men, Youths, Boys and Children. A. C. Yates & Co LEIJOElt HUILDINO, SIXTH AND CHESTNUT, PHILADELPHIA. Fresh Hops, HemlochIgum ho PINE BALSAM CoMBINtO Spread on white muslin. Popular RELIABLE Apply one now fbr Backache, Bldeache, Rheumatism, Kidney Weakness, Tender Lunge, Bore Chest, BtUT Muscles, Female rams, utick, oprams, eve. It cures every sort of Pain, Ache, or WeiVnesa, and quickly, too. 1 r L C Look for tfgnature of HOP PLASTER.CO., Phopbictohb, BOSTON, ontiicsaiufMgood. for Ilutlnef i. any Collect, Polftethnlc YAINWKIGHT & CO., WHOLESALE GROCERS. I'llILADELl'llIA, I'A. i kas, syrtur.s, covfiie, bugah, moijisses oik ''oia 'ycios uhvoiii 'eaaus 'aom N. K. Corner Second and Arch Sts. ""Orders will rocclTO prompt atuintaoi I H M I M l 1 1 1 I I I . I .Mil .1 . SALESMEN WANTED! (iood rellabla men enn rlml normnnpnt. nm plojment by aildresslng E, O. I'mbson & Co.. Nurserymen, Wawrloo, N. V. We hire on HAI.A11V, and pay expenses, or on com-! mlsnlon If preferred, paying weekly. Stock, Itlrst class and guaranteed true to name. Appl) ,at oncfe Atntlncat p. Mavl7.r-4t llVL0!1!1" PronfMtl. Arihma, Indication 1 Um PARKER'S GtNQER TONIO ltliuut tleUy. It Lu k urwd iiiajiy wf tlie wvmt ouw( and It the brt remedy for all kffettloui of the- throat and limn, ajui dUaiM-a arilnirfrotnlintiurv blood and cirtauyiion. The feeUa and tack, MrunrllnffaraJnjtdhwae,aiid alowly drifting to th irrn, will m many ommm rwover their health by the timely um if rarker1 OlniwTonlc, but delay is dau trvroua. Take It lu tlma, H U lofaliuMe for all iAiai and dhurdvi ( atomach and bowtla. lOo, at Urut;i:W L.OOK ! If You want a good fltuatlon write HAY IIUOTtlHUS, Nurscrjinen, ltochonter. N. Y., as they aro in want of honest and uprtyht sa'esmcu to toll i heir choice aui hardy varieties of Nursery block, either on salary or commlsMon. Many new and valuable varieties to offer. Write hem at onre for terms. DELAYS AUK DANOEHOUS. Juno 7-lw.d. ALESftl E N WANTI'.I), IlellaUo men to canvass for NUHSEHY BTOCK. 1 fcTermaneut emplorinent. K.il.irv and Eidcu. es. or L'omints&lon, as preferred. WO varieties, iiiL-nmiuK lasi ttt-mi Bpi'lttlliea. Apply ai unco. It Is now the bent time In the year to begin. HLKN liKOTIlEKD, Itochester, N. Y. (Mention this paper.) June 7 Iw-d ISX0EANG15 HOTEL, WT. R. TOBBS, PROPRIETOR BLOOUSBUBQ, FA, OfrOSITBOOUHT HOOSK. ijirL'O and oonvenlent sample rooms, llath room hot and cold water; and all modern convenience Exchange Hotel, IIENTON, I'A. The undersigned has leased this well-known house, and is prepared to accommodate the publlo v-ttt' ill the conveniences of aorst-claasboiel. LKllUKL DltAKB, proprietor Jtt m.n.rriy RfhrmU. All I THE FIRST GRANDCHILD. "Grandmntliorr callsd th farmer, and Ur caino Out from tho tine wreathed porch a blushing dame, Surprised and eager at the ttrango now namo. The clock 1thln rang forth tho chlmo for eight. "AmessRel Head It quick how cnujou wait!" Her husbard, smiling, leaned upon the gate. At arm's length holding In his trembling hand The crlp whlto beet, while ha the writing scanned. Then read once more, with voice almost un manned! " Thy granddaughter salutes thee, Ilaby Bell, Mother and ohlld, thank Ood, aro doing well I' " A moment' tllence on the proud twain felL Bho broke It soon. "Grandfather, I congrat" "WJiat, met" the good man cried, lifting his hat " fJrandfather' me? I hadn't thought of that." Annie A. l'rcston. LOVE VS. DISCIPLINE. It was evening In tho gloomy old fash ioned kitchen of Farmer Groy. Tho green paper curtains, covered with pict ures of iinposslblo scenery and Btrango grotcsquo llguros, were lowered, shutting out tho whito moonlight as It lay upon tho snow covered fields llko glittering crystals. Great logs of oak and cedar filled tho wldo fireplaco, casting a ruddy, cheerful glow around tho room; an Angora cat Jay basking In tho bright firelight, whllo upon tho opposlto side of tho hearth, stretched at full length, lay a great New foundland dog; tho yellow painted floor was clean as hands could mako it, and altogether tho room presented a sceno of rural comfort not to bo despised. Tho farmer sat In his easy chair, deep In meditation, with his eyes fastened upon tho fire, whllo tho busy housewife, with deft fingers,, plied tho knitting needles, and glanced occasionally at tho couplo seated at tho tablo busy with their books. It was their daughter and tho district school toachcr. Faith Grey was an only child, and from tho tlmo when sho first began to talk had ruled her loving subjects in tho little kingdom of homo with absolute sway. Sho was now 17 years of age, with laughing brown eyes and waving auburn hair, that rippled aud shono with u touch of gold in its soft meshes when sho faced tho buii. Her com plexion was fair and puro ns an npplo blossom. Her dress was n slmplo brown merino, with a plain whito collar fas tened at tho throat by a bluo ribbon, whilo streamers of tho 6anio azuro huo confined tho meshes of waving hair. Sho was tall and slender, with a supple, willowy graco perceptible in every move ment of her graceful form. Her companion was apparently 23 years of age, with a broad whito brow and dark hair, which clustered in llttlo ringlets about his forehead; his eyes were black and penetrating; tho grave, firm mouth betokened lndomitablo will and strength of character; his faco was smooth, and his large, well mado form was arrayed in a suit of. plain black. Ho was college educated, and wldlo waiting for a situation liad learned that ho could have tho winter school in this district to teach, and being poor, had accepted it rather than remain idlo until a more) eligible one presented itself. IIo was far from despising small beginnings. He well know that tho school boro no enviable reputation, for by report It was known far and near. Only tho winter before tho scholars had chosen to give the teacher a seat In a snowdrift, and and then entering tho school room had held high carnival, laughing and jeering at him as ho tried In vain to enter, and In despair he had turned his back upon tho school and tho town. Ho well know that It was no light task which ho had undertakon, but only a tighter closiugof tho firm lips was visible ns ho accepted tho trtist, and silently vowed to conquer or die. It was a school of fifty scholars, ranging from four to twenty years of age. A mixed assembly, soino good, somo bad, and bouio neither tho ono nor the other, but ready to join tho btrongest arty. Ho was obliged to board around, and as ho was exceedingly particular uiul fas tidious in all his personal affairs, some encounters which ho was obliged to mako weru laughable in tho extreme. IlochohO tho place farthest from his school for his first boarding place, and ns he took his seat at tho supper tablo ho glanced ap palled at tho view which tho board pre sented. Tho dishes wcro cracked and grimy, and tho supper was comjiojed of a dish of (rotatoes, familiarly known among tho country peoplo as tho "long JoluiB." Gigantic in size, they lay black and heavy upon tho dirty plate, Hanked by a deep yellow dUh, two-thirds full of pork fat, whllo slices of tho pork, fried to a cinder, floated upon tho top. A plate of bread, with a leaden strip at tho bottom of each slice, and a small plecoof butter cumiiooed of alternato stripes of whito and yellow, completed the viands. He crushed down tho rising feeling of disgust and mado no sign, even when tho young sou, a boy of 10 years of ago, seized ono of the potatoes in his dirty, unwashed hands, and, bquecziug If, ex clalmedi "Harm, this 'ero 'tuter ain't done," and laying It down coolly repeat ed tho operation with tho rest. This wus it sample, of tho meals which ho was compelled to partake of whilo ho stayed at his first boarding place, but ho was more fortunate In his next selection. It was at Farmer Grey's, and Mrs. Grey was a noted housowife. Faith was ono of his hardest pupils to manage. Never doing any mischief which ho could trnco directly to her, yet, by somo unaccount able inllucnco, ho was suro that sho In duced tho rest to act In direct defianco of his authority, and when detected her own faco would bo as demure and Inno cent looking as that of a kitten. Sho was n ready and apt hcholur, and seemed really delighted with tho oppor tunities of learning which tho talented young muster placed within tho reach of all. Ho was possessed of a vast fund of general Information, and ho garo to them without measure and without stint. Ho was kind and gentle, but in very truth they found 1dm inastor all but Faith. As tho days lengthened Into weeks an unquiet spirit appeared to enter Into tho girl, and sho seemed almost boldly do flam. With oxoooding patience nud gentleness the master bore with all her freaks, and although sorely tried ho en deavored, by gentle, winning kindness, to bring her to seo tho great wrong sho was doing herself and lilm. Hut it was of no avail; tho uioro ho tried tho moro he might try, and tho dancing brown eyes shot forth angry sparks as at last ho passed her most daring pranks by In ab solute silence. However, tho crhds camo at last. At the noon recess ono of tho oldest scholars, a youth of 10, had tried to steal her linud kerchief In fun; it was a dainty affair, mado of lace and muslin, n present from her cousin in the city. Faith had reso lutely declined all such advances, but in the afternoon eho reached across tho oialo and laid It upon tlo open leaves of tho book where ho was studying. With a gracoful tow he acknowledged tho gift, and raised It to his Hps, when lol a tiny dead mouse dropped from Its folds, and a universal giggle ran through tho room. In desperation tho master called them to order, and there was a sharp riSffi 08 SLPait JEiS 6ravo Btern 'S.11-1 fl I if Mil lift it It which said, "Faith Grey can 6lop after school to-night," That was all, and, without casting a look In tho direction of tho young girl, tho business of tho day wont on as Usual, but each and all under stood that trifling was nt an end, and oven Faith's rosy checks paled a llttlo as sho glanced shyly at tho btcrn, quiet faco. It had been a hard day for tho young master, and it was no wonder If his pa tlenco was exhausted. In tlio morning ono of his largest scholars, a half wltted Frenchman, had entered lalo and Im mediately commenced to laugh, and all tho Information that could bo elicited from him was that ho guessed "tho two-year-old would get full by and by," and again his fat slde3 would shako with laughter. Ho was a grit, overgrown fellow of sixteen, who worked for his lxard at a farm about a milo from school, and at noon his employer presented him self at tho Bchoolhouso, and in loud, an gry tones ordered him never to dnrken his doors again. It nppeared that tho spring where tho cattlo had been In tho habit of drinking was formed by lowering n barrel into tho ground, and all around it was very slippery with ico, and as tho clown had driven them to drink, tho "two-year-old" had slipped and fallen In head first, and le!ng unable to gut out alone, tlio French man hail left it to "got full" whilo ho went to school. When found by tho farmer tho animal was drowned. Al though tlio schoolmaster could not lilamo tho farmer for his indignation, yet tlio circumstanco annoyed him exceedingly; and if ono might bo allowed to judgo by tho look of dctermiuation on Ills white, stern faco, Faith was likely to feel tho full forco of his authority, and oven her stout heart quailed n llttlo as tho shadows lengthened nnd tho day drew near Us clobe. Tho last lesson had been recited, tho last class had stood tip to spell; tho even ing liymn had been sung, and at last school had closed, tho scholars filing out of tho houso in good order nnd with a strange quietness and dUpatch, wrap ping about them their shawls, hoods and comforters. Faith, with tho roses all gono from her dimpled cheeks, was sit ting at her desk, whito and still. For ti fow moments, which seemed likonn eter nity to her, tho master sat nt his desk with head bowed upon his hands. Tho short winter's day was drawing to a close, and ono solitary sunoeam, red as blood, streamed through tho window and lay across tho desk exactly in front of her, aud to tlio day of her death Faith will carry a vivid inward picturo of that littlo schoolroom, for every article which it contained was indelibly Impressed upon her mind in thoso few moments. At last tho master raised his head and in low tones said: "Miss Faith, you may como here." At tlio sound of ids voico tlio blood rushed back to tho cheek which had been so palo but u moment ago, and her cour age revived. Sho aroao und with firm step walked across tho room und stood befovo him, and as their eyes met sho re turned his gazo unflinchingly. His wag a sad, beseeching look, ns though ho would urgo her to beg his forgiveness. Hers was a mixturo of fun and anger combined, but certainly they showed no signs of sorrow. As ho nroso to his foct Ids hugo form towered like n giant abovo her, and reaching over his desk ho grasp ed his ferule. "Hold out your haudl" And moro in sorrow than in auger he looked to see if his command was obeyed. Tlio words wcro jerked forth as though they caused tho speaker untold aln. Faitli obeyed, although tho whito Ild-a covered tho brown eyes and tho long eyelashes swept over cheoks as whito as tlio snow outside Sho had novcr re ceived a blow in her life, nnd she shivered as tho tips of her slender fingers wero firmly grasped, and ono bhoit, sharp, stinging blow descended upon tho whito palm, leaving a crimson mark that curi ously reminded her of tho blood red sun beam ns it lay across the desk. Tlio f erulo was raised for another blow when again their eyes met, but from tlio brown onea tho anger was gone, and they wero full of tears and muto plcadings.'and with ti dull thud tho ferule dropped to tlio floor, and tho girl was clasped p his heart in a wild, passionate embrace. In after years, when bho was tho loved and honored wife of tlio statesman who began his career as a district school teacher, Faitli was wont to say that tho keeping up of appearances so that others might not know what had occurred was tho hardest lesson sho had ever learned. It was impossible to become tho docllo pu pil which sho now longed to bo witliout exciting suspicion, nud for eight weeks sho ncted her part in a manner worthy of tho mo3t finished actress; and to this day it is an unsettled question between them as to which conquered. True Flag. Concentric cables nro claimed as tho best, on tho theoretical grounds for tho elimination of induced currents, as their reaction upon ono another is necessarily strongest In tho apis of tho current. A Nnro Stii. Merritt I'm afraid Cura's lovo for mo Ln't just hat it might bo. Giles That's nonsensf, old boy. Bho fairly UlolUes you. Merritt 1 don't know so much about that. I guvo her a costly present latt night, and bo foro tho thanked mo tho ran up ttairs to show it to her mother. Judge. Alioi;rtlur Tim Natural. Friend That mil In your Inst painting is very natural. Artist Yeo, altogether too nutural. Friend Why do you sny that! ArtUt Uecauso it dries up tho water in that pond so fast that I have to (mint now water every throo or four days. Judgo, .V SulUert fur !.)iitblnir. "What U tho must unlucky part of a cookl" askod old Chestnut. "Out with It," "Her hair, of course," "How's thatl" "Because, you know, It is always falling Into tho sou))." The Epoch. I t In. for Their Sake. "Wby, there is oU HobUI How did lie get here! He's not one of the Four Hundred." "No, but liii children camo of very good family on their mother's ldo, uud ho Is toler ated for their sake," Harper's Dazar. A llrlllluut Idea. Hardware Dealer Now, Mr. Rustlcus, there's what I call a bargain. That ttovo has a quick oven, aud the draught U so ar ranged that it will tavo ono-liulf your fuel. Mrs. It. (who is a student of economies) Lu cakes, pal why uot get two, and cavo all tho fuel I Harper's Bazar. LITERARY LIGHTS. Zola's new novel will hnvo five murders In it. Octavo Tlionet draws all her charncturs from real llfo. Iko Marvel, Donald O. Mitchell, has taken up writing ngnlu. Miss Chnrlotto M. Yong, now W years old, has n ritleu 100 books. Ixnita M. Alcott'n biography is definitely promised for next September. Mark Twain l preparing a now liook, "A Ynnkvo nt tlio Court of King Arthur." V, E. A. Aon, the poot, hiu resigned tho rditorshlpof T'o Manchester Quarterly. Miss Kmily Faithfull now get a pension of t2j0 a year from tho Kngllsh government. Tho "Cup of Youth," a second collection of poems by Dr. 8. Wclr Mitchell, h Just ready. F. Marion Crnn ford Informs n friend that lio has Just turned the hnlf-w ay post of a new novel. , AIlco Hynenian Rhine Is tho clover editor of Tho Graver and l'nletto, a Journal for art students. Sir Charles Husioll has been offered $10,1109 to deliver fifty lectures in tho United States next senson. James A. Froudo, tho English historian and man of letters, is tho latest convert to homo tulo in Ireland. Alphonso Daudet is still forced to romaia Idlo, owing to a return of his rheumatic and neuralgia pnlns. A volume of stories and sketches by Henry Guy Cnrloton is to bo published iu Now York by Ooorgo Muuro. Oscar Fay Adams, the poet and litterateur, Is slight in frauie, near sighted, gray lmlred and absent minded. A now book by Amelia B. Edwards, enti tled "Untrodden Peaks nnd Unfrequeuted Valleys," Li nearly ready. Oen. Low Wallace snys thnt there nro two things of which ho is immoderately fond, liorso racing and baseball. Herman Melville, once famed for his sailor stories, is still in tho land of tho Iking, though ho writes no more. A translation into English pne of Omar Khayyam's well known lines has been mado by Justin Hnntley McCarthy. Anna Ivatharluo Green is buily engaged utKiti a now novel, said to bo entirely unliko anything elao sho has written. Of Louis Ulbach's almost painful careful ness of style, it was onco sarcastically said "ho would split a hair in four." T. C Crawford, tlio well known new spaper fori ... pondeut, is said to hnvo permanently quit tlio Held of newspaper w ork. Tho Misses Hodgkin, two young English ladles, hnvo started The Hantn Lucia, a now monthly magazine for tho blind, in Drnillo tyw. Andreo Hope, author of tho powerful tale "A Terrible Night," is w rltlng a longer story of Russian llfo called "Princess ArinuoICara souuioll." Fergus Hume, tho author of tho "Mystery of a Hansom Cab," tho successful shilling shocker, has dramatized the novel "In Lovo nud War." Professor Noire, best known out of Ger many by his historical introduction to Kuut's ''Critiquo of Puro Reason," died recently ut Maycnco. Homer Greene, author of "What My Lover Buld," has written a serial story for tho Youth's Companion, called "The lllverpark Itcbolliou." M. Quesuay de Benurepalre, the new French procureur general, has won distinc tion ns a novelist uuder tho pseudonym Jules do Glouvet. Tlio Into Louis Ulbach was tho means of introducing to tho world tho pleasaut pretty book of the queen of Itoumaula, the 'Ten sees d'une ltelno." Don Joso Zorilln, tho now ly crowned poet laureate of Spain, is said to bo a decidedly diuereut person from his namesake, Huiz Zorilln, tho revolutionist. Lady Randolph Churchill is about to mako her debut in literature, it is said, with an articlo in Longman's New Review on her exiierienco iu Russian society lifo. Tho ox-King Milan of Servla Is going to writo his autobiography with the intention of presenting tho volume to his son, tho pres ent king, w hen the youth roaches his ma jority. It Is said that Mr. nowclls Is desirous of writing a novel which will toko in all kinds of characters to bo found In New York, an Idea based upon Bullae's "Coinedle Hu maiue." Dr. T, W. Parsons, tho wtll known trans lator of Danto, is said to bo tho Chesterflold of tho book making" set of Boston, and takes delight lu turning off sonuots to pretty women. Gertrude Franklin AthertonSi two success ful novels, "What Dreams May Come" and "Hermin, Suydam," will bo published by Uoittledge by arrangement and payment to tho author. Mrs. Helen Campbell, whosa literary la bors are strong pleas for tho children of "iov erty, resides on one of the finest slopes of tho Orungo mountains, whero sho does most of her literary work. A FEW STATISTICS. It Is stated that London contains moro Roman Catholics than Rome and moro Jews than 1'nlestiue. Statistics just published show that there ore 2.27J soldiers six feet or over in height In tho British army. Lcadhc htutistlcians of England assert that moro jiersons annually choko to death whllj eating in England than aro killed on the Eng lish railroads. Tho production of salt in France is now estimated to bo over 040,000 tons, obtained us follows! Salines of Midi, 800,000 tons; salines of tlio west, 250,000 tons; salluoa of tho eut aud the Pyrenees, 100,000 tons. Ill Australia there nro IM7.000 moro males tuau females. Including New Zealand and Tasmania, tho excess of moles over females is S0l,(H9. Women are constantly arriving in tho colonies, but tho men nro always iu tho majority. Tho annual tonuago on the 4,70a miles of uuvlgublo rivers nnd 3.SS9 miles of canals lu Franco amounts to about 0,300,000 tons. With depressod trade, tho 101 miles of tho Birming ham canal nlono had a tratllc, iu 1877, of 7, 000,000 tons. According to the statistics of Dr. Fodd, of tho Georgia State Medical society, tho llfo ex pectancy of various countries is iu follows! United States, 53 years; Eugland, W; Russia and Chill, 23; Soudan, 23; Franco, 45; Euroro, in medUnvnl times, 20; and Rome in tho tlmo of Casar, 18. There nro special factories In Taris for making children's watches which employ hundreds of hands. Thirty million aro an nually produced; In other words, l'aris pro vides every year a toy watch for every child between live aud ten iu France, Germany, Russia, (Ireat Britain, Italy and Austria. Hound to Kill Them Somehow, "Mary, said tho sick man, feebly, "Uioso yowling cats annoy mo terribly. Can't they bo reached by a shot gun or something of that kind!" "No," replied his wife; "tboy aro on tho flat roof of the adjoining house." "Mary," exclaimed tlio invalid again, after a pauso and his faco grow hard aud pitiless "throw somo of theso medicines up oil the roof I" Chicago Tribune. The Usual DLappolutmeut. Omaha Youth I've called for my new spring suit, Averago Tailor-Sorry, but It is not fin ished, Omaha Youth Why, you said you would havo it douo if you worked all night. Average Tailor Yw, but I didn't work all tilsbt. Omaha World. Couldn't Vie lllru. Electrician So yon want n Job, do your Stranger Ye. ir. I saw your advertise ment, and thought I'd call Electrician- W hat was your last busluossl Stranger I was a street car couductor, but during tho stiiko I lost my place. Electrician I'm sorry, my man, but wo havo no ue for non-conductors In ourbusi now, Judge, THE COLUMBIAN, VOL. XXIII.N0 25 COLUMBIA DEM03RAT, V0L.L1I1, NO 10 STRAY DITS. American yellow nlno it a croat favorlta for wooden pavements In Berlin. In England chock reins are now entirely out of use, being forbidden by law. The dog tax of France gives the state an annual rovenuo of about $1,800,000. Qulnino Is estimated to hnvo added two years at least to tho lifo of civilized man. John L. Sullivan in ten venrs lias boxed beforo audiences that paid nearly $000,000 to seo hint. Tho deepest coal pit In tho world Is said to bo tho St. Andre, In tho Charlorol, Belgium, district. Tho Mormons of Utah aud Idaho aro emi grating hi largo numbers to British North America, Florida has 113,000,000 invested in tho orange, business, and tho sales this year were a fourth ot that big sum. An Orlando, Fla., iwltceman shot and wounded a dog, when tho canine's compan ion pitched Into tho officer and drove him to filght. Tho roadway of the recently completed Washington bridge over Harlem rivor, New ' York city, is 151 feet above the river level. The total length of tho bridge and its ap proaches is 2,380 feet. Baron Lieblg, tho German chemist, says that "as much flour as can llo on the point of a table kuifo contains as much nutritive con stituents ns eight quarts of tho best and most nutritious beer that is mado." A frafrment of a meteor which recentlrfoll In Chicago was analyzed and found to con tain Ti per cent, of Iron, 21 of nickel, 3 of manganese and small quantltiesof aluminium, cobalt, tin, copper, arsenic, eta In cousonuouco of the decline in tho supply of gum arabio tho postoQlco department has been obliged to abandon its uso as a sealer of letter cuvolopes. In llou of gum arable a foul Lasting compound has been substituted. At tho funeral of tho late Mrs. Henry Hoff man at Sassamausvllle, Berks county, Pa., there woro usod up at tho funeral feast 200 plos, soventy-flvo loaves of broad, sixty dozen rolls nnd cakes, a calf and a largo quantity of nam. Tho largest passonirer terminus In London. Liverpool street, is to bo enlarged, at a cost for land alouo of $3,350,000. The extension will enable, tho number of trains to bo in creased from tho present figure, 700, to 1,000 dally. Fort Kcogh, M. T has tho widest rango of tempornture of any place on earth. Last summer tho thermometer ranged from 120 dogs, to ISO degs. abovo, whllo recently it marked C5 degs. below zero a total rango of loo orgs. Tho extraordinary growth of Volapuk in popularity is evidenced by tho fact that its adherents aro now supporting thirty-two montuiy journals, whllo twlco as many news papers devote departments to tho "universal" tongue, Tho fruit growers of California, finding that ieach stones mako nu excellent fuel, aro now selling them at tho rate of $0 a ton. A sack of stones will weigh about eighty pounds, and is said to lost as long as an equal number of pounds of coal nnd givo an even greater heat. Progress is again to bo recorded in tho mat ter of powerful war ships. Tho Italian iron clad Ruggiero dl Latum, which has just been triod for sliced, reaching 17.0 knots, carries four of tho largest guus yet brought Into practice, 110 tons. Her sister ship, Andrea Dor In, will soon bo ready. Henry Whitney, a tramp, the top of whoso skull was lately knocked off by a Nickel Plate locomotive, is lying in tho Erio county alms house with a "nakod brain," and may livo. Tho douuded brain, tho physical workings of which can bo plainly seen, Is kept from ex jmsuro by nu artificial covering. So widespread lias inebriety become among children in Austria that it is no strange thing to seo drunken boys and girls enter tho school houses. Tho evil has become so great that tho Vlonua school board has Invoked tho power of tho government to prohibit tho salo of intoxicants to boys and girls under 10 years. Tho averago speed of a rapid witness is generally quoted at ISO words per minute. Most of tho Irish witnesses in tho Paruell trial reached 200, and ono woman attained tho speed of 230. Baron Douso, an Irish judgo, Is bald to novo delivered his opinion in a trial recently at tho rate of 200 words per minute. Tho official figures of tho United States census in 1700 wero 3,029,820, of which num ber 003,055 wcro slaves. A short tlmo after these llguros appeared Capt. O. Imlay, a Vir ginian, publlshod an article in which he placed tho population In 1690 at 01,000,000, and was therefore supposed by his friends to be visionary. It is no longer from mining but from agri culture that California gathers wealth. Tho estimated valuo of her fruit crop in 18S9 lj $21,000,000; that of her wheat crop, $52,000, 000. From barley sho is expected to derive a gross return of $5,500,000; from dairy prod ucts and vegetables, $11,250,000, and from wine, $1,000,000. Agamo of poker lasting eighteen hourswas ployed in Glenwood Springs, Colo., tho other day. It began with an ante of $0.50, rising gradually till several times there were from $0,000 to $20,000 on tho board at a time. At tho como in a pair of kings wero onco worth over $1,100. Ono man mado a blind good on n pair of fours for $500. Half a million dollars are to bo expended giving better teruilnnl facilities to tho New York end of the East rl tr bridge. As New York stems likely to bo disappointed in its demand for greater rapid transit facilities in tho direction of tho upper end of tho island, Brooklyn anticipates nu Immigration of ag grieved Now Yorkers. Elastlo side boots began about 1S13 and the elastics wero mado iu England. Boots and shoes wero sewu up to tho year 1800. Then nails wero introduced. It was about the uiiddlo of the lust century that high heels be gan to bo worn. Makers of heels wero then Introduced into tho shoemaker's trade. Even now thore aro 400 heel makers in Paris. CREATION'S LOWER ORDERS. Dan Walker, of Eustis, Flo., has an alliga tor that ho is breaking to drive In hanioss. Mr. I'roeland, of Nowport, Pa., owns a hairless calf, which attracts mauy visitors. In Uytlmo ho will havo to enrobo It In ilynet. Ono afternoon, whilo Nelllo Sawtello, of Smlthileld, Me., was sleeping ounlouugo, a pot cat of tho family throw across her nock an adder which measured three feet In length. Sho throw It on tho floor, whero It showed fight, so as to keep her a prisoner until a neighbor arrived aud killed it, Tho steamer Nowfleld landed at Halifax the other day and sent two 6ollors ashoro to got cats. They secured over thirty In two hours. Tho cats aro to bo tukon to Sablo Island and used for destroying tho rabbits which are beginning to overrun tho island. They burrow lu tho sand, making largo holes, which wuse the ponies to stumblo and "break their less. She Would Go, Miss Gotham You'll jolu our theatre party to-night, of courso, MUs Wabashf Miss Wabash (of Chicago) What is tbs play I Miss Gotham Pygmalion. Miss Wabash Yes, ludeed, with pleasure! You know papa is in tho pork business. Tho Epoch, Nut Oollly. Judge What Is your uamof I'rlsouer How ells, your honor. Judge Aro you related to tho novelist! Prisoner (Uaniefaoedly) Yes, your houor. Judge You aro discharged. No ono of that family would havo anything to do with a plot, The Epoch, Till, lleally Worried Uliu. Crimplo (to tramp) My friend, you look as If you were in tho soup. Tramp That ain't what worries me, guv nor; tho trouble is howtcr git somo soup later me. Time. A Ixiug Dlalanee, It Is osllmatod that somo women carry for ty or fifty miles of hair about on their heads. Vorty or fifty miles without a switch U u goou long dutuueo for an 'air line, Law-, renro AjurkiL j Mr. and Mns. bowser. In Wilcli Mra. nwsr Comri la the Front mi Usual. I hnd a caller tho othor afternoon when Mr. Bowser camo home, and after the hail gone ha asked i "How long was Mrs. Blank hereP "About half nn hour," "And you talked about fashions, I sup pose I" "Yes, mostly what should we talk aboutr" "Mrs. Browser, did It ever occur to you that there was anything In life beyond mil linery and dross goods and dressmakers f" "How!" "Howl Why select some subject of sns art, science, mineralogy, the labor ques tion, or self government und discuss it with calmness and justice, and learn something worth remembering for half an hour. You women folks might ns well havo been born with n pumpkin on your shoulders in place of a head." 1 made no reply to this, but determined to catch Mr, Bowser In Ids own trap beforo th week was out, Kortuno favored mo. It was only two days beforo a neighbor called over as ho n as at work In the back yard, and for two long hours those men sat down On d lad der anddlicU3sed tho question whethcra buck gato should open Inwards or outwards', and the advantages offered by either situation. Mr. Dowser contended for tho goto opening outwnrds, nnd tho tiolglilwr for tho opposite, and the discussion resulted In Mr. Bowser get ting rod clear back of tho ears and jumping up to exclaim! "Well, let's drop the subject right liere. There can bo cranks on alley gates as well as on politics nnd religion." "And there can bo lunatics outside of tho a.ry lums," hotly replied tlio neighbor. "Don't call mo a lunatlol" "And don't you call mo a crankl" "Go homo and hang your old gate to the moon I" "I'll hang It according to tho rules of com mon sense, nnd don't you forget it." When Mr. Bowser came in to wash his hands 1 observed! "Mr. Bowser, did it ever occur to you that there was anything in llfo beyond hanging a back gatef' He replied with a "humpkl" of disgust. "Selxct somo subject of sense, Mr. Dowser art, sclcnco, mineralogy, the labor question or self government and discuss it with calm ness and judgment and learn something worth remembering for halt an hourl" He lookod around In a desperate, helpless way, aud put on his hnt and went off with out a word in reply. I wasn't going to let him off on that, however. When ho came homo that evening 1 had Mrs. Orfendorf over to supjier, and as soon as we wero seated at tho table I queried: "Doesn't it strike you that Germany's poli cy on tho Samoan question Is ono of concilia tion Instead of aggression P' "It certainly does," sho replied, "but there may bo a hidden motive behind this seeming submission. Trace tho record of tho man back as far us you will, and his policy has been either aggression or strategy." Mr. Bowser looked from ono to tho other of us In astonishment, "I notice," said I, as I passed tho biscuits, "that the Spanish colonial policy is working towards a radical change. Incited by the example of other and stronger nations, it Is about to extend its arms and enfold new pos sessions." The stare that Mr. Bowser favored mo with mado my flesh creep. "I do so hope you can como down to the next meeting of tho Woman's Scientific, Po litical and Literary club," said Mrs. Orfen dorf, as she toyed with her strawberries. "Tuoso gatherings aro very, very Interesting. At our last meeting we discussed the 'Drift Period,' and at tho ouo noxt week we shall discuss 'Two Proiosed Amendments to the Constitution of tho United States."' "Oh, I'd like to go over so much, and I think i can promise you I will bo there. Can Mr. Bowser come, loop' "Well, hardly. Men tako such little Inter est la such things that they aro obstruc tions." And Mr. Bowser sat there, turning rod and palo by turns, until his chair grow so hot that ho had to pretend a headache and get ex cused. I anticipated an awful tragedy after my visitor took lier departure, but Mr. Bow ser contented himself with saying: "Now that thnt shallow pated, long nosed old nuisance has finally taken her leave, let's go to bod." IIo regained his assurance after a couple of days, however, t was talking to our 3-year-old baby, and talking as all mothers talk, when Mr. Bowser tlung down his paper and ex claimed; "Mrs. Bowser, you mako mo tired tabling to that young un that way. No wonder so many children grow up to bo sap headed." "How shall I talkP' "Talk sense the samo as you would to an adult. He's old enough to understand, and I believe he will appreciate it." "Very well; I'll try." "Tliauk you. It's moro than I expected you'd do." The trial camo that night. Wo had scarcely got to bed when baby awoko and began to whine. Ho had got cold and was feverish, "Now, Harry," I began, "snug down and try to go to sleep. It's nothing serious, and I object to being kept awako." IIo howled more lustily. "My son," I continued, "this exhibition of Ingratitude astonishes mo, nnd I insist that ou change your course of conduct at onco or leavo my house. Filial respect, if nothing" "What in thunder and blazes are you talk ing aboutP roared Mr. Bowser, as ho sat up In bed. "I'm talking senso to baby." ' "Not by a jug full, you alu'tl" "Then you try it," "I'll try it by wringing his neck If he doesn't shut off steam Ilo's howling outof spite I" "Then warn him that you may be com pelled to inflict duo chastisement, but do It calmly and grammatically." "I I I I I I I" That's what Mr. Bowser said as ho jumped out of bod and disappeared into tho spare, room, and that was tko last I saw of him un til morning. Detroit Free Press. A Natural Inference, Small Boy Papa, won't you tako mo to tho circus I Strict Father No, my son; tho circus is tho abiding placd of Satan. Small Boy Say, papa, he knows a good thing when he sees It, dont hoi Scribner's Magazine, If fogs ccnld lw driven from the ocean they uever would bo nil.t, Texas Sittings. Not Su Hud in All That, It is well known that fishermen, after get ting n faro nt tho Georges, mako liasto to get to Boston, as tho earliest arrivals get the best prices. A worthy captain who sails out of Boston having been fortunate enough to se cure an unusually large quantity of flsb crowded on nil sail nnd started for home. A sovero storm arose during which three men wero washed overlioard and lost. One of these was n unlive of Portugal. The loss was a severe blow to tho captain, who had been congratulating himself upon receiving tho commendation of the owners of the vessel for tho very largo faro ho had secured. The news of tho loss of tlio men preceded the ves sel's arrival, and tho owners were aware of it and looked down with very grave faces upon tho captain us ho sheered alongside of tho w harf. "Wo'vo got tho biggest fare that's come to this wharf, you tet,"sald tho captain. "What good U that," said one of tho own ers, "when you havo lost three menl" "Who snvs thatl" asked tho captain. "Why the tug boat brought lu the news." "That we'd lost threo men!" "Yes." "Well, It nln't so bad as all that Only two men and n Portugeo," Boston Courier. Ku.lly round. Aged Now Yorker I've often wondered whut becanio of my playmate, Will Wlnkel, whoso Kireuts removed to Philadelphia whllo he was very young. Sixty years ago be was (.u errand boy In a Markot street store, but I haven't hoard of lilm since, Philadelphia!! (astonished) Well, why don't you go to the store and Inquire! Most likely ho Is there yet, Now York Weekly, Only Tempted. "Boy I" shouted a Michigan avenue grocer, "didn't I seo you iockot ail applo from that barrel!" "No, sir." "Look otd' You were acting very suspi cious. I wu watching you." "Yes, 1 kuuw you wore, and that's tha reason I didn't make a grab aud run for It." Detroit Frw l'tw I Hi J i, 14