Newspaper Page Text
COLTJMBIAJS" AND DEMOCRAT. BLOOMSBURG, COLUMBIA COUNTY, PA.
Wit and Humor.
Tho fntfiors of families who must
work for n living represent tho papa
labor of tho world.
When a oat gives au entertainment
from tho top of a wall it iun.t tho cat
Wo objeot to, it's tho waul.
If most pooplo only know as much
as they think thoy know thoy wouldn't
talk no much about it.
It must bo toniblo hard work to
hold office, bo many occupants aro ob
liged to go away for needed rest.
Now is tho tlmo of tho year when
tho much sufferine snall bov ecu
shingled by tho barber and bis mother
Thoro is only tho difforonco of an
"a" botweon woman's weakness and
man's weakness. Ono is gossip and
tho othor go sip.
Somo pooplo who attempt to regtr
lato the morals of tho pooplo cannot
look at an approaching policemen
without a shudder.
You can tell when a dog is warm
tho same as you can tell a dudo when
yon meet him on tho street by his
Judging from tho number of coun
terfeiters arrested lately, tho Italian
immigrant seems to think this a great
country to inako money in.
Unmarried lady. It must bo a great
thing when husband and wifo aro of
ono mind. Married lady. That de
pends on whose mind it is.
" I notice you novcr try to shine in
conversation, Bromloy.'' "Well, no.
Fact is, Darringer, it keeps me busy
trying to conceal my ignorance
Peoplo who keep summer boarding
house aro begining to wonder by
this whether city peoplo really eat
that way all year round.'
What's that! A woman can't keep
a secret? Just try to find out the ago
of ono of the dear creatures and let
us know how you come out
Alberto O. darlincr. I lovo you:
listen to my prayer. Elsio Your
chances aro better if you'll co to tho
piano and sins tho latest song. I hate
"So this is Castlo Garden!" were
his first words as ho landed "Well, I
supposo the next thing in order is to
plow up tne police!"
Ethel Papa says the money mar
kot is unsteady. Edith Why, Un
cle George said this evening thatlmoney
was tight. Ethel Well, that's what
makes it unsteady.
" Seo here, Brown, you took that
umbrella from my office and I want
it." "I know I did, but this umbrella
belongs to Smith.'1 "What if it does?
I stolo it first."
Mrs. Parshley (as the boat pitches a
triflo) How delightful this little
swell is, Mr. Parshley! Young Brock
elsby (complacently) I always try to
be entertaining, Mrs. Parshley.
A fashion writer tells us that puffs
are quito the proper thing in female at
tire this season. It is noticed that ac
tresses continue to come to newspa
pers for them as heretofore.
She (at Manhattan Beach) What
is tnat tho orobestra is playing, JUr.
Sampson! He Mendelssohn's "Wed
ding March." She O, is it! 1 have
so often longed to hear it.
An Atchison lady was asked what
sno tnougnt would be tlia tirst tbing
women would do if they had Iho male
ihg of the laws, "Limit the number of
lodge meetings, ' was the reply.
"Pa, what's an anomaly!" asked
Bobby, looking np from his book
"That the American oicle is baldhead
ed, yet thero aro no flies on bira." re
plied pa, viciously slapping his shin
"Now, John," said his wifo as sho
was about starting for the couDtry,
"be caretul about drinking ice-water.
"Maria," he responded reassuringly
out unthinkingly, i won t drink
drop of water while you're gone."
Mrs. Smith (engaging servant)
Can you write! Servant Yes, ma'am
Mrs Smith Well, here is a card; write
my namo on it, (Servant writes "Mrs.
A. B. Sraytho.") Mrs. Smith (looking
ami iou aro engaged.
Tho watering place letter that has a
receipted hotel bill written into its
body for publication is somewhat sick'
ening, and cannot be regarded as relia
ble whep speaking of rooms and board
iii giuwiug terms.
At the seaside: Dorothy But, Her
man, i can t answer you now. I I
give me time to think before I reply,
xierman uviin rapturous passion)
Certainly, my own angel. But don'
ruaice it wo long, because it costs me
35 a day at this beastly hotel.
Wife (at breakfast) I took ppeoial
pains wun mo breakiast this morning,
jonn. li everything all nghtT Hus
band Well er er the coffee is
littlo too hot. Wife I am nlad of
for your sake, dear. You wouldn't be
happy if you weren't a little bit dissat
Prospective son-in-law Modern cus
tom justifies me in asking you how
mucn you are going to give your
uaugmer in oaso wo marryT rrospect
lvo father-in-law Yes, nnd modern
custom instifies me in askincr vou ho
many of your debts you expect to pay
wim my money.
Miss Pert (just arrived from city)
navo you been enjoying yoniuelf, Mr.
Dasher! Mr. Dasher (who has been
at seaside two weeks) No. It's aw-
luliy dull, you know. Ho excitement
nobody drowntd nothing at all
Miss Pert Well, somebody must start
tho funs why don't yon!
"I soo that canaries aro tho favorite
birds in your saloon," said a customer
to a barkeeper, as he pointed to eovo
ral cages hanging ovei the bar. "That'
where you make a mistake," said the
drink dispenser. "Why," what then
are luo most popular birds here!
"Swallows," replied the gin mill jug
"iou aro charged, said the magi
tiato to tho prisoner, "with having th
ymes au living.' "Tho chargo is
atrocious, and the man who makes it
h unworthy of respect,' declared th
prisoner, Ins eyes blazing with right
eous indignation. "I do not deny that
I havo had fivo wives, but two of them
Clergyman should bo brief and to
tho poipt. A Boston clerg yman once
had a broad hint to tho effect. "Wo
would liko to havo you short when you
marry us," said a propsectivo liricV
gtoun, "because wo are going Wtt,"
"How soon after tho ceremony will
jou start!" asked tho clergyman. "In
ubout a week," was tho reply. Then
the minister realized ho had a reputa
tion as ono poodotaiug tho gift of con
Th Treacher was Amased-
Ho was an old man, attired in sohor
black, nnd had conio on to attend tho
Presbyterian convention. His bluo
badgo waved gently in tho wind, nnd
ho has been down to tho academy to
hoar tho speeohes and take part in tho
debate. On his way up ho stopped in
n popular cafo wltii tho intention of
purchasing n good char. After con
sldcrablo delay a cigar was sclcctod
through tho joint efforts of tho rover
end gentleman and tho attendant at
the cigar-Btand. He lighted it and ask
ed its price. It was a quarter. Was
thero over suoh a prioo paid for a cigar
boforo ? Ho thought not, and began
to expostulate vigorously against the
In tho mean time, a prominent law
ycr who had been standing near by
taking in tho wholo seem , approached
tho oigar-stand nnd in a quiet voice ro-
i , . .. .
mariceu 10 ine nuo'iuani, -ituum civu
me a cigar ono 01 the usual kind," at
tho same time drawing lrom his pocKCt,
a $5 bill. Tho clerk, who know tho
joko, parsed out tho cigar, took tho
bill, which ho placed in tho cash draw
er and turned away.
Tbo countr7 clergyman was dumb
founded. Ho loft tho placo without a
word, and tho odds aro about ninoty to
ono that somo quiet village win uo
electrified in tho near futuro by a
powerful sermon on tho extravagances
of city life. After his departure, the
i . . . . i , . i.r i
uwyer rciurnca ana gui ins ciiuugc
$1.8o l'Mlaaeipliia uimes.
KnkwWhatIt Was to Fast.
Wonderful, isti' it, how peoplo can
co for davs and davs without food!
F'vo Inst been reading about n man out
West Who hasn t touched loon lor
"Nothing remarkable about that. '
"You think so!"
"Certainly, I do. I lived in a board-
ing-liouso in Now Yoi k for two yoars
WAimhii's Loo Cam
lis." "Couch nnd Con
sumption H o m o d y,"
"Horn n n d Buchu,"
"Exli nit," "Hair Ton-
-"Llvcr Pilk" "Plaster," (Por-
Eleotrioal). "Hose Cream," for
Catarrh. Thuv are, liko Warner's "Tip
pecanoe," thq simple, eiTectivo rcmodies
oi inu oui J.og vyauiu nays.
The Planets In September.
WHAT MAT BE BKEN IN T1IK HEAVENS
DUniNO THE MKSENT MONTH.
Mercury is evening star, and as ho
speeds on his eastward courso ha will
overtake Venus, who is also traveling
caHward from tho sun, but at a slower
pace. Tbo two planets will bo in con
junction on tho 18th at 10 p. m, Tho
swift-fooled planet will next encounter
Uranus moving:westward. lhe, plan
ets will be in conjunction on tho 10th
at noonday. On tho 22d ho will be in
conjunction with Spica at 2 p. m.
Mercury is in tho constellation Leo,
He will set to-morrow at G:38 p. m.
On tho 30th ho will set at 6:09 p. m
Venus is eveniug star, and before
the month olosos will set more than an
hour after the sun. Observers will
find her in the west, south of tbo sun
set point and visible soon after tho sun
has gono down, Hue will makq a close
coniunctiou with Uranus on tho l'Jth
at 3 p. m. Venus is in the constellation
Virgo. Sho will set to-morrow at 0:52
m. On tbo 30th she will set nt 0:17
Mars is evening star, but ho is sc
far away and so near the horizon that
he looks liko an insignifiuent star in
contrast with his ruddy glow at his op
position in April. 110 will meet and
pa's Jupiter on 11th. Mars is in con
stellation Libra. Ho will set to-morrow
at 9:08 p. m. On tho 30th ho will
set at 8:20 p. m.
Jupiter is evening star, and will stand
once more at the head of tho list of the
pleneta' brotherhood in September.
It is, howeyer, his last appearanco, for,
though almost a son himself, he will
soon draw so near the far more power
ful central sun as to be entirely eclipsed
in his beams.
Mars will overtako and pass Jupiter
on the 11th at 9 a. in. On the 2 2d, at
8 p. in., Jupiter will bo in conjunction
with Beta Scorpii, being twenty-eight
degrees south. This makes tho third
time that tho planet has passed tho
same star during tho year, but he will
not return to his near vicinity until
twelve years havo passed. Jupiter is
in tho constellation Scorpio. On tho
2Uth he will set at i:53 p. m.
saturn is morning star, and will en
joy the honor of being the only planot
isible in the morning sky.
Uranus is evening star. Ho will be
the planet nearest to the nun, among
the evening stars at the close ot the
month, for Mercury and Ver.iu will
have passed east of him during its pro
gress. Uranus is m tho constellation
Virgo. Un tho 30th he will set at
5:48 p. m.
JNeptuno is morning star. lie 18 in
tho constellation Taurus. On the 30th
he will rise at 7:53 p. m.
Uranns, Mercury, Venus, Jupiter
and Mars will be evening stars at the
close of the month. Saturn and Nep-
tuno will be morning -tars.
She Tried and Knows.
A lending chemist of New York
myi ! " No plasters of such merit ft
before been prodnced." Thoy are
n novelty because they are not made
simply to sell cheap, they aro tho
bct that science, skill nnd money
can prodnce, ftnd villi do what is
claimed for them. For sprains,
aches, weakness, Umcncsf, etc.,
they ate nncquslcd.
KM rolton Rl ,BoflnVT,0 , NoT.Jl.W
Tho Athloi-horoii J'lMtor si-ted Ilk
mti tt l thn hiH t arer trlrtl ftnil
,ld -'rlMM-M rw all iiirrat thn ifcme
iipnt mini no now. a urnum.
unouiaer in rfuir. i
bsra nl rany Mniln. Our rtrniwltj
1 iur uta
r-Mutul lnoe, but l uooj. not rJn me a
ill now. Sire. Witui Uaui.
f Bend cent for the bcmitlrul colored pto-
llin'i 'Aiwruii uiviuvu.
THE ATMOPHOROS CO. 112 Wall St. N. t.
R Alii ROAD TIMS TABX.B
A. G YATES S CO
Tho lioiiiv season in tho United
States and Canada proves to bo nearer
to a failure of any soason m somo
time, except last year. Throughout
tho wholo country tho nights havo been
cool, which is unfnvorablo to the secre
tion of nectar, whilo at tho "West tho
drought of last year killed tho whito
clover so that no crop could havo been
scoured there, had tho weather been
over so favornble.
rKL.VWAKE, LACKAWANNA AND
! W Hmll
Kranieli & ISacli
NORT11CMP.IRI.ANH,.. .. 8 40
Ctimeron 5 53
Itupert.. s no
uioomsuurK - w u
.1010 JUUKU. .... u
WlllOW OrOTO..... ... 0 54
Berwick " 03
nencU Haven 1 11
Ulck's Ferry. 7 19
Hhlckshtnnr " xo
iiumocK-B t 1)
Nantlcoke 1 so
Avamlalo. .. 7 M
mmouthJunctlon,.... 8 03
Kingston 8 os
licnneii .... .
Maltby 8 17
wromini? 8 K
ucsi nuaiuu o
nttston - 8 83
Taylorvllle.... 8 48
KCHANTON. ,.... 9 00
AND THE CE1.F.URATF.D
Wilcox & White Organs.
HTPlanos "unci! and Repaired by com
Send for Catalogued.
21 WEST THIRD ST.,
iiest in the woaiiD.
Its wearing quaUUcs aro unsurpassed, actually
outlasting two poxes or any otner oranu. not
elTcctot b j heat. rzrOF.T THE GENUINE
ron sale mr dealers oeseiullt.
I. H. i.
The Transportation of Petroleum.
To what cxt6nt is tho competition
of Rtifsia to affect tho ealo of Ameri
can petroleum in Europot It has al
ready nearly driven it from tho Aus
triaii empire, though lho effect is not
yet vory apparent in western Europe.
Tho transportation of petroleum on tho
Mediterranean 111 summer presonis
dangers that render it almost impos
sible. When tho tcmporaturo of tho
air about tho vessel has reached a cer
tain point tho volatile elements of lho
oil escape and form a sort of clement
about it so combustiblo that it is im
possible oven to light a match without
its taking fire. Life on a steamer un
der ttiOBO conditions becomes horrible.
In tho summer of 1883 a steamer
bound from Batoum to. England went
tho wholo diBtanco from tho uaruan-1-. . -j ,
.lies to Gibraltar after tho point of PiKodl- M h C. P l) nt.h-
ihtlammability had boon passed. The J-" K
tiros under the engines had to bo ex
tinguished and sho went under sail.
T . : . . 1 .
It Wai IIUUOBBIUIO IU I1UVU U 11IU uvuu
in tho galley. Tho sufferings of tho
officers nnd crow during this period
can hardly bo conceived. Perfect saf
ety was not obtnined till lho cargo
was removed in nn Ingush port.
Tho question of ltussian competition
really depends on tho permanent sup
ply of oil from tho Baku wells,, and
thcru aro doubts oven among tho engi
neers of tho ltussian companies upon
tho Mitiiect, It is thought that oil
will be tound eisowhero in too uau-
casus. Thero aro deposits undor tho 1 o CMITW Art .( 1
rntsl.tnn ni aVinttrn w nil nn fnn mir. I el -- - fciTXX X A. J. 1
faco nnd in some of tho islands also in
Turkestan. It remains to be shown to
what extent theso resources will prove
X, it AH
I)tTit lnn from neteeteil nrler Malt and truarftntccd to bo chrmlrntt r,
nnrt.lree from Injurious oils nnd tcWsoIten contained in alcoholic liquors, n
especially adapted topcreons requiring a stimulating tonic, ConsurflptlTes bcln
trratly liencnlted by Its use. ltecommended by leadmg plijslclana as a piuretl
ftervlnc. Tonlo and Almrative. For consumptlun it l Inraluablc. MiIihinkS'
rtlltl! liAltl.KY MALT W1IISKBV Insui en a return of vigor to tho stomach, h gooa
appetite, a rich nnd abundant blood andlncrented ncsli nnd muncularllftue. A
Btlmulantmuaanngcntioin encct. uytprpsia, lnaiKesiion ana an wonting 6a
cases can bo entirely conquered by the u c it I'errlne'a I urc Iinrlcy alt WhlsVey,
It Is a tonlo and diuretio ana nnoweriui nn i gi
ItlNK'S PUllE nAKLBY MALT WI11SKKV hl.a
pi-oved a medicinal protection to
dr and vhose dally workpnn i.
Ablr To.il nt-nrear. drncrirlRt nr;trmrfr fA.fn.
pRiiliiNK'srimitiiAiiI.UY MALT WHISKEY ii vlvcs tho enemies , of those wnm
out with excemlro bodily or mental effort and atta as a safeguard against exposure.
those who pursue their avocations in tho opt n ah
exceptional powers or enauronce.
IIINB'BI'UIIK IIAIUJSI Jil a m
m weLnnd rlpnrous uenther. ltwlll drlvo all malarious dlseaacs from the vmrm.
Hard workers of every vocation and persons whom a sedentary UK rendera prone to
Dyspepsia nna in i-crnne s i uro uhikj k
Lll nniSKDy A poneriUl lailKUinu. . iid huuiimb on I. n,yvaiD uf vuo La
ui-i un ovrry uoini-i lunvooart-iuiiran
aly7cd thoroHi IUaLur-Mait .Wnis
nur made br II. a J.K- rerrlne andflhii
it entirely frco from fusel oll.tnrlurol,
metals and acids and -Istabsolutelt
pure." Stonra, Camtua Arthw- Mfdler,
Uenna ana Welibaaeti
......n SiilllCV HIT.. lUtl.uUPV
without unduly stimulating tho klilJ
and helper to digestion. rKItltlNK'S
neva Increases their llngKlng activity
counteracts tlio ellccts of fatigue, has
tens convalescence ana is a wnoiroointi
.nil nromnt diuretic. Watch the label 1
i'nodo genuine unless bearing the slgna-
ron MEN ANU CHILDREN
SIXTH AND CHESTNUT,
Vol sine uy all druelils
and grocers throughou
tno umica buiics
37 NORTH FRONT
ST. 38NORTH WATER ST., PHIL
SALE 11Y DllUaaiSTS AND ALL DEALEItS.
Klfv MONEV ! f "" AOKNTM WANTED nt once to supply Ten
ITAJ-X X I I .Minion toiert with tho otiW afllclul Ihes ol
CLEVELAN DZT HURMAN
11 v linn
cartrldgo Uox, ltetorm Trado l'ollcy, c., complete. AkciiIh rcpori
vorK, nppiy quicit ana moKO law to jouu a momn. uuvu 85
m(u, I'uiiaacipma, l'a.
W, V. Ilenscl also Llfo of MrH. Clevelancl i exquisite steel portraits.
inn it-uuri immense gitcrt
UKSAT C'DANCI FOR AOINTS.
fmmenm succett. For bet
C JB. MOBBINS,
Dr. Gale on Diseases of the Kidneys.
V.in.1 wm. TT .T, -! t wlcH b kr. tODS once
a week and you have the fineftt-potiibed stoTO In the
WorU. Yor sale by alt Orocers and Stove Dealers.
Mover Brothers Jobbing Agents, Bloomsburg,
Blaina's Estimate of Judge Thurman-
From "Twenty Y'eare In Congress.''
His rank in the Senate was establ
ished from the day he took his Beat,
and was never lowered during the per
iod ot nis Bervice. Uo was an admir
ably disciplined deoator, was lair in
bis method of statement, logical in his
argument, bomst in ins conclusions,
lie bad no tricks in discussion, no
catch phrasea to secure attention, but
was always direct and manly. Ilia re
tirement from tho Senate was a serious
loss to his partv loss indeed to tbo
body. Uo lett ht-lnnd Imu tliu re
spect of all with whom ho had been as
sociated during his twolvo years of
HCRAKTOH 6 10
Tayiorvlllc o 50
nttston 5 a"
west nttston 6 42
Wyoming 6 47
nennctt 5 55
Kingston 6 S
Plymouth Junction...... 7 o;
riymouth T J0
Nantlcoke. 7 l
Hunlock's . 2
skieieshtnny " 4.
Hide's Ferry... i ?
Ueach Haven, 8 01
rtnarcreet. 8 13
'Wi ioworove o io
IJmoIUdge, s 20
Kspr... 8 2d
Uloomsburg s 33
Rupert 8 37
Catnwlasa 8 '2
Chulasky. o 03
NOK-rncnB.ni.AND...... 9 V3
i;...mi nt mitiprt -with Phlladelnhla ft
Tteadlniltallroad for Tamanend, Timanuo. Will-
i.m.n.,, GnAnn. TnttcvlMe. f-tC At NOrthUHV
berland with P. ft IS. Dlv. 1'. 11. K. for narrlsbnrg.
Lock naven. Emporium, warren, iurrj
i v. nAiJiTKAD. lien. wan..
Dr. (ialo observes in Ins treatiso on
diseaso that the great uso of wino in
g so id ranco is supposed to nave auaicd tno
w nriivnlptipn Af thn. rrrrivnl
in some parts ot ibis aounlry wliere
m I Nnonr a I'nrf. f-Jrnnn Winn la nntininallv
6 23 1 usuu, not oniy tuu gout, out, ino gravel
is scarcely known. JJr. ia l'ota re.
latcs" as an extraordinary instanco of
tho oltects ol hpeers rort Wine on
gout the euro of Dr. Davcran, who was
attacked with it at the ago of twenty-
tmvaiHl had it severely till bo was up
wards of fifty, with chalk stones in tho nlipannr mnl-es nr. Tnnniifnr!tiirGra
ii..t. r i. .. t i,... t.. .a
uu. imuu u uui, 1Ui Tir opc,. )n nnf hllV SI Tlin.nO IB-
four vnars nn'eeedincv tlio timn whpn I K . a
his case had been given to Dr. La Pota lre getting our prices,
Catalogue and Price lists
WINES AND LIQUORS
AND JOBBER IN CIGARS.
By tho following well known makers;
Hallct & Davis.
Can also furnish any of the
to lay beforo tho publio had by advice
8 3t used Hpoers lort Urapo Wino, and
2? I had no return of tho gout afterwards.
5 47 London Post.
23 it you aro expecting to set out an
o orcbard tbis fall a good work can be
SO you feel dnU, languid, low-spirited, life
less, and indescribably miserable, both physi
cally and mentally: experience a senso of
fullness or bloating: after cntlny, or ot "gone
ness, or ompunera ot eioinacu la lao morii
lnir. tnnirua pnard. bitter or bad testa In
mouth, lrretrular appetlto, dizziness, froquent
headaches, blurred eyesight, "Uoatlnff specks"
before tho eyes, nervous prostration or cx-
lrrunomiy or temper, not uusues,
chilly sensations, sharp
bora and there, cole
bltincr. transient rialna
feet, drowelnesa lifter meals, wakefulness, or
disturbed and unrefreahinir fileeD- constant.
Indcscrlbablo fooling ol dread, or of Impend
If you bavo nil. or an; conslderablo Dumber
ot these Bymptoms, you aro suffering; from
that most common of American maladies
1JUI0U8 Dyspepsia, or Torpid urer. associated
with Drsneoslo. or Indlircstlon. Tbo more
complicated, your diseaso bas become, the
(rreater the number and diversity or symp
toms. No matter what stairo It has reached.
Dr. PlercCa liolden Ucdlcnl Discovery
wUl eubduo it. It taken according to direc
tions for a reasonable lonirth of time. If not
cured, complications multiply and Consump
tion of the Lungs. Skin Diseases, Heart Disease,
ltheumatlsm. Kidney Disease, or-other ffrare
roaiaaies aroquiie uaDio roset in ana, sooner
or later. Induce a fatal termination.
Dr. Pierce's floldou Itledlcal Die
eoTory acts powerfully upon tho Liver, and
mrouga laat Kreut uioou-punirinir ortran,
cleanses the system of all blood.ta.lnfa and Im
purities, from whatever cnuso nrlslnpr. It Is
equally emcacious m acting upon tno Kid
neys, and other excretory orgnns. cleansing,
ttrenjrtbenlni:. and bcoltnir their diseases. As
digestion and nutrition, thereby building up
both tlesb and strength. In malarial districts,
this wonderful medicine has gained great
celobrity In curing- Fever and A sue. Chilli and
Tever, Dumb Ague, and kindred disease.
Dr. IMorco'e Goldou Medical Dis
CURES ALL HUMORS.
from a common Dlotcb, or Eruption, to the
worst Scrofula. Salt-rheum. " Fercr-soree."
Scaly or Itougb Skin, in short, all diseases
caused by bad blood aro conquered by this
nowerfuL nurifrlnff. and lnvlirnratlntr medl.
cine. Circa t Katlng ulcers rapidly heal under
Philadelrjhia & Erie R. R. Divis
ion, and Northorn Oentrai
in effect AUG. 5,188s. Trains loava Bannury
I v.wa. in., on. ,-uwiu .... . t - .
Sunday), tor norrlsbure anotnierroraiaisi"u;'
trrlvlnK at Phlladelphla3.15p. m. ; ew Yprk,
j.60 p. m. ; naltlmore, 4.4S p. m. : Washlnsti
viusp. m. conneetlns-at Philadelphia for all Bes
Shore points. Througn passenger cuntu
mil anamitia .
F us n. m. Day. express
dally exceDt8iindayl.forUarrlfbureand Interme
diate stations, arriving-at Philadelphia
..nn m . v-nw vnrir. o n. ni. Baltimore
4.45 p.'m.Vwashtmnon, 8.00 p. m. ButTet Parlor car
Itnrousrn vo rnnaaeiquia uu iHuncuk". D
through to Philadelphia and Baltimore. ,.,,
7.A n. ra. itemivo Aaumuiw.ii-,"
for narrlsbnnr and all Intermediate stations, arriv
ing- at Philadelphia 4.2S a. m. : New York 7.io a. m.
tisitimore. 5.13 .m.; n bpiuubuju 0.0.. ... .... ,
Diillm,,, .laonlnirnrfnim WllllAni,llttO PhUadel-
nhia. rhlladelphta DSRsenirers can remain in
I sleeper undisturbed until 7 a. m.
2.r.oa.ra. Erie Mall (dally) for narrlshurfr and
iniApmt.tii fitattnnq. fln-ivlnir at Philadelphia
9.25 a.m. New York, ll.oa. m. : Baltimore 8.1s
1 a. ra. : wasninffton. w.su a. m. -iiiruuyu i miiiiwi
sleenlnt: cars are run on this trsinto rnnaaeipnia
Daltimore ana wasnington, ana inrounu I'mm-
sercoacheB to Philadelphia and Baltimore,
tin.. mTCrin Mail (daliv). for Erie ard all
Intermediate stations ann canordaigna ara
in,.m&ii.ia otatinna. itnrhester. IlnfTalo and
vtncnrn vniifl. with thronch Pullmsn I'alace
cRra and passeneer coaches to Erie and Hoches-
9.53 News Express (dally except Sunday) for
, mI. n.D.n nnA InfArmnll Ot A ftf.M.10nR-
12.52 p. m. Niagara Kxpress iaauyeiccui.ciuu.
Iny) for Kane andlntermedlateatntlons and Can-
ar.rtalRTia and principal intermediate siauons.
Jone now in preparinc the soil. If
you do not intend to cot out until
curing now is a ccod timo to try and
havo tliem arrive Una fall and then
heel 111. otten a cood opportunity w
offered this month to haul out manure,
and it will certainly pay to improve.-
Thoro is no overstock of reallv good
fruit. It is tbo poorer grades that
havo glutted the markets, bo that there
is no overproduction of the best.
OF THE U.S.
FH ItlCAl MUV1M. IlIMK Mil
TIKH their PUtforma and ItiDclptM. gQMtionJ
01 um notir cm. cirviu. rrsiiiii im. mil r
TARIFF AND FREE TRADE,
rm rtiuiii 11J
tv thn nrnMnt
VAlA Of PAK.
with ajvamentA for tuid w&inst. 04Q jtuea 200
Bright men or women In each Mranty
1 to t&ke orden for thla Donnlar and fiit
MI txuz book. A CTMt tut ibul Bend for rtretuw.
r. w. ziQLu co. 720 cbMUit au ruu. l'A.
JU1T27-Z & CO-4HI.
Mllte- book, i
We are offerinc great inducements to persons desirine
purchase Pianos, Organs and Sowing Machines.
The New Colored Polioeman.
An amug'mfr occurance is reported
. . . .
lrom l'biladelnliia. A newly appoint
ed colored policeman entered a street
TT! rt l
car. ma unuoriu wax Buoiitue: uia
braa buttons shone brightly, and be
carried himself with the air of a Span
ish hidalgo. As be gazed around the
car his glanco fell upon an aged color
ed woman who was carrying home a
groat bag of clothes from the laundry.
The recognition was mutual. "VTiy,
toll de l.ordl sho exclaimed joyously.
"if die aint Eli! Why, chile, ,1
soa'sely knowed ye. How you have
growcu. is do oio man at de alms
Iioubo jet, Jilil lherowasno answ
er to her question. Eli had (led with
an angry expression on hU previously
piaoul countenance. uticaijo Jier-
A Rare Busines Chance.
confidential correspondence desired with reliable
party In tills sect Iou. who can Invest ono Tliou-
Baaa iwuars i.ium. a luniuie iu ti leiv curti kui
anteedtotnortfcht perwm. V&rge and steady In
come from tne start. Huslncss easy, safe and sure
and no former cipcrtf-nce necessary. Full particu
lars oy maiL
Address CH llLES C. MCDONALD.
General roatumco, KewarK, new jersey.
Viscor and Vitality.
Aro quickly given to every part of the
body by HootVh Sareaparilla. Thtt
tired feeling is entirely overcome. The
blood is purified, enriched and vitalized,
and carries health instead of diseaso to
overv organ. Tne stomach is toned
l Wswca miam vorio. itr-
CloCkQt and munlflctM.
Both UJla'nd tat 'Hm
vltk vnrki tnd c4mi ol
qaAl nl o . O U V B O M
taeb loMllljcftD Moan om
rUEK, Uow la Ihli poMlbUt
W MWr we want oat pt
od In Mcb locfclllr. ta kw In
ttMlrhmnM,uil ntjw to tbnMwbo call, teotupkU llosofonr
nluAbUtuid Trr OMfol UUtJHEIIUL.lt NAMPLHH.
TtM aunplM,! Till u Ui fttb.T Mivl few-tod sftar yon
M tty tbam la yonr boms fbr v mouttii ad Bttown tbtn
Ills pnMlbU to tnBk thU rrMt offtr, MDllng tb NOL.ll
SUL.il wktcb nd COHT V umplM fto. u tbhow1n ot
ItM wmpltM la hnr loeUl7( lw;i result la a litgv tri4
u; ftfUr oar aunplM hr tiMQ la locltt j for month or two
vt tuoallT tt from 9KHIU to 0CUUU la trd from tb
arroaadtnc oonntrr. TbU.tbs molt vondrful cSor crtr
koown.ti mtds to ordtr tbn oor MmplM may im ptftOuJ at on
brttMicaa l a, H ow AmHea, WrIUs at orm.atv
aakeartof Ibachanc. Bdr U wUl t hardly my trrraU
lor 700 to Bbow tbaaanplM to thoM wboniaf call at your boras
too your reward iriu moat 4inrcrory, a pwiu rara oa
vbkb to writ ui ooat but 1 ecnl and after yon know all,U yot
lo not ear to to furtlwr, why do bartn ti dooa. But If you da
Nna jour aaam vucv. jvu cu wears rucr. oai oi
tat aolld rold wktcbea la tbo world and oar lrf llatof
L p a ntnri.cnt ya pa,y u aipraaa, rrtlXDi,
IdrmUXO, BTUOOM Oft, IXX I1J, UllMf
arrantad. Haav I r
KSJcA VBlhened. the nppetito restored. eSSffoSSSffiSlM
sffitB-M. llv." ?ro. roused and o'VSLS,
rested lta potency in ourln Tetter. Eczema,
Kryeipeias, uous, uuouncica, nore eyes, Bcror
ulous Sorts and Swellinra, illp-Jnlnt Disease,
Tho healing and soothing properties
of Pond's Extract have met witn uni
vernal and unqualified commendation
from all lining it. Lad it a who havo
never used it will find it to thoir ad
vantage to try it. If they once do so
they will never bo without it again.
Send to Pond's Extract Co., 70 Fifth
Avenuo Now York, for a copy of their
Not so Favorable.
Doaoon William. "Uruddcr Jono,
how did yer son come otun do trial V
Brother Jones. "Do juluo douo
give im two niuufs in the jay til.
ucacon Williams. " rears ter mo
like ns if you ouglitc-r be pow'ful thank-
tui. lie go got oil raii'lity light, he
Brother Jones. '''Twam't s' light's
you seem ter think. Dey a a-gwinter
bang 'im when de two innnfs is np,"
Editor's Drawer, in Harper's Maga
zine lor oeptemuer.
White Swelllnirs." Goltro. or Thick Neck.
and. Enlarged Glands. 6eid ten cenU In
stamna for sl lsrre Treatise, with colored
u&iet, oo DKia uiseasea. or too same amount
or a uTeause on ecroruious irecuonj.
"FOR THE BLOOD IS THE LIFE."
Thorouuhly cleanso It by using Xtr. Pierce1
Uoldeu Medical DUeorery, and good
digestion, a fair skin, buoyant spirits, rltal
iirengtn nna Douuy ncaitu win do tetaDUshod.
which is Scrof nla ortfie LunRs, la arrested
and cured by thla remedy. If taken In the
earlier stages ot the diseaso. From lta mar
velous power oyer thla terribly fatal disease,
when first offering thla now world.famed rem.
edy to tho public. Dr. Tierce thought seriously
ot calling it hi "Consumption Cuitz," but
abandoned that name as too restrictive for
xneaicine wnicn, xrom ita wonacrrui com-
or blood-clcanslng, anti-bilious, iectoral, and
nutrttlTO properties, la uncqualed, not only
m a remedy for Consumption, but for all
vurouic xiiseuM. or tno
novo and intermediate stat ions, and Elmlra, Wat
klns and Intermediate stations, with through pas.
sengercoacnes to lienoTo ana waiaina.
B.20 a. m. sunaay maniortteuuiru uu iuwiwp-
THBOnon TRAINS FOnSUNBirBY FKOMTHK
UAH T AflU bUU A 11.
Dnn.T mnll lrtnvpfl Th11nrtp1nhla 4.S0 B.
rjarrlsburs T.40 arrtvlng at Sunbury S.S0 a. m.wlth
i inrougnsieepingcar irom ruiiaueipuia w
narrlsburg, S.10 a. m. dally except sunaay
.Triolnff.t Rtinhfirr O.U. A.m.
Niagara Express leaves
Philadelphia. 7.40 a. m. : uaitimore t.su a. m. iubuj
I except Sunday arriving at sonbury. 1159 p. m.,
wiininruUKn iiuuei. rariuruariruiu i uiiuD,jjiiin
I and inronsn pawenger coacnea irom ruimuoi.
phla and Baltimore. ,
Fast Line leaves New York 9.00 a.m.! rhlladel
nhia ii win. rti washlnirton. fl.M a. m.: Haiti.
more, 10.45 a. m., (dally except Sunday) arriving at
I nunOUrj. O.SH p. Ul., H.u iiuuuku .jimjdusci
coachesf rom rnnaaeipnia ana iiammore.
Kne Aiau leaves rew i orx b.w p. m. ; ruiiimi-
Ipnia. n.ya p. m. : n iusuiukivu. iu.uu . m. ,
more.ll.2D p. m.,(dally) arrlvlnifat Sunburys.10
with h..nnh TllTnn Rlppiilfii-eftr from
Philadelphia, Washington and Uaitimore and
I f.nrougn passenger coacues iium uimuc.fum.
SDNBlTTtV. flAZl.KTON at WILKKHllAIlHE
ItAIl.ltUAIl Ami ritili rn flnu .n.
(Dally excent sunday.l
wnirHhnm, vaIi leaven Hunbnrr O.ss a. m.
arriving at Bloom Terry lo. a.m., Wlttea-barre
:.isp.m. . .
Kmress East leaves Bunbury S.S4 p. m., arriving
at Hlnnm WrrT aosn.m.. wllkeR-barre 7.65 D. m
' sunburr Mali leaves Wllkesbarre 10.20a.m. arrlv-
I intr nr. nioom verrrii.4S a. m..Knnnury 12.33 p. ra
Express west leavea HiiKes.oarrez.oo p. iu., r-
i riving at uioom rerry .iw p. uu ouuuui o.wy.u.
snn.-iar mall leaves Sunbury 9:55 a. ra.. arriving I
at Bloom Kerry I0:l a. m., wtlkea-Barre 11:45 a.m. I
sunaay accoramoaaiion leaveu iiiieo-umreo.u i
n. m., arriving at uioom rerry, d.sv p.m., ouuuiu,
invigorated. The brain is refreshed,
tho mind made clear and ready for
worK. Try it.
.correspondent says tnat no Dur-
cliased forty acres of farm land in Con
necticut at &7 per aero. One field of
four acrep, soil yellow loam, not sandy,
was thoroughly exhausted; it wonld
not proauco a crop. This neld was
plowed, and half a ton of muriate of
potaHi wero applied to caob acre, and
thoroughly incorporated in the soil by
narrowing, it was planted to corn,
which was carefully weighed when
harvested, and lho yield was fifty.fiye
uutneis to tno acre ol sound corn.
Caveats and Trade Marks obtalned.and all Patent
business) nonrtiipfpil fflrMnnffiTt' wwa
sno-acrpnp.ipfl. ah rmainnaQ
direct, hence can transact rmTent himinpaatn im.
time and at LESS COST than those remote from
Pend model, drawing, or photo.wlth description.
e advise If oatentanle or nor. rrn or i-h.m.
I Our fee not duo tin patentls secured.
A Dook'ilow to Obtain Patents,"wlth referenses
vu auiuai tucuuf lu J OUr SliaiC, COUhty. Or tOWXL
C. A. SNOW & CO.,
uppoaite ratont omce, Washington, D. C
Among the Pianos we handle are the IVERS & POND,
C C. BRIG GS, BA US CO., SCU OMA CKER Gold
p?!f,n"B'S.?: 're8 ot ch"w- String and Overa Pianos. These Pianos are all firBt-filnf,n
and fully warranted for five years.
Our leading Organs are the celebrated JZSTEY. MILL
ER, UNITED ST A TES and other raaes.
A Mmie Trifle. Mamma. 'V hat's
tho raattor, precious! Mabel, you
naughty child, what have yoii been
doing to your poor little Bister!"
Aiauei (virtuously and Ueliantlv).
Mamma. ''"Sou have! I know vou
Mabel. "I only told her she's got
to die somo day, and slio Bays the
nuns science of
'-LlJFB, the gruat
Medical Work of the
age on Msnhood,Nerr-
oni nd physical De
bility, rrematura D.
KNilW TUVOC C cllncErrorsofYoath,
IWII f III Vklil 1
taeunwiiaent fhereon, soo iges g va, 1S5 pre.
s..i.u..ua 'uru Uigurs, JU)n, lull gui, only 11.110,
Our leading Sewing Machines are the celebrated IF 77 TTTZ.
NE W DA VIS, NE TV DOMESTIC. NE W HOME,
ARD ROTARY Saving Machine, the finest nnd best
rtotary toewmg Machine in the world.
Before nurchasinr' write for CatsilnrmPR to .T. RAT,rT7.F,P'R
PALACE OF MUSIC AND GREAT SEWING MACHINE
DEPOT, Main St., Bloomsburg, Pa.
i:.o d. m.
chas. K. pron.
j. it. woon.
Oea. J'asoncivr Agenj I
Liver, Blood, and Lungs.
For Weak Lungs, Spitting of Blood. Short
ness ot llreath, Cbronlo Nasal Catarrh, Bron
chitis, Asthma, Severe Coughs, and kindred
affections, It It an efficient n-medy.
Bold br Druggists, at 1.00, or BU BotUei
(ST Bend Un cents to. (tarn pa (or Dr. Iterce'
book on iwnaumpuon. Aaarcta,
JVorli's Dispensary Medical Association,
069 Kalu SU BUFFALO. N. V.
I FR EE!
. It Bvd my ChiM'i
"When my child ins ham,
tht doctor ordered ons of th
Other roods. Sas its thst nn.
Wilis nesrly dlod. Ihsdthrua
doctors, who said tht trouble
ra Indigestion, sud ordered
tha food cLaw&I to LacUted
Food. It ssvod my child's llfs,
and I cwf you msny thsnis
for tt I renrd your Food ss
Invtlu&ble, and sajvrtor to all
C-U.tr trUacUI food for Ubles,
1:,.., Mas. A. t. Cuntu,
FOR INFANTS and MALfo$
THE PHYSICIAN'S FAVORITE,
Imm muir ImrcrUnt Attrintoffcs
W9t all tther j'rviami t'wli,
0 ABIES CRY FOR IT
INVALIDS RELISH IT.
Perfectly Nourishes n Bob with
or without the addition of milk.
Threo 8lle. 230. OOo. SI.OO.
Avitashla psmplilet cm "Tti Nutrition
It n No Equal.
"Ws sre uatrur In our nsr.
try (oontslutng forty InfsaU)
your lcUU-d Food, and find
It I sr suirior to all other food
vhlch has been used daring
the pan ten years that I hsn
been visiting- i-tiytoclsn, Tht
Slaters of Chanty, vho hart
chars-e of tht iutltuuon, tsy
it has no ojuu.
Descriptive of the Moll, Climate. TrotlBttUm, I
.llnnulnnui-liiK Industrlrii ana .inurrni m raiin i
Drrirmuin ana otner ooutnern eiuu-s. nnvoui
W. B, EB'1LI nenl rasa, Agent,
Enclosing 8-cent Stamp
DR. T HEEL
fcTO norm roairiB oirecu
n.ia Or. an. MilladaUkl- . tltk
cnets gBtravntrca U ear a yo nor
tjutaktr, aaJair aa4 ptrautatir Ub any
raaiaruaui loiticiao, na uaiiar oao na
najta) frouwbat Cell b T4aaMd,
r ithal ha maala.lm La Tkul
ctfara UtM la aor adfartialia Lkiaialaa
(MalTal platUta), mix caa cieal bin U iba orrt
dlatBoalac ul aaMaufil iraatoatot of aU Tai-afcl
AND BLOOD POISON,
ousti.vati: in.cr.iiN. HLOTnira,
:itllTIO.NH. llMI'I.rN, SHKI.U
Ilnrly Dt-euy, l'lilral nutl Meiilul
1'roaimlliiu, Hrloiichollii, Illudiler
mid Hldiier l)lcie". (Acuta cases 4 19
.,.) bu.i .1 o.. aiv mii'romi
tcisUBlns tht Atlo4thttf, Domal0.lt CdlMUt t Rslt&ls
ijtttiua tt tualioliM. the ooly oe Luawa bator
1 1'vBcrtrairci wiia tvtrr ritksxlT aal
i . fur tjuUkiat rtMTrjr ta prtu
Xt. Z. Di Comer, 51 P.,
CtaclnnftU. OUa. . ,
LWELLSfRICHARDSON & CO., BURLINQTON,
B,kl eutm TL. ......I Aam .rnku, allrftJ.
V.u).f , uU4I-4 nl li u.t triit r Mil fwl tK
Tratb. iiwm1o fnnll. Ibuir tcbunM t ileilsUM
IIB,WI Ikawtnt. sr dU.pplltfll fcf aitckl.thr
tlctlt( ui Ijlsf 4rrtUnRU u v.ll M thMftUln.
lug u t it ru irri.BvU.tt thty do tot pwu.
but still 1b 1st Uctt&lnl till .tit nokty.Mt-irtaj tfit d
l.r. Uiar.,t-l.t-. w.4cw4i; ul tnuUi Iiulsu
Direct from tho Front.
Knoxville, Tenn., July 3, iSBS.
The Swift Specific Co., Atlanta, Ga.:
Gentlemen I can cheerfully and truth
fully say that S. S. S. is the ereatest blooj
purifier on earth. In 1884 I contracted
blood poison. 1'hvsictans treated me with,
no good results. I took a half dozen differ
ent kinds of blood medicines, but, without
receiving any permanent relief 1 I was In.
duced to try S. S, S. I beffan the first
bottle with the gravest doubts of success.
I had been so often deceived. But im
provement came, and I continued Its use
until perfectly well. I have since married,
and have n healthy family. No trace of the
disease Is seen. Swift's Specific did all
this for me, and I am grateful. Yours '
truly, j. s. Strader.
US Dale Are.
Kr.MP, Texas, June 3, i833.
The Srrfft Seclnc Co., Atlanta, Ga.;
Gentlemen A sixteen.year-old son of
mine was afflicted with bad blood, and broke
out with an eruption on various parts of his
body. I put him to taking S. S. S., and a
few bottles cured him entirely. I live at
Lone Oak, but ray post-office Is at Kemp,
lours truly, W. S. Kobinsom.
Three books mailed free on apnlivatlon.
All druggists sell S. S. S.
The Switr Sitcino Co.,
Drawer Atlanta, Ga.
New York, 756 Broadway.
AND SHORTHAND INSTITUTE
pur patrons enter our elegant new tmilJP.nr
wbkn mil be completed tlds fill. Our prttoperliy
arWn from tho thorough practical tralnfnir in
book-keeplne. Shorthand, Typewrltlnir. and all
other branches nf llt.'MINK.sHVnilTnin-i7lu
School of Commerce JAlleu Uuslueua Collevel
LLEit, rrea. " '
and muldle-aged men. bVnd now. The Gold an3
Itwelled Medal awarded to the author by the NtUon
al Medletl Association. Address P.O. Hot las3,liot-
. ' . iu Aiin.ms, Krauoaie oi liar,
vard Medical College, ss years' practice In Borton,
1 llnlnnch bL Soeclalty. Diseases of Man.
Cut 1I1I1 out. Vou may never tee It anulo.
BUS 31.0-1 1.
F. F. ADAMS & CO.,
Do Your Own Dyeing, at Home, with
PEERLESS DYES ! TOBACCO
They will dyo everything. They are sold every
where, l'rlco lee. a package. JU colors. They
have no eminlfnr Rtrr.nc.th hHt,tnMd
In pacltagea. or tor f astnesa of cofor. or n'on.fadloB
qualities. Tner do not eriu-k-nr mnt i.-nr.niS
t iiiua. aim dan, u. wcrcer, icnuriy.
Y-AiNwmuur & CO.,
1KA8, syRO 1-8, COFFEE, fiUOAIt, MOLASSE1.
oxs.'-oiH 'vaoj BUYom 'moijj 'hoik
N. E, Corner Betonl and Arch Sta.
WOrdera win receive prompt attentnoi
lii,,.?.irf"J'lf "i"h "anoiU ltmltlll..ci
stlluUoutl W Htuuwi to pwullu to thJlr ki, VLoulI
r-.H'fPS' SHPiJ?1.';6'8 Celebrated
FEMALE REQULATINQ PILLS.
tnamliicl. btatbTnitll,Mun,lf tttlwl.tl. AJdr4
IJ A I r Dai b a mm
CImdk, and beaulifict tht hair.
I romolei a luiurlnt crowlh.
Nttr Fs ill l R..T... n...
"lelo Its Vo.thful Coltr. '
rntvenu llknn... ... j
W fcnr, 11 OQfctnni
Sole agents ot the fol-
Alexander Bros, I Co,
WHOLESALE DEALERS IN
FRUITS AND NUTS.
SOLE AGENTS FOR
FItESU EVERY WEEK.
AS FOLLOWS ;
crTrS'KflSrIrr.cm'd' ne,w rlu
Dyspepsia, Constipation, Sick
And nil diseases arising lVom a
Torpid Liver and Bad Digestion.
Tho natural remit la irootl onpctlto
nil nulid rietU. Dote muallt cliVuuV;
If suar coated and eaty to tt nlloiT.
uJ SOLD EVEIIYWHEEE, J
AOENT FOR THE
KEYSTONE DYNAMITE POWDER CO.
jof-nufuctraerj of the celebrated Keystone Dyna
mite. Thlaeinlnsiralatrtiltiir iit.i.m.1 ,.',.!:
The undersigned hartne put hli Planing if
n Railroad street, In nrst-ciasa condition, U pre
aredtodo Mlkindiof work In nla line,
FRAMES, SASH, DOORS,
nrntsned uv reauuuuu.o trices. All lumber use
a well seasoned and none but skilled workmen
ESTIMATES FOR BUILDINGS
furnished on appl'ioaUon.
'Wa QttOtaUOM.cbowtuJiKfTeu, (Aug 1ST