i; . Sdvcftislrig' fate in in im eu it ooMneh lion liw ism iw (so Twolndires. inn i nn .no bod lino Throo incbwi 4.x i " T.oo 1l.no t n rour Inches s.no 9 on 1,1(0 tiu ouartr.r column.... im h.iii lo.i is.co iisim Hair column law lion ir.uj mm una column iw.oo avoii taiu um Iimivj Yoorlr advertisement mv.iblo nuartorlr. Trail- tent advertisements mutt bo iuM (or before Kivru-d eicept where parties have aivimnw. i Legal Advertisements two dollars per Inoh for thrre Insertions, and at that rato for additional insertions without reference to length. Xjorntor's, Administrator's, and Auditor's no'.uvw three dollars. Must bo paid for when Inserted. Transient or Local notices, ten centa a line, rr-gulas advertisement half rates. Cards In the ''Bustnes.i Directory" column, on . Tho.fobblntf department et thocotounnml tnr .ULUM1UUJI complete, and our Job Printing will compare faiora. P EliWETjIi, 1 . . blywlthlhatot tholartrccltlca. All work dono on J. K. BITTBM3EMDER f"lprieten. demand, ncatlr and at moderat prloca. 1 ' " 1-"ti I r BL0()MSBU11G,PA., FRIDAT, DECEMBER 16, 1881. Till! COIiUM II IAN, VOL. XV, NO. fin UUI.UjniliA U1SMUUKAT, VOL.XLVI, NO, 11 Tle doltiiq'bi&q. Ml l MBlA PMOCBAT, STAR Or TTtR NORTH, And COLOI MAN, CO.VSOLlPATln.) tipd Weekly, rtrry Prlilny tnnrnlni, nl MLOOMSIIUMI, COLUMBIA COUNTY. PA., t f t 0 iwm.am per year, M cents ihicount allowed yhi iV.ud In advance. To subserltinrs out ot the ( omit tho terms aro M per your, strictly In advance. rrN'ti paper discontinued except nt thn option of . , .lulilljhcrs, until all arrearages nro paid, tut ioiu 'in lined erf tilts will not Imirlven. M V papers; sent out of thostntoor to distant toxl of.it .niustw paid for In advance, unions h renVin. Pililr iH'raon In Columbia county nssumos to pay tho sutiscrlpllon duo on demand, jflb rtWTAflK Is no longer exacted from subscribers In yUia cuonty. W i JrOTaT' l-J l.T.Trrrr-KTra. IcV IP I W 111 P I H II ritOFESSIONAL OAitns. p u, ukockwayI """ A T T 0 It N E Y-A T-L A W, '' ColCmiuan Ilcit.biNo, Bioomsburg, Pa. MembT 0( the United States Law Association, Collections ro.nle in any part of America or Kuropo. K VUMl, AUoi'noynt'ljaw. 0tr.ee, second floor from IM National Dank, utooMSDuna ta. N T U. FUNMC. Attoi'neyat-Law, ULOOMSDUItO, PA, omcj in Knt's Uuiluiku. c. 15 A V.J,nUfMCALEV, ATTOUNIIYS-AT-LAW, Bloombturs, Pa offci on Main Street, first door below courtUouir TO'iN M OI.AIUC, ATTOl!XBY.AT.r.AW, tiloomabvirtr, n. ll.lct- over SeU'iylcr'3 Hardware Store. TI. UTTI.K. E ATT()HNByy.AT.I,AV, ItloomsburBi Pa. ATTOUNEY-AT-LAW, oniceln llrower'B bnlldlnc, second floor, room No. 1, Tiloomsburg, ra. FRANK 5CAHR, Attornoy-nt-3 jfxw. HLOOMSBUItCl, PA. omco corner of Ccntro and Main Streets. Clark's llttlldlnK. Can bo consulted in Gorman. K. CI I A PIN, ATTORN EY-AT-LAW. llMIO.HXIHItHJP., May be found In KECOUllER'S OFFICE In the Court House. i-ept.18, 'Sl,6-m. qiot."k7"kiavicli, ' attorn ey-at-law, New Columbian Hcildino, llloomsburg, Pa. Member of tho United SUtcs Law Association. Collections tnado In any rart ot America or Europe 8. KKOKIl. L. S. WIKT1RSTHK. Notary Public KNOUIt & WINTEUSTEEN, A 1,1 ornoys-at-Law. Ofllcoli llnrllnau's Illock, Corner Main and Slar ket streets, llloonibburff, Pa. 8"'f'"it,v "'' bounties Collected. tAUL ' KT, AUoinev-at-Law. omcelnHrowcr's lf . one door below Urockway Bulldluu HLOOMS Ulta, PA. UY JACOHY Attoi'ii' ; it-Law, iii.ooMsiii.ua, omco In II. .J. flail. .iKniKiInt;, second floor, Hofrman'B Hour and ft i-1 si nut Oct. s, '80. T II. MAIZE, ATTORN EY-At LAW JUSTICE OF THE PEACE Oflleo In Mrs. street. Enfa Building, tblrd dcor from Main May no, 'Sl. 4 IT. OSWALD, A. Attov noyat-LaWi Jackson HuilditiR, Rooms -1 and C, Mayc, Sl HERWICK.PA. M. I. KYEKLY, ATTOUNEY-AT-LAW, Catawlssa,Pa, colloetlons promptly made and romlttod. Offlco opposite Catawl.iaa Deposit llauk m-3a tst" ii. miAWN, 'ATTORN EY-AT-LAW, catawlssa, Pa. OfUce, corner ot Tlilrd and Main Ptrcota. A L. FRIT., Altnrney-.it Law. Ofiice , In llroekwaj'HllulWlntr, uno 'i, '81. P-i? Curif, Pi 1IUCKINOIIAM, Atlorney.ftt.Lnw. Of fice, llrockwni's DulldlnK let, floor, Illooms- Pcnu'a. may 7, 'SO-t f c, U. BARK LEY', Attorney-aU.aw. Office lo Urower's bulldlntr, 2nd story, ltooras 4 & 6 J B. ROBISON, Attornoy-at-Law. in nartmaii'a building, Main street. Office D U. WM. M. ItEHER, Surgeon and Physi cian, omco Market atrect. Near depot. R. EVANS, M. D Surgeon and Physi clan, (omce and itesldencu on Third street B. McKELVY, M. D., Burgeon and Phy sician, north sldo Mala street, below Market. D R. J. C. BUTTER, PHYSICIAN fiStmUEON, omco, North Market Btrect, Uloomsburg, Pa. Oct. 1, T9. D R. I. L. R A IS IS, TRAOTIOAL DENTIST, Main Street, opposltu Episcopal Church, Dlooms' durg.Pa. Teeth oxtracted without rain, Oct. 1, J87. W. II. HOUSE, BLOOMSBURG, COL. 00. PA. All styles of work dono In a superior manner, work warranted as represented. Tkkto Kxtbact kd without Paid by tho uso of Oas, and freeot chargo vtlicn artlQclal teeth are Inserted, omco over Illoomsburg Banking Company, Jo be open at all hours during the day, Nov.ss.iy MISCELLANEOUS p M. DRINKER, GUN and LOCKSMITH. Sowing Machines and Machinery of all kinds re- aired. OrxiiA Hocsii Building, Blooinsbarg, Pa. TVVID LOWENBERQ, Merchant Tailor xj Main St., abovo Central llotol. I, B. KUIIN, dealer in Meat, Tallow, etc., centre streot, botween second and Third, JAMES BEILLY, Tonsoviul Artist, hu 013 stand under EXCHANGE 110 J,,."1?. WK8T-OLASS UAKBElt F '"I Ho respectfully bollclts tho patronage of TTy 16 so-tf puouo generuuy, EXCHANGE HOTEL. w. U, 'TUBBS, PROPRIETOR BLCOUSBURCr. TA. orroniTU couitr house. J;arB and eonvcnlont samplo rooms. Bath rooms --" nuiir, uuu un inoueru oouvonieuMi The Backus "Wafor Mo'or mil ih Tin: most Economical Power Known -FOH- DIUV1N0 LIGHT MACHINERY. It lakes but.llttlo room. It never gets out ofjropalr. It can not blow up. It needs no fuel It ncedi no englnoer. There Isno delay; no tiring up; no ashes to clean away; no extra iDWranco to pay; no repair ing necessary; no cool bills to pay, and It Is alwajs ready for use. It Is Invaluable for blowing Church Organs, for running rrtnt ng prcaws, Sewing Machines. Turn ing I-atheB, Scroll Saws, Orlnd Stones Coffee Mills, Sausage Machlui-s, I'ted Cutters, Corn Mills, Leva tors, etc, Pour horse power at to pounds pressure ot wa.er. Ills noiseless, neat, compact, steady, and above all IT IS VERY CHEAP. send for circular to the Dackus Water Motor Co., Newark, N, J stating name of paper you saw ad vertisement In, Price, $15 (of 3oo, Sept. so-tf B. F. SHARPLESS Cor. Centre and Kali Hoart Sts., near L. & 1). Depot. Lowest Prices will not bo undorsold. Manufacturer ot MINE CAH WHEELS, coal Ilrcak cr and Bridge Castings, WaUr Pipes, Staves, Tin ware, Plow?, IKON PENCE, and all kinds of Iron and Draas C stings. Tho 1 glnal Montrose, Iron beam, right hand lelt hand, and side hlU Plows, the best In tho mark et, and all kinds of plow repairs. cook Stoves, Koom Stoves, and Stoves for heating stoies, chool houses, churches, ic. Also the larg est stock of repairs for city stoves, wholesale and rcUill, such as Klru Urlck.Gratcs, Cross Pieces, Lldi &c. tc, Stovo Pipe, Cook Boilers, Sktlltts, Cake Plates, large Iron Kettles, ISO gallons to IX barrels) farm Bells. Sl'd Soles, Wagon Boxes, ''Allentown Bone Manure" PLASTEH, Al.T, te AC. Jan 9, 'so-ty L T. SHARPLESS, WHOLESALE AND RETAIL UBALEH IN STAPLE AND FANCY NOTIONS HU stock comprises Scarlet, White and ,Mlxtd UlSTDEBWE for Ladles, dents and Children, Cotton, Merino, ana Woolen I10SIEKY, Ladles' Nubias, Hoodl and Oloves, Laco and Embroidered Collars and Tics, Plain and Fancy Neckwear, SCARFS, TIES, and Bows, Ladles and Gents pics, Earrings, COLLAR AND GUFF BUTTONS, and Chains, dents Castor, Buck and Kid, lined and Unllned GLOVES and MITTENS, LAUNDKIED AND UXLAUSDMBD SIIIKTS, COLLARS AND CUFFS, Shoulder Braces and Suspenders L'nnlUaii Jackets, BlueShlrts and Overalls, Alpaca, uitujlum and Cotton Umbrellas, Writing Paper, Envelopes, PENCILS and CRAYONS, Flour Sacks, Grocer's Bags, and WRAPPING PAPER. To arrive, a variety of Corsets, Including Dr. Warner's Flexlblo hip and HEALTH CORSETS- Making h's purchases as he does of manufacturers and their agents he proposes;to mako prices that wlilcomparo favorably with the best CITY HOUSES. Hi. T- SHAEPLES3, BLOOMSBURG, PA. Oct. SS Nl t-f FALL AND WINTER CLOTHING -)o(- A. J. EVANS, Tho uptown Clothier, has Just received a tine lino ui pitsw uuuui, tiiiu is I'll pun U II1UKU UJI FALL AND WINTER SUITS For Men and Boys In the neatest manner and latest btyles. GENTS' FURNISHING GOODS, I-TatSi Cnps. &o Always on hand. Call find Examine. EVANS' BLOCK Corner Main and Iron streets, SIiOOXVTSSUZLO, FA. PLUMBING, GAS PITTING, STOVES and TIInWARE. E. 33. BEOWER Has Durchascd IheSto- k and Business of I. Hacen- buch, and Is now pirpared to do all kinds of work in ins line, riumomg nna ucs inui g ukpcciuuy. Tinware, Stoves, In a great variety. All work dono by EXPERIENCED HANDS, Main Street corner of East, iiLoo.Msmmr;, pa. N. S. TINGLEY. Announces to I hu public that he la pit-pared tot all kinds of Custom Tailoring, promptly and at reasonable prices. Now Is the sea son for a -NEW SPRING SUIT- And Tlngle ' thn place to get a proper fit, Satisfaction Guaranteed. Shop over Blllmeyor'a Oroccry, Corner ot Main and iciuro suct-ia, BLUOMSBUKO, PA. fjMlKAB BROWN'S INSURANCE AQKK. 1; cv. Uoyer s new building, Main stroet, Blooms uurg, ru. Asaets. A'.tnn insuranro Co , ot Hartford, Conn, iT.0T9.W4 itoyai of Liverpool,,, la.Mo.ooo Inncasiitro iu.oki.goo Fire Association. Philadelphia 4.ias,tit PlKontx, of London , , n.w-n.an London LancntJilre, of Englaud,,. ,, l.lov.vm llartforl of Hartford s.vrs.ooo Springfield Flrv utul Marine ,Ob,s Ai tho ajeucles ate dlitct, rt-lhlr oie Miltu mfo the Insured wihout any ft tj in tie (nee uioomsuiirg, r, vf, l PPBSfll Neuralgia, Sciatica, Lumbago, Backacho, Sorenoss of fho Chost, Gout, Quins, Sore Throat, Swell'ngs and Sprains, Burns and Scalds, Gonoral Bodily Pains, Tooth, Ear and Headache, Frosted Feet and Ears, and all other Pains and Aches. No Preparation nn earth equals St. Jacob On. as a i'r,ri',lm;ifnaml thrnp External Itemed-. A trial ciiliilh but the comparatively trilling outlay of no i'rniH, mid every olio MUUrlni; with pain can have cheap anil ltlve proof of Its claluu. Iilrecllinu lu l'.lcven Uinguage'. BOLD BY ALL DRUOQISTS AND DEALERS IN MEDIOINK. A.VOGELER & CO., Jlrtlflinnrr, Jftf., V. 8. A. GREAT GERM DESTROYER. DARliVfi PROPHYLACTIC MID Pitting of SMALL POX Prevented. Ulcers punned and healed SMALL POX ERADICATED. Gangreno preveUed and eureu. Ds senary cured, wounds healed rapidly, bcurvey cured In short time. Contagion destroyed. mck uooms pvinea ana mado pleasunt. Fevered and Mck pet sons' iTetter dried up. ii. is penccuy narmiess For sore throat It Is u sure cure. reiieveci aim rerresncu by bathing Willi I'rophy lastlc Fluid ndded to the water. Soft Unite Complexions DIPTHERIA PREVENTED. iwuureu vy us uso in bathlnir. Impuro ulr made har.n- le-s ana nurinen liv sprinkling Darby's Fluid about. To purify tho breath. Cholera dissipated, ship Fever prevented by Cieanso the .Teeth, It1 can't bo surpassed. Catarrh lelleved and us une. In cases of death In the cured. Erysipelas cured house, it should always be us,eil about thecorpse Scars prevented. . unpleasant smell. UUIU1 iUUCteu lUllUlillir. U will nmi'iint nnv iteinoves an unpleasant An Antiiinm (nr Animal OdOM. or egctable Poisons, I stings, xc. SCARLET UtlUKvI uil.l Ulllllliui ui sickrooms nud hoiplt i als removed by Its uso. "" lYfcLI.OW FEVEII KKADICATED PEVR CURED. In fact It Is tho great DISINFECTANT AND l'UHIFIEU rni i-AiiKi) nv J. H. ZEILIN & Co., MANUKACTl'MNIlClUMISTi,: SOLC PKOl'KI E TO KS. C. 33. SAVAGE, DKALEK IN Silverware. Watches, Jewolry.Clocc .&c All kinds of WatchcB. clocks and Jewelry nea' ) repaired ana warraniea. may u, io-ii Ni'iiraluiii, Sprains, I'iihi In tin- liar! nml Hldo. T.'ieie 1-t ii"ililtig iimw p- lnful than thes disease.; but th i I n moved and the dU-jso cured - . r'orry Dnvls' Pain Killer. Tht-i ri-nit-ily In inl : ilienp llontlna or l'rtri)l4Mitn pntitucl Unit iiiui.t hu kept anay fi-niu llro ir 1i(-iit tu uviilil ilnuger tif cpliiMluii, lutr 1a It nn untried export nifiit that may do inoir harm tliun gourt. Pnln Klllor lna been In cc.ist.int uso for forty years, and Up u lv rsal testimony from all parts ot th wuld Is, It novor falls. It not only i-r.ectsa lK-imaneut cure, but It rellevi s pain oliuost Instantaneously. Being n purely table rcuudy, It Is sate In the hands . f tho m st Inexperienced. The record i.f tuna by tho Uso ot Pain Kiu.hu would llll viluins. The following extracts trnm l.-f -rs ri civet! show what those who have Ul d K U.lnl.i Edjar Cady, Ov.utcnna, Minn., says : About II i - U'Xi lll lli Ik.-c.uiii) HUuJoct to urn-re ik' fi-niu iheiimatli-in our wort v-i t I " i'.vri Kili Lit, UU h njtolilr rollaietl h.u Charles Paw I v H:i! from the Sailors' Home, London: I had ly-t-ii allLU'Usl tliru- ymw with netirftlida and viulunt-i'tumiHuf tin- Htninali 'Iht-ilnctora at Wwtliitii-t' r UoiMttl -u,u up my rami lu deapalr. 1 Irl 1 your 1'ain Kili iii.uimI 11 ma nio Ualncill-tu llllfcf. I havi rrirntheil 111 V tmigtri. au I uiu lion ftblo to f lluw my uaurd ncruiiaUoii. a. II. Walworth. Eaco,Me,,W!ltes: I eilt-riclu't'd llnlraillutu ll-litf trolil lain m tha aide by ttiu 1 1 ) our Pais Ku.leh. I.York Baya; I h&euiti!i!)our 1'in K11 1 rit forrtieuumtlrni, fc ami hate rf-micd Krt-ut Uuillt. Barton Seaman says ; Hate uM l'is Kil l Lit fnf tlilrtj- jian". and liata found It a titKiyuiOf j itituly for rheilinatlHiii ami Imueuead. Mr. Burdlttwzltes: It nt t r r'tiiu ttttrlt o n lit-f In raam rt rht'iiniLUi-lii. Phil. QUbert, Somerset, Pa., writes : Prom actual uw, know our Pain Kii i ni la the beat meJItluu 1 tan Ktt. All drugglsta keep Pain Kiit.tu. us puce O so lotT that It Is wllhln tho reach of all. ind It A 111 savo many times Its cotl lu doetni WU 3Sc, SOc. and 81.00 a bottle. I TERRY DAVIS & SON, Proprietors, Provldonco, ft. I. B. V. 1IARTMAK Kiratsikis THK ioiiwimi AMKUIOAN INSURANT!. CO.ll'ANlUS I.ycoinlugof Miincy Piii.n'-ylianta. North, American of 1'hlladuiphla, Pa, rranlsllu ot " " Pennsjlvanla ot " " Farmein of York, Pa. Hanover of New York, Manhattan of Now Voii. Ofllw on Market btr't, Vo 3, Mcvmsburg oct, , t.iy 0 i:0ll(li: J:. MMO.V, AU'y at J.utr, VARIIlNaTON. J). C. D.inH Ctri.tP'l nrillr.lli-1 fill l'1-l.lllllln.tt-f I'v.lhli.iillnn and Opinion us tuPutentabllltv.ftir wilch mninrge Is made. If reported patentiiLIf) no 1 harpo f or nor- vice3 Truss ntitttaaiui, ntuti lur pampiiii-i ot in timet Ions. KSTAIILISIIKI) In IWJ i dec. 'Mw PATENTS Poetical. TIIK Fllllll.KI'. Somttlmes It jou listen listen When the sunlight fades M gray, You will hear a strange miisliian At tho quiet close of day ; Hear n strange ond quaint muilclan on hMnlirllMolccd flddlo play, tie bears a curious flddlo On his coat ot shiny blank. And draws tho bow acres tho string In rrcWccs and In crock ; Till tin sun cllmbsup the lnoiiutnl.t And Hoods tho earth with light, You will hear this slrango musician I lu) lug-playing nil tho night 1 Sometimes underneath the hearth stone, Sometimes uudcrneath tho floor, He plays the tamo shtlll music, Plays the same tune o'er and o'er ; And sometimes In tho pasture, Beneath a cold gray stone, Hu tightens up tho sinews, And llddlos all alone t It may bo In the autumn, I-'rom the corner of your room You will hear tho shrill-voiced flddlo sounding out upon tho gloom i If jou wish to seo llio player, Softly fellow up tne sound, And jou'li 11 nd a daik backed cricket Fiddling out a merry round 1 Henry IHiIcij Don in ) 'uiilh't Cbniianion. VUHXS 01' TIIK SKA. Wakeful I lay, ntnlgnt, and hoird Tho pulsing of tho restless sea.J Tho inoaningsurges founded Uko dirges From bo.no far back eternity, Whoso spirits from tho diep aro stlrr'd. Awaking with the morning light, Again I l.slened to tho Boa ! But villi its surges Wo heard no dirges, But only llfs's activity! Morning d spilled the glo .m ot nlgit. At noon 1 sauntered forth to view 'fho throbbing of Hut living sja ; still It was surging, But only urging All men to be both strong nnd free Strong In the soul, with conscience truo. At closing dayonco more I stood, (lazing ucross that mighty bcu j Par ships were sailing j The light was falling ; Time, lost In Immortality. It Is the mind, and nottln place. Our moods, and not a var) lug vole J, That tills n Ith sadness, Or thrills with glidnos, A soul with one great ruling choice Ucllects In all things Its own face. Select Story. "CLEOPATRA.'' ni:w UKANcit or tup. i-oitai. sntvici:. A short time since the London Tele graph, which is always saying somn- tlniig to get somebody into trouble, pub lished' an article relative to the engross ing partiality which the domestic cat leels lor its home, its vehement yearning return thither when circumstances over which it 1ms no control have resul ted in its transfer to unfamiliar localities, mid all that sort of tiling, winding up by giving an interesting account ot how cer- ain eminent Dutch naturalisls had util ized Grimalkin as a letter carrier made sort of carrier-pigeon of tho cat in fact. Of thirty-seven cats carried miles from their native village and turned loose with letters tied around their necks not 011c tailed to get back to the starting point in time. Well, young .Mr. 1 illmgliastt, out on West Hill, read this article, and a ro mantic conception occurred to him right on the spot. While ho was burning a limited ipiantily of old .fudge Dieflien baugh's g.is and just ruining Miss HieiT- eiibatiglis bangs that evening, he told Mil - DielTenbatigh all ab mt it. Happy scheme! born 01 loves emergencies. Mr. Tillinghast would carry Klfrida's beloved maltese homo with him that night. The next evening, when the stars were shining, and the presence of the old .Judge, returned from circuit,for- bado (Jliirence about tho premises, the maltose home returning would bear,bound to its neck by a silken cord, a memo- nudum of Clarence, his undying affec tion, and one thing another Clarence loved thu maltese for its mis tress sake; but it 1 11st e.illed for all the love he had in the warehouse before ho got it home, Tho maltese was one of the fiery, untamed Ukraine breed ; blue is smoke, with a tail liken second growth bologna sausage, and weighed about twenty three pounds. Its name was Uleopatra. It was really a Mark Antony cat, but -Miss 1 'Hteubaugh called it Uleo patru because it was such a pretty name. ou can never tell whether a cat has a right to vote or not by tho name a girl gives it. Air. I illiiighii-.l tucked the cat under his coat a well as ho could, but the cat stuck out fore and aft. Vainly ho strug gled with it, bowsprit or spanker would stand out 111 spite ot him. And when lie was about halt way homo ho met a group of friends, ladies and gentlemen, returning from some festive and cxpon hive ice cream saloon. They accosted him, and ho had to let go with onu hand to lilt his hat, and as ho did so Uleopatra . i . 1 1 ... 1 1 , . jjoi ins neiui 0111 aim yeueu lor iresn air in a tone that blighted the lilacs and threw one of the ladies into hysterics, Appalled by tho fearful sound and its terrible conseiiiieni'i', -Mr. Tillinghast was burning on, when one of tho gen tleinau collared him and told him that in his opinion it was a verv biutakcow ardly trick, and one that no gentleman would bo guilty ol, and I10 believed Mr, Tillinghast never would havo done it had he not been intoxicated, and ho would expect an explanation and apoloiiv from I. .. ...1 , 1 mm wneii lie was souer. (neatly depressed in spirit, Mr. Till ini'iiast pursued ins homeward way, Cleopntia occasionally clawing his ribs in a maniier that indicated an early grave. Often the eiratiu eccentricities of Cleopatra compelled tho young man to weep aloud, but thev reached homo at hist. Cleopatra curled up on tho foot of tho bed and purred Inmsell to sleep with thu calm content of a cat that had made a substantial lunch of thu human ribs. and Mr. Tilliuglnst sat tip tho gieater part 01 tho night writing a letter lull ot poetry, and bathing his lacerated body. Next evening ho mado ready to sen'd 1.! . 1 1 1 .... ... ... 111s iiit-HM-ugei miine. 111 inner 10 in crease the cat s "vehement yearniiiL'" return home, Mr. Tillinghast had fed it nothing during tho day, and Cleopatra in tho frenzy of hunger, Ind chased im aginary rats about the room until there wasut lutt in it aplee.'of fragile furiii tuio big enough to break attain. Tho only thing that wasn't scratched was tho coiling, mid tho only thing that wau broken was the hammer. "If," said Mr. Tillinghast, holding his lacerated hands in a bath of water and sodn, after tying his letter caiefully aioiind Cleopatra's neck with a blue lib- bon, "if your 'yearning' to return home is one half so vehement as initio is to have you return thither, you will bo in the lap of your angelic mistress beforo 1 can clo.se (hiii door ngain. Go, messenger ol love that is deep as the sea md deathless as eternitv. tro, tell the heart that holds my own that pens Of fire could not write the scrolls ot nihility one-halt my love." Anil so he opened tho door. Clo jp.i tru went out into the gloaming with tho nir of a cat who was just going to say something like that anyhow when he suggestcdit. Mr. Tillinghast did not appear to notice this peculiar expression 011 Cleopatra's countenance. lie was looking nt the Bky. "l he stars arc shining, lie saui, "she looking for my message and she is thinking of me." And Miss lJiffenbaugh t She was sitting in her lonely bower, looking out into the star-lit nig!it,sayiiig, His messenger, with leet ot silence, is oven now on its way to tell me he loves me yet. I ieel his presence near me. in the meantime Cleopatra was car rying out his contract after the approved manner of a veteran Star routo contrao tor. Ho got along very well for a ciuar tor of amiie,aud was makingprettygood tune, when, while streaking down a loiiesomo alley, ho suddenly paused nnd aid : "I hope to die if I don't smell fish." And while hu was exploring the ash ile, hu was suddenly accosted by a onesome cat on tho woodshed. "Say, old indigo blue, shinny on vour own sido I" "Watchuci.iuus f growled Cleopatra, just glancing up long enough from tho old mackerel to tako the woodsiieddem measure. "I'll trouble you for that fish, if you please." "All right, said Uleopatra, 1 11 leave you tho bones when 1 m through wttn it." The strange cat reached out to take tho savory fish aud Cleopatra smote him, In less time than it takes to tell it he stood that cat in the corner of the fence and whipped enough hair off him to stuff a sofa cushion. And tho wailing cat dragged its lacerated body down the drain, Cleopatra resumed his fish, rc- 1 1. -l-Jl , -! 1.1 1. marking, as uu tiuugeu a pa3iug uiauit- uig brush, that he Loiieved, as long as ho was out, he'd sit up a little while and havo some fun with thu bovs. And ho had it. He went down the alleys and danced to everything he met. He nearly tore the ear oil a smart kitten that got up on a woodpilo and sassed him and asked him "where ho picked up that paper collar." Ho prowled through back yards, and almost horrified the lite out ot a most highly respectable elderly tortoise-shelled tabby, sitting in the kitchen window, by creeping up close under the windoA', and then roaring out to know if "she danced tho lancers. He scalped a harmless Mexican dog all the way down the bare back, in six red, raw lines, nnd shouted after the anguish stricken animal to "run "lotne and put on his hair !" Ho was hit once with an old kerosene torch that perfumed up like political procession, and hu crawled through an old drain back of the soap !:s, and canio out smelling worse than an Indian pio nic. At last hu heard music over in "Stony Lonesome," and went there and found tho boys were hav ing a littlu dance, and thu first thing ho did when he went he spat at the bar- eper and shipped a one-eyed cat from Hibernica. "Pile onto me by thousands!" hovelled. I'vu got jiiit one nit re eye than I want lo take home! And they didn't wait for a second 111 vitation. They piled onto him then and there, and tho babbling brook that prat tles through the rocks of Stony Lone some, when it heard the wild, unearthly clamor, turned back and ran up hill, and dumb terror watched tho circling clouds of misty hair drifting about in tho alluy below. In Judge Diffenbaugh's hospitable parlors his chosen friend lingercd.tliough the hour was late. At the piano Miss Dieffenbaucrh dreamily wandered through the entrancing numbers of "Schubert's Cradle Son''." There was a familiar voice at the gate that made her heart beat wildly. Tho voice caino across the lawn. It was Cleopatra. And this was what he was saying: "Iloop-pec! 1 can lick thu hrst bloody brindlo son of a rat-catcher that ever climbed a fenco ! Whoop ! I'm the old he Hashi Hazouk from Augular street, an' don't you ferfurgizit ! donyonfurgiy.it ! IJance to me, somebody ! 1 only weigh a pound I And then that apparition that mockery of a respectable, home bred catstrodo into ,)udgo iJillen baugh's parlor, aud everybody climbed on tho tables and chair. iHiss uineii- baugh fainted. Tho old Judge swore, Cleopatra laughed sardonically, and re marked that ho "had been out all oight, and ho was gettui to bo a big boy now. His hair was mainly gone, and what hu had left was not combed. His face was scratched. One eyo was closed His cars hung loose aud limp. lie I110 cuped in his speech, and tried to sing "Uld uaken liucket. Around his neck still clung the bluo ribbon and a letter, crumpled, torn, stained, unsavory. Tho Judge received tho letter with a pair of tongs, and Cleopatra was banish ed to the barn, which tlio shrieking rats deserted forever when thoy saw him ootuo in. Order was restored in the parlor, and tho Judge road the letter to himself Ho did not divulge its contents. Tho terrified guests thought, and still think.that it was a Mluiist warning, I hu Judgo did not show tho letter to Ins daughter. lie simply told her that if over that inflnito ass, young wlmt's-his name, came around that liouso again he would pnl verizo his brainless carcass with the lawn mower. Mr. Tillinghast still lives a blighted despairing life. Ho has gone out of thu mail service, and leaves all experiments 111 star routes to other parties. imruette. Pain and weakness of lungs, liver kidnoys and urinary orgam relieved bv using Urowns iron Ulttors. A publlo lecturer, in speaking of the "modern degeneracy of women," ex claimed! "Wo must now tako good care 01 our grandmothers, lor wo shal never get uny more." Cadet "Whittaker now appears as concert manager. Wo wero aware- that ho had nil ear. but wo did knou- llint It ' wns musical. Zacli Cliniitllrr on Hayes, "Zach" Chandler was a profane man, and in his own forceful phrase, "the Hayes crowd was pizen" to him. It is unnecessary to make uny further r.lltislon to tins ipiestionablo habit, evenpt to nay that when he is unfiled the leader may lard the conversation at his pleas ure. The listener to whom Air. Chand ler made proclamation of his hopes and intentions had brought a message to tho Senator from Mr. Hayes. The message was to the efFect that Air. Hayes desired closer communion with tho Stalwarts, lie had announced to a fiiend who hnd given tho message to him, who now de livered it to Mr. Chandler, that he saw no reason for any difference between the Stalwarts and himself! while lie recog nized the fact that the satnu forces in the Kepublican party which put them out put him in, he had never used the power of his administration ntrainst them. Sincu hu had been elected President, Lo gan and Carpenter and Chandler had all comu back into public life without any opposition from him or his adniinistra tieii. He hoped they could bo friends. Tlio messauc was delivered. Then the old man broke forth. He was almost whito witli rage, as he walked back and forth in the littlu room. When hu found his voice he shouted out; "Hayes is the most wonderful liar I ever saw." He lies all the time and on every subject." Then, loosening his necktie, and L'alh- eriug himself up for a disclosure that ho intended should go down to poster it v. he told tho story of how Hayes oneetried to use him, on the pretence that lie wanted to bo friends with thu Stalwarts. somewhat as follows: "Don't tell mu anything iuore that comes from tlmtliar. I know him as no oneeKe knows him: I know him through and through. Whv I made him President of the lnited States, and every man, woman and child in the L nitcd btates.except Ilaves.knows that. He is an ungrateful, cowardly liar!" and the old man's wrath almost choked him. He went on: "Why, when his administration began I went to him and told him that if hu would send Cluistiancy down to Peru, nothing in God's world could stop my joining flack to the Semite, and I wanted to be on at least equal terms with a Hepublican Pre sident as a Confederate Senator would be. 'Oh, my dear Air. Chandler.' said Hayes, 'is that what you want?! How ex cellent thing it is that you have comu to me in this friendly may I say broth erly? way. I love" the Stalwarts as I do my own people; and nothing would so fill my heait with gladness as to have in ;the Senate some such Stal wart as you are for a fiiend. Vou could do so much toward making the factions comu together into a more fraternal union.' 'Is that all you want!' said I; and tho old man roared bluflly after his wont "Well, I'll fix that right oil'." How can you fix it; said Mr. Haves. 'I'll fix it vou leave it to me.' " 'Hut how can you' said he. 'Givo i dinner party,' said I. 'Vou invite twenty and I'll invito twenty and we'll arrange it over a glass of wine. Oh, you needn t be afraid. Ill pay all thu bills. It won't cost you anything. Vou just invite your twenty, and I'll givo you a list of my twenty.' "Well, I went away and Haves never had that dinner party. I was elected Sen ator, aud Confederate Senators had a good deal more influence at thu White House than I ever did. Once only 1 heard from that dinner. One night I was sitting in my room and ISvarts came in. I didn't exactly know what business he could have with me and I waited to hear. We talked about the weather and passed thu timu of day, and the chat got nther dull.when Kva'rts cleared his throat once or twice and finally stam mered out: 'We' those fellows always saui we, as though they were afraid to stand alone 'We have come to the con elusion not to have that dinner as you suggested, but I'll give one at my house.' 'Well, I don't care low itV given, all I care for is to do it. Vou can give the dinner or I will, I don't care o long as it is given.' "Kvarts went away.aud I never heard of thu dinner again. Hayes thought he could keep us along and make us'stand by him by lying to us and pretending that he wanted to bu fiicnds to us." I he old man told other (dories on this interesting occasion. Among other things ho told how Hayes came to veto the Army bill. Chandler had taken Air. Chrintiaiicy's placu dining thu winter of 18(11, and was present at the extra ses sion, during which what was known as tho political legislation was under con sideration, flu was the loud-mouthed hanipion of thu retention of all extreme ineasures that had been put on the stat ute books during the war and during tho period of reconstruction. Hu was then, as always, thu incarnation of stal wart licptiblicuni.stn. And then, as al- :iys, Hayes was very weak, and very untrustworthy, it was generally believed up to the last moment that he would sign the bill restricting, a it did, the usu ot troops at thu polls. The Stalwarts were in a tronzv. I hey looked upon such a cour.-o as a biw surrender to the Democrats. They regarded it as giving ui) soinu ot the dear-bought fruits ol tin war. The rumors that Air. Hayes would sign the bill spread, until on the night of thu L'Oth of Apiil, Chandler made up his mind that he would compel the Presi dent to veto u. Mr. Haves was still keeping up the pretence that he desired the friendship ot Air. Chandler and the other Stalwarts, and so Mr. Chandler took advantage of his friendly status am novo around to tne Into lloiisoat midnight. I here ho made speech after speech to mo mild luaiiueied man tor wnose projected dinner party nu was to pay. They were Uko tho spceche that hu bellowed out in the Semite, ad milting that he believed in llio mvessi ily of blood-letting when the war began Ho proposed to sit up with llayo until n veto message had been signed. "I was going to stay by him," ho said, "and if he'd havo gone to bed I'd huogot into inu same bed. lite end was that 'lav signed thu veto message, and the Army 1 Ml i" 1 I i ii i ii iiuieii io ueeoiuen law. Hour after hour wis consumed bv the excited and angry Senator in laviiiL bare Hayes' duplicity us ho called it. Ho iieiiuiiueeii unit lor aiuioit every crime on the calendar.and among other thiinis ior his hypocrisy about spending money mi campaign purposes. "Of course ho spent money," he roared "but ho used mine. I didn't believe lu his cint about purity and nil that, for ho neggeu ino ior money himself, and gave him S:i7,0J0 to bo spent in his own State. What do you think of thai? Taking money from outside to In- usi-d in his own State, Did vou ever hear of meanness greater than that? Hut I mado him send for the money over his own signatuie, and I've got 'the letter now. I made, the drafts, too, payable to his order. He'd better not deny all this history, for I vo got the drop on him. He knows better than to mako an issuo with me on that subject. I'll let day light into the transaction of that cam paign if ho does. Ho got my money aim used it. i novor ret used money to anybody who could do the Republican party any good with it. and the cam paign eostmuagood deal of hard money. When I got through and figured up'l was out $,'17,000. And then, what do you think Soinu months afterward tho treasurer of the committee came to mo with bills for odds nnd ends. About S 1.000 was due s and I told him to go to Hayes. I had done enough for him, and he might pay his own bills in the fu ture. Well, thoy went lo Hayes." Hero thu old m in stopped and laughed till his faeo grew red and the tears streamed down his cheeks. Several times hu Blurted to go on, but tho laughter choked him. "Why," he continued, "what do yon suppose ho did then? Did he pay lW Vou don't know Hayes. Xo, sir; this civil service r,former,'this canting author of order No. I, directed that an order should be issued to the clerks of thu departments, to the effect that they must pay up their political assessments. He did, actually, and the order was printed; and wc had lo get in our work pretty fast to htop it. Iliad to pay that 84,000 with the rest." This is a sample of the way "Zach" Chandler talked about the man he made President of tho Tinted States. It is rude and rough and may not strike pleas antly upon thu cars ol the vountr ltetinb. iieans of Massachusetts; but I got my liilormaliou troiu one whom I havo al ways found trustworthy, and tends to bring to light the truth of history. Air. Chandler ditl not hesitate to talk amonrr the friends of Air. Haves in hist this way. Perhaps this may exnlain whv Air. Hayes refused to purchase a copy of "The Life of Zachariah Chandler." ... . . i j if miry L. Aehoii, in the Jhston Post. Science In Everything. now A mh nii si'ii:.vnsr cvcKiMUk-vTi'ii Willi I.IVHKY llli AMI Sl ltl'IllSLIi A I'.Mit nr i.ovmis. Science is a big thing, but there may sometimes bu too much of it. Thn Rtrflrotul Advertiser relates a casein point. A certain scientist learned that a young man had engaged a buggy at the livery stable and bribed the liveryman to allow him to experiment on the 'buggy. The following was the result; 'i'he young scientist put a small elec tric lamp on the lower part of the dash board, out of sight of the driver, and ran small copper wires to the back of the seat. It is well known to the student of nature that when a brunette young man and ablondu girl, who act as tho positive and thu negative that is, ho is posi live that he will put his arm around her, and she negatives tho arrangement along uUirst until, after dark, there is a cer tain electric current established, small in itself, but of great power it carefully husbanded. Vou have all felt it. It is like your arm getting asleep or hitting your funny bone on the arm of a rocking chair. Well, this wire was placed so that the arms of the young peojilo would touch it. Just as they wero passing Fitzgerald's, there b the toll gate, they began to snug up, and before they got to Linderniaii's the little lamp began to throw out light. It went under the horse's feet and lit up tho road for several rods, aud the young people were alinsst a much astonished as the horse was. They thought I here was somebody fol lowing them with a lantern, and they straightened up ami the light went out. ivery little while they would get to gether and kiss eaeli other slyly, and im mediately the light would blaze up. The girl was really frightened, and insisted on tho young man sitting on his side of the buggy, and ho was a littlu frightened the first few times the light flared up ; but as he came out to hug, he was going to hug if it turned night Into dav : so he went to lying to her about the horse be- ing a phosphorus horse. He said thero were somu horses so full of phosphorus that when tlivv got wanned un a little from diiving they shed light all around. 1 hen they got nearer and tne electricity igain appeared, and for an hour they ode along in thu evening by the bright ,'ht. Tho young scientist passed thuin number of times in another bu?ffand hu is so well pleased with tho'exneri- itient that he will apply for a natent. f he young lady was very much annoyed it the tpieer light, and while she cannot :iy she did not eniov the ride, she has requested her escort to be careful next time when they go out riding and not get a phosphorus horse. Tho young man when he got back lo the stable, told the It . , ,. , . liveryman mat tuai was tne lightest rig he ever drove, and he wanted a calcium light tho next time hu took his girl out. I her will know what caused the light when they read this. It is getting so uieru is electricity in everything, Water. i mer is so common that few nersDiis think of it as the most important factor in the building up and civilization of tho woild. lut water was also Gods builder ot the world, as we see it. Thu rocks were mud and sand made bv water and laid down by it. onukiudun top of another, f'.tnl i.l...,t. 1 1... - i , miiMi ui ii,iiii5, ,n uuviTL'ii up uy water, so umt tne rotten plants wero kept there and changed to coal. Veins of lead. copper, gold, silver, crystals, were cracks :.. t l... nn.. i ...!. . .... . in un- iuciv, HiitMi wmi water mat tiait these precious things dissolved in it. And water, as ice (glaciers), ground up rocks into earin, in winch plants can groiv. tiiin mill ctt'iioiiio li . .1 ,! ... i .-v .1., i I i. Wntni-hiiil.u ,.in.c r.i .,..!. ,k, .' ..." I1:' ,lulv 3 is water. When you pav twenty cents for a peek of potatoes'vn'u are reall v pay. ing lilleen of the cenls for the water that is in the potatoes. A boy who weighs i .i ... .' i. r ,J .. ..." v --- ..i.ri.iv i.Mi,,,, if ..O..C....1.. .i..:.. i ?... v l.au 1 '"IIMMni II I'll It LIV til It'll 111). would weigh only twenty i.nm.dV Ami i it,,,-., ,. m i... ;.. n.JJ.. . !.i.... water. It i.iu.t dissolve thing's to maku them into new things; and carries them where they aro wauled to build thn new tilings, It softens the food, and then ns a watery blood carries tho food to overv iiait of tho body to mako now flesh and bones, that wo may grow and havo strength. It carries the food up into the plant. Water carries lnau and goods in boats, and, as steam, drivos his cars, makes the wheels go in the factories, ... i,iu iitt-iuiit-a, d wo could not And it makes io world. it i.i .i sniii' mi'imt, -11111 wo could not get u'ong without it. much of the beauty in the world. BaantmnaanavaavaaaiMaannk. wau. Odd Items. What is the dillercnco between chari ty and n tailoi? The first covcra a inul titude of sins; the second a multitude ol sinners. IIOIISK.S, UATri.K AND CIIICKI'.NS. For colio and grubs, for lung fever, cough or hide-bound, I give Simmons Liver 1'egulntor (liquid) in onu ounce doses; or ono tcaspoonful of the powder iu a mash twice a day. Vou can ro commend it to any having stock as tho best medicine known or the abovo coin plaints. In using it with my chickens for cholera and grapes, I mix it with the dough and feed it to them onco a day. lty this treatment I havo lost nono where the Regulator was given prompt ly and regularly. K. T. Taylor, Agent for Grangers of Georgia. The Flathead Indians arc praised be cause they saw wood for their wives. isut they did not get their names tor any such reason. Old umbrella and buggy tops are now being utilized by ladies for theatre hats. The demand tor lliem almost equals that for Confederate bonds. Tako AVer's Pills for all the purposes of a purgative, for constipation, indi gestion, headache and liver complaint. 15y universal accord they aro the best of all purgatives for family use. A new style of dress goods is called "Alan in tho Aloon." Some other man ufacturer is sure to eclipse it with a new sunshade. flic great scarcity of cabbages this year. leads a contemporary to tietcci a slight flavor ot tobacco in Connecticut cigars. iivils io in: Avoinr.n. Over-eating is in one sense as product ive of evil as intemperance in tVinking. Avoid both, and keep the blood purified with IJttrdock Blood Bitters, and you will be rewarded with robust health and aniuvigorated.systcm. Price 1.00, trial size 10 cents. "The health of Washington!" ex claimed old Airs. Pinaphor, reading tho big headline in the newspaper. "Why I thought Washington was dead." is hot WATint. Orpha AI. Hodge, Battle Creek Mich., writes: I upset a teakettle ol boiling hot water on my hand. I at once applied Thomas' Eclectrio Oil, and the effect was to immediately allay tho pain. 1 was cured in three days. A lady in reply to some guests who praised the mutton on the table said: "Uh, ves, my husband always uuvs the best: he is a great ipecac." The Boston "Transcript" has discov ered a man who never laughs when he tells a joke. But adds that nobody else laughs either. NK.Mtl.Y A .MIUACI.K. E. Asenith Hall, Bingharaton, X. V., writes: "I suffered for several months with a dull pain through left lung and shoulders. I lost my spirits, appetite and color, nnd could witli difficulty keep up all day. My mother procured some Burdock Blood Bitters; I took them as c irectcd and have felt no pain since first week after tiling them, and am now quite well. Price 11.00, trial size 10 cents. The four candidates for Representa tives at the recent election in Salisbury wero all sons-in-law of one man. Ho found out what four scoundrels hit daughters had married. Air. William R. Seymour, of Colum bus, O., writes: "I attended a course of lectures several winters ago at the Ohio Aledical College of Cincinnati, O. There I was taught 'Iron is a prominent ele ment in tho physical organism of man kind; without it life is an impossibility, a vast percentage ot the diseases and premature deaths to which the race is subject, is caused, or at least mado pos sible by a weakening ot the body in con sequence of a lack of iron in tho" -blood.' Having suffered from ill-health, poor digestion and miliary troubles ever since 1 recovered from typhoid lever, compli cated with malarial lever, 1 determined to give iron a trial. From investigation I learned that Brown's Iron Bitters were the best, and that they did not blacken the teeth, so I concluded to make usu of them. They have acted like a charm. I never felt so robust, hearty and strong." Spurgeon says that when vou meet a mad dog you should never argue with him, unless yon are sure of your logic. It is better to get outol his way; and it anybody calls you a coward, vou need not call him a fool everybody knows that. What do you think of XV "Can didly, I don't like him ho has hidden vices. A-ah! What are theyt How do I know, when thev are hidden vices?" A Air. Hargrave calls tho attention of the London Times to the following case of the resurrection of a tree. A fow years back a great elm was blown down, with a great ball ot earth at Us roots, on the property of Air. Smyth, the rector of Little Houghton. Alen wero set to work to remove it, but when they had tawn off tho great limbs, to their astonishment and almost terror, the trunk rose up of its own accord, and went back to its original place, nnd there it stands to this day. It is throwing out a fresh head, and is pointed out as a curious case I r ..... oi resurrection A. B. Robinson, of Gineganset Cor- ners, Uhonango county, ., is the owner of a mammoth cooler, in which ho has now stored about oOOO barrels of eggs. Theso eggs aro purchased during tho summer at very low prices aud pack- ,7 Mod away, and at this season thev aro ' snipped to Nuw York city, where tlioy aro sold for good nriees ns "fi-esh.lni;i Mr. Robison estimates his profits thii: r , I, J"",,w f?r 1 'i 9 TV1 20,OWU- ",ohT "l801,0'1 "n? "H-1;,?, lW, C'1r,r0a,,, 1 .,luck,?., (a,,oul f)' fr," Ohio. Theso urn kent until Alrtv ti-ltm inr i i uDiBni a iviil ni vvi i i i I . ,-x . . ' - - v im-? loads uiho. i nose aro kept until .May. when 1.1 ' B? " .wmim ot hrst-class restau- rants in isow ork. It is understood !lM a.s.l0CK V'01"")' to tormed at Norwich, who will trausuut, thu same business on a larger scale. IIIIANIIV, WISH AND IllTlT.KS. Speer's P. J. Hrandy, Port Grape Wiuo and Wino Bitters havo an extern sivo and reliable demand, Physicians recommend them In preference to any other goods of the kind. Speer's vine yards at Passaic, New Jersey, are twelve miles from New York, and his nine was nines uoill aCW l OIK, nlHI HIS MII1C Was awarded the highest pi eiiiium at the t'en tennial. For sale by t A Ivleiin, drug 1 gist, Bloomsburg, Pa. from