Newspaper Page Text
00tOMBIAl)RM001UT,STAIlOI'TUIt NOIItU ANIlOOLOJN
Issuod wcokl. , every l'rlday morning, nt
lll.()l).M8lll'ltll, UOLUMI1IA (JOINT.; 1'A.
At two iioi.i.uu per ii'.ir, lu nlilo In advance, or
d irlnif Hie enr. Atlcr tho expiration or the jenr,
t.m will Ira charged. l'o hiiiihi iiih m out. ot tlio
c.mniy in" lernis ruf pur venr siricuy in niiinnci'
l.5 It not pilil In advance and f3.no If pajnvnt
llu uuiilj I'll ll -.Vllll'l Mir J rill
No p 1 iiT dUeiinlinU' d, eveept nt the option nf I ho
Piili'dslier, until nil niiv.iraH-rs nro paid, hutlonz
cmtlnn.' l cmltts utter thi expiration or tlio llrst
year win mil. iiu Kiven.
All papers scni out id thoS'nc, or tn distant post
oillces, must bo puld for In advance, unless u respon.
Bliilo person In Columbia county assumes to pay tlio
sutwHptlon duo on deinand.
posTAOli la no longer u.xactcd trotn subscribers In
Tlio .tobbliw Department ot llio Cni.fMiilAN Is very
cuaiple'e, nnd our .Inh I'iIiiIIiik will compare favor-
.l.lu itfl 1, tl,-.t of it,., I.,-.... r.lll..u lltiiniL' ,t,ilr.M
demand, lieu lv nnd m moderate.' prices,
Columbia County Official Directory
President Judge William r.lwpll.
Associate .) inlifrH -Irani Hcrr, Isaac W, Monroo
I'rotliiinotnrv, Ac. H. I'rnnk y.nrr.
llesister .V. Itecorder VV llll.iinson II. .tucoby.
District Attorney -John M. uluik,
?li"rirr Mleliael n rover,
survoior -Isaac Devvllt,
Treasurer Jolm Snider.
D'linmissloners William Lnwton, .folin Herner,
l.'iiiiitnlssloners' Clerk William Kllekliautn.
Au litors-l'. .r.fiimptieli, s, i:. smith, liaMd Yost
Coroner (.'harles (i, Murphv,
Jury Commissioners laeob II, 1'iltz, William II
Cnllntp HuniTlliteu.lent Wl'tlam It. Hnvder.
llloom l'oor Dlstllct -lilreclors-o. 1'. I'.nt, Scott
Win. Kramer. liloninshurit ami Thomas Crevellng
ocoa. u. r. i.lll, sceieiary.
.Bloomsburg Official Directory.
Wnomsburg Ilanliliis Company John . Funslon
rresldcli'. II. Il.llro . Cashier.
1'lrs Nn loii.il Hank Charles II. l'axton, r resident
i. I', rustlii, cashier.
Columbia County Mnninl Savin? fund nnd Lorni
Association li. II. utile, rrcsiuiiit, u, .. inner,
Illoomsburtr Ilulldln! nndSavlnir l'und Association
-win. reneueK. rresiueii!,.i. it. iconison, s-ei-reinr.
liluoiiHlnirh' .Miiiual Saving rund Assocla'lon J
,i. nroHor, rresiuen , c. u. narKioy, pecreinry.
I. I'.TiHtln, (supply.)
Sunday s 'nlei'S-l'i'ii n in. nnd CM p.m.
I'r.iver .Meetliif-livcry Wednesday evening nt ti
Ill ,lv. Nf uinl-l n. in.
Mjais free. Tho public aro invited In attend,
ST. MATTIIXVr'd I.UT1IKIIAN CltCHCII.
Minis er llev. J. Mccron.
Sniulay Mervlees io a, m. nnd p. in.
Hnuil.i v Krliiiiil- it. tn.
l'r.u er .Mco'iiur-Lvcry Wednesday ov enlne; at O'f
heats free. No pews renled. AU are welcome
Jilnls'cr-ltev. stu.irt llli-lioll.
Sunday Sen lees lu a. m. and P-
Slltul.iv Hehoiil .t n. in.
Praver Meoi ing i;very Wednesday evening at sx
Sea' s free. Xo pows rented. Si rangers welcome.
MKTHODIST Kl'ISCOeAI. C1II KC1I.
Presiding i:tder-llur. N. S. luickiniiliam
Minister ltev. J. II. .Mcd.irrah.
Sunday Sen Ices Via and ay, p. m.
Siiml.tv Mi'linnl '! 11. 111.
lilblo Class-i:verv Monday evening nt njtf o'clock,
young Men's l'raver Mentlng livery Tuesday
evening m cif o clock.
(lcner.il I'rayer Jlectlng-Kvcry Thursday evening
, o UIOCK,
IIEI OKMEU CIIL'KCII.
Comer of Third and Iron btrccts.
Pastor Itcv. T. K. llutriueler.
Kosldenee Kast street, opp. Third street.
Sunday Services u)4 a. in. and 7 p. 111.
Sunday School 3 p. in.
I'rayer .Meeting Saturday, 7 p. m.
All urn Iniltpri Them Is iiIu'hih rnntn.
services every Sunday afternoon ul 1 o'clock nt
jciier s enurcii. .viaoison lovvnsuip.
ltector ltev. John Hewitt.
Sunday Serv Ices luj a. m., 6 p. m.
Sunday School o n. m.
Klrst snnrtav In ttio month, llnlv Communion.
Services preparatory to Communion on Friday
evening ucioro mo hi sunuay in earn moniii.
I'evvs rented : but oven bodv welcome.
Persons desiring to cuusult tho Hector on religious
milters will Hud htm at tho parsonage on Itoek
Presiding Klder ltev. A. I,. Iteeser.
Jllnl'ler-Ucv. J. A. Irvine.
.Sunday Service :i p. in., In the Iron street L'huich.
Praver Meeting livery Sabbath at 1 p. in.
All are Invited. All aro welcome.
" JtLOOMSHUltO DIKIXTOUY.
QCIIOOI, OllDICltS, lilanl.-, just prinlul nnd
O neany uounu in small hooks, on nanu
tor sale at the Coll'jiuian Ofllce.
Vb. in, ls75-tt
"IJI.ANK DICICDS, on I'arilir.K-nt and I.incn
Yj Paper, common and for Admlnls rators, I'.xeeu
turs anil trustees, for sale cheap at tho Coii'mhian
MAnitlACSE CICUTH'K'ATi:S.i.it printed
nnil for sale at the Coi.I'viiuan Olllie. .Mlnls
f the (losiel and Justices should supply them
belves with theso necessary aitleles.
TUSTICRSnnd Omslaliles' KeIlills" for"slile
J at tho Columbian onice. They contain the cor
rected fees as ostablMied by tho last Act ot the Leg
islature upon tlio subject. Kvery Justice and Con
stable should have one.
pOXnUK NOTKS jut prinled and for sale
uicap ai. mo ioi.i'miu in oiuee.
AVID I.OVi:.I!i:iI(!, Merchant Tailor
Main St., ubovo Central Hotel.
HOOTS AND SHOES.
HKN'KY KI.KIM, Manafaetiirer mid dealer
lu boots and shoes, groceiles, etc., Main St.,
M. KNOItl!. Dealer ill Hunts and Shoes.
latest and best si vies, corner Mala and Muiket
Btrous, In tho old post onice.
CLOCKS, WATCH r.i, SC.
CE. SAVAGE, Dealer ill Clinks, Watches
and Jewelry, Main St., Just below the Central
MII.l.INHUY ,t FANCY HOODS.
C. IIOWElt, Huts nnd Caps, Hoots and
Shoes, -Main stieet, above Court Douse.
MI I, Licit .0 SON', dealers in Dry
Hoods, groceries, uuicnswnre, lluur, salt,
shoes, notions, etc., Main street.
Iii It. IKELEH, Attnriiey at Law. Itoonis in
11 Exchange lilock, id Hour, Illoomsburg, Pa. os
Bit. WM. M. KEIIElt, Surgeon and I'liysi
clan, onice S. E. corner Hock nnd. Muiket
T II. EVANS, SI, I)., Surgeon and I'liysi.
l . clan, noitli sldo of Main street, above J. K.
II. SIcKELVY, SI. 1)., Surgeon and l'hy
. blclan, north sldo Main klrect, below Market.
H. ItOniSON, Attorney-at-Law.
lu Ilartman's building, Main slieet.
MUEI. .IAC01IY, Marhle and llrown
Stone woi l;s, E.ust llloomsuurg, liervv ick roau.
, Clark & Wolfs store, Main btreet.
K. II. C. HOWICK, Surgeon DontLt, Slain
kt., above Hi Court House.
Til, S1AIZE, Slamuiotli Grocery, I'meGm-
cerlcs, Fruits, Nuts, Provisions, ic, .Main and
T 8. KUIIN, dealer in Sled, Tallow, etc.,
JL. Ceutrn street, letvveeu Second and Tldid.
CSI. Imitl.STMAN, Saddle, Trunk and
, Harness maker, Kldvo's lilock, Slain street.
rpiIOMAS WEHII, Confeelioiiery and II ikcr".
wholesale and utall, Exchange lilock,
YV. COKELL, Furniture Eoonis, lliree
i story brick, Main btreet, west ot Market St.
EW. HOIIllINS, Llquo
( from the iiorlhwist 1
W. ROIUSINS, Liquor dealer, second door
WM. II. AllIiO'lT, Attorney-at-I.nvv, Slain
F. DALLMAN, .Meriliiint Tailor, .Second
i btreet, nubbins' building.
Tpvit. e. w. Kurricu,
PHYSICIAN 4 SUItOEC'N,
onice, on Main btreet,
Mar,M,74 y Catawissa, Pa,
WSI. L. EYEKLY,
Collections promptly made and remitted, onice
orpu.llu catuw Usu Dejioslt llank m-3s
YULO IT IRON Ar0RlS,
DANVILLE, MONTOUH COUNTY, PA.
W I U.I AM 11. LAW, Slamiractunr ol
. T Wrought Iron llrldges, Hollers, (Ja-sholder,
nreproot llulldlngs, Wrought Irou liooilng, llooillng
Iruaies, Flooring und Doois, 1'uriu dates and Feuc
"if, al Wrought Iron Piping, Stacks mid all kinds
M Uttiitu Work, Ao. llepulra prouipUy ultcudeU to,
N, U.-Drawlngs and EsUmates buppllcd,
Qct.t) 1375 tl
Hl'Y blliAM l-LOlUliKfTTll
f-TOUT & DltEISCH, 1'ItOPItICTOIiS.
lllrnl ..Un In Vlruip llbtli. tH t(. 0 U
0, 1'. ELWELL' Editors ani Proprietors.
All. , HKItltlKO, Carpenter ami Imlldcr,
. Main street below Pine.
MO. A W. II. SHOKMAKKR, Denfers in
. Dry (loods,(lroccrles nnd (lencrnl Merchan
dise. llUSIXKfcS CAIIDS. "
IK. A". I TUKNKH,-
Itusiilcnco on Marliet Ptrect otio door below
1). ). Waller's.
onice over Klelm's Drug store, omcc hours from
1 In i4 p. m. for treatment of diseases of the Kyc, i:nr
All calls night or day promptly attended to.
J)"-J. 0. lll'TTKlt,
onice, North Market street,
Mar.27,'74-y Illoomsburtr, Pa.
JK. II. F. GAIIDNKH,
1'JIYSIOIAN AND SUUGKON,
onice nbov o J. Sclnij ler A Son's Hardware Store.
Q (!. HAKKI.HY,
nnico Main street, llrower's llullding, Second ftcry,
Itooms4nnd n. Oct, 15,'7S.
A T T O I". N E Y-A T-L A W,
Ofllce. Hartmall's lllnfl.-. enniprMnln n,i,l Mnrl-f.fr
Greets. ort.'s. '75
onico lu llrower's building, second floor, room No.
Illoomsburg, l'n. ulyl,J3-y
Q It. A V. .1. HUCKAI.EW,
A T l Oll.N Ul S-AT-1.A W ,
Ofllce on Main Street, first door below Court I louse.
F. .t .1. M. CLAKK,
ATTOItN i: YS- AT-LAW,
onice In Knts llullding,
A. CHCTEUN-n SMITH.
I1EHVEV EW1K0 SMITH.
CKEVELING SMITH A SON,
A 1 lOliiNlil S-A 1 -I,A VV ,
SEf.Ml business entrusted to our earn will reelevn
prompt attention. juij 1,'73 y
II. l.ITTI.K. llOU'T. K. I.1TTI.E.
P H. A II. K. LITTLE,
tiy"lllisness before tile tt. K. I'lltent Onlep fill nnileil
to. Olllce In thu Columbian llullding. 1v 33
JHOCKAV.VY & E LWELL,
A T TO It N E Y S-A T-L A W,
Coi.iMniAN Hen niMi, Illoomsburg, Pa.
Members of the United States I.nw Association.
Colli (Hons made In nnv part of America.
.vgeius ior i iiiiiiiieiiiiu i.ne insurance company or
uirh. A.seis neiiriv ji.i'uu.i'ini. i ne eesi in i ue
eouniry. .-enu ior iiescripuve pampnict. tf
Will rraetlce In all the courts ot Columbia. Sulll-
van nnd I.v coming counties, In the Supremo court of
Peniisvlviinla. nnd lu the circuit and IMsti lot courts
oruiei mi eel si.ues neui at v llllamsport, Pa.
n in ne iii ins inure iii nn, uiiiiuoiiiu iniuoing.
room No. 1, llloonisburg. on Tuesda.v s. Wednesdai s
and 'I hur-Mlavsor eaeh week; and In Denton on Mon
das, rrld.ivsand Saturdajs, unless absent on pro
fessional business. Sept. lS.lsTft,
jMIEA.S HltOWN'S INSUIIAXCE AGEN
CY, Kxrhango Hotel, Illoomsburg,
, . rn,t n,o o
. 13 roii.iiiui
, . lo.tino, nn
, . ll,t(Hl,IIIIO
., 1,1110 0011
.. S,C 0,(100
:tna. Ins Co.. or Hartford. Connecticut.
I lierpoo, London and Clone
oval or Liverpool
'Ire Assoelatlfin. I'iilladelnhla
American of I'iilladelnhla
Alias of llarirord
Wvoinlng. or Wilkes llano
Fanners Mutual ot Danville
Home, New York
March 5C74 y
M. B 11 0 W N,
HOOTS AND SHOES Towaniia Hoots a siiorl.ilty.
Ilepalringdonentbhort notice. Under brown's Ilc
lel, Illoomsburg. Oct. s,'75-ly
A F 1 11 S T-0 LASS
JOHN LAYCOCK, I rop'r.
Q SI. DIUNKEIt, GUN and LOCKSMITH.
Sewing Machines nnd Machinery cr all kinds re
paired. Oi-KiiA noi'SK llullding, Illoomsburg, Pa.
Oct l,'7o ly
Pv. M. TUBES,
WIIOIFSAI.K Ill'llFIt IN
liUKNINO AND LUIiltlCATING OILS.
onice In Mal7o's Building, corner Main and Centre
tf-Oiders bdllilttil nnd promptly tilled.
II. C. IIOWEII, DENTIST,
Itespectfully offers Ids professional services to the
ladles and ireiillemeii of I'dooiie-burg and vlclnllv.
lie Is prepared to ntlend to all thu various operations
In the lli.fi of his profession, nnd Is provided w It li tho
latest luipioved I oia i.l.Als 'Hull, which villi be In
seited on gold plating, sliver nud lubber bnse to
look ns well us the naiuriii lecin. leeiu exirucieu
by all Hie new and most approved methods, und all
operations on the teeth cuietully undpropeilj at
oillce a few doors above tho Court House, same
side. Oct. b 76
T.T J. THOltNTON
I'i. would announce to llio clllrrnsnf Blnoms
biiigand vicinity Unit be has Just received u full and
complete ussui lliieul ot
WALL I'APEII, WINDOW SHADES,
nxu'iiKs, roiins, tassew,
and all other goods In Ids lino of business All tho
nevvestand most approved patieinsof tho day aro
alvvaj s to bo round lu his establishment, Main street,
below .Market. fit. b.'iS
OpiiUNito the Court House,
Tho LAiuirsT und HitTlnalliespiclslnthccounty
IW. 11. KOONS.
Oct, 8,'75-ly Proprietor.
BUG WN'S JJOTElT
B. STOHNER, Fropuetor.
Accommodalionb llrbt Cabs-fl.vtiloll.to jcrday,
Largo, ASry Sarnplo Hcoms on 1st Floor,
A Kuot' UiUe rtur of 1IoU'''
Hloomshurg. Oct. g 1S75 If.
Ty;ilTOHH TO THE (.OLUM1S1A.N.
-rvrsoiislndihtcdtutlio undersigned forMibseilp.
fci'Uon. , liiEFFENHACII
i A N U F A OL1 0 R Y
C. SLOAN & lmOTHKU
TTAVE on liand nnd for sale at tlio most
JLX reasonable rates a splendid stock of
and every description of Wagons both PLAIN and
Warranted to be made of the best nnd most durable
mnecrlals, nnd by tho most experienced workmen.
All work sent out. from the establishment will bo
round to be or the highest class anil sure 10 giv e per
fect satisfaction. They hnve nlsoatlncnssortniciitof
of all the newest and most fashionable stvlcswcll
nnd carefully made nnd ot tho best material.
An Inspection of their work Is asked as It Is tic
llev ed Hint none superior can bo found In the coun
try. Oct. 8, lS75-tf.
KEYSTONE CARRIAGE WORKS'
AH. CI10S.SLEY has on hand and for sale
. cheaper than tho cheapest, for cash, or w ill
exchange for old Wagons on reasonable terms.
or every description both plain and rancy.
Portable Top Haggles, open lluggles, Plain nnd
Fancy Platform spring Wagons all of tho latest style
and made of good material and fully warrant id.
(live me a call before purchasing elsewhere, as I can
not bo undersold. I claim that I make tho best wag
ons for the least money.
I also do painting, trimming and repair old work
nt tho shortest notice, old springs welded and war
ranted to stand or no pay. I will exchange a porta
ble Ion bnrrtrv for nnv Mliilnf lumber. S'ich as lieir
lock, pine, ush, linn hickory and poplar to bcdellv ei
ed at my shop by the llrst or February, 1S73. Iron
dale orders taken and McKelvy, Neal A: co's for re-
A. S. CKOSSLEY.
oct. 8, 1S5.
The Great Cause of Human Misery.
Just publiihtd in a staled airclopc. J'riceGclt.
A l.wri'nn r.nthn nalure.trcntment
i nnd nodical cure of seminal weakness,
' spermntorrhii'ii. lmiiiecu uy siii-auuse
Involuntary emissions, lmnotencj, ner.
vous debility and impediments to marriage gener
a'ly, consumption, epilepsy and Ills; mental and
physical Incapacltv , by HOHKItT J. CVLvElt-
WEI.L, M. 1)., author of the (ireen Hook ic.
Hie world-renowned author In this admlrablo Lee
turc, clearly proves Iroin his own experience that
the nvv nil consequences or seir abuse may bo elTeet
ually removed without medicine, and without dan
gerous surgical operations, bougies, Instruments,
rings, or cordials, pointing out a mode or euro at
once certain nndeiTectual, by which every surfercr,
no matter what his condition may be, may cure him
self cheaply, privately and radically.
7'n'3 I.ectucc will prove a boon to thousands
Sent under seal, In a plain envelope, to any ad
dress, on receipt of six cents or two postage stamps.
Address tho Publishers,
CHAS. J. C. KLINE & CO.,
127 Bowery, New York, Post onico Box 4,sS0.
April !g, '7."i y
a. ii v it luxe
T) ESI'ECTFULLY announces lo the public
JLV that ho lias reopened
(old stand) Illoomsburg, Pa., at the
Forks ot the Espy and Light Street
roads, where nil ilescilptlons or
leather will bo made in thu most
substantial nnd woikmnnllke manner, and sold at
prices to suit the times. The hlghust pilco In cash
w 111 at all times be paid tor
G It E E N
II I I) ES
i f every description In tlio country
runage Is i especttully solicited.
The public rat-
iiioomsnurg. wci. i. isip-
HA11MAN & li ASSERT.
East Street, below Rail Road,
We respr eifullv call puLll" nlteiiilon to tho follow,
tug Tacts that : ''I Ley manufaiiuiu llrst class
.MINE CAll WHEELS ANI) AXLES
and all kinds of Coal Breaker Cast logs. They also
make all kinds of Car, Machine, Bridge nnd other
castings u'cd by contractors generally, '1 hey also
HEATING ANI) COOK STOVES,
and are prepared tn furnish all kinds or repairs, such
ns Urates, lids, riro Brick, htrctihcrs, Ac. They
keep constantly on hand
PLOWS AND PLOW POINTS.
Large Iron Kettles, Fanners' Hells, Sled Soles, Wag
on Buses, cellar urates, 4c. 'lhey aiu also prepaid!
Saw and Grict Mill Machinery,
shafting, Pullev's, Ac. 'I Ley puy t cclal attention to
Repairing Threshing: Machines
'I he Proprietors aio belli praitlcal meihanlcs. Try
E 1.0 IN WATCHES, CLOCKS,
Silvei ware, Watclicf? ami Jewelry,
Ladles and Hi utli menV Oold ai.d Sllur Watches,
ot A mi I leu ii "I'd Fcrilgmnimufatturi'.
Silver and Plated Ware, Clocks,
FINE JEWELRY, AO., AO.
ItEl'AlRLN'G AND ENGRAVING
M persons Hull bled Hi the und. itlgnr d on Hook
Account piioi tiiJuno lit V VU" IS 1
und tiltli by nolo rui htrwlso Utoiu Jul uurj Ut,
1 "it, as aiu r H ut ull unsel tied uecouuts ill Lo plac.
ed lu Ibo hands of un o.ilur Mftfflffifa M, ,
.... . .. i7i.7.'vi Hp. Win. VlKclVV. WO
nruim'Snd toatund pioinpily to all ffi'f"
calls in iledltlue, huigio.jind outlines, lub.lp.
putronaiio U icscllufly so Ited.
(tf in I if iitii lit if M
Wj p i n hi pin i
BLOOMSBTTRG, PA., FRIDAY, DECEMBER 24.
What will it matter by-and-by,
Whether my path below was brlgr.t,
Whether It w on rul through dark or light,
Under n gray or golden sky,
When 1 look back on II, by-and-by?
What w 111 It matter, by-and-by,
Whether, unhelpod, I tolled nlono,
Dashing my foot u gainst n stone,
Missing the charge of the angel nigh,
lllddlng mo think or the by-and-byj
What will it matter by-and-by,
Whether Willi dancing Joy I went
Down through tho j cars with a gay content,
Never believing, nay, not I,
Tears would bo sw eeter by-and-by 7
What w ill it matter by-nnd by,
Whether with cheek to cheek I've lain
Close by tho pallid angel, Pain,
Soothing mjseir, through sob nnd sigh,
"All will bo elsewlse, by.nnd-by 1"
What w ill It matter Nought, it I
only nm sure the way I've trod,
tiloomy or gladdened, lends to Ood,
questioning not or the how, the why,
ir 1 but reach him, by-and-by?
What will I care ror tho unshared sigh,
If, In my fear or lapse or fall,
close I have clung lu Christ through nil,
.Mindless how rough tho road might lie,
Sure lie will smootlien It by-and-by.
What will It matter by-and-by?
Nothing but this : That Joy or Pain
Lifted mo sl;j ward-helped mo to gain,
Whether through rack, or smilo or sigh,
Ileaveu-Ilomo-All In All-by-nnd-by !
Story of nn Dleplmnt.
life. Various regiments whilst serviiiL'in tlin
east have hail such an animal, which often
rendered good service to tho corns to which
.iu ,iiiBiii, uo iiuaciieii. i ne king s ranircM
.u one iiino were in po-scssion of a fine mill
nhiril,nl,D at tr P .. .
... v....,..ua a hi, Mineii ior many vcars was
never oneo abent from parade. As soon n
tlio bugle soiindeil, ho would walk majesti
cally lo the place of mtiMer, nnd take up his
position at the right of tlio column. If tho
maliout or driver presented himself, the ele
phant would lift him on to his shoulders In-
means of his trunk, and evidently without
ine siigmesi eiiort to himself ; but, if left to
his own unaided intelligence, ho obeyed tho
ordinary words of command without ever
making a mistake, such as: "Eight face,"
"March," "Mark time." "Halt." II,. in.
sistcil at all times on Kivinir licit to tho men
whenever they were engaged in loading or
iiiiiuuuing naggagc, and was evidently
pleased to be allowed lo make himself gen-
oiauy useiiii. wiien i,o wagons were im
peded on the inarch, as it not unfreiiuently
happened, Jock was duly sensible of his
men im,,n.ln..n A... , .
fii..iiei-, ior ny i:is enormous
strength ho would push a heavy load up u
steep peclevity, which six or eight oxen
failed to do without his assistance.
It happened that tho rangers we're sudden
ly ordered to embark for China and there
was no accommodation for taking Jock on
shipboard. To the great disappointment
of the men, the authorities decided that he
should be left in India. He was, however,
permitted to accompany the regiment as far
as tho quay.to watch tho troops as they went
on board.inany of whom had a parting word
of kindnes for their old comrade. "Good,
hy, old man" "poor old Jock" were ic
peateit, with many variations, both by
ollicersand men. SIcanwhilo tho animal
watched the proceedings with great appar
ent interest, as wondering when his turn
would come to go on board. Hut when tho
vessel steamed off and left him ashore, ho
became frantic with rage and disappoint
ment. It had been proposed that he should
he transferred to another corps, but he most
persistently refused to have anything to do
with it. Neither tho coaxing nor the threats
of his mahout were of any avail. Though
he had previously manifested the gentlest
disposition, ho now threateningly withstood
all kindly advances on the part of his would
be comrades, and at length so savago did ho
become that it was deemed expedient to
place him in confinement. Even the ma
hout himself was several times placed in
a very awkward predicament, and on ono
occasion barely escaped with his lifo. No
means could be found to assiiago tho grief or
to calm tho anger of this faithful creature,
who so constantly mourned tho loss of his
friends. 1 In t in le.-s than two years the
Hangers came hack to their old nuarters, and
were informed of tho melancholy change
which had como over their old comrade.
"No go nccr no touch, sahib : he strike
hard," said tho mahout j "ho kill."
"Why, Jock, my boy," said a young o ni
cer, formerly ono of his special friends,
"why, what's tho matter?"
The animal pricked up his ears and in
stantly recognized tho voice, which was
proved by his manifesting unmistnkahlo
signs and sounds of joy. It was quite af
fecting to see, when oneo moro ho was per
mitted freely to repair to the parade ground,
with what kindly recognition ho embraced
ninny of his companions, placing his trunk
tenderly on their neck and shoulder. I
need hardly soy he was at oneo leitistatcd in
his old legimeiital post, tlio duties of which
ho recommenced to discharge as if no inter
ruption had taken place. Chamber's Jour
nal, I'loweis for the Dciul.
When life is over, its battles fought, its
hopes, and feais nud sorrows ended, and no
moro need nor opportunity remains for
huirnn cheer and friendliness to kindle tho
glazed eyo or thrill tho heart that has censed
to beat, then tho elegant casket N provided,
and tho sweetest and costliest llovvers mo
heaped around. Their language is eloquent
of tciidernrs-s and sympathy, speaking moro
than lips or tears can utter of garnered af
fections, mid Miirrndcreu tits and broken
hopes. Ah tho fiuiciitl hour arrives, liovv
many friends appear; every room is crowded
by nu unwonted presence, Moro flowers aro
brought their pcifunie loads tho air with a
heavy ivvciliuts, and ivlien nt lust tho nar
row Ikhiso receives Its occupant, loving
hands still cast in tho flowers, tho Inst sacri
fice tho heart can offer,
It is well. Who shall fuibld tho llovvers?
Who shall ditecralo tho best sentiments of
huir.anily hy crying, "Why all this waste?"
Ami ytt could those eyelids move, could
llioFo ryes lu hold tio friendly croud, that
maihlo I'ueo feel the (hopping lenr,woiild not
(hat oft discouraged hcurt havo great sur
prise iu knowing that soiimiiy really cherish
such rigurd? Ami if tlio flowers could
speak, would they not ntk s "Why did not,
you fruiter us before-hand along tho alhs
of tho living? Why not have suffered us to
' ' ir.ll nr .. ir ...t : 1.11. .1.. ...1.1
v. v jum mii-viiuil I.IIIIU mo em uuum
listen j to delight tho admiring eyo when it
could appreciate 1 Why not oftcner, beforo
this, havo filled tho housowith tho fragranco
of your kindly sympathies? You camo to
tho funeral nud vour coming was no pro.
tenco. You really cherished that departed
friend in your heart of hearts. Hut how
little ho knew of it 1 In tho hurry of your
secret lovo you have passed him by on the
other side, anil havo gone on, forgetful of
the sorrows, and trials, and discouragement
and weariness which your presence and your
sympathy might have alleviated. Why
should we waste our fragranco on tho dead ?
Should not our beauty and our sympathy bo
shed rather upon tho living, vvhese hearts
aro sad nnd sore, and whoso weak hands are
weary with the carca and toils of llle?"
Such might be tho questions of the flow
crs, if speech were granted to them. And
a higher und more authoritative voice has
said: ".'.svve have opportunity, let us do
good unto all nien.espccially unto them who
aro ofthe household of faith.,'Oiiroiiporttinity
is now. Death closes each avenue of useful
ness, and shuts each door crevice that stood
open beforo us, If wo havo lovo and
sympathy let us show them hoic Let our
flowers be scattered along the paths of tho
living, rather than on tho coffins of the
dead. Let them bo used lo bless hearts that
arc lorn and broken, rather than wasted over
those who ate gone beyond the need of our
sympathy and tho reach of our approval.
Let our care and lovo be for those whoso
tears are past, and whose sorrows shall re
turn no more. The living claim our love.
A Hog Story.
Tuldbu Mr. Richard Grant White, in the
Galaxy for December.
Digs cannot laugh except with their tails ;
and then they laugh for joy. I doubt the ex
istence of a doggish sense of humor. Hut
scorn and contempt they undoubtedly do
feel thev show it to other dogs and I believe
that they must feel it for some men. At least
I should not like to run tho risk of losing tlio
respect of a dog of any character. I should
certainly see it in the contemptuous whisk
of his tail and in the sidelong glance of his
eyo. The most supremo expression of con
tempt that I ever saw was from a dog of
mine. Uo was a nohlo beast, large and
beautiful. His sire was an English blood
hound, his dam a St. Hcrnard mastiff'. Ho
was fawn-colored, brindled, and his cars
were softer than the finest silk, lie was so
big that he could stand on all-fours and take
a roll with his mouth from tho dining table,
and that ho could spring up, put his paws
on my shoulders anil look me in the laco
And yet I had a little hlack-and-tan terrier
that would bully dear old Thor for so I
named him out of everything; everything,
that is, but hones, meatless bones ; for that
is a subject upon which no dog of any deli
cato sense of what is duo to himself will al
low the least outside interference. Hut Thor
loved l'uck and would let the little rascal do
almost what ho liked, and when his teasing
mil impudence reached a point that was in
tolerable, tho grand old fellow, instead of
taking his tormentor hy the back of tho neck
and quietly dropping him somevvhero out of
the way, would meekly come and put up his
great paw on my kneo to beg me lo go out
and set matters straight. And yet for l'uck
ho would fight any thing; and many was tho
row into which ho got by standing up for
his quarrelsomo little playfellow.
One day I took Thor with mo on a now
walk, in the course of which wo passed the
gate of a fanner who had two largo pointer
dogs, who were very cross and quarrelsome
both with man and beast ; even so much so
that thev attacked men who came to the gate.
As we approached tho gale, there they lay
together outside of it upon tho cloo green-
svvarth that stretched into tho road. At the
sight of Thor they pricked up their ears,rose
to their feet and began to growl. Thor, trot
ting on ahead of lie, turned his head a mo
ment, but kept on his trot. As wo drew near
they crouched together upon their bellies,
and began to movo thus toward tho middle
of tho road ; and when wo were opposite the
gate, with one yel ing bark they made a si
multaneous rush upon the stranger. Oh,
I'hor, Thor, did the spirit of Shakspearo en
ter into thee, that without even turning thy
head again, thou hcavedst up thy leg, liko
Crab's dog, and served those (logs as he
served tho gentlewoman's farthingale, and
then joggedst on as if nothing had happened,
leaving them to sneak back to their lair, with
their tails between their legs, less iu fear
than iu astonishment, and thy master to
eleavo tho sky with laughter? Verily, I
think there must ho some human curs, who
liko to spring yelping upon a man merely
beeaiiso ho is a stranger, whom it would bo
well if somo big huniau mastiff' would treat
somewhat after the same fashion. They de
servo no more respectful consideration.
A l'lcn for Late Suppers.
I discussed llio question recently with an
ublo physician, who said to me : There is
nothing moro absurd than to pretend that it
is unhealthy to sleep Immediately after tho
last day's meal. Is not man nn animal? Do
not anim.ils, without exception, sleep nftcr
cnting? Do wo uo! feel liko sleeping after
ench day's meal, nnd is it not hy nn effort
that wo shako off' sleep ? Evidently the body
yearns for sleep. Kxercho immediately alter
every meal is pernicious, Hcst is healthful.
What rest can compare with sleep, which
reposes tho mind, tho lungs, even tho henrt?
Sco tho peasants, No persons enjoy belter
health than they do. Supper is tho best
meal of tho day. No sooner havo they sup
ped than they go to bed. Look tit the actors.
There was Hublnl, lo dined nt three, went
tn his dressing room in tho Italian opera
house and slept till tho theatre opened Its
doors, At midnight ho supped heartily nnd
straight to bed he went, llo died of sheer
old ngo. You know Mous, Thiers' habit?
Tho incinent dinner cuds ho stretches him
self out to sleep and sleeps au hour. The
truth is, If you look around you, there will
ho found Unit the great majority of men go
tn hid immediately ufter making their best
ineul, uud you ccilainly never saw anywhere
in tho wnild lioultliler, Htrongcr women than
thoso of tho gient murkcts. What is their
nilo ol'life? Dinner and tn bed. Take an
other, the very opposite class astronomers
They keep lute iiiuiibj their hcst Will is
taken vhen the star my good night, 'fheii
they sleep. Did you ever hear of an astroic
tuner dying under a hundred? Tlio major
ity of servants and ineehuiilcsgo to sleep im
mediately nftcr Inking their best meal j they
nrc right) they obey nature's voice, which
iihvnys gives judicious counsel, Xpiridion,
Chancellor Kent's Predicament.
A IIAC'KWOODSMX CAUOIIT HIM IN AN
L. Ih Proctor, author of "Tho llcnch and
Ear," contributes to the Huualo Courier an
amusing incident in tho history of thocreat
Early in June, 1815, Chancellor Kent and
his wlfo.ln a private carriage.left their homo
iu tho city of New York on a tour tn tlio
"Country of Genesee," as western New
ork was then called. At that time, though
tho distance did not exceed thrco hundred
,, , ... .. ,, ...
" ' "
i, j iiiiiii am 1 orK 10 urcgon now is, jn
tho fifth day out tho couple Inst their war.
and night coming on, believed themselves
doomed to spend it iu tho open forest cx
posed to all its honors and dangers, Hut
jnst as Kent brought his horses to a halt, a
light suddenly gleamed out ofthe Interstices
between the trees, a short distance ahead.
Hushing onward once more, they found
themselves in a few moments in front of a
comfortable log house standing near tho
A woman apparently thirty years of ago.
with a lighted caudle iu her hand, comes to
".My good woman, myself and mv wife.the
lauy in the carnage with me, are traveling
on our way to Canaiidaigua, hut wo havo
lost the way; night is upon us and wo can
go no further. Canyon give us shelter for
the night, somo supper, nnd something for
our lior.-cs" asked Kent.
.m,. . p ,, ..
i u arc poor ioiks, sanl tho woman.
aim i in mono. -ly man is chopping wood
over in tho Hillings settlement, 'three miles
oil, and ho won't ho homo iu nn hour. You
arc strangers and I don't
but " lk
like rosnectahln nenntn n,l t , '
. " .... .'. '. V"
I n ll'l nil In Dftnrt,l -...1 Ull f II
.,.. ".j, iyi,ii li
o ; s IT Yon w' Z , , , "
get out and come In, while I put the horses
in the stable."
-Mrs. Kent obeyed. Tho hor-es were un
harnessed, led to tho fctable and fed. In
short time tho 'woman 'prepared a homely
out acrep.aiilo supper lor her guests. When
the meal was finished sho said :
i s pose you ro tired and want to iro In
oeu. J hat's our bed in tho corner, bi.t you
can sleep iu it to-night. I ami' mv man ran
sleep overhead. I'll juit set his supper on
un- mine; wucu ne comes in, he'll eat it
but he won't disturb you. Then hc'll.come
up to bed where I am.'''
S, saying, sho'placed her man's cveninc
repast on the table, lit auother candle, then
ascended a ladder leading to a sort of scuttle
Hole, through which she crawled. In a few
moments she was lost in sleep.
i no travelers also retired to rest. Tired
uaiure hurried them sw ft v on in n,
land of dreams. Suddenly tho Chancellor
started up exclaimim
Hessic, that outside door is not fastened.
rcsently the man of tho house will return.
and seeing me in bed with you. ho will of
course think you are his wife, and Hessic, lie
won't relish that. Hcing a wood-chopper.
l....MIl 1. ... "
no win nave his ax witli him, and before I
.... e.i ii.uii manors mo unaneel lor n t i s
State will stand ii pretty good chancotobe
chopped to pieces-not a pleasant thing to
think of, Hessic."
a Dad matter. Iiilohe is chonninrr
ou up ne may include me in tho exercise
Vv hat can you do?" said .Mrs. Kent.
lc" you. licssie, whatTll do. I'll mish
iii.il uioie against me Uoor. When the man
comes it will take him somn time in rpmnei, I
...... . w .
it. H hilc he is doing so I can explain mat-
.v-.o i.. nun, sum inewianceiior.
Accordingly he arose, took hohl of the ta-
uieiopusli it against tho door. While in
the act no Heard heavy footsteps approach- i
nig , uiu next instant a man ol gigantic
sua-, in uis snirt sicevcs, wearing n bare.-sk ju
cap on his head, pushed tho door open ami
entered the room. The first object that greet-
eil his sight was the Chancellor, with no
ciotning on nut ins shirt. Glancing at; the
ncii no saw, as lie supposed," his wifo there,
and the situation became painfully apparent'
to him. Furious with jealousy he excl'laim-
id . I
llll'l...!.- 1- ,, . . .1
vvuuiiiuuevii are you, in my house nt
thistiinool-night? Dam youl I've chliirht
you. whoever you nre."
"It's nil right, my good
trying to explain matters.
sir," said Kent,
"It's all right, 1
"All right! All rightl You bo darned,"
thundered tho man. "I see didn't expect
me home. Thought you'd fasten mo out
when I did como was going to hnve things
all your own way here, hey? but I caught
you happened around at tho nick of
"l'ray let me explain, sir," said.tho Chan
cellor. ".Myself and my wifo there "
"Your wifil Yourwilil Good heavens I
what a hold cuss you are, I know who you
arc now. You're Sam Flickner,that Used to
court my wife, as I heard tell. Now, Flick-
near, what havo vou got to say for your
"My name is not Flickncr. It is James
Kent. I am Chancellor of tho State of New
York. That is my wife Hessic, that is iu tho
bed there. Your wifo is upstairs all light.
There is your supper for you on the table,
Eat It, for gracious sake," cried Kent iu a
"Chancellor nf tho Slato of New York,
hey? What in the deuce Is tlio Chancellor
ol the State of New York doing in my house
nt this timo of night? Darn pretty'
way to get out of a scrape lay It to
tho Chancellor of tho State, hey? If lie
should catch you in the houso liko I have
caught you, ho'd chancel you, I say you
are Sam Flickncr and I'll kick blazes out of
you,-' said tho man advancing toward Kent
with a lit that looked likon sledgo hammer!
At this critical moment his wifo stuck her
bend tlnvvu tho hatchway, exclaiming:
"Hold 011 ,liml I'm up here all right. They
have lost their way ; I guess they arc tfood
folks, nud I've given 'cm our led 1 eat your
Buppcr and como up hero to bed; don't n like
suili a linr of jonrself, If I hadn't hceu
sound tisliep when you ramo all this fuss
woiild'nt havo happened," This address
brought 11. utters to a proper undcrijiiiiling,
The ii'iin apologised for hU hastiness.
The Chancellor went to bed. Tho man
sat down and ate h supper, nnd when it
was (iiihhid, retired quietly to his bed up
stairs, und soon all thu inmates of the house
were wrapped iu slumber. Tho next morn,
ing tho Ik stets prepared her guests a coin,
fortablo breakfast, Her man Ivpcntcd )iU
upolpgiea (if the lust night, gave careful di
rections regarding' their loud, nnd with
many good wishes bndo them adieu.
tnv here : I'll ,.ivV Vn ;..:'' lurem uc,nP examined, a number o
IX, NO. 51
, XI., NO. 45
A lliincliback's llcvcngc,
Mi'iuiLTttvo two op Tin; hoys who had
MADK TUN OK HIS IH'.l'OHMITV.
In August lnt great alarm was caused in
tho village of Incisa, near Florence, by tho
mysterious disappearance of two children
a hoy, nine years old, on tho morning of the
21st, and another boy, of eight, the following
evening. It was supposed that they might
have fallen into tho stream, where they wont
to fish and bathe, but no traces of them or
their clothe.s'colild bo found. All kinds of
exaggerated ideas got afloat in the village,
,..w,t . niii.iii.111 m mesu uru inn mo nrsi
more particularly as these were not tho first
't was .vserted that there were children kill
crs in tho adjoining wood. On the 29th,
while ono of tlio women of the village was
arranging her hair nt tho hack window of her
room, she heard frightful shrieks, and recog.
nlzcd them as coining from Amergo Turchi,
a hoy nino years old, and that thev proceed.
cd from the workshop of ono Carlo Grandi,
a cart carpenter. She ran down into tho
street mid alarmed the neighbors, who made
Ior tho workshop, which they found closed,
the hoy crying loudly from within for help.
Viler vain attempts to get Grandi to admit
them, they hurst open tho door, and found
him struggling to force the hov into a hole.
He' had cut tlincldld" fearfully about :the
head, and from his mouth blood was flowing.
caused, as the boy afterwards narrated, bya
vvedgo Grandi had tried to force into his
mouth to gag him.
After the man was secured it was observed
that some of tho bricks of the flouring were
loose, and on these being removed flic first
thing seen was a child's hand. Tho placo
was quickly dug up, anil the mutilated bod
ies of tho two boys who had disappeared ten
""-'"re wcro discovered ; ami on the Mole
.1 l..e. i. . . ....
"l"",llca ura'"" WB to lorcc Amer
izo Turc it he iiff
..... , ,,.!, ,. 1.,..,.,
w v,.ikl UUIIV3 11BIU lUUIIU ill IIIU UO,.
tnm- ' known than
the village became a scene of the wildest ex
citement, and the authorities had to tend off
in hot haste for whatever Military and police
was in the village, and a sufficient force ar
rived ju-t in time to save the wretch from
being lorn to pieces by the populace.
Jt seems that tho murderer, Grandi. was a
deformed man, of diminutive stature, high,
rounded shoulders, very largo head, upon
which there was not a scrap of hair, nnd re
pulsive features. As is too often tho case in
Italy such unfortunate creatures become the
object of open public ridicule. The boys of
Incisa had been in the habit of teasing and
tormenting Grandi and playing all kinds of
practical jokes on him, nnd it was in revenge
for this that now- ono and then another of
tho ring lenders had been enticed into his
workshop, there ho had murdered them, bu
ryin? them under the floor. Americo Tur
chi snid that Grnndi hnd invited him into
hU ""''"l' ,mder tllQ Ire't of having
some fun with the other boys ; that to accom
plish this ho was to hide in tho hole Grandi
uncovered, but that immediately when he
entered it Grandi attempted to strangle him.
Jiame Correspondence of the London Times.
Changes in Words.
' ipso nv Is m, n.,m.,n f . i .
bo constantly going on. Those who have
lived through a generation or two must havo
I10tc,l how mnnv hnvn l.enn Inlwwln,!
have changed their n-rnnnil in (heir iim
Allusions to their introductions and chan-es
meet us constantly in our reading Tims
Hanter. Mob. Hullv. Ilnl,l,!n Rl,m ei,c
nine nnd Palming, were new words in the
Tnilrv' ilnr n.,il., lir 1,.... .1.
- Jt ., 4 uau uouu lliv
utmost for some years past to stop tho pro-
grcss ol JUobb nnd Hanter. but have been
nlainlv homo down hv numbers m,l t,tr.,v,i
by those who promised to assist me." Jit-
eonnoitre, and other French terms of war.arn
ridiculed as innovations in the Sntrtnlnr
Mute was a new word in Swift's day. " Tu
state, if you know what that means," he
writes to Stella. "There is a new word
coined within a few months," says Fulier
"called fanatics." Locke was accused of
affectation in usintr ideh instead of notion.
"Wo havo been obliged," says the World,
"to adopt the word police from tho French."
vv here wn reml in nnnllier miml.n, r nc
Ui.tn.l til,n l.ir.l, r .1, ...:..!,;
- s W...V. .,.,...uv, . .1.
,vn. - ,l ,7;,..,; ..i.im, ,i-.,...i c .1..
most beautiful mouth iu the world, and
which has since received tho sanction of our
most accurate Laureate. in ono of his come
dies." lanore was once sacred to errand
juries, "In the Merest of" has been quoted
in our time as a slang phrase just coming in
to meaning. Jlore has wormed itself into
Use within the memory of man. WrinUe is
quietly going into ue in its secondary slang
sense. Mull' wo have read from tho lien of
a gravo lady, writing on a gravo subject, to
express her serious scorn. Most of theso
words aro received as necessities in the
language. Some, like "humbug," nrc still
struggling into respectability. In the middle
nf the last century, it was denounced as
"the uncouth dialect of tho Huns, tho jabber
of tho Hottentots." Another writer puts it
into tho mouth of a parly of giggling girls,
who pronounce some one whom lie suspects
to be himself iui odious, horrible, detestable
shucking Humbug. "This last new coined
expression," ho observes, "sounds absurd
and disagreeable whenever it is pronounced;
hut from tho mouth of a lady it is shocking,
iletestablej hoirihlo and odious." Yet so
pointedly does it lilt a blot in humanity, so
necessary has it become to the viluperativo
clement iu our nature, that neither mankind
nor womankind can do. without it. The
fastidious JWiulucy iseliiiiucutin its praiso
"Yet neither is it any safe ground of abso-
Into ex. communication from thu sanctities of
literatiiic, that a phruso is entirely the
gjeiw lb of the street. The woid humbug, for
instance, rests upon a rich and cnniprchcn.
slve basis ; it I'aiiiint ho rendered adequately
cither by Gcnnnn or Greek, tho two richest
of human languages) and without this ex
prctslvo word we should nil he disarmed for
one great case, continually recuirent, of
social enormity, A vast mass of villainy
that cannot othcivvito bo reached by lecal
lemiltles, or brgught within tho rhetoric of
scorn, would go at large with ub.-oluto iiupu
nlty were It not through the llhadainuii.
tlican aid of UiU virtuous and inexorable
The) fashion of langiiugo toward scenery
V'pccially Alpino scenery lias entirely
changed, Oneo it was surveyed with tho
eye simply of the travelcr.to whom it might
well teem 'rugged,' horrid,' 'inhospitable,'
uovv, when difficulties- of transit nro over.
come, or hailed for tlio difficulties' sale, do
fccription expatiates in the whole cumut of
rapture iroin ternicr and lovely to sublime,
TJIU COLUMMAN, VOL
COI.UMIIIA IH'.MOOIIAT, vol,
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Cards In tho "Huslness Dlreciory" column, 01.0
Iu every point wciiimmoront the emotional;
at reaching tlio heart of things. Our author
esses find great and strange wonderful medi
ums for awakening these emotions. In our
ordinary conversation wo admit words now
which wcro oneo thought nhovo the tone of
common talk, and wo may at any day hear
in a party collected for purposes of mere re
laxation, words which DeQulnccy would
forbid for such occasions as inappropriate,
and so far indecorous. 'Equally with bosom,'
ho says, "are prescribed the words ajjliction,
guilt, penitence, remorse, from tho ordinary
current of conversation among nlcro ac
quaintances, beeaiiso they touch chords too
impassioned and profound for harmonizing
with the key in which tho mere social civil
tics of life nrc exchanged." Strength is tho
general aim wo do not fay eflect in tlio
talk of tho present day. Our slang and
epithets all show this. Tho youth of every
period has had, no doubt, a list of epithets
as short as unmcaning,for passing judgments
on persons and things, hut not necessarily
inspired by tho same intention. It strikes
us that now whatever iiiclinatieu there exists
toward variety lies on the side of vitupera
tion. Loathing is moro eloquent than lik
ing. It was not nlvvays so. "Heavenly,"
"pretty," "fine," "sweet," wcro oilco
as lavishly misapplied as the terrors of
our present custom. Formerly, when
a speaker wanted to convey his meaning hy
merehruto strength, a familiar objurgation
too readily presented itsclfdeaving fancy somo
range when ho set himself to seek secular
terms of dispargement. Happily swearing is
out of fashion(as far as wo arc here concerned);
but it is impossible not to feel how certain
words a certain word come into general
use, which once would havo been inadmissi
ble, supplies a need, fills an irksomo void
left by its profano predecessor. "Beastly,"
which wo hessitate to write, is not wrongjbut
it is rude, and imparts to the speaker somo
ofthe blind satisfaction of an oath without
the sin. lllachcood's Magazine.
A Connubial Controversy.
The bolt on the back door had needed re
placing for a long time, hut it was the other
uight that Mr. Throcton had the presence of
mind to buy a new ono and take It home.
After supper he hunted up his tools.removed
the old bolt and measured the location for
the new one. Ho must bore somo new holes
and Mrs. Throcton heard him roaming
around tho kitchen and woodsbed,slamming
doors, pulling out drawers and kicking tho
furniture around. She went to tho head of
tho stairs aud called down :
"Hichard do you want anything?"
"Yes, I do I" he yelled back. "I want to
know where that Texas cork-screw is."
"Yes, cork-screw, Hichard 1 Fvelookcd
the house over and can't find it 1"
"Why, we never had one, Hichard I"
"Didn't ch! We've had a dozen of 'em
in tho last two years, aud I bought one not
four weeks ago. It's always the way when I
"Hut you must ho out of your head, bus"
hand," she said, as she descended the stairs.
"We've kept house seven years, and I never
remember of seeing you bring a cork-screw
"0, yes, I'm out of my head, I am I" ho
grumbled, as he pulled out tho sewing ma
chiiio drawer and turned over its contents,
"Perhaps I'd better go to the lunatic asylum
"Well, Hichard, I know that I have never
seen a cork-screw in this house."
Then you are as blind as an owl in day
light, for 1'vo bought five or six 1 Tho
house is always tip-side-dovvn, anyhow,
and I never can find anything 1"
I ho house is kept as well as any ono of
your lulks can keep one!" she retorted.
growing 10 1 iu the face.
"I'd liko my mother hero to show vou a
few things," ho said, as ho stretched his
neck to look on tho high shelf in the pan-
"remaps she'd boil her spectacles with
the potatoes again 1" answered the wife.
"Do you know who you aro talkinrrto!"
ho yelled, ns he jumped down.
"Ye-, I do!"
"Well, you'll be going for York state, if
you don't look out !''
"I'd liko to se myself. Yv'hen this houso
"Look out Nancy I"
"I am afraid of no man that lives, Hich
"I'll lenvc you !"
"And I'll laugh to sec you go !"
Going close up to her he extended his
finger, shook it to emphasize his words, and
slowlv said :
"Nancy Throcton, I'll apply for a divorce
to-morrow. I'll tell the judge that I kindly
and lovingly asked you wliero the gimlet
was, and you said wo d never had 0110 iu tho
house, which is a bold falsehood, as lean
"Gimlet:" she gasped.
"Why, I knttw where there nro three or
four. You said cork-screw."
Did I ?" he gasped, sitting down on the
corner of tho table; "well, now, I believe 1
"And you went and abused mo like a
slave because I wouldn't sav a gimlet was a
coik-scrcw," sho sobbed, falling on the
"Nancy," he said, tenderly lifting her
"Oh, Hichard !" sho chokingly answered.
"Nancy, I II go right out of doors and
kill ni self!"
"No, you needn't I love you Mill! only-
you know a gimlet is not a cork-screw "
"It ain't Nancy; forgimnio nnd less bo
And that household U so quietly happy
that a canary bird wou'il sing its head oil' If
hungup in the hall.
JrnT as Wkli .The other day a ragged,
led eyed man stopped a gemleniau on tho
street, and asked
"Say, mister, lend a feller a. dollar, will
"Vo sir!" was the emphatic reply,
"Why vvun't you ?"
"Uocmiso I don't know you," replied the
"Well you wouldn't let mo have it if you
did, so vou might us well hand her out," was
tho cool reply,
li t: Wasn't Oni:.-Oii the Lake Shoro
road the other day 1111 old iailv, seated op
posite luhurp Linking gentleman, kept her
eyes 011 him 11 long time and finally aked-
"Mlstcr are ou a pickpocket?"
''Why no, mndaiii, I'm a business man
of New York," ho answered.
"isthutso? Well 1'muw fully disnnnolnt-
wanted to try an I see If 1 couldn't ic
I form you."
m aouewoMtr, nin4