runt AND H PlinLlSltED EVERY FRIDAY MORNING TI!BUOLOUHIA DUttDINO KCAKTIIlt coum iioubc, ntoousnono, rA., jiv CHARLES B. BROCKWAY, EDlTon Aim riiomiETon. ?orm:"Xwo Dollars a Year payaMo la ndvaneo. JOB PRINTING Ofalldcscrlptlons executed with ncnlncss and dlspalch nt roosonablo rates. flnliimbia Oountv Official Dircotory. IfcahUnt Jittloe-WlM.iAff l'''W,;H"n H Mo. .,......... r,..r..-.li,At llHItlt. ISAAC . Jii-ntMcr t AVro)i'fr-WlI.i. AMo ''1 Atony. Mitrlcl Atlorncy-lMtai lliusoN, .ill. yl utlttort I). J. I'AMPllKM., DANIt.b I.hE fllAllLIHCONNr.lt CoroiiH--CIIAlit.r.sq.MOIirilY. JnivcomiHlM(o!icii-lHAAoM(;lininn,JoHMMa Cotiiifj Si'i'crffifcmtenl-CliAltl.M U. BAnKLBY lllotm 7vtr TMsMrr-Dlrcctors, H. II. MtM.xn William KiiAJirii, Illoomsbnrc, nnd joiinsoii ki;mi:, uhciiwcou, uiiahi.es v-unriniiiniu. Bloomsburg Official Directory, lllixmilvro HanUna fb.-J01IN A. FlINSTOtl 1'iesliirnt, II, II. Oiiotz, Cashier. lint A'affonnl Jlmik-llUAH. H. PAXTON.Prcs't , J. P. Tustin. Cashier. . . Columbia CbvnW MulualBavinq iViitlnitil TfanAH Jorfnloii-E. II. Little, Prcs1!., 0. W. JIillkii. Cn&,.t.,. rrtt,itn nml ton-inn 701(1 AtoOCW Hon wit. Pi:.coc'K, ITci't., .1, If. RonisoN, (See, Jlloonuliura Mutual Uni-tnu bima Assoctaiwn J. J. linowcit rrcsldeut, V. O.UAnm.r.v, Bcc'y Ohuroh Directory. lT.ESllYTEniAK ciiuncn. .Viifsfrr-RcV. Hlunrt Mitchell. fiabbath .Sm Icm-IOK A. Jl.; 7J J T, M. Sabbath fehml-9 A. Jl. 1'raiicr J17rrfi( Wcilnpsilny.V'J 1 M. Heats freo; no pews rented ktrangera wel coine. Blooniobnig Directory. 1)AI'i:il RAGS Just received nnd for snlo at tho CoI.UJintAN OIUcc. "CLOTHING, Ac. DAVID I.OWKNIinnb, MerchautTnlIor,.Maln M.,nhovo American llouso. WJI. JIOIIUIH, Jlcrclmut Tailor, over ltoscn slocks conlectIoucry,oiiiio3lloL'admanslur. nlturo wnreroomi, DltUOS, CHEMICALS. &C. if V. I.UTX, DniKSlst and Apothecary. Jlnlni.t, I'j, hclow tho 1'ostOlllco. OLOCKa, WATCHES, AC. (1 I;. SAVAHi;, dealer in uiociih, wnirnes aim Jewelry, Main St., Jubt below tho American' House. LOUIH llEItNHAltD, Watch nnd Clock maker near isoutbeast coiner Mnlnnud Iron cts. RCATHCAl'.T, Wnlch and Clock Jlnker.Mar , ktt bllcel, below Main. UOOTS AND SHOES. 1,1 JI. KNOItn, Dealer in Doots nnd Shoes, latebt I'j. nud best styles, corner Main nnd Market (jticcts, In tho old Tost Ofllce. HHNUY 1CI.KIM, Mnnurncturcr and dealer In Hoots nnd Hhom, Uroccrlcs, etc, .Main btrcct, lias I Uloombburs, PROFESSIONAL. DIt. II. C. HOWUIl, Humcon Dentist, JInlnBt., nbovo the Court Houbo, DIt. WJI, SI. 11E11KH, Humeon nuil tliyolclan. Ulllcu over the Flist Nntionnl llnulc. SO. HAItKI.EY, Atlorney-nt-La-.v. offlce, 2d , lloorlu Kxcliuuuollluck, near the "Exchange ntcl." Jl). McKELVV, M. D., Burgeon nnd Physician . uorthbldo Main fat., below Market. JC. ItUTTEIt, Jl. D. Hnrceou and l'bytlclau Jlarketsticet, above Jlalu. I II. ItOHISON, Altorney-nt-Law. OUlco Hart tJ . linui's building, Jlnln btiect, DIt. U, V. KINNEY, Burgeon Dentist. Teeth e.ttincled wltliontp.ilu: Main St., nearly op naliu Kjiibcopat Church, T It. EVANH, M. 1)., Burge on n: .1 Phyblclan, iJ boiilli bldo Jlrtinbticct. below Mi.rket, DR. A. L. TUKNEH, I'hyslelnn and HnrRron, cf llro over IClilm'n DriiB More, lesldiuco one door belo Ilcv. D. J, Waller. MILLINERY & FANCY GOODS. 1.1 l'KTEUMAN, Millinery and Kaucy (JuudH, li, opposite Eplbcopul Church, Jlnln st, MI.SH I.lZZir. IlAltKI.UY, Milliner, Itambey building Mn!n btiect. MISH M. DEItltlCKSON, Millinery nud Fancy (londi,JIaiUbt., below Market. MllH. JUUA A. A HADE 11AUICI.EY, Ladle''' Clonics nud DrcHH l'attern, boutheabt enrner Mnin nnd West his. iplli: MISSES 1IAKMAN Jllilliierv nud r'nucy lUoodb. Main St., below American Iioubc, HOTELS AND SALOONS. I.'UUKH IIOTirL, by T. Dent. Taylor, enst end x oi .MU1U bll lect. JMEHOHANTS AND GROCERS. ft C. MAltlt, Dry OoodH nnd Kollous, sonth- yj wehii I corner Jlalu nud IroiiKlK. I70X .t WEllll, 'cmlectlonery nnd ISakery, ' wholesnlo and letall, Exchauco Ulock. He. IIOWI.lt, Hats and Cnps, Hoots audShct3, . Jlalu bt., nbovo Couit House. T 11. JIA1.E, JInmmoth Grocery, lino Oro t) . rirltt, l'lulls, Nuts, Provision, 4c, Jlalu r.mi L'tntre fetrects. M'KEIA'Y, NKAL & CO., drains lu Dry (Inods, (frnrcili s, Klonr, Feed, Halt, i'ish.Iron, Nails, etc.,.'','. E, cor. Jlalu and Jlarkctfats. a II. MII.LKU & ION, dcaleru In Dry Ooodn, I). Orocerleu, (iuccuswnre, I'lour, bait, Bhoes, Notions, ctc.Mainbt. JIISCEL1-ANEOUS. ft M. lilltlKTJIAN, Baihlle, Trunk a Haruen U. n aktr, Bhlve'i, lilocit Jlalu Htrcet. 0V. H01111INU,lIiUoi dealersccoudiloor (rora ' b.ilt'lYr'Ci-t coruir MlilU I ul lrmihlR. P J. TIIOItNTON, Wall r)n-r, Window bhades l j. nud llxlureu, Hupei t bUvi , Warn si. Gl V fOKELI,, Furulturo l'.onms, thieobtoiy I' bilek, JIulu Htiett, west ot Market r.t. UI'OnENSTOCK.riiotoiiraiihcr, ovi r ltobMnii li Eyer's Btoro, Alain nt. I'i. Kt'lIN, deplerln Meat, Tallow, itc.,Chcm. berliu'sulicy.ienr of American lloubo. OAMl'lir, JArorjy.IInrblo nnd Iirown Blouo Works, East Dloombburg.IJerwlck road. WJI. ItABB, dealer In furniture, tmuks, cede! " v lllow waio.nenr tho Korks llotcl. V II.DIDLEJIAN, Agent for Muusoii'b Copper EiTubularLl!htulr.8Uod. n FOUTEIt. Glue Mnkcr, uud Whlto tuid l'uucy U. luuuer.Bcottowu. M Ul 13 110QJ B, nnd blank NOTIM, with or with. 1 out citmptlon.for kalo nt thu Coi.UMniAN Olllco. lBlcaM Ontawissa. U w- .l,.AI'I,!AN,,Morchnnt Tailor, Secoud U. Uobblns' llulldliig. Bt, ))KiaggrU physician fin.',:lu,RT. K,UN?,:' dryi:oodN.'irTCo7ka,nud M...v..v. ...v.b...iM.ni7, nirUH, T ,'! ItltJ'f I"H, "OittnwlbFa Hoube," North I.CotmrMalui.udtlerouilBtrects, I iiMia.it, lllllaid Saloon, Oysters, and Ico v-i um m bi'Ubuu jiiaill r. M n'SOllST. dealer In General .Merchandise JH, Dry Goods, Groceries Ac, QimilUEHANNA or Uriels llotil, a. irmtcn". ip bander I'lopilctor.toulh-cabteoinerlluluuud Hecoud Ktbcet. JI. II. ADllO'lT, Attorney nt law, M:ilufat7 Light Street. 1 nt r.Vi'h v'ucolwlii!hts, tirat dooi I' ;f..;r LhT W'U'r. nnd Ucnlir lu nil kinds oi imroh w f All li I kludb olUrulu Bopy. 'II W. EDGAR, Siibiuehuuiia 1'lnnii f. miii I 'ami llox Mauii&ictinW, 1 e Mill VOLUMEVI.---NO.10. Bnclr Horu. Jl & (l.W. Ik BHOEMAKEK, dealers In dry enods, Eroceicrles and Kcnornl merchnndso Orangovillo Directory, D II. lIEltniNd & nilOTlIEIt.Carncntcrsnnd , Ilullders, Jlaln st bolow Hue. IUCK IIOTEfi nnd refreshment Paloon, by Hour ji'iicury cor.oi iiaiu nuu I'luosi, DIt. O. A. JlEGAHUEL.l'hystclan and Surgeon Jlaln st,, next door to Good's Hotel, 1VWID HKltUINa, Klournnd Grist Mill, nud 1 Denier In grain, Mill Street. JAMESIl.lIAIlMAH.CablnetJInkor Bud Un. dcrtakcr. Jlnln St., below I'lno, JCIIUYI.EII & CO., Iron fonnners, Jlachlnlsls j nud Jlnuuractuicrs ofplows, Mill St AMUELBHAltl'LESS.JIakeroftlioIIayhnrst Grain Cradle. Jlnln St. 17II.LIAJI DEI.ONO Shoemaker ntnl manufae V turcrof llrlck, JIlllst.,westofl,iuo Philadelphia Directory. jjoE.aiouiia;uiiAii iiaz.Ii Restaurant anil Diniii Booms. FRANK SMITH, Proprietor. rillLADEU'lIIA, N. H. Tho location Is ccntrnl, tho iiMlstnnti nttcutive, and tlio tnblesbupplledwltli tho best tho market nllords, Ircsh nud veil cooked. Givo him a cull. "AINWRIGIIT & CO., WHOLESALE GROCERS, N. E. Comer Second and Arch Streets, PlIILADELVIIIA, Dealers lu TEAM, SYRUPS, COKFEE, SUOAH, JIOLASSKi r.tcis, srtcrs, m CAr.n soda, ac, ic. ei-Orders will receive prompt attention, may 10,G7-tf. JJARVEY R. WALKER, VriTlt ME All, SC1IROPP CO. imi'outkiis and joithnnsor CHINA, GLASS AND QUE ENSW A I!E, No. 10S NORTH SECONDST., PHILADELPHIA. iSSr-Origlnal assorted packages of Queenswnro constantly on baud. iebSl'72-tf. Buaincsa Cards. "P II. LITTLE, all. ATTORNEY AT LAW, Ofllco Courl-Honso Alley, below tho COI.CM bian Olllco, Uloomsbnrg Pa. Q IJ. IJRO0KWAY, ATTORNEY AT LAW, JlLOOMSntlRO, rA. S- Okkick Court Houeo Alley, in tho Co- I.UMliiAN building. Jan4,'V7. c 1 AV. MILLER, ATTORNEY AT LAW, Olllcc Court llouso Alloy, below tho Coluji niANOlllcc. llouutles, Hack-Pny nnd Pensions collected. llloonisburg Pa. sep.'J0'(i7 JOHN M. CLARK, ATTORNEY AT LAW. OFFICE abovo Howcr's Blorc, Jlaln street, jllooinsburg, l'a. JODEP.T V. CLARK, ATTORNEY AT LAW, Ollleo Main HlrrM. hulow Ihn Court Hniibn. Dloomsbuig l'cnu'n. D FIIANK ZARR ATf ORNEY AT LAW, RLOOMSIlUltO, PA. Olllco ,llh ,1. a. Freeze.Iirower'a lllock. Can bo cousnlted lu Germac or English. mchBTO-tf IIIARLES C. IjEIDY, ATTOlt K K Y-AT- LAW . OFFICE ON OAK STREET, MOUNT CARJIEL NOIlTlIU.MUr.UI.AHD COU.VTY, 1"A. Collections promptly made, Comejanelng neatly executed mi' nllotlier business connect ed with bis polcbslon eauMiilly nlleuihd to In Jlontour, Niirthumbeilnud and Ccdumbla eonu lies. nis.lb71-li. EW STOVE AND TlJN SHOP. ISAIAH 1IAGENIJUCH, JInlll Htvce.t nun ilnnr nhniM T.?. M.inlfmhnlla Store. A laigo assortment of Stoves. Healers nnd Ranges constantly ou hund, and for Ealo nt tho lowiht rates. TlUUlllEI lunll Us liriLnclipRpArrfiillvntlMulAilfn nnd satisfaction Ruarauteed. jiwtKi an rxiuuH wuoicbaio auu retail. A lal Is reoucbtod. Janl'71 LOOMSRURa ill AKBI, i: w o r: ii h. :1AI.V STllKET, nKI.OW MA1IKCT, Iil.ou.MSIlUltU, p.. JInntiments, Tombs, Headstones, Ac. Work neatly exu utid. Oideis liy mall will receive special nttentlou. N. II. Work delivered lieu ot charge. T. L. GUNTON. Proprh-lor. octl3'71-tf. 1. O. IIox 1S7. "yETERlNARY. AUGUST FRIEND, lato lit.ni Grimnny. oia-rs his beivlits lo th'. public as n coll brnted HORSE AND COW DOCTOR, and nil other nulmnls, for which his ehniges niu modeinte. Ho enn nlwnys bo lov.nd east blJo 01 Uerwlck load, ncaiS.II. Jacoby' Jlarblo Yi'td. lilooiubbuiTf, Jlay 12. 1S71-1V. JARAINH IJAliaAINH UUICir KAZ.T.'i ABU &MAI.I, l'llOriT.t. SAVE YOUlt MONEY. Oo to , HENRY VOST, Last Rloombbuig I'n., lor all kinds nf tbfiljtot homo and city inndo ruiiHiiuni:. Prices icus.iuablo and tho be .rk ilonf. janl'71 U "yULOAN WORKS, DANVILLE PA. WILLIAJI II. LAW, Miinuracturcr of Wrouglit Iron Ihldje. Rollers, GaMioldirs, Fireproof liulldlugs. WiimKbt lion Hoofing, ltootlnir Finmes, Fluorlur; and Doors, 1 arm Gates nud fencing, also Wiowfbtlron pip. lug, Stacks uud nil kinds of SiuRn Work. Ac. Repalis promptly uttended to. N. H. Drnwlngs nud Estimates Mipplled. oeli7'71-Iy. J. THORNTON v... ......... ..u..w..t.kv i iu v.t,,.bijn i.i i,:tjii.in- illl mill vIMnlt v I lint lin tin Ino, i.nnlnjs.i iiii J. L-mil,l nHnnnnnnln Ihn Afti.r nud complete ubsoitmeut of WALL PAPER, WINDOW SHADES, riXTunrs, COl'.DS, TAttSULH, nnd nil other goods In his lino of business, jui tho newest aud mud. appioved pnttcius ni mo day nro nlvnys to be l .uud in blxufctaUllKUn lent. Mar.5,'0S-tI Jlnlu Ut. below Marl rot. ..?,'J.YOI,lrj tori:, AND LIVERIWiU I'l-VAN1 1. ULL-POWEKK1) STEAMSIUFS. .JA',H1X I'AROICST IN THE WORLD. OCI.AN1C, x,mCEWlC. lli:i'UllI.IC, A'lLANTIO. I1ALTIO, ADRIATIC, ,. . l.i;'0lonsburdun-3,WH)li. p. inch. ' hailing from Now Yoi k on SATU R I ) A Yfl, fi otn ihloCdr.o.ro'wnll.Ulml,AYa' Uu"J "' Jerbey'city. W B,ar 1)0ck' '""Vouln Fury, Pnbbenger nccommodatlons (for nil clab-scs) tiurlvallid, combining ' SAFETY, Hl'El'.D, AND COJIFORT. I'W- i Saloons, ktate-iuoins, btuoklna-room nnd bath ooius n inldbhlp kcclloii, wheto loust motion ii lelt. Suigeous uud HewnidCiScs nccomiuiuy llirso ktcnmcis. I ltATEb-Hnloon.SSOKOld. Blcerago, 830ctnien. cy. , lhoso wlkhlug to siudforlrUndsfioni tho H.y,V,ou!llr'.or,'"1 uow obMa 'tccingo iirepald cortlUcates, J33 curioncy. i-im l'uksenKers booked to or from nil parts of H.'d'fiJ.'isV.lffi. elf, N0,wa'- ii?ocl!r''.l0n "'"'' giunlcd nt lowest rates, Dialls from il upwards, n.-SSViT?1 Siu,c,IP!'h'"'ltherlnformntIou. apply to No. io llroadway. New York, n , J. II. HPAIIKH. Ascut, l,,,r r 10 W. PEACOCK, ' Jntl?tr lllooiiiklmrc I'll, MiacollauoonB. T ENTIBT11Y. H. O. HOWElt. DENTIST, Hcspcctfully oilers his professional services to the ladles nnd Konllemon of Dloomsbtirg nud vl olnlty. Ho Is prepared to attend to nil tho vnrl. ousoperntlons In tho llnoof his profession, nnd Is provided Willi tho latest Improved 1'oiicki.ain Tkktii which will bo Inserted on gold plntlng silver nnd rubber baso to look ns well nstho nnl oral teeth. Tooth extracted by nil tho new nnd mostnpprovcd methods, nnd nil operations on tho teeth carefully nnd propotly nttended to. Rcsldpiico nnd olllco a low doors nhovo tho Court House, same side. Illoomsburg, Jnn.1'71 17 IJIIIE GREAT MAGICAL EI A I K F O 11 C JU It J Will force a bcniillml pet of Whiskers or JIns tacho, In from two to threo months, on any per son over twelve years old. Jtlsouuof tho best preparations to mnke tho whiskers grow that ovcrwns known. Ono boltlo or It Issulllclcnt to produce a very stroiiR btnrd. It docs not In any wny stnlu or Injuio tho skin. Try Itl It Is no humbug. Prlco 8.1 cents per botllo. Bent by mall post pnld, tn any nddrcts, on receipt ol price. Address WILLIAJI C. WAGNER, Aiendtsvllle, ug.i 71-ly. Adums County, 1'cnna TKS RANGE AGENCY. Wynrulnu $211,000 Aitnn 4,000,01 v Fulton N. Y I'iO.IXXI North Amtrlca SbO.OO City 450,000 Ititurnntlnnnl N.Y 1,100,000 Nlagi.rn N.Y', 1,000.00 Morrhnnts :i'lo,ooo Hprlneileid 570,oifl Farmers' Danvllle.N.Y SW.ouii Albany City 400.000 Danvlllo, Horso Thelt Jlntnol. Atlantle, N. Y l,(O0,0(O Gcrmanla, N, Y 500,000 FREAU IIROWN. Aiie. DiniSI'7l ly, IlLoovanciio I'n. II A INK LEY KNITTING MACHINE THE SIMPLEST, CHEAPEST AND REST IN USEI HAS HUT ONE NEEDLE 1 A CHILD CAN RUN IT I Designed especially for tho use of families, nud ndlct; Mho dcklro to knit for tho market. Will do eveiy ktllch of tho knitting lu a slocking, widening and nnrrowiugns readily ns by hand. Are Fplendld for worsteds nnd fancy work, TAKING FIVE DIFFERENT KINDS OF STITCH I Aro cry (nsy to mniinge, nnd not linblo lo tct out of order. Kvery Family should have one. Wo want nn Agent In every town to lntrodnco nud sell them, tu whom wo oifcr the most liberal Inducements. Send forourClicularandSamplo Stocking. Address. HINKLEY KNITTING JIACHINECO., uov. lo,'7l-ly, Hat b, JIo. C. HOWE R, has opened n flrst-elAbs BOOT. SHOE. HAT CAP, AND iUR STORE. nt theold stand on Main Street, llloomsburg.nrow doors nbovo tho Court House. Ills stock lscom posedof thovery latestnud bcsthlyles ever ollcr ed to the citizens ot Columbia County, Ho enn accommodate tho public with tho following goods nt the lowest rates. Men's hoavy doublo koled stoga boots, men's doublo nnd single tap boled kip boots, men's heavy stoga shoes of oil kinds, men's lino boots and shoes of all grades, boy's doublo soled boots nnd, shoes ol nil kinds, men's glovokid Balmoral khoes.men's, women's, boys's and misses' lastlug gaiters, women's glovo l:ld Rolish very llno.womeu's morocco llalmorals and calf shoes, women's very lino kid buttoned gait ers. In short boots ol all descriptions both peg gcd nnd sewed. Ho would also call attention to his Sno assort ment of ATS, CAPS, FUUS AND NOTIONS. which comprises nil tho new nud popnlni vnrl ollesnt priceswblch cnunotf.Ulto suit all. These goods nro ollurcd nt tho lowest cash latoi and will bo guaranteed to glvo katlslacUou. A call Is solicited betoro purchasing clsewhero as It la believed that better bargalnn nro to bo found than nt any other plsco lu tho county. Jan 1'71 MpiIE ORANGEVILLE MANUFAC- JL TURING COJIPANY. .MANUFAC7Ur.l:nS 01' ACTUIUULT UJIAL IMPLEMENTS o the most Approved Patterns. 33 in cJiir, Jol;1)Iit, I'll si i nt; h of nil descilplions. JlEALEIia IN Genenil Mcrcl.'antlise, Lumber, Ac, Ac. ORANGEVILLE, PA. Wo would announce' to the Public In general Ihfit wo Imvn tnlru tl,n Well known Airl lclll 1 111'- nl Woiks of this placo a uelflhallmnko Hour aim in jiuiiiui.iciiiru r irsi i;ui " .h..-"ii"". .ini'ic ments cnual tonnv other mrdtem iu tho Stiile, such as Tlncsliiiif,' iiia lJSMas, Roth Lover and Tread Power. iMoiv.s ol' cvci'j- lies crljsiEosi. among which will bo the celebrated KNOR MOUNTAIN Il'ERO, ncknowledged by nil to bo tho best idowcxlant lortliBl.irmer. Also tho C!i:iihi1oii, .Sterns' lnf ct U nnd Tlio illoiitrosc. ALSO, DOUIJLE CORN PLO-WsS, 3Ju3ll-.:i!oi'M, 2 roil DLcIUcn, :jii1 i'astiims of every dcscilptlou. Wo shall uso nono but th'O ucsi maieriaisnun ismpioy 110110 uui tumpiueiii- anu experienceu mwiiauics auu our puces win cimpaio l.ivorably with any other iuaaufaismv irs. Country Pro luce, Lumber, Old Iron, taken lu exchange. Wo also bavon stoio In counecttion wltli our Agilcullur.il Works, wher.i may be lound ft full nssoitment of MERCHANDISE which wilt bo sold nt small piollts. Olvo us n call bcloio puichnslng elsowhero aud wo gua' uuteo sntlst.ictlou. m'ircb'-'J'7J-ly. Hotcla. ENTON HOTEL. V. V. PI ATI'. Projiriutor, UENTON, COLUMUIA COUNTY, PA. This well known House having been put In tborontih u pair is now open for tho leceptlon ol visltoris. No pains havo been spaicd to ensuie tho pcilcet eomlort ot guistif, Tho proprietor also juns a Slntjo lium thu Hotel to llloomsbuig auJ lutormedliito points on Tuesday, Thurtday and Sutuiday ol cuch week. Ju P1S71 rpjli J2SPY HOTEL. 3JU"V, COLUJIlilA COUNTY, PA. Tlio undeisigncd vould lufutm tho travelling nubile Hint In. has taken tho abovo named cslnb ilshiacntaud thoioughly refitted tho i.aiuo for tho perfect convenience, of hlsguiBts. ills larder will bo slot kid with tli" best tuo market ntlords, Tha choicest llrjuors, wines and clgarbnlwnyu to in- luuua in i is oar. WILLIAM PJ-n'TlT. Fopv, I'n. THE NATION Its Rulora and Institutions. JN ENGLISH AND GERMAN. Nothing llko It. Strikes everybody nsjust the 'look ihey need. It is uu Knrjelopicdhi of the Uoverument. Siuulo nnges In It. mo ot them. selves woith tho pi lea ut tho book. Oiw 500 and mil I'V.OO, A nil h llurvcki for Cauvubsus Indlis uud gentlemeu fanners, teacbersnnd students. Oiieugml took'.i ordtrt iuaeui ilain, with ctmclar ulonc, beore the book upcart it, 8MO .i iluy can bo cleuicd lu fair ten lluiy. Wllto at omo tor Circular nud information. NEW wimi 11 t'liui.iniiini, lu., tor. uu nnu mar lictStieets.Plilladelphla, foci, 0,'71-ly.J PERFECT COMBUSTION. SIGNAL LIGHT. The llr.it tmd only self-feeding Anthracite Coal .atuvu ever invented nun. win rencciiy Cuusuinu all tho gases. Wnminled tho REST HEAllNU 8TOV1 tho country. Kcnd for Prico List nud Clicular tn M1TC11ELI-. SIEVE.NSON A CO., j-lnvo Mnuulafluii'rs, Plllsburnh, I'a, lu jfjj" Mf Mflf Iff f lb IP t w III W f w BLOOMSBTJRG, PA., Poetical. Siinrrows In Winter, llrcad on tho stones Is c.ist , TIs Winters aud tho slouos nro snowy cold i Yet. llutlcrlnB fast From leafless trees tho sparrows, young nnd old i Flock lu their hunger, lo bo fed, And on tho cold stones find their dnlly bread. Love, with n liberal hand, Throws out Its crumbs! then suddenly with. draws, Hidden to stand And wnlch, behind tho window curtain's gaur.e, Lost human lace, too nigh, should senro Tho timid birdies from their slmplo fare, And they nro glad, aud feed, Willi eager cyo j and llvo on dally love, Yet feel none. Greed And passion stirs their Ilttlo breasts, nnd move To bickering wars with wing nnd bill j Yet lovo looks smiling on, nuifccds them still. Hnrd Is this world, and cold , And toll, care, woo nnd Bin nro everywhere. Yet souls untold Como from nbovo to find their stibstnnco hero ! And, 'midst tho stony drought forlorn, Find mnunn waiting for them every morn. God gives that bread from heaven, And yet Ills Presence not In glorious blnzo Of flro is given! Uut hidden under veils, lest the brlghtTYvrs Of awful light nud beauty hero Consume, tho sinful soul with deadly fear. Mnn f.nl nn,l ISah nin nlml They seo not God, Iho Unseen j nud Ihey turn wun envy mau, And o'er Iho vory gifts of Lovo they bum ; Vnf f1.tl.Hnr, fnn.1 n.l run! tall I -., !.. ".fcl --.., . ...... And patient God bees, loves, and feeds them still. Church Journal. Miscellaneous. lt.VlLitOAl) I.Vi:.STI(iATI0.. Mr. I5RO0KWAY, from the sub committee, appointed by tho Judiciary Couimlttco to investigate certain ro turns made by tho railroads to tho Auditor General, under llouso resolu tion of January 1", 1872, made report, which was road ns follows : Tho original resolution under which tho Bub-commlltco acted read as fol lows : licsoh-cd. That tho General Judiciary Committee of this Homo bo instructed to inqmro if any railroads chartered by this Commonwealth, and now owninir coal lands or operating collieries in this State, have mado false or incorrect ro- iurn3 lo tlio Licgisiiuuro or to tlio Aud itor General as to tho amount of their capital stock dividends, leal estnte, tonnago or gross receipts, or nuvo with held from tho Commonwealth any taxes uiion tlio same, with nowcr to send for persons and papers upon reas onable cause for investigation being shown. For tho purpose of tho investigation contemplated by this resolution, n sub committee was appointed, with author ity to examine -first, a return, Ac, of tho Delaware, Lackawanna and Wes tern railroad company. Ry invitation of tho company thocommitteo proceed ed lo Now York aud took a mass of tes timony, which is herewith submitted. On tho 11th March, by instruction of tlioClcneral Judiciary Committee, tho following additional resolution was offered and passed : Jlcsolved, That tho powers of tho sub committee appointed by tho General ludlciury (jommnieo tinner tno resolu tion of January 17, 1872, relative to in- votiUgating tno returns, Ac, ol certain ruilaoads.bo extended to such canals and railroad companies chartered by tho Legislature as tho comtnittco have rea son to believe havo made improper re turns, withheld taxes duo the Common wealth, or otiicrwiso violated tneir charters. Tho sub-committee wore also instruct ed to prepare a bill to cover tiny defects that might exist under our present laws, and which might make our system of taxes upon corporations uniform, equal, just and intelligible. Siuco tho passago of tho last resolution, tho sub-coimnit-teo havo boon ablo t accomplish hut little, not only beeausoof tho shortness of tho time until thoclosoof tho sessiou but because several important witnesses evaded tho service of the .subpioaa or fall&i to attend when .subpmntiud. A number of important facts, howover, iiave hocn elicited, and they demon strate the necessity for an immediate and eomprelieiisivo change iu our tnx Jaws, so far as relates to railroad and cn.nl companies a rovlslon which, whllo not too burdonsomo upou such corporations, shall bo equal In Its oper ations, constitutional In Its provisions, nnd not subject either tho companies or tho Commonwealth lo tedious uud ex pensive litigation, norle.ive Iho ofrkers of tho Commonwealth lu doubt as to what is romiiroJ at their hands. Our tJtz laws, us they now stand, urn a hope- leasjumble, impossible to execute, nud two-thirds of tho taxes imposed by .them lire not paid. IntJioftrit place, ihuro is it tax ou c.ipital slock of oiw half a mill for each auamal per cent, of dividend, Imposed originally, wo believe, iu 1811 and mod- lfli'd In 1809, and which is now collected untie'- iho fuurth section of tho act of May ist, 18GS. This tax, wo believe, is not ti. subject of litigation, nud Is ro portt d uud paid annually, for the year eiidliiti with the flxst Monday in No vember.. In AprH.lMi 1,r toiin.igo taxwas also put upon c.ii'i'ylJig companies, which sooms lo have liotti re-enacted substantially In August if the same year. This ton lingo was dJvitJtd into threo classes, the tax upon wii.'cl! was lij'cd ut two, three and live cutis per ton, according to tho tlassillcation. This tux uodv constitutes tho rwvonth nectloti of tlio net of 185S, return.) of thu tonnage iwid payment of tho t.i:: thereon being required quarter ly. Appeals were taken by eovoral com panies from tho imposition of this tax on tho ground that it was unconstitu tional, so far ns lolaled to through Stato toniiago; mid Judgo Pearson sustained thu cumminitH. No writ of error was taken from tlio decision. Tho next question rabrd was whether lUu tax could bo imposi'd upon tonuiigo taU u up without and laid down within lliefilato, or InUen up within uud laid down without? Judgo Pearson also decided that uueoii&tltutlonul ; but his decision was reversed by tho Supremo Court of Pennsylvania nnd tho caso taken to tlio United States Supremo Court, where It Is now pending. In tho meantlmo tho companies uro pay ing tho tonnaco tax, nt nccoruing to tho decision if the Supremo Court of FRIDAY, MAY 10, Pennsylvania, but according to that qf Jiulgc 1'earton. Tho commlttco havo also discovered that sovcrnl of tho heavi est carrying companies make no roturn of tho tounngo lu dlsputo, so that in caso of n favorable decision in tho Uni ted Flutes Supremo Court, tho amount duo tlio Commonwealth could not bo easily nscertnlned. In fact, lu case of the loss or nb3tractlon of tlio papors of tho non-reporting companies, no settlement could over bo reached. In 1860 nn net was also passed placing a tnx of threo-fourths of ono por cent, on lliogross receipts of railroad companies, returns of which wcro to bo mado semi annually, nnd this constitutes tho 8th section of tho codified act of 1 80S. Tho companies also resisted tho paymont of this tax so far ns it was laid upon tho gross receipts from business originating outsldo of tho Stato. Judgo Pearson also rulod thl3 question In favor of tho companies nnd ho was again reversed by tho Supremo Court of Pennsylvania. Appeals wcro taken to tho United States Supremo Court, whero tho ques tion now hangs'. In this ns In tho ton iiago reports many companies mako no return of tho amount In dispute. In 1801 nnothcr tax law wa3 passed, icqulrlug tlio olllccrs of railroad com panies nnd sorao other corporations to retain from the Interest paid Its bond holders, or other creditors, fivo per centum and roturn tmd pay the samo to tho Stnlo Treasurer seml-nnnually. That act constitutes section 11th of tho consolidated net of 18C8. This tax, so far ns it affected non-residents, was nlso claimed lo bo unconstitutional, but Judgo Pearson, guided by a previous ruling of tlio Supremo Court in tho caso oi Maltby vs. tho Reading and Colum bia Railroad (second P. F. Smith's re port), held that such tn was constitu tional and payablo out of tho interest duo bondholders or creditors. Ho was sustained by tho Supremo Court of Pennsylvania on tho ground that tho property of non-residents was taxablo in tills Stato ; and that they should pay their quota of tax to tho sovereignty which gavo tho franchises from which their profits wcro derived aud which protected tho property taxed. Appeals were taken from this decision to tho Supremo Court of tlio United States. Again, no report is mado of tho lloat ing debt upon which interest is paid. Tlio act says : That tho tax Is to bo re tained from tho interest paid bondhold ers ami creditors. Tho Committeo discovered that tho Delaware, Lacka wanna and Western Railroad Company returns no account of interest paid, save to the bondholders (and oven that un der protest), nlthough that paid to other creditors is equally taxable. At (ho dale of our examination tho company were paying interest to creditors other than bondholders, on about threo hun dred and twenty thousand dollars; nnd they havo furnished a statement show ing t payment of interest on floating debt amounting lo two hundred and thirteen thousand two hundred nnd thirty seven dollars and cighty-nlno cents from 1S0O lo 1871, both years in clusive. Tho companies allege that tho department never demanded it. In 1S07 an net was also passed requir ing certain transportation companies possessing the right to mine, purchase or sell anthracito coal, to report quar terly the amount of co.il mined or pur chased by them, andipay a tax of four cents por ton thereon. Wo beliovo tho legality of this act is not questioned. It forms section nlno of tho act of 1S03. If tho position assumed by these com panies bo correct, our legislation dis criminates against tho interests of our own citizens. They must pay a heavier tax on tonnago than tho citizen? of Now York or Uiltlmore, and their bonds uro subjected to n tax from which non-residents would bo exempt. Wo beliovo that our laws should bo so framed as to invito foreign capital, but domestic In vestment and domestic consumption should not bo moro heavily taxed than the investments of non-residents, or tho consumption of our produce by citizens of other States. A few Illustrations nlono will ahoy the terriblo falling oil' of our revenue. In 18flfi, tlio Delaware, Lackawanna and Western Railroad Company paid the Stato a tax on capital stock of ono hundred and ninety-eight thousand nino hundred and fifty-one dollars and twel vo cents; In 1871 it only amounted to fifty four thousand six hundred and eighty- two dollars and eleven cents ; in 1SC0 tho tax on givs reci-Ipts ttmounled to three thousand seven bundled and twenty eight dollars nud seventy-two cents; in 1871 to ouo thousand six hundred and ninety eight dollars and thirty-nine cents. In 1807 (thero being no report for ISO j) tho tax ou tonnage reached eight thousaudonohundredaiidsovoiity' sovon dollars nnd nlnoly cents; In 1871 only ono thousand six hundred and olghty llvo dollars and eighty four cents, nud yet Iho receipts of tho com pany In IfiGO were eight million two hundred and fifty-two thousand four cents ; nnd Iu 1871 had iticreused to eleven million seven hundred nud nine thousand ouo hundred nnd forty six dollars and nlncty-sevcn cents. In n word tho rovenuo of tho company was Increased ubotit four millions of dollars and that of tho Stato from tho sources named full oil' about ouo half. Again, the coal transportation of tho Lehigh Valley Railroad Company for tho last quarter was over ono million tons, yet under their construction of tho law, they return ns subject to, taxation threo hundred and thirty ono thousand tons, or less than ono-third. Iu New York, us wo learn by n com munication from Governor Hoil'maii, tho system of taxation upon railroads Is r.ulicilly different they uro taxed through tho county olllcers ulouo ; that Is to say, tho real oslnto Is taxed in each county for such portion of It us lies In tho comity, and tho personal property is tnxed nt Iho place of tho principal o 111 CD. Thu shaio out of this duo tho Btnto for Stato tax Is paid by each couiiiy treasurer to tho Stnto Treasury. . In Now Jersey tho most of tho rail- load corporations nro required lo pay nn mtniinl taxofono-lialfofonopercciituin 1872. UOL. on tho cost of road, equipments nnd ap pendages, as soon ns nny portion of tho road Is In operation. In fact, her rovo nuo last year from tax on railroads was flvo hundred and ton thousand two hun dred nnd ten dollars nnd twenty-six cents. Wo aro not Informed whother Mary land has any general system or not, but tho Northern Central railroad company pays nn annuity of ninety thousand dollars, although only thirty-six miles of tho ono hundred nnd nlnoty-nino owned and controlled by It aro in Hint State A comparison of tho amount of rovenuo derived by tho Slnto from somo of tlio railroads chortorod by it and thoso leased by them In adjoining States may provo of interest In tho solution of this question. Tho Delaware, Lacka wanna and Western railroad company has n trunk lino in this Stato ono hun dred nnd fifteen mile3 long, nnd extend ing from tlio Delawaro river nt tho Water Gap to Iho Now York Stato lino near IJInghamton. It holds In leaso also In tho Stato of Now York, tho Val ley railroad extending from tho Stato lino to Blnghampton j tho Cayuga and Susquehanna railroad, nbout thirty-four miles long; tho Syracuso nnd Oswego railroad, about thirty-six miles long; tho Qrccno railroad, eight miles long ; and tho Utica, Chenango nud Susquo hnnna Valley railroad, about soventy sovon miles long. In Now Jersey tho samo corporation holds under leaso the Warren railroad, nbout eighteen miles long, and tho Morris nnd Essex railroad and its branches, about eighty-four miles long, ft also controls n majority of tho stock in tho Lackawanna nnd Illoomsburg railroad, which Is eighty miles In length. The committeo Is also informed Hint n consolidation lias been mnde by tho Delaware, Lacknwanna and Western railroad company and tho Now Jersey Central, and tho stock controlled by it. Tho capital stock of tlio Delawaro Lackawanna and Western railroad company proper, on the 20th of last January, was nineteen million four hundred and four thousand nnd ono hundred dollars, nnd its length ono hundred and fifteen miles; yet, al though its tonnago and business is do rived from tho coal mined nnd tho privileges granted in (his State, it only paid Into tho treasury, from nil classes of taxes, ono hundred and fourteen thousand six hundred nnd twelve dol lars and twenty-threo cents during tho year 1870, while it paid into the treas ury of Now Jersey last year, on ac count of the Morris and Es3cx road, ono hundred and sixteen thousand five hundred dollars on a capital stock of thirteen milllonslx hundred and ninety eight thousand two hundred and fifty dollars, or nearly six million dollars less, nnd a road thirty-ono miles shorter. Even tho Warren railroad, an exten sion of llio Delaware, Lnekn wanna and Western railroad company, which is only eighteen miles long, paid tho Stato of Now Jersey for lliosame year eleven thousand fivo hundred and lifty saven dollars nnd fifty cents for tax on its capital stock. New York also derives n much greater proportional revenuo than Pennsylvania. Tho Northern Central railroad which owns or has on leaso ono hundred and ninety-niiio miles of railroad in this Stato aud a heavy coal tonnago, has paid into tho treasury on tonnage and gross receipts during tho past six years an average of thlrty-flvo thousand two hundred aud cloven dollars, yet pays tho State of Maryland annually ninety thousand for thirty-six miles of road. Tho investigation developed tho fur ther fact that somo at least of tho rail road corporations owning coal lands In clude their cost in tho construction account returned to tho ;Mato. The Del aware, Lackawanna and Western rail road company, for example, in making returns of the characteristics of its road, reports lu tho summary of payments tho Item of construction nnd equip ment. This ono Item Includes coal lauds, the value of vhlch Is unknown, but which cost tho company in tho aggregate live million ono iiundred nnd forty thousand ono iiundred and ilvo dollars and sixty.ono cent s. This prac tlco wo deem radically wrong, and such composite companies should bo com pelled to Iucludo in their construction account only such Items as laying track, extending road, etc Acaln, their chniters, in mo3t instan ces, limit the number of acres of coal lauds that each cm hold. Tho Delawaro Lackawanna nnd Western owns in Luzorno county, an aggregate of twelvo thousand four hundred and thlrty-fuur acres. This docs not iueludo all tho number of acres of real cstnto held, but bimply what is supposed or known by them to contain coal, nud of that tho corporation alono is thojudgo It may purchasu fivo hundred acres and yet claim that only two hundred of it is coal lanJ. Tho samo company also claims tho right to chnrgo unlimited rates of freight although in this respect it Is tinder tho general railroad law of 1819. On this point General Urlsbln, tho general nd visor of tho company and ono of Its mnnagcis, lu his testimony, says: "Tho opinion, of our counsel is, and that is my opinion that wliero tho transporta Hon is In the companies' cars, tho gen era! railroad law of Pennsylvania im poics no limit as to tho rato that may bo charged ; but whero thu transporta' Hon is iu bhippers' cars thcroia a limit. If this Is tttie, thoelghtcouth section of tho general railroad law of 1819, which limits rates of freight, Is practically n nullity, nnd eoiuu now net should bo passed which will limit tho tolls of railroads hereafter to bo created. Tho codified act of 180S, relative to taxing corporations, provldos that ovory rail rcutl company incorporated under nuy law of lids Commonwealth, shall mako an annual written report to the Auditor General, stating specifically tho nmouut of capital paid In,niul tho dato.umounts nud ruto of ovory dividend declared by such corporation during tho yenr end lug with tho first Monday of said month aud In caso of neglect or refusal, by tho thirty-first of Decombor of each year. tho accounting olllcors of this Com 1 A WlluK DEM. - VOL. XXXVI NO. 12, rnonwonlth nro required to ndd ten per centum to tho tax of said corporation for each year In which tho report was not furnished; nnd If tho corporation should vlolato this provision for threo successive years, tho Governor may do claro tho charter of such corporation forfeited. It Is in ovldcnco boforo tho Committeo that tho Delaware, Lackawanna and Western railroad company declared a dividend DccomberOl, 1870, amounting to ono million ono hundred and ten thousand flvo hundred dollars in stock of tho Morris and Essex railroad com pany, nnd that tho fact appeared In tho statistical return to tho Auditor Goncral for that year, nud was so published by him. Tho market valuoof that stock was olghty-six por centum, nnd It was so returned, nnd tho ovldcnco of Gen. Brlsbln corroborated tho return. This dividend, however, upon which thero was n Stato tax of over thirty-two thou sand dollars (not including tho ten per centum authorized to bo charged,) was not paid tho Stalo until tho day after tho committeo had finished its Investi gation. Tlio treasurer of tho company then claimed In a communication a few days later to tho Auditor General, that tho market valuo of tho Morris and Essex stock was eighty-flvo per centum, and stated that "tho object of making six per centum in tho Morris and Essex stock was to cnnblo tho shareholders to reallza flvo por cent, cash, which thoy could do if they sold M. and E. slock at eighty-threo and a half por cent.," and ho asked the Auditor General to credit tho tax on tho difference. The oxcuso given by General Brlsbln for tho non-payment of tills largo amount when duo was "that tho treasurer of tho company had not yet mado his ro turn of dividends for the year 1871, in which that dividend should appear, simply becauso, and for no other reason, than that ho ha3 not received, although ho has written for them, tho blank forms that aro usually furnished him for tho making of a dividend report." Mr. Forstcr, tho former corporation clerk in tho Auditor General's ofllce, states that ho did not know that such a dividend had been declared. This tax was duo January loth. The committeo do not beliovo this to bo a valid reason for the violation of a plain statuto law, nor aro they awaro that tho Stato authorities are bound to furnish any such blanks. " Tho act of 1808 also requires that thero shall bo a quarterly report of tho tonnago of nil railroad corporations. An examination of tho books of tho com pany showed that under dato of Decem ber Cist, 1870, thero was duo to tho Commonwealth a tonnago tax amount ing to $038 12. Up to the time tho com mittee mado their investigation this amount bud not been paid. Mr. Carryl, tho auditor of tho com pany, testified as follows: "It is my belief that tho amount has novcr been paid ; Iliavoso roportcd it to tho treas urer ; it stands lo tho credit of the Com monwealth nnd ready to be paid at any Huso; the treasurer of tho comnanv has told mo that ho had mado tho ro turn to tho Stato officers, but that ho had received no blank in return." Tho Auditor General publishes annu ally a statistical report of all railroad and canal companies doing bu3iness in this State. Ho furnishes each company a blank scries of interrogatori03 which they nro required to fill out and roturn. Theso returns, if full nud eorrect.would bo exceedingly useful to tho people, but such is not tho case. Tho Northern Central railroad company, foroxamplo only report tho amount of tax paid tho Stato on capital stock, amounting to nlno thousand two hundred and thirty- eight dollars and ono cent, whllo no mention is mado of other taxes paid, or tho reason why they nro withheld. Tho Delaware, Lackawanna and Western railroad has nlso uniformly failed to re port tho rato -charged per ton per nillo for freight. Mr. Forster, in answer to tho question as to whether tho statist! cal report is correct so far as relates lo taxation, replied, "I supposo It 13 cor rect, but 1 do not know whether tho person who arranges thoso reports for publication thinks of examining as to that point." Ho also states that tho published statistical report "gives no correct data as to tho amount of taxa tion Imposed upon a company for any particular year." Tho Commlttco are of tho opinion that upwards of three million of dollars aro duo to tho Commonwealth from corporations. Our existing laws on tho subject of taxation should bo amended, oveu if the decision of tho Supremo Court bo favorablo to tho Stnto ; nnd If It should bo adverse, tho greater the necessity for providing other means of enforcing rovenuo from corporations. Each compauy should bo compollcd to mako full returns, nud uot bo permitted toexorclso its discretion as to renort ing what Is taxablo and what is not. To frame such a law would reqtiiro full data, much labor, nnd a thorough Unowledgo of existing laws. C. B. Brocicway, THAI), m. Maiion, Geo. W. Fleecier, CUAB. A. PORTER, A. Woolevuu. A Touching Story iiy Don Piatt A Sunday school superintendent out In Alaska treated his cntlro chargo to a sleigh ride. Thero were Just iorty-ono of tho cherubs nnd n six-horso sleigh. On their way homo they wero beset by a pack of ferocious wolves. Cool nud collected iu that hour of fearful trial, tho heroic superintendent saw at glaueo that ho must bo overtaken. In uu lustnnt his quick nilud grasped tho only chatico of escape Seizing tho child that always sung "I want to bo nn nngol I'1 two notes too high, ho Hung it to tho rapacious horde. It stayed tneir onward courso for n moment piext cimo tno urchin who nover brought uny pennies tc tho heathen And so on swept tho pursuers until tho lust Infant was exhausted. But tho bravo follow had economised his mate rial nobly. And, besides, n wiiolo Sun day school slows off wolves perceptibly wo nuvo niways uoticou this, lu nn other moment tho sleigh dashed Into tho village, and tho grand, uoblo, true Hearted man know that ho was saved I BATES OF ATWFRTISrNG. Ono Inch, (Iwdvo linn or tin cnMlvftlfBl In Nonpareil typo) ono or tvro Insertions, 1.50 llireo Insertions, jl 4V" srAin ltt. -m, ia. eu. lr. Ouo Inch tJl Aft 1111 W lp.10 Two ificncn jm w ,m is.wj Threo inches 5,00 7,00 9.00 ls,oo 18 oo Kotir Inches............. 7,00 9,00 11,00 17,03 SH,OT quarter column lo.io 12,0) n,oo ao,oo 80.ro Half column. ..lwo lsjio sn.oo m.oo m.m ono column 80,uo 36,00 40,00 00,00 loo.uo Kxoenlor's or Administrator's Kotlco. 11.(0 Auditor's or Assignee's Notice, 12,60. Local notices, twenty cents a lino. fnr.li In IIib "TtnulnAM Dlrnctorr" column. 12.00 ner rear for tho first lwo lines, and $1.00 fur each additional lino. Humorous. 1'raUltehtwujMcMichl Scnat Is ono of tho Boards of Government in Russia. Why Is nn opened bottlo of chain pagno llko an orphan ? Becauso it has lost Its pop. A Brookfi eld tnnu has named a prlzo rooster Robinson, becauso Robin son Crusoe A Now Haven parrot barks so near llko a dog that every cat in tho neigh borhood has grown prematurely gray. A New York apothecary announces, "Buy your vacclno virus hero, our calf is a uroat deal sicker than that of any other establishment." In Boston ,a "total abstinence society" has been started, which announces as Its object, "total ab3tinonco from med dling in othor peoplo's nft"alrs." A printer's dovil, In an Omaha of flco was bitten by a dog a fow day since. Tho dog lingered several days and then died In great agony. A German butcher in Chicago hung out tho followlnir slirn : "Four pounds of bologna for fifty cents." Somo wag ndded, with chalk, "Dog cheap." A minister not loner aco preached from tho text, "Bo ye, therefore, stead fasti" but tho printer mado him ex pound from "Bo yo there for break fast." An Eistern oxchango has this erratum: "In our paragraph yo3torday concern ing thirteen ministers who had been snankod In Infancy, for spanked read sprinkled." A California obituary: "Tho deceas ed was a talented man of romantic na ture. Ho placed tho butt onus gun in tho tiro whllo ho looked down tho muz zlo and dopartcd henco spontaneously." Vn editor says that tho only reason ho knows of why ids house was uot b own awav tho other day, during a sovero gale, was becauso thero was a heavy morigago upon it. Mrs. Emery, of Indiana, warns all women ncaiust licr tickle, fuithlcss hus band, who has deserted her. Sho says ho may bo recognized by n broken uoso, whjch she demolished with a skillet. An Enclish writer says In his advico to young married women, "that their mother Eve married a gardener." It iniirht bo added that tho caraener. In consequence of tho match, lost his situa tion. In Chicairo the bill stickers aro so enercretic that they so Into tho barbers' shops and pasto handbills on the soles of tho Doots oi tnoso customers wno nro under tho hands of tho man of tho ra zor. In a French court recently, as a wit ness wa3 about to givo his testimony, tho advocate remarked : "This witness is entitled to cntiro confidence, as ho has not had timo to consult with his lawyer." A young lady was practlclng"tho Bat tlo of the Prague" in Brooklyn tho othor night. After sho had played two hours a burglar shot at her through the window. But to tho grief of tlio neigh borbood, ho missed her I "So you aro going to keep a school?" said a young lady to her maiden aunt. "Well, for my part, sooner than do that, I would marry a widower with n'no children." "I would prefer that my self," was tho quiet reply ; "butwhero's tno wiuower Ono of tho latest sensation stories com mences with tho casual remark : "Did you ever, gentlo roader, havo a tussle with a full-grown Bengal tiger?" Tho Chicago Post says: "Wo did, and if tho king had turned, ns we betted it would, we'd have como out $03 ahead." Ono day, when tho great Erkslno was, as usual, onhls way to Westminster Hull with his largo black bag crammed full of briefs, ho was accosted by a man, who asked him if ho was a dealer in old clothes. "No, you Imp," returned the counsellor ; "theso aro all now suits." "Do you think I shall havo Justice done me?" said a culpritto his counsel, a shrewd Kentucky lawyer of tho best class in that eloquent Stato. "I am a little afraid that you won't,"replled tho other; "I seo two men on tho Jury who nro' opposed to hanging." The St. Louis Cin's'anldi.'oeat'esayst "Wo do not protend to account for Satan. We cannot understand tho propriety of his existence nny moro than we can that of General Benjamin Butler, but both are fact3 in tho world, which wo receive upon competent testimony." A rather grand and dramatic stylo of expression came to a sudden collapse in court tho other day. An indignant wit ness exclaimed, "Tho first timo that I over did such n dishonorable act I would blow out my brains, Sir!" " very good," said the counsel : "and what would you do tho secoud timo?" TiiEDanbury (Conn.! AViwsavs: "An individual named Phelps.suftoring from lyspepsla, commenced a series of horse back rides this morning. Ou tho ror.d between hero and Beaver Creek theum mill stepped ono sido to climb ovi rn fence, when Mr. Phelps got oil', Ho s.ix s iding liorseimck cuts tin tno roads tun much." "What timo is it, my dear?" asked wifo of her husband, whom she ttw pected of being drunk, but who w.i doing ids best to look sober. "Well, mv darling, I can't toll," cause, you sit more aro two nanus on my watcii, unu encn ponus to nuiuercnt licruro. mm 1 don't know which to believe." The malls having for n week failed to como to time In nn Arkansas to wi, tho local paper says it has been forced to draw neavny on tno aimunaes lur copy, aud il communication with Hie outer world should bo htlll longur cut off "will be obliged noxt week to mako oxtracts from tho Bible, thus supplying somo of our readers, at lea3t, with mat ter entirely now to tnem. Horaco Greeley heard that they madu 8000 pounds or butter fromslxtoeucosvs. at Danbury. Ho bought a lot at ono , and is going to have them ground un nnd churned. "You seo," said he, "1 cau buy beef utclghtcentsu pound, nnd butter Is worth forty. If it costs two cents a pound for labor, I shall clear threo hundred per cent. Tho man that says this is not so is a liar and n lioiv-o tlUCL" It may servo n vory good puiposo sometimes to be of au inquiring turn of mind, and not willing to put up with nuisances readily. A man lu a Kausas city hotel, a short timo ago, blow out tho gas on retiring, nnd soon after he rushed down stairs full oflndlgnatlon to ascertain If thoro was "a gluo factory noxt door,' If ho had been ono of your contented, easy going mortals ho migbt havo fallou asleep and been suffocated, Au American gentleman nsked un Irishman to givo him tho real vorslon of tho story about tho Kilkenny cats : In reply ho received tho following lines: Thero wnnst was two cats at Kilk enny ; Each thought thero was ouo cat too many ; So thoy quarrollcd and fit, Thoy Ecrutched nnd they bit, Till excepting their nails And tho tips of their talis Instead of two cats, thero wan'l any I"