Ann-
pMflltED KVEIIV FRIDAY M0HNINO
m cottmnf Af litiiLntNO neAiitiik count
uousit, nv
..hi r r- h n f- r I I I I 1 W
m ii 1 1 1 i 1 1 1 1 . i ii i v j i i i i r i
Ettltor ailtl Proprietor. '
!Two Dollars a Year, paraMe In Advance.
aiROXJiiA-Tiorr bboo.
rnn umTfTlNO
(description" executed .U'AJ'c"'"1"" n"U
STOVES -AND TIN WAKE,
i MIPfiHT, dealer In Rtovcs ,t tinware. Un
e'ri block, atnlu st. went of Market. vl-nM
.,. sir.TZ. denier In stoves niul tlnwnro
slnVtrcet, above court homo. vl-nil
CLOTHING, AO.
i roWLNHKItO, Merchnnt Tailor, Main
1 duor above Amerlcnn House. vl-iH I
tOUHI8. McrchnntTnllor unit Agent lor
DRUGS, CHEMICALS, Ac.
IAJTZ, DrugKlKt Hiul Apothecary. Mum nt.
7 Ilia H)fc VJiJi..-, y I'm
KiwM TlMiwirloti niul K inHiAr.(irli a
CLOCKS, AVAl'CIIKS, AC.
i m'liVirAltl). Wntch and Clock maker.
rttoutheiiHt corner Alain nnd Iron BlH.vllt
fZUrriNOEH, Wfttchci. Hpectaclcs &
ry Ac, MolnHtreet near west 8t, v3nl"j
BOOTS AND SIIOKS.
B
MJLLEDlSIt, Manufacturer una dealer In
iwiti imii whops. Main street, onnoslto htils-
IlllOWN, Hoot and Hhocmaker, Centro
t, rear 01 itouuini .x ion ,
) HUTZ.Uoot 'and Hlioeninlicr, Main St.,
vllartinau'a storc.went of Market, vl-l)
M
PltOFJiSSIONAL.
. H. C. HOWKK. SurBtoii Dentist, Main M.t
. VM. M. HKUKlt, Kurneun ami Phyalelnn,
-j
n. P. KINNKY. RurEton Dent t. Tcoth
Irtictctl wnnoui pain; 31Muhi., ncany up
t liplscopul Clmrcli, vl-nif
1:. ikkIjh. Aiiornev-ni-iJiw. uiuct. a
L" V3-UI
u. liAtvJvijm , iwiorm'y-ui-i.nw. uinco, m
floor lu Kxcliaugu lllw k, ucnr the "Kxclmngo
lit a.m. i;.Diuuruu ttiiu a iij niviivii.
.n.tl. al.ln AInli, ui l,..1r., 1nrlrA villi)
II. F.VANH. M. 1). 'HuriM-nii nml Ili x rlnn.
. KOUIKON.'Attornev.at.Luw. 0k Hart-
iau'h Lulldliig, MoliiHtrttt. NiMi'JO
building .Main .strti!, W-nU
li( OKI. 1111(1 BUIUUIHTY. IXCIIIIIIFM 1 1 IIICK. 111 II
.stt si. i)KHitii;KM. .Mil itinrv 11 nil i-iiiipv
t'loiiUit nml DriNH l'n t tirii knntlii imt rfininr
Ulllld WL'hltttft. VIIl4I
nijU Xl,.li.(.t hfllnro A liinplimii Ilniirii 1-1 1 1 1
HOTELS AND SALOONS.
lEKIUAX HOl'fill.bv John Lineoclc. Main
rtei.wtsioi ironklreel. vinu
.IIIIHIA lini'l.'I. In' II M nlmii, Allilll M
LEA COCK. Ovslcr and I'lntlne saloon. Amerl.
u wjsier nuioou, wnniebaieauu letau. r.x
eIllock,MuinkUett. vl-nl'J
C. MAHR. Dry Gocsls ami Notions, south.
Meat corner Main and Iron Ms. vl-nl.t
I.HEESHOLTZ.dealpr In l.r rl,.n.l. ctm.
cerles, Hoots, Shoej, Ac., comer Alain and
streets. v3-ii)
A. BF.ClvT.nY. T?not niul hlia ,tn. l..lru
4 stationery, Mnln tt., below Market. 1-u II
... . ""i-viiunerj , Groceries etc., lain
t., below Iron Vl-lll
J MKNDr.NHALL, Ocnernl Stock of Mi rehnn-
uwe ana Lumber, eoincr of Mnln Rtnet nml
a .i wrmi ....
ivliolecule ami letnll. I'ii-Iihiumi nim lr. m. ii
"un liu, iiatsrmi Cjips, Hoots uudShoes,
Jtulu st above Court House. vl-uia
J. UrtOWEH, Dry Goods, Grcrferles. etc.. cor.
oiuin si, aim couri House nuey. vl-un
, eic., cor..JIalu nnd Centro sts. vl-ul I
. QIHTON, Groceries 4 Provisions, Main
ten below Market. vl-nll
"Use. Main St., above West. vHJ
;".'-" hmu & u.,ueuierslli llty Goods,
urct'fcrll'h. Hour. I', il Unit VI. I. In.,, x.'...!1
i... ,u,, diuui uuu xtiniKei bis, vinu
, MILI.KIL ion ,i....ii.r I.. 11... ,in...i.
tlrocerles. om-i
luus, ftc, Kxehenisc mock, Mnln tt, ' vl-nli
tUAMlvH .1 A. V, HAYHUIIST, Dt alers lu
(rceerles, Coufie tlonerks and Kullnns.Kmt.
1LLIAM EllAKML'H. Confeetloneiles. Main
i., near ma railroad, vJ.ulJ
MISCELLANEOUS.
SilT5!.N' S'ltble Works, one door below
lixtOmce.Mulnhtiiet. vl-nll
9"5 ' 0)1(1 LUMllLlt CO, mnnumuurers
"niiten ers In Lumber of all kinds: I'lanlin;
Ueurilierolliond, vlnlil
0;vn:u.llue Maker, nnd Whltn and Fancy
-"urrtIMOIlOMIl, VIII 17
"C'IIMISTMAnT Saddle. Trunk A Harness
""er, Bhlve's liloeu Main Streit, vJiili)
HnillllTCU 1lrilw,r,Tnli. u,.nnt..l .l,i.f,i,i
"orthwest conier Main and Hon sts, vl-ulJ
fr lllDLKMAN, Afc-eot for Munsou's Copper
rut-utur LlBhtnliig Hod. navl
J.TIIOUNTON, W'jdl Paper, Wimlo
"M njtures, llupert bloek, Main st,
lmlow Rbndes
n.COHF.I.L. Furnltuie Hianns. three story
"'an, Main Btlen. west of Mnlkit st. vlnlJ
, I'hotoiii nplic r, ovi i Kobblns
i. oiiiht, jiiiiiii si, ii
fl-SUHN. denkrlll Meat. Tallow. ele.. Chei
"mu s alley, ui.r of Ainerlcau House, vlnll
'UN A VIIVT-M ...T.
dl.. w,nnj w vi, iiiiiiiini nun riisu
. "rellisuruluueouiiantis.llriiwer'M llolld.
, '..wiieei, M.IUJ
lf . - -
dT.v?.1-a"maNi cnuinetmnker nud Chair.
Kt't I rooms Main stuet Lei. Iron, va.ir.',
.K,'.liAlll'r'K A Co..Mttehlulsts, llnst lllootus-
..ulirL'.aeQr I Jiflr ll ll lnnlliii,u imulnnl ,l,n.i
iiacuiuery inndo and lepalied, va.nii
i,
. r' ItlnUI.KH. dealer lu nlanos. oruans and
"noili.oiis.at o. W. Coreil's furniture rooms
Vl-lilS
ViiriiV 'IW"! waiuie anu iirown riiunr
ctSl lllooinnlnirv I i-rulplc inAil. vl.t.ln
' Msu,St',''.I,'olryt,u,'Ilc,'lui'lllftu,t corner
"tniianil Markil st. vl.ull
1
ri 'if
rti
VOLUME IV NO 11.
Orangoville Directory,
I .t VI. W. COM'.MANi Merchant TnlloiHinnl
A, Oont'H rnrnUlilnsgolHlR. Main St., next tlnnr
to the llrick Hotel. vl-ti!7
I I). lIKltniNtl llIlOTIIF.rt.Carrehlcrsntid
A. lluildcrs, Main at., below l'lnc. i-nl7
nOWKIt A HUMtlNG, ilcnlcr In Dry Goods,
n Groceries. Lumber unit geticinl Meichinidlsc.
Mnlnst. i-ul7
IJIIIMC IIOTHL nllil Icfrrstitnelil Sillnoll, by
) ltolir M'Henry cor.ot Mnln nhdl'ltiosl.,vf-nl7
ilTo. A.Mr.dAIUlKUriiyflclimnnilSiirainii.
Main st., next door to Good'B Hotel l-nl7
DAVID HlillUINO. Flour and Grist MiViind
Dealer In grain, Mill Slioct. inl7
II. A C. KKLCHNF.H. lllncksmlti 1,011 Mill
Street, ucnr Fine, vl-niv
1 AM ISS 11. It AltMAN. Cabinet Mlllio:
J derMlccr. Main St., below 1'lno.
.mil Un.
vl-n 17
JM. HAltMAN, Saddle nml Harness maker.
. Muliiftt., oppslto Frame I'hmch. vniill
IOHN FKYMIiti:, Saddle nnd HarniRs
I MaluH.. above the Sunn Until,
inaUer,
VMlrf
I EWIH 11. SL'llUYM:it, Iron romwer.Madiln.
Jj 1st, una Mnnurnctuicr of plows. Mill si. vl-nl7
MH.EH A. WII.UAMH 4Co.,Tunnprsftinl Man
ufjutuiers oriiather.MIUKtne:. V1-IH7
SAMUI'.Ii HIIAltriilXH, Maker uflliulIayhurKt
Uraln Crndlo. Main Hi. 72n3.
WILLIAM DLLON'O Kli(enial:eral.'l lnannfae
turerof Ilrlek, MlllBt.,wistori'iuo vlnll
Oatawiasa.
K. DALLMAN, Mcrrlinnt Tailor, Second Ht.
llobbliiH' llulldlug. VJ-nlf
DH. J. K. IIOHTMNH. Burgpnn sml PiiyHlclan
Hteuml St., below Main. v'J-ulS
GIXjIIKUT A JCLINK, dry gootlfl, Kior,'iioH, niul
geuenil nicrclmnrilM.', Main Htn-ct v'J-nl2
I II. KISTLKK, "Cnllawlsda Honice,'
, Corner Mntn anil Hernnd Streets.
North
v;uis
L.
KKII.l'.It, llllliiiil Halonn, OyhtiT, nn Ico
C'icnm In neuson MulnHt. '2nV2
M. IJUOIIMT. UfttlHT In Oencrnl Mfichnndlio
, Dry UmulK, Clmcerlef Arc, v2-ulS
Ci UK (i II K II A N N A r Ilrlck Hotel, S. Ko-itcn.
n bHinler rmrrlctor.soiith'Cnsttornt'rMRlniinil
Hucoiul Btrcut. vul2
I). ltlNAHD, dialer In Stoles and
Mnln Street.
rln.wtire,
vSnli
M. li. AI1UOTT, Atloiniy at law, Main St.
VJ11 '.2
Light Street.
I II. IKVI.VM, Medical Stoic Main Street and
A" llrlorcicok Itoud. v3nl'J
V. OJIAN & Co., Wheelwright, first door
above School lloui.c. vlnlll
JOHN A.OMAN, Miuiur.icturer and dealer In
Hoots and Shouj, vlnld
T J. LlilSElt.M. I).. KurKeon and Pliyslclun.
Olllce at Keller's Holer. Min'.-?
1)i:TKIt KST. dealer In Dry Goods Groceries,
Hour, hied, Salt, Flub, lrun, Nails, etc., Main
Street. vlnl5
RH. KNT, deale
ail Its bianthe
deater In Stoves ami Tin waru In
VllllU
Espy.
F. Hi:iUIlAi:i,A imo.,(letil(r In Dry CJoods,
Orofi-rk-N, anil tineiul ML-rehandUt'. vl'ull
IVl'iuiirk'tor. ' ...... vZn)j
IlUllV U'PI M l'TllIIMVn MIT T CJ I' U 1
f D. WKUKIIi:iHi:n,riootniulShnKtoroanil
mamilactury. Shop on Main Ktrcut tp-
fp W. KDCIAH.StiMiuuhftunu Planlnu Mill niul
! llox Maunfiictoiy. v'Jnll
Buck Horn.
XI G. it V, H. SIIOKMAKllIt, dealers In drj
111 . Koods, i;roceiles and Kinernl meieliaudlse.
Flr.t stole In south end ot town. M!.nls
Business Cards.
Jl. L'VELLE,
A1TOI1NKY AT L.Y,
Ashlaml, Schuylkill County Pit.
M.
n
W. JIILLEU,
ATTOltNUY AT
Oftlee Court House Alley, below the C'oi.itM-
niAN Oltlie. Uouutles. llaik-Pay and Pensions
collected. llloomsbuii; Pa. scp.'Al'u?
ROBERT V. CLAKK,
A I iljl.is I'.i ,V1 liilVi ,
Olllce Main Street below tho Couit Hollhe.
llloomsburii Peiin'n.
J II. LITTLE,
AliUliabl ATJiAW,
OitlCH Ciuit-lIoue Alley, below the CoLUM-
iiian Olllce, Illoouisburi: l'n.
c.
UROCKWAY,
ATTOltNUY AT LAW,
llLOOUSllUUrj, A.
m-Oinre- CVuit
House APey, lu tho Co
Jan I,'b7.
IA'MllIAN tilllldlllH.
T7 J. TIIOR
All woiiltlunuo
huri! nnd vicinity,
IIORN'JON
uoiiuceto thccltuuisol lllooms.
lv. thnt in tins Just rieelved a lull
nnd couipleto uisoitment oi
WALL PAPLH, WINDOW BIIADIA
trlXTUllKH, COllllS, TASSKIJI,
mih1i.1I other coods lu his llueof busiiicsi;. All
Iho newest nud most appi oved patterns of the
day aie always to be found lu his istablUlimcnt.
innr.o, eun .mnu ni. uhiuh iiiinti.
J B. BUBS Kb,
M A N U I- A CI U 1 1 E 1 1 ,
aud dealer lu
CAUl'irr-IlAOH, VALISES, ri.Y-NKlH,
UUFKAI.O Iioniri, JIOKSK-llI.AMiI.Th Al'.,
which hu feels citnlldeiit he can hell at lowei
rate than any other perhon In the county. Kat
stin 1 list fur viiiirhflvt-H.
hlioj) 1 nil ti uoor dciow u.e uouri iioube, niiii
biieui, inooiuvuuiK, ru,
uov. io, u.
g E N T F R E E 1
ji, w iiii.n, pu.i x r-
SEED CATALOGUE
And nuiHK to tho
FLOWIUt nud VHOIITAIILI!
Garden, For 1870.
Piihlished 111 January, llviry lover of flowers
wishing this new nud Miluablo work, frei id
charge, should mhlriss Immediately M. O'Ktefe
sou & Co., bllwnnger A llairj 'a lilockltoeheter(
l inc. n, uveui
n I M 1' L 13 K.
The understand will eheirfullv iiuill o-UKiti lo
nil who wish it the Iteclpe nml lull dlieeilons
or piepnnug nun using n simple uuu iiiauiiiui
Vicetnblo llalm. Hint vv 111 liomidlalely lemose
Inn. Viiekles. Plmnles. lllotches. nnd all emo
tions uun liupuruilh oi i lie rain. leaving l lie same
soft, clear, .month uud btiiutlful.
Ue will uUo send (hiki) lisli net Ions for pro
ducing by veiysl niple meiius.ii liixuriiiiit growth
of lialr vii n biildlituil or smooth hue In lis. thun
thirty ilajs Irom llrst appllcnliou,
'Hid nlrtiveciinbeobtnlned by return mnll b)
adilllislug 1 IIH. 1'. I'lIAPilAN, ( hi mist.
P. t). llox Siai, IU5 lrouday, New Yokr.
An.', 0,'oiMy. f
DOWDER KEGB AND LUMlllCR,
W, M, monhoi: & CO.,
llupert, l'a.,
Manufuoturers of
V0WDF.K KKUH,
iilid dealrrs In all kinds of
LUMIiKU,
Ulvs notice thnt they are prepared Ui ucconjodnt
their cuttom with dispatch, aud on Ibecheapei
erms.
Philadelphia Directory.
Major 11. AUTMAN C. II. lllt.tl.VaRlt. M, MOHV
llTMAN, UIliLINOEK A CO.,
NO. 101 NOItTII THIIID HT. I'lIlLADBM'lIIA,
Two doors above Arch, formerly
Asut'ALTUiii:if) ami Jommns is
CAHlT.Tft, COllONH, YAItNS, 11ATTINO,
OIL CLOTHS, UAHPKT CHAINS, COltDAOK,
OIL SIIADIM, GRAIN MAGS, Till YAUN,
WtCIC YAIIS, WINDOW I'Al'J'.K, COVM1I.KTS,
ALSO,
ll7..Oir ,tA' VOODUX waiu:
IliuiouH.niu'i.iiKH.T.noKiNn ru.AssiJi.TnUNK'i.
fe h. 0,'CJ.
JAULH HOTEL.
'4 '4 J No K1 1 1 T 1 1 1 1 1 S r K K l.T,
It. 1). CUMMINGS, l'ltoi'iumoit.
JSTAIiLLSllEO ms
JOIIDAN AllltOl'HKll.
Wholesale Grocers, nud Dealers In
BALTPKTIli: AND HUIMSrONi;
NoUIUNoith ltdrdSt.
Philadelphia.
G.
W. HIjAIION A CO.,
Mnnurnctuters 01
OIL CLOTHS AND WINDOW M..ADUM,
Wnrehouso, No. 121 Nurth Thlid l-treot
Phtlndeliihla.
Q.HmtOEII. KOHEKTrii
Importer and Denier In
HAHDWAHU, CUTLllltY, GUNS, Ac.
No. 311 North 'lhlrd Sticet, above Vine
Philadelphia.
C. It. HOKNK. W. S. KI.Mt. J. 11. SI.V11IIIIT,
OKNE. KINO A SEYBEKT,
WlIOLLSALi: DllY GOODS.
No. 121 MarltitSticct
PIIILADLLPIIIA.
Ordcis lllled promptly at lowest pi lee".
Jauuary 11, 1WH.
TT W. HANK'S
W1101.i:SALK TOllACCO, SNUFF, AND
CIGAIl WA11KIIOUSK,
No. 1 Ii! North Third Street,
Ititween Cherry and Itace. wcbtsltle,
Philadelphia.
J II. WALTEK,"
Lato Waltel ,t: Kaub,
Importer and Dealer lu
CHINA. QLAS8, AND QUEKN8WAHK.
No. 231 N.Thlid street,
Phllidi'tilila.
KEl'HEAUT,
WITH
I5AKNES, liKO. A IIERKON,
HATS, CAl'd, BTHA W GOODS A KUIIS,
No f 0 i Market Street,
(Above Fifth,)
PllII.AUKI.riUA.
JOHN STItOUP & CO.,
.Successors to Ktroup &, brother,
whom:saia': dkai.kuh in Kitii.
No. '21 Noith WhancH nud '2o Notth Third St
ihlhulotphla.
ICIIAKLSON L. WKIOUT, JK.
ATTOHNl'.Y AT LAW,
NO. liS SOUTH SIXTH STUICIIT.
I'l!OI.AIIKI.l'lllA.
ncl.2!,'CD-ly
gNYDEK, I1A1UUS A liASSETT,
MauufneturerH anil Jobbeisof
MllN'B AND HOYS' CLOTHING,
Nos. 5'Jj Miuket, and 5J--Coiniutri Street.
Philadelphia.
"YyiLLIAM FISH Ell
with
THOMAS C A 11 H O N A v
wnol.i:s.u.l:
DEALEUS IN HOSIERY,
MEN'S FUI1N1SIIING GOODS,
L1NKNH A NOTIONS,
NO. IS NOUTH kOUUTH STllbKT
I'lillntlolphln.
Juue 4,'(i'J.Cm
"yyARTJIAN A ENGELJIAN,
iuiii:L.u,i-uri' A hi'.uau
MANUFACTOHY,
No. 313 .noiith nn no siiu i t
Second Door below Wood
PHILADF.LPIIIA.
J. W.Waktmas. P. K?UK1.MAN,
"7"AINWKiaHT A CO.,
uui,r.nAi,i. uiiui.i-.iin,
N. 11. Corner Second nml Arch Btieets,
Phii.aiiki.I'IIIa
Dcnlcis lu
TL'AH, HYltUl'H, COFFKK, BUGAIt, MOLAHHK
ltli'K, Hl'IC'KS, 111 CA11II SODA, AC, AC.
S-Orders will ice Ive prompt attenttoiii
may l(i,CT-tf.
Hotels.
Ii U 51 II J A II O T E L
H v
ISF.llNAUIl STOHNUlt.
llavlui: lately run band uid llttid up tli
Moll known ltoblsou Hotel l'ropeTly, loomed
fi,w noons aiiovi: ntK i-oriiT novsi:.
on tli. Kiiitui side of tho stint. In thu town
liloouisLuru; and luiMUi;oiiiniutu a iiceusu lor
the same as a
HOTF.L AND H1T.UANT,
the l'n pi let or hnsdetl mil lied to nlv e to the pt
pie isiiin inn itiiiiiuu oiiMiiiss or picuaure
A LllTLK MOIU-: KOO.M.
His stnblltiKtiUo Is (Xtinsle,nnd Is tilted up
to ut bueults nnd ennhigts in the dry. Hu
promises lliul everjlhluu aLoul his estnblUh
uieiit siiull be coniliiittd lu all ordi rly nnd law,
fill mnuuer; and ho tesptcttuliy soliclis a share
ol Hie public pnlrunuuc. uiyn'bT.tf
T
IIE ESPY HOTEL.
KSPY, COLUMIIIA COUNTY, I'A.
The undersigned would Inform the travelling
public Hint h has taken tho above named estnb.
Ilshuii lit and thoroughly retltted the same for
the pelfccl coinenleucuof hlsgllests. III. larder
will be stocked Midi tho best llio market uttords.
Tlie choicest liquors, wines nud clgins always lo
be found 111 Ills bill',
WILLIAM PF.TTIT.
Apr.SI.IA.ir Kspy. I'll.
JRU'K HOTEL,
OIlA.S'GKVII.I.i:, COLUMIIIA COU.S I V, PA.
ROI1R M'HENRY, Proprieior.
This well known House, having been put In
tl.oiouh repair, Is now open lu the liiuelllug
public, 'Hie bur Is stocked uilh the choicest
Illinois ami elents.nnd the table will be. nt nil
tiluis, supplied is till the delicacies of the season.
No pains will be spurt d lo Insure the com lot lot
tim-sii,.
uraugev iiie, nee. iivu'ju.
P O R K S 11 O T E L,
III.OOMSI1UUG, COLUMIIIA COUNTY, I'A.
Tim undersigned has taken Ihls well known
House, lately neeupUil by Georga W. Mauger,
ami has put It In thorough repair wllh eutliely
new hi nil I u re, Ac. lively intention will be paid
to the comfort and convenience or uuests. 'Hie
bar alHti)N supplied with llio lu st of liquors uud
cigars. T, 1I1-1NT. TA YLOK.
liHirH'7D-3iii,
BUSINESS CARDS,
VlHlTI.S'a CAllDS,
LL'ITLK IIHADS,
HILL HllADS,
PKOOHAMMKH,
P0STK1W,
iU., AC,
Neatly and Cheaply Printed
From the Latest HtylcscifType at the.
COI.UM1IIAN OFFICh
BLOOMSBU11G. PA., FRIDAY, AP1UL 8, 1870.
Qjhoicf Poetry
Tho Ilottso that Jack Built.
Ik-holtl tho Mansion ro.ucJ by dipilal Jack,
Hco thu inaltfitorol In many n plethoric Hack,
In Iho pioud clrqnuof Iv.tu'n blvo lac,
Maik ho7 Iho lat'a foloiilnui finjri Invu lo
Tho KoMcn Htaroi In JoIhi'm pivtlt m lat1.
Anon with velvet f.tot ami Tanuiln Htrliles.
Subtile Ortnmlkln lo his quarry ijllilos j
urunaiKin Rriin, wno Mo.v the florco rotluttt,
WIioro tooth InaMomiK Johiiuir mckcloth
rent I
iil now, the tleep-inuuthed immIho roo'naisiiuH,
That Vexed thn avenger of tho Mnlon unit,
8lored In the hallowed preolncHuf that Imll
Thnt ro-o completu at Jack'n creative cull.
cru utalkstho Itiipetuom cow with rrumplod
norn,
Whereon tho oxarerballtijs houn 1 was torn,
ho b.tyed tho f)Uuol uuhler bout tint slow
Tho rat pred vcwmi. whom Icuen f.ti' r.n
thronuh
The iextllo (lbre.s that InvotvisU tho Kialu
That lay lu Hans' InvlnUtnilomnln,
Here Wrtlks Iho forlorn danucl erowuod wllh
rue,
lactlleroiiH spolU froiu vaeetno nun who draw.
Of that eorulouUta beast, whoio tortuom born
Tossed to tho cloudy In ileriia, vindictive (j )rn,
ho uayliiK hound, whoie braiii;.irt h irl; and .stir
Arched tlia lltlio spina and roared tho Indignant
fur
Of lwt that with vermlnlcldut claw
Htrutk tho weird rat, In whoso lniatlnto in
iy rocking unit that orst In Juan'iteourt wo
Haw.
Itnhed lu n'lusiM iit garli that necms, In tooth,
Too hmz a p'ey to Chronos Iron tooth,
Heboid tho man, whoo amoroni lips Incline
nil or young Kros oscu!utivn I5n,
olho lorn mntdrii whiso lact-alblo hainU,
Drew nlba-lactlo wcilth trom Uctcal glands
)f that Immortitl bovine, by wIhhu horn
Distort, to icahiiH ethereal wan borne,
ho beast ealulcan, vexerof thaltdy
Ulji"iC rpiadrupcdal, who made die
The old mordaccous rat, lint dared duvoui
nturodauootu malt In John's it iiuo-ith bower.
o, here, with hlrsuto hoaors dod'jj, .suctrluit,
Of H.ipontcoo.is look J, tho prlost who Unko 1
n Hymeu'H golden band tho wlyht un thrift
Vho4omoaiiKexlgtioiH btarcd from many a ri It,
Acn as ho kissel tho virgin all forlorn,
Who mllkod the cow with Implicated horn,
Who lu leroo wrath theeiulno torturer skied,
Ih it darcil to vox tho Insidious murlcldu,
Who let auroral ellluenea through the pelt
OfthntMly rat tint lobbed tho place that Jack
built.
The loud cantankerous Mianghao comes at last.
Whoso shouts aroused tho shorn cccleslast.
Who scaled the vows of Hymen's sacrament;
To him who robed In garments Indigent,
Inosculates tho damsel lachrymose,
The emulator of tho horned brute morose,
Thattosiod tho ilog:, that worried tho cat, that
hilt
The rat that atn IIih malt that lay In the hoae
that Jack built.
On tho Approach of Spring,
touxii os a i.Awvrn's nijiK.
Whcrens on reitnln boiiKhs nudsprnys
Now divers birds are heard to slug.
And sundry tloweis their heads upialsc,
Now therefore hall thou coming spiinir.
Tin) songs of those snld birds nrouie
The memory of our youthful hours,
As green as thoso snld sprnys and bought,
As fresh and sweet as those sild Mowers.
Tho blrdt uforesaid, hapy pairs,
Lovo, 'mid the aforesaid boughs, enshrlue-i
In freehold nests, themselves, tlislr heirs,
Aduiliilstiators nud nsslgns.
Oh, busiest term of Cupid's couit,
When tender plnlntltrs ncllon brlnr.
Season of frolleaudof sport,
Unit as nfoiesald, coming Bpilng.
rStiiiiCiiliinroufi.
(IUU FARM OF TEN AttltUS.
Wi: lived once ill the city. Wo had
a pretty, couvi nient house, ami were
thoroughly comfortable, until sumu
evll-ilispo.sed person lent to our mother
a copy of "Ten Acres Enough," which
gave her an agricultural fuver,resulting
lu a determination to ell or rent our
beautiful city homo and buy a ten-acre
farm In the country.
Wo argued and entreated. It was of
no uvail. Go we must; and go we did;
and before tho house was furnished at
thnt.
Wo arrived at our estate ouo chilly
day lu April. Far-.ieelng mamma had
previously sent Frank out with direc
tions to "procure servants anil have tho
houso warm ami comfortable." Rut
such extravagances as servants wero
not to be had in the region where we
weie toboltle, for lovo or money, and so
alter a day spent In fruitless attempts
on his part to conjure up one, Frank
slurted for tho city, just as wo loft it.
As a matter of course, ho carried tho
door-key in his po-ket, and as mamma
had taken pains that the house bhould
bo burglar-proof, wo could not possibly
gain admittance. Wo stood upon the
piazza, shivering and shaking like Har
ry GUI of old, when our attention was
suddenly attracted to tho street, where
we t-aw a mo.-t diverting spectacle a
cow driving a man. I suppose, how
ever.that when they started upon their
peregrinations tho ortler of their line of
nirrcli was reversed. What a lively,
playful cow it was! Tho man preceded
her by eight or ton yards, with a ropo
lu his baud, one cud of which was at
taehed to tho cow a horns. IIu was
coming toward us at u rapid rate, and
tho "sweet crenturo" In Ills wako was
tossing her head up antl down, and tf.v
reerlng at full tilt after him. Tho man
brought forcibly to mind Artemus
Wnrd's description of thu "Oallaut nd
viinco of the Federal troops towards
Washington" alter thu flr.it Hull Run
battle. Man and cow turned lu our
vii rd.
"(ih, mamuiit!" I expostulated, in
terror, "tell him to tako her right out.
What has ho brought that dreadfulcrea
turn here for','"
Rut before our mother could speak,
tho mint announced, "hero's yer cow,
ma'am."
"My cow?" Maminii turned pale.
"Yes, ma'am."
"Hut I said she was to hugentlo," fill
tered mamma.
"So sho Is," replied that false-hearted
one, "as genllu and playful us a lamb."
Anil ho dodged around a treoas the cow
made a precipitate rush at him.
"Shall I leavo her here, ma'am V" ho
panted.
"Oli, nol" wo nil exclaimed In chor
un: and mother ordered him to tako her
to the haru, uud put her in thu stall, if
ho euuhl.
1 wish emphatically that "lliut was
all," llku tho rliymo In Mutliur Gousu
but It wasn't by any means. They had
Just disappeared from sight, when wo
heard a fearful shriek, and behold the
innn spin tlirouuh llio nlr, nnd como
crnslilnf? down tlirotifjli n codnr tree.
i'lio cow, "Kcntlo ni a lnnib," had toss
ed lilm, mid tho toss nnd tumble litul
brolfcn Ills let'. Wo were In n jilcasant
picdlcftinont, trfilyl The liouso locked
lip; no train from Roston fur two hours:
it cross cow nt law; man with a brolc
en Ipk to tako cart) of; and three help.
leys leiinilcs in distress. Tho ton nercs
were a little beyond enough Just at that
period.
Jleanwhllo tho cow was r.iiiip:int,"Oh,
jratid," exclaimed Rose; 'holla 1 I'm
sure I heard n innn whistle."
clear, melodious litcnturo from
"Der I'lehehutz" sounddl up from the
road.
Holla 1 holla I" I fccreained; "help!
helpl" and nyi)iin' man turned In at
the avenue, and stood looking nt us.
"Oh 1 do come here, sir!" we called lu
chorus tiualii. "Oh ! do catch our cowl"
for hhe appeared to bo ruminating
which of us should have tho next toss.
Thoyounu man sprang over tho hedge
and mother directed his attention to
the vendor of cows, who lay limenslblo
upon tho grass, thoroughly cowed.
"If one of you will step over to my
place, the next on the right, there are
two men wliocan come up and remove
Iiim," said the stranger, after examin
ing the broken leg in a professional way
which at once proclaimed that hu was
a doctor.
"Roslo, will you go?" asked mother,
Ilosio looked askanco nt tho cow, but
undertook tho errand. Thu stranger
held tho galo open for her to pass out,
saying: "Tull them Dr. Murrav sent
you. Michael and John aro to bring
up a cart with n mattress."
Then Dr. Murray advanced towards
tho cow, who, seeing ho was not afraid
of her, immediately grow submissive,
After sho was properly secured, and
the poor sufferer's broken limb bound
up with n splint, mother explained our
unfortunate situation to Dr. Murray,
who immediately proposed to us to
mako his houso our homo until our own
was habitable.
Mother demurred, but ho insisted,
and so it came to pass that when the in
jured man was sent homo in tho cart
Roslo had been dispatched for, wo nil
started en route for Dr. Murray's.
Mother explained her grievances.
"You see, sir, all this was so unex
pected. I ordered our furniture from
Wuro's last week, and 'twas to havo
been delivered Monday. And I told
Frank lo be surennd eugagea couple of
servants directly, and have tho liouso
ready for us. Then that dreadful cow I
why, sir, tho man declared that she was
perfectly gentle. I can't imagine where
Frank Is, either."
Tho doctor assured her that thu cow
would bo gentto enough if her calf wero
with her,and advhedils being sent for;
explained how impossible 'twas to ob
tain servants in tho country; suggested
that Frank had gone to town lo procure
them; condoled with her over tho non
appearance of the furniture; and, as by
that time wo had reached his house,
ushered us Into his warm, cheerful par
lor, anil begged us to remove our out
side garments ami make ourselves thor
oughjy comfortable, while lie went to
set the cow driver's broken lea,
nr. .Murray's parlor wasa very inter
esting study. The room itself, long and
wide, with a multiplicity of alcoves
und niches, and long, deep windows,
opening upon thu verandah and lawn,
was delightful. And then everything
was In keeping. Light straw matting
covered tho floor; tho furniture was cov
ered with limit vo linen, and every nr
tide of it suggested comfort. Theio
was uu open lire lu front of which, on a
bright-colored rug, lay stretched out ifi
mmense St. Rermird dog, who greeted
us in a dignified maimer, and then re
timed to his comfortable quarters.
Hut tho walks, thealcoves and deep
windows! theio lay the charm that held
Rosie autl me speechless with delight,
Pictures, statues and flowers; oil paint'
ings, engravings, water sketches; every
variety of plctiii'o,and all of them gems
of art; statues in bronze, inarblo nnd
plaster, a collection that must havo
icon gathered from all parts of tho
world, with infinite taste and apprccia
turn. Ami me nowors: well, if you
had heard Resin's prolonged exultant
"Oh, how splendid !" you would havo
known what they wero to us.
There wero several deep rccessOs till.
ed with book-shelves, and as no inhos
pitnblo glnss doors, polished and locked
up, guarded the ti'ea.siires,they wero ac
tcesible. A piano, little and guitar
showed i-onichudy was musical; and
strewn around tho room wero beautiful
foreign nickiincks, bits of marvel from
all the points of the compass, and a
huge pile of photographic' views from
foreign purl
Wo concluded that Dr. Murray was a
genius, and must havo spent most of
his time In travelling. We said as mud
to him when he returned.
'Oh, no," said ho ; "I havo travelled
a little, hut ihtfeu are Philip's. He's
L'reat traveller."
wo remained hi tno iioutu until iaio
in tho iifternot n, when Frank returned
from Huston with two servants, uud at
the Mime time threu loaiU of furnlturu
arrived for us from Ware's.
For some days It stormed heavily,
giving us an excellent opportunity to
make our now homo habitable.
Mntluir had let tho liou-.u lu town,
with tho furnlturu and carpets, ami our
now homo had been carpeteil, curtiiitiod
and newly furnished throughout. As
thu e.irpets wero all down, thu curtains
all up and tho furniture nil new, it
didn't tako in long to "settle." And
(hu shining of lliu miii upon our fourth
day was hailed with delight.
Wo began out fanning operations.
Acting upon lliu doctor's suggestion,
mother had sent ouo of his men for tho
calf, ami after breakfast Fitiiik Invited
us alt lulu the barn to sue it.
"Poor little creaturo I" sild Frank,
"he's been standing ntlll hero for threu
whole days; I guess I'll tnku him out,
uud exerclsuhim a little."
"liuturen't calves very strong?" sug
gested Roslo,
Frank laughed scornfully.
"As If I couldn't hold a e-df!" And
ho proceeded to untlo her ami led her
j out.
COL.
Then such n scenu I The moment tho
calf felt tho soft grass under her feet,
away sho wont over hill, dale, brush
and briar, dragging poor exhausted
Frank after her, and causing him to
practice gyiunnstlc3 In n most ludicrous
way.
1 never had Imagined that my broth
er possessed such nn nptltudu, for sur
mounting obstacle?; bugo bushes wero
tnkon uta Hying leap, stono walls prov
ed no Impediment trees wero dexter
ously dodged, and no French dancing
master ever exhibited a greater variety
of steps than Frank's elastic limbs ac
complished, to say nothing of thu calf's.
Finally thu interesting performance
was wound up, literally and figurative
ly, by tho ealfs's dodging behind a tree,
ami then around and around It, ending
Hug tho rope so us to bring himself to a
standstill, and Frank, suddenly, Into a
horizontal position, thereby causing
him lo Imagine that tho ground had
Mown up and hit bun on tho head.
Dr. Murray's factotum, Michael, who
had been leaning over tho fence,hugoly
enjoying tho wholo scone, now camo
forward ami offered his services. With
his assistance, thu calf was soon lodged
safely in tno barn, and Frank was tak'
en in hand by tender-hearted mamma
who, fearing that, llko Jack in tho
story book, ho had broken his crown
treated him as D.imo Hill did her son
lo a plaster of "vinegar and brown
paper."
Jut as the operation was completed
thu expressman reined up his horses
before our door, ami, alighting, lifted n
great box Irom his carl, which ho de
posited in our front entry.
"What is this, mamma V" we incpilr
ed, eagerly clustering around It.
"Seeds, my deals, for tho vegetabl
and flower gardens."
"Oh! you darling!" said Rosie, giv
ing her a hug, and then dancing off for
n hammer.
Hut Frank was beforo her, and com
ng up witli a hatchet, soon had the box
open.
A variety of parcels, large and small
all numbered, greeted our eager sight
as wueach plunged In a hand to inspect
their contents.
"What is this, mamma?"
"And tills?"
"And this?"
Mamma looked wondrously wise, as,
taking tho first package, she looked first
into it, nnd then around it, nnd finally,
after a second inner inspection, ventur
ed the suggestion :
"I think tlieso nro squash seeds."
"Oh, mamma!" I exclaimed, "I
know they are not squash seeds; they
nro threo times as small."
"Perhaps they are eantelopes," sug
gested Frank.
"No, they nro cucumbers," declared
Rosie
"Are you sure, my dtnr?" asked
mamma, meekly.
Rosie replied that sho was, mid label
led the package neatly.
"Now, what aro theso?" said Frank,
holding up for Inspection a very bulky
package.
"Onions I" exclaimed mamma, tri
umphantly.
uut," taid I, douiiiingiy, "they do
not smell nt all; Rode, do you think
they aie onions."
"Maud Leigh," cried my sister. "I am
heartily ashamed of you. Onions, in
deed! they are bulbs for thu flower
garden -hyacinthe, narcissus, crocus,
etc.; but they might its well bo tiro
crackers, for all tho use wo can make of
them now ; they cannot bo planted un
til next fall. Don't you know, mamma,
that only gladiolus bulbs and a few of
the lilies aro suitable for lato spring
planting?"
"Stop your lecture on botany, Rosie,
Posle, and tell us what is this;" and
Frank held up a bag of something.
Roslo took it, looked nt it, sniffed at
it, and, making a very dubious face at
It, avowed that tlio contents wcro"noth
ing but sawdust In huge grains."
"Anil hero aro two moro bags filled
with tlie Mimu!" Frank cried, indig
nantly. "It's a shame, mamma," we vehem
ently sympathized.
Frank's declaration, that tho seed
dealer was a "rascal," was interrupted
by a knock upon our front door.
Our visitor was Dr. Murray.
"Good morning," ho said pleasantly,
us lie entered the hall, and then glan
cing at tlie array of packages, ho remark
ed:
"You aie making extensivo garden
preparations I see."
"1 sliouid think so," answered mam
ma, n littlo milled ; "the seednian has
bent methree bags of sawdust."
"Sawdust! my dear madam, thcro
must bo some mistake."
".ico for yourself 1" cried Frank, toss
ing him tho despised parcels, at the
contents of which tho doctor merely
glanced, and then, with a not wholly
suppressed binile, named them mangold
wurzel and beet seeds,
"Thero must bo a catalogue," said he,
"aceompanyiug thu packages, and in It
corresponding numbers to those on tho
wrapper will glvo us their names."
"An instantaneous search produced
tho e italogue. Wo consulted It eagerly,
anil Roslo wrote tho names, as tho dif
ferent packages wero identified, upon
their wrappers, with frequent interjec
tions and remarks in parentheses.
"No. 10, Mignonette, ah ! that Is nice!
10, Turnips, bah! 1 1, Sweet Peas, mag-
nlllceut! ll, Carnations, splendid!' etc,,'
finally going olfln a (hitler of delight,
with her apron eoqiielllslily drawn up
and lllled with a prospective crop of
flowirs, her hair very picturesquely
disarranged, and her sweet voice warn
HK. "Wu aro lliu ilowers, bright, sweet tlotters;
Oilsnrlug woof sunny hums."
Ami not unlikoa bright, sweet flower,
herself, wa-. our pretty Rosie.
Meanwhile, Dr. Murray remained
patiently by mamma's side, advising,
explaining, and giving all tho general
liifiirmatlou requisite for an amateur
gardener; seemingly duvotod to mam
ma's interests, but really concerned In
liUowu and Roslu's, if frequent stealthy
glances In tho direction which she had
departed, aud a Hush of pleasure at her
return, might bo taken as Indications of
thu same.
1 .i
I
1
1
DEM. - VOL.
SO.'
When tho hist packngo was liilcen out!
rank removed tho box. The doctor
remarked persuasively to mamma: "1 1
camo over, Airs. Leigh, hoping to be
able to luvelghi your young folks into
akliiga horsnback rldo with me."
"Hurrah I" shouted Fr nk, returning;
'what toy you, girls?"
" es, yes, by all means, If mamma Is
willing;" anil dear mamma, not liking
to &poll our pleasure, gave her consent.
Dr. .Murray was determined that no
obstnelo should stand In our way, nnd
oven when Frank suggested tho rather
alarming ono thai wo had no horses, he
waived It aside, declaring dial "Phil."
always kept a cotiplu of sadille borses,
nnd hu had two of his own.
Isn't busplendtd?" whispered Roslo
n my ear, as wo donned our habits.
'I full Just like giving him a hug, and
ailing him a darling!"
Which announcement would have
irobably pleased the doctor as much as
R horrified me.
That was n glorious ridel I wish I
could fully describe It, but have only
time lo rcrnurlc that thu doctor and
Rosie were mutually Interested In each
other, and Frank nnd I wero left to our
own resources a good de.il of tho time.
On our homeward routo wo took the
postolllco road,and Dr. Murray brought
to us, with his own letters, ono to me,
post-marked "Paris-," and forwarded
from Huston. Ho bunded mo the letter
with an air of surprise, which greatly
augmented the Hush which pleasuro and
embarrassment had sent to my face.
"Why, Maudle, that is from Allston,"
Frank hoodlesMy remarked; "and I
brought you two last week. V ell, lie
is devoted."
"Ho still, Frank," tald Rosie; "come
hero ami arrange this girth for me; it Is
loose."
"Allow me," exclaimed Dr. Murray,
starling forward.
A caieloss motion of Ids hand throw
his letters to tho ground, and tlioro
among them lay ono In Philip Allston's
own handwriting, nnd nddrcssed to Dr.
John Murray Allston." Philip's bioth
cr, I knew; but what had our Dr. Mur
ray to do with them?
Then It flashed upon me.
Hoforewowere engaged Philip iiad
told mo that he nnd bis brother had
lived from boyhood witli their uncle,
Dr. John Allston, and all being now
physicians, they wero known In their
native plnco as Dr. Allston, Dr. Philip
and Dr. Murrny.
I laughed to myself nt his surprise
when I should write to him that wo
wero his next-door neighbors at home.
Anil I would not tell Dr. Murray for
n while yet.
Hut Rosio spoiled that part of my
plan, for when Dr. Murray rode besldo
her again ho said:
"So your sister knows Phil.?"
"Dr. Allston?" inquired itosie. "Oh,
yes ! they are engaged."
"Indeed!" exclaimed Dr. .Murray,
with n smile of pleasure. "Shall I tell
you, Miss Leigh,howl have heard your
sister described? As ,
" 'My Maud Innll her glory,
Foiovernud ever mine I
Queen lose of the rosebud gulden of glib -Queen
Lily and Itoss lu one!' ele."
"I thought your sister beautiful, and
wished Phil, had rrcon her, beforo en
gaging himself to nn English Maud, for
he wrote me that ho was made happy
in London."
"Yes," said Rosie; "Maud was visit
ing there. Hut how canto you to know
Philip Allston so well?"
"Simply because ho is my brother,"
replied tho doctor.
How About Elijah?
A Methodist minister was traveling,
through tho west of Illinois twenty
years ago. Illinois was a wild placo
then. Ho traveled twenty miles 0110
daj before coming to n farm house.
Hut there bo was received with hos
pllallty. Chicken pot-pie and corn
dodgers composed his supper; but to a
hungry man these aro m good as a
stuffed turkey.
Thu fine old grandmother of thu Iioibo
was most profuse in her hospitality
Sho pressed tho pot-pie on the holy
man's pinto till ho could eat no more.
And then, when tho family was gath
ered around tho great log chiintioy and
Its blazing (Ire, (ho venerable daino
opened her mouth, and then spake:
"Ah, well-a day! it's 11 great comfort
to havo a minister ofthoGospel inthcso
parts. IPs twenty years agono now
sinco I havo seen ouoof 'em. I've been
a readlii o' my Hiblo all that time, and
a waltln' to see a minister to ax him a
question about suthn' I don't rightly
understand."
"Madam," answered tho curious
minister, "I am so tired with my long
rldo that I could not enter Intou serious
question till I havo slept; but if you
will ask mo to-monow morning, beforo
I bet out, I will answer it to tho best of
my ability."
The old lady expressed herself satis
fied, and tho canning minister secured a
soft couch for the night. Tho noxt
morning grandma was up early, and
hard at work frying slapjacks for tho
minister's breakfast. This last being
despatched, tho old lady was still in
a nervous (ldget about her question,
whilo tho holy man's horsu wassaddlcd
and brought to tho door.
After adjusting his saddlo bag.s nnd
shaking hands with nil tho family, he
mounted hU horse, and turning lo liiir
asked:
' Antl now, Madam, what is your
question?"
"Waal, minister," said she, "yer
know how it sou in tho lllblu, that nrter
Elijah was made 11 propliotl,thi httiveiis
opened and Elijah was taken up lo
heaven In a chariot and horsiM ' fire.
It's better nor twouty year sin' 1 llrht
seed that in tho Rlble, and 1 havo puz
zled over It over since; an' thero ain't a
soul ruitn' theso dlgtjlus knows uny
moro nor 1. Hut you're a mlnlstor of
thu Gospel, 1111' ought to know all them
things. Now what I want to know is
this: Did thu Lord take up Elijah right
slick to heaven, or did ho go klnde
slttntuntllclar?" History lias not recorded llio minis
ter'd reply, Onward.
. XXXIV -
HATKS OF AOVFiltTIBlNO.
One so,urrc,(Un lint. orlU equivalent In Noo.
pnrcll typo) on or two Insertion., II.Mt thr.t
lnsertloii.,2.k. ( . , r , . ,i "jT
Onc.quare I2.W tJ.OQ 11,00 18,00 I10,t
Twonquaic S,50 6,00 7, CO 9,U0 li,M
Thriiojquarcf.KS.W 7,00 e.oo 12,00 .ll.ft
Foui qaarcIii..7 00 9,00 ij 11,00 t17,MYatoo
Quarter column.. 10,00 12,00 14,00 20,30 '&J
Half column.. 13,00 11,00 M00 90,00 60,0
Olio column -.30,00 .110,60 , 10,00 GO00 100,09
Executor's or Administrator's Notice, tl0 t
Auditor or Assignee'. Notice,
Local notliW, twenty cents ft Hhe; by tlieyear
ten cents,
cVrdi lntlio"nnslnesnireclory" rolumn,t.0
it ytit for the first two line., and ll.OUfor Mfc,
md!tlorlnllln .
Sho rat Contributor Corrects',
-. History.
llEBIVrsKOMF. !N'011TANT t'ACTH nlflllT
A lato writer professes to provo be
yond dlsptitothntno Fticli person ns W1U
Ilnin Tell over existed, nnd thereby
knocks tho story Df tho npplo Into.a;
cocked hat. ICxehange.
Certainly not, wo knew that at tup
time. No such man over lived, nnd he
didn't shoot nil' npplooiT ills hoy's hcadj
ami he didn't reply to Gcsler when asl
ul why ho had concealed another "arV
row" In bis shirt bosom "ter kill th'ec,'
tyrant, hud 1 slain ino boy !" hs Ihtf
luelo-dramatlo gentleman says in "tlie
play; 'causo why, thero witsii'Qiny
Gesler, nml Tell didn't Jiavo any boy,
and ho couldn't shoot with n crossbow,,
nnd the applq crop vas entirely eul"ofjj
that year, anyhow.
Generation after gencrutlon of credu
lous nnd confiding readers havo been
taken In regarding Tell and a reat
many other heroes of tho past. Vfo
havo lndisputoblo ovldence that Chris
topher Columbus didn't discover Amer
ica. America discovered him, but ho
got to n newspaper ofllco first and took
nil the credit to himself. No such man
as Columbus over iived.
Alexander tho Great didn't cut tho
Gordlan Knot, but got ono of tho Dav
enport Brothers to untie it, und lib
didn't weep because there wero no
more worlds to conquer; but laughed
nnd kicked up his heels and wickedly
said, "It's only this world and tho next
nnd then we're through." Alexander
tho Great was no great shakes after all.
Tom Allen could whip him the best
day ho ever saw, and we'll bet on It.
Julius Ctcsar has gono into history.
as a victim of assassins. No such thing.
Ho hired folks to kill him for a sensa
tion, and so tho widow Crcsar could col
Icct his life insurance. Rusiness was
dull at the time antl ho made money by
It.
Honnparto didn't die on tho Mt. St.
Helena, because ho never went there.
Ho put In a substltuto and then fled to
Canada, whero ho still lives, keepings
toll gate near Maiden. IIo frequently
visits Detroit, and lias reached tho old
idvanced ago of'clgbty.flve. IIo wasn't
captured by Powhatan nnd Pocahontas
didn't resctio him, for ho was released
on a writ of habeas corpus issued by the
United States Supreme Court.
Shakcspcnro never wrote any plays,
fiis plays wero all written by Uourci-
cault nnd adapted to tho stage by Mc
ICcau Buchanan.
Washington dldu't use n hatchet on
his father's cherry tree lie took his
knifo and girdled it and ho could tell
a lie, if ho wanted to, but ho didn't
want to; ho knew ho could get off oasier
without it. Ills name wasn't Georgo
Washington originally. Thero wero so
many peoplo named George Washing
Ion, and so many counties aud towns
called Wasjilngton (including the capi
tal of tho nation) that he camo to like
tlieuamojiuid had his own namo chang
ed to George Washington by net of the
legislature. How history does IIo.
Tho fly has Its uses. He serves to keep
bald-headed sinners nwakeiitcliurch on
a warm day, so that their uurcgeuurale
hearts may bo touched by the preached
word.
A gentleman asked aiiegro'boy If hu
wouldn't tnko'n plnclfof snuff. "No,"
replied thcdurkny, very ''respectfully,
"me tank you. Poinp's'ntua not hun
gry." ' -
A lady teacher was endeavoring to
Impress upon her pupils the torrlblo ef
fect of'tho punishment of Nebuchad
nezzar, saying : "Sovon yoars bo nto
grass llko n cow," when it boy asked;
"Did ho glvo milk?"
A lady has a Sunday-school class In
one of tho churches. Two brothers at
tend It alternately. Ono Sunday a lady
asked one of tho boys if ho would be
thereon tho following Sabbath? "Oh!
110," says he, "I can't, its my turn to
saw wood !"
Rabies are thoeouponsnttnehed to tho
bunds of matrimony. The Interest is
duo at rnudoni. .
Why was Pharaoh's daughter llku a
broker? Recatiso sho got it littlo pro
phet from tho rushes on tho banks.
A bachelor, in commenting upon tho
largo amount which Queen Victoria
saves annually from her s.ilary,remark
ed that "thero was a widow worth
going for."
Mr. Sinimssays if it" wasn't Tor tho
holo In tho hoop you couldn't put It on
tho barrel, and tho barrel would burst.
A correspondent (iininarrietl)suggosts
that Solomon's wisdom was duo to tho
fact that ho had seven hundred wives,
whom ho consulted on all occasions,
Loving wife at Long Hrancli "Tho
horrid surf makes pio keep my mouth
shut." Sarcastic husband "Takosomo
of It homo with you."
"Thkn your watch dou't run regu
lavly?" asked a Pike's Peakjeweller or
a customer.
"Not a run, soured 011 1110 twice yes
today." Tin: Pennsylvania Rcservo Associa
tion will meet at Lock llnven on Hie
7th of May. Tho HepubUean says a
meeting of tho Soldiers lu that vicinity
was heltl on Thursday week to complete
arrangements for the reception anil en
tertainment of the members of tho As
sociation, nnd nnother meeting is to bo
hold on tho lllst Inst. Col. Win, H.
Maim, of Philadelphia, will deliver the
address nt the meeting of tho Absocla.
Hon in May.
Kvuuy Americnn boy lias aright to
lenrti whatQvorlpinestirado his own in
clination, underdils father's direction,
may lend lilm to. And when hu lias
leniiud it, any man bus a right to oiler
lilm employment, and ho lias n right to
accept It. All combinations that In
frltigo upon thiho aie against the plain-
est interests o tho community.
A young lady nronouf tho Urt fam
ilies of Hridgeport, whoso father inndo
11 foitiitiu selling motqulto-bar blankets
furnriiiy me, went into a drugstore,
tho other day, and asked for a bottlo ct
"Hair Manure" It was "Rencwor"
that she wanted.