Democratic watchman. (Bellefonte, Pa.) 1855-1940, September 28, 1923, Image 2

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    Benoa adn
Bellefonte, Pa., September 28, 1923.
a —
WANTED—MEN TO LEAD.
There isn’t a lad but wants to grow
Manly and true at heart,
And every lad would like to know
The secret we impart.
He doesn’t desire to slack or shirk,
Oh, haven't you heard him plead?
He'll follow a man at play or work,
If only the man will lead.
‘Where are the men to lead today,
Sparing an hour or two,
Teaching the lads the game to play
Just as a man should do?
Village and slums are calling, “Come.”
Here are the boys, indeed;
Who can tell what they might become
If only the men will lead?
Motor and golf and winter sport
Fill up the time a lot,
But wouldn’t you like to feel you’d taught
Even the boy a knot?
Country and home depend on you,
Character most we need;
How can a lad know what to do
If there isn’t a man to lead?
‘Where are the men to lend a hand,
Guiding at boyhood’s side?
Men who will rise in every land,
Bridging the “Great Divide?”
Nation and flag and tongue unite,
Joining each class and creed.
Here are the boys who would do the right,
But where are the men to lead?
FEW FEMALE HUMORISTS.
By L. A. Miller.
Whether true or otherwise, it is al-
leged that but a very limited number
of funny women exist. The country
is full of funny men, either alleged or
real. Why not funny women?
This should be an excellent topic for
Women’s Clubs to consider. Surely
the men cannot be blamed for fencing
them out of this field, because it is
open on all sides, and may be occu-
pied without let or hindrance.
There have been, and are still, ex-
cellent poets, novelists, musicians, lec-
turers and readers, among the sisters
of men; but for some unknown, yet
good and sufficient reason, none have
risen to fame as humorists or music-
al composers.
The why and the wherefore of this
ought to be set forth, and who is bet-
ter qualified for the task than a wom-
an? There are a great many things
to find out yet before the world is as
wise as it may be, and one of these is
why women are not humorous. They
enjoy fun to its fullest extent, and
are the best patrons and friends of
funny men; yet, when they come to
write, they are almost universally sen-
timental, prosey and heavy. Proba-
bly more than half of the books writ-
ten by women are negative in charac-
ter; that is, they are devoted to find-
ing fault with the existing state of
affairs. The remainder of their books
are made up of poetry, fiction, cook-
ery, and such like.
Even their poetry is largely of the
melancholy type, and about as sug-
gestive of the flatus of indigestion as
the inflatus of poesy. Just there is a
tender point. To say that women are
not witty, is to offend the entire sis-
terhood; therefore, it were better left
unsaid. Indeed, it would not be
strictly true if it were said, although
there is but little on record to show
that any of them have ever distin-
guished themselves in that way. How-
ever, they have a better record as
wits than humorists. It is said that
much of the credit given to Charles
Lamb for wit is due to his sister.
Sundenburg, in his “Conjugal Love,”
said that males are masculine, and fe-
males feminine, in soul as well as in
ody.
The masculine element is love cloth-
ed in wisdom; while the feminine is
wisdom clothed with love. Hence the
characteristic of man is wisdom, or
understanding, and that of woman
love, or affection.
Between the poet Otway and the
seer of Stockholm it is possible to
get a clue to the reason why women
are not funny fellows, or given to al-
leged wit. They are above such
things; or rather beyond them, while
men are so surrounded that they can-
not help being affected more or less.
The humorist’s lot is not a happy
one, the prevailing opinion to the
contrary notwithstanding. He is gen-
erally bilious and splenetic, and lives
in two worlds—the one in cloud-land,
from whence he looks down upon the
vagaries of his fellow-man, seeing
them magnified and illuminated; the
other beneath clouds, where all is
cheerless and chilling. He feels, while
here, that life is not worth the trouble
it costs to live, and wonders why men
are such fools as to fight and struggle
for existence. It is here that he phil-
osophizes on the phenomenon of life.
Artemus Ward, who of all humor-
ists was the most philosophical, lived
the greater portion of his time under
sombre clouds. He knew there was a
brighter world, but, somehow, he
could not keep in it. We call this bil-
jousness, induced by habits of life pe-
culiar to those who live under clouds.
It is said that all humorists are sad-
Hearted; either from their natural dis-
position or from their associations.
As if followed by cruel fate or venge-
ful spirits, the fountains from which
they drink are embittered, their pet
hobbies carry them into’ bramble
thickets, and their grandest schemes
turn out to be only castles in the air.
This is not universally the case, but
it is probably a fact that they suffer
more than ordinary mortals; not by
reason of being more sorely beset by
evil genii but because they are more
sensitive.
sess a clearly and highly sensitive
brain; sensitive enough to appreciate
the things that pass the ordinary
mind unnoticed, or, at least, undefined,
and clear enough to define them and
give them form and color.
In reality, the humorist and poet
are artists, as much as the painter and
sculptor, the difference being only in
the manner of exhibiting their skill.
The name ‘or reputation of being a
funny fellow amounts to almost a
calamity. Everybody laughs at him;
not in derision, of course, but at his
remarks.
The humorist must pos-
His smile sets a parlor-ful
of young folks to giggling, and a
glance from his eye will cause the av-
erage seminary girl to “just die”
a-laughing. :
Bob Burdette, who was always a
very companionable fellow, and one
who enjoyed fun to the fullest extent,
said he was almost bored to death by
poeple laughing at him. If he asked
for another potato or buckwheat cake
at breakfasst, some one was sure to
snort out laughing and exclaim, “Why
Mr. Burdette, how funny you are!”
To suggez: = siesta on the back porch
convulsed the entire household, while
a midnight hint that he was tired and
would have to take an early train in
order to make his next appointment,
literally doubled them up. .
There are some alleged humorists
who love to be laughed at. So fond
are they of this style of appreciation
that they do not hesitate to make
fools of themselves to secure it.
These, however, do not figure much
outside of their narrow circle of ac-
quaintances. They are rarely able to
materialize their fun on paper, or, if
they did, it would be apt to take a
header into the waste basket.
Humorous writers seldom display
much humor in their conversation.
As a rule they are quiet, reserved, and
court seclusion. If this disposition is
an essential qualification for a humor-
ist, it is not necessary to seek furth-
er for the reason why there are no
women in the business. Humorists
are born such, and they have an im-
portant mission to fulfill.
They have to expose the other side
of life to view, thereby breaking the |
monotony of business and care. Wom-
en also have a mission, which, in
some respects, does not differ great-
ly from that of the humorist. It is
for them to make home happy and
| cheerful, and thus dispel, day by day,
the cares and worriment that settle
about the hearts and minds of men.
OHIO AND OTHER PRESIDENTS.
Six Presidents have come from the
State of Ohio, crediting those who
have filled that station to the States
in which they resided when they were
elected. Five came from Virginia and
five from New York. Ohio heads the
list.
But a queer fatality has followed .
the six Ohio Presidents. The first
from that State was William H. Har-
rison, who served but one month. He
was the first to die in office. The next
President from Ohio was Rutherford
B. Hayes on whose title some conceiv-
ed a cloud to rest. He was not a ean-
didate for re-election. Garfield was
the third and his sad fate is known to
all. He died on the nineteenth of Sep-
tember following his inauguration.
Then came William McKinley, who
served one full term, dying on the
fourteenth of September following his
second induction into office. William
Howard Taft was the next Ohio man
on whom the choice fell. In his effort
for re-election, he carried two States,
Vermont and Utah. Last came War-
ren G. Harding, who served but little
more than half his term when death
removed him from the list.
The six Ohio Presidents ruled the
country in the aggregate fifteen
years 8 twenty-three
days, or an average for each of two
years, seven months and four days.
The five Virginia Presidents were at
the head of the nation for thirty-five
years, nine months and four days, an
average for each of seven years, one
month and twenty-five days. They
were in power considerably more than
twice as long as the six from Ohio.
New York has had five Presidents
and in the aggregate they served
twenty-five years and seven months,
or an average of five years, one month
and twelve days each. When it is re-
called that of the New York Presi-
dents three succeeded to the presiden-
cy by the death of the President and
threfore served out fractions of terms,
the average is higher than one might
expect and is notably greater than
that of the Ohio Presidents. New
York with its five Presidents has
twenty-five years and a fraction to its
credit in the office to more than thir-
ty-five years for Virginia. Judged by
the length of time that the sons of
Virginia occupied the office known to
our people, that Commonwealth still
has the right to call itself the mother
of Presidents. It will be some years
before any State overtakes Virginia
in that respect.
New York has the best chance of
doing it. Even if Virginia does not
have another President soon, New
York will have to succeed in more
than one election to overcome the Old
Dominion, :
In the meantime, Virginia may be
called upon again some day to furnish
a Chief Executive. It has been sev-
enty-eight years since a Virginian oc-
cupied the White House.
Just now Massachusetts is taking
her turn. No Massachusetts man has
exercised the supreme power since
John Quincy Adams went out of office
on the fourth of March, 1829, nearly
a century ago. °°
Some other States are awaiting
their turn.—Reformatory Record.
sei
Dr. Swartz Gives Land to Bucknell.
Dr. James S. Swartz, former treas-
urer of the International Mercantile
Marine, New York city, recently do-
nated to Bucknell University a 600-
aere tract of land situated along the
Potomac river between Washington
D. C., and Mt. Vernon, Va. The land,
which is traversed by the interurban
railway running between these cities,
is valued conservatively at $60,000.
The land is ideally situated in the his-
toric valley made famous by General
Washington and will probably be de-
veloped into a suburban residential
community, = Dr. Swartz has been a
member of the University board of
trustees for nearly forty years and
has been for the 'past seven years
chairman of that body.
Cr ——
Non-Church Goers Fined.
(An old law is still extant in Vir-
ginia which imposes a fine of fifty
pounds of tobacco on 2 man if he ab-
sents himself from, church for one
month without a valid excuse.
rm —— A ———.
. Aunt Het.
“I reckon I trust Pa as much as any
wife ought to trust a husband, but I
ain’t never took in a female boarder.”
, TIMBER BILLIONS OF
i THE NORTHWEST.
i Hundreds of logging camps are
pushing back the forest frontier.
i Cities with a permanent economic
‘ support in lumber are springing up.
One hundred and fifty thousand men
{in camps and mills already are pro-
ducing nearly one-third the nation’s
| lumber cut. By trainloads and ship-
i loads the great forest crop, worth
1 $350,000,000 a year, moves eastward
{ throughout our own country and to
| foreign lands.”
“The world demands more of it to
build and grow. The Pacific North-
west can supply it. ~On the slopes of
the Cascades, the Coast Range and
! the Olympics of Oregon and Wash-
ington, in the Coeur d’Alenes, the
Bitterroots and Rockies of Idaho,
Montana and Wyoming is half the
timber of the United States. Here is
America’s great forest reserve. A
vast storehouse of natural wealth
measuring 970 billion board feet! If
these great forests should not stop
' growing, and cutting should proceed
| at the present rate, they would yield
110 billion feet worth $350,000,000
| every year for 100 years. But growth
. continues at a rate that adds to the
| supply more than half the amount an-
i nually cut. And cutting must shortly
{increase to two or three times the
| present amount, in the opinion of the
United States Forest Service. Ex-
perts agree that within the next fif-
i teen years the burden of supplying
‘the bulk of the country’s needs for
lumber will rest upon the Pacific
Northwest.”
“America has an amazing appetite !
for wood. We use two-fifths of the
total wood consumption. Our annual
ration is 40 billion feet of lumber, 87
million railroad ties, 53 million cords
! of pulp wood, and 110 million cords of
uel. We have $5,000,000,000 invest-
ed in plants that make lumber, wood
products and paper. These 75,000 es-
tablishments employ 1,350,000 work-
ers. Nor is that all. Every industry, !
no matter what, is dependent in part’
on the forest.”
“Let us look for a moment at these
vast areas of timber wealth, the most :
magnificent forests in the world.
First, the most wonderful forest of a
i single type the giant Douglas firs of
western Oregon and western Wash-
ington. In this almost unbroken
stand, 350 miles long and 100 miles
wide, is more than half the timber of
the Pacific Northwest—558 billion
feet. These are the “big trees” of the
Pacific Northwest. Trees six feet in
diameter and 200 feet high are com-
mon. Long timbers for ship and car
construction, and highly finished
boards for interior uses of many kinds
are obtained from these mammoth
trees. The products of the Douglas
fir forests are shipped by rail and
water to many parts of this country
and of the world.”
i The other principal varieties of saw
| timber are the western yellow pine, |
i of which there are about 100 billion
i feet, and the western white pine, of
{ which there are 20 million feet.
Western yellow pine—sometimes
! known in the lumber trade as western
| pine—is found throughout the Pacfic
| Northwest but the heaviest stands
are in central and eastern Oregon
| and in parts of Montana and Idaho.
It has long been a wood of recognized
value for all sorts of uses. It com-
petes now in the markets of the cen-
tral States, and to a less degree in the
eastern States, with the yellow pines
from the southern region.
The largest forest of western white
pine in the world is found in Northern
Idaho and lapping over somewhat in-
to western Montana. It contains 20
billion feet—three-fourths of the
white pine in the United States. It
is the occurrence of this species that
is responsible for the building up of
the lumber industry there. From the
standpoint of general utility as well
as value, there are few substitutes
for white pine.
; Western larch, however, is the dis-
tinctive tree of western Montana, and
with western yellow pine and Doug-
las fir it makes up the principal com-
mercial forests there. Larch is used
principally as a heavy construction
timber. On the east side of the Con-
tinental Divide in Montana and Wyo-
ming the species are Douglas fir,
lodgepole pine, yellow pine, and some
species of less importance. Lodge-
pole pine occasionally grows large
enough for saw logs but usually it is
best suited for railroad ties and mine
timbers. It is largely used for these
purposes. The chief forest industry
of Wyoming is in the utilization of
lodgepole pine for railroad ties.
About two-thirds of the great for-
ests of the Pacific Northwest are own-
ed privately, while one-third are own-
ed by the Federal government. The
National Forests were set aside to
insure the permanent production of
timber, to protect the watersheds of
navigable streams, and to preserve
water supplies for cities and for ir-
rigation and power. . Sales of timber
es are made by the government to
private concerns.
Mistletoe a Parasite.
If the silent signal of the mistletoe
hanging from the chandelier means
anything to you next Christmas, re-
member for an instant that in the
southwest it is a commercial pest, and
that for 12 years scientists have been
studying its depredations and how
best to exterminate it.
Mistletoe fastens on the yellow pine
tree, checks growth, and finally caus-
es the tree to die. By the Department
of Agriculutre it is called an “insidi-
ous and destructive disease,” and its
eradication is an important problem.
About the only way to get rid of
this parasite is to cut down the tree
on which it has fastened. The mistle-
toe dies with its host, the yellow pine.
—————— Ais
Evidence.
Cole Black had fallen afoul of the
law and was having a preliminary
conference with his attorney.
“Can’t you prove an alibi?” asked
the latter.
“Al—says which, boss?”
“Alibi. Can you prove where you
were at the time the offense was com-
mitted 2" Yoni
. “Lawdy, boss; dat’s jes” what Ah’s
skeered dey’s gwine to do!”—Ameri-
can Legion Weekly.
from these forests on long time leas-
BEFORE SHE COULD STOP HIM
Bride’s Husband Thoughtlessly Re
veals Hidden Unwashed Dishes to
Her Mother-in-Law.
I had been married only a week, and
my husband was proud of my good
housekeeping. As he came home from
bis work tired at might, I decided not
to let him help me with the dishes, and
yet I wanted to remain fresh and
the problem in this way.
The stove in our kitchen contained
two ovens—one large, and, my husband
thought, useless. However, I was of
a different mind regarding it, for after
1 had washed the pots, pang silver,
and glassware, I rinsed the remaining
dishes and surreptitiously shoved them
into the large oven—which we never
used. The next morning I washed
them with the breakfast dishes, and
friend husband was none the wiser,
My husband's mother was the last
word in housewifely neatness, and I
had often heard George laud her sys
‘tem in the kitchen. One evening she
came bag and baggage to pay us an
unexpected visit. The next morning
"at breakfast, my husband directed her
, attention to our dainty Kkitchen—and
i then before I could stop him opened
the large oven door to exhibit its spa-
clousness—revealing the hidden un-
washed evidences of my sloth!
The look of housewifely horror on
the face of my mother-in-law is never
' to be forgotten.—Chicago Tribune.
LESSENING RISKS TO LIFE
Automatic Illumination of Lifeboatr
When They Are Launched From
Ship Is Tested.
An invention for lessening risks to
life at sea by the automatic illumina-
tion of lifeboats when they are
, launched from a ship’s side has just
| been tested by British board of trade
officials.
The inventors are two partners in
the firm of Messrs. T. Blair & Co,
ship’s store merchants, in Bast London.
By their device two small electric
lamps are switched on by contact es-
tablished from g float contained in a
tube fixed to the sternpost of the life-
boat.
The float is forced up the tube by
water when the boat is launched.
Storage batteries capable of giving
twenty-four hours’ continuous light to
the lamps are carried on board.
Under present board of trade regu-
! 1ations every ship's lifeboat has to
! carry an oil lamp and a dozen boxes
' of matches in a sealed watertight tin.
! The inveutors of the new device
| claim that it will eliminate much of
! the risk of liftboats being run down.
i . i ————
| A Genius.
| A crusty banker who had risen to af-
| duence from an humble start on a
farm had half promised a boyhood
| friend to give the Mtter’s son a place
in his office. The old farmer came in
to talk the matter over and was rather
timorous about the boy's qualifications,
explaining that he was just a country
! Jad who knew how to plow, take care
| of pigs and milk. He wound up by
stating: ‘The boy knows enough to
keep his mouth shut. That's about all
I can say.”
The listener for the first time dis-
played interest.
“That's enough,” declared the bank-
er. “That's education enough for any
| man.”
Origin of Word “Brandy.”
The original name of the liquor
gnown as brandy was brandywine,
from the fact that (in the countries
where it is not prohibited by law) it
was, and still is produced by the dis-
tillation of wines. The word lost its
“wine” part because the English lan-
guage has the happy faculty -of drop-
| ping unessential parts of words to
save time.
“Brandy” traces its origin to the
word “brand,” as in “brand from the.
burning,” for the simple reason that
the product known as “brandy” or
“cognac” was produced by the process
of burning, which in all the Germanic
languages is designated by some form
of the word “brand.” To the word
“brand” as in “brandy,” the word
“burn” is also related.
Allowing Days of Grace.
In the reign of Henry II the day
| irst mentioned in each term of court
| was called “essoign day,” because the
' court then took the essoigns or ex-
| cuses of those who did not appear
according to the summons of the
writs. But as—by a custom traced
by Blackstone to the Germans of the
days of Tacitus—three days of grace
were allowed every defendant in
which to appear, the courts did not
sit for the dispatch of business until
the fourth day after that time, On
the other hand, they continued to sit
until the fourth day after the last
return. The rule allowing days of
grace in the United States was adopt:
ed from the English law.
E—————— eect
Relative Importar~e,
It talres an older child to ~vnlain te
the little fellows the intricacies of
school management,
“My teacher's sick, will I git to go
home?” adked little Joe.
“Not on yer life.” answered Mike.
aged ten. “Then yer principal tele-
phones: in an’ gits a sustitoot teacher.”
“Oh-0-0-0. An’ if the principal is
sick,” edked Joe, “does a teacher tele-
phone in an’ git a sustitoot principal?”
“Nah,” Mike informed him. “That
ain't necessary. The principal ain't
got nothin’ to do, He jest sits in the
office. I hel git sick, the janitor ‘d
go in there an’ take his place.”—Phila-
delphia Ledger. :
dainty for him in the evening. I solved |
CHARACTER NEED IN FICTION
Fewer Complexes and More Personal-
ities Is Essential in American
Scenes, Canby Says.
Character is essentially what the
American scene has to offer the mak-
ers of literature—character, the es-
sence of the novel (to which plot is
only a convenience), the chief ingre-
dient of all literature not lyrical or
philosophic. The characters that have
escaped description so far in the
United States! I know a dozen which,
‘properly interpreted, and transmogri-
fied into art, would be worth all the
realistic, arratic, erotic naturalism in
a thousand book shops. Men and wom-
en are dying daily who would have
made novelists’ fortunes and been our
delight. Can't we have fewer com-
plexes masquerading as humans, less
social conscience, not so many dusty,
dirty details of suppressed lives and
more people of blood, gristle and pas-
sion? Can’t we have more personality,
self-sustained and convincing, which
embraces all true motives and im-
pulses, of being merely compounded
of psychologists’ terms? Can't we
have men, women and children whose
names we remember although we have
known them only in a book? Russian
literature will not give them to us, not
at least our own brand; nor French,
nor British. The job waits upon Amer-
fcan writers. Perhaps in serene old
age our younger generation will find
the time to smile and do it.—Henry
Seidel Canby in Century.
“WINE” WAS SPRING WATER
An Explanation of the Split Between
Marshal Wu and Gen-
eral Feng.
nn.
The Peking correspondent of Kol
_aische Zeitung reports that everyone in
China talked of this summer's civil
war as confidently as 8 Rhenish peas-
ant talks of the next vintage.
He considers Gen. Feng Yu Hsiang
a coming man, and gives this curious
account of his alleged break with Mar-
shal Wu Pei Fu, whom he supported
against Chang Tso Lin in last sum-
mer’s civil war.
It seems that Marshal Wu Pei Fu
was having a great birthday celebra-
tion. His entire camp was en fete.
Such observances are always important
in China, and In case of prominent
leaders are the occasion for political
demonstrations and the laying of polit-
ical plans.
Wu Pei Fu is a “lover of good
liquor.” His Christian lieutenant, Gen.
Feng Yu Hsiang, is a total abstainer
and a prohibitionist. Indeed, his army
of roundhead followers is as white rib-
bon as himself. Among the gifts to
the marshal were naturally many cases
of wine, and especially of Chinese
spirits distilled from rice.
When these were opened at the mar-
shal’s birthday banquet, it was discov-
ered that the offering from the Chris-
tian general contained geod spring
water. This caused some Irritation,
and, added to other differences, has
made the two leaders enémies.
Le
Written Language for Belgians.
In the ordinary way the natives of
che Belgian Congo do not wear any
clothing, but sometimes put on a hat
or a ribbon or carry a sunshade when
they are going to have a photograph
taken. This is considered a social
event. These black people are very
moral and live better lives than many
of the well-dressed persons in other
parts of the world.
Missionaries in the Congo have de
veloped a written language for the
natives by jotting down the sounds as
they fall from the lips of these deni-
zens of the African forests. The wap
they teach the natives is to instruct the
brightest among the younger men and
women, and they in turn instruct the
others,
Measles Old as the Race.
Measles is probably as old as the
cace, In ancient times it was diagnosed
as a form of smallpox. Somewhere
about the Tenth or Eleventh centuries,
when Arab culture and science flamed
high in a mentally dark world, Arab
physicians distinguished the difference
between the two diseases. These men
noted that having smallpox did not
give immunity to measles and having
measles did not give immunity to
smallpox. They studied both diseases
and pointed out the difference in the
eruptions. But measles continued to
be confounded with scarlet fever until
the latter half of the Seventeenth cen-
tury, when Sydenham, an English phy-
siclan, pointed out the difference in
the symptoms and the eruptions.
Worries of Mrs. Toodles.
Movies were very real to tendem
hearted: Mrs. Toodles. She always
wept freely through the sad scenes
and considered that her favorite ac-
tress was nothing short of an angel
with a baby stare. So when she came
home looking grave Mr. Toodles knew
that something serious had happened.
“What's wrong, my dear?’ asked
he.
“I don't like this. My favorite hero-
ine is playing a vamp,” she replied.
“You mustn't let that worry you. It
is only pretense. You know that.”
“Maybe so. But where did she learn
to smoke cigarettes?”
Nome Plagues From Victim's Colon.
The term “white plague” originated
among the early Greek physicians and
was so called by them owing te the ex-
treme whiteness of the body and the
attendant terrible emaciation. The
white plague. black plague and yellow
plague are all characterized by white
ness, blackness and yellowness of the
body.
A ——
THACKERAY AND THE MOVIES
Member of School Class Says Hire
Novel “Gives a Picture” of Time of
Queen Elizabeth,
A class in a certain school in the
city was reading the biography of Wil-
Ham Makepeace Thackeray. The les-
son was an intensive one, and the ob-
ject was to read a paragraph, then
give every point it contained.
One boy had recited in full sup-
posedly, when Clifford became much
concerned as indicated by his wry
face and an eagerness to be heard.
“He left out a very important point,”
he said.
The class mewnbers registered dis-
approval on their countenances and
negative nods here and there. Clif-
ford bristled slightly at the idea of dis-
agreement.
“He did leave out an important
point,” he urged, insistently.
“What was that?” asked the teacher,
“That Thackeray was in the moving
picture business,” replied the boy. The
class snickered in spots, and it was
necessary for the teacher to intercede,
“Where did you read that, Clifford?”
she said.
With flourish and decision he
promptly opened his book and read:
“Thackery’s novel, ‘Henry Esmond,’
gives a picture of the time of Queen
Anne.”
WAS JUST LIKE THE REST
Teacher in Small Town Finds Every
One Related to Every
One Else.
I went to a small town to teach
school, and found that every one
seemed to be related to every one else,
That cut me off from all chance for
friendly gossip, for one could never tell
when she would be gossiping in front
of some adoring aunt or cousin.
I was explaining this, laughingly, to
a girl in the town who had been nice
© me.
She remarked: “Yes, that is so, but
1 am one exception—we have no rela.
tives here outside our immediate fam-
ily—you may gossip to me about any
one.”
“Well, the people I want most to
gossip about are some newlyweds—
don’t know their name, but she calls
him ‘darling Donnie dear,’ and they
are too silly to be around sane people.”
“Oh,” replied my friend, “I had for-
gotten about my brother Don and his
wife—they've been married about a
month, but we don’t think they are
sillier than anybody else, *—Exchange.
.
Pantomime 22 Centuries Old.
The word “pantomime” is about
twenty-two centuries old, says’ the
Cleveland Plain Dealer. It originally
meant an actor and not the act. Lit-
erally, the word means the “mime” or
imitator of everything, and imitate
everything the old Greek and Roman
actors could and did. Their plays were
usually in dumb show, and movements
and gesticulations formed the actor's
chief art.
Later, the pantomime—which now
has come to mean the act—was con-
tinued into the Middle Ages in the
form of the play of Pantaloon, Col-
umbine and Harlequin—Clown was a
later addition—who are supposed by
some scholars to represent the ancient
deities of the original pantomime. A
little later still, pantomime had turned
into a ballet, still without words and
still centering round Harlequin and the
rest.
Hawthorn Respected in Ireland.
Whitethorn, or, as it is better
gnown, hawthorn, blooms in May. Its
blossoms are much whiter than those
of the blackthorn, and have a de-
licious perfume.
In Ireland hawthorns are regarded
with much respect as belonging to the
fairies, and certain large trees all over
the country are known as “gentry
bushes,” gentry being a name by
which fairies are sometimes desig-
nated, says the Detroit News. The
cutting down of one of these old
thorns was supposed to bring had
luck. In Sir Samuel Fefguson's poem,
“The Fairy Thorn,” reference is made
to the disappearance of one Anna
Grace, who went to a dance under
one of the ancient bushes. !
It is likewise believed that to carfy
a spray of hawthern into a house
forbodes the coming of death to one
of the inmates. In the south of Eng-
land-the fruit is called “pixies’ pears.”
Our Favorite Recipe.
“Pow may we evict the skunks
from under our house?’ is the some-
what startling question asked by a
reader of an agricultural magazine.
Another reader, from the depths of a
wider experience, answers the question
'thue: See that the wall is tight where
they live, but leave an opening for
them to go out. Take a bottle of
household ammonia, pull out the cork,
slip a long stick In its nlace, and
ghove the hottle into the skunk’s hah-
{tation Raise the stick and smash
the hottle. The skrnks will alk mach
out, saying: “Our odor may be a little
disagreeahle to our enemies, but here
they are using poison gas on us! We
call that low ‘down! They dislike
the fumes so much that it is said
they never come back.—The Quthook.
Nickel Plating.
The object to be nickel plated fis
made the cathode of a battery or dyna-
mo delivering a current of about six
volts. A piece of nickel is made the
andde. The electrolrte between the
poles of the dynamo is a solution of
goluble salt of nickel. The passing of
the current from the anode through
the solution to the cathode causes a
deposit of nickel on the object.