fonte, Pa., August 4, 1911. —————————————————————————— 1g Old England. General Pillet of Faun wr of “L'angieterre vue a L ‘ns ses Provinces,” published . ‘fe murderers a bundred ye. ‘nerally went scot free in Englau * this engag- ing work the author .. that “the murder of a married woman by her husband is hardly recognized as a crime. If by some rare chauce the guilty husband is brought to justice he is bound to be acquitted. This ac- counts for the heavy death rate among women in England. Most English men of fifty have been married at least three times.” Pillet had been a prisoner of war in England and pub- lished this work In revenge. It was so full of libelous statements that its circulation was forbidden by the French government, and the few copies available brought very high Apparently the English did not con- sider the work very dangerous, as a copy was secured for the British mu- seum. A Well Deserved Snub. On one occasion an English gentle- man called to see Lord Westmoreland on particular business. He was at breakfast and, receiving him with his usual urbanity, asked the object of his visit. The gentleman said that he felt somewhat aggrieved, as he had brought an official letter of introduction to him from the foreign office and, having learned that his lordship had given a great dinner the night before, was sur- prised and hurt at receiving no invita- tion. Lord Westmoreland exclaimed, with his usual heartiness: “God bless me, sir, I am really quite distressed. I think I received the letter of which you speak. [I will send for it.” Ac- cordingly the letter was brought to him, and on reading it he sald to the stranger: *‘Ah, I thought so! There, sir, is the letter, but there is no men- tion of dinner in it.” On which the gentleman rose and backed out of the room in confusion. How He Won the Votes. A physician in a small town wanted to be mayor. Politicians told him he bad no chance—the machine was against him. A few days before the election be printed the following card in the paper: “To the People of Bingtown-—1 am getting old and have decided that be- fore I die I would like to be mayor of Bingtown. I have no particular plat- form to run on except that I want the office. | have lived here forty years, have paid my taxes without a murmur, collected what 1 conld and forgiven and forgotten many omissions. If I am not elected I will publish in the Bingtown Herald what 1 know about people in this community.” When the votes were counted the cld doctor received all but three, and those three were cast by people who had moved into the town that spring.—S8t. Louis Post-Dispatch. The Property Man Knew. An English actor tells a good story of the old days of the touring fitup companies. They were at Oldham playing a melodrama cailed “Current Cash.” One of the properties essential to the piece was a light rowing scull, with which the hero had to push him- self off into the stream. When the company reached Oldham the oar was missing, but the property man prom- ised to have ome ready for the even- ing’s perforinance, says the Pall Mall Gazette. That afternoon, with evident pride, he produced from the sacred re- cesses of his room an real human skull, and when it was pointed out to him that it was hardly what was required he declared in haughty tones: “If that skull's good enough for ‘Hamlet’ it ought to be good enough for a piece like ‘Current Cash." —.—.,.S Thanking the Bishop. A vicar in England was taken sud- denly ill, and his church warden was in great difficulty abour getting a sub- stitute when the bishop of the diocese, hearing of the circumstance, offered to take the Sunday services himself. The church warden, wishing “to do the right thing.” at the close of the service went up to the bishop and after thank. ing bim stammered out. “A poorer preacher would have done for us, your lordship, but we were unable to find one!" The American Temperament. “You observe,” remarked the host, who was showing the distinguished for- eign visitor around Newport, “that we Americans devote ourselves to pleasure regardless of expense." : “I'd hardly put it that way." retorted the witty foreigner. “Rather you de-' vote yourselves to expense regardless of pleasure.”—Boston Transcript. : His Comparison. | “Footlite is a good actor.” said a playwright who was criticising a New York production wherein the hero's part was very badly cast, “and in this part he does his best: but. by Jove, doesn’t he remind you of n man trying to play a Tschaikowsky symphony on | a typewriter?” ————————————————— i Hopeless Case. “Why don't you make hay while the sun shines and" — “Huh! If I tried to do that it'd just be my luck to get sunstruck.”-Phila- delphia Ledger. ! | ing to the Oriental Economic Review ' grandchild.” £13 8 : : ine hig! Hi i lied a 2 ga fh 3 § i H 5 gif B83 1 £3 5.3 ih Se ga : § : - they might seek revenge. ar.i if by chance one of them should die ir Ix a sign of bad luck to the owner of the property where it is found. The bird is a valuable insect destroyer and in this way probably more than com- Cursing In Korea. A strange way of cursing is that of the Korean. His ordinary swear word is “Oenuma.,” or “You brute.” The Japanese have the same partiality for this term of endearment. But accord- the Korean considers himself especial ly abusive when he calls a person his child or grandchild. When he wants to call somebody down the Korean demands hotly, “Are you not my child? And the angry retort is: “What! | your child* You are my Then the first goes a step further and cries. “You are a grandchild of my grandchild! to which the rejoinder is: “You conceit. ed fellow! Have you forgotten that you are a grandchild of a grandchild of my grandchild? When their vi- tuperation reaches its climnas rhe peo- ple of Chosen at last come to the oc: cidental standard of exclaiming. “You grandchild of a dog!” Servants In Turkey. Turkey is not nearly so benighted as we imagine, for there is no servant question there. Though slavery is still recognized. the kadun (mistress of the house) is a mother to her servants, whom she treats as children. and no children in the world nre better treated than Turkish children. The most pain- ful thing the kadun can do to a maid is to say: “The master has found a good husband for thee. Thou wilt be married at such and such a time.” “Oh, mistress, what have | done to be thus abandoned?" is the usual sor- rowful response. Even after the servant's marriage the kindly relations between mistress and maid continue. There are no fixed servant wages in ‘Turkey Faithfu! servants are rewarded from time to time in accordance with their masters’ or mistresses’ good pleasure or circum- stances.~Chicago Journal. Origin of Dukes. The word duke comes from the Latin *dux,” a leader. In early Saxon times the commanders of armies were called dukes—i. e.. the leaders of the soldiery. In other words, the first duke was the first best fighting man. No regard was | bad to ancestry or present attainments or any other sort of thing beyond the simple matter of warlike efficiency. Naturally the leader of the fighting would when the fighting was over come in for the lion's share of the spoils and “honors.” and naturally again the rest | of the folks would “look up” to him, and by degrees his superiority would be imparted to his family. and a “no- bility” would spring into being. It all rested, to start with, on brute force and animal courage combined with cunning in clubbing and thrusting.—New York | American. Colored Hailstones. | Red bail is pot unknown, even In | Great Britain, for in May of 1880 there was quite a heavy fall of it at Castle wellan, in County Down. Red and | white fell together, and the red hue | was not merely on the surface of the | pellets, but went through and through. When one was squeezed between the fingers it stained them | At Minsk, ip Russia. an even stran- | ger hail shower bad fallen five years | before. Some of the pel! ‘s were ring | shaped. and. while some were distinctly | reddish, others were a bright blue. | Some scientists declare that the color ing is due to various mineral salts. i A Feeling Allusion. “]. heard Uncle Joe talking about ' something be sald be saw at the horse | races, but I know better,” confided the | recently chastised small boy to his chum. “He saw 'em right here, and they're my ma and pa.” ! “What did be say?" asked the chum. “He said he saw a spanking team.” | -Baltimore American. | ——— co p——————— Long and Short Division. Teacher—~Tommy, how many is the half of eight? ‘Tommy-On top or gldeways? Teacher—What do you mean by on top or sideways? ~Why, half from the top of 8 is 0 and | half of it sideways is 3.~ExclLange. I “He seems to “Yes, problems that ' MEASURING THE EARTH. J Erastosthenes Made the First Attempt and Did Fairly Well. The earliest attempt to measure the circumference of the earth was made by a Greek, Erastosthenes, who was He found that at while at Alexandria the gno- andria bore the same relation to the circumference of the small circle de- scribed from the top of the gnomon as a center that the distance between the two cities bore to the circumference of the globe. This latter was 5.000 stadia, or about 620 miles, which when mul- tiplied by fifty gives 31.250 miles as the circumference of the earth. This result is not quite correct, but as nearly so as could be expected from the first rough attempt to estimate fit. —New York Mall. Mexico's Way With Women. Woman's place in Mexican life is the inevitable mingling of the Moorish ideas of the Spanish conquerors and the savage ideas of the natives, the Milwaukee Sentinel say: The Castil- fan hides his wife und daughters be- hind stone walls and the picturesque | lattices of romance, und he is their lord and master. On the other band, | the Indian tribes are. of course, still | bound by the spirit of the ancient sav- age customs. Historians tell of one of | the baptismal ceremonies of the Mesh- fe tribes, who fought their way to su- | premacy long before the Spanish ar- rived on the scene. To each boy baby the priests chanted thix command: ! “Thy profession and faculty is war, thy obligation to give the nn to drink blood of the enemies and fhe earth | corpses of the foes” To the girl baby | they said with far less ceremonial: | “You are to stay within the house, as ; the heart does within the bndy. Our | Lord enshrines you in that place, and | your office is to fetch and to grind | maize in the metate.” { Jokai's Joke. : At a banquet held in his honor in Tor- da, Maurus Jokal was called upon to ' propose the toast of “The Ladies.” He made an excellent speech, during which he continually toyed with the ' brown curls upon his forehead Final: | Iy he said: “I raise my glasx in honor of the gracious ladies of Tordn. May they all live until my hair grows gray.” His audience drank to the toast, but it was easy to see by the faces of the ladiex present that they did not think much of the compliment. Jokai rose again from his seat and took from his hend a magnificent brown wig, showing an entirely bald head beneath it. “My hair.” he added. “will never grow gray." And the Ila. dies, who bad not known of his bald- ness, were more than pacified Plants Without Roots. The “flower of the air” is a curious plant found in China and Japan. It is so called because it appears to have no | root and is never fixed to the earth. It twines around a dry tree or sterile rock. Each shoot produces two or. three flowers like a lily—white, trans- | parent and odoriferous. It is capable | of being transported G00 or 700 miles, and it grows as it travels. suspended on a twig. A Fidgety Age. Repose of manner was considered at one time essential to the well bred woman, but this is an iden! long con- signed to tne past. Every one fidgets in these restless days. no one has time to sit still nor to listen for more than a minute at a time without being bored | and showing it.—London Queen. Generally. Figg (sententiously)- To him that hath shall be given. you know Fogg —Yes, the man who has a nead gets ahead. I've noticed.~Roston Transcript. -— amt mW ANY ATA AWAY AVY AY AY AY AY AY a AY ATV.a A vtemobhiles. More Worry. al Suan know you admired that offi- “I don't,” replied the political man- ager. “Then why do you insist on crediti him with a as boom?” os “Merely to make his life harder by giving him something more to worry about.” — Exchange. _ People who are troubled by fermenta- Yon i thie stotiach, Soul oF bitter fsings, irregular; bowels or sluggishness iy medicine ——Subscribe for the WATCHMAN. Medical. Do it Now BELLEFONTE PEOPLE SHOULD NOT WAIT UNTIL IT IS TOO LATE. The appalling death-rate from kidney disease is due in most cases to the fact that the little kidney troubles are usually ne tlected until they become serious. The slight symptoms give place to chronic dis- orders and the sufferer goes gradually into the grasp of diabetes, dropsy, Eright'e disease, gravel or some other serious form of kidney complaint. If you suffer from backache, headache, dizzy spells; if the kidney secretions are irregular of passage and unnatural in ap- pearance, do not delay. Help the kidneys at once. Doan’s Kidney Pills are especially for kidney disorders—they cure where others fail. Over one hundred thousand peo- ple have recommended them. Here's a case at home: Mrs. John Fisher, 51 S. Water Street., Bellefonte, Pa., says: “I can recommend Doan’s Kidney Pills just as highly today as | did three years ago, I gave a public statement in their favor. A member of my family procured Doan’s Kidney Piils from Green's Pharmacy Co. and received prompt and permanent relief through their use from an attack of kidney com- plaint. I have also taken Doan's Kidney Pills for backache and pains through my kidneys and they have always had the desired effect. You are weicome to publish this statement.” For sale by all dealers. Price 50 cents. Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, New York, sole agents for the United States. Remember the name—Dean's—and take no other. 56-28 Money to Loan. ONEY TO LOAN on good security and houses t t.. "Tw NE