.
Bellefonte, Pa., July 23, 1909.
Rr ————
Queer Ones Gleaped From a
High School Examination.
Among the questions in an examina-
in definitions in a well regulated
school in an eastern city were
+ “What Is a broncho?’ “What is
boomerang?’ “What is a panto-
7 “What is a cartoon?’ And
these four excited some most remark-
able answers. The following bona fide
replies, taken at random from the pa-
show in many cases decided orig-
lity, to say the least, but they like-
wise display the effect of imperfect
enunciation and pronunciation and of
the association of ideas without due
regard to “sense.”
In reply to the first query, “What is
a broncho?' were the following: A
broncho is an herb used as a medicine,
a part of your body, a foreigner, a
man that lives on ranches.
“What i= a boomerang?’ called
forth, among others, these: A boomer-
ang is a species of the baboon family,
what an Indian chews, something ex-
plosive.
The replies to “What is a panto-
mime?’ included the following: A pan-
tomime is an animal that eats human
flesh, a person who finda fault, a man
who is always on the bad side of ev-
erything, a trunk, a box to carry peo-
ple in, resting on the shoulders of four
men; a vision of one's former sins.
As for the question “What is a car-
toon?” that seemed to excite the wild-
est ideas of all, and there were brought
i
forth such answers as these: A car-
toon is a vessel for holding articles, a
strong windstorm, a kind of fish, a
bunch of flowers presented to a hero
or a nobleman, a soldier's water bottle,
a statue, a strong gust of wind.—New
York Tribune.
MONTENEGRO DANCES.
The Kolo Is a Feature of All Great
National Festivals.
The national dance of Montenegro is
the “kolo,” somewhat similar to the
“poro” of Bulgaria. Both sexes take
part, crossing hands and forming an
unjoined circle. The music they sup-
ply themselves, each end of the horn
alternately singing a verse in honor of
the prince and his warlike deeds. The
“kolo” is always danced at any great
national festival, and the effect of the
sonorous voices and swaying ring is
wery fine. Then there is another dance |
performed by four or five, usually |
youths, to the accompaniment of a
fiddle, the leader setting a lot of intri-
cate quick steps which the rest imi-
tate at once. It Is really a sort of jig
and makes the spectator's head swim
if he watches it for long.
1 never saw any dances in northern
‘Albania, though certaln Slav artists
love to depict wonderful sword dances,
with beauteous maidens swaying grace-
fully after the style of nautch girls,
A casual observer who has seen the
Albanians come into Montenegrin mar-
kets or to their great weekly gather-
ing In the bazaar of Scutari could
never picture these stern, lean men
dancing or at play. They never smile,
and they look the life they lead, each
clan ever ready for war with its neigh-
bor and absolutely pitiless in the ven-
detta. The red Indian is not more
stoical in his bearing than the north-
ern Albanian clansman.—Wide World
Magazine.
Kent and Burr.
James Kent, famous for his “Com-
mentaries on American Law,” was a
great admirer of Alexander Hamilton,
and when the great Federalist was
killed by Aaron Burr in a duel he be-
came the implacable enemy of the lat-
ter. One day long afterward when in
New York the judge saw Burr on the
opposite side of Nassau street. He
went across the street as fast as his
years would permit and, brandishing
his cane in Burr's face, shouted:
“You're a scoundrel, sir, a scoundrel,
a scoundrel!”
Burr proved equal to the emergency.
He raised his hat and bowed to the
ground and then said in his calmest
professional tone, “The opinions of the
learned chancellor are s!ways entitled
to the highest consideration.”
' The Deserter.
“Do you desire to have it under-
stood.” asked the judge, addressing the
lady who wanted the divorce, “that
your husband deserted you?’
“Yes, sir.”
“Please tell the court as concisely as
you can how he deserted you.”
“Pwo months after we had com-
pleted our wedding trip he scolded me
because he thought I was extravagant
in the matter of getting clothes, and I
went home to my people.”
“Yes. Proceed.”
“Well, I waited and waited and walit-
ed for him to come and beg me to re-
turn to him, and he never did."—Chi-
cago Record-Herald.
Eye For Business.
White—Why are yuu so anxious to
lend that friend a dollar whenever he
asks it? He only spends his money in
@rinks and cigars. Black—Oh, he al-
ways pays it back. White—But there
must be some other reason for your
ready generosity. Black—Well,* there
fs. He always spends half the money
on me.—Judge.
Not Guilty.
«young man,” said the serious per-
son, “don’t you realize that the love of
money is the root of al evil?”
“Well,” answerell the 'spendthrift,
“you don’t see me hanging on to mon-
ey as If 1 loved it, do you?"
Same Thing.
i “Don't court trouble.”
“No: court a girl and the rest will
take care of itself.”—Boston Herald.
i
|
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Old Manx “Banknotes.” bi
Speaking of the curious Manx bank- |
ing lore of the past, the Liverpool Pest
says that a singular state of affates
was exhibited in “the island” at tlie
2lose of the Napoleonic wars. Trade
was brisk, money was more freely ad-
ventured, and all sorts of private per-
sons began to issue notes. There was
no occasion whatever to have sterling
against them. All you had to do was
to get some one to take them and pass
them on. The fashion grew till even
the humbler traders issued card |
“promises to pay,” the values most in |
circulation being 5 shillings, a shilling
and even sixpence. Once an advo-
cate from Castletown went to Peel to
collect a judgment of £350 from the
coroner of Glenfaba. This worthy paid
him 2,704 card notes, many of them
worthless. They took several hours to
examine and count, and their trans-
port was an item of extreme difficulty.
Finally they were put into a big sack,
half shaken to one end and half to the
other, and the whole slung over the
back of a horse. The lather of the
horse, soaking through, spoiled nearly
half the cards!
Clearing the Atmosphere.
In his capacity of dramatic critic
Mr. J. Comyns Carr, the author, wrote
a notice of the play of “Charles 1,” in
which Irving played under the man-
agement of Mr. Bateman. His produc-
tion deeply incensed the manager. In
order perhaps to find the opportunity
of informing the critic of his disap-
proval, the manager invited him to a
supper at the Westminster club on the
second or third night of the produc-
tion. When he thought the fitting mo-
ment had arrived Mr. Bateman led the
conversation to the point at issue and,
emphatically banging the table with
his fist. declared in the loudest of
tones that he did not produce his plays
at the Lyceum theater to please Mr.
Comyns Carr. There was a moment's
awkward silence, which Mr, Carr con-
fesses he did not feel quite able to
break, but which was released by a
wit of the company with the happy re-
tort, “Well, dear boy, then you can't
{
be surprised if they don't please him.” clock.—Newcastle (England) Chronicle.
Sight Lost and Restored.
A farmer's wife who had bad much |
trouble with her servants was accosted |
by one of them. |
“I fear 1 shall not be able to work |
much longer. I think I am going
blind.”
“Why, how is that? You seem to |
get along pretty well with your work.” |
“Yes, but 1 can no longer see any |
meat on my plate at dinner.” |
The farmer's wife understood, and |
the next day the servants were served |
with very large and very thin pleces of |
meat.
“How nice!” the girl exclaimed. “My |
sight has come back. I can see better |
than ever.” i
“How is that, Bella?’ asked the mis-
tress. i
“Why, at this moment,” replied |
Bella. “I can see the plate through |
the meat.”—London Scraps.
{
|
His Passport.
On one occasion Gustave Dore, the |
artist, lost his passport while on a tour |
in Switzerland. At Lucerne he asked |
to be allowed to speak to the mayor. |
to whom he gave his name. |
“You say that you are M. Gustave
Dore, and I belleve you.” said the
mayor, “but.” and he produced a plece
of paper and a pencil, “you can easily
prove it.”
Dore looked around bim and saw
some peasants selling potatoes in the
street. With a few clever touches he
reproduced the homely scene and, ap-
pending his name to the sketch, pre-
sented it to the mayor.
“Your passport is all right,” remark-
ed the official, “but you must allow me
to keep it and to offer you in return
one of the ordinary form.”
i
Brutal Indifference.
«It seems since his marriage Jack
Thornley has developed into a perfect
brute.”
“You surprise me!
done?”
“Why, the other night while his
wife was regailing him with all the
particulars of that cholce Verifast
scandal she noticed that he seemed
very quiet. And what do you think!
He was sound asleep!"—Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
What has he
Nearing the Limit.
An old lady was going down in the
cage in a Cornish mine. She looked
with apprehension at the rope, and
asked the miner anxiously: “My man,
are you sure this rope is quite safe?”
“Well, mum,” was the cheerful an-
swer, “these ropes is guaranteed to
last exactly six months, and this ain't
due to be renewed till tomorrow.”-
Birmingham Mail
The Real Trouble.
“I'm afraid,” said the lady to a dl
minutive applicant, “that you are too
small to act as nursemaid to my chil-
dren.”
“Oh, I'm not too small,” replied the
applicant. “I guess the trouble is your
children are too large.”—Chicago
News.
“The Press Agent Proposes.
“Your pulchritude is peerless. You
are an astounding aggregation of fem-
nine faultlessness. Be mine!”
“Sure!” responded the girl. “I never
could resist that press agent lam-
guage.” —Louisville Courier-Journal.
Return of the Prodigal.
«ywho's that a-hollerin’ down yander
in the branch?’
wrhat's the prodigal son. The ol6
man's a-wallin' thunder out ¢’ him fer
sunnin’ away !"—Atlanta Constitution.
There is no wisdom like frankness.—
Beaconsfield.
| other stone at the end of the rope.
| The clock is still going after its cen-
Choosing a Builder.
The selection of a builder is quite as
fmportant a matter in putting up a
house as the choice of an architect
Don't choose the cheapest bullder
merely because he is cheapest. If you
accept his bid, find out the reason of
the cheapness. Frequently the bullder
a man of little means, and often he
tes on borrowed capital. Should
the builder become bankrupt or fail to
pay for his labor or materials the own-
, under the mechanics’ laws of most
Kare, becomes liable for the builder's
ebts. This is true even though the
owner has paid the builder for his
work. In order to obtain his house
free and clear in such a case the own-
er must meet the builder's obligations,
The prudent owner will, of course, pay
for his house only as it is constructed.
Even then it would be a useful caution
to make sure that the builder has paid
his indebtedness on the house. Pay- |
ments are usually made the builder
wlen the foundations are done, when
the frame is up, when the house is
closed, when the plastering is finished
and when the completed house is turn-
ed over to the owner.—Circle Magazine.
Antient Castle, Curious Clock.
Rushen castle, Castledown, Isle of
Man, is the ancient seat of the kings
and lords of Man. The castle is a veri-
table curiosity both historically and |
otherwise. The first mention of fit
dates to the year 1257. It was taken
after six months’ siege in the year
1315 by Robert the Bruce. The castle
is built of limestone and is not a ruin.
Until a few years ago it was used as a
prison. The town clock seen in the |
castle wall was presented by Queen |
Elizabeth in the year 1597. It has only
one hand on the dial. This is the hour
hand. The minutes are judged by the
position of the hand between the
hours. The works of this clock are
also a curiosity. The weight at the
end of the pendulum is a large stone,
and it is driven by a rope colled
around a cylinder of wood, with an-
turies of service and is still the town
Where She Got the Money.
They were at the circus. The conver-
sation ran to the subject of how they
had financed their admission ticket
projects. One said she had gathered
rags and sold them. Another had help-
ed her brother spade a garden. The
third member of the party presented
a sickly grin and seemed reluctant
about explaining where her half dollar
came from. An explanation seemed
absolutely necessary.
“Lizzle, whah yo' git dat half dol-
lah yo’ flipped up to de ticket man?’
“Nevah yo' mind. Yo' all saw me
pay de man, didn't yo'?" ’
“Sho 'nuf we did, but dat ain’ no
exp'anation.”
“Well, 1 got de money all right.”
“Sho' nuf yo' did. Sho’ nuf yo' did.”
Lyon & Co.
LYON
Claster's Clothing Store.
Claster’'s Clothing Store.
Cet The Habit
VAT AA TATA ATA
Why are thousands of people
getting the habit of dealing at
Claster’s Underselling Store?
Buying in large quantities from the largest manufac-
turers enables us to sell at a much lower price than what
other stores charge.
Selling strictly for cash you do not
need help pay for other peoples goods. Everything we sell
is guaranteed as represented. If not satisfactory, we ex-
change or refund the money.
“Yes, an’ ef I doan’ git a half dollah
somewhah an’ git my ole man's Sab-
bath shoes from dat pawnshop befo’
Satahday evenin’ I'm a deevo'ced
woman, dat's all.”—Indianapolis News.
East Indian Muslin Test.
A Madras physician was buying
muslin for a turban in a department
store.
“None of this is fine enough,” he
said. “In the turban I have on there
are forty yards. But forty yards of
this would give me a head like a sara-
toga trunk.
“Indian muslin is very, very fine. It
must be fine enough to disappear if it
is to pass our Al test. The test is
this: The muslin is spread on grass
overnight. In the morning, when ev-
erything is dew drenched, if the mus-
lin isn’t practically identical with the
dewy gossamer covering the lawns—in
other words, if it isn't invisible—it is
discarded and must be sold as ‘sec-
onds. ” — New Orleans Times-Demo-
crat.
Good Time to Go.
General Joseph E. Johnston, the
Confederate commander, used to re
late that in the hottest part of one of
the early battles of the civil war he
felt his coattails pulled. Turning about,
he recognized a young man who had
been employed in his tobacco factory
previous to enlistment,
“Why are you not in your place fight-
Lyon & Co.
& CO.
yard 10C
lines, Gloves, Hosiery,
reduction prices.
at $2.75 & $3.90.
must be sold now.
before you buy.
WE WILL CONTINUE OUR
Clearance
OF ALL SUMMER STUFFS.
Only a few items to show you the big money
saving you can do by buying here.
A large assortment of fine Organdies, all colors,
that sold at 2oc and 235c, now per yard roc
One lot Organdies, not so fine, thatsold at 1234¢
and 15¢, now per yard 8c
A large assortment of fine White Goods in stripe
and check, that sold at 15¢. and 20c., now per
We have no space to tell you of everything re-
duced, such as Dress Ginghams, Percales, Wool
Dress Goods, Silks, all the new shades in Messa-
Shirts and Summer Underwear, Summer Suits.
All Low Shoes in black, white and russet, at big
Ladies’ Washable Coat and Jumper Suits, in
white and colors, that sold at $5 and $6, now go
All Ladies’ Shirt Waists at closing-out prices—
We must have the room for our new Fall Goods.
It will mean a big saving to come into our store
SUMMER GOODS MUST BE SOLD NOW.
:- Sale
Underwear, Men's fine
47-12 Allegheny St.
LYON & COMPANY,
Bellefonte, Pa.
ing?” the general demanded angrily.
“Why, I just wanted to tell you that
Both Willing.
“He said he'd rather go to jail than
if you don't mind I will take my day | pay his divorced wife alimony.”
off today!”
To Sleep Like a Top.
To “sleep like a top” has probably a
“Did she let him go?"
“Yes: she said she'd rather see him
save his money behind the bars than
spend it over them.”—Cleveland Plain
very different origin from that which | pegjer,
appears. *“Top” is thought to be a cor-
ruption of the French taupe, or mole.
This interpretation is far more in ac-
cordance with the idea usually con-
ed sleep like that of a mole in winter
Precocity.
“Every time the baby looks into my
| face he smiles,” said Mr. Meekton.
veyed—that of a prolonged, undisturb-
“Well,” answered his wife, “it may
| pot be exactly polite, but it shows he
rather than the short, enduring 80 | hag a sense of humor.”—Exchange.
called “sleep” of a top when it re-
volves on its axis with a gentle, hum-
ming sound.
An Oversight.
“Took here,” exclaimed the angry
man as he rushed into the real estate
agent's office, “that plot I bought from
you yesterday is thirty feet under wa-
ter!” .
“pardon my oversight,” apologized
the gentlemanly agent. “We give a
diving suit with each plot. I will send
yours to you today.”
Oddly Expressed.
The following letter of gratitude for
services rendered appears in a London
publication: “Mr. and Mrs, Blank wish
to express thanks to their friends and
neighbors who so kindly assisted at
the burning of their residence last
night”
Hunger or Fame.
“It 1s a good thing to hunger for
fame.” remarked the struggling author.
“Yes,” assented his friend the artist,
“if you don't get the fame you are sure
to get the hunger.”"—Chicago News.
——Do yor know where to get the finest
teas, coffees aud spices, Sechler & Co.
Examine carefully every bottle of CASTORIA,
a safe and sure remedy for infants and children,
Bellefonte Shoe Emporium.
$1.48 A PAIR.
$2. WORKING SHOES
Reduced to $1.48
COME AND GET A
BARGAIN.
YEAGER’S SHOE STORE,
successor to Yeager & Davis.
Bush Arcade Building,
BELLEFONTE, PA.