i E Diemorraic Wada, ASSIS, — meme fre Bellefonte, Pa., Aprii 5, 1907. rm ———— THE DRUGGIST AND THE FOOTPAD. “Hist,” cried the stealthy footpad, as he knocked the druggist down; “Deliver up your wad at once before I crack your crown! You need not say you have no mun— I've watched an hour or more, and fifty people passed within, And then came out your door!” “Alas, sir,” wailed the druggist, as he rose with features pale, : “I pray you, Mr. Footpad, kindly listen tomy tale: Fall well I know that people do go in and out my place, But some come in for postage stamps, and some come in to face The mirror and adjust their hats, or borrow pen and ink, And some come in to ask the time and some come in to think. And some come in to meet their friends, and some their friends do bring To ask me for an almanac, or else a piece of string. And some come in to question where a certain esr to catch, While more come in to telephone or ask me for a mateh; And some to look up something in the street directo-ree, And some have nerve enough to try to borrow dough of me. And some come in to sit and hand out sage advice On how to run & drug store and treat the peo- ple nice. And some come in to rip me up and some to rip me down Because I closed at twelve one night when they stayed late in town. And some come in to tell a joke that I have heard before, And then because 1 don't ‘haw-haw’ they go away dead sore. And some come in to change a bill and then go out again, While some come in to warm themselves, or get out of the rain. And some—"" “Enough! Enough!" the robber said, “Yours is an awful calling, My life of crime has never met a story so ap- palling. Forgive that lamp upon your head made by my club descending, And take my purse—I feel condemued to think 1 came near ending ‘The life of one whose only work is every one Yefriending!" —Rawling's Drug News, A CHILDS VOICE. The baby got in at Madison Square. Not alone, of course, butcarried by an impas- sive German nurse, whose cap was rampant with starch. The baby was dressed dainsi- ly and fine, as a littie iady should be, and the people in the car looked up and smiled unconsciously. That started it ! For there is not a doubt in my mind that the baby saw the smile, and realized with what little effort she could capture all hearts, With the trae spiiit of conquest, she set to work with ber blandishments. She covered her tiny face with two little white- mittened hands, then slowly allowed her blue eyes to peek [rom over them. The eyes were sparkling with the joy of life, and knotted in the corners with a child's laughter-wrinkles, This was all for the benetit of the old gentleman on her right, who quickly capitulated and turned sideways to obtain a better view of her. He noded his head, Chinese fashion, and smiled crookediy,as if he hoped the other passengers would not see him. At this, the baby clapped her hands and laughed openly. Sure of her trinmph she wriggled about on the nurse's lap until she gn a good look at ber neighbor on the left. e also was an elderly man. At first he would have uone of her ! He drew out. a newspaper and began to read, but the baby made a lunge at it and brought away a fist fall of Wall Street news. There was some smothered langhter at this, and the second old gentleman folded the paper viciously and pnt it in his pocket. The baby thought that rather a nice game and tried to imitate him, bas if she bad a pockets she failed to find 1t, and with a be- witching little gesture she offered her neighbor his tattered Wall Street items, — possibly because she did not know what to do with them. Bat thats an ulterior thought ! We will try to believe that it was in reparation for baving torn his paper. Then, for the first time, old gentleman No. 2 took real notice of her. One glance and he, too surrendered. He held outa finger, which was quickly grasped and pump up and down to the tune of many gurgles. eanwhile, the first old gentieman kept up his voddiug, and the second old gentle- man joined in, and then, before they knew it, they were nodding to each other. Joe baby stiunded . has to each, at w mpartiality the er passengers made no farther attempt to hide their in- terest and enjoyment. Littlefield, who sas opposite the child, found her more fascinating than the top of his cane which, up to this time, be bad been contemplating in an absorbed way. Now he caught himself almost wishing oe would flirt with Aim. The conductor next claimed the little one’s attention. Little- field laughed outright at the wonder which grew in ber eyes as the harly fellow distrib- uted his transfers. She looked up into her nurse's face, evidently wondering why the woman did not take one, but the nurse kept her gaze fixed upon the windows be- fore her, no shade of expression of human- ity lighting ber featares. If, inwardly, she loathed the notoriety which her young charge counrted she Neyosige. Suddenly the , bending forward, beamed upon the entire car full of people, ered up the Wall Street soraps which soattered on the nurse's knees and, th a charming twinkle, bestowed several pieces on those pearest her. The old gentlemen each gravely took one, then, catch amute invitation in Listleield’s eyes, the ohild held out to him also of her own private transfers, which he J a Wk iu ““That’s a great kid !"’ Littlefield tarned. The man beside him was no less interested than he. “Yes,” he said. SDon's koow as I ever see one tu beat her I'” The man was evidently not a New Yorker. He might have come from any- where el¢e, west, south, east. His weather. beaten face had a droll expression, but a gentlenes® seemed to breathe from his big, uncouth frame. “She appears to have put everyone in 8 good humor,” said Littlefield, in a friendly | way. a t's your name, baby?’ asked the big man, leaning forward. “Yah— Yah!” The baby said this witha wink, as if she wanted him to know that what she told him was not quite the truth. “It sounds Persian,’’ laughed Littlefield. “Or Navajo,”’ pus in the stranger. Littlefield looked up quickly. Like all good newspaper men, he was ever on the trail of an odd character or the germ of a story. “You come {rom the Southwest?’ be asked. “Round there,”’ answered carefully. *‘Is this your first trip East ?’’ Littlefield put it boldly, as though there were no chance of the older man taking offence at his question. “Well—yes !"” He lonked Littlefield over rapidly, and seemed satisfied. ‘Will you tell me,’”’ he added, ‘‘what you New Yorkers do with all the flowers you bave ? Seems to me, I never see so many in all my life before !"’ “It is the great Easter display,’’ said the young man smiling; ‘‘the city isn’t always #0 gay as this, but you have happened upon us during one of our holidays. Pretty sight, isn’t is ?”’ “Yes,” answered the Westerner, ‘‘but what do you do with all the flowers ?"’ Littlefield thought for an instant. “Mostly’’—he said—*‘mostly—we—send them to our sweethearts !"’ “Will you send some to yours ?"’ The Westerner put the question with a quains smile which included the baby, and seemed to say, ‘‘We'll enjoy the joke to- gether, kid !”’ Littlefield laughed. ‘‘I’'m married.” be eaid. The other persisted. “Will you send some to your sweetheart 2’ The baby stopped swinging the first old gentleman’s watch and listened. “I told you—,’’ Littlefield began. “‘Isn’t your wife your sweetheart 2’ Littlefield looked over at the child, and something seemed to blur hefore him. Then the car came suddenly to a stop and the German woman stood up with the baby. The newspaper man glanced from the windows. They were at Forty-Second Street. He conld hardly believe that the youngster had heen in the car for a mile. The time bad flown. The two old gentlemen, as if ashamed of their frivolity, shrank in their seats and disdained to take further notice of each other. “By-by !"’sang the baby over the nurse's shoulder. There was not a person in the car who did not answer the sweet little childvoice. Some of them, only in their hearts, but most of them in conscious, stiff tones. Littlefield merely lifted his hat, then once more held communion with the head of his cane. When, finally pulling himself together, he glanced around the car, he found it singularly empty now that the child had left. “May I ask,”’ he said to the Westerner, “how much farther you are going ?"’ “Don't know! I’m just riding ’round !"’ “Then let us leave together!” Littlefield suggested, and started toward the door. He could hear the stranger following him. Once out in the street, they swung down Broadway. ‘Ain't we just passed here?'’ asked the older man, “Yes, but you couldn't see much from the windows.” The street was filled with people, the air rich with Spring warmth, and the wares of the florists,ovetflowing the shops, straggled gaily out to the very curbs. “What's the matter, voung feller?” asked the big man, suddenly, "did the kid ‘loco’ you om **Not exactly,’’ said Littietield. “Perhaps is was my question about your sweetheart. I ask your pmdon il it was, —it was none of my blamed business !"’ “What is your bosiness ?'’ asked Little- field, ignoring the first part of the speech. “Well, I haven’t any business here,” said the man. “I came on, God knows why, and I’m going back as quick as scat ! The plaivs ain’t in it for lonelinéss com- pared with this place !"’ “See here!” said Littlefield, with a rapid shavge of manner, “I'm going to tell yon something nota soul in the world knows. You'll think it odd, perbaps, my telling this to a stranger whom 1 met ten minutes ago in a public car. Bo% the man conldn’t have a face like yours if his heart wasn’t in the right place, and somehow, that kid has set me thinking!’ “Fire away !I"' »aid the Westerner. ‘Yon say you're lonely ! Man, you couldn't be as lonely as Iif you lived to be a hundred. Ihave a home,—you might call it that. My wile lives there too, but— we're almost strangers. We haven’s spoken in six months, except when we have visi- tors. We live our lives apart; but under the same roof, and I wonder if you can un- derstand how ghastly that is !”’ *‘It muss be the devil !"’ said the other man simply. ‘What happened ?"’ “Well, her sister died. There was a lit- tle baby left,—a nice enough oue, I sup: pose, though I bave never seen it. It's father was a pretty bad sort, an! disap- peared soon after the sister died, and has never come back. I felt sorry for the mother, bat I had never liked her. When she died and the father made off, my wile wanted to take the child,but I pus my foot down. She has made all ber arrangements without consulting me, and I didn’t like it. Ilost my head that afternoon, when we talked it over, and said some wild things I suppose. I spoke of her sister in a way she grew pretsy angry over, and said she should nos bring the baby into the house. I said I didn’t want her sister’s child there, nor—nor anyone else's child !"’ The men walked along fora little way in silence. “It was rough, wasn’t it ?"’ asked the stranger. “Brutal,” admitted Littlefield, ‘‘but the kid in the car seemed to change some- thing within me. I conldn’t help think- ing that if the sister’s child was like that one, it would make things sort of jolly, or it there was a little one of our own, the world aur be such a beastly lonely place after all. ““You’re all right,’’ said the other, kind- ly, ‘‘vou’re all right.” Then he asked, ““‘where is the child ?"’ ‘With some annt or other. I could find out in the directory !"’ Same tion then, and find out.” “I know,—but—'’ began Littlefield. “Quit your buttin,’’ said the Westerner, ‘‘yon’re on the right trail—atick to it.” 41 "Littlefield almost bashfully, *‘I thought I would send my wile some flowers now, and go after the baby tomorrow. It will be , you koow, and we can make some attempts at the holiday again.”’ Without more wordy; 3 he turned jos himself in the midst of glories such as be bad never dreamed of. the other “I don’t know much about these things, but I suppose you wouldn't object if I were to send her one ?"’ Listlefield put his band on the hoge shoulder. “She would like it,”’ he said. “Youn must know her. Will yod come and spend tomorrow with us?" “I'll see, I'll see!" Littlefield stood by the table while the salesman put a dozen American Beauty roses into a long box. Then he gave his wife's address. “Why don’s you carry them, and give them to her yourself 2°’ cried the Wester- ner. ‘‘Don’t vou think that's a pretty fashion ? That’s the way I used to do.” The big man bad such a deep voice, aud put all his questions in such a tentative manner ! “Well, yes,”” assented Littlefield, ‘‘only it isn’t the custom here.” “Oh, take them ! What do you care about costom ! Is isn’t the costom fora man and his wife to live as yon have been living.” It seemed absurd to Littlefield that he should he taking this man’s advice, and yet there was no reason why he should not,—exoeps on principle. “You need not send the roses,” he said, turning to the salesman, *'I'll just take them along with me.” The Westerner having bought a little basket of violets, the two once more went into the street. It was a silent walk, for the most part that brought them to Littlefield’ad welling. Perhaps in their hearts they were thinking of the simple, childish incident that had bronght them together from such distavt parts of the land, —one to tell his story of wounded authority, the other to give ina simple way conrage to undo the mischief caused hy a stormy heart. And the in. nocent canse of this chance acquaintance, —a mere scrap of a baby, whose tiny voice has prepared a way for peace, had gone serenely on her way without a thought. Littlefield’s home was, from the outside, a pretty little house, with a quiet, elegant nir which the stranger seemed dimly to realize as he stood gazing at it. Can von find yonr way tomorrow ?"’ asked Littlefield, one band on the stone railing of the stoop. “We'll be giad to see you.” he con tinned, ‘Rose and I,and—the baby.” The Westerner shook the other’s band with a warmth that =arprised Littlefield. “Thank yon, thank yon, he said, ‘‘but you'd better not have any strangers about tomorrow ! I'll drop in on my next trip East “No,” oried Littlefield earnestly, ‘‘vou must come tomorrow. I want you. Why, it’s a holiday, what would von do all hy yourself, like a stray oat ?"’ The stranger shook his head decisively. “I'll be thinking of you and wishing yon luck." “But how will yon spend the day ?" asked Littlefield, anxious for the big man’s welfare, The stranger grasped his hand again he- fore he finally turned away, and, langhing in hie deep, gentle way, he said : “I know it will be a wild goose chase, hut I'm going to try to find the hahy we met in the car today. No, I know there's not much chance of my succeeding, —hut I'm going to try ! Sort of thonght I'd like to end her some flowers—seeing it's Eas. ter.”’—By Claire Wallace Flynn, in the Delineator. A Dry Shampoo. People who are susceptible to colds, and who fear to wet their hair during the win ter months, will find a dry sham with orris, in conmection with brushing and | massage, very effective, | Ten cents’ worth of powdered orria is amply sufficient for two shampoos. When ready to retire, and after carefully brush. ing the hair, apply the ortis, rahbing it in well with the finger tips, then put on a cap or tie the head up in a towel and allow it to remain over night. The orris will ab. sorb the oil ard dirt from the hair and scalp daring the night, and can be broshed out in the morning. Orris is not only an effective shampoo, but a very agreeable one ; imparting a dis- tinct yet dainty evanescent odor to the hair. By its use the head and hair can be kept in a perfectly healthy condition, Fre- quent airing, brushiogs, and massagings will add to the beneficial results. Wiihon: Kindling Woad. According to a recent dispatch New York city is suffering from a kindling wood famine. Grocers all over the city say that they have not een the woodman for more than three weeks. The kindling wood is cut from Penussl- vania hemlock and Virginia pine. Dealers in the product say that the severe winter in Pennsylvania and the scarcity of freight cars are among the causes for the shortage. Auother reason is that Virginia woodmen are getting better prices for pine in the form of lumber for building purposes and are ignoring the fuel-wood trade. —— Beside their costliness, poultry and poetry have many points of resemblance. The hen is like the poet. who Will «is and think for balf a day, Then work a minute, maybe two, Aud there, behold, a lovely lay! The teacher a ed one little fellow who was present for she first time, and in- quired his name for the purpose of placing it on the roll. “‘Well,” said the youngster, ‘‘they call me Jimwie for short; but my maiden name is James. -—-‘‘My wife was rather worried when I left her this morning.” “What was the master?” she bad been worrying about or other yesterday evening, and this morning she couldn't remember what ‘Then you bave no sympathy for the deserving poot?’’ asked the person working for charity. ‘“‘Me?"’ replied the rich and great man. ‘‘Why, sir, I bave nothing but sympathy for them.” ——When the boarder passed up his coffee cup for a third helping the landlady icily remarked, ‘‘You must be very fond of coffee.”’” To which he replied, ‘‘I should think so, from the amount of water I have to drink to get any.” ——8he: Father consents to our mar- riage, but he wishes us to wait four years! 0, Carlo, don’t look like that, you will be still young as that time! He: My treasure, I was not thinking of myself. ———As long as Father retains any rights at all, he is pretty sure to remove his shoes out by the sitting room fire. Abvent-Mindid Man. “Iguess I bad the most absent minded man in the world in my chair this morn. ing,”’ said a Seventeenth street barber yesterday. “He came in and sat down near the door to wait his tarn. I velled ‘next’ as him two or three times when my chair was vacant, hut he was dreaming and dido’t bear me. Finally I touched him on the shonlder and told him I was ready for him. * ‘What do you want me todo? he asked. ** ‘Why, get in the chair if you want anything,’ I replied. ‘This is a barber shop’ “ ‘Oh, yes," he said, and then he got into the chair. He leaned hack so I let the chair down and shaved him. He didn’t have a word to sav. When I finished him up he got out of the chair and rook the check over to the cashier. He paid and started ont. When half way through she door he stopped. ** ‘Say,’ he said to me, ‘what did you do to me?" “I shaved yon,’ I said. “ ‘Darn the luck,’ he replied. ‘I wanted a haircut.’ Then he went ont scolding.’ Searcely one woman in a thousand really appreciates the fluence of her sexual or- ganism over her whole life. It is only the gkilled physician who has time and again traced disease hack along the delicate nerves to the sensitive womanly organs, who understands how closely related are these organs to every healthy function and attribute of the body. Women who have used Dr. Pierce's Favorite Prescription for diseases of the delicate organs understand the remarkable relief given to overstiung nerves, It cures irritability, hysteria. de- pression, spasms and various other forms of nervous divease hecanse these originate in a diseased condition of the delicate womanly organs. ‘‘Favorite Prescription” is a special remedy for woman's special ail- ments, It makes weak women strong and gick women well. Don't Develop the Mind at the Expense of the Body. The man or woman who would train the mental faculties without any refer- ence to the physical shows a faulty qualification for the work in which he or she may be engaged. The mind may be ever so well trained and stored with knowledge of the books, but un- less there is behind it a reasonably strong body life runs the risk of be- ing a failure; if not that, an existence of pain that serves as a limitation upon its possibilities. It is a species of cru- | elty to educate the mind at the ex- pense of the body. Better let a child | grow up into manhood or womanhood | with an inferior education than with | a better education of the mind and a body weakened in the effort. The fact that so many men in this country who have succeeded in busi- ness snd in professional and public | life have been the sons of farmers, whose early life has been spent out of doors, has heen a subject of remark. May it not be accounted for on the ground that in their boyhood thelr | physique was developed so that in aft. | er life, besides their mental acquire- | ments, they had strong bodles with | which to do the work they have so | successfully performed? This Is not! only possible, but very probable.— Knoxville Journal. A Stolen Trade Secret. The manufacture of tinware in kEng- land originated in a stolen secret. Few ! readers need to be informed that tin- ware is simply thin sheet iron plated | with tin by being dipped into the molt- | en metal. In theory it is an easy mat- ter to clean the surface of iron. Dip | the iron in a bath of boiling tin and | remove it enveloped in the silvery met- | al to a place of cooling. In practice, | however, the process is one of the most | difficult of arts. It was discovered in | Holland and guarded from publicity with the utmost vigilance for nearly | half a century. England tried to dis- | cover the secret in vain until James Sherman, a Cornish miner, crossed the channel, insinuated himself surrepti- | tiously into a tin plate manufactory, made himself master of the secret and brought it home. Women and Jewelry. : “Women know a great deal more about buying jewelry now than they | knew twenty-five years ago,” said a | jeweler. “When I first started in the | business a clerk with a persuasive | tongue could talk a woman into buy- | ing most anything. It wasn't safe for her to step inside a shop unless she had a man along. Now the average woman knows more about jewels than | the average man. Of course they can | be fooled—anybody can but an expert —but as a rule she buys with a sur- | prising knowledge of value, and her | taste in the cutting and setting is ex- cellent.”—New York Post. | Brains. “A man stood on his head twenty minutes in order to win a wager. He died the next day.” “What killed him? Congestion of the brain?” “No; if he had had any brains he wouldn't have dome it.” — Cleveland Plain Dealer. Specified. “When in trouble,” said the eminent lecturer, “refrain from worrying.” “But, doctor,” asked a woman in the audience, “bow can we?” “Anyway,” replied the lecturer, “re- frain from worrying other people.” Worse Still, She—You'll be glad to learn, dear, that I've got out of visiting rela- tives. He—Grand! Splendid! Ithung over me like a soul. How you manage it? She—Oh, I them here!—Life. Moeting the Situation. “1 wonder if there's iE : apap there has had the bos of all her a gende BI , | RA PACIFIC LUMBER RAFTS. “luge Log Piles That Are as Large as Ocean Steamers. Nearly as large as the largest trans- atlantic liners are some of the huge sea rafts by means of which timber is transferred from the Columbia river and Puget sound to San Francisco or southern California. Occasionally these bundles of logs ‘measure G50 feet from end to end and contain as many as 5,000 pieces of timber. To fasten such pr raft so that it will withstand the force of the seas to which it is exposed in the trip down the coast no little en- gineering skill is required. As the cigar shape offers less resistance to the force of the waves than any other, this has been adopted. In order to pile the timber in this form a huge skele- ton or shipway is constructed. This is practically a cradle, which is moor- ed in the water adjacent to the boom where the raft timber is confined. By means of a boom derrick the poles and piling are lifted from the boom singly and placed in the proper position in the cradle. They are so adjusted as to overlap each other, the plan follow- ed being somewhat similar to that in laying a brick wall, the end of each stick being placed opposite the center of the one adjacent to it. While to a novice the raft looks as if it were made up of timber thrown in without any order, every pole is carefully placed in position. Sometimes the work of filling the cradle occupies several months, After completion the raft is wrapped with iron chains lashed around it at intervals ranging from twelve to twen- ty feet apart. These chains are com- posed of one and a half inch links, and the ends are toggled together after the chains have been stretched taut by a hand or steam windlass. To prevent the chains from slipping iron staples are driven through the links into the outside poles. In addition to the chains, however, “side lines,” as they are called, consisting of wire rope, are stretched around the raft between the chain sections, so that when the wrap- ping is completed the mass of logs is bound together very securely. When the wrapping is finished, the raft is ready for launching. In building the raft two two-inch shains are stretched lengthwise from 2nd to end through the center. One of these is bolted to a sort of bulkhead at one end, consisting of a band of iron, | which is fitted around the projecting ends of the outer pieces. The other {chain is connected at the forward end with the towing hawser and secured inside the raft by lateral chains. To move this unwieldy bulk two powerful steamers are usually employed at sen, one for pulling directly ahead and the other to keep the raft in the right course, —(C'hicago News, Pure Salt. The purity of salt depends upon the source from which it is obtained and the sanitary conditions under which it is preparxd for the market. The sup- ! ply of common salt, the”most indis- pensable of all the seasoning sub- stances both as a relishing condiment and a well nigh universal food preserv- ative, is exhaustless, yet even so there is salt and salt. PPormerly salt was obtained by evaporating ocean water, a process that left many impurities in the residuum, to say nothing of its ex- posure to all kinds of dirt in its ship- ment from seaports. The Turk's island or rock salt, which is still largely used in pork packing and in the manufac- ture of ice creams, comes to the Unit- ed States in holds of vessels contin- ually subjected to dirt and foul odors. Upon its arrival it is again handled, then packed in coarse burlap bags, per- mitting dust to sift into the salt. In this condition it reaches the consumer. Latterly, however, the product of salt springs has largely taken the lead in this country, not only for table salt, but for meat packing.—London Pie- i torial Review. A Magazine of Famous Editors. One of the most interesting of peri- odical adventures in the first quarter of the last century was the establish- ment of the Liberal, a literary journal planned by Lord Byron in Italy con- jointly with Shelley and Leigh Hunt, who were then with him there, but to be published in London, with Hunt as editor. The consultation took place at Leghorn a week before Shelley was drowned in the gulf of Spezia. The Liberal was started in the summer of 1822, but only four numbers were is- sued, the first of these containing By- ron’s great satire, “The Vision of Judg- ment,” two years before the poet's death. Leigh Hunt had ten years ear- lier set out on his journalistic career in the Examiner, established by his brother, in which appeared some of his most noteworthy sonnets. His most important writing was in the Indi- cator, in the Companion and in the Talker, “a daily journal of literature and the stage,” lasting during two years and written almost entirely by himself.—H. M. Alden in Harper's. Chopin's Superstition. Chopin, unlike most musical geniuses, was a late riser. He practiced so long at the piano, with his back unsupport- ed, that his spine was permanently in- jured. He never composed except when seated at the piano, and he always had the lights turned out when he was im- provising. A public audience unnerved him to such an extent that he could not properly interpret the music before him. Seated in the midst of a small select circle, he easily extemporized and improvised. He “talked” to his pin: whenever he was melancholy. He thought more of his manservant and his cat than he did of his intimate friends. Chopin had a superstitious dread of the figure seven and would not live in a house bearing that num- ber or start upon a journey on that date. | MUSIC AND SHORTHAND. Two Lines of Work That Are Particu- larly Bad For the Eyes. A St. Louis oculist, chatting with friends about the ins and outs of his profession, said that there were two lines of work which for professional * reasons both the oculist and the op- tician would be glad to see widely en- couraged. One is music, particularly plano playing. “Have you ever noticed,” said he, “that the pianist’s head as he sits up- right at the plano is generally almost three feet from the music? He reads at long range. This of itself is bad, Involving as it does a continual strain upon the eyes. If the pianist only sat still, however, the casé would not be so bad, but very few do. In executing difficult passages or extended scales they sway first to one side, then to the other, sometimes a foot in each direction, lean back six inches, then toward the music, all the time keeping their eyes fixed upon the notes, and during all the changes of distance and direction the delicate mechanism of the eye is constantly seeking to adjust it- self to the distance so as to obtain the clearest possible image of the notes. The result is, of course, an overstrain, and it is a common thing when the practice hour is over to see the mu- sician rub his eyes and to hear him re- mark that music is bad for the eyes, anyhow. It is not good, indeed, for, although in ordinary piano sheet music the notes are large enough, the signs of expression are often so small as to cause an effort to see them properly, and, besides, much piano playing, par- ticularly of the standard classics, is done from small size editions, which are to be had at much cheaper rates than sheet music. “Shorthand work and typewriting are as bad for the eyes in their way as music. Most stenographers write with a medium pencil and in small characters. The dots and dashes are thus hard to decipher and themselves strain the eyes. Then comes the tran- scription, which is worse. If stenog- raphers would only learn to use a type- writer as a pianist does the keyboard— that, is, to write without looking at the keys—the eye strain would not be so severe, but very few of them acquire this degree of confidence and proficien- cy, so the focus of the eye is always changing, first reading the notes, then dancing back and forth over the keys, then looking at the typewritten page and repeating these processes all day long until the wonder is not that their eyes are bad, but that they don't go stone blind, If pianists would learn to sit still while they are playing and stenographers would acquire the art of using a typewriter without looking at the keys, the demands on the time of the oculist and the services of the op- tician would be lessened very materi- ally, but as it is these two classes are a great help both to the specialists and to the man that makes spectacles, fur- nishing more business than any one would suppose who is not in the pro- fession.”—8t. Louis Globe-Democrat. A Tombstone Lunch. The waiter in the indigestion dispen- sary, towel in hand, gazed with refiec- tive eye at a corpulent victim consum- ing a midnight repast of lemonade and an egg sandwich and unburdened his speculative mind thus: “If I was a kid again, I'd go to college and learn to be a doctor, even if I did bave to work my way through. ‘Cause why? Well, there's more money and respectability, to say nothing of peace of mind, in curing dyspepsia than in making it. See what the gent's eating? Well, that ain't a fair sample. Some of ‘em comes in here and orders lobster salad and chocolate, and for dessert they pull out a little box and eat a dyspep- sia tablet. I used to have a yourg fel- ler come in every night and eat what he called a tombstone lunch. It was a Welsh rabbit made on mince pie fu- stead of toast. He don't come any more, though. He's dead.”—Philadel- phia Record. The Baron's Order. A worthy Welsh baronet, a member of one of the parliaments of William IV., was asked by one of his constitu- ents who chanced to be in town at the time for an order of admission into the house. With his characteristic disposi- tion to oblige, Sir —— immediately complied with the request and wrote an order in the usual terms and ad- dressed it thus: “To the Door Ceeper of the House of Kommons.” The per- son for whom it was intended discov- ered the errors in the spelling after he had gone ten or twelve yards from the worthy baronet and, turning back and running up to him, said: “Oh, Sir —, there is a slight mistake in your order. Two letters have been transposed. You have spelled ‘keeper’ with a C instead of a K and ‘commons’ with a K in- stead of a C.” “That's all right,” was the answer. “The doorkeeper see to it. He is sure to know which is which.” Washington's Advice. Here is a bit of advice given by George Washington on Jan, 15, 1873, to his young nephew, of whom he was very fond: “Be courteous to all, but intimate with few, and let those few be well tried before you give them your con- men any make fine birds. A plain, genteel dress fs more admired and obtains more credit than lace and embroidery in the | eyes of the judicious and sensible.”