ae
Bellefonte, Pa., December 14, 1906.
————————————————————————————————————————
A BUSY DAY.
My papa has a little sign,
Printed in black and gray;
It's only just a single line—
“This Is My Busy Day!”
And sometimes when I ereep to look,
He's writing with a pen;
Or quietly reading io a book—
He calls that busy then!
Why, when I'm busy I just race
Downstairs; then, like as not,
I fly back tothe other place
For something I forgot!
Then I slide down the banisters,
And from the porch I spring
(Perhaps 1 tumble in the burrs),
Then go and take a swing.
And then I race Jack Brown to town,
Or climb the garden wall;
And though I'm sure to tumble down,
Nobody minds a fall,
Bat if I sit still in a chair,
it wouldn't be my way
To say, with such important air,
“This Is My Busy Day!"
— Carolyn Wells, in St. Nicholas,
THE ELVES BUSY WORK.
*Tis said elves thought a lack of time
Could be the only reason
The autumn leaves were not all curled
Before the Jack Frost seasou,
And so all felt that duty called
To them to help the bending,
And get each leaf in autumn shade
Before to earth descending.
They climbed the trees and tried to give
Each leaf a little turning,
But many, many floated down
While they their task were learning.
Then back they'd climb and work at what
They thought to be their duty,
Until no leaf remained uncurled,
And autumn lost its beanty,
They worked so fast and recklessly
That every other minute
Down came a leaf, toboggan-shaped—
A merry elf within it.
1 know not if this all be true;
To see the elves I'm trying,
The leaves float down, and some are curled.
While autumn winds are sighing.
~—A. 8 Weber in October St. Nicholas,
A TRUE STORY.
How many of the readers of this story
have ever owned a Newfoundland dog?
I know of no more faithful animal.
My youngest brother and the dog who is
the hero of my story were born on the
same day. For this reason the little pup-
py was presented to my brother when both
were a year old,
At that time my father lived in a very
large, old-fashioned house in a small Cana-
dian town.
The place was originally settled by re-
tired British officers who, baving brought
their families over from England, were liv-
ing in and aroand the town, making a de-
lightfal social cirele within so small a com-
munity.
The ¢nrrounding country was mostly
farm land, the farmers caltivating the soil
principally for pasturage, each wan own-
iug many head of cattle and numbers of
sheep.
Constant complaints were being made by
these farmers thas the dogs of the town
were worrying their cattle, but little atten.
tion was given to their complaints until,
one day, a farmer whom my father held in
high esteem came to tell him that our
“‘Rover,”’ who kad now grown from a pup-
py toa very large, beaatiful animal, had
killed several of his sheep.
Sorry as my father was to hear this, he
did not for one moment believe that Ro-
ver was really the culprit.
Alter some conversation with the farmer,
the matter was settled by my father pay-
ing him the value of the sheep that had
been killed, and promising to keep a striot
watch over Rover's movements,
My brother and I were very indignant
when told of the accusation; for, loving our
dog as we did, we felt him to be quite in-
capable of such a deed.
e trouble was soon forgotten, howev.
er, and in our rambles through the woods
the dog was always with us. Indeed, we
were almost never seen abroad without
him. My fatheralwaye had a feeling of
safety when Rover went along, especially
as the shore of the Otonahee river, which
flowed by the lower part of our large gar-
den, was our favorite playground.
Rover was a splendid swimmer, and had
any accident befallen either my brother or
myself, he would bave proved himself quite
as useful as any human being.
Oue of his peculiarities be worth re-
cording, although it has ly nothing to
do with my story. Oo every week-day, as
800u as we appeared on the veranda, Ro-
ver was always in readiness to accompany
us on whatever jaunt we bad in ming for
that day; but on Sunday be seemed to re-
alize that our walk to church did not in.
clude him, and so he remained dozing
throughont the entire morning.
One day, as we were return from one
of our rambles, we saw our coming
toward ns, looking very solemn; and to
our great amazement we heard that Rover
was again in d oe
This time the rwould not be ree.
onciled with payment. He demanded that
the dog should be killed or sent away.
Oar sorrow knew no bounds, for we re-
alized that we and our friend most be
parted.
It was suggested that Rover should be
sentaway for the summer months only,
and that as soon as the sheep were housed
in their winter quarters he might return to
us.
The plan was to lend him to a lomber-
wan, living about twenty miles from our
home, who, baving a large family, would
be more than to accept the dogas a
household rdian while be was away
timber in the forest.
We knew this lnmberman would be a
er would be well
taken care of, and that if we persisted in
keeping him with ug, he might eventually
loge his life; for the law allowed that any
animal doing an injury to property might
be put to death.
one day two sorrowful children said
good-bye to their beloved companion.
Rover was tied behind the stage that
passed our house twice a week, and the
YEipeariver ised to be good to him
to leave him at the home of his new
All that day and the two days following
we wandered about, feeling very lovely.
Everything seemed dreary without oor
companion.
On the eveniug of the third day alter
Rover's departure we were just saying
good-night when, suddenly, a bark and a
soratch at the front door brought a loud ex-
clamation from us both—for whose bark
was shat if not Rover's! :
Yes, there he was, our beantiful dog!
Twenty miles he had traveled to reach his
old home and friends. i
What a bappy reunion it was; Such
bones as we begged of the cook! No dog
fared better than did our Rover that night.
My father #aid nothing, although at the
time we did not notice his silence; and lit-
tle we dreamed how short-lived our happi-
pess was to be.
Early next morning we were up -and
planning all sorts of fan. Rover, in spite
of his long ran of the day before, seemed
ready for everyting. ;
1 think it was late in the afternoon of
the same day, as we were returning from
the boat-honse, where Rover, my brother,
and I bad been playiog, that we heard my
father calling the dog.
Off Rover bounded in answer to the call;
and as we neared the gate we saw a man,
seated in a carriage, iu deep conversation
with my father. -
Then it dawned upon us what it all
meant. Again Rover mast go!
My father got into the carriage; and off
he and the mau started, Rover running un-
der the wheels in obedieace to my father’s
whistle.
Ob, how we Seiad as iy Nace Ye oar
T disappearing in thed ce! We felt
Hage diva to be a ead place indeed!
The days came and went, however, and
gradually we grew reconciled to our loss—
perhaps my brother and I became greater
chums, having no third companion to share
our fun. At all events, we began to think
less and less about Rover and to enter into
everything with the usual happiness of
childhood.
On Sunday morning, ahout ten days
later, my brother, who, after we returned
from morning service, had been sitting
quiet and in a listening attitude for some
minutes, suddenly disa| , and pres-
ently we heard him calling us from the
garden to come quickly.
What could it be? we wondered, as
again he called to us. Through the large
French windows and down the garden
path we hastened toa clump of trees from
which, as we neared it, a faint meaning
also was heard.
There we found wy brother kneeling on
the ground, and beside him, licking his
band, was our Rover!
Around the dog's neck was a strong iron
heavy block to which he bad been fasten.
ed. His coat was covered with burs which
stuck to his long black hair, making him a
pitiable object to behold. His poor back
was cruelly scarred where the chain had
rubbed away the hair, and his glossy black
coat looked like a dusty covering.
So tired and weak was the dog that all
be could do was to lick cur hands instead
of giving she joyous bark which he was
wont to welcome us with.
It was nearly hall an hour before we
were able to remove the chain and heavy
weight which he bad dragged eo far in his
frantic efforts to reach his home and
| Iriends; and after giving him the food of
| which he was so sorely in need, and mak-
ing him as comfortable as we could, we
left him to rest.
The bars bad to be removed so gently
kthat, knowing the poor dog bad suffered so
much already, we decided to wait until
the following day before giving bim far-
ther pain.
S80 1» we went to talk over our dog's
brave act with our parents.
We found our good father, quite over-
come hy the dog's faithfulvess, waiting to
tell us that Rover sbould not he sent
awav again. :
The arrangement was that we were to
try once more giving hiw his freedom, and
if at any time he attacked the sheep, then
he was to be chained at all hours when we
were not able to be with him.
Perhap# Rover knew the reason of his
punishment. or had learned his lesson
through suffering; for, from that day until
his death at the age of fourteen years, we
never heard another complaint about him.
And no wonder!
For, «ix months later, as my brother and
I were playiog in the garden one morning,
we saw walking toward us the farmer
whom we had come to look upon as a per-
sonal enemy.
In one arm heocarried a little lamb, and
in hia hand a queer looking box, between
the bars of which peered a pair of bright
eyes.
The box contained a rabbit—a present
for my hrother, aud the pet lamb was for
me.
Fora few moments my brother and I
quite forgot our old-time resentment.
The farmer had come to effect a recon-
ciliation.
In the first piace, he wanted to tell us
that the real culprit had been found; and,
secondly, he wished to give us each a
ring, and to ask us to forgive his
suspicions of Rover.
dear old dog, as he watched us, did
not appear to be at all surprised.—By
Ka ne Clarke, in St. Nicholas.
Queer Tastes of the Eskimo.
The Eskimo, as your geographies wiil
tell you, are the natives of that cold deso-
late country called Greenland, far up in
the ioy North. If you have read about
them in your books, you will have
learned that their clothing
consists chiefly of the frozen flesh of the
seal, walrus and reindeer, which is eaten
raw. :
Because they live in such a cold climate,
and fat isa heat produciag food, they eat
a great deal of blabber, which is the name
ven. to the fat of whales. Reindeer tal-
ow is their finest aeliensy,
g
however,
‘| the Eskimo children eat Fu as Ameri-
cap children eat candy. It is pat upin
litle made ous of the bright red
Eskimo women out off the fees of
which the men have killed, tak
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chain and to that chain was attached the |
—————
What Do The Birds Katt |
In order to determine the harmful or
beneficial relations of birds to agriculture,
horticulture, and all plant life, a remark-
ahle work is being carried forward hy Prof.
F. E. L. Beal, who is in charge of the Divi-
sion of Economic Ornithology of the Biolog-
jcal Survey, United States Department of
Agriculture, at Washi » D.C. Prol.
Beal has alone examined over thirty thous-
and bird stomachs, the greatest work of the
kind ever accomplished by a single man,
while his assistants have examined an equal
number, making over sixty thousand in all.
A seemingly endless task it is, iuvestigat-
ing witha m each minute pai-
ticle in each of these thousands of stomachs,
yet all this has been accomplished in a
period of seventeen years. When one con-
siders that to do this intelligently and sue-
cessfully requires a thorough knowledge of
the anatomy of hogs and insects, aud a
familiarity with characteristics of the seeds |
of both domestic and wild plants, the labor
assumes formidable proportions to the wo. |
inicated. To increase their knowledge, |
workers io this line must spend much time |
in woods, mardens, and fields, studying |
hundreds of species of insects, worms and |
bugs. The result of these investigations, |
which are invaluable to science, and
greas practical importance to the American |
farmer, have led to a movement that can
intelligently favor the increase of such |
bird species as are best adapted to preserve |
the proper balance of nature, and reduce
the number of those who prey too greatly
on the products of orchard and field. Or-
nithologists from all parts of the conntry,
and in many instances special field agents
who have heen engaged for the purpose,
forward great numbers of bird stomachs to
the department, and thas aid io the prac-
tical and scientific research.
It is difficult, almost impossible to de-
termine what a hird eats by his actions, as
he frequently goes through all the motiovs |
of eating a bearty meal withont taking a
thing. The *‘proof of the pudding’ is
found in the bird’s stomach. If he is load-
ed with garden seeds, cultivated froits, or
beneficial insects (parasites on other in-
sects, ) he in relegated to the black list;
but if examination reveals a goodly num-
ber of bugs, worms, and insects that are
injurious to plant life, he is hoisted high
upon the estal of usefulness, and woe
betide the human who does him bodily in-
injory, or tries to hesmirch his character.
The contents af a bird's stomach consist
of a pulverized, soggy mass, and it is nec-
essary to separate and stndy each minate
particle in order to determine to what spe-
cies of frit or insect he belongs. Cater-
pillars are sometimes recognized by their
skins, always by their jaws, and the tioy
chitinous plates that surround the hreath-
ing holes. The presence of ants and wasps
is discovered by the hard thorax, spiders
by their mandibles, and sometimes by their
eyes, which sparkle in the stomach mass
like rubies. Angle worms have bard, in-
digestible spicules, which project from their
sides. Beetles have fierce bony jaws, grass.
hoppers hard mandibles and tiny leg-armor
plates, and so on through the entire insect
world. The greatest diffionlty is experi-
enced in determining the species of fruit
found in stomachs. Usually it is crushed,
and, if it coutaine no seed, the only meth-
od of examination available for the inves.
tigators is to place particles of skin under
a microscope and discover the texture.
Grain ean be recognized hy the shape of the
Starch granules when the other methods
ail.
‘Most astonishing things have heen
found in the stomachs of birds, everything
but diamonds,’’ says Prof. Beal. “A bird
stomach which had been kept in aleohol
for two years, waiting its turn to be ex
amined, contained poison oak berries,
which are the favorite food of many birds,
The man who examined this stomach was
hadly poisoned. Vicious and deadly-poi-
#on spiders constitute a favorite bird food.
The mere touch of a blister beetle wonld
scorch the flesh of a human, yet in the
stomach of one king bird, fourteen of these
fiery creatures were discovered. Ceterpil-
lars with stinging spines, beetles with ac-
rid secretions that are bitter and burning,
buge with an odor so fierce that a skunk is
fragrant in comparison, and fruit bitter
aud asping a4 quinine, and thousands of
other obnoxious things, are consumed
greedily by the feathered throng.”
While sojourning in some localities, cer-
tain species may do inestimable damage to
crops, after which they migrate to other
fields, where they charm with their sweet
music, their good nature,and their innocent
and barmless demeanor. For instance, the
bobolink ravages the rice fields of the
South, annually destroying millions of dol-
lars’ worth of rice; then, as if remorsetul,
he wings his way to the North, where he
is thoroughly well-behaved, where, with
his sweet voice, immaculate decorum, and
his propensity for eating bugs and other in-
sects injurious to crops, he earns an en-
viable reputation. Bus after the fashion of
“Jekyl and Hyde,” his methods change
with abruptness, and he becomes an in-
carnate fiend when be returns te the south-
ern rice fields. So great a pest is he to the
planters, that in one season 2,500 pounds
of gunpowder were used on one plantation
in an attempt to reduce his numbers.
After examining hundreds of linnet
stomachs, the investigators have passed the
verdict that this bird is an abomivable pest,
with but few redeeming qualities. He
ignores insects that are injurious to plant
life, and gleans his living by robbing the | la
wealth of orchard and Bald, He works
with systematic evergy iating trees
i frait, and soratobing Wp at, De
or hy well-groomed e , but
be is wioked, d 2ll the. bed panes
him. Birds
found the mandibles of n
that these birds are to such
food. ns s.eal fruit with a vengeance,
| pecking boles in the ripe [iuit.
| low-hellied wookpeckers, indigenous to the
epartment suggests that wild
planted in close proximity to or-
chards, so that birds may be attracted and
out of mischief. As many of these
wild growths are ornamental, the advaot-
aes of baving them about would be dou-
Woodpeckers are both barmful and use-
ful. The good they do is in excess of the
injury. Flickers thrive on ants. In a
single stomach were found five thousand
of these little pests. The ants best liked
by the flickers are those that befriend plans
lice, carrying them from ove growth to
avother, as each becomes defoliated. The
red bellied woodpecker, common in the
notth of Pennsylvania, cavses some dis-
turbance iu the orange groves of Florida by
The yel-
northern part of the United States and the
Allegheny mountains, have au exasperat-
ing trick of girdling trees, and pecking
holes in the tranks in order to obtain a sap
thas exndes [rom the bruises. They also
eat insects that become nuprisoved in the
glutinous sap.
On expanding leaves and flower buds
plant lice accumulaie, and most of the
warblers perform a work of benevolence
for the farmer hy going over orchards
systematically, aud gleaning the offensive
aod destiuative insects. They are indefa-
tigable insect exterwivators, aml are of
great value to the world of agricultore.
Meadow larks aud cuckoos are helplal, and
have no black marks against their names
in the ornithological records. The worst
insect euemies of the frait grower are cat-
erpillais, cankerworms, fall webworms,
tussock moths, auld cockliog moths, All
these creatures the cuckoos dispose of with
gosto and dispatch. Few other birds will
eat the hairy caterpillars, because the stiff
hairs pierce the inver lining of moss bird
stomachs, and produce discomfort. But
the caockoe experiences no bad results,
though sometines his stomach is complete-
ly farred with these hairs. As the food
rotates in the stomach, these hairs are
brushed round and round like the silk nap
of a silk hat. In the stomach of one cuckoo
the remains of two hundred and fifty tent
caterpillars were found. Bashtits and
other small birds are found invaluable for
ridding orchards of scales and minute in-
# ects tbat destroy the value of crops. The
microscopic eyes of these birds detect the
tiniest insect eggs and every species of life,
and they perform tasks in insect extermi-
nation that would he impossible for man.
It is said they can he attracted to orchards
by hangiog meas on trees.
Hawks and owls are usefal to orchard-
ists, for they prey on gophers, ground
squirrels, field mice, rabbits, and many
other rodents that do great mischief in
girdling trees and stealing seeds. True,
these birds sometimes feed ov small birds
and poultry, hut their chief food con-
sists of harmful rodents. This was
proved by examining two hundred and
seventy stomachs, Out of the seventy-
three species of these birds to be found in
the United States, only six were found to
be really harmful. Some States have of-
fered bounties on hawks aod owls, while
rabbits are allowed to go their mischievous
way unmolested. Rabbits are found to be
of more harm to farmers than they are of
value as food. Owls and hawks are help-
fal, and it bas been suggested that the
bounty be placed on the head of the erring
rabbit, and removed from those of the en-
terprising birds.
Destruction of Man.
The golden eagle has few natural ene.
mies, and when free from human interfer.
ence usnally maintaine 1ts numbers. It is,
however, very easily trapped, taking sheep,
deer or rabbit bait most readily, but at-
tracted by almost any kind of carcass, and
#0 unsuspicious and eager for a meal that
often several may be caught successively at
the samc place by the same bait.
In fact it frequently walks into snares
set for other things; and Mr. E. 8. Camer-
on states tnat in Montana some years ago
the traps laid for woives all but extermin-
ated the golden eagle over a large area, [It
is not easy to shoot, being exceedingly wa-
ry ander most circumstances.
It is furthermore apparently not affected
by poisoned hait, and there is lacking defi- | ed
nite data to show that such means wonld
be efficacious in its destruction,
The Indians prize the wing and tail feath-
ers for their war bonnets, and kill the ea-
gle whenever opportunity offers.
In some sections, particularly in Califor-
nia, it suffers to no little extent from the
raids of egg collectors—all the more from
its habit of returning each year to the same
locality.
In some European countries bounties are
paid for the destruction of the golden ea-
gle, bat in many states of the Union, and
in some of the provinces of Cavada, it is
now protected along with the bald eagle.
Its general extermination is by no means
to be recommended, for in places where it
does damage it usually may be kept in
check by local means.
New Spelling's Death Knell
Bold defiance was hurled at the Presi-
dent's spelling reform order'by the House
A priations Committee, when it report-
the Legislative Appropriation bill, con-
taining a strict prohibition of the use of
any other than the Webster standard of
spelling inall documents authorized by
w
The President may write his message
phonetically aud send is to the Govern-
ment Printing office. But Public Printer
Stillings would have to ‘‘set it up’ in ac-
cordance with the old-fashioned way.
published by
printing office will be orthodox. The only
prin} not affected will be that of the
ve Departments. There are little
DE ote: wi Sho Pes oten:
aural Departments, n -
al Library. These are under the control
of the Executive, bat it is not believed the
new style will prevail even in these shops.
hy passing this provision, will
almost extingnish the Roosevelt attempted
reform.
There is joy in the House because of the
action of the committee. This is the first
t, | emphatic protest registered by the legisla-
tive against the usurpation of the
Executive power hy President Roosevelt.
“We don’t propose to have the Presi-
dent choke a pew down our
throats,” said one influen Republican.
tative Gillett, of Massachusetts,
cast the only vote in the committee in sup-
Ei i Ss
by an overwhelming majori
! ————————————————————————
Paddy (oblivious, on the track, with
unr ol { : “Where will I catch the
to au yerll enol
s WYe'l] it all over
hen- re 32 don'y get off the line mighty
——Paradise is here, visible and tangi-
ble by mortal eyes and bands, wherever
self is lost in loving.
|
|
i
|
i
——"
About the Presidents,
Twenty-five Presidents of the United
States in one hundred and sixteen years,
makes the average term for cach {our years
and eight months.
Had none been re-elected and all served
their full terms, there would have been
twenty-nine. Had all, both elected and
re-elected, served their foll terms, there
would bave been only twenty, or an aver-
age term for each of five years and nine
months.
Eight-- Washington, Jefferson, Madison,
Monroe, Lincoln, Grant, Cleveland, and
McKiunley--were re-elected. All but Lin-
coln and McKinley served their fall terms.
Five-- William Henry Harrison, Taylor,
Lincoln, Garfield, and McKinley -died in
office.
The five Vice Presidents wha sneceeded
these Presidents served seventeen years, an
average of three and a half years, or almost
a fall term: each. Harrison survived his
inauguration only thirty-one days, and
Lincoln his second inauguration forty-two
days, so that Tyler and Johnson each prac:
tically served a fall term. Arthur and
Roosevelt served three yess and a hall
each, and Fillmore two.
Based upon past experience, there is one
chance agains: four shat a President will
not serve his fall term.
All but Washington, William Henry
Harrison, and Grant were lawyers,aithough
few if any attained to great eminence in
their profession.
Monroe. Hayes, Garfield, Benjamin Har-
rison, Arthur, MoKinley, and Roosevelt
bad some soldierly fame.
Washington, Jackson, William Henry
Harrison, Taylor, and Grant were elected
primarily on account of successful military
achievements.
Both Adamses, Jefferson, Madison, Mon.
roe, Van Buren, Buchanan, Lincoln, Cleve-
land, McKinley, and Roosevelt were chosen
by reason of distinguished political careers.
Polk, Pierce, Hayes, and Garfield were
nomivated as compromise candidates, be-
cause of the close contests between more
prominent aspirants.
All were Anglo-Saxon, except Monroe,
Polk, and Bachanao, who were of Gaelic
origin ; MoKinley, of Celtic; Pierce, of
Frankish; and Van Baren and Koosevelt,
atch.
Two elected from Tennessee hore prac-
tically the same name, Jackson and John.
son,
Seveu—Washington, Jefferson, Madison,
Monroe, William Heury Harrison, Tyler,
and Taylor—were vatives of Virginia ; as
was Lincoln’s father, who resided there only
a short time previous to the birth of his
distinguished son.
Five—Grant, Hayes, Garfield, Benjamin
Harrison, and McKiunlev-—were vatives of
Ohio; three—Jackson, Polk, and Johnson
—of North Carolina ; three—Van Buren,
Arthur, and Roosevelt—of New York; two
~—the elder and younger Adams—of Massa.
chusetts; Pierce, of New Hampshire; Buoh-
avan, of Pennsylvania ; and Cieveland, of
New Jersey.
Nearly one-half of the twenty-five were
born in Virginia or Ohio ; the other thir-
teen in seven other States. All hat two of
the nine States were of the original thir-
teen,
His Number.
Two men stepped ap to the desk at the
Brown Palace Hotel gesterday afternoon
and one of them registered. The other was
acyvainted with C. H. Churchill, the clerk.
‘Hello, Church !I"’ he said, “'T want you
to meet my friend, Mr. Fish, He's out for
a Chicago firm.”
The cierk shook hauds with the man
who had just registered. “Glad to know
you, Mr. Fish,” he said. “What do you
sell 2"
“‘Scales,’’ was the reply.
“A good line for a Fieh,” said Mr.
Churchill.
The traveling man drew a little hook
from his pocket. ‘‘Let’s see,” he said, as
he turned the pages. ‘'‘Yoor number is
“My number ?*’ said the clerk, perplex-
*‘Yes,” said the drummer. ‘‘Just 9784
people have sprung that joke on m= since I
took up this work 18 months ago.’
‘Aw, go weigh !”’ said Mr. Churchill.
The traveling man winced, but decided
to remain at the hotel, anyway.
Mataally Satisfactory.
They had been married in due and an-
cient form.
‘'Geoflrey,’” said the young wife, you
endowed me with all your worldly goods
didn’t you ?”
“I did,” answered the young husband.
‘‘Well,I hereby give them back to you.”
“Gwendolen,” he said, ‘‘von promised
0 Shey te, did you not?”
‘Well, dear, I hereby solemnly com-
mand you to do as you please hereafter, no
matter what orders I may give you."
{oa that basis they lived happily ever
after.
Too Many Meaningless Things.
The average house is too full of furniture
and meaningless things,
Everything in the house that does not
add something to the convenience, happi-
ness or education of the family or some
member of the family is an extravagance.
To be sure, every house needs a vase or
two for flowers, but #0 many of these vases
one sees are too fancy for use and are good
for vothing but to stand upon the mantel
and be dusted.
Taking No Chances,
An epil dropped in a fit on the
streets Bilepsio 4 not long ago and was
taken toa bospital. Upon removing his
coat there was found pioned to his waist.
coat a slip of paper on which was written :
“This is to inform the house-surgeon
that this is inst a case of plain fit : not ap-
peodicitis. My appendix has already been
removed twice.”
Heavenly Plumbing.
It was raining very hard and listle Mary,
who wished to go out, fretted.
“Mother,” asked, ‘‘where does so
much rain come from ?’*
‘‘Heaven, my dear.”
“Does God do it?’
“Yes, dear.”
“Well, I do wish He'd turn off the
spigots now."’
wee] am convinced,’’ said the nervous
ay we ought to rearrange our
0
“In what way?"
“Su as to bring Thanlagiviog Day on
the hh of Jul oF gwar | mast
evoutly ie o find my family
with me uninjured.”
Toys as Educators.
A striking featare of the Christmas toys
now being exhibited in the shop windows
is the use that bas heen made of modern
inventions,
“Two-thirds of our toys are edacative,”’
said the manager of a certain toy depart-
ment the other day. *‘We have to follow
the times and study the newspapers with
the most carefcl attention,
‘“For instance, we may see predicted a
clever invention which will shortly be
placed on the market. Oar inventor im-
nediately ~ets his brains to work, and the
toy will make its appearance among the
children at the same time as the original
is interesting the older members of the
community.
“Children are our eritics nowadays.
That is oue of the reasons why it is neces-
sary for uz to be so careful. Take as an
example any slight difference in equip-
ment of the military. We will he obliged
to make this difference in all our soldiers.
The same applies to onr toy vaiforms. If
a badge were placed on the wrong aide, if
the slighest mistake were made, those uni-
forms would not pass muster. Our boys
know too much.
*‘The old order is changed. A hoy does
not some to as requesting a toy boat. He
may want anything from an electric launch
to a submarine, but every detail must he
perfect.
‘“At present there is the motor-ear boom,
and the toy oars are exactly like the real
thing, with the exception that they are
driven by pedals.
‘Next year the acroplane will be flitti
about the nursery, and a top aeroplane wil
be an easy matter, because the great diffi-
culty of weight-lifting capacity will not
affect the miniature model.”
Immigrant Mother's Plight.
Writing of Ellis Island scenes Ernest
Poole says:
““In this same ball an old Austrian moth-
er was kept five days. She had loss the
railroad ticket her son had sent her. Again
and again they telegraphed to the small
town where she said he lived, but no reply
came.
‘‘ *He is so five, so strong, so rich—my
Fritz!” she kept saying. ‘This fine dress
and this bonnet he sent me. To Austria
be wrote me every week. Sarely—surely
he will come!"’
‘‘She grew worse and worse. She conld
not sleep at night, and all day she sat
by the window watching the Manhattan
skyscrapers. Her face grew haggard and
lined with tears. She was so hewildeaed,
he could no longer answer questions The
name of the town was all she could give.
There were eighteen towns of this name in
varions states; but the name of her son's
state she had forgotten. All the knew was
that Fritz lived in a town ‘quite near New
york.” Town after town was telegraphed
to. Still no veply. At last it seemed
hopeless; aud the old lady was about to be
deported,
‘Suddenly came a telegram:
‘* ‘Hold mother! Am coming!” And four
hours later another: ‘Don’t deport my
mother. I bave plenty to support her. Am
coming by fast train. Hold her!
‘‘And late thas afternoon a youog man,
sleepless and wild-eyed, arrived—from
Kausae! ‘Quite near New York.’ ''—Every-
body's.
Bolled Wine Tastes Good.
At the time of the San Francisco fire last
April 100,000 quart bottles of choice Cali-
fornia champagne boiled for over foity-
eight hours in 1,000,000 gallons of sherry.
The result was the production of 10,000
quarts of champagne of rare flavor at a cost
however, never before expended on a like
quantity.
The sherry was contained in 80,000-gal-
lon casks on the upper floors of the baild-
ing of the California Wine Association.
The fire destroyed the casks and the flood
of sherry ponred into the cellars, where
were stored the 100,000 bottles of wine.
The fury of the flames soon heated the
sherry to boiling point and the boiling cou-
tinued for two days and nights. When
cooled the sherry was found to be filled
with extraneous matter and worthless, so
it was pumped out into the streets. Then
it was found that 10,000 of the bottles of
champagne were unbroken and that the
un eled process had imparted to the
wine rare flavor. Wine experts are now
testing out the ‘‘hoiling process’”’ and the
result may he a revolution of the methods
of this industry
———A distingnished lawyer, when a
small bor, made a visit to friends, after
giving his mother a solemn promise that
he would ask for nothing to eat. The fam-
ily were not accustomed to the ways of
boys. One day he endured the pangs of
hunger as long as he could, and then
ont, ‘0, there is plenty of bread and but-
ter in this house; hut what is that to me?"’
——*] wouldn't mind your ing
poker with the crowd, but you always lose.”
*Well, dear, that merely proves the
truth of the old saying, ‘Lucky in love un-
lucky at cards.”
‘Oh, well, I guess you can afford to play
once in a while.”
~——Mary Elizabeth—*‘‘Mamma, have
we any ant brothers ?"’
Mamma —*‘No, dear ; but I don’t quite
understand you."
Mary E—**Well, because we have ant-
sisters, yon know, I thought we might
have ant-brothers somewhere.’
Very well, sir,” cried Dr. Kwack
after his quarrel with the undertaker, “I'll
make you sorry for this.”
““What are you goi to do?’ sneered
the undertaker. * re from practice?’
——Merchaut: ‘I would be glad to give
ou the position, young mao, but I make
t a rule to employ married men only.”
Applicant: ‘Beg pardon, sir, but bave
you an unmarried daughter?’
——*Do yon believe in divorce ?"’
“No, indeed !"
“Why not ?'’
“My wife won't let me.”
IM Jk han mg
proper ou r mus
they have no time left to cultivate their
brains.
A ———
~—Learning by study must be won ;
t'was ne'er ail by sire to son.
—-—A kind word will go farther and
strike harder than a cannon ball.
——The preacher does not show his grit
by slinging sand at the saints.
——Q(ne man’s reputation cannot be
bailt on another’s ruin.
—Some men mistake their moral dys-
pepsia for religion,