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kw^pvlfta*
»*onieMM«f Impottncy.
lowqMM
rigor »nd robnvt bvtlth
sS^£r* torttr * urfbT
for $6, «od fomr-
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McCRUM & j)EKS,
VOL 9.
oa ve THE PER CENTAGE
b * ; BY PAYING YOUR
CLOTHING ''ROM FI RST HAN OS.
ErriNGER ■& TUCK, Manufacturers
>‘t, u-lmleailo 1 lletail Rowly pmde
ufi«‘ l |"" | ;,. el . t f u ||r invite tbo attention <>f the
Cl..tMiyf-4«E“ ~X ft. ct, to .eferenc to (Mr «i*k.
!,£ ; our own fiood.. They Me W«le
l.t, “! re J n I'hiUili'li'Mi. nn.iwoorloimeiltate
XvrvW.nv.ua wo'llnuiv they mv 'veil toad*MHl ejto he
“rv’CtTAT TO THE BEST,
to!" liX»t ~toto.i.yer Ueudymtuto Ath-
toh. J'«^|r^r±S4SS
Mnnulittureri. »« « H,rw ’ "•f* 0 *
o, ’vT ilnthtos at a reasonable IWTOM**
arJ. 1' .T.,..,,i.v eiriiiK« >epnrebMM*
> thStoMi. by
ofCMhink »>*- »' - .j jwrjEui. We retail our
wlio bi*S from .. • . vJ • u mc rchanta jw*y
X| '.T » ..vinK «Ui Clothiers’
per co^UR' 1 . j
VVf Live brmch Ss*vc* in
ALTOONA AND .JOHNSTOWN,
where iamb, urny be mil at the .amo figures at which we
veil tl.nil here In tlnncity. ■ ' T 11 (.,...
■ If,my (n'rann has fa n tol.l. or imagines, that Tuck a
More in Altnana. il • lilayml nnt.” let euen peragn <ln p
ini., hiiestalilislimenit.on Slain Street, and examine h.a
XXfo'iKnw, Jfc. 702 Market Street, I>Uil.nleljllii«.
h.-c, a. isoa.-tr [
XE\V GOODS.
TUK mulcrsitncd would respectfully |in
firm lho citizonf* of Alio-na ami snnoiimiinK c<hiih
try. lliar ho Jms jii't from thoEust, where he Mas
Wen lns Pt.u li of
FALL ANu WINTER GOODS,
which, far »t vie. 411 .'l ty mid I'rici-. cannot be aurp;vS‘‘(l in
this nccli of’conitrv. lib- sock i. much larger t|nui
lieretofine. mill a» it S<* ijiiite mi ol4cct. in tnesc exciting
»nr tiliiM, fir every .pie in I'llrclicv: wlicrc they can get
The Itet GuoiM and at the Lowest Prices,
hewouhlnav lh.it hr can nml will sell a* lew. if a
link tower tl):u»art.vi»tlK'i’l'oiisC in this place- He wishes
*ll to (j*il ami seehi*Utock Before pm-chasing elsewhere.
*„ he lei U coiihdout (if can oiler inducements which prill
Jufy aauuetitien. linstock consists of
LADIES* DHESS GOODS ot every description,
MEN AND ilOVp WINTER WEAK,
■ LADIES A-NJo MISSES’ DU ESS SHOES,
MEN A'jD BOVS’ BOOTS AND SUOGS.
MEN'S U-.LP HOSE
"WOMENS AJfD MISSES' WOOL HOSE,
fUTSiANT) CAVSi I •
BLEACHED AND UNBLEACHED MUSLIN.
(IiNTiiIUMS AND lIKAVY DRILLINGS.
Hi* «jlll Bt-ll L'i'lic.-'jSottvtl, Keeled Bootees. Jit $1.50(5.1.75
i'lixijotl I l.B7@l!.00
Meu'.-ijlout*. j 2.73@1^50
BAUftllui n rv
(IKOCEKIES. . ‘
Whtt* s and Brown Kio Culler**, Syrup*. Tea*. &c.*
«n.I ;V.sn thins th?tt ij. usually kept in a Dry (i.hhls Stoire,
»ml .;H cheap hs tht‘> J. A. SI’UANKLK.
AlPm-ua,'Oct. 7.1&i.£.
CITY IMIUG- STORK.;
Dili. U. H. i|. MIG ART would respect
frilly nnmmmv Ifo ih<* dlizepsiof Altoona ami siir-
Minnlmir country, tiiUt h<; ha* recently purchased the
Drugstore of Jlerlin Cu„ bn Vhgiuia Stnvi, opposite
Fries* Ihmlwnre Jstorel.
His Drugs Are Fresh and Pare,
•utlho hopes’ by strij-t attention to business, to merit a
•ban* ofs public putnnjage. 1
Call ainl examine lift stock. He has constantly on hand,
; pm: os.
fMBDICtS’ES-and CHEMICALS, ' :
m’£ TOILET SOAPS. PERFUMERY. BRUSHES,
VLASS, PUTTY, | PA/XTJS, OILS, V.IRXISHES,
C.ißUO.i' OIL A.\D LAMPS,
XOTIO.XS, CIGARS,
•at terry article usually kept in a First class Drug Stare
PURE WIVES AND LIQUORS
■ ' for! medicinal use.
DOMESTIC CRAPE! WIN K-PUIIE—WARRANTED.
PUrSICIAKS- PRESCRIPTIOXS
accurately ci»iipunii(lt'|l, at all hours of the day or nieht
Altouua, Sept. JSci>. 3 •
MORE (COMPETITION!
A NEW DRY GOODS STOKE
RGINIA STREET. i
HE LA DESIGN El) WOULD JiE
b:ii JS” l ffi?e4uf XOl ' JiCE l ° |,UbliC ahc
MILLINjERY GOODS,
, A ITU, USE OF
GOODS,^m
I)KI,AIM.S. AI.MCAS, IIEPS
UNOHaJMS. musmxs, KTC.
flom 23 *3 cents per ynnl
cAi.ifjo ' i " "ii? T “
HKI.AI.VES I .. £££ „ „ ..
in,l ,11 .stJ.oi- article, j|, proportion.
OO..^u*^,^? l X ,IOSIERY ’
”«*«■■“« in
Jl ' '« t'Vllw- lowmt figure FOIt
WwicfS t , llm »V" M * «•«» l-rta* will prove
wjiLaCCJrtj.l tuvite ft call from \\ it * public.
REBECCA AIcCLELLAND.
Dec' 23'1.ISCS-ty. |
1864. SIT.IM; 1864'
CIRC! I ’ J , A J.t i
T take pleasure; in issuing this mv Sprint
HATS: and CAPS
,U<lUam} ' CH,or and >'*•«o-
I Imre also I 'might at) immense stock of
„ BOOTS iAND SHOES
coinplot.*, it 1 .»f xrhiehSlp t ? l,WreM »* Shmn is
vancfoti ' I ' OW ftt » small ad
»tS', l ’ Ubl ' C .' Vil !. ,M - - Kr f" ll - v l'fncflte.l by giving tbiv their
“ ,I ru * k - “»** *>“«•
apS-tf
just RhCEIiVED—A Lot (ff Prime
Jan. 13; ’64.] ,!
Hp’ IjM bgld’B genuine bugqu
Bitter*, nt
Jna 13. t)t| ! UKKjf ATtT'S Dm? Store.
\T EN A'ND BOYS’ COATS, of every
*od color, l t»f goxl quality, at
f j laughmavs.
EW AND IMPROVED STYLES
of Tmuka, Values ami at •
| LAUGIIMAX’S.
PBke white lead and zing
alsoChrorLe,Groen. Yellow,ParisGreen, irty
•fm gronmi Oil at I [l-tCj |
EL STYLES CARPETING AND
- piljClot'.can bo foooda ■ L AUG HSIAN'S.*
rj-i I KAT PILES OP PANTALOONS
v' ,»0|i».«» LAtKiHHAN’S.
4aSES S.MANN, Main street.
\ . Altfcim. i*a.
Drag Storl
THE ALTOONA TRIBUNE.
E. B. ilcCßUlt,
EDITOR* AND PROPRIETOR!!
Per annum, (pay Able JnviirlaMy in sl 60
All papors diacontluatkl :at the expiration of the time
Vi ■
TS&MB OP’ADVBtTISII^:
;1 insertion 2 do. 3 do.
Four line* or 1*ib..,..5.« 1.... $ 25 $ $ sfr
One Square, <8 U0e»).60 78 1 00
Two * no “ ioo 150 200
Throe “ (24 « )„ 150 200 850
Over three week* and Its* than three months, 26 cent*
per square for each inaertiqp. #
A month*. 6 months. 1 year.
Six lines or less 160 $3OO $5OO
One square .....X, ... 250 4 00 7 00
Two “ ~ 400 000 10 00
Three “ 6 00 8 00 ; 12 00
Poor G OO 10 00 14 00
Half a column 10 00 14 00 20 00
One column 14 00 25 00 40 00
Adminixtrators and Executor* Notices a 1 75
Merchants advertising by .the year, three squares,
with liberty t<tchauge...Xl k 10 00
Professional or Business Card*, not exceeding 8' Hues
9 Hit paper, per year... 6 00
Comrann lent ion* of a political character or individual
interest, will In* charged according-to the above rates.
Advertisement* not itmrtr<l with, the number of Inser
tion* desired, will bo continued till forbid and charged
according to the aluvre
Business notices five cent* per line for every inofrtion.
Obituary .notice* exceeding ten.llnes, fifty centsa square
-—t"
MY TREASURES.
I’ve a casket of treasures
From a dearly loVed store,
And in memory !s l£ght
I’m counting them o’er.
Oh 1 long they’ve wen garnered
In my lieart’s chgmber-rooin.
With the relic# of Uy gones,
’Mid its grior and lts gloom.
There’s a smile liketho sunbeam,
As soft, and as light.
And bright as the star-beam*
That smile on the'mght.
A *ear from a lovodpne,
(At parting.was given,)
’ Now stainless, .and spotless,
' An angel in heaven.
A word krVulJy spoken,
A look and a siglP:
Though earth may ail perish,
These never can die ;
To me they are riclter
Than treasures of-gold,
More precious tlmu
Their value untold.
THE MONEY LENDER;
Or, Too Many in One Basket.
‘ Will you discouirt this note for me V-
The question was masked by
in the office of a private banker, a man of
large fortune, who had retired from busi
ness. and now used bis capital for discount
ing instead-of in trqde.
The shrewd money lender took the note,
and after examining; the face, handed it
back with a shake off the head, arid a very
firm compression on |iis mouth.
‘ It is A number one,’ said the merchant,
with almost an amusrid smile, at the pru
dence of the money lender.
:‘ I have r.o question as to that,’ was
replied. *lf I were in business, I should
not hesitate to sell the firm to any reason
able extent.
‘Why, then, will you not buy their
note?” ;
A pleasant light cjime into the money
lender’s face. He looked knowing, and
very selLcomplacent. 1
‘ I wag in inarket ;the other day,’ said
he, ‘ and as I stood buying sonic ti uit lit
a woman’s stall, a man, in going by, was
crowded against a basket standing thereon,
which fell to the pavement. It was near
ly filled with eggs, more Rian two-thirds
of which were broken. ‘Ah, my good
woman,' said I, ‘ the Aid error of too many
eggs in one basket. /If you had placed
them in two or three baskets, instead of
one, this general, wreck would never have
occurred.’ ‘ln my business, sir,’ contin
ued the money lender, ‘I never commit
the error of this market woman. I never
place too many eggs fn one basket. Do
you understand me t’;
‘ I belieyp so,*, replied the merchant
‘You already have enough of this paper.’
•Just as mpcli aS I intended buying.
When some of it is taken up, I will make
room for more. These are fixed laws, sir,
that govern me in' tibia business,
never depart from them.
•Good morning,’^said'the merchant,
smiling. ‘ I hope ydu will never get too
many eggs in one basket. ,
‘No fear of that. Ilf a basket is upset
and the eggs in it,broken, I shall be able
to bear the loss.’ ! ,
The merchant. 1 withdrew, and the money
lender turned over lit his mind the word
just spoken, and felt self-complimented at
his wise caution ‘ No —no’—he iepeated
over and over again/: ‘ They cannot tempt
me to place too many eggs in one basket.
I am tno old and prudent for that.’
This figure of speech seemed to please
the money lender, and lie used it a number i
of times during the day, in declining good
business paper that was offered.
‘Have I put too m|my eggs in one bask
et,-, to day?’, he asked;’of hipiself as he sat
alone during the evening that followed
counting up, mentally, his gains, and look
ing with a feeling of pleasure, at the unusu
ally large aggregate ; ‘Let me see! That
last note of L. & O ’a came very
near to a violation of the rule. There are
quite enough eggs ini that basket. I must
not venture another/one. But the temp
tation of two pgr coat, was hardly to be
resisted on such paper which all regard as
gilt-edged.’
it was now over five years since our
money lender withdrew from productive
trade and narrowed down his intellect
and his efforts to the simple business of
buying paper, which the holders were un
able to get done in bank. During that
period he had added largely' to his waelth
while his desire for accumulation had
grown stronger, and manifested itself in a
more eager reaching out after, and draw
ling of '.he gold that perishes. As a mer
chant he had been liberal, generous, kind
hearted; and oilmen spoke of him as such.
But the yvorit of mere money getting, out
side of any productive use in society, had
brought {he interior of his mind into new
associations ; and his heart was steadily
hardening. Every day the circle of his
thoughts narrowed itself; every day his
heart stooped lower and lower in adora
tion before the miser’s god. Others saw
the change l —spoke of it, and regretted it.
But as he grew richer find richer, and
the worshipers of riches bent to him in
flattery, he imagined himself to be growing
better. ; i i
- 11. C. BERK.
‘ Too many Icjggs in one basket,’ he re
peated to himsejlf, as be sat musing in Ins
luxurious easy chair ; neVei for once think
ing of iho struggling young merchant, with
whose profits on a sale of! five hundred dol
lars he had clipped off a six mouths note
that day ; a note as us any he had
bought during the past week.
‘ Top many eggs in one basket! No —no.
I am too shrewdi for that!’ Drowsily was
this murmured, as he laid his head among
the cushions. IJis next consciousness was
in another world. Ho dreamed that he
had passed through the dark portal of eter
nity, and that to ! him the judgement from
the Hook of his Lite had come —a jiidgp
ment that was tq reveal his true slate, and
fix his everlasting habitation with those
who loved the neighbor as themselves; or
with those who‘loved and cared only for
themselves. He did not find himself in the
presence of an august, Divine Judge, but
in a chamber, with translucent walls and
ceiling, where were gathered a small as
semblage of people, to the centre of which
he was led by one who seemed to possess a
singular power over him. Here, seated
and a little elevated above the rest, were
two beings,—one: with a countenance of
heavenly beauty, land the other wilhafaco
the cruel expression of which caused a
shudder lo go thrilling to his heart. A
book lay open before them, and he knew
it to be a Book of his Life, wherein were
written every purpose of his heart, with
every act and deed. The money lender
had come to judgement.
With a hopeful countenance the angel
began turning the leaves of the book, up
on whigh both her eyes, and that of the
demon, were fixed with an earnest gaze.
The period of childhood showed a fair and
hopeful record. The tender, merciful, lov
ing impressions made upon the heart of her
child by a wise and good mother, who
looked forward to a meeting with her son
in heaven, were every where visible. The
budding soil gave a fair promise for the
fruit and flower.
Early manhood’s record was also full of
encouragement. There was an eager look
ing forward into life, and an earnest'will
towards success. But, united with this,
were generous purpose toward others, and
great humanilary schemes to be wrought
out for (he world’s good, when the money
power to work should come within his
grasp. The light and hope beamed in the
angel’s face, as page after page of the book
was turned ; while the demon sat dark and
scowling;
The middle period showed less fairly, as
to (he ends of life —and it was into these
that the angel and (lie demon looked most
narrowly. The aid was never judged of
as it stood alone—it was by the motive
that its quality was determined.
A gentle sadness began to shadow the
angel's beautiful countenance, while dimly
seen in the demon’s -face was the light of
triumph. Many acts of benevolence; ma
ny words of good counsel to others ; many
declarations of noble, generous,
purposes were written down; but they were
seen as deeds with - selfish ehds as their
prompters, and words that were only from
the ‘teeth outward.’ More and more
asi wealth rolled into the raei chant’s cof
fers, and he gained a higher and higher
place in the gopd opinions of men, did he
bury bis thoughts in selfish purposes, and
put forth his strength fur himself alone, as
if ho were ihe .chietest thing in God’s cre
ation. His name was on subscription pa
pers, for charitable uses, to a large amount;
but, when the angel and the demon went
behind the record, what did they find 1
A generousdesire to benefit the suffering
or help the week ?, Alas! no. They saw,
instead; an Extorted benevolence, in most
instances; done for the eyes of men, and
succeeded by a self complacent gratulation.
in the loss pi so much of, his dearly loved
gains, that ‘ charity covers a multitude (t
sins!’ *
Sadder and sadder grows the angel’s
face ; brighter and brighter, with an evil
triumph, the face of the demon.
. At last came the closing years of life,
when the useful merchant sunk down into
[independent in evebtthing.]
ALTOONA, PA., SATURDAY, JULY 23, 1864.
the eager money lendeil. Previous to this,
gleams of better purposes would throw a.
hopeful over a page, and lighten
"the saddening angel’s face. But the record
now had in it little <jf variation, and no
passage of-light. Desire moved on in an
even current, and thought .had free course
under the pressure of desire There was
the one desire to get money, and the oho
thought about the surest means. The
face of a man—the fqrm of a man—the
step of a man—but quickened,his avari
i cious impulses. He was a great tumor,
absorbing the rich blood of trade, andgrow
| ing larger and larger, as healthy, working
organs in the man or society, became weak
er from impaired vitality. Gold had be
come the god before wl|om he bowed down
in daily adoration. He loved nought else:
and though, from a lingering desire to ap
pear well in the eyes of his fellow men,
yet in every such act there was the effect
to compass a worldly advantage that man -
ed the record in his book of lite. : Thus
for instance, he hud given liberally to the
erection of churches, but only when they
were to be located near his property, the
value of which would be improved thereby
far beyond the sum of his subeription.
As the last page of the book was turned
the angel breathed a deep sigh and faded
from the money vision !
‘Too many eggs if) .one basket!’ said
the demon, in a voice qf triumph, as he
bent his malignantfacej so close that Ids
hot breath almost suffocated the terrified
money lender, wno started into wakeful
life as he felt himself clutched by the de
mon’s vice like hands!
passed before his, wildly throbbing heart
calmed itself down to its wonted even pul
sations.
‘ Only a dream—a foolish dream!’ be
said to himself, as he vainly tried to rise
above the depressed state of feeling which
the mercifully sent vision had left behind.
But conscience told hipi that it was more
than a dream, and that, while in all worldly
produce he was careful not to get too many
eggs in a single basket, jin matters of eter
nal interest he had one basket only and in
that the price of his soul was resting.
He shuddered as the thought fixed his
mind, and overwhelmed jill his convictions.
‘What shall it profit a man if he gain
the whole world and lose his own soul; or
what will a man give in exchange for his
soul’
It seemed like the voice of his mother,
speaking hack to him from the years of
childhood.
‘God help me!’ he said, with a shudder.
‘ I am not. in the right path.’
Did he go back to hjs eager money lend
ing? We know not The dream was
sent in mercy, and let us hope that it
wrought upon him its high and holy mis
son. ‘ 1
An Uncalled Fob Amen. — A corres
pondent of (lie Methodist Protestant re
lates the following story, which is too
good to |>e lost:
‘ A very sensitive preacher in a certain
village, not more than a hundred miles
from Baltimore, wiis discoursing with
great warmtli on the-uncertainty of human
life. To give the greater effect to his re
marks, after assuring his hearers that they
might die before an hour elapsed, he said,
“ And I, your speaker, may be dead be
fore ano'her morning dawns.”
“ Amenwas the audible response of
a pious and much beloved brother in the
congregation. The preacher was evident
ly disconcerted for a moment.. He thought
the brother misunderstood Ida meaning.
Pausing awhile, he repeated the declara
tion, ‘before another hour your speaker
many be in eternity!’: ‘Amen! again
shouted the brother before him.
It was to much for the sensitive man.
and stammering out a few additional re
marks, he sat down before be had near
Unshed his discourse.
‘Brother x E ,’ sasd the i preacher
next day, to his kind 1 carted friend of
the amen corner, ‘what ijlid you mean by
saying Amen to my remarks last night.—
Do you wish 1 was Head I?’
‘Not at all,’ said the good brother, ‘not
at all. I thought that if you should die,
you would go straight [to glory, and 1.
mean ament to that V
, ; ■ '— —| : ”
The Force pf Habit. — In the Dublin
University Magazine wei have a biograph
ical sketch of Peter Burrows, the celebra
ted barrister, and among the personal an
ecdotes told of him is the following:
A friend called upon him one morning
in Ids dressing-room, and found him sha
ving, with his face to the wall. He ask
ed why ho chose so strange, an
His answer was, to look in the glass.
“ Why,’ said his fried, “there is noglass
there.’
“ JBless my soul !” cried Burrows, “Idid
'not notice that before.” ■
Kinging the bell, he called his servant
and questioned him respjecting his looking
glass. | ,
“.Oh, sir,” said the servant, “mistress
had it removed six tceeka ago.
<9* Tell not your secriatain a corn-field,
i t has thousands of ears. -
Parents’ Example befobetiieik Chil
dren. —There is a great diversity of opin
ion in regard to the age when children are
capable of understanding what they see
and bear—when they are old enough to
mind what is told them. How often have
we heard .mothers exclaim, “When miy
child is old enough U understand, I am go
ing to have him do diffidently ; lam going
to teach him thus and iso, and I am going
to : make him mind.” ; How much older
need a child he to lenrn to do right, than
to understand that he; may do wrong t
Mother, how old was that little one, when
lying in your arms, he first began to raise
those smiling eyes, and’recognise in you
his dearest earthly .friend? iAnd. when
seated on the floor or in the arms of anoth
er, you came into his presence, how soon
did he understand that the ourfitretelling
of those tiny arms to iyou were pleadings
that you could not refuse ?
I was deeply impressed, a short lime
since by the relation of a little incident by
a mother. She had two dear little boys,
the younger not yet three years old, Great
care had been taken by the parents to set
a, good example before them I o' do 'right
It was the custom of the father to always
ask a blessing before partaking food. One
day as they were gathered arcund the fam
ily board, tjje little ones by their side, the
father says to the mother, ‘‘You ask a bles
sing this time.” She dropped her lead
and replied, “I do not leel as if I could.”
Several days passed; the
their play one day had set their
hie with dishes, placed on it the food their
mother had given them, and seating them
selves to partake of it; the older one says
to the younger, who had not yet seen three
full summers: ,
Won ask the blessing Jo-day.” The
little one replies in the very language the
mother had used, “I do not leel as if I
.could.” The mother was near and had
heard her own refusal to thank God for his
blessing repeated by her dear child whom
she did not think quite old enough*to un
derstand. She said, “ I never felt so re
buked for my unfaithfulness in ajl my life.”
Can parents begin too early to set a good
example before theii children? Do not
think they are quite old enough to under
stand.
John Smith,—John Smith, plain John
Smith is not very high-sounding ; it does
not suggest aristocracy; it is not the name
nf any hero to die-away novelty; and yet it
is good; strong and honest. Transferred
to other languages it seems to climb *the
ladder of respectability. Thus in the fjltiii
it is Johannes Smith; the Italian srauftlies
it off into Giovanni Smith; the Spafinrds
render it Juan Stnithus; the Dutchman
styles it Hans Schmidt; the French flatten
it out into Jean Sracels; and the Russian
sneezes and barks JonloifF Smittowski.—
When John Smith gets into thetea-trade at
Canton, lie becomes Jabon Schmit; if he
clambers about Mdur.t Hecla, the Icelan
ders say he is Jahne Smithson ; if he trades
among the Tnscarorns,i he becomes Tom
Qua Smittia; in Poland he is known ns
Ivan Schmittiweiski; should he wander
among the Welsh mountains, they talk ol
Jolion Schmid; •'hen be goes to Mexico
lie is looked at as Jentli F’Smitti; if of
classic turn, he lingersiamong Greek ruins,
lie turns to ion Sinilktqn : and in Turkey
he*ss recognized as Yap Sees.
A Desperate Man. —A remarkable
arrest was recently mand ,in the Tyrol.
A man named Gasser had threatened to
kill his wife. She tjed to a neighbor,
whose dog was thereupon shut by Gasser.
Two 'gens d'uimes Were sent to arrest him.
These lie shot. A person coining up to
take away the t-orpse Of one of the killed
was also shot.; This roused the neighbor
hood and anthori'ies,! who laid regular
siege to the culprit in his house. Several
of them were also shotand mortally woun
ded. One hundred balls were fired at bis
house during the day and night,' but Gas
ser still remained uninjured. The next
■day two cannon were brought up and
discharged; still with jut result, Untill. a
storming party, taking from the lull in
Gasser’s lire, rushed into the bouse and
found their man bleeding and wounded on
the floor, entirely exhausted, his veins
opened at the wrists, aud flowing-forth
his life blood. The scene took place at
Lautcrach.
Madam,” said a very polite trave
ler to a testy old landlady, “if I see pro
per to help myself to this milk is there
any impropriety in it?”
“I don’t know whafyon mean; but if
you mean to insinuate that (here is any
thing nasty in the milk, I’ll give yon to
understand that you’ve struck the wrong
jiquse! There ain’t a first hair 1 in ‘ it, for,
asjsoon as Dorutliy Ann told me (hat the
cat was drowned in the milk I went straight
and strained it over.”
The young man fainted.
B®, Truths the most awful and myste
rious are too often considered as ao true
that they lose all the life and efficiency of
truth, and lie hid in iiie dormitory of the"
soul, side by side with the most despis
ed tutors. ■ i "■
EDITORS AND PROPRIETORS.
PATRIOTIC DRINKING.
Speaking of sipping, we are reminded of
a genuine touch of imbibulatory logic
that readies us under the title of Patriotic
Drinking. ' . . - -
A man came to town the other
a little heavy about Ul9 head, and fearing
that he might be suspected of drinking a
little too freely, apologized to the crowd
of bystanders in the following eloquent
and patriotic language: m
“ Now 1 ax you tellers who’s the best
citizen, him as supports the Government,
or him us dosen’t? Why him as does, in
course. 1 supports Government, fellers—
every man as drinks support Government.
That is he drinks taxed licker. Every
blessed drop of licker ho drinks is taxed to;
pay them big officers at Washington and:
support the war. Sposo all was to quit a ■
drinking, way the war must stop and the ;
government fall—it couldn't help it no'
bow. That’s ! lie werry reason I drinks. :
I don’t like grog—l mortally liates it. If;
I fullered my own inclernation, I’d rather
drink butter-milk, or ginger-pop. or soda ■
water. But I tickers for the good of my
country, te set an example of loyally and |
wirtuous self-denial to the rising gener-;
atiop.”
An Incident of Shvloh.— -During the
battle of Shiloh, an officer hurriedly rode
up to an aid and inquired for Grant.
, “Thai’s him with the Held-glass,” said
the aid
Wheeling his horse about, the officer
furiously rode up to the General and touch
ing his cup. thus addressed him;
“Sheneral, 1 vants to make one report,
Schwart’s Battery is took.”
“Ah,” says the General;
that?”
■‘Veil, you see, Sheneral, do t—■—d
shcshenists cone up in front of us, and del
t ——d shcshenists flanked ns, and de t——d
shcshenists came in de rear of us, and
Schwartz's Battery was took.”
*' Well, sir,” says- the General “you of*
course spiked the guns.”
“ Vas!” exclaimed ike Dutchman in
astonishment; “schpike dem guns—
echpikc dem new guns! No, it 'would
sbhpuil cm."
“ Well,” said the General, sharply 'whati
did you do?” '
“Do! vy, we look dem back again!”
Ice a Life Pkolojkjer. —The problem!
of suspending life by freezing seems to be
accumulating data. Perch and mullet
have been brought from Lake Champlain
frozen perfectly solicit and,- on being put
into a tub of water, have come to life “as
lively as ever.”* A female convict in
Sweden is in ice on experiment. A man
was found lately in Switzerland who gavei
signs of life after being frozen for nine,
months. The power of stopping while
the world goes on may be the>next wonder:
Ice-houses may soon be advertised with
comfortable arrangements for skipping an
epoch, or waiting for the next generation.
He Paid in Advance. —A coteraporary
says:
“There is a man up' in our ; country
who always pays for his paper in advance:
He has never had a sick day in his life —I
never had any corns or toothache; —his
potatoes never rot—the weevil never oal.i
his wheat—the frost never kills his coma
or beans—his babies never cry in the night
and bis wife never scolds, and always
wears moderate sized hoops.—Header, if
you would witness like results ort your
own part, go, thou, and do likewise.”
A little girl, who was walking with
her mother, was tempted by the sight of
a basket of omnjrea, exposed fdr sale in a
store, and quietly took one ; but after
wards, stricken by conscience, returned it.
After her return home she wtfs discovered
in teargj.and, on being asked the cause of
her sorrow, replied, sobbing,fl “ Mamma,
I haven’t broken any of thfc command
ments, but I think I’ve cracked one it lit*
tie,” Site was forgiven.
SSSPAa enraged parent had jerked bis
provoking son across his knofe, and whs
operating on the exposed portions of the
urchin's person with vehemence, when
tho young one dug into the paternal leg,
with his vencmous'little teeth. f
‘ Blazes I what are you biting me for 1”
“ Well, who beginned this ere war ?”
CT The first instruction given to our
race was the Sabbath j the next wns’mar
riage. Reader, give your first thoughts
to heaven, the second to your wife.
Wit is no misfortune fora nice young
lady to lose her good name if u nice young
gentleman gives her a better.
feT A breath of New England’s ai£ is a
great deal better than a sup of old, En
gland’s ale. r . i
W The poorest education t|»at teaches
self-control is better than the best that neg
lects it. • ■.
W Despair not. The course pC gocps
providence may be as winding as bjs nr-
«/ I
NO. 19.
“how was