T ®fc3Bindei‘v &BOOKJIAK Wa 6^ I ’ n , iAxwiMito WSSSIfcS jSgS'^.^Cs; i#Wß««t »i«w. Harper's Weeklr ij, ‘ Ne *t pW*. 'Scientific Ani.riceii, to tod In any style r^ui™a.,p >n J'^' lu *c»s lti«Aw^’riSo‘ r^ J l t l'- l»W|*ay'. Book, Ud^™S^^«w. Mnflc. ic* buaort In «tra-^lf ettr ' S)U»d«ob»t»oti«l Imlf binding. Ri.S u 01 teWkimw, fsmalilet law*. twain! *!“•"- price..’ iKrZ '•■• tea** to bind, will receive «Jibuti df “ R “ BBWc: ifwwW' , #**• a- .. -V Si t s I .«•;£. £5 ? N ■< 'jJ i £ NOTIONS IN GREAT VARIETY «#*»#»'■■ Ojr 'has©. YD & CO., AI.TOOKA. PA TON. JACK & CO., bollidatsbvrg. pa-. IISTKEBS, “■Belt, Jofmtton, Jack # Co ”) •TS ON THE PRINCIPAL loa snw sad 0«M tor mß*. CoHectloni ( received ondepoeJte, P*J*Weon [demand, ft, ot upon lime, with Ililere*tr«t flUr rates. KESSLER—PBACTIC A I -OGJBT, r«prctfnlly uowana* cf Aitoimt ud «iB eontinoerthe tbra*: !«»»«•, Ttow-W : whert he :hjmicaia oitB,rAiuaBH rvrrs. , ; ~ rr 7^., tolnulncca, and » da»bre tor““ er **'■ u* regard* price and qnaßty, heliopt-Ji' tve ashare of public patronage- J*d merchant, supplied on j-eaeouohlc ten;i, from a diataooe promptly altwnW to, frawription. carrfidly compounded. I 1 1 ' ADY FRIENDS WOULD DO *.k, to opoo the choke gad erDKErS 0001)8 oo« dteiUyed "P°“ « ir ytoof M*!MPHT ‘T'eHIKB. Cor.afTtrgtateeßdCarobnt »u -38,1892. ■ ■ AND LARD OILS, CAM- 9 11 * Nit)} AT M cOORW XOK'S re odWi amortmeJit :—a LA3OIT ANl' kT, 100TH, BHAVDN^ md Tarutob Bnudiw *t rgagl KE s IM)S OF VJUN®#.... fi'LLAS AND DARAS^- .«wA.ty.a« iACtttUWs *i, tfue. , i ■ !'*■■■ ' ... PYLES CAJtPJSTING A^' 1 * i. An b« found -: JUCgg MA II- ERAD gjs* “* ™WgSg : Cnwm. twiai srj *OB «r* \ r OL. 8 £ h McC/i VM, t ,.,• ftimum. (payable iiivamhly in .$1 00 >ll )Mi''T« (lMcouriiui'‘ii at the expimlmii of the tiuic ~,Ki m-. | = ) insertion £ do. 3 do. ... $ ‘25 $. $ 50 5u •- 75 I *Ki ... 100 1 60 200 ... X 5o *2 (*0 2 50 , tin»m week;* nml/h*.s.H tlmu three'uKikjlhs. 25 cents ..juaio lor jwuh iueertiou. 3 months. 0 month*. 1 year. $ X 50 v $ 3 00 $ 6 00 2 50 4 00 7 Oo i oo o oo jo oo 5 00 8 ;00 12 00 /6 00 l4 CO 5 ;- * column 10 00 . 14 -00 2^m V.-,lumn 14 00 25 (K) 40 IK) , , Jli!l i“trutMr!Crtml Kxecututi! Notices V. 1 75 -i...rii.iitf* advWli-Jiig by the yenr, tin ee eg» tuck •vjrii I'lieriy fu change j. or kja....... -.jUrfr**. (8 .liur-.,j. 3AUTIMORS LOCK HOSPITAL , :-i A.t1.1ei1..1» As A IIKKOJIS KUUM^U'ACKKRT i’iia Only Place Where a Cure Can be Obtained- • ♦ ? \ll. JOHNSON lia.a discovered the / mu*! iVitaiii, and only UftiiCinal Remedy in r»v.»t Li !'*r till Ihivai* 1 Di-t-ases. \Veakues* ql the Ruck ~, Lj;noc sirls tiin *. Alf.-i-thui* of tin* Kidneys am! Hhtd ,,.iS :ji ..mat.try Diwcn 1151:1*'. impoteney, tie tiers* I Debility, >, Dyspppay. Languor.’ l.o*v Spirit**, Cunfuidoo ,tf (i -a-. t’,tiidO!ini of ilit* Heart. Timidity, ’tfreinblings. p. n) .,. of or (fuldineSM, Diaeaae of The He id. , i-,. -. W.sf or Sic in. Atfectioua of th- Liver. Lung-. Moin , 1 B •\reis—tuox>* Terrible disorder* uriHing from the , ll(t H min of Youtii —elm** skc itKT and ht>Htary*jjr«c --t mir- I'VE at u rheii victim)' than the Mongol Syrenato ~ I.uin-i' yf uiy-i'"-. blighting their m*.s*t brilliant 1 •- .if antioijiMti ms. rendering inunLige'.&c . impossi- , ... 1; - idful and destnetive habit which annual.y sweep** vi u'ltimelvgtavi* ih.iuv.inds of Young Men of the moat talorit*. itn-l brilliant intellect. who-might other ■v ... :-j.iv •.* entranced iNiening Seimt'* With t' e thunder** - 1 pj/tKv*. ui* wikt»*J to wtasy the living lyre, may call a ;• t . nl! .•■mthlenc-o. MARRIAGE. •; u , ;-.i or Voiing Alyn eotemplatina marriage, nv,i"- -f physical weakness, t-ripml'' debility. defor >. x- . -jK'i-Uil? emvd. l l \vu>*.pl:u:i'H him —ll undyr th' care of Dr. J. ifmy re 5-iv iMufi I- in hhorn" a« a gmitl'Mitan, and r.mfl . r< I v npm iil> skill a- a nli'Vfdciaii. ORGANIC WEAKNESS . .- li >:,dy Om L fail Vj K ■ Ui-ti-Wiiur AM'-.*-.--rn.ii —which n nd*-i « miserabi** i, u i up.c-i.dt?— i- th-*' penalty paid by the 'ij. .f i u >r>>p t i■; : (11 vT 1 ■ ’»'• i'*>. Vuiioj’ pi r-a n.- art* t.* •.• .ai ail •• v-*s - :V-.*ru ri. i iu'iiii; awat o•■f th • dr«*a«b ,i, r’; t ai vy “’I'Ui 1 . ' Ni.w. " in- th.it »i , ni • mpij.tcr u; ; pit-ten! fo d*-ny that tin- j>..\ y i r ol ,ri .a i-lost s . by i:i.*-c falling improper - l >v t!i •| 1 ;'«t l -nl ; ib-side* filing depriv.-dhtlu* ~n ~.r health / •:?-I.ri u. th-’ mr'-t , .’.r:-! d*-- i- ns* svinptimi' rn '•■•th b-*dv and i;< l ♦i. 1 T!i<* II Deraiigai. th- PlivSH'ai a.nd M.nt-.i 1 UHC .i, WVAhhm.J. !,>••. •{' L*r ■■>?!'tiv<* I'hh-t. N'-rv-ms liri t\. p_\ np p-d i. p,.!piutir i jr. Kail iM t-* nil* tv* name itgiil number - !'•* i'li'i aiJ-1 '.aujt.iin a > , aU}p. The Dl>C* ’> ~:oaiiH Oarjg ill lus office A CURE WARRANTED IN TWO DAYS. Xo Msr 'itry nr Xnseon* Drurs wlt-n asieep, great nervoiisnesei, being u-d at sudden sou ids. baslifulness, with frequent atfeudi.sl sometimes with derangement of mind, •need immediately. - TAKE PARTICULAR NOTIQE. 1 ,J. address*.** all jthose wrholmve injuml theiuHclvt** ;-upr'>j)er indulgence and solitary habit!*. which ruin body and miudyuiiHttiug them' for either business. society or marriage. ikx: are some of the sad and melancholy effects pro i i i {>>• early habits of y«»uth, viz: Weakness of the - i. nucl Limb*. Pains in the UeAd, Dinu'ess of Sight. »f Xu.icnlnr Power, Palpitation of the Heart. Dye- 'UxTAtLl.—'The tearful effects of the mind-are mucli to L »ss of Memory, Confusion of Ideas, De -iniiitf spirits, Kyil l\nt'lit* r '.n'iul of discovery, deter* him frooj applying to tho<*e •f !'. from education nipj respectability. cim alone be fr -u I him. delaying constitutionalsymptoms of b .rri«l di.ieaae- innke their appearance, such as ulcera te - >r*? throacV disea u it.- of the mouth or cite bone* of the nose full in. and l ':* victim of this awful (li*€**e a b<*rHd «itf**ct of *■■' a uiseratVon. till ileath puts a period tubls dmulfal by sending him t • ’‘that Undiscovered Country whenco no .traveller returns.” . - i l> > * rruta/ieAoftf /oci rl»*t thousand* fall victims to v>: * f-rriblfl dnem*, owing to th* andclUfnthcM of ign«v r - t •truit'o.lera. who. by tin* ti*e of that Deadly Pnitniu Mr',i,y. ruin tUe constitution Hud jmtkc the residue, of 1 • ’•’ , ni«erahl(». STRANGERS i’’n-iitio: your lives. or health to the care of the many r >’ ‘»rn?.l mid Wortlm*** Pretenders, destitute of kn»wl " nntnt* or cli iracter. wh » copy Df Johngton’s adver or Htvto them**!™*, In"ihe newspaper*. regu :l’> i; >,; c , lPl | Vbvsietuus. incnliable of Curing. th*7 keep TmjriJJrna mouth after month. taking their filthy and /'ompnuuds. ,6r as Imi'r as tin* «»i:iilest fee cat in despair. leave yon with rUined health t - Mijh <>T»*r ymir Kulliug disappointment. b 1; J -hn.too m the .*nly Physician advertising. I!.< •nti;ii < >r tiitihunaH always hang In his His r»nißfi*e>» or treatment are nnknown -lip' all o»hcr«. V r " ’' r " 1l a rba great ho»|llt«i« of Kurope. ; ;i " i»i the country and n more extensive private Prac irt Hirni uiv oth<*r Physician in the world. - ’. I'OOISEM -NT Of THE PfffcSS. i m u.y thousand* cured at |hU in«h‘atioo. year after >*sr. oa i tUo numerous! important. Surgical operation* Perform- 1 ijy .Tohn*t‘>n. witnessed by the reporter* of the ~s ‘v‘ “ Clipper.” stiff many otlnr pVpt-r«, notice* of j '* VVfl H lM >f, ar**d‘ay:aTu and again b»fnfl» the pnlvHc, -’“o l-s hi« sran line n* a gontVmen of character anjJ re* •fiDnsi!)illiy. in a>a3l r i c .|ii .guarantee tothaafilicted. v DISEASES SPEEDILY CURED. - o iciu.f, r *iceivfcrihiHg symptoms i«nlI W * n * s b<>u!d be particular In directing their '* * f ‘ his Institution. In the following manner; McCRHM & DERX, I'HLE ALTOONA TRIBUNE. EDITOR* A.VI) PROPRI ETOB.» TERMS OP ADVERTISING ~,S OF k‘B. I *. 4 UUII‘ •.-Mouiil orHiusimy Cards, uuf exceeding 8 lines ; di j«aj>er. per year....„ A. 500 .uurtuiiicatious of a poljticn character ;«riindividual will he charged according to the übuVfi rates. i menu not marked with the number of inser . ii-*ire‘i. will he continued till forbid ami ctarged , to the above l. rtns. ,:u*ui- '-i notice* five cents per line for every insertion. Mtuuty notice exceeding ten lines, fifty cents a square. YOUNG MEN who Imw b> come the victim.' of Solitary Vice. v% N.yfPus Irril ibility. Derangement of the Digee- r tiuctioiib. tie'ueral Debility. Symptom*. <>f Connmup YOUNG MEN MARRIAGE A M- JOHNSTON. «. 0.. Oftha Baltimore Lock Hospital,'.Maryland H. ('. DEUX, FALTER NQT-QUAIL NOT-ON TO Falter not—quail not—on to the'tight. Our cauw* will .ret triumph— we fight for th far. (, hl not for s -oiis—nor tight ye for gain : Hut fight to preserve the flag from the stain Of treason's foul tmiph, nud never again Lot the sword he l.ikf d wi» til! fields of the nlgdn Attest to the world that in earnest we fight. For the cause that roust triumph, because it is right. FALSE ARISTOCRACY, “ I should like to know ' the name of that handsome young fellow who accom panled you to church last Sunday," re marked Clara Mullins, to her amiable and beautiful cousin Maria Helgoland. That’s a pretty question to ask.. Do you imagine 1 am so simple as to tell all I know in this age of secret societies ‘ The next thing you will want an introduction ; hy-nnd-by- you' will set your cap, and who knows but you may steal away my gallant beau, and then leave me alone in the glon of single blessedness,” v “ Now, .Mary, stop poking fun at me. and let’s know the name of that nice young man.” ‘ “Well, Clara, if it will afford you so much gratification as to ascertain his name, I will not be so cruel as to with hold it; here is his card.” “So you adnprc the . name, and think he who wears it personally handsome.” “Yes, Maria. I think he is a’perfect model of a man. How neatly, and yet how plainly He dresses. What a line figure, broad forehead and beautiful eyes he has! Is he a lawyer, doctor, or pro-* lessor, ormerchant, or students What is he?” “ He is a printer.*’ “ A publisher, you mean.” “ No, he picks up types in a newspaper office.” “ O, now I understand you ; you intend to say, that he.is the editor and proprietor of a newspaper.” ** No, my dear cousin, he is a journey man printer.” ; ’ “You don't say he is nothing but a journeyman!” “ How came you, cousin, to allow him to sit up in oitr pew, and beau you home from church ? .1 would not permit a me chanic to touch my arm with a pair of tongs. I tnink you ought to be ashamed of such vulgar’society. I shall inform ma this very day, and so Iqgig as you remain under this roof ? :I am quitc-sure she will not allow that plebean printer to pay any attention to you." • “I declare,” -observed pleasantly. “ you. have given me a Caudle lecture. If that distinguished foreigner who fell in love with you at the museum, and who has been so assiduous in his attentions ever since he an introduction, could have heard you, I have no doubt he would highly commend you for looking down on what die calls the common herd.” “ I Wish you to Understand that Mr. Fitzgmnmon id a real gentleman by birth, and that he has theadvantage of an ample fortune,” continued; Clara.' “ I am heartily sorry, my dear cousin, Shat you encourage tin; addresses of such a : fop. lam sure he -does not display much good breeding; and as for education, he seldom speaks without murdering, his j mother tongue. For my part, I should. . prefer the society of ohe who works for a living, provided he is honeftt, virtuous, sober and intelligent. I have been ac quainted with Mr. Raymond ever since he was a child—indeed we were schoolmates. I know his parents, and although they are poor they are; quite respectable, and have given George a good common educa tion, and die is now occupying his leisure hours in acquiring a knowledge of the languages. Even you admire his personal attractions, and all acknowledge that ibis T|HE FIGHT. UY W. 11l ,\OAt ALTOONA, PA,, TUESDAY, APRIL 14, 1863. j intellectual endowments are far superior I to his physical beauty.” “I am much obliged to you for that ! sermon. Miss Maris! Setlgeland; if does ( not require the assistance of a spy-glass or j microscope to discover the s*.ate of your i feelings in. regard to this vexed question. The truth is vou are envious or jealous, 1 , , * | because I have made an impression on the j heart-of Mr Fitzgamraon, while you can j pick up a poor shiftless fellow, who picks jup letters in a printing office. Ma will i put a stop to your courtship, and if you were at the altar pa would forbid the bans.” The next morning, immediately after breakfast, Maria was requested to go into her aunt's room. She had been seated but a few momenta, when the aristocratic old lady came into the apartment and ol>- ssrved, “ I have been informed that with out my knowledge or consent you have accepted the attention of a young man employed in a printing office." “ Well, aunt,” remarked Maria, blush ing to the temples, “Mr Kaymond came from my native town ; and we have been acquainted ever since we were children.— He is a respectable young man, and a wel come guest in the best circles of society.” “ Well, Miss. I shall put an immediate stop to such an interview as you have with him. You shall not go with him to the theatre nor drink wine with him at partie?.” “ He never ''ues to the theatre and ho. never drinks wine. He belongs to a di vision af the Sons of Temperance.” “ So lie is a cold water rat ! Now 1 hate him more than I did before, and if he ever comes to my house I will drive him away with a broom slick.” “John.” said Mr Mullins to his servant man. “ take this hil/et donx to the hotel where Mr. Fitzgammon boards, and give it to him yourself with my compliments.” It was past nine o’clock, and yet Mr. Filzgaminon was still in the embrace of Morpheus. The waiter, glad to awaken the sleeper, and feed him, so that the dining room might be got in readiness for the next meal, awoke liira at once. He usually spent an hour at his glass, .nn papering his curls, lacing his sfttys, &e. Whilst he was dressing arid decorating his person, John commenced conversation i with an intelligent waiter, who was an i old chum of his. j “ I guess massus is' goin’ to have a party to-night, and this note is to ax the gentle man to attend." “You do not call him a gentleman, I hope. He is as a bear with a sore head, and is more trouble at the fable than any other six boarders in the house. He smells the soup until his moustache dips into it, and then pronounces it unfit for the pigs; he says that the beefstake is tougher than sole leather — the butter as strong as Samson—and the pies and puddings not to be compared to such luxuries in London. We have to be as careful in feeding him as though he were a wild beast, gnashing his teeth on the keeper of the menagerie.” “ Why how you talk, Bob. Miss Clara takes.quite a'si line to him, and she would have thrown a kettle of hot water on you if she heard what you said now.■ I should not wonder if they got' married before long. She says he is the son of a lord.” “ Son of a devil,-more likely.” “ Well, if they should pair olf, after lulling rind cooing a while, I hope he will make Miss Clara stand around, for she has a horrid temper, and Miss Sedge land has to put up with her ill 'htlmor.— She is half the time scolding her because a workman went with her to meeting on Sunday.” “ Are the old folks rich ?” “ They are well to do in the world, but they need not turn up their noses at poor folks,' for -I remember the time when old Mullins couldn't cut such a swath as he does now. He used to keep a barber shop, and had some idea of taking my father j into partnership with him, but’father re fused to have anything to do with the old skin flint. He griped every cent until it squealed, and souq saved enough to go to brokering on a small scale. Folks used to laugh, and say one pole would do for both branches of business. _ Now he uses .soft.soap, and shaves notes,and isashamed. of the more honest and honorable calling of shaving faces. I wish the old man ■ would try his hand on the face of the j dandy who is after his daughter.” | “ Yes, John, I think he could improve his looks, but then if a man makes a beast of himself, I can see no earthly reason why he shouldn’t look like one. 1 believe this stranger who palms himself off as a . distinguished foreigner ts an impudent impostor, without either wit, money or ■ morality; and should he soriy to have him marry your young mistress.” “Well, John, I read books and 'study human nature, and if I am not vastly mistaken, the ill-loooking. ill-natured and'; ignorant foppling of whom we have. been speaking, is a vile fellow, and he i ought to be exposed. I think it would be : a good idea to get Mr. Baymond to publish j him,”; “Do you mean Baymond the printer?” ' “Yes.” [independent nr evebtthing.] “He is the very man that went to church with the lovely and graceful Miss Sedgeland last, Sunday, and Missus has. vowed he shall never- darken her doors again.” •• What an old goose she must be. Mr. Raymond is loved and respected by all who know him. Several of our oldest, mo«t wealthy and influential citizens have clubbed together and raised funds enough to buy a press and types, and have engaged him to edit a newspaper they design to publish. He is the famous author of the thrilling sketches over the initials of H 3-. R.’ “ Miss Clara says she wouldn’t touch, him with a pair of tongs, and that, he is a low fellow, fit only to associate with vulgar people.” “Pshaw! that’s all moonshine. The time may come when she will lie glad to lx? in his company. There is an accom plished and pretty young lady boarding here who gave the mitten to Mr. Fitz gauunon. but she w uld be delighted to have Mr. Raymond except her hand, her fortune.” As John surmised, that very evening there was a grand soiree at the house owned and occupied by the haughty homely Mrs. and the hard-fisted Mr. Mullins. At an early hour, the washed, combed, brushed, curled, dressed, perfumed and decorated Mr. Fitzgammon might have been seen ascending the flight of granite steps, and after spelling out the name engraved on the door plate, pulled the bell with £uch violence that the lap-dog howled with the ear ache, and the servants started in alarm, and the old woman wondered what oil earth was the matter. He was escorted into the pleasant room which was handsomely furnished with the most fashionable furniture. ' Alter being introduced to the company present, he made a low bow, tried to smile, scraped his feet on the carpet, and then awkwardly tumbled like a bale of dry goods on the sofa ; after which he looked up with an air of wondrous wisdom and importance, which seemed to say, “ what think ye of this imported specimen of gentility. lie really was a remarkable looking ob ject. His coarse hair was oiled, curled and scented. He stared at every person in the room through his quizzing glass. He wore on his unintellectual face, mous tache, imperial, whiskers and goatee, looking like an ass that had swallowed a horse, and left the tall sticking out of his mouth. His red carrot fingers were hooped with huge rings, and a broach large enough for a looking-glass stuck upon his ruffled shirt bJiom. Most could have seen at a glance that he was one of those non descript creatures who know but little of themselves externally, except what they learn from the looking-glass, and who know nothing of themselves, internally, except what they feel from the liquor glass. The fallowing conversation be tween the parties will afford an idea of the mental calibre of the distinguished gentlemen. “It is a beautiful evening, sir,” re marked one of the Company. ■ “ Very foine.” “ How do you like our climate, sir ?” “ Very foine.” v “ You have seen the falls of Niagara, I, am told. What do you think “of'that sublime and beautiful water wonder ?” “ It is very foine.” “I think I saw you at the meeting which was recently addressed by the Hon. Daniel Webster; what do you think of his eloquent and magnificent speech ?” “ It was very foine.” “ How do you feel, sir, when excited by the thrilling, electrifying eloquence of our Demosthenes?” “ Very foine.” 1 “ The sensation must be akin to the trumpeting of the storm when the winds do battle. What are yonr sensations during a storm at sea ?” “ I am very sick at the stomach,' at. such times, but when we have a smooth sea and a fair wind, I feel very foine.” The conversation was here interrupted, by the appearance of Mrs. Mullins and her daughter, 'ihey were richly dressed and gorgeously jewelled, and Ciafa, not withstanding the unmistakable lines which ill-temper had traced upon 1 her counte nance, was very, beautiful to Took upon, The moment they entered the room, Mr. Fitzgammon rose from his seat—and squeezed the hand of Miss Clara, and tofo. her she looked lovely, and “very foine.” In the course of the evening, he ventured to say she was a charming girl, fit to be the wife of a lord, and he meant what he said,’pon honor. Maria was present at the party, and her aunt availed herself of an early oppor tunity to ask her how she would like the attention of such a man as Mr. Fitzgam mon. “Best at a distance,” said she, “ I could not endure such a bandbox dandy, whose head is as empty gs his hat.” “ You rude thing, how dare you speak so disparagingly of my company in toy own house ?” “ Why, aunt,: he has been winking at me most impertinently through hi* quiz* zing glags. He is not a gentleman and ought to be requested to leave the house. . If he dues not, by ; your permis sion I will retire to, my room. “ I suppose you are anxious to see the journeyman printer, 1 but if he dares to show his face within reach of a poker, I wi|l drive him into the street. I have a will and a way to punish upstarts who do not know their own place: and have no regard for the higher order of society. At a late hour that night, or rather at an early hour the next rooming, the party, broke up ; but unfortunate Mr. Fitzgam- I mon had partaken too freely of wine, and | sober John was nominated and appointed i a committee of one to lead the eminent | stranger to his lodgings. ! 'I he next day it was rumored in dif | ferent parts of the city, that a lord, duke, knight or earl, or something else had fallen in: love with Miss Mullih, the broker’s | daughter. Maria received a severe caud | ling from her aunt, and ditto from her j dear cousin, because she spoke .sq con ■ temptuously of Mr. Fitzgammun. [ * Miss Mullin’s jealousy induced her to | believe that several young ladies were hot j only smitten but deep in love with the j golden calf she worshipped, and in order to make sure of the idol of her affections, she and her parents went to work in good earnest to bring about a match and have the parties united in matrimonial alliance. The landlord to whom Mr. Fitzgam mon was indebted for board and borrowed money, did not press his claims, for fear he might lose a customer. In a short time arrangements were made for the wedding. Milliners, tailors, shoemakers, and confectioners, were all busy at work. The day selected, the guests were invited, and all the interested parties were on the tiptoe of anticipation, when an event occurred which is related as follows: “Wife, did you see the new paper?” “ Yes, I saw it, but you know as well as I do, that I have no time to read newspapers. Clara is to be married next Monday, and I shall have to be as busy as a dress-maker, oncut a sorry figure at the wedding.” “ But here is a fist pointing to a para graph about Mr. Fitzgammon, the distin guished foreigner.” “ Do read it, pa,” said Clara, smiling, “ 1 knew he would make a noise in the world! A man of his rank in society, having such a princely fortune, and a variety oi accomplishments, such fascinat ing manners and such- superb talents, cannot fail to make a great sensation among the people competent to appreciate his genius. Let us hear it, pa.” “We have received the Loncfon Times.” “ Hear this, ma, the news is from England. I suppose my jealour saint of a cousin, who told me she be lieved somebody to be an imposter, will see her mistake.” Do let me read without interruption, if you please.” “We received, by last night’s mau, a copy of the London Times, which con tained the following Startling and unex pected announcement; ‘John Gammon, who was a servant in the Service of Wm. Fitz, Esq., has robbed hismother of'con siderable 'clothing and jewelry, and it is supposed he has sailed for America. He is about thirty years, of age, of medium size, has dark eyes, coarse curly hair, and a scar on his left cheek, which re ceived from the watchman who arrested him in the act of whipping bis wife. One hundred pounds shall be given to the person who secures the thief.’ Fariy this morning, one of our efficient police offi cers read the announcement and at once put the Fitz and Gammon together, went to j the hotel where he found a sleeping beauty with a scar on his left cheek, and the name ,of Fitz on some silver spoons in his trunk. He awoke and arrested Mr. Gam mon, and escorted hint to jail.” Clara fainted when she heard the sad tidings, and after she came to her senses, she 1 exclaimed: “O, ma, O, pal—what shall I dot My dresses me made, gur friends are invited, everybody will laugh at ine! I wish I could be shut up in a nunnery. What a villain he j must be,” said Mrs. Mullin. “He has a wife now living, he luia been stealing I shouldn’t wohder if he stole that silver spoon off the mantle-piece, fur I missed it the day after he first called here, t hope the authori ties will bang him by the neck until he is choked to death.” “ Mr. Mullins, who is the editor of that paper t” “ Mr. George Raymond.” “I wonder if that is the young man who gallanted Maria to meeting that Sunday?” V “I suppose it is,” said Mr. Mullins. “ Well, go apd ask him ‘concerning the particulars of this angular and most un happy affair.” Hr. Hollins went to the office and en quired if Mr. Raymond was in. 7‘ No, sir,” was the answer; “he has gojao to the Stale House!. He has re cently been elected to the Senate, and consequently spends much of his time in the Senate Chamber.” :Is this Mr, Raymond the young man EDITORS AND PROPRIETORS. who used to work in the brick building \ across the wayt” “Y 59, sir.” “ When he returns, give my compli ments to him, And Say my name is . Mul lins, and that; all the members of my family would be happy to see him.” Mr. Mullins returned and informed the family that the journeyman ’ printer had become not-only an editor, but also a prominent member of the Senate, and that the news respecting Mr. Fitzgammon was also too true. The intelligence spread like wild fire through the city, and offered a .rich feast for tale bearers and scandal mongers, and those who cany the devil’s mail bag from door to dopr, had their hands, hearts and mouths full for a fortnight. The Hon. Mr. Raymond—the low born journeyman—the plebian printer who belonged to the vulgar herd-called fre quently to see the beautiful Maria Sedge land ; and although Clara set her cap for him, and tried all the skill of an, expe rienced coquette, she failed to win the printer, who became the happy husband ofjjaria Sedgeland. Clara improved in wisdom as she-advanced in years, and finally became the contented wife of .a worthy, respectable man, who worked as a pressman in Mr. Raymond’s office. MAXIMS FOB FAEMEBB. Never enlarge your farm, when that you now own is not half cultivated. Do not buy fancy stock and pay fabu lous prices, on the spur of the moment, or without knowing why you want* it, and bow you are to make the investment profitable. Do not keep poor stock when yon can keep good at the same expense, and with four times the profit. ' If you have a good location, do not sell out, expecting to better it, because you are offered a good price. Be present with your hands as much as possible, otherwise little work will be lone, and that poorly. No business re quires the muster's oversight more than tanning. Cultivate a little well rather than much poorly. Who does not remember the farmer who had two daughters t When the first one married, he gave her ope third of his vineyard, and yet he had as many grapes as formerly; when the second married, she took half the remainder for her portion, and yet the yield of the father’s share Was not lessened. Keep ahead of your work, or your work will keep ahead of you. Invent your surplus earnings in making such improvements as will add to the profit, appearance and convenience of your farm. Be kind to those you employ, and to all the animals you work. Sell your produce when prices are high; and if you do not need the money, keep it when they are very low, , tinless it is cer tain they will remain so. Make your|»lf thoroughly, .acquainted with the principles of' agriculture, ami be guided by them. .Bead, travel* and ob serve. ■ 1 .' Take care of your tools when you get through using them, and do not work with poor ones when you can afford good ones. Do not buy old wagons, plows, har rows, etc., at auction, because you think they are cheap,'as it will not pay. Do not beep more stock on your farm than you have plenty of pasture for. N If at Iforty-five you have Si fair property, J 0 not work with your muscles so hard'as but save the afternoon'of eajch day for mental and social improvement. Give your children a good education— physically, intellectually, morally and eociahy. ■ j Use machinery and horse powef, where possible, instead of human muscle. In ail you do, if yon would work tot ad vantage, endeavor to get. bold of the long end of the lever instead of the short one. Tenacity of Life*—A. few evenipgs since there was a learned dissertation*— subject: “ Bed-bugs and their Remarka ble tenacity of life.” One asserted of bis own knowledge that they could be boiled and then come to life. Some hgd soiied them for hours in turpentine without any fatal consequences. Old Hanks, who bad been listening as an outsider, here gave in bis experience in corroboratiop of the facts. Says he: Some years ago Itook a bed-bug to an iron foundry, and drooped it into a ladle where the melted iron was, had it ran into a 'skillet. Well, my old woman used that skillet pretty constant tor the last six years, and here the other day it got broke all to smash, and what do you think, gentleman, that ’ere. insect just walked out of bis hole, where be |«ad been layin’ like a frog in a rock, and'made tracks for bis old roost upstairs. Bit,” added he, by the way of of parenthesis, “ he Ipoked mighty pail” •9* It be contended, without danger of lnTtmiptii wo«t eSfectind labor saying that has ererbssa invented. -' ; T ♦ NO. 11