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i- nil commuted •jjjjtjjJ™'
from *uinfe« an UiinsKSgi
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in the WasOuic Xeraplr, «5,x-
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received ftijm TOlllK : j4S* ».
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for the niquUltf rtyi*
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liecomn a unirernl tatoette,* 7 -
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. . Joseph u. BOflwrr
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lurgeons, at ■
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veen in hriwiu ti>!Sh . ■
all other#. : ;"
—].i percent/catoff tothe 3■-
<•• addressedvto , '< • ■ vs i
tXEKOAD. Proprietor,* r
•oils till—Henry ■’ LdnytfSw
end all j^M^
•uorrhan or I*efiWfeHM
. >uul N ( rtpM-Oprfto|Ji|C
n -riafte generally, tiy ‘ .
B. DC LANKY.M.D'.
i 1 iri -‘Y »- r ■—mfTiinie,
t and scilitode-of MMeMM
I' MKDICIKK, ialn
‘■’.id ilir entirely newnaj SSi
L.iopted by the Antbor.
' every one is enabnd ionte
sjsgstss** 1 *
1 T •■* Vl#
f SIAN!Ty; l^D
d take* thia aneckeffanaftm i
Humanity. ;. ■ »■» *9*;-
recta on afriend of ,WMkWU
rom a neuralgic affectonwHlh
lil to the painful
iruitca the patient jraAggw#,-
* from pain and continued M,
I am wiUin*^iatfi||gM;fe
• lil cured iK
> publish * KeW
«.r - -•■ r r-ijiii'. •
Hi. Hotel*, Store*, Mra Ijaiu-.
rectory, giving the mum and
* ill he engraved on OA mSf
» mitshle tcolo eaastdJsalt
>. which wUlbecol«daaA
id delivered to eqbedvnett «t
-keeps constantly MK MI
)* lh, varnish-
nod ft deal ra termer .upp
er and quality, he hope* la
niilic jatronags. d ' \ ■•
-lully rumpovndad.' p-»t
T Crime *nd CrtminnlM* An
wl.ly circulated tbroMM*
the Gn-at Trial*, Cttoto*J'
ters, not tabfIWRIBUV .
mum; $1 for sU month*,t*
Iro should irrito th•^^-^Si••*• ,
i * York.PoJlce o*Vj|fe,' -■
S AT - v -\
etc. at fair rote*,
end promptly t»enjcww.
it store of j.
m - *. -
LYE, FO& MA'
f> WfhjßfejjS ■
soap; Guta* mm*"*
j.il and tot wteJ^p^
I, WbofeMle •a&S Sir ‘ .
HcOBUa & BERN,
* BSffl, hW«wi and ProprUtOT*.
fnayabla Invariably >in adfame.) J3JO;,
at the expiration ofthetlme
lUpoP** l u
r fSSSF 2 do. \ * do.
rrlT '» is ;is
tvw aid lex than three month., 25eentapw.
H*»r«(or»eh insertion. Cmonthl. -1 year.
$ l s 6o $ 3.00 | 6 OOt
gx line* tir In*, J5O 4roo t Oft;
QaaiqiiaN, 400 *ooir 10‘00,
J*9 “ 500 840 *l2 OOS
BlX** 000 10«0» >l4 00
Bw*. low M«L. !»00’
Haifa column, 14 00 S5OO 40 00
ONd*> n»‘ exceeding 8
oSSmStoaSiufifa political ehwnctoroilndividualln-
according to tboaborewte..
**** *r.‘ 5m marked with the nnmber of inmUona
tfll fcrbld aadeharged according
LScoHlvo «u‘» P«r line tor every insertion,
notice* exceeding ton line*, fifty ceatsneqoare.
CHURCHES, MINISTERS, &C.
tofotman, £er. A B. Cum, Pastor.—Preaching ev
arfßabSuh morning at lOWo’clock, and in the evening at
TUoWaik Sabbath School at 9 o'clock, A. M., in the Lcc
totioom. Prayer Meeting every Wednesday evening in
tk« ttaa room* _ . , _ _
jtoAodiif Bpiteopal, Rev. 8. A. WnsOH, Pastor.—Proach
fcfMerr Sabbath morning at 11 o’clock and In the even-
H BabUtU School in the Lecture Boom at 2 o'clock, P.
It General Prayer Meeting In same room every Wednes
ty analog. Young. Men'* Prayer Meeting every Friday
toagdial Lutheran, Be v. Jacob Stsck, Pastor.—Praacb
ij, etet » Sabbath morning at o'clock, and at 9J< o'clock.
Ittlia evening. Sabbath School in the Lecture Koem at
mr o'clock, P. M. Prayer Meeting in same room every
Cnittd Brethren, iter. D. Speck, Pastor.—Preaching ev
en Sabbath morning at 10 ]4 o'clock ,and In the evening at
tU o'clock. Sibbath-School in the Lectoro Room at 9
*loel, A. M. Prayer Meeting every Wednesday evening
in mine room.
PnlaUnt Kpiwnpai, Bov. B. W. Outer, Pastor.—Divine
bides 2d and Ith Sundays of each month at 10J4 o'clock
LM, sod P. M. Sunday School at 9 o'clock A. M.
OeUulic, Bev. Jons Tvrioos, Pastor;—Preaching at 10%
(’dock in the morning, and at 3J< id the afternoon.
BafUtU B. 11. Pish, Pastor—Preaching every Sabbath
noning at 10U o'clock, and also in the evening. Sabbatli
School st 9 o’clock, A. M. Prayer Meeting every Wednes
bj * toning. '
jjriean iltthodUU Bov. Bhtser Car, Pastor.—Preaching
itocy Sabbath morning st 11 o'clock-oad In tboevenlhg, In
dll eld Union School llouso. ‘
ALTOONA MAIL SCHEDULE.
IMwn ThroaxU M»U
laeters Through Mall,
Offlc# opBD for the tromsction of btuiaee* from 7 A. M.
k»P-M, dorlag tli* w*»k, and from (to 8 o’clock, A. M.
June 4, ’67-lf] JOHN SHOEMAKER, P. M.
Intm Train Bast arrives A. M, leave* 7,10 A. M.
4 “ West " “ “ 8,65 “
fat “ Hast « 9,30 P. M. « 10,10 P.M.
“ ■ West “ 1,26 A. M, « 1.30 A. M.
M*U “ Knit “ 11,30 “ « 11,30 »“
“ “ West “ WBP.M., “ TgOO P. M.
The nOLLIDATSBURO BRANCH connect* wlthJExprea*
train But sod. West, and with Mall Train Kant amTWeit.
Bis BLAIRS VILLR BRANCH connects with Johnstown
■*T Train East and Wait, Express Train West and Mall
Joroaber 29,1858. THOB. A. SCOTT, Sup't.
MEETINGS OF ASSOCIATIONS.
avmiain Ledge, A. Y. M-, Na 2SI, meets pn second Taes
«l of each month. In the third story of the Masonic Tom
pis, at V/i o’clock, P. M. i
Bnralam Encampment, A. T. M„ No 10, meoU on ths
»nrta Toewtay of each mouth, in the third story of the Ma
sonic Temple, at o’clock, P. M.
Lodge, I. O. of 0. f.. No. 473, meet* every Friday
*l«k PM**' * CCOD< * **° Masonic Temple, at 7
. HZ* l ? l f d 9 t ’ Ivo - 0. F-, No. 632, meets ev-ryFrlday
■ uS, .S toe Morr of Patton’s Building, on Virginia
1 o’clock, p. M. 1
Tra>e > No. 36, I. 0. R. M., hold stated Conn
awning In the I. 0.0. F. Hall, In the
■wale Tempi*. Council Fire kindled at 7th mn Soth J
At>AMS, C. of R. [June 26, *B7-ly ,!
Ur America, Camp No. 31. meets every Mon
“yHht in the third story of Patton’s Hall, at o’clock
Oxmp, Xo. 54, J. S. qf A., meets every
JUZ* to tto» 2d story of Patton’s Hall.
Ah. 311, & of T, metis every Batnr
* ™D D §^,Sth 2d HLS* 0t P * tton ’ 8 I^L B ’ *• RoB9 >
-Library and Beading Rtxm Astoeia
rr on tot Saturday erenlngln Janua-
October. Bond of Dlrecto# meet on
*t*iorf U r*T^^ T ® n tog ta.,e«ch month. Bomniopan from
“ "•oek arery evanlhg,Cßnnday except^!)
f* Hon. George Taylor.-
Attorns*—B*nJ. B. HewlL
M. Confer, 3. R. MePar
“•L Rno* M. Jones. : \
clerk to Cottmietionen— Hugh A. Caldwell.
•vcmOb. Appndttr - Joeeph O. Adlnm.
Arosyor—James L. Gwlnn. -
A«Wor*-S;jfa«pir, A.C. Jtfc&rtnty, Joa JL Hewith
tortiur—vraom Tot. '
ALTOONA BOROUGH OFFICERS
3SS" J, M-Cben?.
iC? H. McCormick, John
S^ a J v Loirther.
PAtton, C, B. Sink, 0. C
i®- Thomw, ThOo. McMlnn.
* ' u *«* “ Jacob Good;
fcyeetorv-fcurt “ Alexander; B|Ung. J
: S 3, r'fl££^2SSS y :
Vn, TMeßttae. Wmi BiwC^
-■•***' *>•» wetted
*2*»t the I wbleb trill be
**° who l i le * 8 ’. wholfleele The
“fwonlj- . ' CDec. Kr. tt
' ™ tS> VP*
n no ki'^u
u oo a. u. *&d «oo r:x.
■8 36 A.M.
U‘Bo A. M.
6 40 P,K.
11 COX. M. and 6 SO
LUrt brightest of-ri»lon», la brightest of hour*.
’With grtwp laares unfolding, and beautiful Cower*,
With the gammer light gleaning on bower and tret,
:And the «ong oftbe bird and the hum of the boe,
* Como Ada
the broecea that come with her Hnpleta to p4y,
Were eweet with-the breath oftbe newly-mown haf,
We matbytbe brook side to wander alone, [otjn.
WJare 1 elaepcd her white hand, where I called jker my
Howwanujetheeiadif aretbe ekiee.
And fair in theetreamlet tho hill-shadow Uoj,
Aud i hear thaaoft "flow of the waters again,
Bat I wait and Watch, and I listen in rain—
Faraway In tbc chnrch-yard * grar* mound ia mad>,
Whars the white milrbl* gleams in the willuwtnasjihade,
And vbrowdad tn silence and darkness below.
And pale and as cold as the last whiter* snow,
Uded ||fts cdlanjr.
«CAi>T AFFORD pT.»
A SKETCH OP EVERT DAT UPE.
Can’t afford it, Maria.’
‘ But you might if you would only think
so Walter,’ plead young wife.
‘I can’t do it,’ the husband returned,
very emphatically. 4 lt would cost two
or three dollars, at the yery lowest, to put
up such a gate and the old bars will an
swer every purpose.’
f No, they won’t, Walter. The neigh
bor’s children very often leave the
bars down, and then stray cattle cor»e into
the garden. We may loose more than the
price of a gate in one hour if a cow jhoald
happen to get in when I am away.’
4 1 should like to know who. leaves the
bars down,’” Said ■ Waiter, very thijeaton
ipgly. ‘The same children might leave
a gate open.’
' ‘But we can hare a gate made to; close
of its own accord, with a weight; or a
spring,’ suggested the wife. 4 John S'ilea
has had a gate put up in his yard.’
‘But 1 aip’t Johh Niles* my dear.’
Walter wished his wife to remember.
0 'SO AiM.
> 1 But Ms family ia as large as yours, and
his wages are not so high.'
‘ Never mind about that. I tell you I
can’t afford it—at any rate, not a\ present.'
And with this Waiter started iff to his
■ . Walter Gray was a young ma>, about
thirty; an industrious mechanfy; had
been married some eight years; aid had
an interesting family. He mean tit o pro
vide well' for those who depended upon
him, and in a measure he did so. But
there were many little comforts, which, at
times they really needed, and in
the end might have proved a source of
saving,* And more to it might hav* ad
ded to his happiness, had he felt aHe to
grant these little requests. But he
couldn’t afford it:—at least so he thought;
gind whether he thought so with sonnd
judgment the sequel will show.
. The gate which his wife had beenso
anxious to,have put up, Was needed at the
entrance to the garden, back of the house,
where there was only a pair of short bars.
The children often came' through there,
and sometimes - left the way open behind
them. In short, there were many wayi
in which those bars were apt to be left
down, and Maria Gray had very often to
leave her work to drive out the cattle that
got in. It was only by extreme watch
fulness on her part that the garden vtas
preserved. x She had spokeu several times
to-, her husband about it, but he felt
that he couldn’t afford it. She mnst kef.p
her eyes upon the spot, and see that the
bars were kept shut.
.Only a few days after this, Mrs. Gray
asked her husband if he was going to hire
a pew in the church for the following year,
and he told her that he did not think be
‘But you can hire half of one. We
can have half of Mr. Niles’ pew for five
‘ I can’t afford it; ? was Walter's reply.
‘ I should get no great good from the
meetings, any way.’
‘Bon’t say so, husband. Suppose cv
ery|>ody should feel like that. You cer
tainly,Wouldn’t wish to live, and bring up
your children where there were no relig
ious influences. And if you reap the
benefit of good Christian institutions, you
certainly ought to feel willing tp help to
support them/ j
[ ‘So I would be' willing, if I could af
ford it; hut I can’t/
Mrs. Gray looked ,vciy serious, and
.seeped to hesitate as though there yfjsis
a subject upon her mind, which she felt
deshpafcc about broaching } but it had oc
cupied her thoughts too long and! she de
termined to let it out,. \
‘Walter/she said, a little tremulous,
but still resolutely,, ‘.ypu have ten dollars
a week/ ' '
‘Andbow much of that does it take to
fted us/ '
W“IOSS 100188 I. TICZBOT.
BT BILTAKCB COBB, JB.
V.. 1 ■
» » 4 }
‘ I don’t know, I’m sure. I only know
that it takes;it all to feed and clothe us
and pay up the interest on the house.’
‘lhaynt had a new dress since last
tall; and I was reckoning up yesterday
how much we had spent for the children,
and I found It to be only fifteen dollars
for tlie last tjto months. I have forked
over some of cousin John's clotlies for
Charles, andlLuciiida jumps into Mary’s
dresses as the latter outgrows them.
‘That’s all very well,’, replied Walter,
a little testily. “ I understand my own
business, and I know just what I can af
ford and what I can’t,. While I have the
payments to j make on my house, I must
economize —l mitst economize /’ he re
peated, very decidedly.
‘ And I would have you ecomomize, re
turned the wife; but do not forget that all is
not economy which we may call so. I think
that to hire half of John Niles’ pew
would be a source of economy in comfort
Oud lasting good. It would be five dollars
laid out to a good advantage— sure* to re
turn a heavy interest to us and our chil
dren. And I think it might be a. source
of great saving to pnt up a good gate at
‘Stop!’ interrupted Walter, with a
nervous motion. ‘ You’ve said enough
about this, I know my means.’ °
‘ Lei me say one word,’ urged Maria.—.
Iherc was an earnestness in her tone
which caused her husband to stop and
listen. ‘lf yojn will give me five dollars
a week, I will agree to furnish all the pro
visions for the houshold, and clothe my
self and children. I will do this for one
year. That will leave you three hundred
and sixty dollars with which to clothe
yourself and tmake- your payment on tlie
house. On the house you have -only to
pay a hundred doMiyrs, with interest for
two years, which will leave you a hundred
and forty-eight dollars for your clothes
and —other expenses.’
Walter was upon: the point of denying
this result of the case, but he saw, upon a
moment's reflection, that from his wife’s
statement, the deduction was correct, so
he denied the -esatement.
‘lou cannot furnish the food, and
clothe yourself and children, for the sum
you have named,’ he said.
Thereupon Maria sat down and made
know a few facts to him that had been
hidden within the mysteries of her own
housekeeping. She was not long in prov
ing to him that during the past year, the
items of expenditure within said limits had
not averaged five dollars per week,
Walter said ‘ popb !” and then he ad
ded ‘nonsense V and then he left the
‘ There mast be some mistake/ he said
to himself, after he had pot away from the
house ; and he really believed there was
‘ Have a glass ofjSoda, Bill ? Come Tom
•p-have a glass ?’
‘ Don’t caro if I do/ said Tom and Bill
‘ Have some, Ned ?’
And Ned said, yes. So the clerk pre
pared four glasses of soda, for which Wal
ter Gray paid twenty-five cents.
‘ Let’s have a game of ‘seven up for the
oysters,” said Bill, after the day’s work
was done. ,
The game was played, and Walter lost,
so he paid a dollar for four oyster suppers
—suppers which none of them needed,
and which did them more harm than good.
‘ Have a cigar, Waller?’ asked Tom,
Walter said yes; and in return he paid
for four glasses of a}e.
_ One evening they met, after work, and
Ned proposed that they should ' toss up’
to see who should pay lor the chowder.
‘Come John, —won't you come in ? ! he
said addressing John Niles who stood by..
‘No—guess not,’was John’s reply.
1 You’d better. Its only for the chowd
er —for five if you come in.’
‘ 1 can’t.’
‘ It’s of no use to ask him/ spoke Wal
ter, in rather a sarcastic tone. ‘He don’t
spend his money in that way.’
* John’s face fiushhd, and his lips trem
bled, but he restrained the bitter words
which were struggling upon his tongue,
and turned and left the shop.
‘ He’s a moan fellow/ cried Tofu, loud
enough for Niles to,hear him.
‘Tight as the bark of a tree,’ added
Walter in a tone equally loud.
John Niles heard the remarks, but did
not come back.
The four remaining men ‘ tossed up’„
and the lot fell upon Walter and Tom.
Then they ‘ tossed it off,’ and it fell
upon Walter, 'who paid four shillings for
the chowder. ' - :
Walter started for home about nine o’-
clock, and on his way lie was overtaken
by Niles. x
‘Walter,’ said the latter in a kind but
earnest tone, ‘X want to speak with you.
You have wronged fee this evening, ■ and
I wish you to understand' me. For the
Opinion of BilX Smith and Ned Francis,
I care not, but I do not wish you to mis
apprehend me. We;live too near together,
ana I would not loose your gojd opinion.’
ahead,* returned Walter,
who was sensiWoof iho fact that his com
panion was ope of jthc best kindest
neighbors in the world- W ,; v
‘You sap] I was mean.’
ALTOONA, PA., THURSDAY, FJiMmtKT 3, 1859.
[INDEPENDENT in everything.] 1
‘ No, no, —’twas not I who said that.’
‘ Well, you said I was ‘ tight as the bark
of a tree.”
Walter could not deny this, so John
. ‘ I refused to join you in your little
game for three reasons, either one of which
would have been sufficient to deter me.
: I have resolved not to engage in
any such games of hazard. Second : I
did not want any chowder. And third : 1
could not have afforded to pay for five
extra suppers, if the lot had fallen upon
‘ Couldn’t have afforded it ?’ replied
Walter, with a slight tinge of unbelief in
‘No/ returned the other, ‘I could not.
I used to be on hand for any such game,
and I thought it ’twould be mean to refuse,
but I have learned better. Let me tell
you how I first came to see the folly of
being afraid to spend my money for noth
ing. Shall I tell you V
4 Certainly/ returned Walter, who al
ready began to see something.
‘/\\ell, pursued Niles, ‘ one noon, as I
was going away from home, my wife asked
me lor a dollar. She wanted it to buy !
some cloth with. I esked her if she could j
not get along without it. 1 bad only '
three dollars with me, and I hated to let j
one of them go. She said she really need
ed the cloth, but if £ hadn’t the money
she could wait. I knew she was disap
pointed, but I thought she could tret alon**,
and I went away. That evening we went
into a saloon, and we hagl a fine sociable
time. It cost me just one dollar and a
hall. I paid the money willingly—with
out even a thought ol objection—and then j
1 went home. When 1 entered tho hall. 1
I heard wy wife trying to pacify our old- I
cst Oaild. ’1 he h;tle thing had expected,
a new dress which Lad been promised her,
and felt badly because she had not got it.
‘ urged my wife, as the child
sobbed in her disappointment. ‘ Papa
hasn’t got the money now ; but he’ll have
some by-and-by, and then you shall have i
a new dress. Poor Papa has to work Lard.
‘The words smote me to the heart. 1
could not afford a dollar to dress my little
child, but'could afford any amount fur the i
useless entertainment of others. The dol- i
lar which I could not got when she asked !
for it, I paid almost twice-fold for nothing. •
Dut it learned me a lesson. 1 opened uiy j
eyes and I have kept them open. On the j
very next morning I offered mv wife the j
dollar, but 1 could not afford anymore for
the beer man. 1 had not dreamed how
much I was wasting, but when i stopped
up the leak, and allowed my funds to flow
into their proper channel, I soon found
I could afford every reasonable comfort mv
wile and children needed. So £ stick to !
the principles-which proved so beneficial j
to myself and family. All ! what's that i
There's an animal in your garden V,’alter.’ I
They had reached the garden fence, and j
by the dim starlight, W alter could sec a ■
horned besst trampling among hi.; sweet j
corn. The barfc had cither been left down
or hooked down, and a stray cow had got
in. They drove her cut, and then Niles
went home. Walter saw that the beast
had done considerable damage, but he was
not angry, for he had something of more
importance to think of He went and sat I
down beneath an apple tree, and pondered, j
‘Bless me, if she hasn’t put the case j
down about square !’ he said to himself at j
the end of some minutes meditation. I
‘ Let me see,’ he pursued, there's sixty
seven cents for chowder—fifty cents for
ale—fifty cents for soda. And that's
within the last three days. A dollar and
sixty-seven cents. Is it possible 1 Over
a hundred dollars a year! and yet I can’t
afford two dollars for a gate, nor five dol
lars that my family may have religious
instruction for a year! Walter Gray—
■l think you had better turn over a neic
And Walter Gray did turn over a new
leaf. On the next day he did two things
thereby astonishing his wife ; and refused
to toss up for the ale, and thereby aston
ishing a crowd of expectant thirsty ones.
For a month he pursued this course, and
by the expiration of that time he could
fully appreciate the blessings that were
dawning upon him. lie discovered that he
could afford everything that the comfort
of his family demanded : and in arriving
at this result, he had only to cut loose
those things which he really could not af
ford; It was a wonder to him how he
oould have been so foolish. When at the
end of the year he had paid his note, and
had ninety-twordollars left, he felt at and
as if there must be some mistake : but
when his wife went over the household
expenditures with him, and showed him
that all they needed had been bought-and
paid for, he saw just how it was. He saw
that for years he had been wasting his
substance; and depriving himself and
loved ones of the comforts they needed—
hot intentionally, hut through the same
mistake that leads thousands into the same
course. But he did so no more.
Sometimes even now, Walter Grny
says-r-‘ Can't afford it,' and he snys it
verr too, but it is not wben
bis Wife and children ask for comfort and
joy, nor yet wben the needy poor ask for
J “dp and e’ vrity—for he can afford all
' ' \
that; but it is when the wild speculation,
or the loose companion, ask him to engage
in some game of hazard which may rob
himself and family of their substance.——
1 hen he says—and he repeats it if need
be. ‘ Can’t afford it.’
There floated about the pipers a story
of a Cincinnati couple who; had not ex
changed a word during twenty years of
married life. They were not mutes, how
ever. The' Baltimore Dispatch tells of a
similar instance : —The parties were weal
thy and highly respectable. They had a
numerous family of children, who had
grown up and were all in flourishing cir
cumstances, and troops of grand-children,
who frequently visited them. I They were
falling into the sere and yellow leaf, and
were both tottering to the tomb at the
age of nearly eighty; but, though they
had lived under the same roof, eaten at
the same table, entertained the same
friends, received 1 ' together the frequent
visits of their children and grand-children,
they had not interchanged a word for for
Jo almost every one the cause was a
mystery, and an impenetrable onej for
neither husband nor wife would bear from
any person the slightest allusion to thei
subject. \et there was one, an old ser
vant, ahpost ds old as her master and mis-,
? ho know, but kept the secret!
faithfully. It was whispered, however*
that jealousy was the cause;’ The hus
band had found in tho possession of his;
wile some letters from a former suitor
that she had heedlessly, perhaps thoughts
lessly preserved. Impetuous; and unjust!
accusations followed. The indignant wife'
told her jealous husband she would never
speak to him again, but for the sake of !
her children would not leave him. She 1
kept her word with persistent obstinacy,
and ho followed the same course. They
appeared absolutely indifferent to each
At length the old man died. Tho wife
had not come near him in bis last sick
ness, and she even came not to look upon
his corpse until they were about closing
■ho coffin, and bearing him from the house
m which they had dwelt so singularly to
gether for nearly half a century, when,
with a firm though feeble step she entered
the room, walked up to the coffin, gazed
a few moments at his features, now mo
tionless in death, and, without a word, a
tear, or even a shadow of an expression on
her wrinkled face, went back, unassisted,
to her appartment. The funeral took
place, and duribg the absorbing proceed
ing? of the time, she was left alone. After
the funeral cortege had departed, and was
out of sight, the old servant repaired to the
room of her mistress. She noticed she
was sitting very still in her chair, looking
apparrently out of the window. Seeing
her continue motionless, shd spoke to herp
there wijs no answer. She went to her
—shi was dead !
A Speech on Scolding Wjvos.
At a Young Men’s Debating Society,
somewhere out in Illinois, the question of
discussion was, “ Which is the greatest
ev)J —a scolding wife or a smoking chim
ney/” After the appointed disputants
had concluded the debate, a spectator rose
and begged the privilege of making a few
remarks on the occasion. Permission
being granted, he delivered himself in
this way :
“ Mr. President—l've been almost mad
listening to the debate of these youngsters.
They don’t know anything about a scold
ing wife! Vvaittyi they have had one
upwards of eight yeaps. .and hammered
and jammored aiicKjawed ‘at all the while
wait until they have been be
cause the fire wouldn’t burn, because the
oven was too hot, because the cow kicked
over milk; because the sun shined,
because the hens didn’t lay, because the*
butter wouldn t come, because arc
too soon for dinner, because they arc one
minute too lute, because they slapped the
young ortes, because they tore their brow
sers or because they did anything, (wheth
er they could help it or not,) before they
begin to talk of the evils#of a scoldin'*
wife ; why, Mr. President, Fd rather hear
the clatter of hammer and stones, and
twenty tin pans, and nine brass kettles,
than a din din of a scolding wife. Yes
sir-ee, them’s my sentiments/ To my
mind, Mr. President, a smoky chimney is
no more to be compand to a scolding wife
than a little negro it, to a dark ni£ht.”
Advice Gn.vffs. —Every naan ought
to pay bis debts, jf ho can; evero man
ought to help his' neighbor, if he can ;
every man ought to get married, if he can;
every man should do hisfwork to suit his
customers, if be can. Every irifo should
please her husband, if she Can; every
wife should sometimes hold her tongue, if
she can; every lawyer should sometimes
tell the truth, if ho can ; every naan ought
to mind bis own business, and -let other
people’s alone, if he can, ,1
S&- “This is net gain,” as the spider
said when he eaUght a fly.
A Silent Couple.
editors and proprietors.
We copy the following true andhuoxO
rons description of modesn dancing from
the pen of a ready writer, who already en
joys an enviable reputation as an author:
Look I look!” said a half dozen lady
voices one pretty, night, as we sat leaning
against the the'ball room. We
did look—alas f for bur poor modesty,
ought not to have done so. (( If my chil
dren were among them, I’d whip
well for it. Yes, it they were full grown,
I’d give them the hickory.” So said the
wife of one of our princess, as she turned
away in utter disgust. ,
Doctor, let .mo describe a little— if the
public may look, certainly it may read,
though it run. A group of the splendid
ones is on the floor, and lovingly mated.
The gents encircle their partners waists
with one arm. The ladies and gentlemen
stand closely face to face. The gents are
very erect and lean a little I|ack. The la
dies lean a little forward (Music.) Now
all wheel and whirl, circle and curl.—
Feet and heels of gents go rip-rap, rip-rap
rip. Ladies feet go tipifcy-tip, tipity-tip
tip. Then all go rippity, clippity, Uppity,
hippity,! skippity, hoppity, jumpity, enm
ity, thump. Ladies fly oft" by centrifugal
momentum, Gents pull ladies hard and
close. They reel, swing, slide, sling, look
tender, look silly, look dizzy. Feet, fly,
tresses fly, hoops fly, dresses fly, all fly.
It looks tuggity, huggity, pullity, squeez
ity, pressity, mbbity, rip. The men look
like a cross between steelyards and “ lim
ber jacks,” beetles and jointed X’s. The
maidens tuck down their chins very low,
or raise them exceedingly high. Some
smile, some grin, some giggle, some frown,
some pout, some sneer, and all sweat, free
ly - Ihe ladies are brought against breast,
nose against nose, and toes against toes.
Now they go again, making a sound like
gaorgy, porgey, derey, pecry, ridoy, pidey,
coachy, poachy. •
This dance is not much hut the extra#
arc glorious. If the men were women,
there would be no such dancing. But
they arc only men, and so the thing goes
on by woman’s love of it. When a boy,
we used to visit these Dutch dances, and
trip the whirling beer barrels, as they pas
sed our feet, and then run for dear life.
W e still feel the instinct of tripping in
our toes. A secular writer says : There
is no established standard of propriety
about this matter. If I were a lady, I
might object to these dances; but being
a man 1 do not. We certainly ought to
be satisfied if they are.”
How to go to Bed.— Hall’s Journal
of Health, in -peaking on this subject
“In freezing Winter time do it in a
hurry, if there is no fire in the room, and
there ought not to be unless you are quit®
an invalid. But if a person is not in good
health it is best to undress by a good fire,
warm and dry the feet well, draw on the
stockings again, run into room without a
fire, jump jnto bed, bundle up, with'head
and cars under cover for a minute or
more, until you feel a little warmth; then
uncover your head, nest draw off your
stockings, straighten out, turn over on
your right side and go to sleep. If a
sense ot ch illness comes over you on get
ting into bed, it will always do you an in
jur y 5 its repetition increases the ill
effects without having any tendency to
harden you. Nature ever abhors vio
lence. We arc never shocked into good
health. Hard usage makes no garment
A poor man, some of whose family
w_re sick, lived near Deacon Murray, and
occasionally called at his house for a sup
ply of milk. One morning, after family
worship, the Deacon invited him to go
out to the barn with him. When they
got into the yard, the Deacon, pointing to
one of the cows, exclaimed: “Thei*,
take that .cow, and drive her houu..”—
The map thanked him Jhoartly for the cow,
and statted for home j but the Deacon fas
observed to stand in the attitude of deep
thought, until the man had gone sonic
rods. He then looked op, and called out,
“ Hey, bring that cow back.” The man
looked around, and the Deacon added,
“ Det that cow come back, and you dome
back too;” He did so, and when became
into the yard again, the Deacon said;—
“ There take your pick out of tf»e cowq ;
I ain't a going to lend to the Lord the
poorest cow I'vc got. iy
BS&- A Scotch Duchess wig examining
the children of one of her charity schools,
when the teacher put the question-*-*
“What is the wife of a king.called?” “X
queen.” “ The wife of an ctnperior f*
“An express,” was replied with equal
readiness. “Then what is a wife of a
duke called?” /A drake,” exclaimed
several voices, mistaking the title “ duke”
for “ the duck.”
t&* “ I never complained ofm*; <jobd*-
says the Persian poet,
once, when my feet
W ttohoy to buy aboes; bat I m*t Mqpr;
irjtijmt met; add w*s Odafarted wife flnr