■» a*-.
V
ism®
im
i
Wfi
.t v>un.xnv»
' -EM-ENTin 0005,
JXD oas^xdsav^q
°.kk
‘■•■l, which ta destine* *
1.!..-.' I'T’Kli
‘V‘;ily, quickly .ebdwja,,.'
at; »l gas .u•!»«.
- mi r imninuM cr» It #4M
•a. Mnukc a* OiafunpW^
" ‘V l, “ 0 'onfumo,! iS»‘
av u.mgcr of flu,.* or '^s
t urthemururloosehaj^
..t, .vc am Invite! to c*lUl
tla-.-lasomcXoniple,^^
.TOK.V SHOEMAKER
Blair cWfy
:.J lor Caking aiuj £
[Ang. 12, i 860;
:s: vSjovjis.—-ijjg
: \'!^ rUln jp.
r.tal Cookm- StovoflßL
ratio:) ill all respect*. The
\ •■■at tin* flue 'arc warrant
■ .1 1 hake perfectly find unt
lll "f thi* btovoimut«a*
' o U '--f | vcrsttl Norite.
t l-i of good capacity—th»
• :';..i. I :i!» ail,! b,^
M.>> jciiJuj l>crecoimuend^j
r!-,r (-hives constantly On
JOSEPH U. BUBllf
'■ -'rican Iluutt, AOwna. •
\ I.VANIO OIL
; . iv.r. ii.Bu TAtiU,,.
! . at I'arb,isttojir^
i! the aim of acre Mid paln-
r' in any part of ths
in thv back,' breaston We
nr.)-, sprains. headache’
r,y oilier disease that i>
t I- only ever this cllssot
f ■ t VICTORY. Wh w 7
•:nn relieve the suflim
'l,lju>t My to thn pub.
1,1 bringing tothla
i others.. i , .
■ i« r cent, cat off to tht
uoire-ss'il, to T
■ f-HOAD/lVoprlotoh
Lewjgruvm, Pa.
• • Oii—Henry Lehl
ami all dealers i
NX) ITS PHiJMA.
Published, Gratia, jbe 2Bta
•A TIONAL TREATMENT,
i• - rtua or Bocal Weaknea.,
I Nervous Dlbiljty; taper
i -ago generally, by :
11. DE LAPTEV, M. D.
many alarming complain U, •
solitude of youth, iuav 1
'IRIUCIXE, is In this smtii ’
the entirely new and high
• ; :M by the Author, folly
i .' i y one is enabled to can
■ I ;o-t i-ossiblo cost, thereby ■
:)!is'of the <lav, •
I post free ina sealed on
i»" postage stamps te Dr.
New York City.
MANITY, READ
' •lyf this method of inform
-1 t is no medicine now of
ii • DU VALL’S GALVAN
ir.’.i-.anity.
V- on a friend of mine, who
n> a 111■ iualgi,:«ffection which
ua at in Centre county. We
t" i ho painful part, andgara
I)', s the. patient was asleep,
!:■ ai pain and continued eo.
.va a tiling to ulake good at
» cured in nearly the sane
J. 11. HAHN,
Centre HOI.
COUMTST.—THK
i.Mish a New Map of Wills
d Mirvcys. containing ill
-• the actual localities of
■ -r si*I [*, Schbol Houses,
: 'Ms, Stores, Finn Hoot;
) O'd Villages, a. Table of'
'v, giving tho name and
i f.giuved on the nmr
. a i table scale £0 .is to make
s. hi -fi will he coKred and
li' Kvcml to subscribers at
SAIMUKL OKI Is -
ISAAC G. FREED.
-—PKACTICAL
i-.uriOiiuccH
public
• rnjr
r“ constantly
I’-if.ij.Ducns,
V.UIM6U- 4Kr7
■ i :im a desire to render Ml*
■■■■! quality, ho hope* to
patronage.
J on reasonable tons*,
■ptly attended IoJ
■ y uopnuiided.' {l-t£
' K GAZETTE.—
funl Criminal* it to'
' i irenlated throughout
1- 'ireat Trial*, Criminal
• n tie. «omc, together with
. not to ho round in’asj
i ?l,for six month*,l*
theirnamt*
■ • Oi.’v reside rilatoljJ
> matskli,* co; :
■■> 1 1 o k I'iiicr liaxetta, ■
iff w I'vrlc CSjy.
Jack & Co>p
«<2 Altoona.
tNCIPAL'CITIES,'
Collcctlonffmada-*'.
* "ii demand, without la
i. it (iiir rate*. [l-tf
\y; iIOLLiPATB*
■ 1 V. PA.,
■ nfiiiair, Huntingdon
' ‘ promptly to all collM
hr present) at hi* flw
Greets, Uollldaytbuig-
1 1 ATM,
U NTV, PA.
of J. B.lllleman,
A'K, FOR MA'
’ ■« der for IVashinifp O?*
1 ; Castile Soap, Palm
I r.ad for sale at _
A. ROUSH’S-
T QUALITY OF
V/ii'ilesalo audßetailc*
j. mioemakeb.
Masonic Templ*»
\NI) HIGHL
.re, can he had at
HENRY LEHR’S-
IoGNKS, Po3£
tt hnaiv. Ac. for wj* 1 *
G/W. KKSSLt'R-^
kst .confer
’ C J ’ ni’.NKY LEHBg:
hii, AKPJtg
r Vir.BWP'
. .>i. , T .... ..... ... .....
. ..■........ ....... .■ , ... .. 1 .... .ye»<j ' I**" 4 * “v. W.'-
HeOHOM*
YOL. 3.
108 ALTOONA; tribune.
gtOKim t JOBS, PabU*«e Mid Proprietor
““"TSX”- >*
* M * '*l 00
100 1 60 3 00
t*» “•■■• « < 160 a 00 a «0
lhree week. ail lees than thr* BtoaUu, 26oeats per
<* “ eh u “ wtfoß * | DoQ thi. 6 montha. 1 yeejv
(U Uass or less, " *1» 4 00 * 7 00
’ 4 00 6 00 10 00
w« “ - (do 8 00 13,00
r«** 100 10 00 14 00
J“F 10 00 14 00 20 00
Half a oolnmOt ig oo 36 00 40 00
X?S« andltoeeetorrSotU**, 176
gsrcbanuadrertWeg iff *h» tllr6 * . „
BwiSSa qtrda, not exceeding 8
character pr individual in
trill be charged according to the above ratee.
iJssrlisein i-nts not marked with the number of insertions
will be continued till forbid and charged according
b Uj* above tonus.
Badness notices five cents per line for every insertion.
OWtosry noticesfisceeding ten linos, fifty cents a square.
tribune directory.
churches; ministers, &.C.,
Pnsbttcruin, Bev. A B. Class, Paetort— Preaching er
,rt Sabbath meriting at 10U o’clock, and in itio evening at
•u o’clock. Sabbath School at 0 o’clock, A.il.,iu.the Lec-
Room.. Prayer Meeting every Wedncaday. evening in
ife* Dot fOUWa
dktAoiiii tyitcopal, Ber.S. A. WtUtoX, Pastor.—Preach-
Sabbath morning at 11 o’clock and in tbooveu
jci Sabbath School in the Lecture Boom at'2 o’clock, P.
g Qineral Prayer Meeting in . same fomaevdryWodmjs
iij eteulug. Young Men’s Prayer Meeting, every Friday
ITcOi&X*
j tMfdicel Lullufan, Her. Jacob Sties, Pastor.—Preach
tag «v try Sabbath morning at and at 6Jd o'clock
in tlie evening. Sabbath School in the Lecture Boom at
1W o'clock, P. M. Prayer Mcotlug in abme room every
TWnwJay oreuing.
VmitA Brt&rtn, ilcr. D. SrscK, Pastor,—Preaching ov
kj Sabbath morning at 10J £ o’clock and in tire evening at
|U o'clock. Sabbath School in .the Locturu Bogm at 9
o'clock, A. M. Prayar Meeting every Wednesday evening
lnumoroom. .
PnUdaat Episcopal, R«v.R..W. Ouvm, Paator-—Divine
birice 2d and 4th Sundays of cadi month at lOld o’clock
1. M., and i',{ P. M. Sunday School at 9 o’clock- A. Mi
CUlwlic, Her. Jonx Twioos, Pastor.—Preaching at 10J4
o'clock in tin* morning,- and at 3J< in the afrernoon.
B. li. Fish, Paator—Preaching, every Sahkath
aoroiog at o'clock, aiid'alao in the evening. SaDith
Ntool at ’.‘o’clock, A. M. f Prayer Meeting every Weflues
ii; trsuluz.
African Mkaditt, Rev. Santa Oak, Paator.—Preaching
ernjr Sabbath mornlug at 11 o’clock and in the evening, in
tin old Colon School House.
ALTOONA MAIL SCHEDULE.
HAILS CLOU.
laden Way at
Waatara “
HolUdayaburg,
laatern Through Hall
MAILS AERIVH.
laetarn Through Mail, 8 SS A. M.
Featarp Way, 1130 A.M.
Intent , «go P.M.
HolUdayaburg 11 SO A. M. and 6 30 u
OBes open fbr the transaction of boslnest from 7 A.M.
P-WU daring the week, and front 3 to 9 o’dock, A. M.
«a iioday. - ■
Jnns VSMf] JOHN SHOEMAKER, P. |C.
RA.Lrftf&EOUL E .
■y* AWA.iI, l«LT« 7,10 A. M.
. “ Vert “ 8£( •» r U- |U u
** ! &■» “ wo*.*. :« usop:m.
■ ° Weat “ Iwß A. « IJ3O A M
1M “ JSui « ’ r«
“ Wait « « 700 PM.
_Tb» HOLLID.VV3BCEO BRANCH connects with .Express
wl * Eartand Vest.
Iht BIAIRSVILLiE BRANCH connects with Johnstown
mu but, Eu - ind WM > Atpreas Inin .Vest and M»3]
ijTtmbw 29, 1848.
THOS. A. BCOXr, Sup't.
MEETINGS OF ASSOCIATIONS'
Lofy'j -A- Y. M-, No. 281, meet* on second Tuee
thM ,IOTy thoAlasonic Xcm-
A. Y. M., No 10. meet, on the
f.v? h , “° ath > ,a the third Story of the Ma-
Tfinplt, »t M o clock, P. M.
°i of ar i N '°- «3, meets every Friday
"cl«:k*’p"j? ‘ Koad BtOI T « the Slasonic Temple, at 7J4
.T«Tnifn 0 - of O. F„No. 532, meets every Friday
Xo ‘ '*V-I* O.ja. 11., hold stated Conn*
« T «uh>g to the I. 0.0. F. Hall, In the
1n,,,. wY’i Council Fire kindled at 7th run 30th
jSJ£> ADAMS, C/iqfJt: fjune26, »«-t*
£i, t hTfV^M ,? j rfc<r ’ »<*** every Mon-
F.«. 1 th th ‘ r< * «ory of Tattoa’sJHaU, at '^o’clock
tonp, No. M, J. S, ef A., meets every
lnl . he2d *****°f Wton’sHaU. J
3U. <S. qf T, -meets oicry Satnr-
UCI ‘—
■L&rary and Beading Bonn Assoeia
rt iT, n -i r,' ate,ll / ° n the Ut Saturday evening, ip Janna
'lU lit in?}/ BUd oc teher. Board of Directors moot bn
•mu „v, T* y evei, tog to each month. Boom open from
“ o clock every evening, (Sunday except*!.) ■
COUNTY OF.FIQERS. ‘
Ssgasii^"
1
fi* n{ l -Attorney—Ben], L. Uewit.
“■* C ° aftr > J - »• McP^r
io Cosim&tfouers—Hugh A. CaldwsU. ,
Afiprafrcr-Joseph 0. Adluau
‘*«!yNh rreyori—James L. Gwlntu
"Wfurtr—John LlogaAlt.
I _g.MwfK*r, A;0. McCartney, Joa. ,». ZTawftt.
W» l ecto»-<l«« lßß Yr»w,Samuel ShUer,
Fox. ' v
Vrtnfendrnt,/ ......
ALTOONA BOROUGH OFFICERS
o#r. lV ;
cdkiftf un H -
Wrer 7T 3hmn Lowther.
j^^lrsarw'.
•hSTvi” MeOWJani
“ «_,*• ?**. “ Jacob Good. f
Wmhljb . j
Wsat A' Alex. Montgomery.
“ North « MJClaubnagh.
Valentine, Wm. Reod. .
lamount
lb.
STORE is in
l^^S™t¥e s>'ci t rons
urr * at * In rtore and for w i« b
-25,’saiy] ifl, Vnrt W. N. BHUGARD,
,J 181 JforU >M«treet, Philadelphia.
and zinc
e SO A.M.
8 00 A.M.
H 00 A.-U. ul < HO E. U.
S 00 “
"* ‘ V
~*S4 -
CARRIER’S ADDRESS
to nn .
PMtfMi ot tbe lltvona TrltaMrj
JANUARY, 1, 1859.
,A«*«Ht amM haswarmsd to Ufonad Mm •
UwtoMt, nnul bud;
oo.' UM«tr, «r iiwt yvhM
A welcome, fragrant flood.
Axonun Sonin, too, has cheered thehMH
iMldjgarden, orchard, field;
When beauty, pleasure, hope* of gain, ,
. OfKarth’s enjoyments yield. , . .
Axovxzx Futtuuitond tho golden grata,
’And eeared the flower and leaf;
Strewed Nature's hoanty rustling t/er (he plains
•'While winds alghod Nature’sgriet
AKOTHra Wwnm, with his funeral tread,
idigUyoß the w,
hike martial conqueror, to Inter the rlarl
The late, departed year.
And aa in snowy shroud he tomb* the Poet,
lie chant* its requlemwith hie howling blast.
And .now the Carrier—agent of the I*rasa, ,
Again presents you with his Hew Year’s Addrera;
And standing on the grave of ’5B,
Prays ’59 may bringju no worse late;
But in tho eternity of by-gone years, .
May with blooming honors biscompeers.
Kind Pat ro as of tho Tsuchs, then, we bid yon hall!
A happy Now Year! and could .wishes but avail
To banish past regrets, or were the power mine
To furnish, in their stead, bright hopes for *5O,
I’d have you entertain them; yea, and furthermore
To realize more Joy s than e’er you did before
In one short, flitting year; with goods of various kinds
Tour garners ahan be filled; with happiness your minds—
Bnt stay : another year:is past, mid what’s a year?
A ■ snow-flake on the water which doth disappear
Ire scarce you’ve marked it, or a meteor in the night
Which barns an instant, and then vanishes from sight.
But yet, shdrt‘ .fleeting as It is, it loaves behind
Plain traces off ite path, to teach the observaat.miad.
And what oPSa? Ah! ,Patrons,happy we
Who lit our ikyored land Cod’s stately, steppings ase.
The learned, veteran Doctor, and the yimng^lMbie
Pause in their contests, and polemieethey
Eif4 rations meanings and Bqptuo’s.riiota
Drop from, their memories and excite no mors disputes.
But, Luther’s folldwera,. and Mr. Wesley’s school,
They who obey their Elders—they whom Bishops rule.
They with coat-sleeves tight, and they with gowneleeves
wide, ■ -
. .with neck-cloths white, and black. in various manners tied,
Meet on a common platform, and with one accord,
Unite in prayer and praise, to Cod, their common Lord.
The sale* man leaves his ceonter, Artisans their shops.
And from Us business cares the tho’t-wurn merchant stops
Ihe lady le&ves bsr parlor, the professional man
Evades a client’s, patient's call as best ho.can;
The student leaves his hooka, the laborer his bed.
All daily to devote an hour in prayer to God.
The workman in hie work attire, the miUionatr%
Kneel by each other’s side and offer up their prayer. ,
TUI over the world, in lands of every name,'
The American Revivid spreads abroad its fame.
Ays! in the Holy Land, where once our Savior trod,
The traveller hean .the tidings of this work of Cod. ,'
And e’en withinthe enclosure of the Chinese wall'
lie bears of prayer-meetings held in Jaynes’ Mali.
Great Godl with mighty arm speed on thy work of grace
From cities to. the towns; from towns through every place
Till all this wide spread land froip Ocean’s shore to shore
Shall own thy .power and lore, and serve thee evermore
Then till tho globe itself shall roll up os a scroll,
Our country shall be prosperous, tmr Union whole.
Kansas bleeds no more! the rifle and the sword,
The cowardly asAein and the lawless horde
Of slavery agitates, who with base intent
Moved from Missouri homes and o’er the bound’ry went ’
To plot and execute their own unhallowed plans
Of carrying baliot-noxes with their marshaled clans,
Hsye ceassd from bloody riot and from civil strife,
And left the Inhabitant secure In land and life.
With peace within her borders, and with equal laws
To invito the emigrants who favors freedom’s cause,
Soon shall the growing hamlet, and the city great
Supply the population to become a State;
And many an enterprisinghoncst son of.toil
Shall rear a bappy home upon her fertile soil.
Mormon Utah, too, the home ofUrigliua Young*
That jpost traitorous villain ever.left unhung—
< Utah,the promised land for fool and vicious knave,
Wherewoman is degraded to a helpless slave,
Where vico and crfme and murder boldly stalk abroad, .
And gentiles oft are butchered in the name of God,
Rebellious, sin-cursed Utah! She at last jhas learned
■ That war with Dncle Bam, Ibr which her. prophets yearned
- That they, like Hoses, might, by stretching otrt their hand
O’crwheliu the Gentile army that would touch their land—
That war. is different now, from what it was of yore
When Joshua Anight and conquered and—as ne’er before
The Sun and Hoon stood still obedient to his word
Till Israel’s enemies shouldfall by Israel’s sword. ' *
. The spell fo broken and deep delusion tied,'
; And Mormons now are titled by one in Brigham's stead.
Whom Undo Sam haa sent invested with the might
To punish evil doers and protect .the right. •>
And now ere long, ws hope, .this filthy, noisome sore
Upon the body politic shall gall ho more,'
Bat Utah bo redeemed from vied of every name
And add a lostre.td the escutcheon of our lama.
But, ’McapboaSt, '
The Atlantic Telegraph excited men the most,
■ The news of its success like ancient Pharoah’s dnap
Became a world-wide filet, a nnlrersal theme.
' And Mr. Field, like Joseph, rose from low estate
■ T® b« a nation’* favorite—a world’s magnate. 1. ..
Grave Reverends, too, were found, in Bible learning skilled
To trace ont prophecies by this event fulfilled. L "
And striking seripture passages, fail many a score,
Acquired a meaning now, that ne’er was known before. ;
B’en poetry and eloquence new impnlse took, [book,
.And thoughts then penned and said would read well in a
But like the beauteous thing which hotsrsd in the air;. ’
When yet our steps were light, onr brows unstamped with'
care, •.
And from our soapy liquid, armed with pipe and bowl
Wo sent the gay globe bounding onward to Its. goal,'
And watched its rainbow tints enraptured with delight
Until the babble burst and vanished from onr sight; i
So with this “ Triumph,” too. “pf science and of art" i
It acted on a grander scale the bubble’s part.
Kind Patrons, what is fame? ’tis like the flowing tide
That safely waits the battier to tho harbor’s aide;
Yot had the struggling swimmer met the tbbing wave
The end to greater skill had been a watery grave.
How near this Field had come, to live on History's page,
A prodigy of scicnco—greatest of his agal
But failing of success, his acts, though still the same,
Nor bring him honor now, nor win him lasting fame.
Bat Just'as Casar, dead, was used to stop a hols,
Who, living, held an empire under his control; ••
So Cyrus Field, whose name was once on every tongne
Forgot, shall spend his days, and die at last unsung.
Congress again has met, although ’Us very true.
It matters little whsn they meet, for all they do.
But yet there Is a care to all onr country’s friends.
That lasts from when their session opes, until Itends;
Like the anxiety which every mother knows
Whose wicked-eon sometimes his evil temper shows.
She keeps a constant watch, with fervent hopes that lfits
May nothing unbecoming in his actions see.
*
• , r r* *wr *s flri-- v-' V-w.aT'.vi
-
Tfcot Cowgnm owr good tea may •WfcMKwfikgtat
At* Nit txxxm thii tij timt of Um OiSi(lM»>i
•Venom mlj fit to miofii te Dm (teg V
WJtk HwMQ Md Tom Hyer—or mmm neh ofiter (tag—
Th*t molly w* me lwckylfw*4om*ta»
Wttl ** **• fn " —*■ fiiyiHliinl jwi
Aod-yot them bnOalamhamnimiU prmwm tooteim
!H» title “ HomnbleP o pnfi* to iltote mmm i
Oh I; Mum- where te thy bleth I are thmp *«emrateAoye
That tobratethemeo who mtegb teaoch boy.'
tet the Prem'ipmfc * *~ier«n rtmtu
And piece them fighter* in the grad* where th^tacM.
Art tMMi I ctoa; I vidt lot to didtw
Your generous potieoce > with Abe length of my.edtemn.
®*»* T»tafew words pertonalljr—hear me through—
My duty nrgeame to (peak to each of you.
' The Printer* 1 teak ia hard, they labor day and night.
And at yoOr eaae you read »bat toiling they indite.
Do any of yon owe them Lthan begin the year
By promptly paying all yon are indebted here.
Your bill ia eatalL yon «ay—yrfay then ao much the wane,
Bach Patron my* the *ante,yau may be sure of conree;
And that'* the eery reaeoh why McCrum * Darn
Bind ao much .trouble; In collecting what they earn.
“Your biU U aaaaU,” why then, theawder It |e paid
And by the aggregate a good, round men i* made.
Than pay yonr Printer* SOU, and when yon ehuOe ot
Tliia mortal coll of you™, and all things earthly dofl;
So shall you bare this world without a conscience rased.
And one debt Ims you’ll hare to answer in tbs next.
But finally, my friends, j wish yon all mnohjoy,
And hope you’re each a qharter fur the
■~v CARRIER BOT.
EUenMaclure, for some years, had held
the situation of upper nurse at one of the
private lunatic asylums in the suburbs of
the metropolis. She ‘ was tall, graceful,
and • wherewithal good -to look upon : a
number of suitors; had at diferent times
made overture of :matrimony to her, but
were rejected; and it f was not till after
long intimacy that, George Farrace, a por
ter in the establishment, ventured to sue
for her baud, and was accepted.
For spine tiinej George had noticed,
that when Ellen returned after her walks,
either of pleasure ;or business, that her
countenance wore an expression of anxi
ety, and at length resolved to question
her upon the subject.
*My dear Ellen/ • said he, addressing
her one day, as she entered from the road,
‘ what can be the cause of that anxiety
which I see depicted on your features
every time you return to the house after
a walk ?’
‘Oh, nothing,' replied Ellen shortly;
‘ what’s the use of making a bother about
nothing V ',
‘ Bat lam sure it’s.more than nothing/
replied George, ‘ or it would not make you
so unhappy.' i
‘ Well, if I have a secret annoyance, it
would be ho use of telling you/ returnee
Ellen; you men only make more distur
bance than is necessary.’
‘But it may be in my power to remove
your trouble for aught you know.'
‘ Well, never mind, J dare say it wil
soon end/ answered Ellen.
‘But I think it a great want of confi
dence on your part/ returned George,
* not to fell me : for what brings you pain
must necessarily make me unhappy.'
‘ I am sure, my d,e?r George, it is far
from my thoughts;to cause you the slight
est inquietude, but really the circumstance
is so trivial a nature that it is scarcely
worth mentioning, yet, at the same time,
brings grief to m'e. Many girls would
laugh, and think it capital sport.'
‘ tell me/ said George, earnestly.
‘ Come —come/ ll
‘ Oh, don't tease; ine/
‘ But I will, until 1 know what ails you.'
* Then you will fait some time.’
* I dont care/ said George, ‘I am re
solved to know.’
Alter a good deal of persuading, alter
nately mixed up - with vows and sighs,
Ellen informed him that for some time
past an individual had Jbeen in the habit
of annoying her with dishonorable pro
posals. whenever he mot her in the streets,
and that lately he jljad carried his imper
tinence so far, that she could, not step
outside the door without being subject to
insult, as he was always on the watch for
her.' ' ; v‘''*T, ' i ■//'
. IP%» that’s it/ said George, when she
had finished.
s ‘ I really dread to; go outside'the door/
continued Ellen. , ;■ ; :/'■■ " , v V'
‘ Only let me hh him/ said George,
‘and I’ll teUMmmymihd upon jma
t/er//T/:/'v" -/-H
‘ There/ cried- Ellen, ‘ I thought you
would go and makp some dreadful distur
bance/
‘ Well/ said Geo *ge, calmly.
‘ Who knows but that he may stab you,
or do something worse?'
‘ Booh I nonsense 1’ returned her lover.
‘ You know/ continued Ellen, ‘there
are a set of horrid fellows about that don’t
mind what they do, and are ready to per
petrate any villainy, even murder itself.’
‘Stuff! Burke and Hare are not come
back to life. Somebody has been fright
ening you/
‘ Well, George, did you not read the
horrid murder that was committed last
week at——l forget, where, where a jeal
ous lover poisoned his fortunate rival, and
after murdering fifteen of his relations,
put a period his own unhappy exist-
ALTOONA, PA., THURSDAY, JANUARY. 13, 1859.
Udect.
A CURE FOR I*OFE.
U, J,
'V - ?
[INDEPENDENT IN EV^ETTJHINa.j
Good evening/ said he. ‘By all that’s
lovely, I have been waiting here these
three hours in the anxious expectation of
seeing your beauteous self.’
‘-Yog need not have waited so long; I
am sure you give yourself a vast deal too
much trouble. Besides, I have no time
to spare; I am in a harry/ replied Ellen.
■ Celestial being I’ cried the major, at
tempting to take her, hand, ‘ the trouble
in seeking your enchanting society is the
greatest happiness of my existence.’
‘ I beg you will desist, sir/ said Ellen,
withdrawing her hand; ‘ those freedoms I
dislike yjßfy much.’ *
‘ I awgar never to cease to follow you
until you promise, to give me the pleasure
of your company.’ ’
promise you any such thing/
said Ellen. ' '
‘ But T will!’ cried the major. r •
* Now I must beg you to leave me/ said
Ellen, as she reached the house where she
was going. ■ ■
‘ Bo you return to-nigbt? 4
, * J d° nofc think I shall/ replied EHen,
hoping he would leave her to return alone,
and willing, if possible, to avoid the praci
tical joke that George had determined id
play him. V ? v
‘ I stall wait/ slid the major, as Ellen
eft him.
Ellen delayed her visit M long as postn
)le, and upon again coming into the
street, saw the major hgr
‘Now, sir/ said she, ‘I intend return
ing home; and wish to know once for all,
if yog arc determined to continue to
MCftltW . 7/
ence by. manning % heiress am
dying in tier arms/ , .
‘ Surely, Ellen you don’t give credent
to g&eb trash!’ said George; ‘if you do,
1 am sure will become i candidate
for one of our straight waiseoata/
‘ Well, all that I know is, it is in print;
and you can see it yourself/ - '
* That may be; but what baa all this to
do with, preventing the individual you
mention from annoying you V
' ‘lf JOtt must speak to him, for Heaven’s
sake do |t mildly. Who knows what may
happen if you are rash V cried Ellen, fear
ful of a rupture between the two men.
f Oh, yes/ replied George, / I’ll use him
tenderly enough. I have just thought of
a plan/
‘ What is it.?*
‘ Why, it requires your concurrence to
carry it into execution, and afterwards I’ll
lay any money that he does not trouble you
again/
‘ Let me hear it/ said Ellen.
‘Well, then, the next time he annoys
you, pretend to listen to his proposals,
and bring him in here/
4 But as you will open the gate/ contin
ued Ellen, ‘ he will see you/
‘ Never mind that/ said George. ‘ You
must let him suppose that I believe him to
be a patient; there is one coming to-night
or to-morrow morning, and we can easily
mistake your tormentor for him, and take
ample revenge for his behavior/
‘ What would you do to him?’
‘ Hand him over to qne of the keepers
by mistake.; get him shaved and put into
a waistcoat if he’s troublesome/
‘ But what will be the consequence ?’
cried Ellen.
You must say to me when yon bring
him in, ‘ This is the.gentlemen Mr. Lucas
spoke about/ He will not then suspect
that ! know anything about the matter,
and when the trick is over, he will not
take revenge *upon a woman/
‘ But he will complain to Dr. Hillman,
the proprietor of this establishment, and
we shall lose our situations/ said Ellen in
reply.
‘Never mind that/ said George; ‘I
will run the risk of that. We must apolo
gise for the mistake in v the best way we
are able. Nobody will suspect it other
wise: As for your tormentor, he will be
too much ashamed to show his bald pate
and acknowledge that he has been duped
)y a woman, while you will have ample
satisfaction/
‘That will do/ said Ellen; ‘but I am
lalf afraid/
‘ Courage— courage/ replied her lover.
‘I am going to town this evening, and
I have no doubt I shall see the fellow
wating at the comer of the street ’
‘ All right,’ said George, rubbing his
lauds with deljght at the thoughts dserv
ipg out his sweetheart’s plauge.
? ‘ I’ll see you before I go/ said .fcllen,
and retired to perform her daily duty in
tending upon the numerous patients con
ined within the-house.
When the occupation of the day was
done, some business required the atten
dance of Ellen in town, and having
prepared herself for walking, she set out.
Scabely had she proceeded beyond the
precincts of the hogse before her tormen
tor, who was a major in the army, dressed
in a military braided frock coat, made un
to her. ’ , F
‘Are you engaged to another V asked
the major.
‘Yes/ t , i
‘ I will, not believe it/ said ho impas
medly. *
‘l oannpt help that/ said Ellen
‘ And I will see, you home/ ’ ’
‘ Youoannot/
♦ *•
‘ Lovely girl i
‘ I do not want your company/ aaid £l.
len.
‘ I will not live without you/ rotors ed
the major.
‘Aw you determined to follow me
isomer
*1 am, my angel Cannot yon admit
me intothe asylum, where I can hive (he
r pleasure hfyour sweet company to myself?*
‘ What do you think the. people would
say of me ?’ asked Ellen.
* I neither know nor care/ replied the
major/ ‘ so that I possess yourself.’
( Really, I think you are a fit candidate
for the asylum,’ responded Ellen, as she
drew near home; ‘ will you leave me f*
‘No; you must admit me. I know you
could if you liked.’ *■ Tf , ;
, ‘ Well, then, if you will promise—— *
‘ What ? I will promise anything for
your sake.’ v
‘That you will do just as I tell you,, to
avoid suspicion.’ .
‘ I will.’ '
‘Well, then/ replied Ellen, *ybtt are
not totally indifferent to me, and I will
grant you my company for the remainder
of the evening.’
‘ Sweet girl!’ cried the enraptured ma
jor, ‘ I know the god of love at hut would
move your heart to compassion.’ ,
‘ But there will be soipe difficulty in
getting you past the gate,’ said Ellen.
‘Why?’
‘ Becapse of the porter George I’*
‘ Can’t you frame some plan to get him
from his post for a minute ?’
‘ Let me think,’ said Ellen, appearing
to be wrapt in thought; ‘ let iue see—yea,
now I have it—there is a gentleman com
ing to the asylum to-night or to-morrow,
and you must represent him.'
‘ I would represent the devil himself, if
it were .necessary, for an hour’s pleasure
in your company/ said the majors
‘ And when the porter opens the gate,
you must throw yourself about as if insane.
I will say ‘ this is the gentleman Mr. Lu--
cas spoke about/ so he will Ipt us pass
without suspicion.’
‘ That’s well planned, my charmed/ said
the major, ‘ a woman is never at allots for
a scheme; but who is Mr. Lucas ?f \ \
‘Only one of fhe medical attendants.’
‘Very well.’
By this time they reached the asylum,
and Ellen knocked at the gate. :-T
‘ Who have you with you V asked Geo.,
apparently unconscious of the affair* a* he
opened tbs' gate.
‘ The gentleman Mr. Lueas spoke about,'
replied Ellen; ‘his malady is snoii : that
he is outrageous with everybody hilt a fe
male.-’
th * n(^ee^,, re plkd George, shutting
* You are a fine fellow—don’t yoilthink
you are ?’ .said the major to George* as he
entered, and at the same time aping the
aotica of a maniac.
‘ Very! responded George, feigning to
mmor him.
‘ I’m King Nebuchadnezzar/ said the
major.
‘ Indeed!’
‘ And was at the battle of Seringapktam/
‘Very happy to hear it.’ 1 fr;
‘Killed eleven thousand and a half
with my own hand, and will fight you for
aha p orth of marbles. Can you knuckle
down well? Now, my man, come on/
continued, the major, pretending tq throw
off his coat as if about to fight. , | *
‘ Come, come/ whispered Ellen / follow
me!’ :'
‘ On the wings of loye I’ returned the
ma j° r . gallantly, wishing George* td think
that his quiet compliance to a female
voice was a feature of his malady* /None
but the brave I—none hut the brave I—
none but the brave deserve the fairr 1
‘Now, come along, and don’t make so
mnoh noise, Bing Nebuchadnezzar/ said
Ellen, aloud. 7 1 J |
* You don’t think I want to wasie my
time talking to that poltroon, do yog; my
miracle of beauty V whispered the major
in her ear as. he followed he?. ■ '7 ‘
‘ This way, if you please/ said Ellen,
added, pushing him into a dark room;
‘Are you going away V demanded the
major. ■ ' : ; .
* For a minute/ I
J. ,For . Heaven’s sake be ogick/ returned
the major; or I will die of love before you
return/ ! * ‘
I ‘ Hush—d»ush I for mercy’s sake or
some one will Bear you/ replied. Ellen, as
she shut the door and fastened it outside,
she went io oonsult with George, as
to the next step they were to take. ~
’ * WBat shall wo do with Mm now V
:neked' she; ‘ [t
‘Gall the sharer, to be sore/ said
George. .
j ‘Hehas a fine bead of ba|r. ’Twill be
a pityto out it off/ replied Ellen,
j fOh, never mind that. There’s many
a fine head of hair been out off here/ re
plied her lover. ‘lt will soon grow
again/ \
j ‘ Very well/ said Ellen; and she imme
diatdywent to inform the shaver of the
establishment that there was a patient just
come, who imagined hmself Nebnohad
to ttf hfc
t„- • j-*• V--fr-.
EDITORS AND PROPRIETORS
* Very well,’ replied the person ad*
dressed ; and calling one of the keepers,
they went with Ellen, who carried a fight
to the room where the major waa aittaie
in the dark. •
‘ Good evening, Ncbuchadnessar/ mid
the shaver, as he entered.
• ‘ Good evening/ said the major, willing
to keep up the character he had assumed*
I am always glad to see my subjects in
good health/
‘l've come to shave your majesty's
hsad/ returned the shaver, as pleasantly
as he could. , #
V demanded the major,
stretching his eya to their utmost limit,
and at the same time forgetting his aa«
earned oharaoter.
‘ Shave jour majesty’s head/ said the
man.
* I’ll- be d-—-d if you do, then I’ respond*'
«d the captain, making for the door, mid
looking rather alarmed.
* It will be a -practical lesson in humlli>
ty for your subjects,' said the keeper, who
was standing by. •
* A practical lesson in d nl' roared
the major: ‘and I will knock the finl
down that lays a finger on me.’
. ‘Oh, very well, your majesty,’ replied
the keeper. ‘II you will not take the laal
lesson quietly, we must adopt oar
plan, and make you.’
‘Let me out!' roared the captain.
‘ You were not brought Imre for that,*
‘ Let me out, I say j or, I will call for
assistance,’ said the major.
‘lt’s no uaecallitig here—no onellstsat
to a madman’s voice.’
‘ But I tell you I am not mad.*
*Halha 1' replied the keeper. * Hue
all say ao that came here, and believe
themselves the most sensible people pa
earth.’ .• -
r But I tell you I am in mj sound mo*
ses.'
‘ What werg you brought here' fort* '
As the major could Dot well answer thli
question, he lookedrather stupid. . f
? / It is no. use standing talking to bin/
said George, who now entered. * Whj ;
don’t you-shave him at once, according to
orders f He’s «s mad as a Marth haw,,
and wanted to. fight me at the gate just
now for a. ha’p’orth p’ marbles.’: .?
*Ha ! ha-1 ha!’ laughed all thrM,; (rif'
the same time approaching the major,
who, being desperate, and seeing him—lf
in a predicament that he opuld
' wstroohr 1
account for, began to show fight inreal
earnest, as he was attempted td be
by three powerful inen
‘ Hold him by the legs/ laid the keeper,
‘ That’s it/ replied the shaver. i
‘Get the weiscoatl’ called George.
‘ while I hold his aims.' ■ /,./£_ .‘'
‘Cursed villains 1’ roared thsmajor,>
wit fc oatb/while heplunged
and f kicked violently} ‘doyou want to
murder me ? I'll make you' pay for it/
* Hold )*l® tigfct/ said the keeper.
■ Gejfnini into the chair and strap him
down/ said George.
‘ Put that arm into the waueoat/ oried
the keeper. '
4 That's it/ said ope.
* All ”sht!' said * second. .
‘ And now you may kick as long as jot
like/ remarked the third, as they got the ■
major on the, floor, his legs strapped to* i
gether, and h|ig arms made fast and con* I
fined behind him by . the strait-waistcoat.
* ifpw let's have him in the chair/ said
the shaver; and immediately the unfortu
nate major was placed in the chair, and
strapped^ while the shaver prepared
to clip his luxuriant curls.
After , or three attempts, he found
impossible, for the major kept
swearing and rolling about his head, as if
he‘ would shake it off his shoulders.
• * Here, just hold his head/ said tho
shaver to his companions,' and immediate
ly , they leid hold of their victim's ears,
one bn .each side, while the shaver olip
ped off his glossy curia in a twinkling.
■ * I’lt bring an action against yon all,* groaned'
me major, in the anguish of his spirit
‘Ob, don’t brother,’ answered the sharer, as
he lathered his head, and passing-ins razor orer
Jv the noble major became as bald as a barber’s
block, grinning most horribly daring the inter
esting process.
* He 'Won’t want these mustachios here,* ooa».
tinned the shaver, ‘ they had better come off; t|
will make him look three times more respeotw>
hie—there!’ ho said, as ho cut off his whiskers
and shaved his upporlip— ‘ Nebuchadnezzar was
not half so respectable a looking chap as you.’
1 Oh! oh I oh!’ groaned the major, in the deep
sgony of his spirit, while his head hung upon
his breast in the most abject despondency.
When the operation was finished, he was oat«
ried to a ward in another part of the building,
and as be showed some resistance, was strapped
down to an iron bedstead* where, after many -
fruitless endeavours to release himself from-hit'
unpleasant situation, and wearied out with ex
ertion and mortification, he fell asleep.
On the following morning the principal of thO
establishment walked into tho ward where the
major lay with his head close shaven, and to :
whom the latter bitterly complained of the tmt>
ment he had received.
- * Hash! hush 1’ replied the doftar; * don’t
tress yourself—you will be better by and by.*
‘But I tell you. sir, there is some mistake.-*
I am not the individual you take me to be.*
• I know it, my good man,’ replied the dee*
tor, soothingly, willing to humor what be otlfo
sidered some particular whim of the map!a^*|«
* I tell you, sir, that I am Major ——, af
Mrieaty’aeepdoe.’
lfiftty,’ rolled th« t,
&-
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NO. 48.
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