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n. A. BUMILLER, Editor.
VOL. 58.
THE SPELL.
Oh. the spoil, the wonderful spell!
That's exciting ho young mid the old as well;
Gather! UK the people from tar and from near.
To Join in the class—Now Isn't it queer*
spelling and guessing at word* that aiv tough,
Innocent spelter, it seems hard enough
That for dropping an "I" an "K" or an "A,"
Tliev are sent to the rear in utter diunay.
Whilst the rest of the class and audience as
Will lay back and laugh at the fun of the spell.
Oh, the spell the laughing spell!
To attend it the people are rushing pell mell;
And when they get luere they are struck with
surprise,
When iliev Had there are "hs" where they
thought there were Ts,"
And when they stick in the "IV where there
ought to be "K's" ....
They set down in disgust and say confound the
bees,
I mind one old ladv used a "K" for a 4 ;0,"
And said, "when I was a gal that's how they
tenehed mo,"
And as she stepped down and out there went
up a yell,
And she said, "consarn the critter who inven
ted the spell."
Oh. the spell, that extraordinary spell!
What fun It creates no language can tell;
There is young Sprlgglns, he looked so torlorn
When his gal cantered off at the toot of the
horn. ~ „
Trembling blushing, for the rear she did strike,
Cause she and Mr.VVehstei did not spell it alike
Again the shrill notes ot the trumpet are heard:
This time an old Patriarch's been mangling a
word,
And the youngsters all set up a shout and a
yell
And tne aged man wishes the spells were In —-
Oh, the spell.the fun-making spell!
Go there if you're sick and you'll lie apt to get
well.
Why there is Jim Leathers, he looks like a
spook,
His g!.l has been wrestling with the j toughest
word In the book.
She did pretty well, but Jerusalem, just hear
That Infernal old horn, she's now back at the
rear
Whilst an urchin near by on cussedness bent
Shrieks out. -Miss Muggins, yer can't spell
worth a cent,"
Then with vengeance that female upon that
same urchin fell,
And it seemed a young corpse must emerge
from that speil.
Oh. the spell, the sensational snell!
There never was anything took half so well.
There's a chap who imagines he's old Webster
himself.
And all other spellers he can lay on the shelf.
He's mistaken and tramps off at the sound of
the horn.
Looking like a fellow who is only half bom.
He was a sad looking mortal as away he did
point
For the rear, disgusted.and his jaw out of joint;
Aud from the noise and confusion it's easy to
tell
That the people are tickled to death with the
spell.
HULDAH.
A TRUE STORY OF 1812.
"Without faith it is impossible to
please God." Tenderly, reverently
even, the gray-haired man repeated the
words.
Huldah's head gave an impatient I
toss. Many a time had she discussed
theological questions with her father,
and her qnick mind bad often proved a
match for his more mature judgment ;
but when he took refuge in Scripture,
as he was now doing, she could go no
further.
The last blue plate was placed beside
its campanion on the dresser with an
energy that threatened its destruction.
"Patieuce," "waiting" and "faith"
were words she could not understand.
She herself was overflowing with life.
"Faith without t corks is dead, any
way." She spoke more to herself than
to her father, but some one behind
caught the words and merrily called
out, "Who did you say was dead any
way ? Have you been murdering ?"
Huldah knew the voice and turned
with a smile. The good-natured,hand'
some fellow who entered read his wel
come in her face.
"What's the news, Si ?" she ask
ed.
"News enough, I should think.
Those rascally Britishers are up to all
sorts of dodges. Their yessels are all
along the coast, and nobody's safe.
We thought they only wanted to get
our seamen, but they are robbing vill
ages and burning vessels, and I don't
know wiiat. I'd like a chance to give
it to 'em once ! Guess they'd find that
a 'Yauket' is good for soinethiug 1"
Standing in the doorway, his tall
form seeming still taller against the
back-ground of a sea and sky, Josiah
Bates really looked as if he might keep
an army at bay. And Huldah was
pleased to hear his threats, for, to tell
the truth, a faint suspicion of his cow
ardice had crossed her mind when Si
had pleaded sickness and lemained at
home when his vessel sailed.
"We roust trust in God. He's our
only hope." The gray-haired father
spoke, and again came the impatient
toss of the girl's head.
"Guess 'twill take something besides
faith to deal with Englishmen. Who
was it ? Cromwell, I believe, used to
tell his soldiers to 'trust in God and
keep their powder dry ,' and I think the
last part of the advice the most import
ant."
The old man made no reply. lie
was back in Revolutionary days, deal
ing with Englishmen himself. Many
a time had long lines of soldiers follow
ed the "rud a-dub-dub" of that dusty
drum hanging on the wall.
Iluldah had no such memories.
More important to her was the fact
that the eggs must be gathered before
dark. She lingered a minute on the
back porch, half-hoping, half-feanng
that Josiah might follow, for she had
seen from the first that his visit was
not an aimless one. The minute grew
to half an hour, for Josiah did follow,
and thus Haldah listened to the old,
yet ever-new story. Very sweet, it
sounded in her ears. Fancy clothed
the man before her with eYery virtue,
MILLHEIM, PA., THURSDAY, MAY 8., 1884.
and woman like, sho was ready to fall
down and worship the creature of her
imagination.
"Oh, Si ! Hullie ! Come with me
to the beach ! There's a vessel in sight
that looks like a man-o'-war. It's
growing dark and I can't quite make
out, but I think she's coining to an an
chor."
And Josinh's question was left un
answered while the two hastened with
Cousin Hannah to the shore.
It certainly was a man-of-war, aiul
a British one at that. Happened to
be anchored, and piobably meant mis
chief.
"What can we do ?"Ilannah turned
a white, scared face toward her cousin.
"They'll carry off our cettle and rob
our orchards, aud maybe burn houses !
Our men are 'most all away, you
know."
Huldah was not frightened. She
felt that two could put ten thousand to
flight, provided the two were she and
Josiab, Slill plain common sense
taught her that something must be
done.
"We must send to Boston for help.
There are soldiers there."
"Boston ? Why, Bis ton is more
than twenty miles away !"
"But it's the nearest place where we
can get help. They," nodding her
head towards the war-ship, "won't
land o:i this strange coast till daylight,
and by that time men can travel from
Boston. Yes, Josiab, you must go as
soon as you can."
Evidently Josiab did not exactly a
gree with the girl. Ho looked down,
kicked the moss at his feet, coughed,
aud finally stammered something about
danger.
The clear blue eyes looked at him
searcbingly.
"Surely you are not a/raid, Si ?"
No, he wasn't "afraid," but he
didn't like to "leave her unprotected."
"Nonsense ! There's no time to
lose. You might go in a boat ; but I
think on horseback would be the best.
Be off," half-laughing, "be off! or I'll
go myself."
And he was forced to leave them.
The two girls lingered awhile, watch
ing the distant vessel fade into dark
ness, and the coming out of the wake
ful stars. They did not feel alarmed.
Help was sure to arrive before morning.
But, when she went home, Iluldah se
curely fastened the door of every out
building. "If such a thing should
happen as their coming ashore they'll
have some work in opening doors ;>
round our premises," she said.
There was but little sleep in the vil
lage that night. When the small hours
came and the cocks bejjat. to crow many
eyes were 9trained to watch the road
from Boston, for by this time all the
people had heard of the threatened dan
ger and expected aid.
Four o'olock came, then five, and
the east was growing light. Still no
soldiers, no mesenger.
It was certainly time for them.
Could Josiah have been bar mod ? Had
he not reached the city ? iluldah'
breath came fast at the thought. What
if she had been the means of sending
him into danger V
But there was a movement now on
board the vessel. Ail old tar, watch
ing through his spy-gl iss, stid they
were lowering boats.
"Heaven help us !" exclaimed one.
There was scarcely an able-bodied man
in the village. Some were in the army,
some at sea. What could a few oUI
men and defenseless women and chil
dren do to protect themselves ?
"Let us p:ay," said Huldah's gray
haired father, and to the church they
all went.
"Not all.While those assembled
knelt to pray, Iluldah and Hannah,
each bearing a dru n, hurried to the
shore and hid behind the rocks. One
long look they cast up the road; but no
body was in sight.
Then they watched the boats as each
measured stroke of the oars biotight
them nearer and nearer, and the white
cuffs of the officers could be seen a
gainst the dark blue of their jackets.
And now the words of com nand could
be distinctly heard. The time for iut
tion had coma.
Suddenly, loud and long, sounded
the call of the drums !
The boat* stopped. There was a hur
ried consultation, the drums still beat
ing as fircely as two girls could make
them. The British feared to land.
This little village by the sea must be
garrisoned. The boats were turned a
bout. They were soon received on
board the war-ship, and she, like a
huge vulture cheate I of its prey, rais
ed her broad wings and slowly sailed
away.
Then,bow the people from the church
came flocking around Huldah and Han
nah ! llow they praised them as the
deliverers of the place 1 Gratitude was
written on every face.
Iluldah was glad when she could re
turn to the of her home once
more. Above all the praises she had
received she prized her father's caress-
A PAPER FOR THE HOME CIRCLE
es us he whispered :
"It was your works that saved us
after nil, my child,"
Then her tears came. "Father, do
you know that all the time I was lie
hind the rocks I thought of you, pray
ing,and I believe it was because of your
faith God turned the minds of the Brit
ish sailors."
The liens were cackling and cows
lowing, impatient for their breakfast.
What did they know or care about
their narrow escape ?
Iluldah unbarred and unlocked thy
door of the corn-house. The great pile
of yellow ears in the corner had been
disturbed. She pushed a part of it a
side. Something moved. There was
an upheaval and then emerged the head
shoulders and body of a man.
It wits Josiab Bates !
Iluldah gave a little start of fright,
a laugh that sounded like a sob, then
turned and rail from the place.
Straight to her own room she went,
and burried her face in the pillow. Her
idol had fallen ! The man she almost
loyed was a coward ! Bitter tears she
shed over her departed ideal. This man
could never again take its place.
Aud yet she had reason to be glad
that, the discovery had not come too
late.
* An hour afterward she was moving
about her household work, with the
same cheerful smile that she always
wore, and no one ever knew through
her why the troops from Boston failed
to come.
We need not add that josiah Bates
never dared to repeat the quest ion
which had been left unanswered on the
evening when the man-of-war anchored
in the harbor.
STORIES OF THE ELEPHANT
They Exhibit a Strong 1 Fondneso
for Drunken Men.
Jack Eaves was the keeper for a
while of the elephant Tippoo Saib, one
of the largest and fiercest elephants ever
known in this country. Tippoo Saib,
had the longest tusks of any elephant.
They were over ten feet long, and he
would manage 'em in away that was
terrible to other people, though very
convenient to himself,openin' 'em very
wide or bringin' 'era b th together to
o point, just as he chose.
They finally had to saw these tusks
off, aud Jack E ives put the shortened
tusks to a use which I don't think
could ever poss'bly enter anybody's
head, except his own. He put his
money in 'em—made a savin's bank of
one of the cavities in the hollow of the
tusk.
lie had previously kept his loose
money around his clothes or hidden in
the circus tent, but he had been rob
bed, and he made up his mind to find a
safe place, and in Tippoo Salb's trunk
his money was safe.
Elephants, as is well known, are
very fond of whisky, and a female ele
phant, known as little Betsy, used to
go ou a drunk regularly every Sunday
along with a chap called "Long John,"
her keeper. Whenever "Long John"
would want a whisky he would ask for
it in the name of "Little Betsy." lie
had a great s.dicitude about Betsy's
ears, that were very sensitive to cold,
and one time, when they weie showiu'
out West quite late in the autumn, he
said to the manager of the show :
"You'd belter get some whisky for
Betsy, or she'll freeze ; her ears are be
ginnin' to freeze already."
"How much shall I get ?" asked the
manager.
"Oh," said Long John, "a couple of
buckets."
The manager opened his eye 3 at this
wholesale order.
The two buckets were got, and over
a bucket and a half was given to Little
Betsy, and Long John partook yery
liberally of the balance. In an hour or
two Little Betsy and Long John were
drunk together. The elephant would
roll oyer, and kick up her huge heels,
and then gettin' up again would seize
Long John playfully in her trunk, and
toss him over her back, and pick him
up agiin, and the two would have a
regular drunken spree.
And every now and then Littleßetpy
would give a sort of grunt, a noise that
sounded just like laughin', and that
Long John swore was intended for a
laugh.
It is one of the most curious things
in the world, that elephants aie so very
forbearing to and considerate of drunk
en men. This "Long John" when he
was drunk used to go round the two
elephants of the show, whom nobody
else dared to bother, and of whom he
himself was afraid when sober -Cana
da and Sultan—and would fool with
'em, and swing on their tusk, and loss
their trunks about, and then would
fall at their feet asleep.
And they wouldn't hurt him 'em
selves—would be as careful of him as
if he was a baby elephant—and wouldn't
eyen allow any of the boys to play any
tricks upou Lira.
A TUB STORY.
New tubs, is it ? Well, Mr. Car
penter, no doubt they'll bo a dale natcr
than the ould ones, but they'll never be
the game to mo.
/in l attached to the ould tubs ?
Why, Bure, if you'll believe it, I've
the best of reasons for beln' attached
to them, for they saved my loifo, iu
dade they did, as I'm a living sinner.
Master and Missus, as you must
know, are well-off people, with lashings
of silver and the loike of that, and at
the time I'm spakingof they kept them
same in the house.
They had no more fear of being rob
bed than I have at this minute, and
they just turned a bit of a pantry key
They had no more fear of being rob
bed than I have at this minute, and
they just turned a bit of a pantry key
on them at night, and thought of no
danger it all.
And no more did I, until the day
came whin there was a grand party at
my missus' daughter's, and she and he
went off to it together.
"We mightn't be home to-night, Bi
ddy," says she ; "but you'd not feel a
fraid of staying in the house along with
Nora ?"
"And why should I, ma'am V" says
I. Lord help us, how little we know
of what's comin' ! "Why should I,
ma'am ?" says I. "There's no ghosts
in it, I'm sartin."
And off they went together, him and
her, and Master Alfred ; and about
nine o'clock Nora and me fastened the
doors, and went to bed.
Now, I've a corn that hurt 3 me won
derfully because it's on the joiut of my
big toe, aud nothing aises it but soak
ing it in sodawater.
So, after I'd been in bed an liour or
moie, that corn began to burn and
smart to that degray I R'os wild, and I
thought to myself I'd go down into
the kitchen, and soak my feet well, and
pray the saints to better it.
So, not to w:.ke Nora, I slipped out
as soft as silk, and down the stairs,aud
never lighting a light, for it was as
bright as day With the rnoon.
I just let the water in the tub 3, and
stepping on a chair, sat on the wan of
'em wid me feet in the other, and let
the warm water run, and I was get
ting a dale of comfort, when, all in a
sudden, I heard a noise that made the
blood iu me veins run cowld.
It was steps aud the jingling of sil
ver in the dining-room, and somebody
coming through the passage-way to the
kitchen.
I'm a little woman, by the grace of
heaven, and I can slip iu almost any
where, and it came into me mind that
thin was the time to slip, and down I
went into the tub, letting the cover
down over me,with just my finger in
the crack to get a peep, and if I didn't
see enough to satisfy me.
Two men—bad luck to them ■ —wid
crape over their faces, and pistols in
their hands.
"I told you there was 110 one here,
Jim," says one.
And I knew his voice, and the hands
of him, with a crooked finger on one—
a man that had been pretending to
want work of the master.
"I heard something," says he, "and
I'll look about me."
Then he poked around, paping over
and into everything.
"Tne family is out," said he, "but
that divil of a Bridget might le here,
or the other girl, Nora."
"They're safe asleep upstairs," says
the first.
"They'd better stay there," says the
other, "for I'd think nothing of silenc
ing the two. This is a good haul, Jack
—solid stuff."
I'd as soon put a bullet through a
screeching woman as not," said the
other. "Bee here—here's a pocket
book."
It was mine, with jist ten shillings
in it, but I didn't mind rae money at
that minute.
They took it out and counted it and
divided it,and they seemed in no hurry
to go, the villains.
"The silver is in the bags," I heard
them say.
"Maybe there's clothes in the tuh,"
says the one ; and he lifted the lid of
the one next to inc.
My heart gave a great flop, and I
gave myself up for gone.
"You'd be an idiot to take wet
clothes along with you," said the oth
er.
"Here, while we're waiting for the
chance to go, let's have a bite. Here's
a good leg of mutton and some bread."
The impudence of the thaves !
But sure the next minute I'd just
lifted me head to pape again, when
crack came the lid on it, and I knew
the craythers were sitting on the tubs,
taking their supper.
I was nearly dead with the blow, ami
I'd nave smothered but for a hole in
the lid that wa3 there, glory to hea
ven !
And I lay still,doubled up like a frog
and heard them chew.
And wither it was the fright or the
closeness, I don't know, but I fainted
Terms, SI,OO per Year, in Advance.
dead that minute.
Whin it WAS daylight, Nora waked
and missed rae, and diessed and came
down.
The minute the saw what had hap
pened, she rushed out to the street
shrieking for help, and In came the po
lice and neighbors, and sure they said
I was in the robbery, end had let the
thaves in, and me lying unknownst in
the tub useless.
They sent Nora for master and mis
sus, and nobody had the sense to look
for rae, until missus, heaven bless her,
says, says she.
"I'd trust Biddy with untould gold.
Sure they've killed her. Look the
house through.
And then she turned so faint that
master run to the tub for water, and
lifting the lid, sure there was I, with a
broken head, and no knowledge iu it.
And the wonder is I didn't get car
ried to the dead-house and identified
for somebody else, the way it happened
to my cousin Simu l that came back
from a bit of journey to find them "wa
king" him, being took tor his own
ghost.
They took me out, and sure getting
;ne straight was a hard job, Nora said,
I'd been doubled up that long, but I
came to at last ; and it was owin' to
my seeiti' them, and being able to
swear who wan of thitn was, that mas
ter and missus got back the silver, and
the thaves were sent to goal.
"I wish you'd poked your ugly head
out of that tub, Miss Bridget," says
one of them iu the coort.
"But, bless the tubs, I didn't," says
I, "and here I am to confound ye."
Yes, Mr. Carpenter ; now you've
got the whole story, and make the uew
tub 3 if you lise ; but give me a bit of
the ould ones to reraimber thim by, 'av
ye plaze.
A Reminiscence of Gov. Morgan,
A neighboring merchant made .the re
mark in my healing, "We buy goods
and loose money. Morgan buys goods
and makes money." The meaning was
that Morgan generally struck the niarK
et in the right way and at the right
time,while others so often made blund
ers. Another old merchant exclaimed,
"Look at that Morgan that is buying
up everything. A little while ago he
came here green, and now he can give
his note for $50,000." The only mis
take in the remark was that Morgan
never was green. Politicians made the
same mistake. They supposed that a
man just inducted into office would, for
a while at llhs% need leading striugs.
Morgan . however, showed himself im
mediately the master of the situation
either in business or in public life. He
met every exigency with surprising
readiness. At one time, for instance,
he purchased an immense quantity of
tea at public auction sale, and the auc
tioneers told him that the amouut was
rather large for one man's note. Mor
gan's reply was: "I will give you your
own paper instead of mine." lie went
in Wall street and bought a sufficient
quantity of that very firm's paper to
meet the bill,and he never had to repeat
the lesson.
Not False.
Old Nelse Patmore was justice of the
peace. He could neither read or write,
but his friends assured him that such ac
comulishments were merely side issues.
One day Jack Maine sued the Common
wealth for false imprisonment. He em
ployed excellent legal council and every
one thought he would surely gain the
case.When the cause came up for trial
the judge said:
"Young man, de'dictment says dat
yer wants damages for false 'prison
ment V"
"That is exactly what we want, your
honor," said Maine's lawyer.
"Uh, huh."
"And we think, your honor, that we
are entitled to five thousand dollars
damages."
"Uh, huh," handling his papers.
"We claim that Mr. Maine's impris
onment was false."
"Uh, huh."
"And we can prove it."
"Uh, huh. Genermen yer say dat
de man's 'prisonment was false."
"Yes, your honor."
"Uh, huh. lie went ter jail, didn'
he ?"
"Oh, yes."
"Uh,liuh. What am de meanin'o'
false V Suthin what doan 'zist, ain' it?"
"Yes, sir."
"Wall, dis man went ter jail. Dat's a
fack ain' it ?"
"Yes your honor."
"Dat 'zisted, didn' it ?"
"Oh yes."
"Dat was't false, den. DP 'ci&ion O'
dis cou't am dis. De generman claim
ed to hab been 'prisoned falsly. De
proof shows dat de State didn' perten'
ter put him in jail,but did put him dar.
De cou't hoi's dat der want nuthin'
false 'bout dat. Now ef de State had
done it. Dat woulder been false 'prison
ment. I'll jes'sen'de generman back
ter jail an' fling de lawyers in de cost."
NO. 19-
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ff subscribers move toother places without
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i-.- 1 ———
ADVERTISING RATES.
1 wk. 1 mo. I.tmos. 6mos. 1\
1 square It 200 ft 100 | $5 00 ft 600 •
X " 700 10 00 15 00 30 00 4
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One Inch makes a square. Admlntstrat
and Executors' Notices |iJSO. Transient tub
tlsements and locals 10 cents per line for i
Insertion and 5 cents per line for each addltl
al Insertion.
HIMOROIB.
We can discover no traces of a 1
ness shop ever being called a bri
chamber.
Spring may be postponed on acce
of the weather, but the new spi
bonnet, never.
•Does yer kapc nothin' but
goods here V 'No, ma'am.' 'T
where will I lie after goin' for wa
ed silk V
'What is a lake V asked the teaci
A bright little Irish boy raised
hand. 'Well, Mikey, what is ii
'Sure it is a hole in the tea kei
mum.'
The census proves that the nun
of persons in a family in this com
is a small fraction over five. In &
families the husband is the small 1
tion over.
A person being asked what
meant by realities of life, answei
'Real estate, real good money a
real good dinner, none of which
lie realized with real hard work.'
Young fellows do not appr&
the blessings of living in the pre
age. Just think how little fun A
had as a masher.He only had a ch
to lie sweet on one girl, and he
compelled to take her or get left.
'And so you are engaged to
Flapdoodle ?' said Edith to her
friend Marie. 'Yes,' said Marit
thusiastically, 'and he's a perfect
of a man.' 'ls he a lawyer, phys
or merchant ? What is his busir
'Oh, he's not doing anything
but he blows on the harmonican ■
tifully.'
When Sugar Was Invented
The exact date of the inyentk
sugar is lost in the midst of
However, sugar is said to have
known to the Chinese three thoi
years ago, and there is not much <
but that the manufacture of the a
was carried on under the Tsin dy
two hundred years before Chris
strong claim for priority has been
for India. Probably the Hindoo
ed the art from the Chinese, Jtnd
China the news was carried fu
west. Three hundred and tweut
years before Christ, Alexander
Nearchus with a large fleet dow
Indus to explore the adjacent cour
When that officer returned from h
pidition he brought an accouut o
ey (sugar) which the Asiatics I
from cane.without any assistance®
bees. This was the earliest id®
western nations had of sugar, the®
Egyptians, Babylonians and G®
knowing nothing use. As 1®
A. D. 150 sugar was prescribed ifl
len,a famous physician, as a I
cine. Before the discovery of At®
sugar was costly luxury, used on!
rare occasions. During the wars I
roses, about 1445, Magaret Pasto®
of a very wealthy country gentle®
Norfolk, wrote to her husband b®
that lie would "vouchsafe" to sel
a pound of sugar. As late as ll
England consumed on!} twenty ®
pounds in the course of the ye®
since the consumption has grea®
creased,twenty million hundred ®
now bung used by the English j®
The process of refining sugar vfl
known in England preyious t®
That was probably an invention B
Arabs. A Venetian merchant fl
the secret from the Saracens of®
and sold the art for one hundred I
and crowns.
A Warning to Smokers!
A curious accident happer®
Paris the other day. Dr. R-—I
very open collars on his shi®
when walking along the Rue (I
girard somebody threw a light®
stump out of the window. The!
received the gracious offering®
nape of his neck. He tried ®
hold of it, but it eluded his gr®
tumbled down his back, burn®
dreadfully in a number of place®
with pain he rushed into a wii®
but before hi could strip his h®
a mass of blisters.
The doctor did not know ®
thrown the cigar stump, bi®
stander noticed the window ®
from and the doctor sent for fl
man. The person who thre\®
gar proved to be a Monsieur (fl
gentleman of means, who w!
much shocked at the result ofl
prudence and offered a con®
sum of money to the doctor I
the matter up. But the latte®
to be appeased and threat®
bring an action for criminal I
ness. Should be succeed the!
may griefvo iu jail Crwr tben®