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" MILLHEIM JOURNAL."
Distance.
Mow mnny leagues of weary laud and sea
Can place lliy spirit tar apart Irom mine?
Can lure from distance dim some silent aign
To set my soul enfranchised lar lrom thee—
Afar from eyes that never leave nie free,
From tones that stir my heart like mounting
wine,
From prcsenco thralling as sotno dream di
vine?
Alas! by night and day all stay with me.
There is no distance —not for thoso who know
The silent countersign that makes them one,
Whose thoughts are messengers thai burn and
glow,
With love's fleet messages the winds outrun.
Go, sail the seas! Go, seek the rising sun!
Beyond my constant heart tfiou const not go.
—.Mary Cltrntner.
On Account of a Card.
"I shall never forget my experience
in a mountain district of Arkansaw/'
said Capt Mellvine, when the conver
sation had turned upon adventure.
"There are many pleasant occurrences
that we forget, but an affair of horror
remains with us. The memory of a
pleasant dream soon passes away, but
the recollection of a nightmare be
comes a mental landmark. Sometime
ago I was instructed by my employers
to repair at once to the White Oak
mountains and buy all the cattle that a
reasonable sum of money would induce
to leave the rugged trails. I boarded
a railway train, and was soon rushiDg
toward my destination. Sociability is
a prominent feature of my nature,
which I suppose is an heirloom left by
long experience as newspaper reporter:
and I had not been long on the train
until I had formed the acquaintance
of several gentlemen, among them a
United States deputy marshal, who
gave me his card with an evident air
of pride in being connected with so
prominent an institution as our gov
ernment. At a small station, a long
haired man, a genuine native of Ar
kansaw, 1 surmised, boarded the train
and took a seat opposite me. 1 was
desirous of hearing him talk in his
quaint dialect, and moved over, ad
dressed him and handed him my card.
He looked at the card significantly and
carefully placed it in an old black
pocket-book. He eyed me nervously
for a moment and then asked:
"'Whar mout yer be goin'?'
" 'White Oak mountains,' I replied
'I get off at Patsey station.'
"He looked at me with an earnest
ness, an uneasiness of gaze that I
could not understand, and said:
" 'I reckin you'll find it rite pleasant
up thar. Best lot o' fellers yer ever
seed, an' they ain't afeerd, lemme tell
you.'
"I could not divine why their physi
cal courage should in the least add to
the pleasure of my visit, but suppos
ing the remark grew out of his admir
ation for men who are not 'afeerd/ and
that such information would lighten,
in charming anticipation, the fatigues
of the journey, I did not ask him to
explain. He did not seem to 'cotton'
to me, as the planters sometimes say in
expressing predilection, and he left
his seat and stood near the door. I
approached him again, feeling more
than ever an interest in him, and ask
ed him if he had ever been among the
White Oak mountains.
" 'Have I got fingers and toesr' he
replied.
" 'I can answer assuredly concerning
your fingers, and can speculate with
chances in my favor in regard to your
toes.' I said in facetious attempt.
" 'Wall, then, I've been thar.'
'Many cattle in that country?'
" 'Yes, an' yer'll find some of them
putty hard to han'le, lemme tell yer.'
"'My friend, I must confess that
you puzzle me. I have asked you sev
eral very civil questions, expecting civ
il answers, but you are so evasive that
I can get no satisfaction.'
" 'Yer're gone to school, hain't yer?'
" *Y es.'
" 'Talk Latin, I reckin'.'
" 'My knowledge of Latin is limited..
"'lt's what they call a dead talk
ain't it?'
"Yes, it is a dead language.
" 'Then yer mout need it ar'ter a
while.'
"'I don't understand you. Your
meaning is as dead to me as the lan"
guage in question is to the unlettered
world.'
•"So much the worse for yer. J
reckin' yer air sorter proud o' yer learn
in' an' it may be all right to fling out
yer book business at every man yer
see, but it don't speak o' very soun'
sense, lemme tell yer. In my country
when a man gets to spoutin' like yer've
been doin', we put him down as agrin
nel an' don't have nothin' more to do
with him.'
"By this time the train was slacking
up at a station. The brakeman shout
ed 'Patsey,' and in a moment more I
was standing on the platform. The
next business to be transacted was to
hire a horse, which I did after consid
erable trouble. Just a- I mounted
and started across the rugged country,
Wat IIUHImm Journal
DEININGER &. EuMILLER, Editors and Proprietor?
VOL. LVII.
I saw my long-haired acquaintance on
a mule, riding rapidly in the direction
I was to take. I called to him, but he
made no reply.
"My instructions ware to call on a
gentleman named Harvey. I learned
that he lived about fifteen miles from
the station, and when night came on I
had considerable trouble in pursuing
the right course. Hurrying clouds ob
scured the moon, and 1 could only get
an occasional glimpse of the narrow
and deflecting road. Suddenly my
horse stopped and snorted, i urged
him, but he would not proceed. 1 dis
mounted to ascertain the cause of his
fright, when I was soLvd, and, despite
resistance, bound and gagged. There
seemed to be quite a number in the
party of captors, for while bound to a
horse and hurried along, I heard nu
merous suppressed voices. We must
have travelled several miles over a
country rough with ravines and al.
most precipitous with hillsides. When
we stopped 1 was rudely lifted from
the horse and taken inside a log house
built so close to the mountain side that
an immense rock formed a sido w all of
the structure. I was placet! upon a
bench and my hands were untied. I
saw around me ten or twalve rough,
looking men, heavily armed. They
were fierce in action and determined
in expression. 1 had pleaded with
them, ere they put the gag in my
mouth, but now they bad restored to
me the use of articulation, .1 sat mute
and almost stupefied.. At every
turn I saw great copper vessels, and
off to the right, where my eyes inadver
tently wandered. 1 saw a rude corn
mill and a pile of corn.
" 4 So you've come oat hereto take
us to the penitentiary, eh?' said a
large, grizzly-bearded man, stepping in
front of me.
" 'Xo/ 1 replied. 1 never heard of you
before. I came to this country to buy
mountain cattle.'
" 'An* I reckin you've foun' more of
'em than you can buy.'
" T don't understand you. 1 don't
know why 1 was brought here. 1
never harmed any of you. and why
you should inflict punishment on me is
something 1 don't understand.'
" 'Oh, he's powerful innocent,' ex
claimed a fellow, who looked at me
with an expression of blood-thirsty re
venge. 'He don't know what we mean
now because he ain't got his crowd
with him.'
" 'That's the way he's tryin' to work
it,' exclaimed a man who leaned
against one of the copper vessels, 'but
turn him a lose an' he'd show us/
" 'Gentlemen, you—'
" 'Gentlemen,' repeated a score of
voices. 'Did you hear that? He's git
tin' powerful meek.'
" 'Young feller/ said the grizzly
bearded patriarch, 'we're goin' to put
a mighty tellin' lesson afore your eyes
We're citizens of this here Amerikin
gover'ment, and don't want to be pes
tered in the exercise of our natr'l
rights. Our forefathers fit an' bled
fur the 'stablishment of this Xewnited
States, an' we think we've got a right
to make whiskey when an' whar we
please.'
" 'Now you're talkin'; put it to him.'
chimed the chorus.
"'You may be a brave man,' contin
ued the patriarch,'an' may be discliarg"
in' your duty, but it's our duty to see
that you don't. We could have killed
you easy enough without puttin' our
selves to the trouble of fetchin' you
here, but we wanted to furnish an ex
ample to a young feller that turned
traitor. We want to hang you rite
afore his eyes an' then hang him.'
"A groan arrested my attention, and
looking around, 1 saw a young man
bound hand and foot, stretched upon
the floor.
'"That young chap,'continued the
grizzly leader, 'went down to Little
Rock some time ago, an' as we found
out by your raid, turned traitor on us.
Ef it hadn't been for him you wouldn't
now be so close to whar the revela
tions of the gospel ends an' whar the
real work of eternal punishment be
gins. Hold the young feller up an' let
the sinners look at each other.'
" 'Gentlemen, I never saw the young
fellow before, I declare. There must
be some mistake here. What do you
think my business is, anyhow? For
God's sake do not act until you know
what you are doing! Heaven knows
I did not come here to harm anyone.'
" 'That talk mout amount to a good
deal afore a judge an' jury, but afore us
it only amounts to what it's worth/
" 'What am I charged with. Give
me a chance to defend myself.'
" 'lt wan't expected that you'd want
a chance. A man that is so bold as to
come rite out as you have done
oughter know that if he's tuck thar
ain't no chance fur him. Fetch the
rope, Josiah!
The young man addressed immedi
ately appeared with the rope. I begged
and prayed, but they slipped a noose
over my neck, and, throwing the rope
over something above, tightened it.
MILLHEIM, FA., THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER <>, 188.1.
" 'Before you murder me,' I gasped,
tell me what I've dona'
" 'You are a deputy United States
marshal on the hunt of distillers/ re
plied grizzly beard.
• '"1 am not I am a cattle buyer.
Xo one can prove that 1 am a deputy
marshal/
"T reckin' 1 kin,' replied a voice
and before mo stood the long-haireti
man I had met on the train.
" 'I did not tell you that 1 was depu*
ty marshal!'
" 'No, but ver give me yer ticket,'
and he produced a card bearing tin
name and address of 'J. M. lVlten
United States Deputy Marshal.'
"Then 1 realized how the mistake
had occurred. The deputy marshal
bad given me his card, and when 1 in
troduced myself to the long-haired
man, 1 had, without noticing it, gives
it to him. 1 made an elaborate expla
nation, and in proof, told them te
search my pockets, where they wouM
find several cards bearing different
names, but would find at least iifh
bearing one name, which was my own
They dill so, and to *k the rope from
my neck, and also liberated the youmj
man who they thought had turned
informer.
"1 was soon liberated and allowed t<
mount my horse. The grizzly man
gave me instructions in regard to the
road to Harvey's, and bade me good
night in a spiiitof friendship. When
1 had gone about fifty yards some one
called to me to stop. 1 did not know
whether to flv or obey, but knowing
that the distillers could, by their know 1
edge of the country, soon head mo off,
I stopped. Pretty soon old grizzly aj
peared.
" 'Here,' he said, handing me a lu.>t
tie, 'take the moonshine along with
you. It's the best, an' along towards
the turn of the night you'll find it
mighty strengthenin'. Don't say any
thing about our pleasant meetin' fur
you mout be sorry fur it. flood bye.' *'
An Incident of the Crimen.
A formidable mine hail been dug and
loaded u nder the M.tlakolT tower. If
General MacMaiion had not chanced to
discover in the barrack one wire lead
ing from a well-concealed voltaic-pile
to a large quantity of powder under it,
and another connecting it with the
powder magazine, the whole victorious
force might have been blown into the
air after having gained possession of
the fort. The wires were cut, but the
powder magazine could not be found.
Some of the French soldiers were set
ting lire to the empty gabions which
had been thrust into the small win
dows of the bomb-proof cellar under
the tower, in order to barricade it
One of the gabions appeared to be
moving. A French officer called out
that if any one was there who could
speak French he might come out with
out fear. The gabion was pushed
through the window, and a very
young Russian officer crept out. He
was assured that lie and any others
surrendering as prisoners of war would
be well treated. After saying a few
words in Russian at the window lie
was joined by four ollieers and 200
common soldiers. They begged,
through him, to be taken away at
once. This request suggested some
knowledge of an impending explosion.
The young officer was therefore ordered
to point out the position of the powder
magazine. The lad made no answer.
A French subaltern said in a loud
voice to the commanding officer that
the Russian ought to be shot if lie re
fused to obey the order given to save
so many lives. The youth kept si
lence, with a haughty glance of indig
nation at the subaltern, apparently for
supposing that he would betray a
secret under a threat. The French
chief formed a platoon to shoot him
and lie turned to face his executioners.
An old Russian major, who seemed to
understand French, ran forward, took
the commandant by the hand, drew
him to a heap of earth, and pointed
downward. The earth was quickly
shoveled away, and barrels containing
88,000 tons of gunpowder were dis
covered. A strong French guard was
placed over them. The young Russian
officer was told to go with the other
prisoners. He gave a military salute
and kissed the old Russian major's
hand. "Do not blame him for show
ing you the powder," he said in French
to the commandant, with a trembling
voice and tears in his eyes. "He is
my father."
Would Just About Suit.
A pretentious person said to the
leading man of a village, "How would
a lecture by me on Mount Vesuvius
suit the inhabitants of your village?"
"Very well, sir; very well indeed," he
answered; a lecture by you on Mount
Vesuvius would suit them a great
deal better than a lecture by you in
this village."
A PAPER FOR THE HOME CIRCLE.
TnuiMPiis OK oi.n AGE.
Hlint Hit* Ootoffrnr*iia, le I.earia and
r.i lcaoii Have A coini>llainl.
Two notable examples are now bo
fore (he public, of men whose sinews
have waxed not old whose eyes are
not dimmed and whose natural force
is not abated by the eighty years
which (le v have lived in tho world.
One is DoLosscps, the famous canal
builder, whose mental force, physical
Rtlength and moral audacity, might
well be the envy of men half his years.
Just emerging from his conlliot with
the English connnaAder and tho khe
dive during the Egyptian war, when
alone he defended the neutrality of the
Suez qanid, he has entered into a con
tract with tho English government to
build another without yielding a sin
gle claim or demand which he made
when the khodive threatened him with
English vengeance, nor, regardless of
international consequences, taking a
backward step. In tho meanwhile he
is pushing forward the Panama canal
project, which is to the Suez canal
what au Alpine tunnel is to a country
ditch, obtaining money, ignoring pro
tests and objections, and bringing to
its support an indomitable will and a
self- assertion, possessed only by the
master-minds of war and statesman
ship. Although eighty-one yeais of
age lie is the husband of a compara
tively young wife and the father of
eleven children, the youngest of whom
is only a few weeks old. His public
projects are as far reaching as if he
were but fifty; his physical vigor
equal to his mental force. The com
bination at such an age is very rare.
Another instance is the inventor t
Ericsson, of the same age as De Les
seps, and in all but his years a young
man yet. It is more than twenty
years since his invention, the Moni
tor, arrived in Hampton Roads just in
time to prevent the United states
forces from being driven from tho A ir
ginia peninsula. .Since that time, na
val warfare has befcn revolutionized
again. The low, creeping iron-clad is
a thing of the past, unless against an
immense armament and the steel-eov
ered fleets of the modern navy. To
meet this formidable enemy Ericsson
has dived beneath the water, and |his
torpedo boat, the Destroyer, is expect
to be "the cheap defense of nations"
against the monsters which all first
class governments row own to keep
one another in order. His solar en
gine. destined to store up and use tne
sun's rays in tropic latitudes for the
purposes of irrigation, is still on his
hands; but of its success little doubt
is expressed. At any rate, his fore
score years seem to find him as hope
ful, active, vigorous and industrious
as at any period of his life.
.Such lives are exceptional, but not
solitary instances. Dandolo, Doge of
Venice, won some of his greatest na
val victories at eighty, and stormed
and captured Constantinople at the
age of ninety; Benjamin Franklin
was as bright, inventive and active
in his seventy-fifth year as in his fifti
eth; Goethe was nearly eighty when
he wrote the second part of "l'aust;"
both Bacon and Newton were far ad
vanced in years when they made some
of their most notable discoveries. But
these are marvels in human history,
and well entitled to provoke attention
and curiosity. If a man survives his
sixtieth year, he is generally well con
tent, even if active and strong, to live
upon his past fame and achievements
rather than to undertake new enter
prises or plan new projects.
The Value of Manner.
We have heard it said that you can
do everything, however unpleasant it
may be to those around you, if you
only do it in the right way; and the
instance given to prove the truth of
this assertion is taken from humble
life. A cat walks daintily into a room
on a cold winter's day, and with a be
nign glance at the company and a me
lodious purring sound she walks leis
urely round, selects for herself tho
warmest place in the room—perhaps
the only warm place, right in front of
tho lire—curls herself up and goes se
renely to sleep, secure that no one will
be so unreasonable as to question her
right to sleep wherever inclination
prompts her to sleep. Xo one calls it
selfish, no one is annoyed, because she
has done it so prettily and gracefully.
Indeed, every one experiences an ac
cess of warmth and comfort in them
selves, from beholding pussy's blissfu 1
repose. Now, imagine the same thing
done in a different way, and by a less
self-possessed individual. If it were
done hurriedly, or noisily, or clumsily*
or diffidently even, or in any way ob
trusively, what a storm of indignation
it would excite in the bosoms of all be"
holders? How thoughtless, how incon
siderate, how selfish! Xo, it must be
done as the cat does it, without a
sound or a gesture to provoke criti
cism, or it must not be done at all.
EYES THAT SEE NOT.
Ilrlng of tho Kind That ore K*ported
to Fill Voconclea —Artlflclnl Optica.
"We sell from 100 to 150 artificial
eyes a year," says a Philadelphia op
tician, "and the demand seeins to grow
greater every year. There is a very
large nominal profit on these goods,
for they sell at $lO to sls each, accord
ing to grade; but when you consider
tho trouble and annoyance the fitting
involves and tho timo it consumes,
you can easily see that they are well
worth the price charged. We never
have a customer that is satisfied with
his new eye at tho first 'trying on'.
Within a day or two he comes back
and claims that the color is a shade
lighter or a shade darker than the
good eye, or that they don't match in
some other way. There is only one
thing for it. We must go over our
whole stock until tho eye is matched,
and our time and trouble must count
for something. We have a number of
steady customers, who always buy
their eyes of us, and bring them to us
to bo cleaned and repaired."
"Where do you get artificial eyes?"
"They are made atStutzbacb, in the
Thuringian fore.-t.in Germany, and tho
works employ a large force of skilled
workmen. It is wonderful how close
ly they imitate the human organ of
sight. 1 don't believe there is an eye
that cannot be almost perfectly match
ed."
"Do artificial eyes wear out."
"Oh, yes, an eye wears out in about
two years. The salt and other alka
line substances in the tear duct event
ually eat off the polish and the inner
surface becomes rough, and requires
to be repolished."
"We have some customers—nervous
and excitable people—who are con
stantly changing their eyes, and not at
all to the betterment of their appear
ance. Others provide themselves with
several eyes, and use them alternate
ly. "Their wearers must take them
out at night and keep them in clean
water, for the secretions of the eye
would otherwise gather upon them.
Moreover the muscles that keep them
in place, require frequent, rests."
"What, are the eyes capable of
movement?"
"One of the great prerequisites in
the removal of an eye, when it becomes
necessary, is to leave the surrounding
muscles intact. This is generally done
by experienced oculists, but sometimes
cases come to us in which the muscles
have been remorselessly destroyed, and
then we find it almost impossible to
make the artificial substitute look nat
ural. I know a pretty young lady
whose glass eye will stare stolidly and
solemnly at you, as if the owner were
inwardly accusing you of some grave
offense' while her natural eye is twink
ling merrily at the joke that she is lis
tening to or at something tunny that
she sees. Once, when she was looking
into her pocket-book for some change
with her good eye, that terrible artifi
cial eye twisted itself around in my
direction and glared at me with a mal
evolence that frightened me. It was
only then that 1 discovered that it
was a glass eye, for it was very well
matched. When I subsequently exam
ined the young lady's case 1 found that
nothing could be done for her. She
must go through life subject, to all
kinds of misunderstandings, just bo
cause a surgeon who didn't understand
his business, had bungled over the op
eration on her eye. 1 know, also, an
old gentleman, whose right eye beams
with intelligence and amiability, while
his left glares gloomily forth with an
air of utter disgust and dissatisfaction
with the world.
The First Prayer in Colorado.
Father Dyer, a Methodist minister,
was the pioneer preacher in Colorado.
He brought prayer over in a wheel
barrow before any of the Pullman
sleeper preachers arrrived. It is re
lated of Father Dyer that when he first
landed in what is now Denver he saw
before him a large tent, and to that,
supposing a camp meeting was in
progress, he wended his way. To his
astonishment he found—not a camp
meeting, but a very extensive series of
games, such as faro, poker, keno and
the like, going forward. lie remained
about the tent for forty eight hours,
looking very intently upon the progress
of the games. At the end of that
period he stepped upon a table and
said, in a voice loud enough to be laeard
all about him: "Boys, I have looked at
your game now for the past eight and
forty hours. Now, I ask you to give
some attention to mine. Let us pray."
They had not known before that the
solemn-looking man was a minister,
but at the invitation hats were taken
off, chips were dropped, and all bowed
their heads in prayer, with Father
Dyer leading. And that was the first
public prayer uttered in the Pike's
Peak country. After the prayer had
been concluded the games were re
sumed
Terms, SIOO Per Year in Advance.
CIIUDKEN'S COI.LMS.
Do.
Do tho best you can at all times, and
that is saying a good deal. Do your
work, as a general thing, before you
play. Do rest when you are tired, if
you possibly can. Do sleep at night
rather than in the daytime. Do keep
your feet dry and warm, and your head
cooL Do live cheerful and happy as
possible, and make all those about you
as much as in you lieth, and In order
to do this keep healthy, busy and ac
tive—soul and body.
The Monkey mi ft the Nugar.
A recent English writer gives the
following illustration of the sagacity
of animals, which will interest our
young readers, if not their elders as
well:
I remember once, in India, giving a
tame monkey a lump of sugar inside a
corked bottle. The monkey was of an
inquiring mind, and it nearly killed it.
Sometime, in an impulse of disgust, it
would throw the bottle away, out of
Its own reach, and then be distracted
until it was given back to it. At
others, it would sit with a countenance
of the most intense dejection, contem
plating the bottled sugar, and then, as
if pulling itself together for another
effort at solution, would sternly take
up the problem afresh, and gaze into
it.
It would tilt it up one way, and try
to drink the sugar out of the neck,
and then, suddenly reversing it, try to
catch it as it fell out at the bottom.
Under the impression that it could
capture it by asurprise.it kept rasping
its teeth against the glass in futile
bites, and warming to the pursuit of
the revolving lamp, used to tie itself
into regular knots round the bottle.
Nothing availed, however, until one
day a light was shed upon the prol/
lem by ajar of olives falling from the
table with a crash, and the lruit rolling
about irr all directions. His monkey
ship contemplated the catastrophe, and
reasoned upon it with the intelligence
of a Humboldt.
Lifting the bottle high in its paws,
A e brought it down upon the tloor with
a tremendous noise, smashing the
glass into fragments, after which he
calmly transferred the sugar to his
mouth, and munched it with great
satisfaction.
Bravo, Stick !
One day in autumn a line flower
bulb was planted some five or six
inches deep in the rich brown ground,
and a stick that the gardener had
found lying in the field just outside
of the garden gate was stack near it.
"Well," said the stick, in a dry little
voice,as soon as the gardener had gone,
"1 never thought to be brought into
this beautiful garden, at which I have
been peeping through the fence for a
month or more. I wonder if I am to
live here always? 1 hope so."
"If you do live here always," cried
the flower bulb from her snug resting
place, "1 don't see what good it will
do you. You're only a stick, and a
stick you'll remain. Now I—and, by
the-bye, if it hadn't been for me you'd
have staid in the field, for you "were
wanted only to mark the place where
I am planted—l shall greet the spring
with handsome green leaves and the
summer with lovely blossoms."
Now it happened, before the winter
was over, a hungry mole burrowed its
way iuto the garden, and sniffing about
in search of something to eat, found
all the roots and bulbs too bitter for
its taste with the exception of one—
the very one that had spoken so boast
ingly to the stick—and that it speedily
devoured. And so when spring ar
rived nothing came from the spot
where that bulb had been placed to
greet her.
But, lo and behold, the stick had
taken root, and was covered with the
prettiest tiny green leaves. The gar
dener, coding that way, looked at it
with wonder. "Why, that's the stick
I picked up outside last fall," said he.
"I'll let it stay there, and see what it
comes to." And it came to a sturdy
treelet, covered before the summer
passed away with fragrant pale pink
flowers. Some chrysanthemums, who
had heard the conversation between
the bulb and the stick when they paid
their autumn visit,cried, "Bravo, stick!
you have done well, but how did you
do it?"
"Oh, I tried so hard!" said the tree,
let, in a mellow little voice; "and I
never lost heart, no matter how cold
the winter wind and snow. But I'm
sorry the mole ate the poor flower
bulb."— Harper's Young People.
In the English navy only lime juice
is used, and scurvy is practically un
known. In the merchant marine ser
vice lemon juice is chiefly used, be
cause it is cheaper, and cases of scurvy
are frequent. The trouble is tha
lemon juice soon becomes inert an
useless bv fermentation.
N EWS1 J A rER LAWS.
If crabarribers oriler the discontißOition of
newspaper*, the publishers may continue to
psi'd them until aJI arrearages are paid.
If subscribers refuse or neglect to take their
newspapers from the office to which they are
stmt, they are held resiionsible until they
have settled the bill* and ordered thom dis
continued. .
1 f subscribers move to other places with
out informing the publisher, and the newv
papers are sent to tho former place of resi
dence, they are then responsible.
ADVKRTISINO RATKS: .
I ununrn .. I 1W $2 00 $3 00 S4OO Ii # j
fll" 80 4 001* 6 01.1 10 I 15 01
I ff ...iliinin f6 00 S 001 12 00 20 00 VOS
r column.::::::: 9,111,1 ' wnn ' <n ,°° 4
On* inch tnakm* square. Adminintrntoni inU Ei
•cutore' Xotu .-B 52.50. Transinnt advortlwwnenU and
locals 10 cents i**r line for tiret insertion and 5 centa per 1
1 liut* fur each additional inaartion.
NO. 35.
The Woods in Autumn.
i.
Flashes of gold that Heck the sober grey,
Dark ruddy tints that crimson in the light;
Soft streaks of silver glimmering pearly
white,
Amid the russet browns half hid away;
Pure green of spring that lingers while it may;
Patches of ivy-foliago dark as night;
Rich purple shades that peep out from the
hights:
n.
Such crown with glory the September day,
Oh, autumn woods! I lie beside tho stream
That winds you round about so lovingly,
And rapt in 6ense ol wondrous beauty, see
now vain must be ambition's lofty dream
To rival tints like yours, or dare to trace
Yourpeifect harmony, your perfect grace.
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.
• An old landmark—"For Sale."
The heated term—"You're a liar!"
The first rifle team —the pickpockets.
A man who breaks his word—the
stutterer. #
Ice-cream may taste good but it's
cold comfort after all.
Rulers sway the people, out the
school-master sways the rulers.
The meanest man out is one who
knows who will be next president but
will not tell..
Henry Bergli opposes angling because
it not only lacerates the fish, but en
courages lying.
Out in Illinois if a man washes his
face twice a day and wears a collar,they
call him a dude.
The man who drinks nothing but
cistern water is the one who leaves
well enough alone.
Adam was not a polygamist, al
though in his day he married all the
women in the world.
If you hear a man say that there is
very little gambling going on at pres
ent you can safely infer that he knows
no better.
Young Muggins recently became a
party to a very interesting sleight-of
hand performance. His girl gave him
the mitten.
Another nihilistic plot has been un
earthed in Russia. When the czar en
tered the breakfast room the other day
he found two American cucumbers
and a melon right on his plate.
"Were you iD the late war?" asked
a veteran of a badly demoralized citi
zen who came hobbling down the street
on a crutch. "I don't know how late
you mean," was the sad reply; "she
gave me this one last night before
tea."
Limit of Human Swimming Speed.
The utmost limit of human swim
ming speed is two miles in one hour,
and nine miles has never been done in
five hours. Yet in the face of these
facts, we are told that a young woman
swam, June 30, eighteen miles in l3ss
than five hours, the truth being that
she swam six or seven miles and drift
ed the remainder of the distance. We
also learn that a man swam in the
Iludson twenty miles in six hours; and
also read of two gentlemen, who, only
a few days ago, swam five miles in one
hour and ten minutes. A simple illus
tration will reduce these erroneous re
ports to their fundamental absurdity.
Suppose that three ordinary swimmers
be thrown into the East river, foot of
Eighty-third street, New York, at the
middle of ebb tide. Let the first swim
down toward the Battery, anu in about
fifteen minutes he will pass the Black
well island hospital, having, according
to the new style of report, swum a
mile and a half in fifteen minutes. Let
the second man lie on his back and
float, without moving hand or foot. In
about twenty-five minutes he will also
pass the hospital, without swimming a
stroke. Let the third man swim up
stream toward Harlem, and in about
forty-live minutes he will find himself
drifting, feet first, down by the hospi
tal. He could not have swum there,
for he swam all the time in the other
direction. A little study of these ex
amples would tend to increase '.he ac
curacy and intelligibility of swimming
reports.
Taming a Wolf.
At a recent meeting of the anthrop
ological society of France, at which
the supposed descent of the dog from
the wolf was discussed, M. Ilarbour
din said that he had brought up a wolf
that was as gentle as a lamb. It was
also remarkably intelligent, and could
open the doors by turning the handles.
When it heard a clock strike it would
stand on its hind legs and move the
hands round with its paws. It
fond of perfumes, and lived on the
best of terms with poultry and other
animals, but had a great aversion to
cats. M. de Mortillet, on the other
hand, said that he had been endeavor
ing in vain to tame wolves. lie found
them gentle enough so long as they
were young, but they became savage
at the adult age.