A Light Howe ttory. The Ship Shoal light at the mouth of the Atchafalaya, sixty miles south of Bras hear, La., is under the charge of Ed. Dunn. He has three assistants. The light overlooks a dreary waste of swamps and salt water, and is entirely isolated. On February 15th, two of the assistants started for Morgan City in a small sailboat to buy supplies. As they did not return Mr. Dunn supposed that they had leen lost in a storm. On Washington's birth day, however, while his third assistant, Mr. Leach, and himself were coal-tarring the roof of their dwelling, they sighted a •mall boat three miles south of the light. There was a dead calm. It was about three o'clock in the afternoon. After scanning the sail through a glass, they w re positive that it was the light house boat. It contained, however, ouly one man. Dunn directed Leach to pull out to the beat and see what was the matter. Leach did so. He found a straosrer at the helm. The man said that he had bought the boat from three men in Morgan City for SIOO. He was bound for Pascagoula. Leach told him that the boat belonged to the light house, and demanded her return. At first the man refused to give her up. Alter ascertaining that Leach and Duun were the only persons at the light house, he said that Leach might tow her in and he would steer her. Thereupon Leach fastened a line to the sail boat, and as the water was smooth and there was not a breath of wind, he towed her to the light without difficulty. They got there about 6 P. M. Duun closely questioned the stranger, and as there were neither pro visions nor clothing in the boat, he felt satisfied that he had stoleu it. He says that he would have sent Leach to Moreau City with the fellow if be could have handled the light alone. As it was he de termined to await the arrival of his mis siDg assistants, fancying that they would charter some other boat at Morgan City and return. He fed the fellow, who seemed willing to work and made no effort to escapo. On the night of February 25, Dunn bad the watch from 6 o'clock to midmsht. He had wound up the revolving machine at V o'clock, when he was startled by pistol shots, and repeated cries of 4 *Help!" aud %, Murder I" He flew down stairs and found every thing quiet. It was very dark. Groping his way to his valise, he got a revolver, and started for the room where the small lamps are kept, to get a light. On the way his torni was outlined against a window. There was a flash, and as quick as thought a pistol ball was buried in his shoulder. Dunn fired at the flash, and again received a bullet in the shoulder, lie fired three times m succes sion. The lire was returned, and a bullet struck him in the side. Then all was still. Dunn reached the lamp room aud struck a ligh:. On descending to the ground floor he met Leach coming IU from the gal lery. One side of his face was cut away, exposing his jaw anil teeth. He was covered witn blood. He said that the stranger had assaulted him with a hatchet, he also had three pistol balls in his booy Dunn made a search for the assailant. He could not find him in the dwelling. Pre sently they heard an iron trap door fall. The desperado had fastened himself in the watch room in the light house. DJUII then dressed Leach's wounds as best he could and put him to Ded. The rest of the night he stood watch at the foot ot the stairs. As he ha Ino more cartriges he armed hiniseii with a carving knife and ship scraper. The screen stopped revol ving at 12,30 but the light kept burning until morning, giving no light except at eight different points of the compass. Ail the next day and all the next night Dunn stood watch at the foot of the stair way. The deepersdo remained quiet. Hsd he known that Dunn's ammunition had eiven out, he would undoubtedly have detcended and renewed the fight. Leach suffered teriibly from nis wounds. He was excessively weak from loss ot blood. There was no light on the night of the 26th as the assassin maintained his block ade. At IP.M. of the 27th a steamship bound for .New Orleans hove in sight Duun swung out the American colors union down, but the vessel did not stop. She acknowledged the signal with three whis tles and went on her way. Alter she had passed, the desperado called for a parley. He was faint and hungry. He had been shot in the kuee joint. The pain was so great that he asked for mercy. By this ame Leach had comparatively regained his strength. In the morning he had made some coffee and shared it with Dunn, They asked the as sassin to surrender his arms. He passed the pistol and hatchet through the trap door and surrendered. After his descent. Leach ana Duun locked hun in one of the bedrooms and nailed the shutters tight. Here he was kept until March 2, when a vessii was hailed and he was sent to 2sew OrleanE,; accompanied by Leach, who sought surgical assistance. In Mew Or leans the piisoner was recognized as Jim Woods, a notorious desperado. Tuko that Risk. "Also to hire tor funeral and other oc casions, dress suits of the finest quality," it a line at the bottom of a recent adver tisement by a Brooklyn tailor. "Do many per pie borrow su'ts for fune rals ?" we asked. "Do they? Well 1 wish you would stop a minute or two aud see them come along," said be, adding : "Why I thought it would suit a public demand, having in view only those who are included in what are called 'the masse?,' but even i was astonished when I found well-to-do peo pie, merchants, officials, politicians, and, in short, every sorts of people, applying for overcoats, coats, trousers, or whole suits in which to attend funerals. Very often a poor man finds the cost of the bur ial of a relative leaves bim no money for his mourning suit, which after all, he would wear only one day. Quite as often men in better circumstances decide to at tend a funeral almost at the last moment. Again, there are a great many men who are so careful about their money that they hire suits for ad imaginable occasions ra ther than buy them outright." "What do YOU charge?" "Oh, we will loan a satin-lined doeskin overcoat for a deposit of S2O, and when it is returned we will keep $2. Here's a black beaver suit for the same money, and here's a common, though very genteel suit that we will loan for sl. We have a hun dred suits for all sizes ages and style 3 of pei sons. We inquire about the persons we loan them to, but sometimes they fail to return the clothes. We are obliged to take that risk." Snow Sboei For Horses. Stages began running regularly into the Yosemite Valley byway of Milton in May. Sleds drawn by horses are used in travel ing over the snow. The animals are pro vided with snow sfcoes, consisting of blocks about thirteen inches tquare and one inch m thickness, to which suitable attachments are fixed on the upper side for the purpose of securing the foot. The hones readily learn to manipulate these apparently clumsy appendages, and make excellent progress over the anQw. AGRICULTURE. A PECULIAR FENCE. —There is a kind of fence in use in some of the districts in Queensland wmch are infested with mar supials, of which an account is giveu in a recent number of the Queens!ander. The fence is made of wire aud saplings, the lat ter being used in the same way as paliug. There are various ways of constructing this fence, but the most popular method niav be described as follows: Round sapling posls are procured of durable timber from seveu to eight inches iu diameter and nine to ten fe t long. Three auger holes are bored iu them, one about four leet a ovc the ground and the other two wiltiiu a foot of cacti other at the uppermost end of the post, be gi lumg about six or uiue iuehes Trom the top. These posts are inserted iu the grouud from two to tLree feet, according to the nature of the soil, and at twelve feet distauce asunder. Due wire of Mo. 6 gauge is theu run through the lowest bolea and t.ghtcued. Next saplings of biigalow, iron-wood, ti tree or iron liark are procur ed. aud if too stout for use as cut, are split m'o two, three or more pieces, until light enough to answer as palings, l'hey are generally cut from six to scveu feet iu length, so as to allow trom six to nine in ches for insertion in the soil, aud to leave no less than five or six feet above. A se cond wire of No. 10 gauge is then run through the same hole as contains No 6, and is loft slack. Alter making the trench for the foot of the palings in lines betweeu each poet, these are placed in position along the trench and against the tightened wire, as close as posible, and the smaller sUv k wire is passed around each paling and round the tight wire, proceeding thus uut.: the whole space between each post is filled up sung aud clofe. Tha earth thrown out iu forming the trench is then put back against the foot of the palings and pressed or rammed iu. In the remaining auger holes above the palings wires of No. S gauge are uext passed aud properly tight ened, aud a marsupial or dingo-proof fence is the result. Goon POINTS OF A HORSK. —In buying a horse, lo k first to his head and eyes for sigus of intelligence, temper, couiage and honesty. Unless a horse lias brains you cannot teach him todo anything well. If had qualities pred >miuate iu a uorse, education ouly serves to enlarge and intensify them, l'he head is the trie indicator of disposi tion in the horec. A square muzzle with largo nostrils evideuces an ample breath ing apparatus and great lung power. Next, see that he is well cut under ihc jaw bones broad and wide apart under the throttle. Breadth and lulluess betweeu the ears and eyes is always dcairab e. The eye should be lull and hazel iu color; ear 6 small and thin, aud tbrowu well forward. The horse that turns his ears back until they almost meet at the points is not to be trusted. He is a biter or a kicker, and is sure to be vicious in other respects. A horse with a dishing face is cowardly, aud a cowardly brute, besides being naturally vicious, cau never be trained to do auy thing well. A horse with a rounding nose, tapering foreward and a broad, full place below the eyes, is always treacher ous and mischievous. Avoid a long-leg ged, stilty horse, fcelect one with a short, straight back aud rump, withers high and shoulders slopiug, well s<.t backaad broad, witb good depth of cLeet, forelegs short, hind legs straight, with the hock low down, short pasteru j )iulß, aud a round, uiulisn toot. By observing the above hints a horse may be selected that is graceful, good uatured, serviceable, and a prize to the owner. THE FARMER'S WORK. Every warm, sunshiny day makes the farmer nervous and fidgety, as it lemiuds him of the early coming ot the time when his spring ami summer work will crowd him aud deuiaud all his bodily strength to accomplish it. The good farmer maps out his plans, es signs for each field a certain crop, gets all his tools, implements and appliauces ready so that when the proper time arrives he can strike in without delay. His slock from now tiff giaas comes reqiures extra care and shelter from the cold spring storms, and the relaxing influence of spring weather, which effect alike the dumb animal aud the human one. CORN AND PORK. -Experienced porkrais er3 in the West have determined on the fol lowing ratio as to the relative value of corn and pork: When corn is 30 eenls per bush el, pom an be sold at #3 per 100 pounds net; when corn is 40 cents, pork must bring $4; and so on at the rate of an advance of $1 for every advance ot 10 cent* in the price or corn li pork sella at a price below this ratio, it is made at a loss—t above, the ex cess is clear gain. THX common practice is to keep hogs in a growing and fattening state without forced exercise. An exception byway of an experiment, was recently made wub a boar on a Pennsylvania farm. He was well and liberel.y fed, but was forced to take a good run in front of a boy every day. His offspring were muck more vtg orous of constitution than were pigs from boars that were confined all the time. A ASOOND early crop of potatoes fully matured is more paohtable than a very early one, as the latter are dug lefore completing their growth, and the price re ceived is not equal to the value of a full grown crop. r Ahe Early K>se # aDd Beauty of llebron can be dug in July aud the ground put in turnips, giving two crops the same year. "DON'T go chopping away at the branches," said an old woodman to his son. "Lay your ax at the root of the tree/' And, like a dutiful boy, he did as he was toid. He laid the ax at the fool of the tree and then went off for a day's fishing. A UTIOA clergyman had occasion to refer in n sermon to the prophet Jonah, and the report says that he delicately spoke of him as having "passed three days and three nights lu the whale's— ahem—society." "I AM going to tell you a true story, " said Uolonel Bragger, "and truth you kuow i 3 stranger than fiction." "Yes, the kind that you put in yonr true stories beats liction blind," remarked a by slander. "Gocng at half price," said the sign. "How much is that tea pot?" asked an old lady. "Fifty cents, mum," was the response. "Guess 111 take it," she said, throwing down a quarter. The sign was taken in. "WHAT 1 should like to know," said a School Board official the other day, "is how the mouths of rivers can be larger than their heads. '•CHEESE it," said the rat to the trap. "I will," said the trap, "and with baited breath 1 await your coming." "All right," responded the rat, 'laud I'll wire you the result." "JOHN," said the teacher, "I'm very sorry to have to punish you." "Then don't; I'll let you off this time," responded John. WHAT is better than a "promising young man?" A paying one. DOMESTIC. REMOVAL OF GRKASK SPOTS. —Fatty oils have a greater surface tension than off of turpentine, benzole or e'her, Hence if a grease spot on a piece of cloth be moistened on tbe reverse side with one of these sol vents the tension on the gre;isy side is larg er, ami therefore the mixture of benzole and fat or grease will tend to move toward the main grease spot. If we were to moisten the centre of this soot with ben zole we should not remove it, but drive the grease upon the clean portion of the cloth. It is therefore necessary to distrib ute the benzole first over a circle surrouud lugthe grease spot, to approach the grease gradually, and at the value lime having blotting paper iu contact with the spot to absorb the fat immediately. Another method, namely, to apply a hot iron on oue side, while blotting paper is applied to the other, depeuds upon the tact that the surtace tension of a substance diminishes with a rise of temperature. If therefore the temperature of different poriious or sides of the cloth is different, the fat acquires a tendency lo move from the hotter parts toward tie cooler. Unrb Sam'it M#n. Uncle Saui's letter-carriers are a hard working set of meu, and are liable to con tract rheumatism because of the constant exposure to which they are subjected. Calliug at the p wi-office the reporter had a pleasant conversation with Mr. J. 11. Malleru, one of the moat popular and clever letter-carriers in Indianapolis. Mr. Matteru said that, while iu the army dur ing the civil war, he sprained one of his ankles, which was always worse iu the spring during the period of the rapid cnauges iu the weather, lie did not find much relief from the several remedies he applied. But two years ago he hit U|KJU St. Jacob's O 1, and experienced wonder ful relief from its use. Several applications of the Great German Remedy relieved hiui entirely. The reporter talked with others among the letter carriers and found that lbs great German Remedy was popular in the pos:-office. Tuey use it for sore feet, rheumatism, etc., and praise it highly.— Jndiunapoli (Ind.) Sews. How TO MAKE PEHCIL WHITING TXEF KACKABLX. — It Is said tnat pencil drawings may be rendered ineffaceable by thin sim ple pri>ceßs; slightly warm a sheet of or dinary drawing paper, then place it care fully on the surface of a solution of white rosin in alcohol, leaving it ♦.here lony enough to become thoroughly moistened. Afterward dry it in a Current of air. Pa per prepared in this way has a very smooth surface. In* order to tix the draw dig, the paper is to be wanned for a few minute- 1 . This method may prove useful for the preservation of plans or designs, when the want of time or auv other cause w II rot allow the draughtsman reproduoiag them in ink. A simpler plan than the above however, is to brm-h over the back of the paper containing the charcoal or pencil sketch a weak solution of white shellac in alcohol. We see In the JTew York Spirit oj the Times mention of the cure of Mr. Ueorge Drake, 46 Fifth street, Indianapolis, Ind., of a severe case of water rheumatism, bv the use of bt Jacob's OiL— Cincinnati Enquirer. BITS of toilet soap that are too small to keep in a soap dish, and yet too good to throw away, can be saved until a suffi cient amount has accumulated to pay fr utilizing them. Then put them in a little tiu basin and piace on a stove until the soap is melted. Next stir ia enough pow dered poiuice st>ne to give the mixture a grayish tinge, and pour the melted muss into a wet cup or other vesiel that will serve as a mold, and set in a col place to harden. 'lbis will turn ont is a hard cake that will be found first rate for cleauing the hands when they are stained with fruit, etc. On Thirty Day*' Trial. The Voltaic Belt C v. , Marshall Mich., wli send their Electro —Voltaic ILlts a id othei Electric Appliances ou trial for thirty days to any person afflicted with Nervous Deb.lity Lost Vitality, andkm-iredtroubles, guarantee ing complete restoration of vigor and man hood. Andre s as above without delay. P. B.—No risk is incurred, as 80 days' trie.! is allowed. MAXT oilcloth mats last but one winter, when if properly cared for they would last much longer. The reason is that as a general rule too many tacks are put in them when they are first laid on the floor. It is a good plan to let the oilcloth lie without any tacking for two or three days until it is flat and the danger of wrinkles forming is over. If it is bound with car pet binding, this should be sewed OB with a stout linen thread, with long stitches. Then a very few tacks will serve to keep h in its place. Lydia E Pinkham's Vegetadle Comp > and is a remarkable remedy for all those pain ful complaints and weaknesses so common to our best female population, bend to Lydia E. Pinkham. 233 VVe9tern Avenue, Lynn, Mass., for pamphlets. A TIM* and trouble saving invention Is to have a piece of sheet iron nearly the 9ize of the bottom of the oven; a tiifle smaller, so that it will slide in and out Without difficulty; have the edges turned down so that the iron will be slightly rais ed from the bottom of the oven. Ou this nearly the who'e of an ordinary quantity of cookies can be baked at one*. It is nice also to uso when bak'ng cream puffs, kisses, or lady fingers. When bakiug the two latter put a white paper on the iron. Have a small hole cut IU one side of the iron so that it can be hung up. The Chinese must go,and all Americans should go—and buv a bottle of Carboline, the deodorized petroleum hair renewor and dresser. Since the recent improvement, no preparation ever had such a sale or gave such general satisfaction as Carbohne. Sold by all druggists. WE should make it our nim to lighten our dally toil every way possible—doing all things well. All the work possible sho lid be done in a sitting posture. Save your feet. The high stool cannot be praised or reoommended too highly for this purpose. Furniture and cooking utensils should be light but strong. Chairs mit 1 perforated seats are an improvement on the solid ones, and granite iron ware ahead of all other ware.. Make the best of everything, and be happy while you may. VEGRTIXB. —No medicire has attained such a great reputation as this justly cele brated compound. THE yolk of a hard boiled egg cut in bits with a sharp knife makes a pleas,ag addi tion to the sauce made of butter, tiour and witer for baked or boiled fish. To GIVE glass great brilliancv, wash with a damp sponge dipped in spirits,then dust with powdered blue or whiting (lied iu a thin muslin bag) and polish witn a chamois skin. IN a late paper, Dr. Jaraea Geikie shows the great size of the Gulf stream and its vast influence upon northern clima tea, and concludes that the opening of the proposed canal across the lath LUS of Pan ama will have as much effect upon the Gulf stream and the climate of North western Europe as the emptying >t a tea potful of boiling water into the Arctie Ocean would have in raising the annual temperature in Greenland. Why are you Dillon*. Because you have allowed your bowels to become costive, and liver torpid. Uuo Kidney-Vort to pmduoe a free state of the ItowMs, and it will stimulate the liver to proper action, cb'auso the skin of its yellowness, cure bilious headache, and cause new life in the Mood. Druirglsts have it, both dry and liquid— Ziont Herald. SLICED sweet potatoe pin will bo a new and and welcome dish to some cooks. Siea ui the potatoes till tender, not soft; then cut in thin slices. M ike an upper and under crust for the pie; season with ginger and spice the same as you do a squash pi*. If you prefer, you may mash the potatoes and cook with milk and eggs, and then you will have a mock squash pie. GINGER pound cake, if made with care, is excellent with c>ffe for breakfast. Take one cup an J a half of sugar, one cup of New Ot leans molasses, three cans of flour, four eggs, one tablespoonful of gin ger and of cinnamon, one tea spoonful of soda dissolved in a lutie hot water. Hake in shallow pans, in a moderate oven, for half an hour. BATTLE CREEK Mich., Jan., 31. 1879. GENTLEMEN —Having been afflicted for s number of years with indigestion and general debility, by the advice of my doctor I used Hop Hitters, and must say they afforded me almost iustant relief. 1 am glad to be üble to testify iu their be half. THUS. G. KNuX A o xiD way to prepare apples at this season of the year, when they are almost tasteless, is to pure them, cat them iu quarters and steam until they are tender; then put them in an earthen dish aud pour over the sauce a little weak vinegar, just enough to flavor them a trifle. In th s put some uuground alepice aud a utile sugar. "Since taking 'Dr. Lindsey's Hlood Searcher,' that old running sore of mine is entirely healed up. It's a sure cure. FRITTER HATTER. —One pint of flour, halt a pint ot milk, one tablespoouful of salad oil or butler, oue leaspoouful of salt, two eggs. B?at the eggs light. Add the milk and salt to them. Pour half of this mixture on the flour, and when baaten light and smooth add the remainder aud the oil. Fry in boiliug fat. Don't Die In the House. Ask Druggists "Rough ou Rat*." It dears oat rat-, mice, bed-bug*, roacues, ver min, ll.ee, ante, insect*. 15c. per box. FTKAMKD JOHNSYCAKI- —Beat one ties ■eit spoon! ul o! sugar with two eggs, add two leaapoonfuls of buttertmlk, half a tea cuptul of soda, or enough to sweeten the hut'ermilk, a little salt, on* cuptul of Hour and meal 'to thicken. Steam from and a half to two hours. Allen'* Brain Food, Cures Nervous Debility and Weakness of Generative Organs, $1 all druggists. Send for circular. Allen's Pharmacy, 313 First av. N. Y. PorxD CAKK. —Ous pound of butter, one pound of sugar, one pouud of flour, twelve ogtrs work the butter to a very light cream, add the pulverized sugar and beat thor oughly; now add the well beaten yolks, an i beat well again; stir in the well-beat en whites, and the flour very lightly. Bake in a large mould, in a slow but steady oven, about an hour. By a Iteoi'iit Important Improvement Dr. liol nan h:w pe-fecred a great addition o the eillcacy and usefulness of liolinan's Pads in the treatment ot persistent Chro nic To FRY smelts: Wash and scrape them cut off the flns, dip tkem in lieaten and cracker crumbs, or simply roll them m flour, fry in bailing fat; garnish with fried parsley or with fresh water cresses Vegetine. SAYS a Boston phvsickin, "has no equal as a blood purifier. Rearing of its many wonderful cures after all other remedies had failed, I visited the Lat> ir.itory, and convince 1 my>elf of Its merit. It is prepared from harks, roots and herbs, each of whlea is effective, and they are compounded IU sucu a mauuer as to produce astonish.lig results," Veicetine Is the great Blood-thuifler. Vegetine Will cure the-worst c ise of .Scrofula. Vegetine Is recommended by physicians and Vegetine II:ts effected some marvelous cures In cases of Cancer. Vegetine Cures the worst cases of Canker. Vegetine Will eradicate Salt Rheum from the system. Vegetine Removes Pimples and Humors from the face. Vegetine Is the great remedy for General Debility.] Vegetine Is acknowledged by all classes of people to be the best and most reliable blood puri fier in the world, Vegetine IS THE BEST SPRING MEDICINE. Vegetine is Sold by all Pruggists. THflne answering: an advertisement wll eonier a favor upon the advertiser and the publisher by statii g that they saw Ihead v rtlHSineui tn this journal. liHimiie |>ap* ** <>p Week can bo made in any 1 >oality voo Something entirely new for agents. ifs out fit foe. G. W. INGKAHAM & cO„ Boston, Mass VOTTIVHI TWIT?V If > ou to learn Tele iVUtI VJ ill XJ i" graphy in a few months, and be certain of a situation, address VAIJfcIMTINE BROS. Janesvilla. Wisconsin. MfAA A Month For .lien or Ladies In a light business near home. Send for Circular, r. W. ZIEGLER & CO., 915 Arch St, Philadelphia, Pa T H RES H E RSSSBsH tree. THK AULTMAJf & TAYLOR CO.. Monsflsld.Q. AIIIHBa Morphine llabitiurwl In 10 I ll#| 1 IHfl to 20 days. Jfo pay till Cared, VI I wlwl DR. J. STICI'HENS, Bebanoo. Ohiu. HUMOROUS. SUE was a real sweet looking lady, with a sealskin sscque and a big plush bat, and Bhe stood on the steps of an uptown resi lience, ahd just pul'ed the bell. "I called to see," said she to the lady of the house, who was very red in the face from frying doughnuts ovir the kitchen flre, 44 if you wished to give anything to the heathen to day." "No, I don't want to give anything to the heathen to-day. I just gave the wo man next door a piece of inind about her scalawag of a boy that br>ke down my plauls. That's all 1 can affurd for the heathen just uow." "lit H l fit " Du it. V. riacoß: Dear Sir —Lut full my daughter was in a decline and every b > ly thought she was going iuto the consumption. I got her a bottle of your "Favorite Prescription/' and it cured her. Of all druggists. MRS. MAUY UINSON. DOWN at Old Bridge, in New Jersey a woman got a forioru man ao drunk he couldn't stai'd, aud then she scut for a Justice of the Peace, aud while some of the neighbors held the unhappy and lim ber jointed bueclmnuleau up, she married him. Thut'H the kind of a hairpin a New Jersey woman is. When ehe has once made her "mash," no cold conventionali ties of our false and much veneered eoeial institutions may stand between her love if the upplcjack uulv holds out. Montrose, Ivan. Weak lungs, spitting of hlood, con sumption, and kindred affections, cured without a phy.-ician. Address for treatise, with two stamps. WORLD'S DISPENSARY MEDICAL ASSOCIATION, Buffalo, N. Y. Pat>-p I d m i house keepers do not in ........ u-.-u.a shall die on their hands, it they can hetp it. Au honest gentleman, past tne meridian of lite, was recentiy re r tuned a lease for which he was anxious to pay handsomely, for the simple rea son that tne person iucharge judged by his appearance that bis life would not be a long one and the proprietor "eTuld not afford to have a funeral on the premises." The New World's Disnemary and In valid's Hotel at Buffalo, N. Y., is now completed and ready to receive patients. "ANNIE," asked an ardent swain of a pretty girl. "Do you love your mother?" "Oh, indeed I do!" was the answer. "Well, then, will you give me a kiss for her sakef the lover asked. "No, John, I can't, do that; but you may kiss me for your mother's sake." And tbe young man did. IN Lmdon a lady prosecuted a hand some gentleman for kissing her at a rail way station, although he explained that he had mistaken her for some one else,and had at the same time apologized. lie got seven days hard labor. What made her mad was piob&bly the fact that the hand some gentleman had not kissed her for herself. Nature's Sluice-Way. The kidneys are nature's sluice-way to wash out the debris of our constantly changing bodies. If they do not work property the trouble is felt everywhere. Then be wise and as soon as you see signs Dt disorder get a package of Kidney-Wort and take it faithfully. It will clean the sluice-way of sand, gravel or slime aud purify the whole system. Druggists sell jt, both liquid and dry, and it is efficient n either torm — lndependent. A FINELY dressed lady slipped and fell n< ar the post office recently, and the gen tleman who helped her to rise inquired, 4 IVd you break any bones, madamef" "No, I guess not," she replied, "but 1 am just as mad as if I had broken a dozen of 'em." MOTHERS DO*'T KNOW-HOW MANY children are punished lor being uncoutn, wilful, and indifferent to instructions or rewards, simply because they are out of health! An intelligent lady said of a child of this kind : 4 'Mothersshould know that if thev would give their little ones moderate doses of flop Bitters for two or three weeks, the children would be all a parent could desire." AN aged Scotch ladv, knowing the hab its of her old and spoilt servant, when she wished a note taken without loas of time held it open and read it over to him. say iup, 4 There, noo, Andrew, ye kena'thats' in it; noo dinna st >p to open it, but just send it off. B ick to Youth. ROCHESTER N. Y. Jan. 8. 1880. H. H. WARNER A Co. : Airs—Your Safe Kidney and Liver Ouro made me feel like a new man after the doctors had given me up. HENRY GKBAU. 11k had owued a setter dog, and this was the story he told : 44 Yes, sir;* the way that dog was devoted to me was just amazing. Why, he heard me B*y to my wife that 1 was pressed for money, and he went aud died the day before the dog tax WHS assessed." f T <4 Can 1 go to the circus, dear mamma?" "No, my sweet darling; hut, if you wi 1 be good, I will take you to see your grandmother's grave.'.' Those unhappy persons who suffer from nervousness, headache, and dyspepsia, should u-e only "Sellers' Liver Pills." W HAT 8 ate is high in the middle and round at both eude? O- hi-o. IF we were to "give the devil his due,' what would become of us? As uow improved Dr. iiolman's pads well deserve Prolessor Loomis' high en dorsement. They are nearer a Universal Puuaeea tnan anything iu medicine. TRUST not him who seems more anxious to give credit than to receive cash. THERE'S no liir m in A glass of whisky— if you allow it to remain in the glass. • TIKSD NATURE'S SWEET RESTORER "-One third of the life of man 1B spent in sleep. It is of the utmost importance, therefore that the bed and its appurt-naooes should be of -uch a character as to secure ease and com fort. For this good feathers warm bedding aud flue hair matrasses are indispensable and the place to buy them is of reliable and ex perienced dealers. If you need anything in this line, th-n. go to Bternberger*s. His goods are all flrs>c:ass, his feathers odorless and steam-cured and warranted to g.ve per fect satisfaction. ftemember the place, H. 8b No. 1218 Market street, Phila<- deiphia. Dr. Kline's Ureat Nerve Restorer is the marvel of the age for all nerve diseases. All fits stopped free. Bend to 931 Arch Street, Philadelphia, Pa. AIBSSKS. AIOAAN * AI*EJ.T, Mutuai J!"" Building, Tenth and Chestnut streo e, n eye o. hand a superb stock oi extra Cne quality Dili mends, which thej offer at as low prices at stones or the first quality, perfect alikula ooio; tnfl shape, can be m*ia MRS. LYDIA E. PINKRIM, OF LYNN, MASS.I £ jj * y LYDIA E. PINKHAM'S VSBSTAELE COMPOUND. In a Positive Cure isral! l ueif Pah.ru I Complaints and "*— l -rnmn Mooiuiattu to our tx-at ft-mah population. It will euro entirely tiu worst form of Fsnutlo eon* plaints, nil ovarian trouble*, Inflammation and I"lot-ra tion, Failing and Dhplaociawita, and the ooasequent tplui i Wcaknuu, and 1* particularly adaptod to tin churigo of Life. It *lll dissolve and expal tumors from the uterus In un early eta-., of development. The tendency to caa ovruua humors t hero le clucked very speedily by its use. It rvtnoves fain Luces, flatulency, destroys all craving for stimulants, and relievos weakness of the stomach. It curve Bloating, liradarbua, Nervous Prostration, General boUllty, Hleoploasaoaa, lAipreesioa and Indi gestion. that feeling at bearing down, oauaing pain, weight and backache, Is always permanently cured by ite use- It M ill at ail tunc* and under all elrcumatanoea act In harmony with the laws that govern the female system. For the cure of Kidney Coin plaints of either ax this Otnpound is unsurpassed. LYDIA L I'lNkllAll'H VEGETABLE COM POUND is prepared at £3 and Western Avenue, Lynn, Noes. l*rice 91. Six bettics for $6. Sent by l mil In the form of pills, also in the form of lozenges, on receipt of price, ft |a-r bo* for either. Mrs. Pinkham freely euswers all letters ot inquiry. Bend for pamph let. Address as übova Mention thia paper. No family should be without LYDIA E. PI NYHAN *8 LIVLH I*l LI A. They cure constipation, hllimisaees and torpidity of the liver. St cents per box. AT bold by all llraggvoe. F IS A SURE CURE | ■ for all diseases of ths Kidneys and i LIVER 1 It liu epectfio action on this most Important i organ, enabling it to throw off torpidity and | 1 inaction, atimuiating the healthy secretion of | the Bile, and by keeping the bowels in free ' I condition, effecting its regular discharge, i SiMlnuin If you aro suffering from J IvlCXlCiriCta malaria, have the chills, I J ere bilious, dyspeptic, or constipated. Kidney- i j Wort will surely relievo and quickly crura. ( V In the Spring to cleanse the Bystem, every , J one should take a thorough oourse of it. |l il- SOLO BY DRUCCISTB. Prloefl J 1 ilhe ll'iirßl and Best Medicine ever Made. AcolmbinaUon or HOpi, Buchu, Man* drak|eu~J Dandelion, with uiue beet and most c%urs Uve pro ponies of all other Bitters, maltei\thegreau-1 Blood Purifier, Liver Reg U l\o tor, and lite ami Health taadormg Agent earth. No disease c\an possibly lone eartrt where flop Bitters are varied aud perfect are their OpcratiouajHA They £.V| uv uVa To nil who* o^npkytrenUcause Irreyularl ty of the bowels or%orinaty organs, or who ro quire an TOD!<- and mild Stimulant, Hopßitteri at* WithOU* into*- Icating. CtfvjJS No mailer whatyour lewllntrf or rrmptcras are what the dmeotvor ailwm-ut is use Bop Bit ter*. Don't wait until ■l°® But if you •uly feel bad or oia at on< ©. It may save your Ufe.lt haB sav *d hundreds. SSOO will be jmP'l for a c*l they will not cure or help. Do not aulfar V"' (, t ynur frießd* culler,but use and urge Shamm® oo "® Hep Q Remember, Hop Bitters Is T 'l®. drucped drunken nostrum, but the ® d Ikut Medicine ever made ; the "15 111 FBITID and ROrE" and no lurson or ag|H aboufcl bo without theiu. KTV-X srroßt .fijftjK n i.c.iun absolute end frrest -ifv.e eurel jflf&S fo; l>ru!.ennesn,u ieof onlurn. tobacco na-coti- a Ail sold bv drujrr! to. Seed Jfk W for Circular. Hop Bitter* If*. Ca., / (LOSIFFTEFJ BITTERS For a qnaner oi a ecnturv or more Hostettsr's Stomach Bitters has been the reigning speciflc for Indigestion, dyspepsia, fever and ague, a loss of phvsical stamina, liver complaint and other dis orders, and has been most emphatically indorsed by medical men as a health and strength restora tive. It counteract pa tendency to premature de cay, and sustains and comforts the aged and in firm. For sale by all Druggists and Dealers generally. PrCTJBVBQU. PA. 111 DEC! improved BOOT BEF.*. U IllLw 2fte. package makes 5 gaHone of a I delicious, wholesome, sparkling Temperance beverage. Ask yonr druggist, or sent by mall for sc. C. E. HIKES, 48 N. Delaware Ave., Ph'ia. ■III"!!STOPPED FREE ■ m Marvehw* tuooeu. b JL BS™ TfLM.SWS! FUt, F.piUpty ond Ntree AffuMon*. ■ IVTALLIBLK If token as directed. No Pitt oJUt ■ J firitday'tuM. Treaties and $2 trial bottlefreate ■ rK patients, they paying expreasaga. Send aamsL TDIITU 18 MIGHTY. Prof. MARTINKZ, ■ I la W I ■■ the Great Spanish Seer. Aetrologer / And P.roholofi.t, will, tor 30 eeote, with ue, height, \ eolor of ejee eed look of heir, .end e CORRECT PIC- ' _ I TURK of jour future buebend er wife, with seme, timei aad pleoe of meeting, end dele of marriage, peyoholog- a,' J leal); predioted. Menej returned to ell not eatufled. Mdrees Prof. L. Martinet lOMont'j PL,Bo.ten, Mam. (AAKII I :< )JLLtSCTOKB—A handsome set of cards for J f-oent etamD. A. G. BABSETT. Kocheater. N. T lb 11 HHg PH Bet work In the C. 8. for the money. Kl llalalN V KSTKHRKIBE CAKKIAUK co., ciu'ti, VVVWIIaVB- Territory Oiwen. Catalogue FK& Rupture! CERTAIN RELIEF AND CURE. MR. JOHN BPIRLBKRGKR, A PROMINENT citizen, indorses !>r. Sherman's Treatment in the mogt emphatic manner, as may be seen In the fol lowing communication: s "I hare r>ecn a sufferer from rapture far more then twenty years; have med all the best trusses in Philadelphia; paid'out lots of money, and been tortured aud tormented more than tongue can tell: but now, thank God, since I took your treatment I am myself again. I can work. ride, run, jump, dance and feel as safe atnl good as though I hau never been ruptured. Your treatment is a great bk hh ng to me; why, I would not take thousands of dollars to-day and go without 1L I have been tell ing my friends what a good thing It is, and recom meudiug them to try It I am well known here, and you may publish this for those who are afflicted and don't know you will have confidence in what 1 sav. JOHN SPIKLBHKOKR, To Dr. J. A. SHERMAN, NO. list Canal st., Phlla., Apr. 5, 'siL" Dealer In Hides and Tallow. Residence, 1314 N. 6th *(. DR. SHERMAN'S PATIENTS CERTIFY TO THE • BENEFIT DERIVED FROM HIS TREATMENT. We, the undersigned, have consulted Dr. J. A* Sherman, of Philadelphia office, 806 Walnut St., aud received hU treatment for Rapture, which af fords us entire satisfaction, and gives us pleasure In recommending it to others. We trtea trusses before consulting Dr. 8., from which we derived nothing but vexation, injury and an Increase of suffering: George P. Reuter, feed store. Kensing ton avenue and Front Street; Richard w.stwooa, 8816 Hope street, atx>ve Somerset; my photograph can be seen at I)r. Sherman's office; William Chal 1* era. paper mills, corner Front and Elm streets, Camden, N. J.; J. W. Early, confectioner. 487 8, Fifth street, Camden, N. J. Rupture Relieved and Cured by Dr. J. A. Sher man's method, wlthour the Injury trusses infliot or " hindrance from labor. Book, with proofs from doctors, ministers, merchants and others daring oust thirty-five years, who have been cured, mailed for 10 oenfa. Philadelphia office, 308 WALNUT street, Next days of consultation, May 8 4, 5, IT, 18,19 and 81hL, and June Ist an IM. Principal Office, 861 BROADWAT, N. Y. Days of consultation there, Monday, Tuesday and Saturday of each week. Q Nolman's Pad Acta by Absorption /A W A I Through the /I 1 'J JfEKVK FORCES and th I I CIRt'LLATION. TRASS MAJUU The OnJy True MALARIA ANTIDOTE. It Is the only known remedy that positively ex pels every vestige of malarial na.nt from the blood wrthout the use of poisonous drugs. It is m poa ltlr prevenfaflve aud cure. Dr. Hoi man's Stomach and Liver Pad is a sovereign reme dy for 4'bllln and Fever, and every other lorm of malaria, all stomach and liver troubles, nervous and sick headaches, chronic diarrhoea, children's diseases and many of the complaints peculiar to Female*. Speclat instructions free of cuarge by addressing G. W. Holman, M. D. Full treatise sent free on application. For sale by all. first-class Druggists, or sent by mall p'*t-pald om receipt of price. "Regular' Pad, $2.00; Lung Pad,. SB.OO. Beware of Rogns aud Imitation. Fad*. Awls for Or. uolmsu'i. Take, bo otber. HOLMAN PAD CO., Box 8112. 744 Broadway, Sf. Y 4 >ERNHARDT INVISIBLE Is a medicated Facw I j Powder of wonderful efficacy in beautifying the skin. removing freckles, pirn plea, and eomplenonal bh'inlßbes. Harmless!!! Fragrant!! Flesh and Pearl tint*. liiipotodbtetodetecttt* UHa,*c. by mail. Oldfleld k Oa, York, Pa. Send 3c. stamp for set of fancy cards. SURE CURE for Epilepsy or Fits in 84 hours. Free to poor. Da EKCBK.BS44 Arsenal sL.SU Louis. Mo. A tkU or Bsaaty Ma a Joy Forovor. DR. T. FELIX GOURAUD*S ORIENTAL AREAS, OB MAGICAL BftAUTIVm. 1OO*iuh "Gotf tarn's CUKAM" AS TKK LLUT HARMFUL or UL TBI are raara RATIONS." Also Poudre Bubtil* nana smparCueua hair without Injury to the skin. lfju.ll. RT. GOURAOD. Bole Projx. 48 Bond 9t, H. Y. For tale by all druggists and Fancy Goods Desist* feroughout the United Statas Panadas sad Eturoua *"y porcelain-lined Pumps are manufactured | under license,and buyers are guaranteed against any and all claims from the Company holding the patent. Don't fail to make a note of this point. ___________ tfJA I mzmem CU HEW Carefully made \ ALL Best Selected \JL\ Valuable Timber. \ Improvements. I wamsm Tha BLATCHLEY PUMPS are for Jala by the best houses in the tra e. Name of my nearest agent will be furnished on application to C. Q. BLATCHLEY, Manufacturer, 808 MARKET ST.. PHILADELPHIA, PA. I THE LARGEST FEATHER* MATTRESS AND BEDDING ESTABLISHMENT IN THE STATE. w ODORLESS® —a*— 1 GEESE m general stores. fl|* FEATHERS, |||i 70111 mer