Newspaper Page Text
TERMS OF PUBLICATION.
THK BEDFORD GAZETTE is published every Fri
day morning by MEVF.RS <K .WEASEL, at $2.00 per
annum, if paid strictly tn advance ; $2.50 if paid
within six months; $3.00 if not paid within six
onths. All subscription accounts MUS T he
settled annually. No paper will be sent out of
the State unless paid for IN ADVANCE, and all such
subscriptions will invariably be discontinued at
the expiration of the time for which they are
All ADVERTISEMENTS for a less term than
three months TEN CENTS per line for each In
sertion. Special notices one-half additional All
resolutb ns of Associations; communications of
limited or individual interest, and notices of mar
riages and deaths exceeding five line?, ten cents
per line. Editorial notices fifteen cents per line.
All legal Notices of every kind, and Orphans''
Court and Judicial Sales, are required by law
to be published in both papers published in this
All advertising due after first insertion.
A liberal discount is made to persons advertising
by the quarter, half jear, or year, as follows :
3 months. 6 months. 1 year.
♦One square - - - $4 50 $0 00 $lO 00
Two squares - - - 600 000 10 00
Three squares - - - 8 00 12 00 20 00
Quarter column - - 14 00 20 00 35 00
Half column - - - 18 00 25 00 45 00
One column - - 30 00 45 00 80 00
♦One square to occupy one inch of space.
JOB PRINTING, of every kind, done with
neatness and dispatch. THE GAZETTE OFFICE has
just been refitted with a Power Press and new type,
and everything in the Printing line can be execu
ted in the most artistic manner and at the lowest
ur All letters should be addressd to
MEYERS A MENGEL,
OASII BUYERS, TAKE NOTICE!
SAVE YOUR GREENBACKS!
FALL AND WINTER GOODS,
At J. M. SHOEMAKER'S Store,
AT GREATLY REDUCED PRICES!
Having just returned from the East, we are now
opening a large stock of Fall and Winter Goods,
which have been BOUGHT FOR CASH, at nett
cash prices, and will be SOLD CHEAP. This be
ing the only full stock of goods brought to Bedford
this season, persons will be able to suit themselves
better, in style, quality and price, than at any
other store in Bedford The following comprise a
few of our prices, viz :
Calicoes, at 10,12, 14, 15, 16 and the
best at 18 cents.
Muslins at 10, 12, 14, 15, 16, 18, and
and the best at 22 cents.
All Wool Flannels from -lOcts. up.
French Merinoes, all wool Delaines, Coburgs, Ac.
SHAWLS —Ladies', children's ar.d misses'
shawls, latest styles; ladies' cloaking cloth.
MEN'S WEAR—Cloths, cassiweres, satinetts.
BOOTS AND SIIOES--In this line wo have a
very extensive assortment for ladies, misses, chil
dren, and men's and boys' boots and shoes, all sizes
and prices, to suit all.
HATS—A large assortment of men's and boys'
CLOTHTNG—Men's and boys' coats, pants and
vests, all sizes and prices
SHIRTS, Ac.—Men's woolen and muslin shirts;
Shakspeare, Lock wood and muslin-lined paper
collars; cotton chain (single and double, white
GROCERIES—Coffee, sugar, syrups, green and
black teas, spices of all kinds, dye-stuffs, Ac.
LEATHER—SoIe leather, French and city calf
skins, upper leather, linings, Ac.
We will sell goods on the same terms that
we have been for the last three months—cash, or
note with interest from date. No bad debts con
tracted and no extra charges to good paying cus
turners to make up losses of slow aid never paying
customers. Cash buyers always get the best bar
gains, and their accounts are always settled up.
J. M. SHOEMAKER.
Bedford, 5ep.27,'67. No. 1 Auderson's Row.
10 per cent, saved in buying your
goods for cash, at J. M. SHOEMAKER'S cash and
produce store, No. 1 Anderson's Row.
The undersigned have Opened a very full supply
FALL AND WINTER GOODS.
Our stock is complete and is not surpassed in
QUALITY AND CHEAPNESS.
The old system of
'' TR US TING FOREVER"
having exploded, we are determined to
SELL GOODS DPON THE SHORTEST PROFIT
CASH OR PRODUCE.
To prompt paying customers we will extend
a credit of four months, but we wish it expressly
understood, after the period named, account w ill be
due and interest will accrue thereon.
BUYERS FOR CASII
may depend upon
n0v1,'67 A. B. CRAMER A CO.
lyrEW GOODS!! NEW GOODS!!
The undersigned has just received from the East a
large and varied stock of New Goods,
which are now open for
two miles West of Bedford, comprising everything
usually found in a first-class country store,
consisting, in part, of
Boots and Shoes,
All of which will be sold at the most reasonable
Thankful for past favors, we solicit a con
tinuance of the public patronage.
Ijf Call and examine our goods,
may 24/67. G. 1 EAGER
IVTEW ARRIVAL.—Just received
11 at M. C. FETTERLY'S FANCY STORE,
Straw Hats and Bonnets, Straw Ornaments. Rib
bons Flowers, Millinery Goods, Embroideries,
Handkerchiefs. Bead-trimmings. Buttons. Hosiery
and Gloves, White Goods. Parasols and Sun-Um
brellas, Balmorals and Hoop Skirts, Fancy Goods
and Notions, Ladies' and Children's Shoes. Our
assortment contains all that is new and desirable.
Thankful for former liberal patronage we hope
to be able to merit a continuanee from all our cus
tomers. Please call and see our new stock.
4 RAKE CHANCE IS OFFERED
J\_ ALL PERSONS
To display their Goods;
Tt sell their Goods:
To gather information;
To make known their wants;
4c., 4c. 4c. 4c., 4c., 4c., 4c., 4c.,
by adver-iiingiu the columns of TUB GAZETTE
BY MEYERS & MENGEL.
\ NOTIIER VETO ON~ HIGH
YOU CAN SAVE MONEY
by buying your GOODS of
Mann's Corner, - - - BEDFORD, Pa.
They are now opening a choice variety of
NEW AND DESIRABLE
FALL AND WINTER GOODS.
Hats and Caps,
Boots and Shoes,
Tobacco and Cigars,
Ac., Ac., Ac.
LOOK AT SOME OF THEIR PRICES :
CALICO, at 8, 10, 12, 15, 16.
GINGHAM, at 122, 15, 18, 20.
MUSLIN, at 10, 12, 14, 15, 18, 20.
fes!r Cassimeres,Cloths, Satinettsand
Ladies' Sacking, at very low prices.
feg- Ladies', Gents' and Misses'!
Shoes, Sandals and Over-Shoes, in great variety, j
6QT" Men's, Boys' and Youths' Boots. ■
feaT Best Coffee, Tea, Sugar and Syr
up in the market. Prices low
fegr Feed, Flour, Ac., for sale at all
fegr We invite all to call and see our
goods and compare prices before buying elsewhere.
feaV Our motto is, Short Profit fa.
feaT TERMS— Cash, Note or Produce.
0ct25,'1i7 _ _
Q~L A D TIDINGS
GOOD GOODS ARE DOWN!
SCH E LLSBURG AHE AI >!
NEW GOODS! NEW GOODS!
just received and will be sold
AT GREATLY REDUCED PRICES.
Call at BLACK A BORDER'S,
IF YOU WANT CUEAP GOODS of any kind !
We have no big stock of old goods at big prices.
Our stock is nearly all fresh and new. Look at
some of our prices :
MUSLINS, from 10 to 17 cents.
CALICOS, from 8 to 1"> cents.
CLOTHS and CASSIMERES at reduced prices.
DRESS GOODS, all kinds, cheaper than before
ALL WOOLEN GOODS 23 per cent, cheaper
than any that have been sold this season.
etc., etc., etc.,
at the lowest market prices.
If you want Good Bargains and Good Goods,
call at BLACK. A BORDER S.
Schellsburg, Dec. 6m3
IN T Ell IS COMING!
PREPARE FOR COLD WEATHER !
The undersigned hast just received from the
Eastern Cities, a large and varied stock of
which he will sell very CHEAP FOR CASH or
COUNTRY PROOI-'CE. All wool pants and vests
as low as $3.00 to $12.00 ; overcoats, from $3.00 to
$3O 00; cloths, cassimercs, cassinetts, Ac., of the
best quality, and at the lowest prices; under-cloth
ing, such as under-shirts and drawers, at $l.OO
each; also, flannel shirts, at $1.75.
He has also on hand a largo assortment of
such as ladies' dress goods, consisting of all wool
delaines; calicoes, at 10, 12, 15 aud 16 cents per
yard ; muslins, at 10, 12, 14 and 20 ; also NOTIONS
in great varioty; queensware, groceries, hoop
-1 skirts, cotton-chaia, tobacco and cigars, Ac., Ac.
And a good supply of gum coats and blankets al
| ways on hand. Gum blankets at $1.75.
Thankful for past favors, he would solicit the
I continued patronage of the public, feeling confi-
I dent that he can please all who purchase at his
store. Remember the place, the "Old Colonnade,"
southeast corner of Richard and Pitt streets. Bed
| ord, Pa. ISAAC LIPPEL.
TELL IT! EVERYBODY TELL IT!
COTTON NO LONGER KING !
G. R. OSTER & CO.
Are now receiving at theii NEW STORE a
large and carefully selected stock of new and
CHEAP Dry Goods, Furs, Clothing, Carpetings,
Oil cloths, Hats, Caps, Boots, Shoes, Wall papers,
Willow-ware, Queens-ware, Oils, Tobaccos, Segars,
Ac., together with an extensive assortment of Fresh
Groceries, which for extent and CHEAPNESS is
unrivaled in Central Pennsylvania, all of which
they offer wholesale or retail at prices that defy
competition. Piles of calico prints and muslins
from 6, 1 cents up to sublime quality.
They invite all to call, see for themselves and
TERMS . — POSITIVELY CASH on DELIVERY, un
less otherwise specified.
Bcoford, Pa., Dec.13,'67m3.
The undersigned hns opened, in Shafer's build
ing, on Juliauna street, a new
ROOK, STATIONERY AND PIC
Having purchased Ihe largest stock of Books nnd
Stationery ever brought to this place, at the low
est wholesale prices, he flatters himself that he
will be able to sell cheaper than any otherpersons
cngag din the same business. Ilis stock consists
in part of
Also Hymn-bcoks for all denominations, Episco
pal Prayer-books, Missals, Ac., Ac.
Children's Story Books, Toy Books, Books on
Parlor Magic, Books on Games, Song Books, Dime
Novels, etc., etc.
His stock of School Books embraces Osgood's
series of Read'rs. Brown's Grammars, Brooks'
Arithmetics, Davies' Algebra. R.aub's Speller, and
all the books used in the Common Schools of Bed
ford county ; also, copy-books, of all kinds.
Stationery of every description at the lowest
prices, will be found at his store, including Fools
cap, plain and ruled Legal cap. Letter cap, Bill
Paper, Commercial Note, Ladies' Note. Envelopes,
of all ki ids, and sues, plain, fancy, fine white
wove, Ac., Ac., Steel Pens, Pen-holders, SI ites
and Slate Pencils, Faber's Lead Pencils, of all
numbers. Ink-stands of the most beautiful und
convenient designs, and Inks of the best quality
at the lowest prices.
Also, a large assortment of Kerosene Lamps,
Plain and Fancy Soaps, Smoking and Chewing
Tobaccos, Cigars, Pen-knifes, Pertumery, Ac.
A specialty will be made of the Picture De
partment. Fine Large Portraits of Washington,
Lincoln, Johnson and other distinguished Ameri
cans. Fancy Pictures, Stereoscopes and Stereo
scopic Views. Picture Frames, Ac., Ac , will be
always kept on hand. Porte Monnaies, Pocket
books. handsome Port-folios, Ac. Also, Violins,
Accordeonsanit other Musical Instruments; Check
er-boards, Chess-men, etc., etc.
Hoping to merit the patronage of the public, he
has selected his stock with great carc, and is
bound to sell cheap to all who will give him a
Bedford, Dec. 13.
rill-IE INQUIRER ROOK STORE.—
I The subscribers have just opeued a Book and
Stationery Store, in the building adjoining the
"Inquirer Office," opposite the "Mengel House,"
lately occupied by Mrs. Tate, where they are pre
pared to sell all kinds ol Stationery, such as Fools
cap, Congress, Legal and Record cap, Long Bill,
Sermon Letter, Congress Letter, Commercial
Note, best-quality, Bath Post large and small, La
dies' note (gilt), Ladies' Octavo note (gilt), Mourn
ing different styles. French uote, Envelopes of all
kinds and qualities. Pass Books at least a dozen
varieties, Pocket Ledgers, Time Books, weekly and
monthly, Tuck Memorandums, twenty different
kinds, Diaries of all descriptions, Blank Books,
Long Quarto, Broad. L"dgers and Day Books, all
sizes and qualities, Chalk Crayons, Slates, Arn
old's Writing Fluids, Hoover's Inks, Carmine
Inks. Ch irlton's Inks, Sand, Pocket Books, all
kinds, Banker's Ca3es, Carpenter's Pencils, twen
ty kinds of other pencils, a variety of pens and
pen-holders, Stationer's Gum, Clerk's Indelible
Pencils, Gum Bauds, Pocket-b >ok Bands, Flat
Glass Ink Wells and Backs, School Inkstands,
Baromerter Inkstands with Rack, Pocket Ink
stands, Sand Boxes, Pencil Sharpeners, Receipt
Books different kinds, Copy Books, Composition
Books, Primers, A. B. C. Cards, Osgood's Spell
ers and Ist 2d, 3d, 4th and sih Readers, Brooks'
Primary Mental and Written Arithmetics, Mitch
ell's Intermediate Geography, Brown's Grammar.
Lossing's Pictorial History of the United States,
Sealing Wax, Blanks, Deeds, Blotting Pads, Photo
graph Albums, various kinds and sizes, Almanacs,
Ac., Ac. Persons wishing anything in this lino
will find it to their advantage to give tho "In
quirer Book Storo" a call. We buy and sell for
cash and expect to sell as cheap as goods of the
same class and quality can be sold anywhere out
side of the large cities.
n0v,29'07yl DURBORROW A LL'TZ.
4 GENTS WANTED throughout the
/\ State of Pennsylvania for the
UNITED STATES L,IFE INSURANCE CO. OF
NEW \ ORK.
ESTABLISHED IN 1850.
Capital and Assets about $2,500,000.
Apply to 0. HARDEN WEKPER.
General Agent fox Peuna.,422 Walnut St., Phila
r jpEKMS for every description of Job
| PRINTING CASH ! for the reason that for
every ariiele we use. w> most pay cash; and the
cash ysleui wiL enable us to do our work as low
as it can be done in the eities.
BEDFORD, PA., FRIDAY MORNING, DECEMBER 20. 1867.
We think the following very good :
For the Gazette.
I.inos to Ucr who'll understand ISioni.
I know a lady very fair—
Take care! take care !
At muling love an adept rare—
She'll play, and sing, and dance—
Take care! take care!
And steal your heart without a chance—
Beware ! beware ! .
Sly cupid lurks amidst her curls—
Take care! fake care !
Most winsome she of all the girls—
She'll talk, and laugh, and blarney you—
Take care ! take care !
A thing, perhaps, that you may rue—
Her neetared lips twin cherries are—
Take care ! take oare !
Her eyes are radiant as a star—
Beware ! beware !
Her form is lithe as elfin sprite-
Take care ! take care !
Her stop as buoyant, soft, and light—
A happy mortal who'd caress her—
Take care! take care !
A being divine—o ! may God bless her—
W. J. M.
BEX. GRAM'S TESTIMONY ItEFOIIE
HIE Uii'EAdHEV I IOU tUI I'EE.
I have seen the President very fre
quently in reference to the condition of
affairs in the rebel States. When I
was asked to be at a cabinet meeting,
it was because some question was up
in which, as general of the army, I was
interested. lam not aware of any in
terview with the President on amnes
ty. I have occasionally recommended
a person for amnesty. I thought my
self at the time that there was no rea
son why because a person had risen to
the rank of a General he should be ex
cluded from amnesty any more than
one who had failed to reach that rank.
1 spoke on that point. I did not see
much reason for the $20,000 clause.
These are the only two points that I
remember to have spoken of at the
time. I afterward, however, told him
that I thought he was much nearer
right on thes2o,ooo clause than I was.
I was present when the proclamation
was read in Cabinet, but my views
were not asked. I never gave any
opinion to the President that it would
be better at the time to issue a proc-
Irt.nnticn Ofcf illi i* ml 11.) .
I frequently had to intercede for
General Lee and other paroled officers,
on the ground that their parole, so
long as they obeyed the laws of the
United States, protected them from ar
rest and trial. The President at that
time occupied exactly the same
grounds, viz: That they should be
tried and punished. He wanted to
know when the time would come that
they should be punished. I told him
not so long as they of eyed the laws
and complied with the stipulation.
That was the ground I took. It applied
to every one who took the parole,
but that matter was not canvassed ex
cept in case of some of the leaders; I
claimed that in surrendering their ar
mies and arms they had done what
they could not all of them have been
compelled to do, as a portion of them
could have escaped, but they surren
dered in consideration of the fact that
they were to beexempt from trial so long
as they conformed to the obligations
they had taken ; and they were enti
tled to that; that is my view still; that
was my understanding of an arrange
ment which I made voluntarily. Gen.
Lee's army was the first to surren
der, and I believed that with such
terms all the rebel armies would sur
render, and we would thus avoid
bushwacking and a continuation of the
war in away that we would make
very little progress with, having no
organized armies to meet. I consid
ered that like terms were given to ail
the armies that surrendered after that.
I will here state that I am not quite
certain whether I am being tried or
who is being tried by the questions
asked. I have stated those views to
the President frequently, and, as I have
said, he disagreed with me in those
views. lie insisted on it that the lead
ers must be punished, and wanted to
know when the time would come that
those persons could be tried. I told
him when they violated their parole.
I do not consider that that applied to
Jeff. Davis; he did not take any pa
role. It applied to no person who was
captured, only to those who were pa
roled. The President contended that
General Lee should be tried for treas
on. I insisted on it that General Lee
would not have surrendered his army
and given up all their arms if lie sup
posed that after surrendering he was
going to be tried for treason and bang
ed. I thought we got a very good
equivalent for the lives of a few lead
ers in getting all their arms and get
ting themselves under control, bound
by their oaths to obey tiie laws. That
was the considerate vhieh I insisted
upon we had rec'i ed. The President
afterward Jts ■ greeii with nie on
thatsubie J never claimed that the
paroleg. _ meseprisoners any politi
cal right whatsoever. I thought that
that was a matter entirely with Con
gress, over which I had no control;
that simply as a General-in-chief, com
manding the army, I had a right to
stipulate for the surrender on terms
which protected their lives. This is
all I claimed. The parole gave them
i protection and exemption from punish
ment for all offenses not in violation of
the rules of civilized warfare so long as
their parole was kept. Mr. Johnson
seemed to be anxious to get at the
leaders to punish them. He would say
that the leaders of the rebellion must
be punished, and that treason must be
made odious. He eared nothing for
the men in the ranks—the common
men. Speaking of the Amnesty Proc
lamation, I could not see any reason
why the fact of a volunteer rising to
the rank of a General should exclude
him any more than any other grades.
With reference to the $20,000 clause I
thought that a man's success in the
world was no reason for his being ex
cluded from amnesty, but recollect I
afterward said to the President that
1 thought he was right in that particular
lar and I was wrong. I looked on the
proclamation as one which he was de
termined to issue, and as a thing sus
ceptible to amendment or improve
ment; I have given my opinion, per
haps, as to what has been done, bat I
do not think I advised any course my
self, any more than that I was very
anxious to see something done to re
store evil governments in those States.
I have al ways been attentive to my
own duties, and tried not to interfere
with other people's; I was always ready
to originate matters pertaining to the
army, but I never was willing to orig
inate matters pertaining to the civil
government of the Un ited States; when
I was asked my opinion about what
had been done I was willing to give it;
I originated no plan, and suggested no
plan for civil government; I only gave
my views on measures after they had
originated; I simply expressed an anx
iety that something should be done to
give some sort of control down there ;
there were no governments there when
the war was over, and I wanted to see
somegovernment established, and wan
ted to see it done quickly; I did not
pretend to say how it should be done,
or in what form. I will state here that
before Mr. Lincoln's assassination the
question about issuing a proclamation
of some sort and establishing some sort
of civil government there, was up, and
what was done then was continued af
ter Mr. Johnson came into office.
I have recommended for pardon Gen
Longstreet, Gen. J. G. French, George
H. Stewart, P. D. Roddy, Gen. Lee
and Gen. Johnston. I was in favor of
the North Carolina proclamation giv
ing that State a government. I was
in favor of that or anything else which
looked to civil government until Con
gress could meet and establish govern
ments there; I did not want all chaos
left there and no form of civil govern
ment whatever \ I was not in favor of
anything or opposed to anything par
ticularly; I was simply in favor of
having government there; I did not
pretend to give my judgment as to
what it should be; I was perfectly
willing to leave it to the civil depart
ment; 1 asked no person what I should
do in my duties; I was willing to take
all the responsibility and did not want
to give my views as to what the civil
branch of the Government should do;
I cannot say positively that 1 have
ever heard the President make any
remark in reference to the admission
of members of Congress from the Rebel
States; I have heard him say—and I
think I have heard him say twice in
his speeches—that if the North carried
the elections by members enough to
give them, with the Southern mem
bers, a majority, why would they not
be the Congress of the United Slates.
I have heard him say that several
times. I mean if the North carried
enough members in favor of the ad
mission of the South. 1 did not hear
him say that he would recognize them
as a Congress. I merely heard him
ask the question, "Why would they
not be the Congress?" 1 heard him
say that 111 one or two speeches; do
not recollect where. The President
alluded to the subject of the legality of
Congress frequently on his tour to
Chicago and back last summer. His
spe dies were generally reported with
considerable accuracy; cannot recol
lect what he said except in general
terms, but I read his speeches at the
time, and they were reported with con
I dul not dissent from tiie North
Carolina plan of reconstruction, at the
meeting of the Cabinet in which it was
discussed. I did 11 t intend to dictate
a [dan. I did not think I expressed any
opinion about it at the time; i looked
upon it simply as a temporary meas
ure until Congress should meet and
settie the whole question, and that it
did not make much difference how it
was done so that there was a form of
government there; 1 think I was pres
ent at the time by an invitation of
either the President or the Secretary
of War; I suppose I was free to express
my views; 1 suppose the object was
that I should express my views, if 1
could suggest any change; I did not
think I wasaskeil my views; 1 know
tiiat if I had been asked the question,
1 would have assented to that or al
most anything else that would have
given stable government there; in ref
erence to the opinion, I know it nev
er crossed my mind that what was be
ing done was anything more than tem
porary. I understand this to be the
view of the President and of every
dody else. I did not know ot any dif
ference of opinion on the .subject. lie
was very anxious to have Congress
ratify his views. Mr. Lincoln prior to
his assassination had inaugurated a
p ilicy intended to restore those gov
ernments. 1 was [.resent once before
VOL. 62.—WHOLE No. 5,423.
his murder when a plan was read. The
plan adopted by Mr. Johnson wassub
i stantially the plan which had been in
augurated by Mr. Lincoln, as the basis
! for his future action. 1 no not know
i that it was verbatim the same.
(•BEAT AMERICAS SHOW.
Bondholder to his wife. —Now, my
dear, we will ride out and see our show.
It is so nice to have a show of your
own, and such a show as never was
Go slow, driver, so as not to jolt mad
am and I!
You wonder, my dear, where I get
all my money. 1 will tell you now.—
You know that tin box which I kee,
in the bank? That is full of United
States Bonds. My fortune is in bonds.
I draw $OOO,OOO a year in gold as inter
est, and as I have no taxes to pay, ol
course we can enjoy all this style.
You see this first cage? That is a
farmer—one of our slaves. He is a
working tool of ours—a well meaning
man carried away by the negro gag,
ciazy on that subject, but entirely wil
ling to devote his Mays to labor to paj
taxes to support me in idleness. I pay
no taxes—he is willing to pay them all.
and to pay interest in gold on my pile
" What does his wife do ?"
Aii, my dear, she works hard—wash
es milk-pans, churns, rubs, scrubs,
patches and darns—sells eggs, butter,
chickens and turkeys to us to get a little
money to pay back to us as taxes.—
Sometimes she weeps and mournsover
her lot, but we must not hear her, my
The next cage contains a returned
soldier, a mechanic. He was a nice
man, went to war, fought, lost a leg.
came home and is now working to pay
taxes to support the government and to
pay us nabobs.
4 • Is that right ?"
Pshaw! my dear! Don't ask such fool
ish questions! Might maaes right,you
know! Hewa a poor fool, lie believed
all us Radicals said, and was so engaged
lighting for his country that hedid not
notice how nicely us good, loyal, stay
at-home Radicals, by the aid of our
loyal, speculating Congress, wound tin
bands about him. lie had a brother in
the army—killed on a raid for the cot
ton our cousin made so much mone\
from, you know. He is now working
to redeem his home from the mortgage
we put 011 while he was gone, and to
raise his portion of the $300,000,000 a
year in gold we bondholders demand a
You know poor men always work flic
best when they are in debt! That is
why a national debt is a national bless
ing ! Drive on slowly!
" Who is that poor woman f"
Oh, she is another one of our victims.
She had a husband, he went to war,
took a cold while on a raid for cotton,
mules and silver ware for the benefit ot
Curtis, Logan, Butler, Banks, and other
thieving Generals, and at last died in a
hospital. His wife, or his widow, is
now working to support the children.—
The government is rial good to her—
pays her a bounty—a few pence a day.
As us bondholders pay no taxes, and
it does not cost us one cent to support
the government, we are willing all the
women of America should hare bounties,
so long as they pay them themselves from
their own earnings and do not force us
protected bondholders to pay them.—
Let them have bounties—by all means
—and our interest is payable in gold!
Drive on, slowly !
" 117/0 is in dud cage 4 t
That, my dear, is a poor miner—he is
digging gold for us bondholders. Don't
disturb him—don't say anything till
we pass him, for the returns from Cali
fornia and Montana lead us to fear a
little trouble from such fellows.
But here is a cage, iny dear, which is
nice. You see those orphans at work?
They are our slaves—their fathers died
in battle, and us bondholders support
them. To be sure we don't pay for their
support, hut we levy taxes on the fann
ers, miners, mechanics, widows and
children of the country to support these
institutions. We mix up these things,
taking care to draw our interest in gold
and to sandwich our claims between
bounties and orphans, and so the wil
ling people of America toil oil! Ain't
it nice, my dear, to be smart, and run
this show t > suit a few of us bondhol
Never mind that cage, my dear!—
Driver, crack up the horses a little!—
Touch that off one a little on the flanks
with tlie whalebone !
That cage is full of fallen women, vic
tims of political preachers, members of
Congress, government officers,lecherous
old deacons and.others of the God and
morality party. They were once good
girls, good women, but they fell during
the war. But they pay taxes to support
us bondholders—they furnish amuse
ments for our manly sons—they add to
the revenue, and their cages are stills
which gather gold from infamy, and
that gold buys the laces you wear, my
dear ! Drive on, Jehu !
" What cage is (hat ?"
A very pretty one, my dear. Hold on,
driver. Don't you hear the music ol
machinery ? The victims are the fac
tory opera lives of New England—slaves
to wealth, toilers to support us. We
work them early an 1 late—pay them in
greenbacks, while our interest is paya
ble in gold. They work more hours
each day than ever did the slaves of the
South. They live poorer, and work
harder. We raise their wages once and
then lower theiri three times—they work
! at the sound of the whistle or tap of the
bell—march to their boarding houses in
long lines, likeconvicts, eat from board-
I ing house tables and make excellent
; slaves. If they knew their strength
| they would upset their cage, but the
. sturdy negro there with his rod, keeps
| them in very nicely.
It isa very nice show, my dear! And
now we will see the fun! The keeper
will, with Ids great steal hook, go a
round and draw out theserip they earn
ed while we have been looking at them,
and it will serve to buy wine and game
for our dinners, pianos for our house,
silks for you, and more Bonds for me!
Watch sharp, my dear 1 You see how
the poor victims act as the hook draws
out their earnings! Loan a little back,
for some of them have seen us and talk
Great God ! But that word makes me
Now we can watch them unobserv
See the farmer hold his aching back
as the hook draws out his earnings!
See the widow weep and look with
tearful eye upon her dying child as the
hook brings to us the little she lias
See the laborers rush to the drunk
ard's cup as their earnings are snatched
away! They say they might as well
spend their money for beer and whisky
as to support us bondholders, so we will
enact laws that they shall not spend
their money, but give it all to us!
Hurry up, Mr. Keeper—rake out all
you can—load my carriage and we'll be
off to drink the wine and enjoy the lux
uries us bondholders purchase with the
money hooked from the victims that
make up our show.
Kiss your fingers to the victims, my
dear! They work better if we notice
them a little Wave your embroidered
handkerchief to the cage we hastened
by that the inmates may see our style
and treat our sons with more attention.
Bub a littleot that imported cologne
over in y face—the sight of sweat on the
faces of our victims makes mine a little
sticky! Don't put your feet up so far
lor we arc aristocratic, now —protected
pets of Radicalism and must act dis
A lad from the ''Green Isle," whose
occupation is that of blacking stoves,
fire-places, and stove-pipes, bearing
upon his arm a pot of blacking,
with brushes and other implements of
his trade, addressed a denizen of the
city, who was standing at the door :
"Has your honor any stove to polish
this morning? I'm the boy fo~ that
business." The person addressed not
being of a courteous manner, gruffly an
swered: "G > about your business."—
Pat moved a few steps off, to be out of
the reach of a kick,anil replied: "Your
honor would not be worse for a little
polishing yourself, I'm thinking."
THE finest idea of a thunderstorm ex
tant is, when Wiggins came home tight.
Now, Wiggins is a teacher, and had
been to a temperance meeting, and
drank too m&ch lemonade, or some
thing. lie came into the room among
his wife and daughters, and just then
he tumbled over the cradle and fell
whop on the floor. After a while he
rose and said:
"Wife, are you hurt?"
"Girls, are you hurt?"
"Terribleclap, wasn't it?"
—The Chicago Tribune says that in
central and southern Illinois the small
streams are exhausted, the grass is
dried up anil cattle have to be driven
long distances to find water and pastur
age; and the same is true in lowa, Ne
braska and other States. If the win
ter sets in without heavy rains, there
will he great difficulty in keeping stock
—A schoolboy, at Northampton,
Massachusetts, had his arm broken in
three places, last Tuesday, by being
pushed from his scat by a comrade.
—Fitz Greene lialleck's last words
were, "hand me my pantaloons, M try,"
uldressed to his sister. She turned to
the other side of tiie room to get them,
and as she did so he expired.
—Nine of the government camels,
imported at a heavy expense a few
years ago, for beasts of burden, have
been sold to a menagerie.
—Tennessee owes $35,f>62,333, and has
not the means to pay it. Taxes are al
ready so high that they are driving
capital and business from the State.
—Owing to tne continued drought,
the farmers of Washington county,
Va., have not yet finished sowing
wheat, and some have not even finish
—The last valuation of property of
the State of Ohio is §1,140,00b,000, near
ly one-half enough to pay the national
—The upper portion of East Tennes
see is represented to be full of grain,
wheat and corn, waiting purchasers
and a rise in the rivers.
—A colored preacher claims one
thousand dollars damages for being e
jeeted irom the street ears at Terre
—The negroes in Georgia, aregrumb
ling since the election, because they
"don't see nothin ob de franchise what
was gwain to be gub us." They sus
pect their white managers for cheating
—The Illinois Central ltailroad Com
pany is said to he obliged to bring wa
ter for its engines to one of the water
stations a distance of fifty-four miles.
—A fellow has been arrested in Lon
don for acting as a trainer ol youthlul
thieves, it was shown that lie had a
school,and gave rcgular lessons in log ue