VOE.IWIIE
NEW SERIES,
THE BEDFORD GAZETTE
t s PUBLISHED EVERY FRIDAY MORNING
ISY MEYERS isc BENFORD,
At the following terms, to wit:
51.50 per annum, CASH, in advance.
$2.00 " " if paid within the year.
§2.50 " " it not paid within the year.
[Cp-No subscription taken for less than six months.
C3"No paper discontinued until alt arrearages are
paid,unless at the option of the publishers. It has
been decided by the United States Courts, that the
stoppage of a newspaper without the payment of ar
rearages, is prima facie- evidence ol lrand and is a
criminal offence.
[CF~The rouits have decided that persons are ac
countable for the subscription price of newspapers,
if they take them from the post office, whetherthe y
subscribe for them, or not.
POETRY.
THE BRIEFLESS BARRISTER.
A BALLAD.
•• \ 7
An Attorney was taking a turn,
In shabby habiliments dressed;
His coat, it was shockingly worn,
• And the rust had invested his vest.
His breeches had suffered a breach,
His linen and worsted were worse ;
lie had scarce a whole crown in iiis hat,
And not a half crown in his purse.
And thus as lie wandered along,
A cheerless and comfortless elf;
He sought for relief in a song,
Or complainingly talked to himself:
"Unfoilunate man that I am !
I've never a client but grief;
The case is, I've no case at all,
And in brief, I've ne'er had a briel .
I
"I've waited and waited in vain,
Expecting an 'opening' to find,
Where an honest young lawyer might gain
Some teward for the toil ol his mind.
* . .
'Tis not that I'm wanting in law,
Or lack an intelligent lace,
That others have cases to plead,
While I have to plead for a case.
"O, how can a modest young man
E'er hopa for the smal'est progression
The profession's already so lull
Ot lawyers so full ot profession."
While thus he was strolling around,
His eyes accidentally fell
On a deep, dark hole in the ground.
And he sighed to himself, '-It is well !"
To curb his emotions, he sat
On the curb-stone, the space ot a minute,
And cried, "Here's an opening at last
And in less than a juTy was in it !
Next morning twelve citizens came,
( ? Twas the coroner bade them attend,)
To the end that it might be determined
How the man had determined nis end!
"The mar. was a lawyer, I hear,"
Quoth the foreman who sat on the corse;
"A lawyer ? Alas!" said another,
"Undoub'edly died of remorse !"
A third said, "He knew the deceased,
An Attorney well versed in the laws,
And as to the cause ot his death,
'Twas no doubt from the want of a cause."
Thej -iry decided at length,
Alter solemnly weighing the matter,
"That the lawyer was drowned, because
He couldn't" keep his head above water !"
STATE FINANCES.
Some days ago we published a statement of
the receipts and expenditures of the State, du_
ring the fiscal year which closed on the 30th
day of November last. That statement con
tained some facts which require a more particu
lar notice, as they lurnish unmistakable evi
dence of improvement in the public finances,
and vigilance and energy in their management.
In 1856, when Mr. FRY (Democrat) came into
office, the amount received into the State Treasu
ry, from tax on real and personal estate, was,
in round numbers, $ 1,600,000, and the tax
assessed on such property was three mills on the
dollar of valuation. During the session of 1857,
the Legislature (Democratic) reduced this tax to
two anil one half mills on the dollar, and yet
we find the amount of money received into the
Treasury in ISSB, from this source, was over
$1,600,000 ; thus showing notwithstanding the
reduction of tax, that the amount received is
about the same.
The amount received by tax on store and
tavern licenses was, in 1856, $310,000, while
in 1858 it was $331,000, and this, too, in the
lace ola reduction in the rate of licenses, as fix
ed by an Act of Assembly, during the session
ol 1857.
The amount received by tax on corporation
stocks, in 1556, was $271,000, while in 1858
this amount increased to $4-08,000, making a
difference to the State of $13:7,000. Here let
us state, that the act of 1844- requires all insti
tutions and companies to pay annually, to the
Btate, a certain amount ol tax on their capital
stock, the dividends which they declare being
the measure of "such taxation, provided those
dividends reach six per cent ; if they do
then the stock is required to be. valued by the
company, and the tax is_assessed on such valua
tion. Last vear everv branch of industry in
the State was depressed and consequently many
companies, in fact nearly all, were unable to
declare dividends, and their stock necessarily
depreciated in value. These circumstances
caused a corresponding decrease in the amount i
of revenue to be derived by the State from this ;
source, yet the amount has increased $157,000; ;
How has this been ejected ? There were hun
dreds of companies in the State which made
no returns, and never paid one cent of
the required amount. These
through the persevering efforts of the Auditor
Genera], have all been compelled to settle and
adjust their accounts, and thus bear their share
of taxation.
The amount received as a bonus, required
to be paid by certain corporations, was, in IBf>6>
but $13,000, while in 1 Si>S, the amount
reached $97,000, making a difference in this
item alone ofsS4-,000.
There area number of other matters contain
ed in the statement to which we could refer }
but the above exhibits the gratifying fact that
there has been an increase of the receipts into
the public Treasury from the sources referred
to, of over three hundred and twelve thousand
dollars. The natural inquiry is, how has this
been brought about, when it is well known the
Legislature, in at least two of the items, caused
the tax to be materially reduced 1 It may lie
asserted that the increase of the receipts has
been caused by a corresponding increase in the
value of real ami personal property ; and also
an increase in the number of store 'tavern
licenses and corporations. A reference, howev
er, to the amount received from these sources
for years previous to 1856, will show this to
he oniv in part the cause. The increase has
been effected since the induction ol Mr. Fr.y
into office, and is to a consiJerable'extent owing
to his zealous and laborious efforts, to cause the
amounts due by individuals and corporations to
he paid into the Treasury at the time they are
due , and not by negligence and inattention post
pone their payment until the delay causes a
doubt to their justice.
It is in this way, and in this way only, the
people may reasonably hope for a relief from an
onerous public debt. By the annual statement
referred to, it appears that over four hundred
thousand dollars of the public debt has been
cancelled this year, after a full payment of all
demands upon the Treasury; therefore, we take
pleasure in thus calling public attention to facts
so gratifying, and we sincerely hope this will
go on until every vestige of our debt shall be
wiped out, and the people relieved from a bur
den which has long oppressed them.— Patriot
and Union.
A Calm Voice From Kansas.
We find in the New York Tribune , a letter
from Kansas, written by one who has no sympa
thy with the Democratic party, which for
once develops sound views and welcome truths.
It indicates that the people oi Kansas are begin
ning to appreciate their true condition, and
have sickened of the agitation that has done so
much to retard their prosperity. The admis
sion is important, that the effect of the much a
bused "English bill" has been to restore com
plete quiet and confidence to the Territory.—
The following is an extract from the letter re
ferred to :
"I venture to say that more has been done
for the organization of Kansas in the last four
months than we accomplished in the lour years
prior to this, and why ? Simply because we
have put to rest for a time, this abhorrent politi
cal fight. You may think the remark a strange
one, but it is true. From lh* moment tiie pas
sage of the "English bill" made clear our policv
and our duty, Kansas lias had peace, for our
course was as distinctly settled in our mind on
the day of its passage as it was on the night
ol the day of election. Home application is
beginning to show itself in every direction.—
Contentment and happiness are making their
impress on every countenance, and our industri
al econom)- will show greater developements
of the soil, and improvements in homes, than
have been shown for the whole period ol Kan
sas settlement.
"A word as to the future; Our friends at
th e East are urging that we now take prompt
action tor the future ; form a Constitution, and
demand immediate admission into the Onion.—
We thank them for their interest and their ad
vice, but we think the policy a bad one for the
oresent. Had we not better leave the question
of assuming the responsibilities of a Slate until
the people are ready for it 1 I know what I
say when I tell you that the people are not
ready lor this step. Why 1 First, they are
not prepared to sustain the burdens of
Government. Second, they are tired of poli
tics, Political Conventions, Constitutions, politi
cal quacks, hacks and mountebanks. They
desire rest and opportunity to improve their
homes, cultivate their farms, and get in a state of
independency. Our hope and prayer will be
given to the President to send ns as good a
Governor as the last, and one that will follow
his policy, and that our friends will allow us to
BEDFORD, PA., FRIDAY MORNING, DECEMBER 24,1858.
act for ourselves—pledging them that Kan
sas shall be when admitted a State, one that
shall not dishonor the free sisterhood.
"We hope still further, that the men willjre
few and far between who will look to Kansas
to make or mend their political fortunes. —
From the beginning stie has been tormented
with too many of this class."
The Origin of Pickwick.
Mr. Dickens has lately been issuing what
iscalled a'popular edition ot his works, in
which he treats us to this little account of the
origin of Pickwick :
"I was a young man of three-arul-twenty,
when the present publishers, attracted by some
pieces! was at that time writing in the Mor
ning Chronicle newspaper, waited upon me,
to propose a something that should be published
in shining numbers—then only known,..to me,
|or I believe to anv body else, by a dim recol
| lect ion of certain interminable novels in that
I form, which used to be carried about tbe-coun
try by pedlars, and over some of which I re
member to have shed innumerable teats, before
1 bad served my apprenticeship to life.
"When I opened my door in Furnival'* Inn,
to the managing partner who represented the
firm, I recognized in him the person from whose
bands I had bought, two or three years previ
ously, and whom 1 had never seen before or
since, my first copy of the magazine in which
my first effusion—dropped stealthily one even
ing at twilight, with lear and tiembung, into a
dark letter box, in a dark ofiice, up a daik
court in Fleet street—appeared in all the glory
of print, on which memorable occasion hors
well I recollect it !—I walked down to West
minster Hal! and turned into it for half an
hour, because rny eyes were so dimmed with
joy and pride that they could not bear the
and were not fit to be seen there.
"''The idea propounded to ir.e was that the j
monthly something should be a vehicle for cer- j
tain plates to be executed by Mr. Seymour;
and there was a notion liiat a 'Nimrod Club,' j
the members of which were to go out shooting,
See., and getting themselves into difficulties 1
through their want of dexterity, would be'
the best means of introducing these. I object
ed, on consideration, that 1 should like to takes
my own way, with a freer range of English
scenes and people, and was afraid I should ul
timately do so in any case, whatever course I
might prescribe to myself at starting. My
views being deferred to, f thought of Mr. Pick
wick, ana wrote the first number. 1 connect
ed Mr. Pickwick with 'a club because oI the
original suggestion, and I put in Mr. Winkle
expressly for the use of Mr. Seymour. My
friends told me it wa* a law, cheap form of
publication, by which I should ruin all my ri
sing hopes; and how right my friends turned
out to be, every body now knows.
"'Boz,'appended to the monthly cover o!
i this book, and retained long afterward, was the
1 . . „ •• i
i nickname of a pet child, a younger brother,
whom I had dubbed Moses, in honor of the vi
| car of Wakefield, which being facetiously pro
| nounced through the nose, became Boses, and
| being shortened became Boz. 'Boz' was a
j very favorite household word to me iong before
! I was an author, and so I came to adopt it."
A Hard Joke.
The Mobile Jldvertiser , of the 10th ultimo
tells tlie following good story of a notorious
practical joker in tnat city, yclept "Straight
Back Dick :"
Dick was at the wharf one day last week,
when one of the up-river boats arrived, looking,
doubtless, for some unwary individual upon
whom to exercise his talent, lie watched
closely the countenance of each passenger as he
stepped from the plank upon the wharf, and at
length fastened his gaze upon an individual
who, from his appearance ancl manners, was
considerably nearer Mobile than he had ever
been before. He was evidently ill at ease, ancl
had probably heard the reports which were rife
in the country relative to the hundreds who
were dying in Mobile every bour from yellow
fever. The man staited o/F toward Dauphin
street, carpet sack in hand; but had not pro
ceeded far when a heavy hand was laid unon
his shoulder, and he suddenly sto, ped. Upon
turning around he met the cold, serious counte
nance of Dick, and it seemed to send a thrill ol
terror throughout his whole lrame. After look
ing at him steadrh- for about a minute, Dick
slowly ejaculated :
"Yes, yon are the man. Stand straight!"
With fear visible in his countenance, the
! poor fellow essayed to do as commanded.
"Straighter yet !" said Dick. "There, that
will do," and taking from his pocket a small
tape measure, lie stooped down and measured
; him from the toe of his boot to the crow n of
his hat, took a pencil and carefully noted the
height in his pocket-book, to the utter amaze
ment of the stranger; after which he mcastiied
i him across the shoulders, and again wrote down
Freedom of Thought and Opinion.
| the dimensions. He then looked the stranger
; firmly in the face and said :
' "Sir, lam very sorry that it is so, but I real
i ly will not be able to finish it lor you before
morning."
"Finish what ?" asked the stranger, endea
voring in vain to appear calm.
"Why, your coffin, to be sure! You see, 1
! am the city undertaker, and the people are dy
-1 ing here so fast that I can hardly supply the de
invtid lor coffins. You will have to wait until
your turn comes, which will be to-morrow mor
"niag—say about 9 o'clock."
"Hut what the d— Ido / want with a coffin ?
T have no idea of dying !"
"You haven't, eh ? Sir, you will not live
two hours and a half. I see it in your counte
nance. Why, even now, you have a pain a
slight pain—in your back."
"Y-yes, 1 believe I h-have," replied the trem
bling hoosier.
"Exactly," said Dick, "and in your limbs,
too!"
"Y.-s, stranger, you're right anil I begin to
feel it in the back of my neck and head."
"Of course you do, and unless you do some
thing for it, you'll be dead in a short time I as
sure you. Take my advice, now, go back a
board the boat, swallow down a gill of brandy,
get into your stateroom and cover up with blan- ,
kets. Stay there till you perspire freely, then
leave here like lightuing!"
Hoosier hurried on board the boat, and fol
lowed Dick's instructions to the letter. On
Monday he was met by a gentleman at Citron
elle. to whom he related his wonderful escape
from death by yellow fever, even [after prepa
rations were being made to procure his coffin.
He says he will never forget the kindness of
the tall man in Mobile who gave him such good
advice. 1
How wo Perspire.
AII over the surface ot our bodies there are
scattered millions of minute orifices which open
into the delicate convoluted tubes lying under
neath the skin, and are called by anatomists
.sudoriferous glands. Each ol these tubes,
when straightened, measures about a quaiter of
an inch; and as according to Erasmus Wilson,
whose figures we follow, there are 3528 of
these tu'es on every square inch of the palm of
til? hand, there must be no less than 882 inch
es of tubing on such a square inch. In some
parts of the body the number of tubes is even
greater; in most parts it is less. Erasmus Wil
son estimates that there are 2800 on every
square inch, on the average; and as the total
number of such inches is 2500, we arrive at
the astounding result that, spread over the sur
face of the body, there are not less than twenly
eight miles of tubing , by means of which li
quids may he secreted, and given off as vapor
in insensible perspiration, or as water in sen
sible perspiration. In the ordinary circum
stances of daily life, the amount of fluid which
is thus given of! from the skin (and lungs) du
ring the twenty-four hours, varies from 14 lbs.
to 5 lbs., under extraordinary circumstances the
amount will of course rise enormously. Dr.
Southwood Smith found that the workmen in
the gas-works employed in making up the fires,
and other occupations which subjected them to
o-ieat heat, lost on an average 3 lb. G oz. in
forty-five minutes; and when working for sev
enty minutes in an unusually hot 'place, their
loss was -I lb. 2 oz., anJ I lb. I t oz.—BTack
u-ood.
AVho Makes Free Stales.
During the last session of Congress, Minne
sota, a free State, was admitted into the Union,
upon the recommendation of President Buchan
an. On looking over the vote upon the ad
mission, it will be seen that every Democrat a
like from the South and North, was in his seat,
and voted "aye," while a majority of the Re
publicans voted "no." The Senate, which is
largely Democratic, passed a bill to admit Ore
gon, another free Stale, in opposition to the
votes and exertions ol many Republican Sena
tors. Democracy knows no difference between
the North and South. The leaders of the Re
publican pafty claim to be great friends of
freedom, but their actions prove that they are
hypocritical in their professions. Bri'lgeport
Farmer.
Cheating the Printer.
The other day we saw several Irish laborers
trying to decipher a written notice headed 'Pub
lic Sale:' the notice, although written tolerably
plain, could not be read by the Emoralders, and
thev requested us to read it for them, which
we of course did. At the conclusion one of
them turned to his comrades, and remarked, in
a very impressive tone :
'Well, be jabere, I'll never buy of a man
who's so nagardly that he won't get his adver
tisements printed; he's chated the printer and
he'd chale me.' They all acquiesced in lus
decision.—Ex.
A COMICAL SCENE WITH AN AFRICAN LADV I
AT CHARLESTON. —Various amusing anecdotes
are related ot the poor Afiicans who were res
cued from the slaver Echo, by the U. Slates
brig Dolphin, during their brief sojourn in the
port of Charleston. The following is said to
have been a most comical scene :
! Among the Echo's living cargo, every one
of whom, be it remembered, were iu the con
dition in which they entered the world, and
under no obligation to tbe tailors or mautuama
kers' art, was a woman who was distinguished
! from the rest by her evident natural brightness
and superior looks. Moreover, she was dressed*
not, probably, after tbe fashion of our Ilroadway
belles, but dressed differently from her compan
ions, nevertheless ; and like all true women, in
such a condition, she felt and evinced her
superiority. She actually had on a pair of
gloves, which she wore at all hours, with
evident pride in her costume, and telt that
she was in "full tags." She was called, pur
excellence , "the Queen," and her story getting
abroad it Charleston, some ladies requested and
obtained permission tor her to visit them. A
loose dress was accordingly furnished her, to
cover her other deficiencies of the article of clo
thing, and she was landed from one ol the boats
and conveyed to the house ot a prominent resi
dent of Charleston. There, the servant wa s
ordered to dress the queen in hoops, broad en
ough for a dame of uppertendom, and a fiaun
ting, gay dress. She was much astonished and
pleased with the dress, but more with the hoops ?
which she would endeavor to catch as she tur
ned round and round, uttering outlandish cries.
She also exhibited some inclination constantly
to examine more closely into the material be
neath her outer dress, but as gentlemen were
present, she was prudently prevented from
gratifying this natural curiosity. Alter spen
ding some hours ashore, she was conveyed to the
beach by a number of her entertainers.
Tiie boat could not reach high water maik
and lav some distance out in the water. Ihe
Queen shook hands all around wi'.ll her fj iend s
and then going to the water's edge, surveyed
the boat for an instant, and after waving a la*f
adieu, suddenly hoisted dress, hoops, under
clothes and all, like a huge sun bonnet over
her head, and quietly waded out to the boat.
This reversal of the purpose of clothing staitled
the spectators, and there was a most sudden
and laughable iush from the beach.
was brought before a country
squire for stealing a hog, and three witnesses
being examined swore that the} - saw him steal it.
A wag having volunteered as counsel (or Josh,
knowing the scope of the squire's brain, arose
and addressed him as follows : "May it please
your honor, I can establish this man's honesty
beyond the shadow of a doubt ; lor I have
twelve witnesses ready to swear that they did
not see him steal it." The squire rested his
head for a few moments upon his hands, as if
in deep thought, and then with great dignity,
arose, and brushing back his hair, said : "if
there are twelve who did not see him steal it
and only three that did, T discharge the prison
er. Clear the room !"
TITLES.— A lieutenant in the service, by the
name of Broom, was advanced to a captaincy,
and naturally addressed as Capt. Broom. One
of his friends persisted in calling him plain
Broom, much to his annoyance, and one day,
having done so lor the fortieth time, Broom
said :
'You will please remember, sir, that I have a
handle to my name.'
'Ah !' said his tormentor, 'so yuu have—
well, Broom-handle, how are you?'
DYING ITSELF.—Harry H., ol Providence,
tells a good story of a young man who had a
light and incipient moustache. One da}',
fingering the few hairs, hj said to Harry :
"Had'nt I better dye this moustache ?" "Oh
no," replied Harrv, "let it alone end it will
die itsell."
DULL TOOLS.—Said one Student to another,
whom he caughl swinging a scythe most lusti
ly in a field of stout grass, 'Frank, who makes
you work for a living ' A fellow with your
"talent and ability should not be caught engaged
,in hard labor. I mean to get my living by my
wits.'
'Well, Bill, you can work with duller tools
better than I can,' was the reply.
A doctor returned a coat to a tailor because
it did not fit him. The tailor seeing the doctor
at the funeral ol one of his patients, said :
"Ah, doctor, you're a happy man."
: "Why so?" said the doctor.
"Because," replied the tailor, "you never
have any ol your bad work returned on your
hands."
A new stove has be> n invented lor the com
fort ol travellers; it is to be put under the feet,
with a mustard-plaster on the head, which
• draws the heat througlt the whole system.
A Yankee editor out west says : "The march
of civilization is onward —onward liketh , slow
: but intrepid step of a jackass to a peck of oats!"
Whv had a man Utier lo e hi-, aim than a
l.g ? 'Because losing lus leg, he loses something
"to boot.
IVIIOIJ: \1 flllCEt '.Nriy.
Lalcr from Kansas— Tprnlurial Mass
louvtufioo.
ST LOUIS, Dec. 17th.—Leavenwoi 111 dates to
the 6th inst., per U. S. Express la Booneville,
furnish advices from Kansas.
A Territorial Mass Convention of the con
servative element assembled at Leavenworth on
the 25ih, nit., fir Ihe purpose of organizing an
opposition to the Republicans. The attendance
was numerous, though only six counties were
represented. A thorough re-union and re
organization of the Democracy was advocated
and hotly debated, a strong minority characteri
zing such action as premature. A series of res
olutions; petitioning Congress fir liberal land
grants for public improvements, denouncing the
Republican party, and in favor of the expulsion
of free negroes from the future State of Kansas,
declaring the slave question a dead issue, ad
vocating the opening of the Indian Reserves to
settlers, and a modification of the pre-emption
laws, was finally adopted, with a preamble
determining upon an immediate organization of
the Democracy. The session was prolonged to
a late hour, and was rather turbulent. Both
wings of the parly were well represented, and
the discussion maintained with vigor. Able
speeches were made on both sides.
COL. SAMUEL \V. BLACK SHOT. —We learn,
hv a private letter from .Nebraska,that Col. S.
IV. Black, one of the Supreme Judges of that
Territory, was dangerously wounded with a gun
in the hands of a friend, a few days since. It
appears that, accompanied by another gentle
man, he was out hunting or? the prairie, and
passing into a clump of bushes, with a view ot
driving some prairie hens from their cover, his
comrade, wfio did not observe his presence, dis
charged his gun twice in succession, the first
load a heavy charge of buckshot—taking effect
in the head, and the second in the arm, inflict
ing two severe, though, we are happy to statp,
not dangerous wounds. At last accounts the
Colonel was rapidly recovering, and his speedy
return to convalescence Was confidently looked
for. The gentleman's escape was a most for
tunate one, as both charges were very heavy,
and but a shoit distance separated the parties
when the gun was discharged. His numerous
friends here, while deploring the accident, will
be rejoiced to learn that it is not likely to beat
tended with any serious result.— PHtabtrru;
Chronicle.
LATE ELECTION' IN ILLINOIS. —As it lias been
contended that the Republicans were in a majori
ty, and that Mr. DOUGLAS' re-election to the
Senate will have been secnred only by a cun
ning gerymanderingof the State in the matter
of the election districts, it is worth while to
examine these returns. The total vote through
out the State for Superintendent of Public
Instruction is 252,142, which isslightly larger
than the vote for State Treasurer. This aggre
gate is distributed among the candidates thus ;
Republican. Democratic.
Bateman, 124,556. French, (Doug.) 122,412.
Reynolds, (A. D.) 5,173.
127,580.
Deduct Republican vote 12J,55(j.
Democratic plurality 3,030.
The above is, we imagine, for all who can
cypher, a satisfactory refutation of the misstate
ment that the Republicans had the majority in
Imnois ; or that Mr. DOUGLAS will continue to
serve that State as Sena'or in the face of such a
majority.— St. Louis Republican.
LANDLORD —"Mr. Editor, I'll thank you to
say I keep the best table in the city." Editor
—"I'll thank you to supply my family with
board gratis.' Landlord—l thought you were
glad to get something to fill up your paper."
Editor—"l thought you were glad to feed men
for nothing. It's a poor rule that won't work
both ways." Exit landlord in a rage.
"Do you believe in second love, Misthpr iVIc-
Quode?"
"Do I believe in second love? Humph ! It
a man buys a pound of sugar, isn't it swate? and
when it is gone, don't he want another pound
and isn't that swate too 1 Troth, Murphy, I
believe in second love 1"
"MY dearest Maria," wrote a quiet affection
ate husband to his wife, a strong-minded woman.
She wrote him back, "Deaiest, let me correct
either your grammar or morals. You address
me, "My dearest Maria." Am I to suppose
yon have other "dear Marias ?"
A placard in the window of a patent medi
cine vender in the Rue Saint Honore, Paris,
reads as follows :
"The public are requested not to mistake
this shop lor that of another quack just oppo
site."
'However you may sneer , says \ed, 'un
friend's no fool—he has a head.' 'True,' savs
the other with a grin. 'He lias a head—so lias
a pin."
"i'ompey, what am it dat goes when de wag
on goes, stops when de wagon slops, it am no
use to de wagon, and yet de wagon can't go
widout it ?" "I gubs dat up Clem." "Why
' de noise ob course."
Everything has its use. Were it not for the
flies, people in summer would sleep two hours
longer than they do, and thus lose the test part
of the day—the portion demoted to sunrise and
meadow larks.
T know I ain a perfect bea- in my manners,'
said a tine young farmer to his sweet heart.
'No indeed you are not, John, you have nev
er hugged me yet, you are more sheep than
bear.'
Woikas though thou wcrt to live foievn
worship as though tliou wvit todie presently.
VOL -2, NO. 21.