VOU TIE 53. NEW SERIES THE BEDFORD GAZETTE l*> PUBLISHED EVERY FRIDAY MORNING BY MEYERS & BEN FORD. At the following terms, to wit: een decided by the United States Courts, that the stoppage of a newspaper without the payment of ar rearages, is prima facie evidence ot fraud and is a criminal offence. comts have decided that persons are ac countable for the subscription price of newspapers, if they take them from the post office, whetherthe y subscribe for them, or not. .-timnier —but tire leaves are sere. The hoaiv hairs of aged year:— "Vet beau'y— tho' in other guise; For beauty changes, never dies; — Delights us still with charms anew— V ariety of glorious hue ; And gives to earth the lovely dyes, i'hat make the rain-bow ot the skies' O earth ! whv unto thee were given The beauty and the light of heaven 1 That man should mar, with deeds of ill. The loveliness, whieh is so, still; That be—an insect on thy breast— Fhoald make thee cursed, when thou art And soil the green of thy lair plains [blessed. With murder's lark and gory stains ; And trace his path w :h sorrow's blight Leave ruin where he lottnd delight, And turn thee to a home of death— 'l hou that sustain'st Ms fleeting breath! iw\v TO EAT. We have long considered eating an impor tant [ art of our daily pleasure arid duty. I here are rules to b- obsei ved, which physiologically considered, are intimately connected with health and lite, and h nee, with our success and char acter. We should eat at regular times, eat wholesome food, eat slowly, masticate well, he cfceerful while we eat, drink but little while eating, eat to live and not to kill ourselves. but the thought on our mind just now , is relatively to the proprieties ol the table. 1 here are many little courtesies and refinements n inong well-bred people at the table, which many regaid with indifference, that just now seem to us pai ticulai ly appropriate and becom ing. We say just now, oecause we had occa sion a few days since, to feed some Indians, fresh from the forest. Their manner of eating was so hoggish, greedy, gonnandish, as to be absolutely repulsive, not to say loathsome.— That human beings could eat so like brutes, we had not before dreamed. We had heard before . I "bolting lood," "roughing it," "taking it the natural way," &c., but we bad no real concep tion of the coarseness and brutality of savage eat ing. We saw then the beauty of the icfine ■merits ol the civilized table, as we had never seen it before. We palized sensibly the im- port a nee of cultivating a chaste and proper; manner of eating, a refinement of table etiquette j ♦hat shall be at once graceful and agreeable. There are lew places in which one's breed- ! iter shows i'sell more cleatlv than at the table, j A low bred man will generally be ill-.i.aoDcred > and coarse at the table. A selfish man will j usnallv show his selfishness as soon at the fes- 1 tal board as elsewhere. An awkward man will ; be sure to be doubly awkward at the table.— [ \ bashlul man is most bashful when fie eats in , company of others. A mean man will be es pecially m'an at bis own table. <>n the con- ; t'arv a gentleman is especially a gentleman at I (■is meats. The generous here shows his gen erosity; the polite man his politeness; the well bred man his good manners; the graceful man hi? polish; the dignified man his digrvty. With the American people, table etiquette is too much neglected. More attention to good manners to a graceful and easy style of eating, to table politeness anil courtesy, would do much to polish our people, and make their common behavior more agreeable and satisfactory to them selves. Our example and instruction before our children arrPimporfant to them. There is such a thing as excessive politeness, as an exqui site mannerism at the table, which is to be a voided, but we are more likely to offend with our coarseness. obliges not to mistrust a man; prudence no', to trust him before we know him. POLITICA L. . , From the New York Journal of Commerce, Oct. oth. LETTER FROM GOVERNOR DENVER. I he New York Tribune having published an ' article on Kansas affairs, September '2O, which ; contained several gross misstatements as to the j "action of Governor Denver and President Bu j chanan, the Governor addressed the following ; courteous I 'tier to the editor of the 'Tribune correcting sti errors, but it had not the fairness to print it. I mffr these circumstan j ces, the gentleman to whom it was sent for transmission to the / ribune, has handed it to us. ! and we cheerfully lay it before our readers : LECOMPTOX, K. T., Sept. 30, 1858. | To the Editors of the .\\w York Tribune. GENTLEMAN : .My attention has been called j to an article in reference to Kansas affairs pub i lished in your daiiv of the 20th irislant, and | I ri-weekly of (he 21st, in which you suggest ; that I bad probably been compelled by the i ; Administialion to resign the post I have held ; j here for some months past, and on that supposi j Don you proceed to make some serious charges j against .Mr. Buchanan and his Administration, 1 I for all of which there is not the slightest founda- . lion. It is true that I have resigned the oiiice ! |of (Governor of Kansas, but it was an act of my j own free will. The President desired me to re- ' main, but the condition of my private affairs I would not permit me to do so longer. Ju June last i sent up mv resignation to take eff ct in j August, but while in Washington in July, a; , the urgent solicitations of many persons iuteres- | ted in Kansas, and also at lite request of the' President, I then withdrew it for the time being. j Those who are conversant with the facts know ' that it har been with extreme reluctance thai I I have remained here fiom the fust, and that I have always declared my intention to resign ' tile otiice of Governor, as soon as it could be j done with safety to the public interests. I have : received the most ample assurance of (tie cordial : approval of my course in this !IW--iar Oioinet, j, and here I inn>t be permitted to say that in all | i mv conversation with the President about Kan- j sas affairs, he has always manifested the deepest ! i concern for the peace and happiness of the coun- j try, and a determination that the people of the j Territory should have 3 fair opportunity at the : ballot box, to settle questions at is?ue before [ them in their own way, and without any ex- j traneous influences. Such has been the charac- : ter of all his communications to me, whether' verbal or written, and while endeavoring to j carry them out in good laith, I have met with no opposition from the moderate men of the , Territory, nor from those who have been classed . as proslavory rr.cn. The frauds perpetrated al the election in [ January last, were committed by the violent j j and unscrupulous men of all parties, and the; investigation of tin ;n was partisan and partial. , | Such acts as the forging of the returns from!, Delaware Crossing were paraded before tbe public with great gusto, while the destruction! of the ballot box and the ballots al Sugn ftl >urid, by Capt. Montgomery, was passed by in silence, i The actors iu ail these transactions ought to | have been severely punished, but there were no j laws that would reach them, and the late Legisla- j tive A*mblv, which was all Free State, made; no sufficient jaws to meet such cas.- sin tlie fu- ; ttire, but endeavored to paralyze the powers of j ihe Circuit Courts and invest the Probate Courts ; with powers they could not pxercise. Vou ad- , ! mit that tilings have goneon here quietly under J my administration. This is not exactly correct, j ! There have been some disturbances in Doniphan, Leavenworth, Linn and Bourbon count its, and ; j in every case the disturbances have been produ- j iced by persons calling themselves Free State | men. In Doniphan county an effort was made j IO assassinate the gentlemen who weie eh fled j to the Legislature on the first Monday in Janua iry last, and, although they escaped with their i lives, they were plundered of their property, ! aud their houses burned. No steps have been ' taken to punish the perpetrators, and yet all the icountv officers were Free State men. The I troubles in Leavenworth city continued neatly ! all winter, and if the mayor, and other city offi j cersclid not encourage them, they certainly took ino measures to have them suppressed. In Linn ! and Bourbon counties ail was quiet ur.til ' Montgomery and his band commenced plunder i ing, and driving off the people who differed with them in political sentiments, in the course of which they committed some outrageous acts, ! one of which was to drive a farmer awav from his home, on pain of death, and then to take the i ladies of his family, strip off'all their clothing, and in that condition compel them to walk backwards and forwards'for their amusement. I passed through the counties where these outra ges were perpetrated, and fo r some 30 miles it presented such a scene of desolation as I never I expected to have seen, and hope never again to see in a country inhabited by American citi j ' zens. Is it any wonder that the people on i ! whom such outrages were perpetrated, should - become exasperated Some three hundred fami- i lies were thus robbed of their property, driven i awav Irom their homes, and compelled to fly - from the Territory. About two-thirds of them - from Linn county, where every local officer i ' was and is a Free State man, after providing j places of security foi their families, some of the men, maddened and desperate wpth the treat ; ! ment they had received, returned to seek re . I venge, and perpetrated the bloody and unjustifia- BEDFORD, PA., FRIDAY MOKNG, OCTOBER 29, 1858. | ble act of the Mara is des Cygoes. This was | followed on the part ol Montgomery, by setting j fire to the town of Foil Scott, in the middle of the night, while the people were all asleep: . and then pouring in volleys of rifle balls to pre ) vent the people from extinguishing the flames. Although no serious consequences resulted from , this act though several persons escaped very narrowly, yet its conception, I know of nothing worse in the whole ii'sto-y of Kansas. If such j an act had been commii'ed by a band of hostile • Indians, it would have serrt a thrill ot horror j throughout the whole country. Such have j been some of the troubles in th.s Territory, and I yet the perpetrators are running at large with | out an effort to arrest them, in counties where the Free State men have all the local officers, : upheld by a portion of those calling them."' 'ves 1 Free Slate rr.cn, among the most active of | whom havp been the hired reporters of the , Eastern newspaper press. If any further distur | ban ces occur in this Territory, these arp the | people who will b* justly responsible for if.— i The Free State party have a majority in every county in the Territory, and tbev have the i sheiifl and all other local officers in all but two I or throe ol the counties, and there is no county ; in which the sheriffcannot preserve peace if he desires In do so. You make another complaint against the President, that he has twice postponed the sites of I lie public lands. If I mistake not, last Spring you complained because the sales were ordered for July. The first postponement was made at the urgent solicitation of tbe people in all parts of the Territory, and so anxious were they to have it done, that they sent on a committee of three to see the President on the : subject, and the result of their interview was published by you. The second postponement was more necessary than the first, for money had become more scarce in the Territory, lli'e : rates of interest had gone up to 5 and 10 per cent, per month, and there was a good deal of sic. ss throughout the whole country. Be adhering to the second order for the sales to take place iu November, tbe settler would be j4aced at the mercy oi the money lender, when to postpone it the settler would have another yt m within which toobtain Hie means to secure a home, without having to give one-half of his land lor the money with which to enter (he ! other bail. No good government would know ingly impose such terms on her citizens, and hence the second postponement of the land sales j until July next. It was a measure demanded ' by the condi/inr, r.i'.,(i.:... i> —i. i I iv'eie determined to be dissatisfied wit!?trnvunrcg Hid everything tr.e Administration might do, j ind a few money-lenders whose percentage has j aeen gi.atlv reduced by it. By giving publicity to this, you w ill correct some erroneous impressions conveyed in th irticb- alluded to, and oblige yours, respectfully, I J. W. DENVER. j .3 B L.ICK REPUBLIC.!. V. Moses Perkins was a man who had no syn.- j pathy fbi lhe "suffering Africans," and didn't I like to hear anything about the abolition oi sla- '< J . . . . I very. IF- didn't think the "suffering African s i troubles were anything to him, and was not | disposed to bottler about them. He bad a broth- j er-in-law who was of a different stupe, and hero is told the way he served liin : "I had a brother-in-law," said Mose, "who j was one of the raveiiist, maddes', reddest, hottest ; Abolitionists vou ever seed. 1 liked the pesky ; critter well enough, and should have been very j glad to see him come and spend a day, fetching ; my sister to see itie and my wile, it he hadn't j "low ed his tongue to run so 'bout niggeis and j slavery,and the equality of tile races, and the | duty ot overflowing the Constitution of the I -i rnted Slates, and a lot of other things, some of j which made me ma t, arid the best part ol "em i right sick. 1 puzzled mv brains a good deal to think how I could make him shut up his noi- j sy head "bout Abolitionism. "Well, one time, when brother-inlaw came j over to stay, an idea struck me. J hired a nig- j ger to help me through tiie haying time. He j was the biggest, strongest, greasiest nigger 1 ever seed. Black ! tie was blacker than a stack ot black cats, and just as shi ney as a new bea ver bat. I spoke to him." "Jake," sez I, 'when von hear the breakfast bell ring, don't say a word, but you come into! the parlor and set right down among the fulki and at your breakfast.' The nigger's eyes stuck out ot his head 'bou a leet. 'You're jokin", n assa,' sez he. 'Jokin,' sez 1, 'l'm sober as a decon.' 'But,' sez he, '1 shau't have time to wash my self and change my shirt.' 'So much Die better,' sez I. 'Well breakfast came on, so did Jake, and IH sat down 'long side my brother-in-law.' Ht started, but he didn't say a word. There warn'! no mistake'bout it. Shut ycur eyes and yoi would know it for he was loud I tell you.— There was a first rate chance to talk Abolition ism, but my brother-in-law never opened trii i mouth. 'Jake,' says If you be on hand at dinner time ! and he was. He had been working ill th' ! mediffr all the forenoon—it was hot as hickory | aiul billti' pitch, and—but I will leave the res |to your imagination. Wall, in the alteruooi brother-in-law came up to me madder than i j short-tailed bull in boniet time. 'Moses,' sez he, '1 want to speak to you.' 'Sing it out,' sez I. 'I haven't but a few words to say,' sez liq 'but it that ere confounded nigger comes to tin ta'de while I'm stoppiu' here, I'll clear out.' 'Jake ate his supper that night in the kitchir, | but Irom that day to this I never heard m' brother-in-law open his mouth about Abolition ism. When the fugitive slave bill was passed ■ j I thought he'd let out some, but he didn't fit | he knowed that Jake was still w-orking on tfr ■ i farm.' Freedom of Thougland Opinion. i THRILLLVG IJfCIDEJVT. t Oiriday last, a man named Wilson made an esnsion from the Fair ground at Centralis, 111., a balloon, belonging to Brooks, the .Groat. He descended about eighteen miles dista, at the farm of Mr. Harvey. After the grajJng iron had been made fast, Harvey, to aniu his children, one a boy of four years, and the her a girl of eight years, placed them in . theisket car, and permitted them to ascend sevi! times as high as the rope would allow. Unpectedly the grappling iron slipped from thejther's hand, and the balloon with its pre cioofreight was wafted out of sight. Thedis tre.ofthe parent knew no bounds. The per | iloh is children he considered imminent, for uftt assurance had he that they would not be \ : Ime into some dense forest, where they would { overtaken with hunger before they could be find, or perhaps descend into some lake or stall and be drowned ? As soon as it was |S3ioie an Extra was issued at Centralia, and fe whuff neighboring country placed on the art to waf h tor the balloon and children. | .xaturdav morning at day break, a farmer ! air New Cartage, forty-three miles distant > fro* Mr. Harvey's place, discovered the bal ! 100 suspended in the air, attached by thegrap ! plig rope to a tree io h? yard. He linme- I lively hauled the balloon down, and found the j vungest child asleep in the {rottom of the bas ! kt, and the eldest carelully waiching ovei her . tille brother. They had been walD'd a!>out by j dferent cut rents of air throughout the whole fight, and had come to a halt but a little while j blore they were relieved. Tiie story the gii I told was that, as the bal lon ascended she cried piteouslv to her father tcpull it down. She said siie passed over a kirn where she saw a great many people to vhom she Ilk, wise appealed at the top of h r voi- e. Thi< place was Centralia. The bal loon was seen to pass over there, but the peo ple little imagined it carried two persons in sicti danger. Her little brother cried with ciid, and the heroic girl took off her aprcn, covered him and got him to sleep. In hand dug the ropes she happened to pull one which had the effect of biinging the balloon down, ■ind although not aiudeistanding the philosophy of the movement, she was content to keep the valve open, so long as by so doing, she found •she approached the earth. The young serial voyagers were in the bal loon about tint teen hours and a quarter. It may xAi'.'Agih imagined that among the neighbors mind and loving consi"deral , iSrf l!^ cls ol much may well entitle hei to ... ;y--AAce ot the incident itself \va s of.such acter that we opine it will not aoonm<' lor £otten in that section. The boy and girl were conveyed home as soon as practicable, and it is needless to say were received with outstretched arms. IIYM.Y OF THE M.JRSEILL. lISE. i'ijc Marseillaise was inspire".! hv genius, pa- j tiiotisin, youth, beauty and champagne. Roll get de Lisle was an officer of the garrison at Stra.sburg, and a native of Mount Jura, lie was an unknown poet and composer. He had a pleasant friend, named Dietrick, whose wile and daughters were the only critics and admi rers of tbe soidier poet's song. One night he , was at supper with his friend's family, and they bail onlv coarse bread and a few slices of ham. Dietrick, looking sorrow fully at De Lisle, said, "Plenty is not our i ast, but we have the cour age of a soldier's heart I have still one bottle left in the cellar—bring it, my daughter, and let us drink to liberty and our country !" The young gii l brought the bottle; it was soon exhausted, and De Lisle went staggering to bed ; lie could not sleep for cold, but his heart was warm and full ofliie beating of genius and i patriotism. He took a small clavicord and tried to compose a song : sometimes the woids j were composed fiist—sometimes tfie air. Di rectly he fell asleep over the instrument, and waking al daylight, he wrote down what he had conceived in the delirium ot the night.— | Then he woke the family, and sang his produc tion; at first the women turned pale, then they j wept, then burst forth into a cry of enthusiasm. It w as the song of the nation and of terror. Two months afterwards, Dietrick went to i the scaffold, listening to the sell same music, compos-d under his own rool and by the inspi- , iat ion of his last Lottie ot wine. Ihe people, sang it everywhere; it flew Irom city to city, to every public oi chest ra. Marseilles adopted the song at the opening and close of its clubs —hence the name. "Hymn ot the Marseil laise;" then it spread all over France. They sung it in their houses, in public assemblies, and in tbe stormy street convocations. De Lisle's mother heard it and said to her son, " M fiat is this revolutionary hvmn, sung by bands ol bri gands, and will) which your name is mingled ! ' De Lisle heard it and shuddered as it sounded through the streets of Paris, rung from the Al pine passes, u hile lie, a royalist, fled from the infuriated people, frenzied by bis own words. France was a great amphitheatre ol anarchy and blood, and De Lisle s song was the battle cry. There is no national air that will compare with the Marseillaise in sublimity and power, it embraces the sott cadences full ot tbe peas ant's home, and the stormy clangor of silver and steel when an empire is overthrown it endures the memory of the vine dressei's cot tage, and makes the Frenchman, in his exile, cry "La belie France!" forgetful of the torch, and sword, and guillotine, which have made ! bis country a spectre of blood in the e)es of na : tions. Nor can the foreigner listen to it, sung ! by a company of exiles, or executed by a band of musicians, without feeling that it is the pi ■■ broch ol battle and war. If vou wish to be certain ot what you g p ' never marry a girl named Ann ; 'an is an in ' definite strticle. LITTLE MITT IE. BV LI N A BELLE. "Room, gentle flowers, My child would pass to Heaven." "Tired, little one?" "Yes, Aunt Mittie, oh, so tired! And the little hands push back the damp hair from the pure white lorehead, as the head sinks into its favorite resting place—my lap. What a picture of beauty ! So child-like and yet so unlike most children. 1 gaze and yearn for the gilt to transfer its angelic sweetness to canvas. The pure, blue-veined forehead, arched by those delicate, dark brown, almost b'ack, brows, though the hair is a light golden hue, the long fringe-like eye lashes, so long and dark that they throw a rayed shadow on the dove grey eves, the little dimpled mouth, wreathed with a quiet smile ot content, the rose white, pink cheek, (not the purple pink, so common in children, but the true rose hue,) all Ihese might be painted. But could that spiritual expression,that shadow ot something holy, that painters have so essayed to do in pic tures of the Christ-child ? Vain the attempt} it is the spirit shadow that goes home with the soul to Heaven. "It was so warm, but I thought I would not put it off any longer" And tbe pure eyes gave me one of those confiding, loving looks that al ways sent a thrill to my heart. "What was the task that could not be put off, Pet, that you must tire yourself walking in the hot sun to do it" "I have been over to the cemetery to fix Vir gie's grave. Something told me I must do it to day. That selfish myrtle had crawled all over it, and almost smothered my sweet violets.— I had trained it up around the fence anu over the post, but it would come down and crawl all over the grass and near iy covered up the vi olets I planted round dear VYrgie's head. I've got it all nice now Aunt Mittie, and you shall go with me to-morrow to see it."' That "to morrow" never came. White as the pillow on which she lies, the long dark lashes drooping oil marble cheeks, one ot which is pillowed on a little hand, while the other lies like a snow Hake on the coverlet, so small and wasted t hat the little circles of gold that used to clasp the slender finger is now slipping from it. Quiet, yet so quiet, but not sleeping, for there is that expression, so sweet yet so holy. I gazed spell-bound. The large eyes open slowly but so calmly. "Aunt Mit tie, is mamma gone 1" Yes, pet. "I he doctor told her I must die. lam sorry for mamma and father and Tinie and you, but I am not sor ry for myself, I think it will be so nice to be in graven and never have to die again. Heaven funeral and don't let every" ooliy HlVftJX' J. l . 1 " 9' violets. Virgie loved them so." And then those soft eyes look deep, deep into uy soul and seea wall of partition that had never been throw'n down, as the sweet voice murmered, "I know how vou love Papa and Tinie : give all the love vou had for me to mamma." One hard stru g gie and the sweet voice was sealed with a kiss as siie diopped her tiny ring in in) hand. "God gives us ministers of love, Which we regard not being near, Death takes them from us, then we feel. That angets have been with us here." 7/Otl" TO EQUIP FOR A KAXSAS TRIP. A traveler in Kansas, w-ho has evidently "bush-whacked" before, for he talks like an old Western pioneer, or a modern gold-miner, thus advises all who intend making a Kansas tour: Mv advice to all travelers is to take along a sack of cooked provisions, a good bottle of bran dy to mix with the water, for it is so different, sometimes free-stone, sometimes limestone, brook, branch, creek, river and spring, that you'll have thunder and lightning below, in twenty-four hours without it. Also a buffalo robe or big blanket, with a box of matches, and with your gun get your meat, camp out, have a little bag of ground coffee and a tin cup: with these, you can travel from Jericho to Je rusalem, and avoid the taverns, and other annoy ances, otherwise encountered in traveling in new countries. Boil or fry your meat on the coals, use bark for a plate*, if you have flour make up the dough in a piece ol bark off a tree, tw Lt it round a bending stick, stick one end in the ground, while tbe dough end hangs over the fire; when one sid * is baked tuin the other to the fire until baked, and you have a sweet bis cuit. A little bag will cairy along all articles necessary to be used, and you can squat down any where, at any time, turn out your team to crass, and become in reality "a squatter sover eign." LIFE SAVED BY BEING JILTED. —A gentle man of Cincinnati has been "dying bv inches of rheumatism, and after tiavelling for some time he came home almost dead, lie had ben engaged to Le married, and says the Cincinnati Enquirer: "Weary of physicians, attempted cures ami lite itself, he came home to dip, and again went to the Spencer House, thinking he would there receive from the kindly proprietress all the attendance he could at any place, not in ever) sense a home. He was carried Irom tbe boat to the hotel, and more dead than alive, placed ! in the comiortable apartment be had before occupied. On the sixth day alter bis leturn, he learned that his betrothed —thinking he could not survive, and wishing probably to lose no time in her connubial relations —had been married the day previous to another pei son. more wealthy, if less meritorious than lie. All the friends ot" the diseased lover thought that this would prove fatal at once, in his then state of health, but instead of their anticipations being realized, an a week irom the day of the reception of the unsuspected news, he arose from his bed and rapidly recovered, and in less than a month was as well as ever." more polished r-ciety is the less for mality there is in it. WHOLE .W TIBER 3821. VOL 2, NO. 13. A GOOD ARGUMENT. It has been customary, for some time, when a man is arraigned before a court of justice, for his counsel to put in a plea of insanity on behall of the accused. Recently an old negro man applied to us (says the Louisville Demo crat) for instruction how to proceed against one iof his own race whom he charged with pur loining a dollar from him. He told us that be had placed three silver dollars in a small but strong bos, which he kept in his room ; that a few days ago, Handy Andy (we will call him) broke the box open, took a dollar therefrom and decamped. We told him that it was useless to prosecute Andy, unless he had proof to sub stantiate the charge, and then, probably, the accused would be acquitted on the plea of in sanity, as no sane man would take one dollar and leave two behind. Then the old man exclaimed, with great em phasis : "Massa, I tell you dat nigger ain't crazy ; he broke my box open and took de dollar out.— \ow, if lie had broke de box open and put in a dollar, den 1 say he's crazy." LADIES SHOULD READ .YEHS PAPERS. Tt is one great mistake in female education to keep a young lady's time and attention devoted to only the fashionable literature of the day. If you would qualify her for conversation, you must give her something to talk about—give her education with this actual world and its transpiring events. Urge her to read newspa pers, and become familiar with the present character and improvements of our race. His tory is or some importance, but the past world is dead, and we have nothing to do with it.— Our thoughts and cur concerns should be for the present world, to know what it is, and im prove the condition ol it. Let her have au in telligent opinion, and be able to sustain an in telligent conversation conceiving the mental, moral, political and religious improvements of our times. Let the gilded annals arid poems on the centre-table, be kept a part ot the time cov ered with weekly and daily journals. Let the whole family—men, women and children— read the newspapers. OLD BACHELORS. An exchange says : *•11 our maker thought it wrong for Adam to live single, when there was not a woman upon tue eaiui how criminally guilty are old oactie lors, with the world lull ol pretty girts." The Savannah .News meets the railing accusa tion: We protest against If."* IftA4*nft.oJd1 f tA4*nft.oJ d bachelors ence between Adain and the old bachelors of our day. Adam could afford to marry—many bachelors now a days cannot. What with crinoline, five hundred dollar shawls, diamond oracelets, and pin money, it is no small underta king at this age of the world. Eve had no choice —it was Adam or nobody. She had no chance to get up a flirtation, for there was no one to tlirt with. Seeing no other means of tantalizing her husband—a feminine peculiari ty from that day to this—she got hiin in a scrape by eating the forbidden fruit. "Old bachelors are criminally guilty," are they? Give 'old bachelors" the same chance Adam had, and our word lor it, a majority of them would put on matrimony in no time." And then the Columbus Enquirer clinches the matter : "Thems our sentiments, to a fraction. And it is our opinion, lurther, that if some married men were restricted to the same attractions and temptations that Adam had, there would be fewer applications to put offmalrimony when once assumed. O, lor tne good old days of Ad am and Eve." C\ IBB~IGE D DITTO. We have just now heard a cabbage story winch we will cook up lor our laughter loving readers : "Oh! I loves you like anything," said'a young countryman to his sweetheart, warmly pressing her hand. "Ditto," said she, gently returning the pres sure. The ardent lover, not happening to be over and above learned, was sorely puzzled to under stand the meaning ol ditto—nut was ashamed to expose his ignorance by asking the girl. He went home, and the next day being at work in cabbage patch with his lather, he epoke out— "Daduy, what's the meaning of ditto?" "Why," said the old mar., "this here is one cabbage head,ain't it?" "Yes, daddy." "Well, that ore's ditto." "Rot that good-for-nothin' gal!" ejaculated the indignant sonj "she called me cabbage bead, and I'll be darned il ever I go to see her again." iT/~"Do you know Mr ?" asked one It lend ol another, referring to an old gentleman wh > was famous for his fondness of the extract of hops. " Yes sir, I know him very '.veil." " What kind of a man is he?" " Why, in the morning, when he gets up, he is a beer barrel, and in the evening, when ha goes to bed, he is a barrel of beer. "Whatare they talking about?" said a mem ber, during a debate on the money question. "Theology," was the reply. The'ology! Why I thought it was the money question." "Well, money is their deity, and they are discoursing about that." If a journeyman dyer can earn two dollars a day by dyeing what should it cost him to livel