The Waynesburg Republican. (Waynesburg, Pa.) 1867-18??, October 09, 1867, Image 1

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    Term of Publication.
Tarn WATitaaraa Rb-ubucab, Offlea la
Ssyen' bdltdlnr, eit of the Court Hoou, li pnb
llabtd trtrf WednMdsjr moraine, st per
annum, is advahcb, or M If not paid with
in th ymr. All akxrlptloa must
kMttll aaaMlly. Mo paper will be tent
oat of the Btate anleu paid tor is advasck, and
all each snbrerlptloni will invariably be dloeon
tinned at the expiration of the time for which
they are paid.
Commnnlcatloniion tnbjecte of local or general
Intervit am respectfully mltcltrd. To eniare
mum Linn Oivon of tills kind mut Invariably be
Invariably be
ccompunltl by the name of the author, not for
publication, Dili ae oiiarani:
All lotteri ptirtalnluR to bunincaeof
iy otmi
mutt be oUdreawd to the Editor.
Here 'i to the man with homy hands,
Who tuga tha breathing bellows
Where anvil, ring la every land,
He'i loved by all good fellows.
And here' to him who goes afield,
And through the globe is ploughing.
Or with stout arm the axe doth wield,
While anchnt oaks are bowing.
Here's to the delvor in the mine,
The Bailor on the ocean,
VNih those of every craft and llni,
' Who work with true devotion.
Onr love for her who toils io gloom
Whero era nks and wheels ' e cranking;
Bereft she is of nntnre'8 bloom,
Yet God In patience thanking.
. A curse for him who sneers at toil.
And slm as his share of Ubor,
The knave but robs his native soil
While leaning on his labor.
Here may this truth be taught on earth,
Grow more and more lu favors
There is no wealth but owns Its worth
To handicraft and labor.
Then pledge the founders of our wealth,
The br.lldors of our nation;
We know their worth, now to their health
Diink we with acclamation)
Two maids wore walk'ng in the grove,
(They both were growing old),
The one to tell a tale of love,
The other to be told.
"He is not rich," the elder said,
"Nor handsome, nor hlgh-boin;
The man whom I propose to wed,
Most oilier glvls would scorn."
'What in he, then? you make me fear;"
The maiden's tears fell fast ;
"lie was the flut to offer, dear,
And lie may be the last I"
clii fading.
91 OT OOD EKOt'GH FOR llfctt.
In the days of the good old colony of
Virginia, the distinctions of rich and
poor were based upon laws which, like
tho.c of the Mi-des nnd Persians, alter
ed not. One of the most devout fol
lowers of this code, was a wealthy
planter, living in what is known x
tho Northern Neck. He was in all
respects, a frank, openhearted,
gentleman ; but his estimate
of his
fellow men was founded upon the
principle that governed his selection of
horses ni.oon. W ealth, too was by
no means an unimportant feature with
h'm. IIo had onr human weakness,
and, like all of ns, was influenced more
than he ever believed, by pounds,shil
lings nnd pence.
This Mr. G had quite a largo
family, and among them was a daugh
ter whose beauty was the standing toast
of the country. She was just eighteen,
and budding into lovely womanhood.
Not only was she beautiful in person
but her amiable disposition and many
accomplishments made her more tiian
ordinarily attractive, and the gentle
men in the Northern Neck were al
ready sighing for her love,
There were in the country at this
time a young man who was already
rising high in the esteem of his neigh
bors, lie came of good family, tut:
was, as yet, a poor young surveyor,
who had spent much of his time in
traversing unknown forests, with
nothing but his compass for guide, and
' liis chain for his companion, locating
' t land and settling disputed titles. He
Svas a model of manly beauty, and ex
pelled in all thevaried fealsof strength
in which the olden time Americans took
such prido. He was calm and reserv
ed, and there wrs alxmt him a dignifi
ed sweetness of demeanor that accord
ed well with lift frank independence
of character. He was a great favorite
with all that knew him, and there was
no gathering to which he was not
- - .... 1.1
Mr. u seemed especially to like
tno young man, and it was not ionS
before he insisted that tho latter should
abandon all ceremony in his visits to
him, and come and go when he pleas
ed. The invitation was heartily given,
and as promptly accepted.. The yonng
man liked the planter, and he found
the society or the beautiful Mary
. G a very strong attraction. The
' result was that he was frequently at
the planter's residence j so irequently,
. . indeed, that Mrs. G felt called
upon to ask her husband if he did not
' ' think it wrong ti permit him to enjoy
such unreserved intercourse with their
; daughter. The father only laughed
' ' edatthe idea, and said he hoped his
3 Li i i :i i -ii:
anything like love for a poor survey
or to blind her to her duty to her
. , Nevertheless Mary G 1 was not
so fully impressed with this conviction
of dutv ns was her father. She found
' more to admire in the poor surveyor
.1 man in an ner weaitny ana aristocratic
suitors ; and, almost before she knew
it, her heart passed out of her keeping,
' and was given to him. Shekrvedhim
: . with all the honesty and devotion of
net pore Mart ; and she would nave
; thought H happiness to go out with
him to the backwoods and share his
fortunes and trCtbles, no matter how
mnch orrowthey might trine to her.
th ' Nor did she love is valrZ The
n fount; man, whoa knowledge of the
; wtrldwsi afterwards at rreat,kad not
'--" then Isaraad io maidens hindiac th
T'ftm.. . ..St.. 1
Ojsuaauoss WMaogjsry ortw be-
twess hit pososud fast of . Vwly.tsc.
&?ct IM'- i M) fif fit
lie wapeiaftfg HeiillKii.
He knew that in all that makes a man
in integrity and honesty of purpose, he
was the equal of any one. lie believ
ed that, except in wealth, he stood
upon a perfect equality with Mary
G , and loved her honestly and
manfully, and no sooner had he satis
fied himself upon the state of his own
feelings than he confessed his devotion,
simnlv and truthfully, and received
from the lady's lips the assurance thr J
she loved him dearly.
Scorning to occupy a doubtful po
sition, or to cause the young lady to
conceal aught from her parents, the
young man Lankly and manluily ask
ed Mr. G for his daughter's hand,
Verv anarrv rrrcw the planter as he
listened to the audacious proposal.
He stormed and swore uinousiy, aii(
denounced the young man as an un
grentful and insolent npstiut.
"My daughter has always been ac
customed to riding in her own carriage,"
he said. ''Who are you, sir ?"
"A gentleman, sir," replied the
young man, quietly j and he left the
Tho lovers were parted. Tho lady
married 6oon after, a wealthy planter,
and the young man went out again into
the world, to battle with his heart and
"conquer his unhappy passions. He
subdued it ; but although ho after
ward married a woman whom he lov
ed honestly and truthfully, and who
was worthy of his love, he never was
wholly dead to his first love.
The time passed on, and the young
man began to reap the reward of his
laliors. IIo had never been to the
house of Mr. G since his cruel re
pulse by the planter 5 but the latter
could not forget him, as his name scon
became familiar in every Virginia
household. Higher and higher he
rose every day, until he gained a posi
tion from which lie could look upon
the proud planter. Wealth came to
him, too. When the great struggle for
independence dawned, nnd he was in
his prime, a happy husband, and one
of the most distinguished men in
America. The struggle went on, and
soon too "poor surveyor' neiu me
.. it 1 1 i .1
highest and proudest position in the
When tho American army passed in
triumph through the streets of Wil
liamsburg, the ancient capital of Vir
ginia, after thesurrenderof Cornwallis,
the officer riding at the head of tho
column chanced to glance up nt one of
the neighboring balconies, which was
crowded with ladies. Rccignizing
one of them ho raised his hat and
Iwwed profoundly. There wasa com
motion 011 the balcony, and some one
wanted water, saying Mrs. Lee lmis
fu'nted. Turning to a young man
who rode near him, the oftifcr said
p-rnvolv ! K'
"Henry, I fear your mother has
fainted. You had liettcr leave the
column, and go to her."
The speaker was George "Washing
ton, once the "poor surveyor," but
then Commander-in-Chief of the
armies of the United States. The
young man was Colonel Henry Lee,
the commander of the fimous "Light
Cavnlrv legion :" the lady was n
mother, and formerly Miss G , the
belle of tho "ISorlhern INcok.
"Matuc Twain" describes as fol
lows the personnel of the Imperial
famtlvof Kussia:
"The Emperor had on a white cloth
cap, and white cloth coat and nanta
lixins. all of questionable .fineness.
The Empress and her daughter wore
simple suits of foulard, with a little
blue spot in it, blue trimmings, low
crowned straw hats trimmed with blue
velvet, linen collars, clerical neck ties
of muslin, blue sashes, flesh-colored
gloves, parasols lady readers will
take due notice. The exceeding sim
plicity of these dresses would insure
inem against creating n Benisuiim m
Broadway. The little Grand Duke
wore a red calico blouse and a straw
'ni Ami !.! K.a vtn tnlswin a timlrfwl intii
' ililU ttliu. JliUl Ilia lamiwiiLj i.nvrai.v -"
; Simpiicity 0f costume and
;k; , t t , f manner cannot
go very well together, and I was curi
ous to see how the imperial parv
would act They acted as if they had
never been use to anything finer.
They were as free from any semblance
of pride or haughtiness as if their
house had alwavs been a village min
ist.'s house. They conversed freely
and nnconstrainedly with anybody
"nd everybody that came along, (they
all sneak English,, and so did the
great officers of tho Empire that were
with them.
A BURGLAR named Frank Riley
was arrested in Chicago, a few dayi
ago, for the crime of breaking open a
safe in IxmisviIIe, Kentucky, am!
taking therefrom the sum of forty-six
thousand dollars. Among the effects
found on his person by the officers of
justice was the following letter :
. Executive Mansion,
Washington, D. C, Dec 13, 1866.
"Henry A. Smythe, Collector of Cus
toms, INew 1 one :
"Sir This will introduce to your
favorable consideration Frank Kiley,
of New York City, viA whoee charac
ter! became acquainted mi lematee,
and whom I commend toyou as worthy
of s suitable appointment under you.
"With great respect, very truly
Thia docament was in a very dilapi.
dated ssodition, arising from ooneUnt
om,s Ur. Susy informed the offi-
Henry Ward Beecher is never s
great as when yon see him among
men, or we might scy, perhaps, among
children. He never left off being a
boy. There is something so honest,
noble and childlike in his great square-
out social utterances, that in tri3
sphere he is perfectly irresistible. So !
powerful has this influence become
that the whole city of Brooklyn, and
to a considerable extent the whole na
tiou, is aff oted by his social example.
The narrow, contcmptiblo mannerism
that characteriz" the people atleoting
Churchaiiity, the Miss Nancvish wavs
of too many, even ot our clergy, the
pompous aire, exquisite snobbish-
, ness, pious propriety, and severely or
nate methods 01 soeecn ana writing
commonly supposed to give evidences
of refinement and taste, tho great
thundeiersweepsaway withouo blastol
11s trumpet of truth.
JUr. lieecher lias taught tne woriu
that to be saints men need not be
hypocrites,and to love the beautifuljone
need not be a sap-head. Culture may
kill out a man s uaturalness, and leave 1
only mere airs. Ueaa Brummel and
Jieeclicr are lorcver at war. un, now
disdainfully Araniinta Sophranisba
Roscwaler inverts and elevates her
proboscis at tho mention of some char
actistio "Beet'herism" of the Brooklyn
Bruncrgcs. "Did Mr. Bcc.'her actu
ally play ugly mug, and stir the pud
ding at a social gathering ?" said one
of these ancient maiden saints to us a
few days since. "It is positively hor
rid. It is a characteristic 01 men
who love truth supremely llin.t per-
m 11
sons have but little innuence over
them. God makes a truly wise man
so simple and unpretending that men
never look into the manger lor tne
King of the kingdom coming. Yet
it is there that we find our King.
"A little child shall lead them." The
child is the model for Christians to
follow and frame their characters by.
So does Mr. Beechcr. So do not the
great, the grand, and those filled with
pomp and bIiow. Visit Brooklyn,
and you shall see a man as brown as
a Western farmer, with a perfect tum
ble of hair, falling all over shoulders
as broad as a blacksmith's. His gait
is rapid, abrupt and blunt. He rolls
as he walks like a Cape Cod shipmas
ter. He wears a rough sack coat,
pepper and salt perhaps, breeches,
wide, roomy, and better fitting than
the pants on Webster's statue in front
of the State House in Boston. He
swings his arms as he gets over the
ground, ever and anon lifting his hat
nud smoothing back his hair over his
mosxive forehead. Ilia leaturcs are
coarse, his skin as rough nnd ruddy
as a Jack Tar's, and his whole air that
of a man overflowing with human
nature. "How are you?" is his grcct
'nv as he mccti you no manncrish
hand-shaking or I rench airs ; ho pass-
(1 right 011 unless you have business.
Then if you hem or haw, or hesitate
or don't come right to the point, ten
chances to one it ho docs not taKe
French leave at once, and leave you to
meditate upon tho abruptness of the
wonderful man.
In short, Mr. Beechcr has no non
sense in his make up. lie is mini
with good sense, ond woe be to Mr.
Diplomacy if he crosses his path with
his endless circumlocutions. He
crashes right in on your forms of pro
priety, your nirs and distinguished
considerations. We once saw him
beset by a committee it must have
been sent to extend thanks and dis
tinguished consideration for his great
services in bchait 01 our country
while in England. There wero kid
gloves of course. There was a per
fect puff of patchouly from silk hand
kerchiefs and court dresses, and dia
monds in a shower, and all that. Then
the French etiquette, the prelimina
ries, the coming to the point, the
craven manner, the bowings, nonsense,
hypocrisy, gentility, in short, refine
ment of the poor creatures, bewildered
the poor man so that when at lost he
shut them off with an abrupt grunt,
not even saying good evening, we
thought he breathed again as one gasp
ing tor fresh air. 1 his is the Amen
ennism of our times and country. He
is religiously and politically an em
bodiment of our future Church and
State. As the prophet of the coming
kingdom, he heralds in what his whole
life will yet exemplify. No man of
this nation is to impress upon the
nation his character more than Henry
Ward Beecher.
Franklin stimped his sprit of econ
omy upon our American boys, but
Mr. Beecher will stamp his whole soul
upon the lives and aspirations of our
whole people.
Cure fob Ingrowing Nailssv
It is stated cauterization by hot tal
low is an immediate core for ingrowing
nails. Put a small piece of tallow in
a spoon and hold it over a lamp nntil
it becomes very hot, and then drop
between the nail and the granulations.
The effect is most magical. Pain and
tenderness are at once relieved, and in
a few days the 'granulations all go
away, leaving the diseased ports dry
and destitute of all feeling, and the
edge of the nail exposed so as to admit
of being paired away without any in
convenienoe. 1 The operation causes
but little pain if the tallow is properly
heated. ' :
Apropos A. "ladies' shoemaker"
advertises himself as one of the lumina
ries of the "aols her system." .
The business that mainly occupies
men in this world is trade ; the secret
of success in trade, after reasonable
judgement and industry are used, is
advertising. This fact was never so
generally recognized by business men
0 . 1 ?il- At? !i it
as now, ana wiui wis recognition wey
include the fact that only jiidi-aous ad-
!. !....:. L T LA J ,t
it judicious is one of the deepest pro
blems which come before them. For
this problem contains many conditions,
such as, for example, the medium for
advertising, tt-e time, the region, the
class of persoiU to be addressed, the
quality and quantity of things said,
the persistence thai may be desirable,
and, a'jove all, the discovery of some
new and striking way of seizing pub
):e attention. For the priz:i of1 ad
vertising are the result of combining
bold expenditures with original anil
pleasing methods.
The theories of advertisers upon all
these conditions, particular .'y tlie last,
are wonderfully various, those who
disbelieved in advertising at all, being
now too few for mention. One" man
believes in advertising in publieaiio. :-
where all his competitors advertise.!
another where ho will bo aloue : one
thinks advertising needless when busi
ness is brisk, and useless when it is
dull ; while another thinks the reverse;
one believes 111 the cwy, another in the
town 5 one bases his hope on mere
length, and another takes half a page
to print a few sentences, while another
puts his announcement npsido down.
Some advertise moderately and steadi
ly, and some inako showy displays oc
casionally. Iarge cities are full of
devices outside of Newspapers. Boys
distribute handbills at tho ferries and
on the streets 5 a painted bed with net
tings looped up greets the eyes of those
who cross Fulton ferry, in mosquito
time; men march solemnly about,
dressed in some mysterious garment
that proclaims the merits of India
rubber goods and weather strips, or
covered with buttons Jiom crown to
sole, or bearing sign boards of chiro
podists; a nuisance in the shapo of an
advertising van haunts Broadway, and
the curbstones, the fences, and the
very pavemcuts everywhere are a
It may be called accidental, but the
fact is that nearly all of the large for
tunes made intrude during the Inf.'
thirty years, both in this country nnd
in England, have been made in con
nection with iwrsistent and studied ad
vertising. Drs. Jayne, Brnndreth and
Ayer, Davis' Pain-killer, Russia salve,
Bonner's Leihcr, Plantation Bitters,
Hostctter's Bitters, Spalding's prepar
ed glue, Holloway's pills, Eastman's
business college, and Jiarnum s Mu
seum are good examples. The amount
of money sometimes paid for ndver
Using is almost incredible, some firms
having expended fifty thousand dol
lars in a single week, and even tens of
thousands upon a single advertise
ment. Bcsido burdening the fences,
several parlies have their own poets
and advertisement writers, at liberal
salaries. Messrs. Phalon & Son arc
reported to have such a man, to whom
thev nav three thousand dollars a vcar.
and whoso duty was for a time com
prised 111 devising a new conundrum
every day, which should set forth a
new the night blooming ccrcus.
The secret of judicious newspaper
advertising may be briefly stated. It
consists, not in long standing adver
tisements, which are inevitably placed
in obscure corners ; but in short, fresh
paragraphs, 1 renewed frequently, and
possessing tho interest of reading mat
ter. These are read for their own
sake, and make new customers, as well
as guide old ones.
Mrs. Lincoln. Amongst all the
mean things done by tho democrats,
about the meanest is the persistence
with which they dishonored President
Lincoln, and visit their hatred of him
upon his willow. While Brick Pome
roy shocks all decent people by his ri
baldry over the murder of our martyr
ed chief, his more respectable coadju
tors manufacture slanders on her who
brars his name. One story has scarce
run ib) rounds before another is started
aTicr it ; and the last, by the World,
is, that she is in New York, under
the name of Mrs. Clarke, trying to
sell her clothing and jewelry to add to
her slender income, it Mrs. Jjincoln
is reduced to such necessity, shame to
the land, and it is the people, not her
self, she screened when she dropped
that honored name, in such a transac
tion 5 but we have no doubt the story
is a sheer fabrication, made to gratify
democratic hate of the great dead, who
had honored his wife as do few living
men. Piflta. Gazette.
The Paris Exposition has been a
greatpecuniary speculation, and should
the Emperor declare its permanency,
it will prove a constant source of
wealth. According to agreement, the
profits, if any, arising from the Expo
sition, are to be divided equally be
tween the Btate, the city of Paris, and
the company owning the charter, grant
ed by a law passed by the French
Legislature, in 1865, for the purpose
of organizing this stupendous under
taking. Ik a matrimonial advertisement for
a husband, tho advertiser says that as
she "wants a full-grown man, none
need apply who are under six feet."
That ia notan unnatural notion for a
lady bent or by-men.
Tll t'cvcral Valvoatoa.
A correspondent writing from Gal
veston, Sept. 9th, says:
The city resembles one vast hospi-
trl. Tho number of deaths to date
since commencement, (July 24th,)
reaches nine hundred, mostly North
ern and Western people, foreigners,
and officers and employees, civil and
nilitary, of the United States, book
keepers, and clerks, brought here to
die dv the hundred from the larger
Northern, Western and Eastern cities;
members of Northern, Western and
foreign firms and business houses, one
third of which, somo with large stocks
of goods, are now closed on account
of employers and employees having
beta summoned by "ellow Jack" to
their long and narrow houses in the
graveyard. The Jews have suffered
most 111 proportion to their number,
many of them succumbing to their
noied dread of death nfter taking the
disease. This month, 011 account of
its sudden weather changes and equi
noctial storms, will prove the most fa
tal. The type of disease is very malig
nant. Several of our best physicians,
among them Drs. Rowe, Taylor, ifcc,
ot tho United States army, and JJra.
1 fauna and Gault, of tho Galveston
Medical College faculty, fell victinB
and are in their graves. Others of
the profession are now down with it.
The streets ore nearly deserted; busi
ness is at a stand; the city wears the
aspect of a continuous Sabbath; gloom
has settled upon the countenances of
many you meet; the churches are de
serted; the firing of tho United States
army and navy signal guns, the ring-
' r 1 1 1 II. 1 xl ; I
1N OI Oil UCU, UI1U UllltT IlUlSfS I11IVB
been stopped authoritatively during
the epidemic, not to disturb the fever
sick, whom we count by thousands
and in every house. Nurses and phy
sicians are worn out and scarce, inc
suffering is very great, and much of it
remains untoldonly known to Him
who scourges us in His wrath.-
An Incident in the Cabs. In
ono of the ears that ply Fulton ave
nue, Brooklyn, somo days since, a
young swell in olbumen pantaloons,
azure vest and milky tie, was disgrac
ing tobacco by putting it into his
mouth, ond wantonly sending the
liquid residuum over tho ear floor.
In its "flight" it alighted on the dress
of a lady that circumstances forced to
sit near thespittoon, and the fellow was
tiltcrly too gross even to apologize.
1 lowever, when the lady made a re
quest for his handkerchief to repair
the stain as far as might be, and when
the fellow refusal, he was considera
bly surprised, nnd the passengers de
lighted, by the lady very quietly turn
ing up that section of her dress soiled
by the fellow's brutality, and wiping
it on tho dandy's pantaloons, with a
result that made littlo channels run
down to his boots. With a simple
"Tako that, you dirty puppy," the
woman resumed her composure, and
the man suddenly remembered that he
had an errand on the street. Let 'em
all be served that way, aud rub it in
Last week a hotel-keeper in Lan
caster, "smclled a mice 111 this wise
Two countrymen took lodging nt his
place, and fared sumptuously, drinli
ing three bottl 8 ot wine daily. I he
last day, and before they had settled
their bill, a dispute arose nlxjut the
speed of their horses. They at last
settled upon a race, and appointed the
landlord judge. When they were
ready, tho judge, like those of the
Olympian games, gave the word one,
two, three, and go. Away they went,
and have neither been seen nor heard
of since. No doubt they ore runuing
at this moment, (a bill in some other
place,) leaving this landlord iully com
penatcd by having had the honor of
being judge.
In a speech nt Pleasant Valley,
Ohio, General Garfield said that in a
recent conversation with him, Gen.
Grant betrayed the deepest anxiety as
to the mischief the President may
do before Congress meete. Genera'.
Schenck, remarking that Congress
would soon be in session again, Gen.
Grant anxiously replied, "It will I.
seventy-eight days yet." "Why, Gen
cral," exclaimed Schenck, considera
bly surprised, "do you count the
days?" "Yes, I do," replied General
Grant, "it will be just seventy-eight
days, and I would to God the time
were nearer !"
A man in Round Rock, Texas,
slaughtered a beef and found in it a
gen true ten dollar gold piece. A far
mer lost a purse containing hlteen
dollars in gold while surveying on the
prairies in the locality, and it is sup
posed that the steer swallowed the com
while chewing the purse, The money
was lost several years ago.
A LITTLE girl who bad been visiting
in the family of a neighbor, hearing
them speak ot ner lather being
widower, on her return home address
ed him thus : "Pa, are you a widow
er r "Yes. my child. Don t you
know your mothers dead?" "Why.
yes, I Knew mother was dead; but you
always told me you was a new I or
er." '
The Philadelphia Ledger, which is
one of the largest printing establish
menta in the United States, was ttartr
ed in 1838. by three Journeymen prin
ten, two of whom are yet living and
are millKHinairea. -
NO. 17.
Front the Colutnbas (Ohio.) Journal
We arfl informed that a village in
one of tho "backbone" Democratic
counties was the scene of a funny in
cident a fiiw evenings since whereby
a Democratic orator was titterly con
founded and brought to grief by men
of his own party. Ihe circumstances
are as follows i
lie had told them how the rich
bondholder had reduced them to
slavery in spite of the efforts of the
Goddess of Liberty and several other
personages, both human and celestial,
till then ftnknown to the audience. He
quoted extensively from George Fran
cis Troiu's "deraagoguo" speech, and
among other things tho following:
"Work! work I work!
From the dnwn to the dusk of day,
For your hopes are crushed with a weight of
That tho toil ot your llfo woa't pay !"
Having wrought up his hearers al
most to mutiny, lie Icit that branch of
his subject, and proposed to show up
some of tho llepiiblicnii leaders, le
guining with Ben Wade. "Whv, fel
low-citizen, said he, "there is lien
"Wade, a regular agrarian, who wants
all the proerty divided so that every
ninn will have an equal slmriO'
Thundering applauses, and cries of
"Bully for him!'' "Thai's tho tick
et!" "He's tho man for mo!''
"Why, fellow-citizens," said he, "Ben
Vadeisa IJmlical and an agrarian;
he" Deafening applause, and yells
of "Good for the Biulicals !" "Bully
for tho 'grnrians !"
The speaker was thunderstruck.
Evidently, his hearers had never
heard of Ben Wade and tho Badicals.
They had been well stirred up against
the rich, and they thought that radi-
( lism was a species of democracy, of
wlncli lien n ado was the champion.
"Gentlemen fellow citizens, con
tinued tho speaker, "I don't think you
exactly understand me. Ben W ade
is the V ice lTciilent, elected by the
Uni I tea Is, and lie is liunselt a Kadical,
.md an agrarian land pirate to boot.
Why, what do you think? IIo pre
poses to take the rich man's property,
lor winch lie toiled 111 early lile, and
give it to those who have no property,
even to those who do not work. hut
do you "
A veice, "lhree cheers lor lien
Wade !"
And in snilo of all that two or
three village leaders, candidates lor
constable and supervisor, could do, the
crowd gave three tliiinderini cheers
fur Ben Woilo and tho "'t,iaiinns.
The orator, finding that he had got on
the wrong track, abruptly brought his
remarks to a close. A lie, in that m
stance, made Ben Wade several friends,
yet we scarcely feel like eongratulii'
ting him on the acquisition.
A.fTKtl'ITY or THE lit' WAX RACE.
Shakespeare, in "As You Like It,"
makes Rosalind fay, "The poor world
is almost six thousnn 1 years old, and
there are plenty of people in our own
liay who believe that this globe came
IVcdi fi'om the hand of the Creator
only sixty centuries ago. But geolo
gy has exploded that theory, ami tne
ahlest theologians now ogreo that the
"six days" of the creation represent
vast periods ot time, while tiie earth
itself is of inconceivable antiquity.
Ihe question winch now excites atr
tention is whether the human nice is
notfiir older than is generally believ
ed, and whether it wits not contempo
rary with tho great animals, remains
of which are now and then discovered,
but which becamo extinct before the
date of any history, sacred or profane,
or even of tradition. The interesting
discoveries resulting from the explora
tions now in progress in Kent's Cav
ern, Devonshire, England, show, in
disputably, thnt man was in existence
when the mammoth, three dillercnt
species of the elephant, the rhinoceros,
-.i i
jions, ami ouier iimitmi.i were cumiiiuii
in that country, but which are now
extinct, for the bones of the animals
mve been found, and with them, tools,
weapons, and other articles winch
were the unmistakable work of human
hands, guided by intelligence. These
remains have been lound imbedded in
gravel ond stalagmite, and the explo
rations have been conducted under
circunistanccs ond with a care pre
cluding the posibility of deception.
A report ot these discoveries has
been laid liefore the British Associa
tion for the Advancement of Science,
in session at Dundee during the pres
ent month, and an interesting discuss
ion upon the antiquity of tiie human
race ensued. Sir Charles Lyell took
the ground that these discoveries were
proof positive that man was co-exist-
ent with the mammoth and other ex
tinct animals which have been believ
ed, heretofore, to antedate the human
race. Other members agreed with
him, nnd in the face of these discover
ies, defiantly challenged those "who
had whispered abroad objections to the
theory of the antiquity of man, to come
forward and state them now. wona.
Grkat Ylsld of Wise. George
Hasmnn, one of the great wine grow
ers of Wisconsin, made 1,030 gallons
of pure grape juice from 470 Concord
vines, on 4-10 of an acre, and 1,300
gallon of pure grape juice from an
acre of Norton's Virginia, containing
1,200 vines.
"Vitals baked here," is the horri
ble announcement placarded in the
windWw of Nw York eating house.
Terms of AdTertlwlnur
Adykotibexeictb Inserted at SI aapenqiinre
. . I 1 . -. ! - .1 U lUlI .1111111.
for xuh additional insertion j (ten llm or If
counted a square). All trauslent adertisem..n I
10 ue paia lor in advance. . ... .
U.rM.u. HnriPHMlnnilwtha tlMld Of llMVll
news will be charged Invariably 10 renin a line
lorencti iniwruoo. ,
A lllwnd deduction made to persona advertls
lng by the qunrtei', half-year or year. Special
nottcen charged one-bull mute than regular d
TertltM'luentH. Job l'ltixnoof everrklnd In Plulniintl Fan
cy eo!oi: Hand-iii, lUnnks, Curds Paiimhli'ti',
Ae., 01 eeiy vmieiy nnd style, pilntcilut tli
shortest notice. The l:r PtRLU'AN OrnrK litis
JiMt been le-lttted, and every thing In the rrlnl
lng line enn be executed In lbs most artlstiil
uiannerand at tne lowest mica.
Ix)Vi8 Napolfx)n'8 Palace. A
story is told in private circles about a
wealthy mt ill-informed American
who wont to Taris and applied lor
lodgings at one of the most aristocratic
"old family" mansions of tho city,
where he read the words"Hotel de C'ril
lon" over ihe door. Haughtily dis-
missed there, ho next applied at an
other of the same sort, tno "Hotel de
Boissy," unaware that tiie custom of
placing the name over the door is one.
of the old observances of the French
aristocracy. At this juncture some
one informed him of his blunder, and
great was his chagriu. Subsequently
no met a friend who recommended him
to go to the "Hotel du Louvre," which
is really a public house of entertain
ment. But ignoiance had fiiccumlKHl
to wisdom. "No, hang it I" was the
erudite reply, "I'm up to that, you
know j you don't get 1110 to apply for
board nt Louis Napoleon't jmtuee !"
Vr? experienced editor pays a high
nud deserved compliment to tho fair
patrons of tho press. Women, ho
says, ore tho best subscribers in the
world to newspapers, magazines, etc.
We have been an editor for forty years,
and never lost a dollar by female mh-
scribers. They seem to make it a
point of conscientious duty to p:iv the
preacher and the printer two citfscs
ot tho community that stiller more bv
bad pay, and no pay at all, tlmii all
tho rest put together.
A Saratoga correspondent savs
that a burlesque advertisement was
pasted in the Union Hotel, annouiic-
5 Al -4 lt - 1 X 1..
Iligliitll, ill oriier to overcome it iituu-
inl prejudice against the use of hash,
the proprietor will, on Monday, plain
a two dolkr and a half gold piece in
a certain quantity ot tho hash; on
Tuesday, one-half that omount in two
pieces ; on Wednesday, one-third Unit
anion nt in three pieces," and so on for
a week.
Bayard Taylor, in a recent letter
to tho New York Tribune, says :
"Since I have come to Europe I have
Ix-en cohs.autly called upon, in France,
Switzerland and Germany, to explain
our present dificulty, ami that while 1
have found a great many persons un
friendly to the permanence of tint
Union, no ono has the courage to con
fess himself on admirer of Andrew
Pat's Turtle. The head of a
turtle, for several days after its tole
ration from the body, retains and ex
hibits animal lifo and sensation. An
Irishman had decapitated one, 'find
some days afterwards was omu -ipg
himself by putting sticks in its mom n,
which it bit with violence, A lady
who saw the proceeding exclaimed
"Why, Patrick, I thought the tai l It
was dead!" "So ho is, ma'am; but
the cr.itur's not sensible of it,"
The Franklin, (Louisiana,) rianlrrx'
Banner of the 7th, contains tho fol
lowing interesting paragraph in a
leader detailing tho inducements to
emigrants: "There arc three mill
ions of acres of tillable lands in At-
takapas nnd St. Itndry, which can
be bought, According to quality ami
quantity, or location) at from from ft I
to &10 per acre. We know ot good
sugar lands that can lie Iwught for
$10 an aero, a few miles from naviya
The Use op TonAf. This is
the way boys reason whon forbidden to
use tobaccos The lawyer smokes; bow
can it bo illegal ? Tho doctor chews ;
how can it Iki unwholesome ? The.
clergy smilf ; how can it. lie immoral ?
The politician smokes, chews or sou'l's;
how can it be impolite ?
Newspapers ix the Uxiri-n
States. In the year lift) there wer.j
but seven ircvsapcrs and periodicals
published in the United States; in
1810 there 3o0, including 25 publish
ed daily; in 1832 there were 5&S; in
1800, 2,01, circiihiting annually
927,951,ol8 copies.
A FreN'cii Savan has likened tho
uickness of volition in an animal to
e telegraph. He tells his class:
When the whale is harpooned the
nerve allectcd instantly teiegrapns in
the creatures' brain, "Harpoon in tail;"
upon which tho brain telegraphs back,
"Jerk tail and upset boat." What a
wonderful thing is science.
A correspondent of the Maine
Farmer, says: "Jinny a housewife
may le glou to know when she has a
piece of fresh meat she wishes to keep
a few days, that it can be succcssiUy
done by placing it in a dish and cov
ering it with milk. Sour milk. , or
buttermilk will do as well. 1 have
practiced the plan for years."
"I say Jones, how is it that your
wife dresses so magnificently, and you
always appear out at the elbows ?"
Jones, (impressively and significantly,)
'yon see, Inompson, my wife dressos
according to the Gazette of Fanlmm,
and I dress according to my Ledger."
Ladies are like watches pretty
enough to look at sweet faces and
delicate hands, but some'hing dilhVult.
to regulate when set "agoing." -.
Next month all the conductors aud
other employees of tho Erie Road Ore
to be uniformed with blue coat, naval
cap, and gray pantaloons. ,N , ,, .- .
A BALL struck a little , boy in the
eye last week. Strange to say,' the
bawl immediately came out ot; lis
mouth. A i' :, j v. ..sifl
if '(