M-Lancaatar Fanning, Saturday, Novambar 13,1983
TAKING HHj
TIME
by Rebecca Escott
Extension Home Economist
Taking Time to
Celebrate Families
Last week I spent three wonder
ful days in Lebanon County shar
ing my ideas about keeping
families in touch. I wonder as I’m
writing this column if I met any
one reading this while I was there.
That program is helping me to
gear up for National Family
Week.
National Family Week is cele
brated annually during the week
of Thanksgiving. Researchers Dr.
Nick Stinnett, Dr. John DeFrain,
Dr. Kerry Kerber and Professor
Lois Schwab cooperated on a pro
ject to answer the question, “How
do families succeed?”. I thought
he answer to that question woudl
be an appropriate one to explore in
anticipation of National Family
Week.
These researchers identified six
common traits that were essential
to these families* success. They
found that successful families
spend time together, practice
healthy communication patterns,
show appreciation for one
another, and develop and use cop
ing skills. They also observed that
the family members displayed a
strong sense of commitment to
each other and shared a common
set of spiritual values that focused
on giving and receiving love and
having mutual trust
In fact as they studied, they
observed that “healthy” families
were not necessarily families that
had an absence of problems but
rather families who used their
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trust, love, and other family
strengths to effectively address
those problems.
I encourage you to focus on
these six qualities to strengthen
your own family in 1993. Clip the
following paragraphs and save
them as a “to do” list for Thanks
giving week.
* Sunday, November 12st:
Today is die kick-off day for
National Family Week. Relax as a
family and browse through the
ideas listed below to plan your
week’s activities.
* Monday. November 22nd:
Focus on commitment. This is a
promise of time and energy to help
other family members reach their
potentials. Try the activity “Who
Can Help Me?”. List items or situ
ations in which someone in your
family needs help in one column
on a sheet of paper.
Examples might be checking
homework, opening a door, fixing
a clock or reading the directions
for a game. Then in a second col
umn ask who can help. Usually
someone else in the family can
help. Lode there fust. Then make
a plan to share those talents the
next time the situation arises.
* Tuesday, November 23rd:
Focus on spirituality/family well
ness. At some point today say “I
love you” to each member of your
family. Add a hug for emphasis.
• Wednesday, November 24th:
Focus on communication. Pay
attention to other people’s com
ments today. Try to empathize
with the person who is speaking
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instead of giving advice or saying,
M Oh, I’m sure he didn’t mean it.
You shouldn’t feel that way.”
Today is likely to be hectic.
Accept and help others name their
feelings. Don’t be bashful—name
the feelings you’re having too.
* Thursday, November 25th;
Focus on appreciation. As you
share a Thanksgiving Day meal
together, have each person men
tion something about another indi
vidual at the table that she appreci
ates or is thankful for. If you are
not gathering with your family, set
aside a few quiet moments today
to jot these “appreciation notes”
on a postcard and sent them to
people you love. Even at a dis
tance you can help preserve and
nurture families.
♦ Friday, November 26th:
Focus on time together. Between
or instead of football games, turn
the TV off and play a card game,
put a puzzle together or cook up a
treat in the kitchen. If you are
separated from family, arrange to
visit someone elseo who may be
spending the holiday weekend
alone and share time together.
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O In late fall the nights are
much longer than the days and the
sun is lower in the sky. These con
ditions mean that house plants are
receiving reduced natural light.
Position your plants so that they
receive maximum light by moying
them closer to windows and
adjusting curtaink and blinds.
O Use your microwave to dry
flower petals from cut flower bou
quets for potpourri. Spread flower
petals in a single layer on a paper
towel and place in die microwave
along with a cup half full of water.
Microwave for one mimite on full
power. Check them to see if they
are dry; if not, rotate the towel one
* Saturday, November 27th;
Focus on coping skills. Play
“What if...”. Describe problem
circumstances and let others in the
group problem solve. Who knows,
these may be experiences they
will really encounter in the weeks
and years ahead. (And don’t forget
to read this week’s Taking Time
column in Lancaster Farming!)
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Horticulture Hints
half turn and microwave the petals
ten seconds longer. Poinsettia,
rose and gerbera flower petals
microwave well and will retain
their bright colors.
O This is the ideal time to lime
your vegetable garden or lawn.
Take a soil test first to accurately
assess how much lime is needed.
O Leaves will compost three
times foster if they are shredded
before being placed in the com
post pile.
O Hardy mums that were
placed in large containers this fall
will survive the winter better if
they are moved into an area where
they will not be subjected to sub
zero temperatures and drying
winds. If possible relocate the
containers to an unheated garage
or storage shed. Water the plants
well before moving and check
them during the winter to be sure
they don't get bone dry.
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