TAKING
TIME
by Rebecca Escoft
Extension Home Economist
In Touch With Teas
Summer time is an interesting
time for parents and teens. Teens
are out of school, and summer
schedules bring new routines
part-time jobs, evening picnics,
movies, trips to the lake or amuse
ment park.
These new routines often make
parents feel insecure. It’s a chal
lenge to stay in touch with teen
agers. Elizabeth Crary. parent
educator, described die family di
lemma this way, “Most parents of
teens want their children to be able
to talk with them, but with most of
these children, there has to be 90
percent ‘dead time’ fbr the ten per
cent that’s going to work ... so
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you have to be around a lot, and
listening a lot, and putting up with
a lot of chaos, in order to be avail
able for the three or four minutes
where they’re willing to share
with you.**
That’s an important investment
of time. Crary comments, “You
can’t get to the end without going
through the middle.” Several
months ago, I heard a public ser
vice announcement that made a
lasting impression on me. It was a
cute twist on the age-old message
of generations staying in touch.
The speaker began, “KIDS, Want
to know how to stay in touch with
your parents? Stay tuned for a few
quick tips ...” The message con-
tinued with a list of fail-safe ways
for kids to stay in touch with the
older generation listen to their
music, watch one of their favorite
movies with them, try saying
"Please” and ‘Thank You.” The
speaker continued with a few
other suggestions. Wow!
I reflected on how we always
blame the other generation for be
ing either old-fashioned or radical
and-off the wall Staying in touch
takes both groups parents and
teen's making efforts to comg,
together.
That coming together may not
be glorious, immediate bonding.
The biggest hurdle may be accept
ing the fact that “hanging out” to
gether time is not wasted time
even though there may be little or
no dialogue. Don’t force conver
sation. Let your teen initiate as she
wants. Remember Craiy’s point
about 90 percent dead time for ten
percent pay off.
Here are a few suggestions to
help parents stay in touch with
their, children.
Encourage your children to in
vite friends to your home. This is a
good way to welcome teens. Be
excited about knowing their
friends. When your daughter men-
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tions working with or running into
a friend from school, ask her to
show you that person’s picture in a
school yearbook.
Suggest that your son select a
cassette tape to play on a family
road trip. Often lyrics are printed
inside the tape covers. This can
help you follow the message if the
words get lost in the rhythm for
you. Remember, you can control
the volume. Measure your ques
tions or comments carefully be
fore speaking. Silence is often a
good thing.
Ask your child for a suggestion
on a new hairstyle, pair of earrings
or shorts. Ask your spouse out for
a date and have your teen suggest
a movie to see.
Ask them for ideas for munch
ics for a picnic or party. They may
suggest a new variety of chips or
Ice Cream Safari At Zoo
Adventurers of all ages can
embark on an “Ice Cream Safari”
at the Erie Zoo in honor of Nation
al Ice Cream Month.
The safari, part of a statewide
“Pennsylvanians Scream for Ice
Cream,” campaign, will run from
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Staying in touch with your
teens also means staying in touch
with other parents. Adults may be
able to circumvent a struggle with
teens by communicating in ad
vance. Pick up the phone and dis
cuss an overnight patty and the de
tails with other parents. Agree on
rules, spending money, curfews,
etc. Reasonable pacts with other
parents help lessen the pressure to
bend a standard because “every
one else’s parents said it was
okay.”
Continue to work at spending
time together so that during a time
of need, your teen will consider
you understanding and approach
able. Your 90 percent dead time
will be worth it when that sharing
occurs. It’s truly an investment in
their lives.
11 a.tn. until 3 p.m. on Wednes
day, July 21. Events such as the
safari promote the state’s large ice
cream industry, which is ranked
second in the nation for total
production.
Visitors to the event must carry
a passport to travel through vari
ous dairy ports-of-call including
frozen yogurt sampling and ice
cream novelties. Visitors will
learn the art of homemade ice
cream making, and, for the kids,
tin can ice cream making. Th?
final stop will be an ice cream sun
dae bar where participants \ can
create their own sundaes.
In addition, local media celebri
ties will compete in a media ice
cream making contest at 1:00 p.m.
in the Zoo’s pavilion. Media rep
resentatives will be creating and
churning their own original ice
cream recipes.
The “Safari” is sponsored by
Pennsylvania’s Dairy Farmers, the
Pennsylvania Dairy Promotion
Program. Mid East United Dairy
Industry Association/F.O. 36
Agency, and the Erie Zoo. Addi
tional co-sponsors include Dairy
Foods of Erie, Meadow Brook
Dairy, and the Joy Cone
Company.
July is National Ice Cream
Month and the festivals are cele
brating Pennsylvania’s significant
contribution to the United States’
dairy industry. Ice cream is an
excellent treat packed with cal
cium, protein, and riboflavin.
Everyone is encouraged to
travel through the “Safari” and
learn more about ice cream.
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