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Early morning phone calls
received here can usually be split
into two categories.
Number one problems with
cattle or equipment. Numbr two
sales/telemarketing calls.
So when the phone rang before
7:30 one morning last week, I
expected to hear a familiar,
employee voice. Instead, the
pleasant female voice asking for
The Farmer immediately switched
my guess to category two.
“He’s not here right now; can I
help you?” I asked, wondering
what sales pitch would be forth
coming.
“This is the State Police,” was
the reply.
Oooohhhhhhh. Not quite sure if
our son was at that moment on the
road or not, or exactly where he
was, my stomach did somersaults.
And the voice continued: “We
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Hey! Folks
If your cows are slipping and falling, it ain't m
machine called a Scabbier that will fix
keep slipping all the time.
We've got service all around this section
of the country, and I have a fellow just
jumping to do your Job mighty fast.
And that ain't all, our prices are right
reasonable, and if you're a tightwad
uie’ll let you do the job yourself if you've
got over 500 square feet. It can save you
right smart a money.
So call me on my nickel at 800-692-0123.
If I’m not by the phone, some real live
person will take your number, and I'll
try to get bach to you real soon. Usually
somebody is awake in this outfit, so you
just call any time day or night. But,
please mind the Lord, and don’t call on
Sunday,
Just one more thing. We fellows make
our living doing this kind of work, and
we’ve got children to feed and bills.
That’s our side of it, but you’ve got such
things too. A lot of people tell us that
this Scabbling saves a whole lot more
than it costs. So go ahead and do it.
It’ll put shoes on everybody’s feet.
have you on our cow list.”
. Instant relief. Or, on second
thought, maybe not.
“Where are there cows out?” I
queried, already envisioning a
bunch of heifers out scarfing grass
along the interstate which slices
across a comer of the farm. Obvi
ously (embarrassingly!), this is
not the first such call we’ve
received.
Late one Friday night a couple
of years ago, I’d been talking with
a fellow dairy producer for a long
time when a voice broke into our
conversation.
The state police were trying to
ge through to us.
Then, too, the youngest was
away and I instantly envisioned
the worst automobile accident
The receiver slammed on our
friends’s poor ear. And our phone
rang immediately.
Be looking to hear from you folks right soon.
Suburban Rentals Inc.
800-692-0123
fault because I have a
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“This is the state police; we
have a report of a cow along Inter
state 83 and believe it may belong
to you.”
The Farmer three-wheeled
down to the highway. Didn’t come
back. And didn’t come back.
About 11:30, I went looking for
some sign, fearfully expecting to
see the flashing lights of police
cars and ambulances. Nothing.
Traffic was flowing normally.
His return momentarily fol
lowed mine. He’d found the esca
pee grazing on the edge of the
right shoulder of the southbound
two lanes and herded her back into
the dry lot. She was a cow we had
just turned dry and moved earlier
in the day and apparently just
wanted to come back to her milk
ing herdmates. Unfortunately, she
headed in the wrong direction for
some reason.
It was not a very restful night.
Visions of what can happen when
a three-quarter-ton cow connects
with a car or large truck traveling
at high speeds haunted my sleep.
Even more potentially disastr
ous was the morning about 10
years ago when two dozen bred
heifers broke through a fence near
the interstate’s exit, which is just a
field or two away from their pas
ture.
Badly disoriented or search
ing for high adventure the
whole bunch trotted up the south
bound entrance ramp and headed
for Baltimore. A northbound driv
er with supreme “cool” and
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superb timing saw what was hap
pening, pulled over and had the
heifers turned around by the time
The Farmer got there.
Thus, when cattle are reported
out anywhere in this neck of the
woods, it is understandable that
we get a call. After another ques
tion or two, it was determined that
these most recent escapees were
carousing around the far side of
our nearest town three miles
All-You-Con-Eot Ice Cream
Syracuse, NY As summer's
heat beats down on us, we long for
relief. A lone tent lumbers on
Empire Court. Anxious dishes
await their destiny with a spoon.
The fairgrounds are abuzz. It's true
eat all the ice cream you want
for two-bucks. It's a bargain. Cool
refreshment at last. ICE CREAM!
For the first time, SCOOPER
BOWL '9l is part of Dairy Day at
the New York State Fair on August
26. Fairgoers can eat all the ice
cream they want for $2 from noon
to 5 p.m. Proceeds will be donated
to Camp Good Days and Special
Times, an organization which
strives to improve the quality of
life for children affected by cancer.
Dairy Day is a traditional tribute
to the New York state dairy indus
try. Festivities begin at 10 a.m.
with a program hosted by Amy
Robbins and Ted Long from Syra
cuse radio station 93Q.
A media milking contest will be
in the Coliseum. Each team mem-
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Lancaster Farming, Saturday, August 17,1991*83
away.
That the group included a bull
and steers clinched it. We have no
steers or a bull in this herd. I pled
innocent this time and offered the
name of another farmer closer to
that area, wishing the good
natured dispatcher more luck than
she’d had with us.
I guess if we have to be on a
police list of any kind, “cows” is
one of the better categories.
Benefits
Charity
ber milks a cow for 60 seconds.
When all members have finished
milking, the team with the most
milk wins!
SCOOPER BOWL '9l, Dairy
Day's main event, begins at noon
in Empire Court. Bring the whole
family for an afternoon of all-you
can-eat ice cream. Ice cream is
being donated by H.P. Hood Inc.,
Borden, Inc., Marble Farms,
Carvel, and Crowley Foods, Inc.
This year's butter sculpture is a
rendition of an old-fashioned ice
cream cart with a young lad
accepting the second scoop of his
double dip cone. Located in the
Dairy Products Building, the
sculpture has been designed and
created by Raymond Mackintosh
of Ontario, Canada.
Milk, the official state beverage,
will be available at the Rainbow
Milk Bar for 25 cents. Prize
winning New York state Cheddar
cheese, lowfat cheese and other
real dairy products will be sold.