Et-Lancastar Farming, Saturday, April 18,1987
HOMETOWN
JH ECONOMICS
■E Btttektr
k Sivii Part Siriis
Editor’s Note: We first heard
this humorist give this speech at
the ADA-nc Annual Meeting in
Syracuse *■.¥. but Walt Buescher
of Pig** ' Forge, Tennessee has
spokei’ -r Pennsylvania a good
many times too. He always gives
farm and agri-business groups the
same message, a message that he
calls “Hometown Economics,” but
which can best be described with
the words, “cnt back or sell.”
Since retirement from Allis-
Chalmers, Buescher has lived in
the Smoky Mountains of Tennessee
where he operates a sales
promotion firm called Grass Roots
Communications. For the last 10
years, he has filled speaking dates
for Ford New Holland all over the
United States. So, here’s Part 3 of 7
Parts.
Last time we discussed why our
exports have gone to pot... strong
dollar, worldwide recession, four
presidential embargos in a row.
As if that isn’t bad enough, we
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have lost domestic markets too.
U.S. NEWS & WORLD REPORT
says we’re not eating the way we
used to. On a per capita basis, in
the last 15 years, we have begun to
eat less bread, potatoes and sugar.
We have cut back on pork and beef.
We have cut back on dairy
products and eggs. The increases
m poultry, fruit and vegetables
doesn’t begin to make up the dif
ference. OK, multiply that loss by
238 million people and that would
make a whale of a difference on the
streets of Lancaster, Pennsylvania
too, wouldn’t it?
What happened to our domestic
markets? Who clobbered us?
First, I say it was price. And
you’re going. to say, “Hey, the USA
farmer produces food for the
smallest percentage of disposable
income of any farmer in the
worlds” You’re right. 14%. In the
USSR, it’s 34%, Japan 23%,
England 19%, India 59% and China
60%. Why then do I say “price?”
When our women folks go down
the supermarket aisle, they see the
price of peas, bread, head lettuce,
milk and pork chops on a daily
basis, don’t they? They only buy
furniture twice in their
lifetime...when they get married
and when the kids leave home, so
they don’t remember what the
price of furniture was last time.
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But they remember the price of
peas and pork chops from
yesterday, don’t they? When those
prices go up, it gets to them. And
then they get to the checkout
counter and those narrow minded
grocers won’t take her Visa card...
they insist on cash. The only place
in town that insists on cash. And
here his gal is trying to save up for
a TV set for the bathroom so she
has to cut back somewhere. She
cuts back on food purchases.
Then we all resist change. Do
you remember when the officials
of lowa Beef got in hot water
because they worked with the
Mafia to get boxed beef into New
York City? The supermarkets and
labor unions resisted change. They
didn’t want less expensive,
nutritious boxed beef in New York
City.
The WALL STREET JOURNAL
reported that Honolulu dairy
farmers are screaming because
there’s milk coming in from Santa
Barbara. Well, if a dairy farmer 10
miles out of Honolulu can’t com
pete with someone 1,500 miles and
5 days away, he had better come
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back to Penn State for a short
course. Right?
In my book, the third and most
important reason for the decline of
food purchases per capita in this
country is the jolly boys and jolly
girls who pass themselves off as
nutrition experts.
Jimmy Carter’s Assistant
Secretary of Agriculture, Carole
Foreman told the world that beef
causes heart trouble and pork
causes cancer. We’re told that fish
is full of mercury. Sugar causes
hypertension. Fruits and
vegetables are acidic... toxic...
more toxicity in a tomato than in
Three Mile Island. Hot coffee and
tea release radon gas. Dairy
products, bread and potatoes make
us fat we’re told and abesity is
deadly. They tell us to get off of our
fatty acids. That doesn’t leave
much, does it? Whatever it leaves,
the fanners poison with pesticides
so USA citizens should not eat,
drink or breathe. Thus saith the
nutritionist!
George Burns is 90+ years old.
He smokes IS cigars a day, drinks
two martinis and avoids fiber in his
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nutrition expert in the country.
When George was asked what his
doctor thought about his diet, he
replied, “My doctor died 27 years
ago.”
To me, this is all a little nutty.
Our neighbor Buford Barnes has a
grandson in Parchment
school...third grade. A psychology
PhD came out from UT and said,
“I would like to test the perception
of the students in this class. If the
USA is borderd on the north by
Canada, on the east by the
Atlantic, on the south by the Gulf of
Mexico and Mexico and on the west
by the Pacific, how old am I?”
Silence.
Then Junior popped up with,
“Mister, you’re 44.” “That’s
right,” the professor proclaimed.
“With the clues I gave you, how
could you tell that I was 44?”
Junior said, “I got a brother Joe
at home who is half nuts...he’s 22.”
We’ve got a whole yard full of
these liberal activists. There are
the “big is bad...small is
beautiful” people. Hie zero growth
»
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