Page Four torial Review Continued . "How do you want your hot dog? Well done or charcoaled?" Council sponsored a picnic at Rumbel's Grove on May 20. Some of the polar bears of Highaeres engaged in swimming at the dam and others, members of the softball team, dunked themselves as they dived for the ball. Ask Joe Kendra about the water. He had an inter esting experience there. Jokes from "Froth" "Look at Marge's swimming suit." "I can't see it. Some fellow has his arm around her." I:=M3 Fran: "You remind me of the ocean." Man: "Wild, romantic, and rest less?" Fran: "No, you make me sick." * * * "Was your friend shocked over the death of his mother-in-law?" "Shocked? He was electrocuted." Ei=l A gal and an automobile are alike. A good paint job conceals the years, but the lines tell the story. EMI= A drunk got on a High St. bus and sat down beside an elderly, white-haired old lady. "You may not know it," said the old lady, "But you're going straight to hell, young man." The drunk jumped to his feet and hollered to the driver, "My, let me off, I'm on the wrong bus." "And this, I suppose, is one of those hideous caricatures you call modern art ?" "Nope, that's just a mirror." * * * Prof: "If you start at a given point on a given figure and travel the en tire distance around it, what will you get ?" Engineer: "Slapped, sir." * * Prof.: "A fool can ask more ques tions than a wise man can answer." : Student: "No wonder so many of us flunk our finals." I== Little dog looking up at a parking meter: "Hell!—Ya gotta pay now!" There was a young lady of Spain Who met dishonor again and again, And again and again and again and Again and again and again and again The baby was awakened from a peaceful slumber. Looking down at his raiment he yelled over to his father, "Did you spill water on my diapers?" "Naw," was the reply. The baby looked puzzled for a moment and then said, "Hmm, must have been an inside job." 1:fl:1 A man caught in a snowdrift look ed up and saw a St. Bernard coming toward him, with the usual keg of whiskey under the dog's chin. "Well," he exclaimed, "Here comes man's best friend—and look at the big dog, too." CM:MI Walking with a friend one day, a professor passed a large fish shop where a fine catch of codfish with mouths open and eyes staring were arranged in a row. The prof suddenly stopped, looked at them, and clutching his friend by the arm, exclaimed: "Heavens! that reminds me—l should be teaching a class." I== At school for the first time, the small boy suddenly started to sob bitterly. "What's the matter, Willie?" ask ed the professor. "I don't like school," sobbed Willie, 'and I've got to stay here until Fin ourteen." SEIDEL THE FLORIST Phone 1424 35 N. Laurel St Hazleton, Pa. HAZLETON COLLEGIAN "Don't cry," snapped the teacher. "I've got to stay hc.re until I'm sixty five." I'MM:I THAT PERSONAL TOUCH "Won't you give a shilling to the Lord ?" asked the Salvation Army lassie. "How auld are ye ?" inquired the Scotsman. "Nineteen, sir." "Ah well, I'm past seventy-five. I'll be seein' Him afore ye, so I'll hand it to Him myself." Longo Plans Wedding (Continued from page 1) Hudson in New York and attended Boston College Graduate School. Af ter leaving the Hazleton Center last year, she accepted a position as facul ty member of Lowell High School in Lowell, Massachusetts. A FRIEND Those Who Went on Before John Laubach of Benton, Pennsylvania, former Freshman Class Presi dent here at Highacres, was elected recently to the presidency of the Asso at the campus at State College. * * * * * .esident of the Phi Lambda Pi fraternity at Jack is a former member of the H. U. C. jack Sipple was ...anklin and Marshall Co, basketball team. GlAl34A:ten*t gr * adua * te Pennsylvania * State College, was N.de a member of the honoraiY fraternity, Phi Beta Kappa. Davy now has with the goveynthent as a psychologist, determining wages to be NuitxtentAil i erical workers. Al Lorenzoni, a civil engineering student at Lehigh University, was accepted as a member of the Phi Beta Kappa. This is an exceptional ac complishment when it is considered that Al is an engineering student, and one requisite for membership is the completion of several courses in the humanities. Al graduates this summer and has accepted a position with the Kelleck Corp., a member of the Atomic Energy Commission. The Daily Collegian, the campus daily, states that Statz Lagonosky is considered to be the main cog on the campus baseball team. Statz was active in sports here at H. U. C. before transferring to the campus. Jimmy Geffert was named Editor-in-chief of the campus year book, "La Vie." Jimmy was a member of the editorial staff of the Hazleton Collegian in his days here at Highacres. June Reinmiller, past editor of the Hazleton Collegian, was given a Journalism award for her scholastic rating in the field of Journalism. Ellis-Kocher, former H. U. C. student, accompanied the soccer team of Penn State to Iran where they met with the Iranian soccer team in an important tussle. Doctor "I'm sorry, son, but I can't prescribe whiskey unless I am convinced you need it." Student "I've got a blind date to take to the Prom. Doctor "How much do you want ?" Papa Robin returned to his nest and announced proudly that he had made a deposit on a new Buick. =MI Some of these jokes aren't jokes at all, and this is one of them, EM:= Man was made before woman to give him time to think of an answer to her first question. The girl customer looked at the saleslady. "Does this lipstick come off easily ?" she asked. "Well," said the saleslady, "Not if you put up a fight." "Just think, Paul tried to put his arms around me four times last night." "What an arm." CMl=l Daniels: What is the name of that book you're reading? Oleksa: What 20,000 women want. Daniels: Let's see if they spell my name right. IM3 13M:=1 Two little girls were leaving Sun day school. One turned to the other and asked, "How far did you get today ?" "I'm studying original sin," the second replied. "Humph," said the first, "I'm past redemption." Friday, June 1, 1951
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers