TIPS for ENGINEERS
A.—Walk fast whether you are going
anywhere or not.
B.—Always talk loudly, especially over
the phone. •
C.—Disregard anyone who walks up to
your desk.
D.—When talking with anyone, observe
the following rules:
I.—Act as they are wasting your valua-
ble time.
2.—lnterrup them often.
3.—Leaf through papers while jhey are
talking, as if you were trying to do
something else.
4.—Always make them repeat everything
with a sharp "What's that?"
s.—Never admit you are wrong.
6.—Never admit anyone else is right.
7.—lf smoking, always direct your smoke
in your visitor's face.
B.—Pay no attention to what your visitor
has to say.
9.—At the end of conversation, tell him
that he shouldn't have bothered you,
refer him to someone else.
10.—When he leaves, swear violently
Be sure to call him a damned fool
This impresses the secretary
1 I.—Last and most important.—Always
frown and scowl. Never give any
one a pleasant word. Try your best
to confuse everyone you come in
contact with, as this leads them to
believe they're wrong, since they
cannot possibly understand you.
LIFE AT THE HUC
By GEORGE DEMSHOCK
Chemistry
Mr. Mattern: What liquid will
never freeze?
"3" Student: Hot water.
Mu
Miss .Garbrick (addressing her
first class) : Are there any of you
musically inclined?
There's one in every crowd: I can
play footnotes on a shoe horn.
Botany
Miss Thomas: When you hear the
fire alarm sound, each of you grab a
microscope before you go down the
fire escape.
History
Dr. Ramsay: What prominent lady
in history gave her all for the peo
ple?
Mike: Lady Godiva
Registration Week
Speaker: Every Freshman has a
purpose here at the HUC, even if it's
only to serve as a horrible example.
The Coffee Shop Around the Corner
Sign over the counter: Don't com
plain about our coffee; some day you
too will be old and weak.
R.O.T.C.
Sgt. Vasco: Upon completion of
two semesters of this training, you
will be expected to spend a two week
bivouac at Cranberry Ball Park, and
take Stockton by surprise without
any casualties. (Without the use of
the shuttle.)
Subtract from the great man all
that he owes to opportunity, all that
he owes to •chance, and all that he
has gained by the wisdom of 'his
friends and the folly of his enemies,
and the rest will seem to be a pigmy.
—C. C. Colton
ANSWERS TO
TRY THIS BRAIN TEASER
1-4; 2-5; 3-9; 4-6; 5-1;
6-3; 7-8; 8-2; 9-10; 10-7.
HAZLETON COLLEGIAN
Sportstuf f
(Continued from page three)
The Alumni game drew a 'good
sized crowd even though there were
not too many HUC students on hand.
Many former HUC 'students home
from various colleges swelled the at
tendance.
HAL YOWLER and (JOHNNY
GUENTHER turned in their usual
efficient job of officiating.
JOHNNY •11APICHELLA, one of
last year's varsity playing with the
Alumni, had one of his rare off-form
nights. Johnny couldn't get the lid
off of the basket as shot after shot
rolled over the rim.
A sound system used for the first
time at home games proved to be a
very valuable asset. Fans found it
easy to follow the score and who did
what.
It is expected that girls basketball
now in a tentative stage will get un
derway soon.
The HUC Jay-Vees were stopped
in their opening game by the Heights
A. C., 38-34. The Heights tekm is
one of the leading contenders for in
tra-mural honors.
Some of those intra-mural frays
resemble football more than basket
ball. HUGH CLOSE was one of the
early casualties, when he sprained
his ankle.
Unfortunately, HUC has a lot of
football players but no football team: -
Former football stars now enrolled
here are: Mike Doddo, Dick Golias,
Joe Apichella, Frank Lucia, Charlie
Quay and many others. At the rate
tea/ rowipg it won't be lonii
111 1 RfrilWOVIIIItt hide football in o
athletic set-up.
Bill Steiner, who is one of our
golfers, is already thinking about
the junior college tournament next
spring.
Jimmy 'Howells, one of Hazleton's
outstanding tennis players keeps in
shape for the spring season by work
ing out at the Y.M.C.A. gym. Jimmy
took singles honors at last year'
tournament.
Dom Lockwood, former student
here, now at the campus, has diverted
his attention from bowling to de
bating.
NORBY LEONARD is probably
the most versatile athlete enrolled at
HUC. Aside from excelling in aquat
ic campetition, he tries his hand at
basketball and tennis. Norby is also
quite an artist with the cuestick.
OSSIE PROKOPIC, who worked
out with the Center varsity for the
past six weeks is now in the starti4
lineup for the Hazleton pros.
We understand that AARON
MARSH is anxiously ilawaiting the
opening of the HUC bowling season.
Aaron finds that bowling is a fascin
ating pastime.
Learned the other day thdt a fe
male basketball circuit will begin
very soon—There are approximatelp
30 girls at HUC, and we think that
there should be five good teams se
lected from that number—What sa;
we stop this chatter until the next
issue?—See you at one of the intra
mural contests.
Well, this is the end until the next
issue. This is Ray Saul pinch-hitting
for Leon Baden, saying so long and
good sports.
The Skirt. Length
By JOHN BAKER
The lowering of the skirt is raising
many an eyebrow in social circles to
day, but from the male viewpoint the
current furor is as pointless as it is
unnecessary. There is good reason
to doubt that women ever dressed to
please their better halves, and today
it is obvious that the recognized
centers of fashion decree the mode
to which the average woman adheres
regardless of her individual contours.
Why the fashions of the drawing
room, the opera and the exclusive
cocktail lounge should be a matter
.of immediate concern to the more
prosaic housewife and stenographer
is a mystery to men. Equally myste
rious is the fact that convenienc - '
comfort and even appearance a-e
sacrificed cheerfully by women w' , -
yearn to be "in style", even thou°'
men are notoriously susceptible to
the female in any disguise.
Fortunately women have long re
alized that no man is impractical
enough to be capable of judging
fashion. As a result all that is ex
pected of any man is unqualified ap
proval of anything and everything
that the lady of his choice elects to
wear. From the fig leaf days of the
modest Eve to the atomic age of
scientifically upholstered garments
thoughtful men have lived in peace
merely by murmuring "adorable"
or "charming" at the appropriate
times. Consequently no man need
concern himself Whether the skirts
go up, come don or remain the
* w
he lehgth. Today's crisis in fash
ions eventually will be resolved by
the women themselves who are com
placently aware that they will remain
desirable to the same degree with or
without "the new look".
Former Center
Student Promoted
Seoul, Korea (delayed) : Tech
nician Fifth Grade Robert Joseph
Sacco of 426 East Broad Street, Ha
zleton, Pa., has been promoted to
Technician Fourth Grade and is now
a staff announcer of Radio Station
WVTP in Seoul.
Sacco entered the Army in Sept.,
1946. Once assigned to. the Armed
Forces Radio Station, his promotions
have occurred in rapid succession,
an excellent example of the opportu
nities available for young men in the
new Regular Army. Sacco is best
known as master of ceremonies of
the "1480 Club" and his other disc
jockey chores.
A graduate of Hazleton Senior
High School and a former student at
Pennsylvania State College, he is the
son of Mr. and Mrs. Frank Sacco of
Hazleton.
immwmmxtet46..etwwwwa
GET YOUR DATE NOW
for the
CHRISTMAS
SEMI - FORMAL
Gala Event
Dec. 18 Altamont Ballroom
ALUMNI NEWS
By GEORGE DEMSHOCK
ANN lifdliftiGH, a student, af sev
eral semesters at HUC, is no* Nen
rolled at, Misericordia .College, Dal
las, Pennsylvania. Miss IVICHugh is
majoring in music and is taking an
active part in the Glee Crab , and.
Orchestra there.
ELEANOR NEAPOLITAN is ma
triculating at Ohio State College of
Chiropody in Cleveland. Miss Neapol
itan spent two semesters here at the
HUC in 1945-46.
In her junior year at the Penn
State Campus, CAROLYN KAROL
NER is very active in the Center,
Rifle, and Swimming Clubs. Miss
Karchner participated in the May
Day Program held at the HUC fast
school year. Her major is music.
NELLIE CHIRICO, who paintect
the outstanding mural, depicting
"The Phases of the Dance", is now
at the Penn State Campus, with art:
as her major. Miss Chirico's mural,
which is displayed in the music lis
tening room, won second prize in a
contest of Mr. Carpenter's art clas
ses.
BETTY KECK, a four semester
student at the HUC, is now majoring
in science at the Penn State Campus.
Miss Keck is one of the many active'
members of the Center Club.
NATALIE BIEDERMAN, al
though spending but one semester
(1945-1946) at the HUC, proved
herself to be one of the most out
standing students in her field. M;
Bieilerman majored in Sociology at
the Penn State Campus, and gradu
ated last summer session, attaining
her B. A. Degree. She accelerated
her course by doing active social
work, dealing with underprivileged
boys, receiving proportionate credits
and will now study for her Master's
Degree.
ELIAS YURICK, who had a four
semester stay at the HUC, and his
brother, ANDREW YURICK, also a
former member of the HUC, are
studying physical therapy at the New
Haven School of Physical Therapy.
This school is one of the foremost of
its kind in the country.
- One of the young ladies in last
year's May Day Program, DORIS
GOLDSWORTHY, is taking quite an
active part on the girls basketball
team at the Penn State Campus.
As students leave the HUC and at
tend other colleges, they are under
surveillance to see how well they
have been prepared. RUTH VON
BERGEN is really doing a bang-up
job at Bloomsburg State Teachers
College, getting five A's (out of five
subjects) in her mid-semester exams.
Miss Von Bergen in patiently wait
ing for an International Relations
Club to get under way at Blooms
burg.
ALEXIS NEAPOLITAN, former
HUC student in 1940-1941, and
graduate of Penn State College in
1943, has been named chairman of
the "All College" semi-formal dance
to be held Christmas night by the
college alumni, at the Hotel Alta
mont Ballroom. Mr. Neapolitan at
present is conducting a successful
grocery business here in Hazleton.