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Vol. V, No. 9
This Summer
Good evening everybody. This is
your traveling reporter reporting his
report. It seems that almost every
member of the student body is going
to be a busy little bee this summer
(let’s hope no one gets stung). All
these fighting songs that have been
blasting away on tne record player ij
the game room seem to have had
great influence on certain big, strong
handsome male students all right
then, they've had a great influence
on certain drips. Messrs. Adkins
Maher, Warfel, and Martini are all
up in the air about this summer —
they're all thinking of becoming fly
ers. George Sholtis is going out to
the campus unless the draft changes
his name to “'fard Bird” Sholtis. Ario
Brennan is going back to nature as
a tree surgeon s assistant. (I could
make a crack about hoping he isn’t
barking up the wrong tree—but I
wont.) “Chuck” Cowell is leaving
the Center for somewhere, sometime
after school closes, where eh expects
to get a job doing something. He was
the only person I talked to who knew
just exactly what he was going to be
doing this summer.
The Center has a certain girl here
now, but it’s not for Long. She’s
going to go down to Maryland near
an army camp somebody should
really warn those poor boys. “Our
boy” Winnett is going to grace the
campus with his presence—he will be
accompanied by his “prevaricatious
ness.” Edmund Pinger, the origina
tor of the new methods of pronunci
ation now known as “Pingerisms,” is
thinking very seriously of continuing
his pencil-pushing activities out on
the campus. Wade Gregory is going
to he a farmer boy and turn to pitch
ing hay instead of woo. In answer to
my query about this summer’s activ
ities Alice Yost replied, quote, I wish
I knew, unquote. You see, she’s still
in a daze. Because of the sugar
shortage Miles Bonner is going to
have to give up his fudge making and
get a job somewhere.
Not all of our students are plan
ning to leave town. Genevieve Swan
koski, Jean De Marco, and Jacqueline
Kistler will all be back at H.U.C.
pursuing their studies or . . . Bob
Holtzclaw is going to spend the sum
mer dating Betty; H.U.C. will be his
sideline.
And where are the faculty going
to be? Probably right here in our
little old frame building, keeping cool
as cucumbers in Rooms Four and
Five. There are rumors that if they
aren’t busy enough with regular stu-
PENN STATE UNDERGR
Coming to a close is another school
year. Because of the accelerated pro
gram adopted by Penn State in the
interests of the national emergency,
tbe Hazleton Undergraduate Center
ends its year on May 8 instead of in
June as usual. But only for a brief
period will classes cease, for on May
18 the merry-go-round starts again.
On that date, too, sophomores regis
ter for the first semester of the new
college year; and on June 8 the fresh
men begin their college work.
As we write tne end to a year
filled with study and laughter, we
wonder if maybe we won t miss the
8 o clooks and bluebooks, the long
hours m the ehem lab, tne attempts
to convince the prof that we really
did see those little squiggies through
the microscope,—and above ail, the
parties; well never forget those
parties!
The social program was a gay one
this year. Roller skating, a revival
from our childhood days, was the
fad—even during the winter when
'we would have enjoyed ice-skating.
We can’t forget the thrills and spills
—nor the open houses which fol- 1
lowed, bringing needed relief to our
constitutions after our mad whirls
round the rink.
A “bang-up” party was the Wild
West shindig. From the number of
seegars (candy) and likker (soda)
consumed, we wonder just how some
buckaroos managed to get home.
Why not have Center bowling
teams —men vs. women? This is not
impractical since the co-eds proved
their ability at the “Y” open house.
Included in the night’s activities were
swimming, ping-pong, pool, volley
ball and basketball. The sophs showed
the frosh how to play that last game.
34 to 21 was the score. After a com
pletely exhausting time, everyone
found the delicious and substantial
refreshments most welcome.
Something new has been added: a
Chem Club. Sounds a bit dull, but
just wait until they’ve shown you
their incendiary bomb demonstration,
and then we’ll ask you for your opin
ion
An open house at the Center
was enlivened by the Chem Club’s
demonstration, and Billy Muir still
can’t see why a bit of powder on a
piece of metal stuck by a hammer
will produce such a loud crash.
dents, they will have an I. E. S. pro
gram; that is, a program of defense
training for recent high school grad
uates. Keep ’em sweating, profs.
WHAT'S N
Another new feature is the base-
Dail aax't board made and played by
the Center students. When the wea
ther keeps our softball players from
practicing outside, they can keep in
training with this game. And don't
let anyone tell you that home runs
are made just for the asking.
A lot of other things happened at
H. U. C. this year. Remember the
exhibit of non-objective paintings?
That gave most of us a new concep
tion of art. Some people talked
learnedly about color harmony and
rhythm of line—while others tried
to figure out how they got “White
Symphony’’ out of the big painting
m i-ioom 4. But it was an experience,
Bess bizarre and more to the taste of
the average students were the sea
scapes and John Henry Newman’s
water colors.
Have you noticed that the Center
is now open every night? And have
you noticed just what goes on after
you leave at 5 o’clock? If you had'
I come in you would have imagined
your watch was fooling you and that
it was really 9 a.m. instead of 9 p.m.;
for you might have seen Mr. Bren
tin holding forth in Spanish or Mr.
Chase with his class in Military Ger
man. But whatever night during the
week you came, you would have
found the ESMDT classes in full
swing. Did you know that almost
400 people registered for these de
fense training classes? H.U.C. is |
doing its part for the war effort,
Most of the H.U.C. students and
three faculty members came to school
at 8 o’clock every Wednesday morn
ing to take the Red Cross first aid
course. If worst comes to worst,
sixty-seven people around here would
know what to do—we hope. We also
hope that those students who would
sling- a man with a broken neck over
their shoulder never find us in that
condition.
Then there was the Time Current
Events Test. Miles Bonner was high
est among the sophomores; George
Seidel among the freshmen, and Mr.
Isenberg took the honors for the
faculty. Most of us were made very
humble by our failure to recognize
more than two or three of the faces
which stared at us and by our com
plete ignorance of the location of
what the editors considered important
places.
About the only time some men en
courage a girl to keep her chin up is
when they want to kiss her.
ATS SEW,
fcgfyyANlA ST AT^i
Chem Prof
JLest&z k'/BFT
Probably the most familiar char
acter in the building is “Doc” Kieft.
For five long years he has been dol
ing out the theories and practice of
Chemistry, Those who have worked
under him have been impressed by
his faithfulness and his patience when
working with students.
Those of us who have become his
friends have only one regret—we
have taken him for granted. Now,
after years of service, he is going to
leave us to be Assistant Professor of
Chemistry at Bueknell University.
Although the Center won’t seem the
same without him, we are very happy
to see him advance.
When asked to give a statement to
the students, he said, “I have always
enjoyed teaching at the Hazleton
Center and Mrs. Kieft and I will miss
the many friends we have made here.
My very best wishes to everyone for
success.”
I am sure that I state the students’
opinion when I offer him best wishes
for success and happiness in his new
position.
ADVICE TO THE LOVELORN
If at first you don’t succeed, try a
little ardor.
The main campus covers 200 acres.
The college valuation is now over
$16,556,000.
Sign on student’s door: If I am
studying- when you enter, wake me
up.”
June, 1942