10 March 31, 2008
By KRIS AUMILLER
Staff Reporter
KRASO 1 B@PSU.EDU
Get outside and smell the fresh
air. Spring is upon us and that
means one thing for me: Baseball
season. Meaning for all of you that
movies aren't exactly my number
one priority at this moment in time
Even though there hasn't been an
issue for a while, I've only made
it to the movies once and bought
one new DVD. I'll make more of
an effort next time around. So,
I'll throw an old favorite off of the
shelf for the third movie.
SEMI -P RO
Will Ferrell, Woody Harrelson, 1
Hour, 30 Minutes
Will Ferrell has always been
known for his special brand of
comedy. Lately, he has been
letting me down. The days of "Old
School" and "Anchorman" seem to
be eluding him with every movie he
makes. However, with the premise
of the movie, and with myself
being a sports guy anci knowing the
'Southland' aims
By MATTHEW SHORTALL
Copy Editor
MCSSO 3@PSU.EDU
Before one picks it up to rent,
"Southland Tales" is quite
interesting, in large part thanks
to the storm of controversy it
generated when it first premiered
at the Cannes Film Festival back in
2006. Though many had high hopes
for "Southland Tales", the black
comedy science fiction hybrid
was universally panned, as many
criticized the plot as sprawling and
nonsensical (more than a few critics
deemed it the worst movie ever to
be presented at Cannes). As a result,
(after much editing) the movie
premiered in November of 2007 in
just 63 theaters, and grossed only
$275, 380 domestically ($356,408
worldwide). Though most critics
continued their relentless assault
Campus Event Calendar:
April 8, 2008
The sth L
9:30 p.m.
Stacks Stage
The hip-hop culture is comprised
of four elements: break dance,
emceeing/rap music, graffiti
and the DJ's on the turntables.
Spoken word, however, consists
of poetry, theatre and a touch of
hip•hop flavor. David Ross (native
son) and Femi Lawal (The Dri
Fish) are members of The sth L,
performance poetry group. They
have opened for international
recording artists such as Musiq
Soulchild, Saul Williams, Ursula
Rucker, Fertile Ground, Jaguar
Wright and KRS-One on numerous
occasions. The sth L are not only
skilled in performance poetry, but
are ,known to host events as well
as their own venues. They have
committed their talents to avidly
THE CAPITAL TIMES
background of the ABA (Sort 0f...),
this seemed can't miss...
Set in 1976, Jackie Moon (Ferrell)
is a singer who uses the profits
from his one hit single "Love Me
Sexy" , which he stole from his
mother after she died, to buy a
basketball team in the American
Basketball Association, the Flint
Tropics (Please tell me you can see
the ridiculous-ness of a team called
the Tropics in Flint, Michigan). By
doing so, he became the owner,
head coach, and starting power
forward. The ABA Commissioner
(David Koechner, "Anchorman")
announces plans to merge with
the NBA, but only four teams
will move to the more established
league. The Tropics, the worst
team in the league, are in danger
of dissolving. In response, Jackie
argues that the teams with the four
best records overall should be
merged into the NBA.
After some arguing, the
Commissioner agrees to accept
Jackie's offer. Now that the
Tropics have somewhat of a shot
to be an NBA franchise, Jackie
trades away the team's washing
machine for Ed Monix, (Harrelson,
"White Men Can't Jump") former
backup point guard for the NBA
Champion Boston Celtics. Soon,
the commissioner reveals that as
well as having a top four record,
the Tropics will also have to
have a stable fan base and have
an attendance of at least 2,000
fans every remaining game of the
season, which sets Moon on a
rampage of marketing that would
put Bud Light to shame.
I really wanted to like it. I really,
really tried. However, it let me
, 4oNyn. "Semi-Pro" has its funny
on "Southland" a handful began to
defend the eccentric little movie,
hailing it as an innovative, original
work of art. Throughout the mess,
one thing was sure: audiences had
to decide for themselves when the
movie was finally released on DVD
on March 18.
"Southland Tales" is still
interesting as
it pops into the
DVD player.
The back of
the case for
the movie
describes it as
"an ensemble
piece set in
the futuristic
landscape of
Los Angeles, as
it stands on the
brink of social,
economic, and
Wood Harris and Amy Poehler star in the lackluster
"Southland Tales"
environmental
introducing creative writing &
dramatic reading to elementary
through high school students.
The sth L pushes the envelope
whenever they display their
spoken word theater productions,
such as Good Fellas, Penniless
and The Bridge Of Ages. Native
Son aka David Ross is a resident
of Baltimore City, a poet and the
author of Speech impediments.
David has been humbly inspiring
audiences through exquisite lyrics
since 1997. This award-winning
artist delivers a captivating
performance - enlightening
listeners on cultural, educational,
family, political, self love, social,
and spiritual issues.
The sth L has a passion for artistic
expression and with their words
intend to inspire the planet in a
positive way.
** Open to Public**
parts just like any other comedy,
however, it doesn't make up for the
a lot of the drab and boring stuff,
such as the side story with Woody
Harrelson that never really gets
explained. Ferrell misses again and
cashes in on another big paycheck.
On a side note, never cast Andre
Benjamin in a main role ever again
He is ok in a side spot, but never in
the spotlight.
RATING:
( ,
(
\';''''-' / )
) ~' = ,
2 out of 5. 1 for its spotty humor
and 1 for the part about the alley-
W: NO
VD REV
Tommy Lee Jones, Javier Bardem 2
Hours, 2 Minutes
I always go see the movie that
wins best picture as soon as I get
the opportunity. Not only that, I am
partial to what the Coen brothers
throw on the big screen. If you
don't think you have seen a movie
of theirs, I know you have. "Fargo,"
disaster". Not only that, the
ensemble cast is intriguingly
eclectic, and consists of Dwayne
"The Rock" Johnson, Seann
William Scott, Kevin Smith, and
Sarah Michelle Gellar, among many
others. It's even written and directed
by Richard Kelly, who created
and helmed the college kid staple
April 10, 2008
"Take Back the Night" Vigil
8:00 p.m.
Vartan Plaza
A History of Take Back The Night
Take Back the Night's roots may lie
in 1877 when women protested the
fear and violence they experienced
in the night-time streets of London,
England. Others believe that the
first rally occurred in 1976 when
women attending the International
Tribunal on Crimes Against Women
lit candles and took to the moonlit
streets of Belgium to denounce the
continuation of violence against
women. While the origins of Take
Back the Night may be disputed,
its impact is undeniable. Since its
inception, thousands of marches
and rallies bearing the name "Take
Back the Night" have taken place
worldwide.
Join Penn State Harrisburg this
"0 Brother, Where Art Thou?," or
"The Big Lebowski," ring a bell?
The film opens with shots of
desolate, wide-open country in
West Texas in June 1980. In a
voiceover, the local sheriff Ed Tom
Bell (Tommy Lee Jones, "Men in
Black") tells of the changing times
as the region becomes increasingly
violent. The antagonist, Anton
Chigurh (Javier Bardem,
"Collateral"), and his unique
weapon, a captive bolt pistol, or
air gun, are introduced as Chigurh
strangles a sheriff's deputy, escapes
custody, and steals a car by using
the bolt pistol to kill the driver.
Meanwhile, Llewelyn (Pronounced
Lou-Ellen) Moss (Josh Brolin
"Grindhouse Planet Terror"),
hunting deer near the Rio Grande
river, comes across a collection of
corpses and one dying Mexican.
Obviously, the aftermath of a drug
deal gone awry. He also finds
two million dollars in a satchel a
short distance from the massacre.
Initially taking the money and
leaving the Mexican to die, Moss
suffers a pang of conscience later
that night and returns with water
for the dying man. Discovered
by returning Mexican gangsters,
this good deed sets off a chase
in which the hunter and hunted
frequently switch roles, as the
gang of Mexicans, Moss, Chigurh,
and Bell chase each other and the
money across the Texas and Mexico
landscapes.
So, I have to be an absolute
student nerd for a minute and say
something (Hopefully professor
Rios is reading this). I was
astounded by the sound in this
movie. There was only about 15
minutes of music in the entire
ow, h
"Donnie Darko"
After the opening credits finally
role, however, the movie begins
to frustrate. The plot begins with
an America in peril after twin
nuclear bomb attacks in El Paso and
Abilene, Texas, two catastrophes
which compel the country to
reinstate the draft in what has been
dubbed as "World War Three".
The country overwhelmingly turns
to the Republican Party (the film,
which more than hints at its political
alignment, shows a quick clip of
two elephants having sex), though
liberal extremist groups (such as
the Neo-Marxists) sprawl up in
the political upheaval. As a result
of the global conflict, America has
lost its connections to foreign oil,
and as a result contracted a German
company to create "Fluid Karma" a
contraption of inexhaustible energy
which is powered by ocean currents
Unforeseen by the engineers, (later
evening to Take Back the Night
**Open to Public**
April 17, 2008
Craft Night
7:00 p.m. 9:00 p.m.
Community Center
You bring the creativity...we will
bring the supplies! A different craft
each month.
** Student ID Required**
April 22, 2008
Spring Luau
12:00 p.m. 2:00 p.m.
Vartan Plaza
Join us in celebrating this
traditional springtime event. Lots
to see and do as we welcome
spring! This year we welcome live
music from "Anthem".
**Open to Campus Community**
ITS
movie and 10 minutes of that was
in the credits. Therefore, the rest
of the movie had to be dealt with
so delicately sound-wise that it
gave me so much respect for the
Coen's that I feel the need to go to
Hollywood and bow to them. Jones
was a perfect cast as the "innocent,"
old sheriff. Bardem came out
of nowhere to play the sadistic
Chigurh to earn his best supprting
actor award.
RATING:
5. Deserved best picture...and there
was a silenced shotgun
Robert Downey Jr, Val Kilmer, 1
Hour, 42 Minutes
A lot of people told me I needed to
see this movie for a while just due
the fact that Val Kilmer ("Batman
Forever") was playing a comedic
role again. For those of you that
don't have HBO or haven't seen his
spot on "Entourage," find someone
who has bought it and borrow
its o
in the movie) "Fluid Karma" causes
the Earth to spiral out of its axis
through space, and as a result the
space-time continuum is damaged.
The audience is then introduced to
Boxer Santaros (The Rock), a movie
superstar with Republican ties, who
inexplicably vanished for three days,
until he reappeared in Nevada with
his memory erased. As he returns
to California, he meets up with
Porn-Star-With-A-Heart-of-Gold
Krysta Now, a well-meaning ditz
who hosts her own talk show which
deals with "issues like abortion,
terrorism, crime, poverty, social
reform, quantum teleportation, teen
horniness, and war".
Whew! A lot of plot for a two
hour movie, everything mentioned
up to this point takes place in the
first five minutes of the film, and is
narrated by demented and disfigured
Iraq War veteran Pilot Abilene,
played by (Tobey Maguire? Jake
April 2008
9:00 p.m.
Student Center
Dance your night away in rhythm
of merengue, salsa, cumbia and
enjoy an authentic Puero Rican
dinner menue! Latin Gala event
is a culmination of PSH's popular
Latin Dance lessons series and it
will feature a demonstration by
instructor Ms. Loida Esbri and her
students, as well as "Grupo Latino"
band performance. True holiday
of Latino culture, rhythms and
flavors!
** Open to Public by reservation**
April 30, 2008
Alexandra McHale,
Comedian
9:30 p.m.
Community Center
Alexandra McHale was thrilled to
make her network debut on NBC's
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BANG
season 1 about the Sherpa.
The movie is narrated by a
small-time crook, Harry Lockhart
(Robert Downey Jr., soon to be
"Iron Man"). He is self-aware and
talks to the audience at various
times through the movie. Harry
finds himself caught up in an
acting audition by mistake when
he is running away from police
after a failed robbery. Posing as an
actor, he is brought to Hollywood
for an audition, where he meets
homosexual private-eye "Gay
Perry" (Kilmer), who is there to
aid Harry in research for his role in
the movie. Harry is introduced to
Hollywood parties and meets his
childhood dream-girl, Harmony
Lane (Michelle Monaghan, "Gone
Baby Gone"), who in fact, back in
high school, had sex with everyone
but Harry. The story sees all three
finding themselves involved
in murder cases similar to the
detective stories (Jonny Gossamer)
which Harry and Harmony grew up
reading.
So, I didn't give much of the
movie away. It's a must see.
Kilmer destroys his role as Gay
Perry. Bottom line, I love when
Val does comedy and he doesn't
do enough of it. Downey plays a
criminal all to well (Well, he has
experience, where is my drum
beat?) Monaghan backs them both
up perfectly to balance out the
trio to make a perfect movie. It's
an all out entertaining movie that
can brighten up anyone's evening
easily.
RATING
)
fk
4 out of 5. Please see this
Gyllenhaal'? Nope.) an unconvincing
Justin Timberlake. In fact, all of
the actors are difficult to believe,
as they all seem to be parodying
themselves (it is as if they are a
bunch of giddy teenagers shooting
their first youtube video).
As the movie limps on, it utterly
disappoints. Bad acting aside, the
dialogue is so ridiculous and the
plot so abstract that it is impossible
to ever grasp an appreciation of the
movie. It seems as if Richard Kelly
bit off more than he could chew;
"Southland Tales" would have been
much better off if it had been given
the time to gestate into a polished
trilogy, instead of crammed into a
ridiculously short timeframe and
budget (around 15 million). For
those who have five bucks to spare
looking for a good train wreck, this
movie fits the bill. Everyone else,
however, should ignore "Southland
Tales".
The Tonight Show with Jay Leno.
She performed on CBS's The
Late Show with Craig Kilborn, as
well as Comedy Central's popular
show, Premium Blend. Alex is a
frequent commentator for VHI,
offering her unique point of view
on shows such as "I love the 80's"
and "Supersecret TV Formulas."
In addition to appearances at clubs,
Alexandra has headlined at over
300 colleges and college students
across the country voted her
`Female Entertainer Of The Year"
two years in a row. After her first
appearance at Montreal's Just For
Laughs Festival, The Hollywood
Reporter cited Alexandra "one to
watch." The San Diego Tribune
has called her "a gifted and bawdy
young stand-up" while Variety has
described her act as "sassy, off
color, but never crude."
**Open to Public**