The Capital Times, November 28, 2005 Culturally Inept; a bi- Oscar Beisert By Oscar Beisert Columnist odblo2@psu.edu Standing in line at the pizza bar in our communist-style campus restaurant, I noticed a difference in the size of PSH's corporate generated—pizza slices versus those of local Harrisburg pizza makers—such as my neighborhood Mercados. In response to my observation, I asked the "pizza slicer"—yes, The need for new classes By Michael Albright Staff Reporter mbal33@psu.edu As a student at this great campus we call the Capital College, I recently, like you, had to schedule my classes for the Spring 'O6 semester. Fun? No. Part of life? Yes. Anyway, I don't know about you, but scheduling courses is particularly stressful for me. Not because it's hard to do, it's as simple as a few mouse clicks on E-lion, but because I stress over it for many reasons and I end up scheduling and rescheduling just about every course there is to offer. I ask myself first, "What classes do I need to take next semester?" Once I have my requirements, good and bad, scheduled and the agony of realizing I need yet another math class out of the way. I ask myself "What classes do I want to take?" I know this as the fun part because I'm a nerd and actually think I'll get enjoyment out of some classes, and I often do. I looked through the schedule of courses for our campus to some dismay. As an IST major I need 12 credits of a foreign language. Having four years of German in high school I figured I'd schedule German. No German at PSH. I scheduled Spanish. I moved on. I need three credits of Kinesiology. We have a huge, multi-million dollar pool, I thought. I'll take swimming or scuba diving. No aquatic courses at PSH. I Diary By A Former PSU Student Guest Reporter captimes@psu.edu I think it's a safe bet to declare that no one in the working world has ever felt more like they were living the movie "Office Space" than I do at this very moment. Let's go back in time a few months (insert wavy dream sequence screen here)...l'm a soon-to-be Penn State Harrisburg grad, and life seems pretty peachy. School is almost over for good, I've got a job lined up, and soon I'm going to be a true-blue career gal (complete with snappy clothes and that mysterious black leather padfolio that everyone carries but never really uses). No more homework, no more crazy schedule, no more paying ridiculous amounts of money for there is a person who simply slices pizza in our cafeteria—as to why, for $.50 cents more, the slices were 50 percent less than other local venues. Posing the question more like a comment, he took it seriously referring me to the employee credited with making the pizza. Repeating my comment, her facial reaction and timid response seemed to represent that I had just exposed myself, which I, after double checking, hadn't. Personally offended, she immediately quoted the student body, alleging that PSH pizza was the best in the area. Clearly, her survey was inaccurate and loyalty to her job in cooperate America was quite noble. My simple comment had gone from inquisitive to inhuman in a matter of seconds. It was almost as though she thought that by questioning the bang I was getting for my buck, I was insulting her efforts in defrosting frozen—which I don't know to be true—pizza, with thick crust and scheduled badminton. All this, combined with our editor, Kate Herr's comments in our last issue about her desire to learn Italian here at PSH, inspired me to write this article. I want to know that I am not alone in these thoughts. So I set out. I was on a mission. We need new classes here at PSH. I thought about the classes we have. I thought about the classes we lack. I thought about the classes I want. More importantly, I thought about the classes we want. So, I sat down at my computer, Mt. Dew in tow, and started making a list. I narrowed this list down and turned it into a poll. So armed with my brand new poll and a pen, I headed to, where else, Stacks. I bugged and bothered 50 of you in-between bites of food, various conversations, and some hardcore studying, to take my poll. Luckily, everyone was more than happy to help when I told them what I was writing about. I was more than pleased and surprised with the reaction of the student body when the idea of new courses was brought up. I was assured that I wasn't alone. The poll I used can basically be broken down into two categories: Foreign Languages and Kinesiology. To me, this is where PSH is lacking. Our current curriculum of general education and major courses are great. We just need more, well, fun classes. of an Underworked Employee books I'll never even crack open. Fast forward to the present time...l miss school! Here's how my day started (for that matter, how every day starts): I woke up at the last possible minute and stared at the ceiling for a while. Do I really have to go? I wonder for a minute where the weird brown spot on my ceiling came from. I look over at my dog. He might lick his own balls and crap in the yard, but I'm jealous of him because he gets to hang out at home today, while I have to go to work. I drive to work and pull into the parking lot next to my building. I pay $ll5 every month to park there..love that. It's 7:51 a.m. I listen to the radio for a few minutes. I'm supposed to be in the office at 8. If I don't waste these few minutes in my car, then little sauce. Evidently, her output is comparable to homemade, reasonably priced, and good sized pizza. I wondered, could this neo-slave for cooperate America really be insulted by a question regarding the size of pizza slices? We all say that honesty is the best policy, but can this be true when a slave is personally insulted by a discrepancy in size of their individual pickings? Do we, in society, really want honesty, or was my question too brutal? After a few moments of fruitless conversation, it became apparent that I had broached papal topic not to be questioned. With a similar nature, a not so comparable incident occurred during a recent conversation with one of my neighbors. Standing in my doorway, she and I conversed on a variety of subjects. During the course of our dialogue, I opined that she was fortunate in only having only one child to rear, which was surely the case, since I think we definitely need more than only Spanish to choose from to fulfill Foreign Language requirements. "Every high school in my area offered German as a language, to not offer it here and force students to start over seems crazy," said Jan Hutwelker, junior. Myself being one of the students forced to start over, I couldn't agree more with Hutwelker. While I realize Spanish is a valuable tool in my field, I have a strong interest in German culture and language that I cannot pursue at this campus. Kinesiology classes, I believe, are also lacking. We have such a great resource in the CUB and a great resource in our Kinesiology instructors to only offer the few classes that we do. We have four racquetball courts in the CUB. Why not have racquetball classes? We have a multi million dollar swimming pool adjacent to the CUB, but who uses it? Why not have swimming classes? Or diving classes? I bet we could even pull off water polo, but we'd have to start off slow. "Swimming, it would depend if they had beginner courses. I wouldn't want to start out in an advanced class," said Pam Hineman, junior. I recently spoke with Mr. Allen Urich, instructor of Kinesiology and Health Education at PSH. He hopes, as well, to broaden the range of Kinesiology classes currently offered. He hopes to offer Personal Self defense and I'll have to spend them sitting in my cubicle staring at the walls, which I will do for the next eight hours anyway. I'd prefer not to start my eight hours of boredom until 8 a.m. on the nose. So I finally go inside and sit down. I turn on my computer, radio, bad attitude. I spend at least five minutes putting on lotion and lip balm on my lips. I know this takes a five-minute chunk of valuable time out of my busy schedule, but I want to be moisturized for the crazy day ahead. Now I officially have nothing to do. Throughout the day, my boss will give me things here and there. I'm pretty sure she thinks they are labor-intensive tasks. I finish them in about 15 minutes total. My day is jam-packed full of important decisions, such as Opinion monthly pontification most of the rearing had been done while in solitude. She then alluded to the fact that her current boyfriend—the father of her eight-year-old child—had taken a much extended trip to "I'm gonna conceive and leave with someone else" land leaving her with full reign over the household until his glorious return. Befuddled as to why this seemingly level headed individual choose to reunite with such a man—"love conquers all" I suppose, I listened attentively with subtle questions that worked to compel further information. Her continued delineation revealed that the said vacation pregnancy led to a younger (half) brother for her only child. However, since returning from his holiday, her boyfriend has failed to interact with his most recent offspring. Thus, her son's sibling is merely a fact on a family tree rather than an occasional cousin-like playmate. This meaning that, as was the fact during convalescence from this man, her co-habitant was not supporting his older child Strength Training, among others in the next year, "However, nothing is finalized yet," said Urich. Among the classes that I listed, I also provided an "Other" column on the poll. I wanted to hear what you had to say. The responses were few, but very interesting and eclectic. Various jokes, like kite flying were listed, but a few caught my attention and I think deserve to be listed in this article. American Sign Language, Advanced Nutrition, Bowling, Japanese Language and Ballroom Dancing were all listed. All of which, I feel would have a strong attendance, based simply on the reactions of students seeing them added on the poll. "Ooh Japanese" was heard many times while students were filling out the poll. With all this said, don't get me wrong. I love this campus and the faculty here is one of a kind. However, I feel a strong need for a revision of the Foreign Language and Kinesiology classes here at PSH. I urge students who feel the same way to make sure your voice is heard. Speak out and speak up. Speak to your student representatives or even e-mail me, and I'll speak for you. I'd love to see some of these classes added to our curriculum here at PSH. With a little work, maybe I'll see you in my German class next year. So until next time, Auf Wiedersehen! choosing between pretzels or chips from the snack machine I ponder important questions, like, "Does anyone ever notice that Britney Spear's mom and Jessica Simpson's mom look eerily alike?" and "If I pretend to pass out, do you think they'd like me spend the rest of the day at the hospital instead of here?" WAIT! The little envelope icon is flashing on my screen. I HAVE AN EMAlL...false alarm. It's spam. At least the folks at the penis enlargement product company think I'm worth corresponding with. Something tells me that my college education was not meant to culminate like this. For now, I'm heading back to msn.com to check out the news and celebrity gossip for the seventh time today... financially. Disgusted, I simply alluded to the obvious prospect—if he isn't paying child support for his summer baby, and didn't even help her during his vacation, then what happens when hiatus crosses their paths again? Surprisingly, after realizing the enormity of my comments lack of couth, she seemed to ponder what I had said without any disdain in my direction. She finally, after seemingly recovering her bearings, thanked me for making such a valid point. While nothing has changed in her life, I wondered why I could attack her boyfriend and personal judgment, but I couldn't bargain for a bigger slice of pizza? Is it possible that we live in a world wherein telling the truth is feared do to an uncertain reaction? Obviously we all fear the possible negative reaction, but does this keep most of us from speaking our minds? And to what level does this probable issue elevate in our lives? For one employee, this film imitates her own professional life When out looking for random play, a whatever I can get, the joys of friendship or, even—God willing, a relationship (Thank you Facebook!), what is so hard about saying or hearing an unconventional —Sex and the City—"l'm just not that into you!"? It seems as though playing uncomfortable games and liblabbing your way through meaning hookups, dating, and relationships are preferred to the moment of truth. Why is it that the one tiny moment wherein reality is revealed has such an overwhelmingly negative reputation? Maybe, in our selfish world, we should consider those able to exchange positive and negative truths as pillars in our community. Does this mean that when someone reacts calm and kindly to rejection, the bearer of bad news should immediately reconsider his or her vote? Why, in all sectors of society, after all of our "advances," are we—as humans unable to express truth? Photo courtesy of Google Images
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