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Got Issues? Fetch advice from Jack and Jill.
Do you have a question for "Jack
and Jill” ? Drop it off in the “Jack
and Jill" box on the door of the
Capital Times office at mom W 341,
in the Capital Times mailbox in the
Student affairs office, or e-mail
your question to us at
captimes@psu.edu. The staff of the
Capital Times, anyone associated
with Penn State or anyone in the
entire universe are not responsible
for these answers.
Q: Dear Jack and Jill:
I am a twenty-six year old fe
male who has been involved in a
relationship for over five years.
My boyfriend and I have dis
cussed getting married, but now
every time I bring up our future,
he avoids me. Should I be con
cerned? I am very committed to
making our relationship work for
a lifetime, but I don’t feel that I
should wait forever. Other than
this “problem” we get along great
and I consider him my best
friend. What should I do: give
him more time or break-up with
him?
-"CONFUSED"
JACK
5 years! And you want to get
married already?! The “problem”
isn’t with your boyfriend, it’s with
you. One of the biggest mistakes
people make is rushing into rela
tionships. You should consider
your boyfriend’s feelings, once he
Scavenger Hunt ?
Three weeks have passed since the mission was
placed before you, and no one has chosen to accept
it, or at least completed it. It cannot be that diffi
cult; Harrisburg is only so big. Its not like we were
sending you on a suicide mission to Brooklyn or
anything.
Maybe the thought of your ugly mug appearing
in this issue of the Cap Times scared you a little.
Not to fear. We ran a photo of Dr. Spanier on the
front page last issue and no one got sick.
This $5O gift certificate to Strawberry Square
lies here in W-341 collecting dust just waiting for
you to claim it. All you need to do is be the first
person to send an email to us with the correct an
swers, and the prize is yours.
Come on folks. What more do we have to do?
Okay, okay. We will even give the winner our park
ing space for the remainder of the semester.
Please, prove us wrong because, at this point, we
have come to the conclusion that there is no hope
for all you apathetic students who could care less
about what takes place here at YOUR university.
feels the time is right you’ll be hear
ing wedding bells. Don’t wait for
things to eventuate, enjoy the ride.
Give him more time, and slow
down!
First of all, understand that Jack
is a Martian. That said, your guy
probably will be ready to get mar
ried in ten more years- to someone
else! You are, for now, the “back
up” girlfriend just in case the “real
thing” never comes along. The
longer you are together, the harder
it is to let go, because you’ve got
all this time invested. You’re wast
ing your time and your life by stay
ing with this guy because “you” are
defined by him. Who are you and
what are you interested in, what do
you like? I’ll bet you don’t know
these things without filtering it
through him, even though you
would say you like the same things
as him, and that’s why you’re to
gether.
This will be very hard, because
this guy is a habit, and habits are
hard to break, but make yourself
your best friend right now, find out
who you are, keep busy and don’t
run back to him in (especially ini
tially) times when you would have
filled it with him. You’ll get confi
dent, comfortable and contented
with your own company. Then,
when you do meet someone to
“settle down” with, it won't be be
cause you don't want to be alone
with yourself, but rather you won't
want to be alone without them, and
vs. versa.
Q: Dear Jack and Jill:
I have been employed at a
doctor’s office for two years, and
really like my job. The problem
is that a male co-worker of mine
never engages in conversation un
less the topic of discussion is
sexual in nature. I just get tired
of him always making insensitive
remarks. He is not directly sexu
ally harassing anyone in the of
fice, but he does make me feel un
comfortable. I also have not
shared my feelings with him.
Should I discuss the situation
with my boss, or just ignore him?
-"TIRED OF HIM"
It sounds like you are passively
avoiding confrontation because you
don’t want him to be “mad” at you,
but inwardly stew, forfeiting hon
est communication. Your co-worker
probably honed his fine art of talk
ing to girls in Jr. High and thinks
he learned a life skill ever since.
Think about what you’d like to say
to him, rehearse it with friends, and
then pick a quiet time at work to
explain to him how his choice of
conversation makes you feel. Then
make a point of introducing non
sexual topics to him when you see
him and ignore the sexual stuff. If
he still doesn’t get it, maybe your
Answers on page 6
ACROSS
1 Fair
5 Ballet step
8 Fears
12 Beers
other co-workers can get together
with you in attemping to “re-pro
gram” his boring routine. Then
again, he may never get it, in which
case you should follow Jack’s ad
vice.
JACK:
The way to get over your discom
fort with your male co-worker is to
Crossword Companion
13 Era
14 Tardy
15 Horse
17 Small hawk
18 Over (poetic)
JILL
19 Said
21 Probe
24 Rotatable disc
25 Anger
26 Openly
30 Baba
31 Husk
32 Fish eggs
33 Vent for release of gas
35 Turner
36 Atilla was their king
37 Iliad author
38 Chasm
41 Heat source
42 Ireland
43 Wire
48 Snow at head of glacier
49 Frost
50 Tides
51 Former Russian emperor
52 Food chewed a second time
53 Edges
DOWN
1 Fuel
2 Altitude (abbr.)
3 Meadow
4 On an incline
5 Two
6 Past
make him feel uncomfortable.
Leave him a Playgirl subscription
on the front desk or spread a rumor
that he wets his sheets. You can also
notify your boss that he looks at
adult Web sites when he should be
working. The goal is simple: re
duce him to a pervert and he will
engage in any topic of discussion
but sexual by nature.
7 Sane
8 Caustic susstance
9 Stay
10 Female
11 Sow
16 Shelter
20 Lofty
21 Snatch
22 Small stream
23 Stew
24 Disputes
26 Speech sound
27 Crowd
28 Sole
29 Leap
31 Avoid
34 Complainer
35 Extended time
37 Color
38 Lease
39 Greek God of War
40 Long live (It.)
41 Winter vehicle
44 Old coin
45 Hitler's average (abbr.)
46 Type of weapon (abbr.)
47 Manuscripts (abbr.)