C.C. Reader
An Injustice
Editor
I think an injustice has occurred. It is
not of the earth shattering variety, like
the shooting of a pope or president, but
of the more everyday kind, which saps
the spirit and moves us to shake our
heads in dismay.
It appears that the SGA has chosen
to spend several thousand dollars next
year for a teletype machine. Something
is amiss when so much money goes
toward a machine which will only repeat
what is said in the 11 daily newspapers
in the Heindel Library.
I think we see an imitation, in the -
SGA, of how our government spends tax
dollars. Mr. Reagan and the Congress
fall all over one another shoving more
money into defense. The Trident sub
marine, longer than the Washington
Monument, is two and one-half years
behind schedule and 35 1 / 2 more expen
sive than expected-with no end in sight.
Our new XM-1 Chrystler-built tanks are
fast, powerful, and cost $2.1 million
apiece. Fine, except that their trans
missions fail and dust clogs the engines,
thus bringing the machines to a halt. Our
soldiers can't read the instructions well
enough to fire or repair their guns.
My club, the Graduate Student
Union, requested $230 for the summer
session: $9O for a picnic for 30 people,
and $9O for two field trips. We broke
down our expenses to the dollar: ground
beef, hot dogs, rolls, etc. The trips,
planned for ten, included gas and tickets.
Also requested was a $5O speaker's fee.
While many other clubs are inactive
during the summer, we took the initia
tive to plan some events. However, the
SGA Treasurer said she didn't think we'
needed all the money.
Well, the school has a wire service
and we have $B6.
I see that our club doesn't rank
amongst the status seekers. We don't
speak the cost-effective lingo, nor can we
flash visions of high-tech grandeur.
Perhaps that is why supply side eco
nomics is so popular. Spend lots on fancy
equipment which often breaks down, and
let everybody else go to the devil. By the
way, Mr. Reagan has a $5O billion deficit
lined up for next year. Oddly enough,
that's just what he complained about:
that we spend beyond our means.
Is the SGA any different?
Maybe it makes a difference where
the money goes: food, which is eaten
right away, or teletype (or guns) which
you can show your friends.
My guess is that we'll have plenty of
news to read while dying from radiation
sickness.
Francis Guidarelli
Secretary Treasurer, G.S.U.
Bye-Bye Capitol
Editor:
June 13 is less than a week away, and
before you know it, the seniors will be
saying good-bye to Capitol Campus.
Most seniors-excluding the apathetic
few-have enjoyed their Capitol Campus
experience. I must say that I have had a
great time, and can partially attribute
that to those great people in Student
Affairs (that's including you too, Lois).
Another reason for "loving it" here is
that I became actively involved while at
Capitol. Students who can't understand
why I feel this way most likely only
attended Capitol in an academic sense,
and have not become "part" of it.
Thank you for a super two years!
Good hick to all my friends (and Jerks).
Letters To The Editor
Bill Bertolet
Time Out!
Editor
The following letter is in response to
a letter which appeared in last week's
C.C. Reader:
Dear Mr. Grunt,
We are taking time out from our
sports page to reply to your Letter to
the Editor which appeared in last week's
issue. Like all journalists, we are pleased
to get responses to our column, whether
they be favorable, opposing, or down
right ridiculous. What does your spoof of
Lou Grant have to do with sports,
anyway? You could have used Oscar
Madison!
First of all, we would like to set the
record straight after a mistake appeared
in our debut column of May 14, 1981.
After sending 3,245 copies to the Uni
versity of Missouri, Temple University,
and the MTM Studios in Minneapolis/St.
Paul, we corrected the fact that the
Nittany Lions will face the Owls instead
of the Tigers. Our source, admittedly
outdated, was a program from the 1980
season. Since the Sports Information
Director at Penn State believes that the
Collegian is the only worthy newspaper
in the Penn State system, we do not
receive any press info regarding Main
Campus athletics. But, Mr. Grunt, since
the Sports Department only issues
19,300 football tickets to students for the
entire season, and the C.C. Reader
circulation is a mere 2,500, how can you
mistake the fact that "all interested Lion
fans" read this publication? Also, re
member that the renovated Beaver
Stadium seats over 80,000 screaming
fans, one of which we're quite sure isn't
you. Why would you care about October
3, since you are obviously an apathetic
athletic supporter of Penn State?
Need we continue? Of course, we
have more, North Star breath! We
suggest that you view the correct films
of the 1979 Sugar Bowl, not porno films,
since you probably watch them 24 hours
a day! Mike Guman, clad in blue and
white and complete with number 24,
carried three consecutive times up the
middle of Alabama's strong goal line
defense. You inadvertently stated that
number 32, Matt Suhey, had the ball
over the white line, yet none of the six
officials on the field nor those ABC
"experts" in the Superdome signaled a
touchdown. Why don't you stick to your
porn and forget about sports!
We also think that it's blasphemous
to believe "that anyone could beat the
North Stars." We merely printed that,
on experience alone, the Islanders would
beat the Minnesota squad. So, Grunt,
check your sources before blowing off
steam. By the way, officials at the
fictitious El Candido Worm Race have
already approved of you being an en
trant in that spectacular event later this
summer. Enjoy!
As to your reference to Bill Neil,
co-editor of this paper, that Mother's
Day joke was in jest. He knew that his
name was mentioned in our column, and
he took the joke in stride. The joke your
mother had when you entered this world
was the fact that the doctor slapped her
instead of your slimy buns. Happy
Belated Mother's Day, Mrs. Grunt!
And finally, the subject of Mr. Harry
H. Moyer comes up again. If you
mentioned his name to anyone on cam
pus, that person would know exactly
who you're talking about, and in most
cases would gladly help in any possible
way. Harry is the kind of guy who would
bend over backwards in any capacity
here on campus. He leads the campus in
activities. By the looks of your letter,
you have had no journalism experience
Monday, June 8, 1981
either. Also, Harry traded in his Lionel
for a Pinto.
It sure was fun hearing your un
worthy opinions. We suggest that any
future correspondence be delivered to
the C.C. Reader office in W-129.
P.S. Make sure you check our recip
ient of the Dummy of the Week Award--
there was no competition.
More From Minnesota
Editor
Your publication is not as bad as I
thought. After all, you published my
letter. Other than that, there- wasn't
much worth reading in your last issue.
But continue to publish my letters and
you're certain to improve.
As for the sports column, I cannot
criticize it too much, since I found it
impossible to read. Each time I looked at
it I started feeling nauseous. But I did
get a little something out of it (besides
sick). The sports editors admitted their
mental inabilities with their statement
about the number of sports "dwindling
to a respectable amount." What's wrong,
guys, are there too many sports for you
to cover? I think we all know the answer
after reading (or trying to read) your
last column. If it weren't for Messrs. Neil
and Caruso deciphering your literary
holocaust it would be impossible for
even the most avid, determined, strong
of mind (not to mention strong of
stomach) C.C. Reader subscriber to read
it.
I see that the sports editors don't
think hockey players are worth the
money that other sports players are.
Well, if anybody deserves the money,
they do. They are out there fighting
(literally) for it every game. Of course, to
those who have probably never played
the game, ignorance can be expected.
Mr. Reider and Mr. Spiegel also
choose to attack another Minnesota
team, the Twins. You refer to Mr.
Griffith, the owner of our Twins, as "the
stingy Scrooge." He may be stingy, but
he has more money than Mr. Reider and
Mr. Spiegel together could count. Which,
come to think of it, probably is too
terribly much.
I thought it was nice of the sports
editors to cover the Indy 500, and I think
auto racing should be mentioned more
often. Also, for the authors (and anyone
else who has never been out of Pennsyl
vania) the speed limit is 55 mph all over
the United States, not just in Pennsyl
vania. One other point of interest:
speeds may not triple 55 on Route 283,
but they certainly double it sometimes.
Unfortunately, I could not continue
any further reading of the column. Too
much in one day is hazardous to one's
health. But I have all summer to read it,
and I'm sure to be back with much more
literary criticism next fall.
Now to get away from these L.A.
newspaper crazies and back to Inter
national Falls, Minnesota, for some
fishing.
P.S. Sports editors, go block a punt!
Kevin Spiegel
Darrell Reider
C.C. Reader Sports Editors
Lou Grunt
The Trth
Lofty Lunacy
Editor
I would like to convey an example of
(in my opinion) an unfair practice em
ployed by the Penn State bureaucracy.
First, some background on my
unique situation. I am currently (since
the beginning of Spring Term) a co-op
student at the Mechanicsburg Naval
Depot. Now, here's where the asinine
ambiguities come in. During Fall and
Winter terms, I had no car here on
campus, but when I got the job I
proceeded to commandeer a car from
home. When I arrived back at school, I
was parking on the street on the side
opposite of the dorm parking lot.
Well, need I add that Capitol
Campus' finest were probably sitting
there watching me park with dollar signs
in their eyes, and their jaws agape in
anticipation of springing onto the scene
to write me a ticket for illegal parking.
When I found the ticket I was perturbed
at myself--mostly for not remembering
to purchase a restricted parking ticket.
But before I went to pay the fine,
there was something I had to do: vote.
Well, there again good old C.C. gave me
the "hot poker up the rectum" treat
ment. It seems that since I am a co-op
student, and not enrolled in classes, I
was ineligible to vote.
So, to summarize all this for you. In
the case of my appeal on the traffic
ticket, the board found that I was
considered a part-time student, so they
denied my appeal. Now the irony: if I am
considered a student by the Police
Department, then why wasn't I allowed
to vote for the people who will be
representing me next Fall and Winter
terms when I return to school after my
co-op? So, in effect, I will be judged
under representatiires who I didn't get
to vote for, but I will still be under their
jurisdiction. The only reason that I can
see for this lofty lunacy is that Penn
State calls me a student or a non-student
when the whim befalls them.
Now, I'm not picking on the retiring
editor, even though he was the chief
justice (and we thank Father Time for
the past tense, no offense intended, I'm
sure), but I think the new co-editors
(Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum) will fill
in nicely in the pursuit of salvaging our
sanity. We'll remember your presence,
Harry (and the accomplishments/scars).
A Small Letter
Editor
As a student of Capitol Campus, I
would like to express my thanks to the
Photo Club for sponsoring this year's
mud wrestling competition. Both con
testants and spectators seemed to have a
great time. I hope the event will be held
again next year
Page 3
John A. Badstibner
alias Fed Up 11
Gary Small