Page 4 A Fatz-i By John G. Harvey Do you ever wonder how some college students find the time to do just about everything? This rare creature, strange as it seems, exists right here at Capitol Campus, in the persona of one John "Johnnie Fatz" Clark. John has, ingeniously, managed to incorporate the lives of SGA Treasurer, WNDR radio personality, athlete, and student into one. How does he do it? John credits much of his success to his idol, Capitol Campus grad and former President of the Young Democrats, Gratz Washenik. It was under the platform of the "Pro Keggar Party," with Washenik as his campaign manager, that John became our SGA Treasurer. According to John, "The time in volved is unreal. The treasurer is prob ably the most important member of the SGA. He puts in more time than the other members combined." While re maining as humble as possible, John doesn't want to sound like he's blowing his own horn, "but if the shoe fits . . With all of the responsibilities that accompany the position of SGA Treas urer, handling the budgets of the campus organizations is the most important. "At the beginning of the year, the treasurer makes out the Budget Request forms, which he hands out to each club president. The presidents then return the forms with all of the expenses listed. Then the Finance Committee, the most important committee of the SGA, will look over the Budget Request forms and the treasurer, being the chair of the After a full day as SGA Treasurer Finance Committee, has the important and Johnnie Fatz, D.J. superstar, John job of overseeing the Committee and Clark still finds time for other activities, making sure that everything is on the up particularly sports. As seen in every and up. The Committee then makes the thing else he does, for John Clark the final decision as far as what should be athlete there is no off season. "In the fall, allotted to each club, and the SGA takes I play golf. Come winter, it's volleyball. I a vote on it. This all occurs in early October." play for the Jerks (John's fraternity), When John is not performing his captained by Jeff Hague, whom I credit "important" duties as SGA Treasurer, for our winning record this year. In the he can be heard at the Capitol Campus spring, I play baseball for the Little radio station, where he becomes the Lions, C.C.'s baseball team." Asked if he famous "Johnnie Fatz," one of WNDR's considered himself a superior athlete, most popular personalities. John explains,"My modesty and humbe- John sees his role as "The Fat Man" ness won't allow me to answer that being of major importance. He explains question. I could answer it, but it would the birth of "Johnnie Fatz" this way: "As be blowing my own horn." T ~ z ~ ~ ~ ~a Interviews will be held 1 day only-Tuesday, May 5 Room W 137 11 A.M., 1 P.M. 4 P.M. Scholarships Available National Co.-Jobs Available Various Locations 10%- 40% OFF HANDISE lIIIMETROPHOTO 23S West Chocolate Ave. ! Hershey, PA 171.33 r - 1 geo ._ . . Johnnie Fatz, I find that 1 can help various causes that I couldn't help as John Clark, student, and John Clark, treasurer. I'm sure everyone has heard of some of the causes I've been fighting for, such as trying to get Sonny and Cher back together at the Hersheypark Arena for a benefit concert. Also, trying to reopen the investigation into Mama Cass Elliot's untimely death. They say she choked on a sandwich. I think there was a little more to it than that. Also, trying to get a school bird for Capitol Campus. There was a good deal of participation. I got some people to write in, and right now the ostrich appears to be the odds-on favorite." When asked what motivates him to champion such causes, John says, "They just come to me while I'm sitting behind the microphone." Johnnie Fatz's causes and charismat ic personality have not gone unnoticed. For example, there is a Johnnie Fatz fan club in existence somewhere on campus. These devotees of the Fat Man adam antly maintain that their hero is a true humanitarian. "I try to accommodate as many people as I can with autographs and personal appearances. But some times it does become wearing, especially when I'm eating my lunch," he says. Ironically, it is lunch that makes Johnnie Fatz the superstar that he is today. "I've been told that one of my lunches could fill a shopping bag. That isn't entirely true, since I don't fill the shopping bag all the way up. That's partly how I got the name Johnnie Fatz, because of my ravenous appetite and my sweet tooth for Zagnut candy bars," explains John. $2,000 For Summer Employment-Full Time 533-6955 PA IN ING REAR Thursday, April 30,1981 • nating Guy 4.110. 4* * • ■* ' 4 John "Johnnie Fatz" Clark performing one of his many duties as SGA Treasurer. READER Photo by Mark W. Clauser Surprising as it may seem, John Clark has found time in his hectic existence to major in business adminis tration. What career plans or goals has John set for himself? "I personally don't think career goals are that important at this stage of my life. For me to have any long range goals would be ridiculous. I have to look at the short term future because I don't have much time left. I could go on and get a Master's Degree and a Doctorate, and then die in a plane crash the day I graduate. What good did it do me? So, I'm looking for a job where early retirement is the main benefit." It is obvious that John, being the superstar that he is, has no problem with ego. Even though his roommates Bill Bertolet, Jeff Hague, and Eric Jeschke share equal popularity on campus, John insists that they all get along just fine. "I don't deny that they get jealous of me at times, because that would be untrue. But I can understand their jealousies, and why they are always groping for the attention that is heaped on me. I just sit down with them and explain how things are, and we get along. They seem to be able to handle my fame a lot better than they did last year. That's really saying something for them. They've really come a long way, and I've been a big part of it." This statement by John prompted comments from his roommates. ' As mentioned earlier, Jeff Hague is the captain of the Jerks volleyball team. Jeff sees himself as one of John's biggest admirers. "Well, I don't discriminate against anyone on any basis. I particu larly don't discriminate against John Clark just because he happens to be a fat The intramural softball team called the Delinquents is off to a slow start this season, but when they're hot they're electric! Coach Deb thinks we should get Wise and start our next stage. Thursday, April 30 Wilmington College 3:30 p.m. Monday, May 4 PSU/Ogontz Campus 3:30 p.m. Wednesday, May 6 at York College of Pa. (DH) 2:00 p.m. Saturday, May 9 at N.J. Institute of Technology (DH)12:oo p.m Monday, May 11 at PSU/Ogontz Campus 3:30 p.m. SPORTS BRIEF C.C. Baseball Schedule boy. I think John Clark is a nice guy, for being a fat boy. I don't want to make it sound like just because he's fat, I have something against him, I really don't. I mean, lots of guys have dreamy bedroom eyes, and adorable chests, but that doesn't make them any better than me. All in all, John's a pretty good guy, although he does have a bit of an ego problem, as well as a weight problem. I'd say he's a good guy, a good treasurer, and a lousy student." Bill Bertolet feels that there are essentially two types of roommates. "Good old big ones, and big old good ones, and John Clark can squeeze into both categories. He's a heck of a room mate. He doesn't clean out the bathroom when he's done, but other than that,.he's a real nice guy." Eric Jeschke is quiet and softspoken. However, he was more than happy to sing the praises of the man who has left a lasting impression on him. "To other people, it's John Clark or Johnnie Fatz Clark, but to me he'll always be Chief Johnnie Clark. He's one of your top shelf men. However, he does have a problem. I'm sure he doesn't know about it. It's a drinking problem, but I don't hold it against him. He's also part American Indian. I think he's really a good person when he's sober, which is hardly ever. He also has bottles all over his room. Every time he opens his drawer, there's a bottle in it. I've really enjoyed rooming with him for two years." When John was asked once again how he finds time to involve himself in so many activities, true to form, he had the answer. "I'm like a river that don't know where it's flowing. I took a wrong turn, and just kept going." C.C. Reader