C.C. Reader
CANDIDATE FOR
SENATOR-AT-LARGE
Catherine Russo
In running for senator-at-large, I am
going to be fair and do the most I can do My objective as your Humanities
Senator is to improve Capitol Campus as
much as I possibly can.
for students. I will also keep the corn
munication lines open between the stu
dents and the SGA so that students can I have a great interest in the opera
voice their opinions. tion of the C.C. Reader and WNDR, and
One of my major objectives is to I believe that a strong media designed to
combat student apathy on campus. I feel provide a solid communications network
that with my enthusiasm and ideas I will is essential to improving our campus.
These media are effective only with
initiating new activities in which they
be better able to serve the students by The
sufficient student participation, and I
can participate. Also, I am currently on a will work hard to promote them and to
tennis team here at Capitol Campus get more students involved in them.
which will compete in the intercollegiate If elected, I feel that I will be able to
team. Along with this, I was a member of help students because I am on campus 24
SGA at Schuylkill Campus for the hours a day, and am therefore familiar
1979-1980 academic year. I feel that I will with the everyday problems of our
be able to do a good job for the students campus. Furthermore, I believe that
and will always be available if my through dedicated work these problems
services are needed. can be solved.
So vote for me--William J. Neil--for
your Senior Humanities Senator in
1981-82. If you have any doubts, just
remember what happened to the people
who didn't vote for George Washington.
They're all dead now.
CANDIDATE FOR
SENATOR-AT-LARGE
Corinne P. Blouin
My name is Corinne Blouin, and I am
running for SGA senator-at-large. Be
fore I came to Capitol Campus, I was an
SGA senator and president at HACC. I
want to join the SGA here because of the
opportunity it provides to affect the
quality and variety of programs offered
to Capitol Campus students. I know it is
important that students put time and
effort into SGA for it to be effective, and
I plan to do that. Ham sure my past SGA
experience will help me in the position
I'm running for.
The platform I intend to base my
campaign on is that the SGA should offer
many services to the students. I think
that many students do not know the
SGA exists, or what it does. Student
Government should provide services to
the student, beyond that, which are
provided through the University.
It is my belief that additional services
could be provided without a great
increase in cost. The type of services I
mean are ones which will save the
student some trouble in daily campus
life. Most of the services would be small
but many of them together will prove
most beneficial.
I plan to serve the students of this
I feel that there is a strong need for campus and always act in their best
interests.
more activities here at Capitol Campus
CANDIDATE FOR
SENATOR-AT-LARGE
Salvatore Sebastiani
that will interest students. We need
social affairs such as intercollegiate CANDIDATE FOR
social events and concerts! Do you have SCIENCE,ENGINEERING
any suggestions?? Let me know! AND TECHNOLOGY
SENATOR
CANDIDATE FOR
ENGINEERING SENATOR
Dilip Patel
If I become a senator, I will work
hard to help students discover the
qualities of the Penn State Capitol
Campus--qualities that make this uni
versity one that prepares students for
work in many different professions,
while at the same time fostering sociabi
lity and friendship. Capitol Campus can
become a part of "Golden Memories" for
its graduates. I want to help make it so.
CANDIDATE FOR
PUBLIC AFFAIRS SENATOR
Bill Barger
As Senior Senator for Public Affairs I
would support improvements in the
Student Center. These include: new
lounge furniture, snack bar run by
students, more events shown on big
screen television, and the possibility of
establishing a pub.
I also support more entertainment on
weekends to end our "Suitcase Campus"
reputation, intercollegiate social events
with Hershey Medical, Elizabethtown,
etc.
As for cultural events, I feel we need
more prestigious speakers, i.e. current
newsmakers.
CANDIDATE FOR
HUMANITIES SENATOR
William J. Neil
CANDIDATE FOR
BUSINESS SENATOR
John Robinson
Jim Hawkins
My goal as senator of Science, En
gineering and Technology is to improve
the social environment at Capitol Cam
pus. My second objective would be to
turn the Student Center into a center of
student activity. Also, I believe in a
movement toward improving the ap
pearance of the campus grounds, to
making them something for all the
students on campus to be proud of.
Finally, I'd like to see an improve
ment in relations between the students
and administration.
I SAVE
- 14 e
(HOWIE
RA?Bil*
Thursday, April 16, 1981
Ask
A Stupid
Question...
Dear Heckle and Jeckle,
I would appreciate the use of your column once again to continue this debate
between Mr. ()owing (spelt rong) and myself. First of all, I would like to extend
my appreciation to Junior for finally giving up the feudal task of transcribing
modern, acceptable language. It's a welcome relief to see you revert back to
"your" normal style of writing. As it seems though, this •style is - very well
accepted by the inferior-minded engineers at Capitol Campus as the definitive
language. The superior-minded portion of engineers has to adjust to the lower
form, just like Business majors.
In reference to your reference of one Mark Phillips (who I won't mention): I
would like to congratulate him on some very nice put-downs. However, I should
like to relay an observation, since he thought it necessary to take the debate away
from him and me (one-on-one) by bringing in others who have had nothing to do
with the previously presented statements. The only conclusion that I can
ascertain is the fact that his mental capacity was unable to cope with a one-on-one
conflict, in which his side was at a slight loss. So, I submit that he was in a state of
hysteria or delirium which forced him to grope for anything damaging, and in
effect starting his own little smear campaign. But, then I considered the source.
So, if ha can't seep this one-on-one--like the formidable Mr. Dallas and myself--he
should be obliged to cease and desist. A debate is no place for amateurs.
Now, Mr. Jay Are, since you think that you have answered the last paper's
question all by your lonesome, perhaps you'll gnaw on this a while: another reason
Business students could have so much time is that they could have zero credits to
the engineers' twelve because they are working on co-op and earning money. I
know this "earning money" is a somewhat new concept to you, Mr. Harr Harr,
since you can always just sell your oil wells for petty cash. I thank you also for
putting me on a pedestal; it is very gratifying.
Finally, my question: Is it necessarily true that less credits mean less
achievement?
P.S.-I thank you two benevolent bunglers again for the use of your column to
carry on the debate. So, until my next rebuttal to my formidable adversary JR, I
bid you gentleman-you too, Dave-a fond adieu.
Dear Larry Canary,
This is a good letter, but the question is for the birds. It is obvious that there is
no parallel between one's achievements and the credits he carries. For proof of
this statement, just compare and contrast (mostly contrast) your elegant
masterpiece to the horrid "messterpiece" submitted by a full-time student, who
shall remain nameless (we'll just mention his initials, okay JR?).
You once again have gunned down the Dallas Cowboy. We're afraid that in this
battle of wits, you're fighting an unarmed man.
P.S.--Although you are not accruing ant credits from Penn State this term, we
certainly have to give you credit for your outstanding journalistic ability.
Gentlemen:
What is mud wrestling and where did the idea originate?
Dear Harry,
In the seventh inning of a hotly contested 2-2 game last season between the
feared New York Mets and the awesome San Diego Padres, a ferocious
thunderstorm began just as slugger Doug Flynn was beaned by the
flamethrowing Gaylord Perry. As every knowledgeable baseball fan knows, the
bitter rivalry between these two teams ranks second to none. Both benches
quickly emptied onto the field as Flynn lay motionless in the batter's box. The
torrential downpour did not dampen the warriors' bloodthirsty spirit, and they
continued to pummel each other for nearly two hours, all the while wallowing in
ankle-deep mud.
Despite the adverse weather conditions, all 3,000 fans remained glued to their
seats; they ate it up. Quickly capitalizing on this erowd-pleaser, a local man
decided to patent this new form of entertainment, and called it mud wrestling.
As you can see, the sport's popularity has risen faster than the Mets' team
earned run average.
Dear Bill & Dave,
During my first term here at Capitol, I ran across a really mean professor, who
shall remain nameless. This professor and I got into a heated argument about
being sick. This professor said that a person could be "almost sick." So my
question to you is: How could a person be "almost sick"? Is that anything like
being "almost pregnint"? •
Dear Haley's,
We're sorry, but we must side with your professor. After reading your
question, we are indeed "almost sick." A few more of your asinine inquiries and
we'll undoubtedly be bed-ridden. I mean, we're talking sick!
Pass the Turns, please.
continued on page 16...
By Bill Neil And Dave Caruso
Sincerely, Fed Up H
- t.ot
Dirty Harry
Haley's M.O