Thursday, January 20,1972 Standard Deviation many swirling energy patterns-'different synaptic transmissions energize-the patterns develope, the communication unending forever in a mind stream drawn blank by ages of the death, but in the darkness a light-drawn towards its mirror, there only a mirror to be found, and the windows of your soul-ageless in beauty, romantic in thought-the day dreams by, is sucked into the ever foreboding night, day an night, light an dark-in the darkness there is light, the likewise for lightness, as thought; the vast darkness unkown and unexplored-some insanity beckons from these reaches; and drawn to them to a mirror-only facing yourself now-the string breaks and the bag of chemicals falls and smashes-a bright cosmic flash takes us to that darkness, and in its many faceted madness stories are to be told, a million carats spinning, each with a tale. Now that we have ascended to the thirteenth star of bhudda, the sun shrinks a little, a little more, until the sun shows no light, no path, the destination now speeds to infinity ... i lack words, my wisdom tells me to pursue ... on the silver steps of Rabalaicia, i’m sinking slower and slower-i’m not walking down these steps, but sinking on an escalator-while i float by many dream paths, the doors to these thoughts and trips is known-and still i must seek out a journey among one door, why must it be a door ... the nob now glows in my naked prescence-with no fear and much curiosity i seek its brass enlightenment~as if, even its touch would end some illusion and enlightenment would pass me through this door, only to find a hallway with many doors, and many more dream quests to be found . . . untangling my selves from sweaty, ganglion orbes, i walk towards my question. Orvath, Segma, and Olivion slip by as i have known them well and journeyed to their innermost secrets-their answers were well suited, and as i answered the answers, i knew my search to yet be endless, but the proper question led me to Kroywen-the magic inquisitor questioned me of my search-asking only of me to lay out myselves in their proper succession to form my unending oneness-my many selves, but only one nature-trying to rise from the chaos of this infinite moment, in a strange mesmerizing delight, he found wisdom in my being-tainting it, beleaguring it, pushing and prying till i had nothing around me . . . voidal pinnacle-i felt in radical juxtaposition with nothing, i was everything as i sped thru the infinite void-movies flamed by me as comets, as i was a part in each-motion became unending as i stood still a moment, just a being . . . wierd entity . . . gasping breathes’-Kioywen heaved a mightly laugh, of which i became endlessly involved in-my life died from me in his mad laughter-his madness encompassed me, life breathe and tears splashed my naked mind . . . wars raged-destructive orders created barricades impeded slightly by unsure nothingness, i raised a tempered thought, only to have it snatched from my rally twilight-beyond madness, i found a knocking at my door-this i knew not to be a flight from my journey, but its smart rapping made me question-the door grew awesome with answers-too soon to be bleeding me-my sanity was rapping away and leaving with answers or my way-shift into trip-i groped and felt a numbness as it sucked life from my being-now positive, i felt this force field drawing me to some form-with some oneness of consciousness release-energies implode-the door slams behind me gone-in the mist and haze, i could only