The Behrend beacon. (Erie, Pa.) 1998-current, December 07, 2010, Image 7

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    he Crave - Vulnerable and Distraction Seeking?
sex columnist
In a moment's notice, your
life can be completely turned
upside down by a major
event. Whether that event be
a death in the family, a failing
grade, or a recent break up,
everyone deals with pain dif
So, here is where my ques
tion arises: when you aren't in
a relationship, is it acceptable
to participate in sexual activi
ties during an emotional time
in someone else's life? Some
people may think of asking a
copy editor
"Absence diminishes me
diocre passions and increases
great ones, as the wind ex
tinguishes candles and fans
-Francois de La Rochefou
But how does one continue
to fuel a fire? How can one
keep their passions strong
with out constant contact? If
sex is the epitome of passion,
then why is the advent of
sex in a relationship its only
It takes strength to open
up ones heart to another and
Put thought into gifts
It's almost Christmas and
that means a gdod amount of
money is going to be thrown
away on meaningless gifts.
People don't put thoughts into
gifts anymore. You buy some
body a new iPod because it's
the new thing - well, take it
a step further, especially if
you're already shelling out
$2OO or more on a new iPod.
A letter from the Editor - last issue's Opinion Page
I would like to take just a moment about the
sex column, and while the content of this arti
cle may not be as entertaining as "The Crave,"
it is something that needs to be addressed.
There has been a mixed reaction from
readers concerning the sex column, as while
some enjoy it, some people also feel it is too
much. The sex column is not meant to get
cheap readership by using shocking material
sex is a legitimate topic for college students.
Executive Board
Editor in Chief:
Connor Sattely
Managing Editor:
Adam Fracassi
Web Editor:
Stephen Fyfitch
person for sex when they are
mentally unstable as taking
advantage of them, and I'd
have to agree in certain situ
For example, is it accept
able to sexually approach a
girl when she has recently
broken up with her boy
friend? We have all seen the
movie scenes when guys de
scribe the ultimate time to
"pounce" on a girl is when
she is weak and vulnerable.
How cruel can you be to see
another human being in emo
tional pain and decide to use
the situation to your advan
Sexual State of Things: It is not a Game
a greater amount of self-con
trol to close off the body. So if
one opens up their heart and
body simultaneously, why do
these kinds of relationships
seem to fail so readily?
My answers to these ques
tions only come out of per
sonal experience; my own
many personal failures to find
love in sex and to not lose it.
Love at the end of the day is
the only great universal com
municator, so sex as it applies
to love is the only taboo topic.
I took a trip out to Cleve
land to visit a friend - we
will call him Kidrobot - and
though finding sex was not
a priority, finding love was.
If there was anything that I
had learned over the years it
Buy them a new iPod loaded
with a play list. A play list
where you took the time to
think about the person, who
they are, what you want to
tell them, or just anything to
personalize it and make it a
special gift from you.
stall writer
You shouldn't even have
to spend that much money. I
don't believe any Christmas
gift should cost more than
twenty dollars. There are ex
ceptions, like buying a gift
opinion editor
Business Manager
Dan Whiteford
Faculty Advisor
Inkyu Kang
Marketing Manager
Mike Wehrle
Torie Craven, our sex columnist, plans to dis
cuss sex and issues concerning sex and col
lege students, in a way that is acceptable for
a newspaper and won't go over the line. Her
column is developing itself, and as long as all
goes as planned, it will continue during the
spring semester.
Still, even when discussing sex, there
is a line, and the last opinion page crossed
that line, specifically with the "text from last
I will not get into how the "text from last
night" got into the paper, but I can say that
Sports Editors:
Elese Merkovsky
Alec Italian
News Editor:
Katie Duffy
Asst. News Editors:
Julie Morrissey
Opinion Editor:
Brandon Boyd
Toby Keller
tage in order to get laid?
What happens if the tables
are turned and the emotional
ly wrecked person comes onto
you? What now? You can't
help that you just happened
to be in the right place at the
right time, when someone
else decided to distract them
selves from their heartache
with some sex, right? That's
where it gets iffy. There's a
thin line between going with
the flow and intentionally ig
noring the right thing to do.
I don't think you can truly
tell with an emotional person
whether their intentions are
was this; finding a substan
tial physical connection is not
one in a million, though find
ing a substantial emotional
connection is. The qualities
and attributes that give way
to a feeling of "like" or "want"
differ from individual to indi
vidual, and yes, physical at
traction always plays a role.
Kidrobot made me laugh;
feel wanted and cared about.
He was as upbeat as I am and
as spontaneous and quirky.
He was a musician, a chef,
and an adult. His worries no
longer resided in the realm of
college drama; he was every
thing I looked for.
Though, after leaving I
found myself forgetting the
very reasons that led me to
for your significant other or
your child, and I'm not say
ing substitute quality just to
save money. I'm saying spend
more time thinking up a gift
that isn't purely material
and has a deeper meaning. I
mean, come on! Wouldn't it
be a lot more fun if everybody
made their friends gifts for
Christmas instead of going
out and buying them that oh
so-classic lotion set or the su
per spectacular gift card that
can be spent anywhere?
The possibilities are end
less! Do you like to paint?
Paint your friend a picture! Do
you enjoy writing? Buy spe
cial stationary and write your
friend a letter! Do you like to
sew? Make your friend a quilt;
it would come in handy on the
cold Erie nights. The bottom
line is you don't have to go
out and spend a ridiculous
amount of money on some
thing for your friends instead
spend a ridiculous amount of
time creating something they
will cherish and remember
for the rest of their lives.
4701 College Drive Erie, PA 16563 Reed Building
Telephone: (814)-898-6488 Fax:(814)-898-6019
Editorial Board
Culture Editor
Shannon Ehrin
Senior Layout
Evan Koser
Showcase Editor:
Nathan Carter
purely inspired by attraction
or rather by an urge to dis
tract themselves from reality
with a few moments of sexual
pleasure. The best thing to
do may be to avoid any sort of
sexual situations with some
one who may not be in the
correct state of mind to make
such a decision.
Personally, I view emo
tional vulnerability parallel to
excessive drunkenness. Even
if they are the one to suggest
the two of you get intimate,
be mature enough to recog
nize that it is not the correct
time to partake in such acts
my travel. There was never a
moment during my trip that
I questioned my motives, till
I left. Once I was away, all I
found myself doing was ques
tioning and feeling insecure
about where I stood in his
eyes and in my own.
I myself am impulsive
and spontaneous, caring and
frank, though I find myself
being none of these things
when my heart is on the line.
The opportunity for sex
is unavoidable at times, but
regardless of avoiding or ac
tually engaging, the hope for
love is also unavoidable. But
what I find now is that sex
as it applies to ones overall
emotional actualizations will
always be ambiguous. Sex is
Children ruin shopping
As a woman, I enjoy shop
ping. I like all types of shop
ping: grocery shopping,
clothes shopping, Christmas
shopping, and it goes on and
on, but there is one thing that
ruins a shopping excursion -
screaming, spoiled children.
I don't hate kids - they may
weird me out - but that's a dif
ferent conversation. It's not
hard to notice these children,
they are literally heard from
a mile away and they get into
all sorts of crap at the stores.
They are running around and
most likely you can hear their
mother hollering at them
from three aisles away. Are
you effing serious!?! Get your
kid under control -- perhaps
try calf-wrangling.
Children who run around
the store like they are on
speed and screaming how
they can't have the newest
num num's that are in the
candy aisle or at the cash reg
ister put your shopping ad-
it was a last minute decision. It is something
that is regrettable and if I could, I would take it
back. As editor-in-chief Connor Sattely put it:
"it was the worst thing in the paper this week."
I completely agree with Connor - it should not
have run, bottom line.
When something like this happens, there
are three options an editor can take: ignore it,
blame it on someone else, or take the blame.
The inappropriate content is not something to
be ignored, and I'm not going to put the blame
on someone else when I'm the one putting the
content on to the page. This is a job I take se-
Copy Editors:
Christian Beondy
Lindsey McCoy
Mike Filitz
and may be better to offer a
nice dinner instead. Offering
words of comfort rather than
a roll around in the sack may
be just what this person may
need. And who knows...may
be your kindness will eventu
ally lead to some sex - when
the time is right.
PS: I want to hear from
you!! Anything specific you
as the readers want to see in
the next article? Something
you're too afraid to let your
roommates catch you re
searching? Let me know!!
Additionally, fellas, I'm cu
rious - what do you find most
the expression of the inex
pressible. One can easily get
lost in it and throw caution to
the wind because it just feels
so damn good.
When sex becomes in
volved, the lines between the
emotional, as it applies to the
physical - and vice versa -
blur. Contemplating this very
phenomenon generates more
questions then it actually an
I can only take everything
in stride. There's no point in
trying to steer any relation
ship in a certain direction, any
attempt to do such will always
result in failure. Sex cannot
be allowed to dictate emo
tions, as much as emotions
cannot be allowed to dictate
ventures at a screeching halt.
They scream, stomp, and hol
ler, wanting the newest choc
olaty goodness or the new
est Barbie or action figure,
and what do the parents do?
No, they don't wrangle them,
that's for damn sure, though
that's what they should do!
No, they give them the frig
gin thing they are going bal
listic over! WHY! Tell me
WHY?! Why on God's green
Earth would you reward your
child for such horrible, non
rewarding behavior?!
They are embarrassing
you as you are getting the
death glare from many by
standers, and you know this
look whether you have gotten
it or you've given the look. It
looks a little something like
the stink eye, but we can call
it the "shut-your-kid-up-be
I don't have kids of my
own, but wouldn't it make
sense to not give the object to
them? I know it's an out there
staff writer
bmb5290 ,, psu edu, be no more than 33(1 ords, and include the
Business Editor: writer's name and phone number. Letters may he edited Mr mn
tent or length at the editor in chiefs discretion.
Arica Christman
The _maim_..oes not publish anom. mous letters to
d Beacon d
axc9Bl( the editor. If students want their letters to be published, they must
include their name.
Photo Editor:
Stephen F'yfitch
Humanities Editor: The Behrend Beacon is editorially independent from the Penn
Alli Heitzenrater State system. The Behrend Beacon Operates partially on Student
a1h53690 Activity Fee. and partially on advertising revenue. It is published
every Tuesday during the school year except for before and during
scheduled vacations, with exceptions for special issues.
Science Editor: The editor-in-chief has the tinal authority on editorial dee]
Ryan Gula slims, including, but not limited to, all columns, editorials. and let -
rgg50290 ters to the editor. Complaints regarding Beacon coverage of school
events should he directed to the editor at editor°
Asst. Photo Editor:
Amanda Snyder
Engineering Editor:
Ryan Frankowski
physically attractive about a
girl? Face? Body? If the latter,
what part?
Send me an e-mail at
thecravepsbo with
your preference and maybe a
little bit of why you prefer that
specific potion of the female
body! Please and Thanks!!
• '-' ll 4 4 , i ir owe r .
- . •
sexual experiences. By allow
ing sex or emotions to dictate
anything, is to allow skewed
perception to impact your life
and psychological stability as
it applies to the two. Sex and
emotions can stand indepen
dently from each other; it is
getting the two to live harmo
niously that creates confusion
and anxiety.
The only thing that I have
gathered that makes any
sense is that love as an emo
tion, as a feeling, is devoid
of actual logic or rationale.
The true beauty of sex as it
plays on the emotions is the
uncertainty. It teaches us that
we have to let go and let it -
whatever it may be - steer it
idea! Wouldn't it be teaching
them a lesson? So, learn the
methods of calf wrangling, or
invest in a lease that in gen
eral makes you look like a
bigger tool than to begin with,
but, hey, people will thank
you for having a screaming
horrible child.
riously, and I have a certain responsibility to
provide you, the reader, with what I feel are
great opinion articles, while presenting them
in a pleasing way. What was put into the paper
during the last edition did not accomplish this,
and for that, I apologize.
I look forward to the spring semester, and
providing the Behrend campus with more
opinions from Behrend students. I aim to im
prove and ensure that inappropriate material
like the "text from last night" does not run on
my page again.
Editorial Policies
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Behrend Beacon unless otherwise indicated
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