Holy Man: Sinfully bad By Jon Stubbs features editor Don’t be misled by the television commercials that advertise Eddie Murphy’s latest movie as a comedy. It’s not. The writers must have tried to create a movie with a comedy and a message, and failed miserably at both. Holy Man stars the loveable neu rotic Jeff Goldblum as Ricky, an ex ecutive at GBSN, the Good Buy Shopping Network. Ricky is a cun ning and ruthless businessman that will stop at nothing to increase sales. Ricky’s problems start when the new president of the station takes over and demands that Ricky increase his sales within two weeks or be terminated. Working along side Ricky is his as sistant Kate, who, of course, soon becomes the desire of his affection. While fixing a flat tire on the berm of a busy Miami highway, Ricky and Kate meet an eccentric spiritual man known simply as G, played by Eddie Murphy. G collapses from a heart palpitation as he is helping the two yuppies, and they immediately rush him to the hospital. As one might guess, G recuperates and is forever indebted to them for saving his life. And. very predictably. G becomes the new star of GSBN and sales have never been better. At any given point in the film, the audience knows what is going to hap pen in twenty minutes. Ricky, the protagonist, is a wealthy bachelor who drives a sporty convertible, has a huge beachfront condo, and has all the women in Miami at his fingertips. It's hard to find sympathy for him when one busty blonde (Kate) turns _ Guaranteed Credit Cards with Cre Up To $ 10,000 Within Day, No Credit, No Job, No Parent Signer, No Security Want VISA & Master Card Credit Cards? ORDER FORM YES! Name Address City- Signature The Beacon : him down. His character is nervous and prissy, which gets very annoying. Holy Man seems to be more of a commercial itself than a form of en tertainment. Plugs for products such as Coca-Cola, Jaguar Automobiles and the omnipresent Adidas are more present in the film than is comedy. G’s character doesn’t seem to ma ture by the end of the movie. All the viewer knows is that he’s a weird guy When Eddie Murphy s not funny, there’s a serious problem with the script. on a spiritual pilgrimage. There’s no insight into his past, which must be a desperate attempt by the writer to make G even more mysterious and unusual. G’s history could have been used to give the audience a taste of plot, so they could remember what real entertainment is like. Eddie Murphy’s tiny bits of comic relief are few and far between throughout the film. And when Eddie Murphy’s not funny, there's a serious problem with the script. This movie was a complete waste of film. The comedy is so dilute and so sparse that one would be more en tertained by sitting on a bus stop bench and just waiting for something to hap pen. Holy Man deserves only a half of a star because Betty White utters the line, “I’ve made love three times today,” in the film. Now that’s funny. no credit • bad credit • no income? Tired of Bein Your source for Police and Safety I want Credit Cards immediately. CRA, PO Box 16662, ATLANTA, Behrend “Live By Matt Buser staff writer Behrend student Trista Rupp has put her life on hold. The question is how long she is willing to do it. Rupp and three others are partici pating in a contest called “Live in it to win it.” If she can stay in a 1998 Volkswagen Beetle the longest, then she will drive it home. “I want it so bad, and I really could use it,” Rupp said of the car she has spent the last 22 days in. “My Jeep has 118,000 miles on it, and it’s ready to die.” Rupp is a 26 year-old senior, and is currently enrolled in five classes totaling fifteen credits. She was able to work out special arrangements with her professors to make up for her not being in class. She has all her syllabi and has class mates helping her. “Nobody, including myself, knew how long this might last. People stop by on the weekends, get my stuff, and type it out for me to turn it in on Monday,” Rupp said. “I hate to miss all those classes, but on the other hand I don’t want to get out.” The contest is being sponsored by Star 104, and is taking place at Tin seltown on upper Peach Street. Star 104’s president, Richard Rambaldo, donated the car and inter viewed the contestants. “Trista is a character. She has a colorful personality, which is good for this situation,” Rambaldo said. “It’s a great car. and it’s a great op portunity for these contestants." Rupp concurred, “It’s loaded. The only thing it doesn’t have is heated seats, and it gets 45 miles to the gal lon! That would be great for hauling my kids around.” Rupp has two children, a three year-old and a five-year old, both girls. She wasn’t sure how they If You Think You Can't Get A Credit Card, Think Again. Features student participates it to win it” contest would handle this experience “I tried to prep them for it. I told them, Tm going to try and win this car,’ but they really didn’t get it at first,” Rupp explained. “I brought them down to see it, and they thought it was cool. “Just when I was worried that this might be psychologically damaging, they come down, say ‘Hi’ and go play the arcade games. I think that they’re alright.” Her mother has been watching her girls, and brings them down daily to visit her. The contestants get one fifteen minute break every three hours, and a half-hour break at eleven at night. Rupp can visit with her family, have a smoke break, and use the bathroom. “You have to pace your drinking. Behrend senior Trista Rupp gives a big smile as she spends her 20th day in photo by Andrea Za ffino a Volkswagen Beetle at Tinseltown Theatres on Peach Street. State Turned Down? Thursduy.October 15, 1998 - The Behrend College Beacon - Page 7 If you drink too much and have to go to the bathroom, you have to wait it out,” Rupp stated Another drawback to the contest is the smell left in the vehicle from an early mishap “It still smells like feet in here,” she said, because she unwittingly brought a pair of shoes a cat had urinated on. Since rules prohibit passing anything in or out of the car, she was stuck with them for three hours. Rupp went on to describe another unpleasant episode. “I ate a couple of bean burritos with extra hot sauce to try and force everyone out of the car. Instead I got real sick, and nobody flinched anyway.” “The worst part about it is just be ing stuck in the car, but I guess that’s the whole point anyway,” she added. GUARANTEED APPROVAL - GA 30321 in Star 104 Rupp said that she gets mixed re actions from people who see them. “Some people say ‘That’s cool, go for it,’ and others say ‘What a waste of time.’ I just ask them what kind of car they drive.” She continued, “Kids are cute. They think we’re starving in here. One girl dropped off Snowcaps for us, and another girl brought in breath mints because she thought we might need them." Rupp and the others rotate seats every night at nine. “The driver’s seat is definitely the most comfort able, because it has the most leg "I certainly hope that's where I’ll be sitting when this is all said and EPOSIT!