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- Police & Safety Report -
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March 24: A complaint of hazing is currently under investigation after
Classified
several reports were made that an unknown number of unclothed female
pledges were playing Red Rover in the apartment quad.
March 24: A complaint of enjoyment by touching is under investigation after
it was reported by a student who lives in the apartments that she had received
sexual advances. This incident is still under investigation.
March 25: Several Police and Safety Officers were given tickets for giving
out tickets instead of fighting real crime on campus.
March 26: A male and female student were were apprehended for visible
public affection Sunday night outside the Reed Building at approximately
11:00 pm. The students were charged with and their parents were called. It is
alleged that the male's mother has since then withdrawn him from school and
the female's schedule is full with dates for the next two weeks. The incident is
still under investigation.
March 27: A complaint of theft is under investigation after it was reported by
a faculty member that someone had taken over $lOO.OO worth of copier paper
from the Student Activities Office. This incident is currently under
investigation.
Colorscopes
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The clothes you wear,
your home furnishings, and
the car you drive all give
clues to your sexual
personality. The key is the
colors you select for all you
possessions. ‘. Most
people claim that they
haven't a favorite, but look
around you, and you'll
notice a pattern, especially
in your clothing and home
decor. The predominant
color for you is the one that
appears most frequently.
It's the one that mirrors
the "sexual you"--- A
panel of psychologists,
speaking at the 1975 Home
Interior Design Forum,
explained the association
between color and sexual
patterns.
RED: People who like red the sack. Women sometimes
tend to be tigers in the sack. are the type who hate to mess
They are easily aroused and their hair. Men are business---
enjoy sex in every way like in their approach to
imaginable. Once the sexual lovemaking. In both sexes
spark is ignited, it mat take purple partners are more
hours to extinguish. When concerned with their
two reds get together, the fulfillment then anyone else's
ensuing erotica could make gratification.
Lady Chatterly blush. Lovers BLACK: Black color
of red tend to be aggressors preferences point to black sex
and weaker colors should be (not necessarily meaning
aware. black partners). These people
YELLOW: If you tend to are the misfits of the sex world
favor yellow, your sexual and seek out each other in
drives are complex and turn kinship. They tend to prefer
toward the adaptable. The perverted sex and are usually
favorite color of homosexuals masochistic or sadistic in
is yellow. But don't panic--not nature. They are moody
everyone who wears yellow is people and often perform at
queer. In most cases the their peak when under stress
person will consent to the or during unhappy times.
stronger partner's desires in a Police psychiatrists claim that
passive manner. You will sex offenders prefer the color
never enjoy sex to the fullest, black. And it is no
but you will never turn down coincidence that the uniform
an invitation from somebody of monsters and teenage
you enjoy or admire. gangs is black attire.
4 .4 tio
PINK: Persons who like
pink show a reluctance to
mature in sexual matters:
women tend to tease, to
promise more than they
intend to deliver. In some
cases they flaunt their
femininity—but because they
secretly hate men. A great
percentage of prostitutes
boast entire wardrobes in
pink. Men who like pink are
the philanderers and flirts.
They are the type who will
make three dates for the same
evening and not keep one,
preferring to pick up some
dish in some bar instead.
Women whose husbands like
pink should keep a secret
nest egg.
PURPLE: Lovers of
purple frequently consider
themselves to be too
sophisticated for a fun romp in
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GREEN: Those who
prefer green are fresh an
innocent in their approach to
sex. Women who love green
will always make love like
virgins all their life. And a man
may always be a trifle clumsy
and awkward but in a charming
and endearing sort of of way.
Green lovers are gentle, but
not passionate. If chosen as a
mate, one will never need
worry about infidelity.
ORANGE: Lovers of the
color orange lean toward
sexual fantasies. The sex act
is regarded as a dramatic one
act play in which they are the
star. Fore play is as important
as the act of love. They
whisper sweet nothings,
meaningless dialogue; they
feel it is their image. Orange
people often do not
experience orgasm - - but they
put on a dam good act. Man
tend to pull their partner's hair,
and women leave red welts on
the sex partner's back.
BROWN: if you love
brown, you're a real treasure
for the right mate. Brown
lovers tend to be warm and
deep, sensitive to the needs
and desires of their partners.
Sex is a 24 hour a day thing.
Where you can't say love
you" often enough.
Snuggling by the fire, walking
in the rain or catching
snowflakes on their tongue is
a turn-on to a lover of brown.
They need lots of time and
privacy to make love. But their
emotions are such that one
harsh word could end the
affair.
GREY: The color grey is
preferred by people who are
indecisive. They can't get
excited about anything --
including color -- so they
choose a noncommittal
shade. Men who prefer grey
4044 %V
LOST & FOUND:
Lost: My mind. Call 898-
6495. Possible reward.
Lost: Virginity; If found,
please call 898-SEXY.
Found: Male apparel in my
room If it's yours, call 898-
7017.
Lost: In search of my
dictionary. Call
immediately; large reward. IN SEARCH OF:
Call 898-6488; ask for
Michelle
Found: A key that opens
the darkroom door. If its
yours, stop by the
Collegian Office.
FOR SALE:
One bachelors degree in
Communications; can't find
a job. Call 898-4210.
Overpriced food at inflated
cost. Anyone interested,
inquire at the Wintergreen
Cafe.
My Visa card - cannot pay
the bills. Canto make a
deal: 898-POOR.
An orange shirt and green
pants. Makes great
pumpkin outfit for
Halloween. Call Al at
Housing, 898-6161.
EMPLOYMENT:
If you've looked
everywhere else and
desperately need money,
give Dobbins a call. We're
looking for poor students at
the end of their chain and
• •f li • : .
look at sex as a way of
relieving tension -- but
nothing more, nothing less.
It's wham, barn, thank you
ma'am. Women don't make
love, they have intercourse.
And for one of two reasons
only: to accommodate their
mate, or to become pregnant.
They count the cracks in the
bedroom plaster until the sex
act is over with and done. But
when teamed with another
color, the grey spouse
considers the other's infidelity
a blessing. When a grey
marries another grey, the
marriage is made in heaven.
BLUE: Lovers of blue are
wonderful sex partners. They
are sinners, affectionate and
sensitive to their partner's
needs. They consider love
making a fine art and their
approach is elegant. Men who
love blue are like concert
pianists, delicately ravaging
• 4r . di
Twelve month calendar wit
no legal holidays...stop by
the Registrars office and
pick up your copy now!
WORK STUDY: Summer
work study positions
available in the athletic
office. Will pay for you to
play. Positions available in
soccer, basketball and
volleyball. Inquire within.
Bring proof of citizenship.
That spedal kind of man. If
you're him, call me at 898-
7023.
HAZ MAT CREW needed
for small cleaning job.
Inquire within at Glenhill
Farmhouse. Bring bathing
suit.
A sense of humor - will pay
large sum: 898-6797.
BEER RUN DRIVER: Driv
must have own vehicle and
be willing to make multiple
beer runs a night. Should
expect overtime on
weekends. Twenty one or
older preferably.
SWF looking for married
older rich man. Wiling to
have meaningless
relationship or one wild
night of love.
DO YOU KNOW HOW TO
USE A SHOVEL? Due to
spring drainage problems,
Behrend maintenance is
looking for willing students
to dig drainage ditches
along sidewalks campus
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their partner like they would
play a baby grand. Women in
the blue category enjoy sex to
the fullest. They are exciting
partners but their passion may
be compared to a tidal wave
rather than fiery aggression.
Both women and men enjoy
fore play and the aftermath of
lovemaking, as much as the
sex act itself. In marriage a
blue person is a wonderful
mate -- never seeking outside
interests.
WHITE: If a person is
infatuated with white, sex
often seems filthy. These
people are puritanical in
nature. French kissing is
obscene and to make love in
the daylight is unheard of.
Women who love white will
undress beneath the covers.
Men will shower before and
after the sex act. These
people will use pet names for
their genitals.
4444.