RAILROAD TIME TABLES PENN'A U. It. IT AST. WEST 7.13 A. M. #.H A. M. 10.17 " fiat P. M. *.* l P. M. 4.53 " e.O» » .51 " SUNDAYS. 10.17 A. M.l 53 P. M. l>. 1.. p. in. Telephone 14iJt>. THE VERDICT. LI Hiag Chang and the allies will try to talk the Chinese situation to a finish.— Philadelphia Ledger. A woman in Ohio has secured a license to run an engine. Running things is the specialty of the sex just now. and there is no good reason discernible why en gines should be excepted from the gener al lot. —Detroit Free Press. Russia is to adopt the metric system, and when she has done this only the United States and the United Kingdom, among nations of any commercial impor tance, will adhere to their ancient and complicated systems of weights and measures. —New York Journal of Com merce. The Chicago school board is short of money and talks of closing the kindergar tens. This would he starting economy at the wrong end. The upper ten should U> cut off before the lower ten thousand. The public shools should he conducted for the greatest good of the greatest num ber.—Milwaukee Wisconsin. Mr. Goldwin Smith thinks that suicide Is on the increase, and he has a remedy for It. That remedy Is marriage. If a man lives by himself, he will develop an unwelcome habit of introspection and so become despondent. The married man, on the other hand, is busy and cheerful, or if he is not he ought to be.—Galveston News. American railroad equipments are sup planting the French articles on the new underground line in Paris. It appears that the engineer who built the line and who spent six years in this country inves tigating methods of electric traction Is convinced of the superiority of American made appliance*. This Is another victo ry for American workmanship.—Buffalo Express. OOM PAUL. Oom Paul might have been another George Washington if things had gone differently.--Philadelphia Ledger. Oom Paul finds considerable pertinence in the familiar inquiry what ex-presi dents shall do.—Pittsburg Dispatch. Kruger wo;:Id have held a more honor ed place in history if. after plunging nil people into war, he had remained to share with them the fortunes of defeat. — Louisville Courier-Journal. Mr. Kruger's first "trek" marked tho foundation of the Transvaal, and his last marks its fall. More than any other rul er or statesman of his time, he has been able to say, "The state, it is I."—New York Tribune. THE AIRSHIP. Given years of constant improvement and increased knowledge of aerial navi gation, and the Zeppelin airship may yet prove to be the forerunner of as great a fleet of airships as those which now nav igate the waters of the earth. —Philadel- phia Inquirer. That Count Zeppelin has constructed an airship capable of being steered for five minutes against the wind is an im mense step forward. The dream of a rentury that men should some day trav erse the air as easily as they now trav erse land and sea may be within meas urable distance of realization. —New York World. It is not profitable to keep a colony that has a defective queen. Decrease the size of the entrance to th« hives when the honey season is over. A cell properly developed and of full sise is sure to produce a well developed queen. In selecting the queen use one that is very prolific. The best looking is not al ways the best. More bees are lost on aoount of bad food or none at all during the winter than from any other cause. All queens with defective wings, so that they cannot fly, should IHJ destroyed, as they will prove drone layers. If bees are in proper condition in the fall when placed in winter quarters, very little work during the winter will be re quired. Make a good entrance to every colony of bees. A good plan to do this is to spread sawdust in front until it is level with the entrance. It is important to arrange the brood nest in all the colonies before cold weath er sets in. The cluster of bees should oc cupy the center of tl hive, with the hon ey around them.—St. Louis Republic. Spain has only 11,500 miles of railway, while France, of about the same urea, has 36,000. The street railway companies of Alle ghany, Pa., are required by ordinance to equip their cars with jacks for use in lifting the vehicles from the bodies of persons who may have been run down ■nd pinned under the wheels. A member of the board of general di rectors of the Royal Saxon railways has invented a new device for the cousump tiou of smoke given off by locomotives, lie claims that it is almost perfect, whether the locomotive is moving or atauding still. A locomotive using this fiew invention and being worked to its .utmost capacity saves in one month 28,- t»00 pounds of coal. To equip a locomo tive with the device costs about $25. Spread Like Wilkfire. When things art 4 ' 'the best" they be come ' the best selling." Abraham Hare, a leading druggist, of Belleville, 0., writes; "Electric Bitters are the best selling bitters I have handled in 20 years. Yon know why? Most diseases ! begin in disorders of stomach, liver kid- 1 neys, bowels, blood and nerves. Elec tric Bitters tones up the stomach, regu lates liver, kidneys and bowels purifies the blood, sfr 'ngtheus the nerves, henae cures multitudes of maladies. It builds np the entire system. Puts new life and vigor into any weak, sickly, run down man or woman. Price 50 cents. Sold by Failles & Co.. druggist. HARNESS_WPOOTBALL Players Using It to an Excess This Season. SOME OF THE NEW DEVICES. Sole Leathrr Headpiece* Are Very Popular—Siew Wrlut Splint t»ed at Harvard—Crusade Started to Pro hibit the Sen lieadKeur. A crusade has been started by the Yale football authorities against the excessive use of harness, which may result in a rule prohibiting the players from wearing the new style of head gear consisting of hard caps made of sole leather, as well as stiff pads of the same material worn on the shoulders, elbows and knees. Lately the coaches of a number of teams have been rig "BCOTTY" M ACM ASTERS. [Harvard'* athletic trainer.] glng np their men with these new sole leather helmets, hard leather saddles on the shoulders, stiff pads on the el bows, hips and knees, together with metallic masks for their faces. It has been charged that these things have been brought Into use not so much to provide protection for the wearers as to inflict injury upon opponents, and there Is a general cry that there have been more Injuries and bruises this fall because of this armor than ever before. An investigation shows that these caps are so hard that when they come in contact with a man's body his wind is invariably knocked out, and when they touch the hands, faces or arms the skin Is often torn off. Yale was the first to discover this fault. Some of her men were wearing these caps In practice, and so many players on the "scrub" team were cut up and Injured by them that they were prohibited. Players this fall as a rule have been wearing more armor than ever before. Some of them wish to attract attention or be regarded by their opponents as "terrors," yet there are many stars who never wear such devices and take chances of having broken noses, torn ears and scalp wounds. A rule that barred the use of football armor would be welcomed. It would make it impos sible to harness up cripples who other wise would be unable to indulge in hard games, and only sound players would be Been In their places. The cru sade begun at New Haven has caused a great deal of comment at the other big universities. Coach Woodruff of Pennsylvania is heartily in accord with Yule's ideas. He says headgear and harness should be barred and alludes to rule 27 (a), which reads: "No one having projecting nails or Iron plates on his shoes or wearing on his person any metallic or hard sub stance that In the judgment of the um pire Is liable to injure an opposing par ty shall be allowed to play In a match." Woodruff says this rule covers the point at issue and legally excludes the hard leather caps and pads. He de clares that the harness should be de fensive and not offensive—that Is to say, a convex plate padded on its outer side so as not to injure an opponent is quite permissible for use on the thigh, which is frequently struck by the shoulder and head of a tuckler. But, Woodruff declares, the placing of hard armor on the elbows, knees and head le not within the spirit of the rule, as these parts of the body are used in at tack, and the placing of hard sub stances upon them can only be con strued as a deliberate attempt to Injure opponents. "Scotty" Mac-Masters of Harvard, with his usuul alertness nnd keenness, has devised a new article of football ar mor. This Is a wrist splint. It Is used to keep the men from straining their wrists when pushing against oppo nents, as they do many times. Har vard has had many men laid out In this way and got this scheme up to prevent the continuance of the Injuries. It Is worn now on the Harvard principle that an ounce of prevention Is worth a pound of cure. There has been a general decrease In the weight of nrroor used at Harvard this year. The shoulder pads have been mnde smaller and with alumini um In them to make them strong, but light. A full fledged Harvard man now wears ankle supporters, thigh guards made of pads and aluminium plates which fit the front of the thigh nnd have prevented all "poops," knee and hip pads, stomach bands, shoulder pads, elbow pads, a heavy shoulder guard, wrist guards, a headpiece made of leather which protects the top of the nead, the ears and a nose piece attacn ed which protects the face. At Harvard helmets are regarded as Indispensable, although Coach Dou cstte thinks that the men In the rush line do not need them. Cameron Forbes and Ben Dlbblee, Harvard's leading coaches, say that a good head piece gives to a man increased confi dence and tends to make him strike an opponent with his head Instead of his shoulder in bucking the line. Then, too, a good pneumatic headpiece dis tributes the force of a blow over the entire head instead of centering It on one spot. The Princeton coaches, on the other hand, favor all kinds of hel mets and harness. They argue that headpieces lirp nprocmrv beemise the Millions Given Away. It islcertainly gratifying to the public to know of one concern which is not afraid to be generous. The proprietors ! of Dr. King's New Discovery for Con sumption, Coughs and Colds, have given away over ten million trial bottles and have the satisfaction of knowing it has cured thousands of hopeless cases. As thma, Bronchitis, La Grippe and all Throat, Chest and Lung disease are "nrely cured by it. (-all on Panle's & Co., Druggist, and get a free trial bottle. Regular size 50c and SI.OO. Every 1m it tlegnaranteed. injuries to the head are generally of a far more lasting and serious nature than those received in other parts of the body. They say, too, that modern helmets are constructed to protect the ears. The Princeton men admit, how ever, that the thing is being overdone. Other prominent coaches who have been Interviewed agree that it would be a good move to make the rule more explicit and to enforce it with strict ness. The good players in football are the ones usually to escape injury. It is al so true that the men who are not afraid of being hurt are seldom on the hospital list. Players who feel timid about taking chances in desperate scrimmages are generally bunged up at one time or another. Men like Hare and McCracken of Pennsylvania, Wright of Columbia. Brown and Hale of Yale, Lawrence and Kendall of Har vard, Pell and Iteiter of Princeton and other such players who put up a fierce argument at all stages can be depend ed upon togo through a whole season without serious mishaps. Courage cou pled with strength and agility pre vents accidents, while timidity and hesitancy often cause fatalities. Any football expert who knows what he is talking about will say that the men who die from injuries received on the gridiron are either ignorant of the game or are lacking in gameness and physical fitness. AN ATTRACTIVE ACTRESS. Mlaa Ada Dwjer, Who In Now Play ing In "I.ont Itlver." Miss Ada Dwyer, although an at tractive and pretty young woman, is cast for the character of Grandma Gates in the play "Lost River," which is now making such a hit in New York. Miss Dwyer is making a name for her f : pii Photo by Baker, Columbus, O. MISS ADA DWYER. self as a character actress. She is re markable among pretty actresses from the fact that she does not object to making herself look unattractive on the stage when the exigencies of the part require her to do so. Ail Eloquent Amwer, A colored citizen gave a justice of the peace a big, fat possum as a wedding fee. Meeting him a year after his marriage the justice said: "Well, Jim, how do you like married life?" "Well, suh," was the reply, "all 1 kin eay is I wish Pd eat dat possum."—At lanta Constitution. Couldn't Take a Hint. "Ah, good morning!" said Dunn, meet ing Owens on the street. "I expected to call up at your place about that little account you"— "Oh," replied Owens, "it's just as easy for me to call down." "Very well, when will you call down?" "When? I consider this a call down. Do you want me to make it stronger'/" Philadelphia Press. Tlie Renewal of Trouble. My darling's brow U wrinkled now. And sadness weighs her down. The smiles of yore 1 see no more; She wears a constant frown t Her whist club's in full blast again. Her head is full of rules, And, somehow, all her partners play Like silly little fools! The prizes she would like to win Her rivals take away. And "if" and eke "it might have been" Are things 1 hear her say. My darling's brow Is wrinkled now. And often she's as glum And cross with me As she can be; The card club days have romp I —Chicago Times- Herald. CHECKERS AND CHESS. Checker Problem No. 605. White—s (king), 10, 23 (king). se\ ' : ® i i Wl m iff ¥""- ¥ 1 EJ ® -j i . use ■ j! tA Wm} U: J %*£ ® Ui, r ' -*■ - -- i BlsrU i .'i. .:\i Umg). Blark to play n ' i Chess Hrobl.-i , i Mack. I ! ~ II ■ v. J imm n ■ ■js ri is j ; % ( :j _ : i •: ; ' t / White. White to play and male in two inov i. SOLUTION*. Checker problem No. GUI: While. Hlark. 1..20 to 11 1,. 1 to 8 2. .28 to 24 2.. oto » 8. .24 to 20 3.. 0 to 13 4..21 to 17 4..14 to 21 6. .22 to IS 5. .21 to 25 6..18 to 15 fi .10 to 14 7..15 to 10 7..25 to 30 8..10 to 3 8..30 to t 2O 9. .10 to 11 Drawn Chess problem No. fIW: White. Key move, it to K R 1 When You Get a Headache dont' waste a minute but goto your druggist and get a box of Kranse's Headache Capsules. They will prevent pain, even though your skull were cracked. They are harmless, too. Read thegnarantee. Price 25c. Sold by Ross man & Son's Pharmacy. PEN, PENCIL AND BRUSH. James Whitcomb Riley, the poet, is considering a proposition for delivering several lectures ia England this winter. Walter Crane, the artist, has just giv en two lectures on art in Budapest in connection with r.n exhibition of his work in the art museum of that city. When Richard Le Gallienue arrived in New York from Europe recently, he was so changed in appearance that few famil iar with his face knew him. While in Europe he cut the long, flowing black hair which has always distinguished him in the past and most deeply impressed his face upon the memory. F. Hopkinson Smith has just returned i from abroad. He says:"l went over in June for my annual jaunt. This time I painted on the Thames, in Holland and in Venice. The Thames is a new subject for me. The greater part of the work which I did on the Thames was doue at Cokeham, an hour out of London. This is one of the prettiest parts of the river." The father of M. Edmond Rostand, the author of "L'Aiglon." is also a pnet who combines versifying with clever articles on social economy in French reviews. lie is also a member of the Institute. When the son was raised to the oftieership of the Legion of Honor, he implored the government to grant the same distinction to "Le Pere Cyrano." as M. Eugene Ro stand is playfully called by his friends. THE DOMINIE. Rev. J. C. Brooks, brother of the late Bishop Brooks, is at work upon a collec tion of the bishop's letters. The Episcopalians of the Milwaukee (Wis.) diocese favor strongly the appoint ment of a coadjutor bishop as assistant to Bishop Isaac L. Nicholson. The archbishop of Sens will be author ised to lend the pallium of Thomas a Becket in the chapter house treasury for the opening of the new Roman cathedral at Westminster. The ring and crozier of Becket are already in Cardinal Vaugh an's possession. Rev. William E. Mallalieu, Method'st Episcopal bishop of Massachusetts, re cently delivered an address. In the course of which he said that he hoped his hear ers would not read such books as "David Harum," which "reeked of rum, profan ity and tobacco." The new Methodist college to be built in Rome is to have its main building named Craudon hall in honor of Mrs. F\ P. Crandon of Evanston, Ills., who as corresponding secretary of the northwest ern branch of the Methodist Women's Foreign Missionary society did much to ward raising the money for the college. HOUSEHOLD HINTS. Use borax or ammonia instead of soap in washing blankets. This will keep them soft and help to preserve the brightness of the colored stripes. The wise woman does not attempt to save washing by using clothing, towels, napkins, etc.. till they are very dirty. The extra rubbing they require balances the work saved and proves poor economy because of the additional wear on them. Blood stains are about as difficult as any tot out. Here starch comes into use. Make a thin pnste and spread on the stain. Leave it to dry. Then brush off. Generally the stain will go with the starch. The worst stains, however, will require several applications of the starch. TOWN TOPICS. The Philadelphia street railways are to !i i- smoking cars. Better make it sleeping cars.—Louisville Courier-Jour nal. Work is to be rushed on the Chicago postoffice, and our children's children, if not our children themselves, may live to see it completed.—Chicago Post. The Sedalia street railway will inau gurate a 3 cent fare the Ist of November ns an experiment for the winter months, and if it proves satisfactory this year It will be used again next. This arrange ment will continue six months, or until May 1. The .'{ cent fares will not l>e good for transfers. —Sedalia iMo.) Sentinel. I.ncky For the Soldier. Willie Mouse—Just my luck! Had him at my mercy, and now the blamed thing won't work.—New York Journal. Her Eloquent Look. The plea of a man arrested for swear ing at his mother-in-law was that she "commenced with him tirst." "Did she swear at you?" asked the judge. "No, your honor, but she looked it."— Atlanta Constitution. If any more presidential tickets are nominated, the Australian ballot will have to be done up on a hose reel. —St. Louis Globe-Democrat. There is no degree of devotion to party which demands that a man shall enrage and excite himself by discussing politic* ut his meals.—St. Louis Republic. The purification of politics is not an iridescent dream. It is one of the cer tainties of the future, guaranteed by the principles of progress distinguishing tin march of man from the dugouts of pri meval times to the palatial abod«a of civilization.—Troy Press. GOHSOHPTIOI Gil BE CUBED. T. A. Slocum, M. C., the Great Chem ' t and Scientist, Will Send Free, to i!.e Afflicted, Three Bottles of Ms Newh Dihcuvtml Reme dies to Cure Consumption ami All Lung Troubles. Nothing could belairer, more philan thropic or carry nioiejoy to the afiiict ed, than the oiler of T. A. Slocum, M. C., of New York City. Confident that he has discovered a reliable cure for consumption and all bronchial, throat and lung diseases, general decline and weakness, loss of llesli and all conditions wasting, and to make its great merits known, he will send, free, three bottles to any reader of the AMERICAN who may be suffering. Already this "new scientific course of medicine" has permanently cured thou sands of apparently hopeless cases. The Doctor considers it his religious duty—a duty which he owes to human ity—to donate his infallible cure. He has proved the dreaded consump tion to be a curable disease beyond any doubt, and has on tile in liis American and European laboratories testimonials of experience from those benefitted and cured, in all parts of the world. Don't de'«y until it is too late. Con sumption, uninferrnped, means speedy and certain death. Address T. A Slocum, M. V., !r. King's New Life Pills, Thousands >f sufferers have proved their matchless merit for Sick and Nervous Headaches i They make pure blood and build up health. Only 25 cents. Money back if not cured. Sold by Panles &Co , Drug j gists. J SANCTUM STORIES. Two InoldentM In the Sews of a Live ly Town. [Copyright, 1900, by C. B. Lewis.] Tuesday night while the editor of The Tribune was waiting at the post office for the mail to be distributed Jonas Williams approached us and put his list against our nose and said he could whip us in two minutes. We have been criticised for turning away from him without replying, but we Wish it understood that we promised / -r" A HEItOIC DEED. our dying first wife never to strike a man in anger, and we felt that she was looking down upon us from heaven and expecting us to keep our promise. It was no lack of courage on our part, but simply that we remembered our promise and restrained ourself. The Beacon congratulates Mrs. Elmer Clymer on her heroism. Although only the wife of a humble carpenter, she is possessed of those traits of character that made Joan of Arc world famous. On Sunday night last, as Mr. Clymer was descending the cellar stairs to 1 bring up some potatoes for breakfast, he tripped and pitched forward and landed in a barrel of soft soap. Only his heels were visible as the heroic wife ran down to his assistance, but instead of losing precious time by call ing out for the fire department, of which we are foreman, she grabbed those heels, heaved away, with a prayer in her heart, and after a terrific struggle brought her loved one out of the barrel. He was insensible, and she worked over him for half an hour be fore he recovered. He was all right next morning, however, though still feeling soapy on the inside. But for the presence of mind of liis wife—but for heroism without a parallel for the last hundred years—he would now be lying in his grave. We are willing to give a quarter to head a public sub scription to give the heroine a testi monial—a shell back comb, a new cor set or something to be treasured as a souvenir. M. QUAD. Some Women Would. "The Chinese woman is ridiculed for her small feet." she said. "True," he replied. "Civilization does does not sanction foot binding." "And the woman with large feet Is also ridiculed." "True again." "Oh. dear!" she sighed. "Woman does have a hard time in this world, doesn't she? I wonder if she wouldn't be bet ter off without Let." "Possibly," he replied, "but I can't help thinking that she would attract considerable unfavorable comment walking on her hands."—Chicago Even ing Post. Omar In Exile. IN ITALY. To look on life with level, laughing brow, To love and lounge and live, no matter how; Oh, sweet do nothing in the summer shade Or winter sun, were paradise enowl IS GERMAXT. Two blates of bretzels, bringen sie genau, Ali-in largest bipe, six quarts of lager, thou, Beside me, liebchen, in the Drauerei; Oh, Brauerei were Haradise enow! IS FRANCE. A cafe table underneath the bough, A cigarette, a little glass and thou, My latest angel, in thy newest robe; Ob, raris, thou art paradise enowl IN ENGLAND. A field of stubble, furrowed by the plow, A trusty dog, a good breechloader. How? No I Not a woman within twenty milesl A day of slaughter's paradise enowl —Bertram! Stadwell in Chicago Record. Sense of Duty t "We had quite a thrilling rescue hori yesterday," said the first seashore so journer, "but 1 don't see anything in the papers about it." "Oh, there was nothing interesting about that," replied the other; "the wo man was rescued by her own husband." —Philadelphia Record. This Little Book. This little book I prize far more Than "volumes of forgotteft lore." Unto this little book belongs No thunder of a nation's wrongs; Its only songs are pimple songs. But, oh, what fancies o'er it flit! And, oh, the melody of it! For here, when skws were bright above you And fame and fortune sought to move you. You sang that sweetest song, "I love you!" —Atlanta Constitution. Sad. Mrs. Wiseman—Seems to me you cotne home from the theater wearing a pretty long face. Wiseman—Oh, well—sad play; tragic ending. Mrs. Wiseman—Why, how did it end? Wiseman (mournfully)— They married. —New York World. CoinfortlnK Her. "Will you remember me," she said, "When I am gone, when 1 am dead And laid away?" Ah, heartless man! He deeply sighed And in his softest tones replied, "I hope 1 may!" —Chicago Times-Uerald. Time, "They say she is a great deal older than he." "Never mind. He will catch up."— Life. Tern illation. Willie Ant—l've half a mind to take a pull or two just to see what it's like. —Chicago News. Great Luck of an Editor. *■ For two years all efforts to cure Ec zema in the palms of my hands failed." writes Editor H. N. Lester. of Syra ns ■. Kan., "then 1 was wholly cured by Bncklen's Arnica Salve. ' It's the world's best for eruptions, sores and all kin diseases. Only 2i)c at Panles »V Co GLEANINGS. Women clean thp streets of Cannes, the cleanest town in the world. A citizen of Lewiston, Me., has a wutch chain made of nine peach stone®. Each of the stones is carved on each side in a different device, so that there are 18 designs. The stones are joined with bars of gold, the whole making a rich and novel chain. In Edinburgh Ind., a hotel has been run exclusively for women for 50 years. A woman built the hotel and ran it for 17 years; then it was sold to the present owner, who hag been running it for 23 years. A bachelor boarder remained at the hotel 25 years. Six years ago there were only five clubs in the United States Golf associa tion. Now there are 25 associate and 225 allied clubs on tile roll. There are now in existence about 20 state or other branch leagues subordinate to the United States Golf association. Berlin's highest building, apart from the churches, is the 318 foot high chim ney of the electric elevated road power house. Only two church steeples sur pass it, that of the new cathedral. 330 feet, and that of the Kaiser Wilhelm Memorial church, 340 feet. THE ROYAL BOX. The Prince of Wales, according to Lon don gossip, is at work on a book which will deal chiefly with his travels. The sultan of Turkey has developed a passion for cards. He plays nearly all his leisure time, and whoever is unfortu nate enough to win from his incurs his lasting dislike. Princess Victoria of Wales has return ed from a tour in Switzerland with her old governess, Mrs. Johnstone, to whom she has always been greatly attached. Princess Victoria has been in strict in cognito as Miss Johnstone and has not been much recognized. Queen Dowager Margherita has just completed the distribution of her per sonal effects and has finally retired from the world. Her 300 superb costumes have been apportioned among her friends, and all her jewelry has been given to rel atives. Young Queen Helena has re ceived Margherita's royal diadem, valued * nearly $200,000. ARROW SHOTS. Flfel at Random, They May Yet Hit Their Mark. Every once in awhile you run across a man with a very impressive voice who doesn't amount to anything. Every man that goes up a back alley is not necessarily a thief. He may be learning to ride a bicycle. When a widower gets married, nearly every other widower is interested. Rocking chairs would not be of much nse if it were not for women who put in most of their time rocking. Hardly any jokes are funny unless | they are on the other fellow. When a man gets to the age where he ' keeps an accurate account of the time of day, he has not much else left to do. About all the satisfaction some folks have that they are not like other peo ple. Even folks who make a good deal of fuss when they get married look very ' common soon afterward. If there is a real big chair in the room, every chump that comes in tries to move it. Folks make presents of fountain peus j to people who cannot write. Heaf men always seem to have a spe- ' cial hankering to walk on the railroad. A woman will use the potato masher to drive a nail rather than hunt the ham mer. If it were not for an occasional scan dal, some folks would not seem to have very much fun. The height of martyrdom for a farm er boy is to wear collars and cuffs on a hot day. Every man has a grudge at some doc tor for a big bill he once charged him. When you find a man that says he is independent, you will soon find that he thinks that it pays better. •When a man begins to do things of which he is ashamed, he likes to asso ciate with other men who have also done mean things. People who never get to be worth much think all who become well off have to do it by being stingy.—Alex Miller. The Oi>xtacle. Adelaide—You know love iaughs at locksmiths, Adolph? Adolph—Yes, but it doesn't go into a burst of merriment over your papa's No. 8 boots. —Ohio State Journal. Now Tlilims Are Different. "I think I shall take Ruth to Niagara." "Didn't you just go there on your wed ding trip?" "Yes, but now we want togo and see what it looks like."—Life. The Little Dutch Queen. The little Dutch queen from the dunes and the dikes will soon be wedded, 1 ween; She will loop up her hair 'neath a coronet's glare, this fortunate little Dutch queen. And burghers will gather from market and (air to cheer at the wonderful scene. The little Dutch queen from the dunes and the dikes will marry a soldier, we're told; He's young, and he's tall; he came at her call; what matters the weight of his gold? She has titles to spare, her treasure she'll share with the fusileer handsome and bold. The little Dutch queen from the dunes and the dikes has a highly melodious voice; She told the grim fathers—and laughed at their frowns—she'd marry the man of her choice. And every true lover, the great and the small, with the little Dutch queen will rejoice. —Cleveland Plain Dealer. An Anxluos Inquiry. He—Why does your father keep that bulldog? She—Oh, for company, I suppose! He (anxious'iy)—His or—or yours?— A nswers. The IMilloaophy uf Improvidence. "Why don't you take an example from the little busy bep?" "I do," answered Meandering Mike. "I go around from flower to flower—that is to say, from house to house—gatberin up de sweets of life. But I'm altoged der too wise to hunt up a hive an go fillin it full o' de fruits o' me labor so dat some udder feller kin come along an rob it whenever he happens to feel de need o' honey."— Washington Star. Twice nit Illir. "I notice that you refer to my illus trious ancestor merely as Wilhelrn 1," re marked the kaiser. "Why not 'VVilhelm der Orosse?'" "But. your highness"— stammered the obsequious court historian. "Oh, that's all right! You may speak of me as 'Wilhelm der Double Grosse.' " —Philadelphia I'les*. I At .o automobiles nro In use Id ! Honolulu. A petroleum motor costs about 7 cents per horsepower per hour. An automobile accident insurance asso ciation is about to be formed hi New I York city to insure its policy holders •gainst accidents and to defend the innu merable lawsuits which have been brought against motorists all over the country, ofteu or very slight provocation. The idea of using a motor haulage iu connection with the market gardens near a metropolis has been suggested of late. Motor vehicles would obviate some of the difficulties that market gardeners hnve now to encounter in getting their produce to market, ar«l it would certainly pay some enterprising carrier to make the j fen t lire. Easy to Cure a Cold. if yon go alxmt it Take two or three Kranse's Cold Cnre Capsnles tlnr- ( iiifi the day and two before retiring at : night This will insure a good night's ' rest arid a free movement of the Ixiwles next morning. Continne the treatment next day and your cold will melt away, j Price 25c. Sold by Rossman A Son's [ Pharmacy, BLOSSOUfi EFFECTS ! Distinguish the Wall Paper this season Our designs rank with Frescoes is their grace and art. You should buy them because you get only what ie beautiful and correct here. We keep no half-way papers, they all come up to a certain standard, at prices astonishingly low, notwithstand ing the advance in price of all ravr materials. Prices range from 3 cent* to 75 cents per piece. A. H. GRONE Shoes, Shoes St3rlisli! Ciieap I ZE£elia,"ble I Bicycle, Cymnasium and Tennis Shoes. TUP: CELEBRATED Carlisle Shoes AND THE Snag Proof Rubber Boots A SPECIALTY. A. RCHATZ. NEW. STYLES IN TRIMMED HATS. We are showing a special line of eleg ant Trimmed Hats the most correct win ter styles among these are reproductions of the new ideas now being shown in New York, new and exclusive styles and effects not to be seen elsewhere, none bnt the best finest materials nsed in their make tip. \\ e carry a fnll line of Hem aways Embroidering Silks. JIHINI. 122 Mill Street. SOMETHING JU! A Rellame TIW SHOP For all kind of Tin Roofing* Spouting and Cenoral Job Work. Stoves, Heaters, Ranges, Furnaces, etc. PRICES THE LOWEST! QUiLITY THE BEST! JOHN HIXSON NO. 116 E. FRONT ST. ;S Jisr > " L 'r:f' SHAu « x ., i&ii#!, As AMY OTH, Wanted—A Husband ! Must !"• strong and never have alame lmck.— Or. KanUln'n Klilnry Tohlrfx stop the pain* ill once and cure permanently. Sold by Rommim .* Son, SSOO REWARD! We will pav the above reward for any rnm of Liver Complaint. IJyspepsia, Sick Headache, Indigestion. Constipation or Costivenens wo cannot cure with Liverita. the Up-To-Dato Little Liver I*lll. when the directions are strict ly complied with. They are purely Vegetable, and never fail to (five satisfaction Nixes contain 100 Tills, 10c boxes contain 10 Pills M boxes contain 15 Pills. Beware of substitutions aid Imitations. Sent by mail, stamps taken. SERVITA MEDIC AI, Co., «'or. Clinton km! Jackson sta., Chicago, 111. Sold by /V. DR. MOREAU'S tmst too PENNYROYAL PILLS The Safest. Sorest and Only 112 RELIABLE French REMEDY. y\ Price $1 00 p«»fcnx. rink wrsoper. extra strength, $2.00 per bo*, by mail. postpaid. Adaek. Or Knmktn'a Klilnrr stop the pain i