ttpmiitg Democrat.
HARVEY SICKLER. Publisher.
VOL. VII.
Iteming fie mortal,
A Dtmocretii weekly _
p*p*r devoted to Poll
Vet N*w, the Arts Jk PJPfc'Q.yfl't
e4 Sciences Ac. Pub- " Kak/T j
luhed every Wednes- -. i
<•7. at Tunkhaouoek *lS[?**#'
Wyoming County,Pa 'v T' .\ 'fSS t fjP
* HARVEY SICKLER. <!s*3s~
Terms—l copy 1 year, (in advance) 82,00; if
Set paid witbie six months, fc'2.so will be charged
NO paper will be DISCONTINUED, UDtil all ar
reeragasre paid; unless at the opium of puMiaher.
RATES OF ADVERTISING.
TE! LINES CONSTITI'TK A SQITARE.
One square one or three insertions 81 50 ,
Bvery subarqu- lit insertion lets than 8 50
RSALESTATE, PERSONAL PROPKRTV, and GENERAL !
AnrKßTist.NO, as ma be agreed up.m,
FATENT MEDICINES and other advertisements oy ;
the column :
One column, 1 year, S6O
Half column, 1 year * 35
Third column, 1 year, 25 t
fourth column, 1 year, 20
Husiness Cards of one square or less, per year, ,
erufa paper, 88
rr EDITORIAL or LOCAL ITEM advertising—with
out Advertise!" ent —15 cts. per line. Liberal terms i
made with permanent advertisers
EXECUTORS, ADMINISTRATES and Al'DI-j
TOR'S NOTICES, of thekeu.il length, 82,50 I
OBITUARrES.r SKceedißs too On s. each ; REI.I I
GIOUS and LITERARY NOTICES, not of general ]
nterest, one hulf tne regular rates.
i
rr Advertisesaewu muat he handed in bv TCES
DAT NOON, to iusure insertion the same week.
JOB WORK
f all kinds neatly executed, and at price* to suit
the times.
All TRANSIENT ADVERTISEMENTS and JOE
WORK must be paid for, when ordered
Business Notices.
Rit.JkW K 1.l r ll,hi ATTORNEYS AI i
LAW o®go ou Tioga Street Tunah.inuiM'k t'u |
UTM Tw. PIATT, ATTORNEY AT LAW <f j
ficc in Stark's Brick Block Tioga St., Tunk j
• ansnelcfa ■
Lf *,CpOPKR. PHY.-HOIAN A SlstEO> !
IL# Nwrton Centre. Luzerne Count v Pa.
L, HARRISII. ATTORNEY AT LAW
0 Ofh-e at the Court House, in Tunktiauuock '
Cp. J>
JW. RBOAD*. FUMieuV A JO. I dEu.V 1
• will attend" ph>m,d!y ti/ali > '• hfe pr.,- j
fesaion. Maybe fou ul at hi< 02L# at the Drug j
JStore. or at bis resides.* ou Pihu.au Srqet, tofuierly {
eccuptSi By" A. K. I'eckhuan Esq. < '
DENTISTRY. A
: :
DR. L T. BURNS baa peiynanentlv loeate# in i
Tunkhanno.S Borough, and re-re.Gully tender*
til professional services to its citizens
Office on second floor, formerly occupied ty Dr. '
Wilmao.
v6n3otf.
PORTRAIT, LANDSCAPE,
AVU
OEN&meutae
rATrvTirvG
By If. HUGJ-JK, Artist.
Rooms over the Wyoming National bank,in Stark's
Brick Block,
TLNKHA.NNOCK, I'A.
Life-size Portraits painted from Amb'otype? or |
Photographs Photographs Painted in Oil fV lore — i
All orders for paintings executed according to or
dr or 00charge made.
Instructions given in Drawine Sketching, '
Portrait and Landscape Painting, in Oil or water
Colors, and in all branches of the art.
Tunk, July 31, 'o' -vgnso-tf.
NEW
TAILORING SHOP
The Subscriber having had a sixieea years prac !
tical experience in cutting and making clothing j
aow offers his services in tnis line to the citizens of I
BICBOLSON And vicinity.
Those wishing to get Fits will find bis shop the
place to get them.
JOEL, R. SMITH
•nSO-6mni
"BOLTON HOUSE.
HARHISRURG, I'KNNA.
The undersigned having lately par. hased the
" BUEHLER HOUSE " property, hag already com
menced such alterations and Improvements as will
render this old and popular House equal, if not supe
rior, to any Hotel in the City of Harrishurg.
A continuance of the public patronage is refpect
fully solicited.
GEO. J. BOI.TON- j
"WALL'S HOTEL,
LATE AMERICAN HOUSE,
TU NKHAN NOCK, WYOMING CO., PA
THIS establishment hn* recently been refitted an
* lurnished in the latest style Everv attention
•ill he given to the comfort and convenience ol those
patronise the IIoue
T li WALL, Owner an I Proprietor .
Tookhannock, September 11. 1861
MEANS' HOTEL.
OWANDA, PA .
P- B. BAKTi.ET,
ILateolt,. P **I*ABN HOCSK, ELHIRA, N Y
PROPRIETOR.
Au?^ rEL - ' * of tM LARGEST
■ AR RANbED Houses io the country-It
s fitted up m the most ino<Wn and improved style,
and no pains are spared to miUo lt a p | cue4lJt and
agreeable stopping-place for all
v 3, n2l, ly
NORTH BRANCH HOTEL,
MESHOPPEN, WYOMING COI NTY, PA
Wm. U. (t)RTRI(lIIT, Prop'r
[TAVING resumed the proprietorship of the above
L-a. Hotel, the undersigned will spare no efforts
tender the house no agreeable place ol sojourn to
*ll who may favor it with their custom.
Mi KM
Slftotal.
THE peculiar taint or
infection which we
p*w ca *' lurks
yf in the constitutions of
rZZ. 8 multitudes of men. It
J cither produces or it
produced by an en
xrtTlJ^ vitiated elate
Tj^° f tIK " H ''
1 SfMr v ' forces in their
vigorous action, aud
" fall into disorder and
decay. The scrofulous contamination is va
riously caused by mercurial disease, low
living, disordered digestion from unhealthy
food, impure air, filth and filthy habits,
the depressing vices, and. ahove all, hy
the venereal infection. Whatever "be its
origin, it is hereditary in the constitution,
descending " from parents to children unto
the third and fourth generation; " indeed, il
seems to be the rod of Him w ho says, "I will
visit the iniquities of the fathers upon their
children." The diseases it originates take
various names, according to tiie organs it
attacks. In the lungs. Scrofula produces
tubercles, and finally Consumption; in the
glands, swellings which suppurate and be
come ulcerous sores; in the stomach and
bowels, derangements which produce indi
gestion. dyspepsia, and liver complaints; on
the skin, eruptive and cutaneous affections.
These, all having the ssttne origin, require the
same remedy, viz., purification and invigora
tion of the blood. Purify the blood, and
these dangerous distempers leave you. With
feeble, foul, or corrupted blood, you cannot
have health; with that "life of the llesh"
healthy, you cannot have scrofulous disease.
Ayer's Saraaparilla
is compounded front the most effectual anti
dotes that medical science has discovered for
this afflicting distemper, anil for the cure of
the disorders it entails. That it is far supe
rior to any other remedy yet devised, ia
known by all who have given it a trial. That
it does combine virtues truly extraordinary
in their effect upon this class of complaints,
is indisputably proven by the great multitude
j of publicly known and remarkable cures it
has made of the following diseases: King's
Evil, or Glandular Swellings, Tumors,
Eruptions, Pimples, Blotches and Sores,
, Erysipelas, Rose or St Anthony's Fire,
Salt Rheum, Scald Head, Coughs from
tuberculous depodt3 in the lung 3, White
Swellings, Debility, Dropsy, Neuralgia,
Dyspepsia or Indigestion, Syphilis and
Syphilitic Infections, Mercurial Diseases,
Female Weaknesses, and. indeed, the whole
i series of complaints that ari?e from impurity
of the blood. Minute reports of individual
eases may lie found in A\ tit's AMLKH AK
ALMAXAC, W liich is furnished to the drugyistt
for gratuitous distribution, wherein may tie
learned the directions for its use, and some
of tire remarkable cures which it has made
when ail other remedies had failed to afford
relief. Those eases are purposely taken
from all section* of the country, in order
that every reader may have access to some
one who can speak to hint of its benefits from
personal experience. Scrofula depresses the
vital energies, and thus leaves its victims far
more subject fodista-e and its fatal results
than are healthy constitutions. Hence it
tends to shorten, and docs greatly shorten,
the average duration of human life. The
vast importance of these considerations has
led us to spend years in perfecting a remedy
which is adequate to its cure. This we now
offer to the public under the name of ATKH'S
SAKSUMUILLA, although it is composed of
ingredients, some of w hicli exceed the best
of Si tusapartlla in alterative power. By its
aid you may protect yourself from the suffer
ing and danger of these disorders. Purge
out the foul corruptions that rot and fester
in the blood, purge out the causes of disease,
and vigorous health will follow. By its pecu
liar virtues this remedy stimulates the vital
functions, and thus expels the distempers
which lurk within the system or hurst out
on any part of it
AVe know the public have been deceived
by many compounds of Sttrsoparilla , that
promised much and did nothing; hut they
will neither be deceived nor disappointed in
this. Its virtues have been proven Ly abun
dant trial, and there remains 110 question of
its surpassing excellence for the cure of the
afflicting diseases it is intended to reach.
Although under the same name, it is a very
different medicine from any other which has
been before the people, ami is far more ef
fectual than any other which has ever been
available to them.
AYER'B
CHERRY PECTORAL,
Tho World's Great Remedy for
Coughs, Colds, Incipient Con
sumption, and for the relief
of Consumptive patients
in advanced stages
of the disease.
This has been so long used and so uni
versally known, tliat we need do no mora
than assure the public that its quality is kept
up to the best it ever has been, and that it
may be relied on to do all it has ever done.
Prepared by Da. J. C. AVER & Co.,
Practical and Analytical C/iemisU,
Lowell, Mass.
Sold by all druggists every where.
For side ny I!, nneil A U oin ityne, ari l Lvraan &
Wells, Tunkhnnnock, fling A .Son, Mc.boppen,
Stevens A Ackley. LareyviEe, Freer Dean A Co.,
Fft.-t'>ryville. mnt all Druggists uuj Dealers in med
icines. everywhere. £
IEV MILIIMY (fUnM
MRS. BAKDWELL is now receiving a splendid
stock of SPKIXH A SUMMER Hoods of. il the new
est SHAVES ..f FELT
and VELVET HAT£
for LADIES aid CHIL
DREN. Al-. BONNETS,
VELVET RIBBONS
FLOWERS, and
and a full assortment of
l FANCY GOODS.
I
at prices to ilefy competition
#ll the latest styles of paper patterns,
j SLEEVES, CLOAKS, JACKETS.
&c., drc.,
from MADAME DEMOHES7.
J y Drama made, cut and basted at the shortest
notice.
1 M*3. BARDWBLL.
I Tuaktitanoefc, May. 23, 13g".—vfctl N.
TIINKIIANNOCK. WYOMING CO., PA.-WEDNESDAY, OCT, 16. 1867.
lortni.
PADDLE YOUR OWN CANOE.
sr MRS. SARAH T SOLTOK.
Voyager upon Life's sea,
To yourself ho truo,
And wbore'er your lot may bo,
Paddle your own cinoo,
Never, though the winls miy rave,
Falter nor l*>ok back,
But upon the darkest wave
Leave a shining track,
t
Nobly dare the wildest storm,
Stem the hardest gale.
Brave of heart and strong of arm
Yon wi;l never tall.
When the world hi* old and daik.
Keep an aim in view,
And toward the beacon mark
Paddle yutarown canoe,
Every wave that bears you on
To the silent shore,
From its sunny source has gone
To return no more.
Then let not an hour's delay,
Cheat you of your due,
But, while it i.- called to- day,
Paddle your own canoe,
If your birth denied you wealth, #
Lofty state and power,
Honest fame and hardy health.
Are a bett*-r dower;
But if these will not suffice,
Golden gain pursue,
And to win the glittering prize,
Paddle your own canoe- 9
"Would you wrest the wreath of Fame
From the hand of Fate :
Would you write a deathless name,
With the good and great ;
Would you bless yt ur fellow men,
Heart and soul imbue
With the iioiy task, and then
Paddle your own canoe
Would you crush the tyrant Wrong,
In tne world's five fight,
With a sp ; rit brave and strong,
Battle for the Right ;
And to break the chain that bind
The many 10 the few—
To enfranchise slavish mind,
Paddle your owu canoe.
Nothing great is lightly uon,
Nothing won is lost—
Every good deed, nobly done,
Will repay the cost,
Leave to Heaven in humble trust,
All y iu will to do ;
But, if you succeed, you must
Paddie your own canoe.
BOH ANTIC INCIDENT.
A romantic little incident has just come
to my knowledge. The facts as given to
tne are as follows. Two years ago Hugh
Crawford Folock, H young gentleman then
about twenty years old, suddenly disap
peared from his home in -Scotland, much
to the dismay of his relatives aid acquain
tances. It subsequently became known
that he had come to this country with five
hundred pounds in his pocket. He sported
about New York and other cities until his
funds commenced to run short, when, in a
fit of desperation,be enlisted in the Fifth
United States cavalry as a private soldier,
and in this humble capacity struggled
against hardships and deprivations to
which he had wholly unused. In
the meantime his father died some four
months ago, leaving Hugh heir to a baron
etcy and a snug little income of live thou
sand pounds per annum,t>r about $2£.000
in gold. The young baronet was duly
sought for, and, after an expenditure of
in advertising, it was ascertained
that he was stationed at Camp Verde, Tex
as, discharging the duties of a farrier.—
Colonel William S, Htllver, of New York,
who became interested in the case, induced
Sir Frederick Bruce to procure the dis
charge of Pollock, which was promptly
acceded to by General Grant. The young
Sir Hugh Crawford Pollock, has, therefore,
been telegraphed for, and has given up
the occupation of siioer and curer of hors
es, to enter upon a Scotch baronetcy and
five thousand pounds a year. Such is life.
—Correspondence AC Y. Herald.
PLAIN SAXON SPEECH UNDERSTOOD.—
A good story is told of a certain Colonel,
in the late war. The Colonel aforesaid
was riding in a stage coach, with saveral
oilier passengers, when he accidentally
dropped his hat outside of the coach. Put
ting his head out of the window, he ex
claimed in a sentorian voice, "Charioteer,
pause I have lost my chapean." The dri
ver paid no heed to the demand. Again
the bombastic fellow aulhoritively spoke—
"Charioteer, pause ! I have lost my, chn—
peau." No attention being paid by the
driver to this last command, a plain, blunt
man. who had become disgusted with his
fellow traveler's silliness and pomposity
put his head out of the window, and said,
"Driver, hold on ! this D d fnol has
last his hat." This wag perf.-ctly intelligi
ble *o the driver, expletive and all, and the
hat was secured.
The ripest fruit first falls, — Shaks
jxm t*.
" To Speak his Thoughts is Every Freeman's Bight. "
THE HORRID LITTLE FRIGHT.
"So you have told your father you will
not marry vour cousin Cota ?
Yes. 1 have made up my mind that I
would rather lose my grandfather's money
than marry that horrid little frig it.'
The first speaker was a tine-looking
young man of some thre-and twenty years.
11 is companion, Kliiott Grantley, was
about the same age, tall and extremely
hand*ome, with rich, clustering, chestnut
curls, large black eyes, full of fire and in
telligence, fine features, and a very beauti
ful mouth filled with white, even teeth,
and shaded by a dark moustache. His
figure was moulded in the perfection of a
manly symmetry.
"You never saw her, Arnold," said he,
leaning over the table, and speaking ear
nestly ; "you never saw her, but I went
down some eight or ninv years ago to pay
a visit to mv intended wife. Fancy to
yourself a thin child ten years old,
yellow as an otange, witL pinched fea
tures, and a close, white cap put on to con
ceal the loss of her hair, which was shaved
off after an illness. When I was intro
duced to her she dropped a little awkward
courtesy, and put her finger in her tnoufh,
and after staring at rue in silence for a few
minutes she began to giggle, and finally
ran away."
A fascinating picture, truly."
"Cousin Corn is coining to pay a visit
to Lucy Maxwell next we-k, and I aup
oose I must do the agreeable, but I will
never marry that horrid little tright.—
Come, Arnold, suppose we go down lo see
Charlotte Cusbman as Lady Macbeth."
"Agreed"
And the two strolled away.
Thcv had bardiv gone when the win
dow curtains were drawn aside, ani a tiny,
fairy-like girl stepped in from the balco
ny. She was young, aboit fifteen, with
bright, goldrn hair and biue eyes.
"Now ain't it a shame or Elliott to talk
so about Cousin Cora ?" -oliloquized the
intruder. 1 didn't mean to listen, hut I
couldn't come in before Arnold in this
dress," and she glanced at the pretty chintz
wrapper. "Wouldn't it b? fun if ho fell
in love with Cousin Cora, after all ? I
wonder if is so ugly ? She writes
beautiful letters to me, but I have never
seen her. I mean to writ-; to her what
Elliott says, so she wont fal in love with
him. 11 e's so handsome I din 1 believe she
can help it if she don't know," and the
fairy tripped away.
Two young ladies, some lays later,were
standing in a brilliantly lighted parlor be
fore a pier glass. Everything indicated
that there were visitors expected. The
room was beautifully decorated, and the
ladies were in full dress. One of them,
Miss Lucy Maxwell, had a very sweet face
and a pleasant, winning smile. She was
dressed in white. The other was tall and
stately, with beautiful features, clear, white
complexion, with a rich, warm color, and
large black e\es. Her hair, which was
wieathed like a coronet round her small,
classically shaped head, was as biaek as a
ravens wing, and the diamonds among its
braids added to her regal appearance.—
Her dress was of garnet-colored silk,
flounced with black lace, and her beauti
ful white arms and shoulders gleamed out
in a strong contrast against the dark
dress.
"Do I look well, Lucy?"
"Yon never looked more beautiful. I
thtnk diamonds suit you exactly. Your
necklace and bracelets are divine. But
what can detain Elliott? lie promised to
come early to meet his Cousia Cora be
fore the others arrived."
"Poor fellow ? How disappointed he
will br."
"Yes, Miss Stanley," said Lucy, laugh
ing. There is a ring. Ah, here he is."
"I am very sorry that Cora was unable
to pay me her promised visit," said Miss
Maxwell, meeting her guest; "but I have
another guest. Dora, allow ni" to intro
duce Mr. Grantly, our dear friend Cora
Grantlev's cousin and hetrothel.
F-lliott's low bow and glance of intense
admiration did not look much like disap
pointment.
Other guests arrived. Miss Stanley,
with her magnificent beauty and queenly
bearing, was the belle of the evening, and
none were more devoted than Elliott
Grantley. Did site dance, lie was her
partner more than half the time. Was
she fatigued, he handed her a chair and
fanned her.
Day after day passed, and Elliott was
constantly at Mr. Maxwells. Miss Stan
lev while she was deluged with attention
from every quarter, showed him especial
favor She rode with him, sang with him,
dai ced with him, wore the flowers he pre
sented, and learned the music he selected.
"Well, dear," said Lucy, coming one
day to her room, "I think you have made
a Complete conquest of Elliott, lie raves
about you and last evening he confined to
me his intention of honoring you by an of
fer of his hand and heart."
"Won!" cried Miss Stanley, rising and
stepping to the glass "Won ! 1 will re
fuse hun !"
"But I thought you confessed to me a
certain liking for the gentleman,"
"1 will not have him. He refused me,
and I will repay the obligation. No, Lu
cy, I resolved it I could win his it>vc no
pains should be spared. Now 1 feel hu
miliaied to think that I have ever s.ooped
to gain it. I do love him ; but nevertheless
I will refuse him."
"And how w ill vou bear it ?"
"Perhaps lie will turn to his cousin
Cora for consolation ; if not. I can easily
bring him to my feet again."
The next day Mr, Grantley, to bia pro
found astonishment, waa refused by Miss
Stanley* He could not understand it.—
Full of indignation at wbat he termed co
quetry, he determined to visit his consiu
Cora, and, if he found her improved mar
ry her to show that he did not care for his
rejection. Full of this idea, he started for
his uncle's A long jonrney somewhat
cooled his disappoinimcnt, and he bad re
solved to pay a flying visit to his relative
and then return once more to attack Miss
Stanley's heart long before he reached his
uncle's house.
"Cora, my dear, your cousin Elliott is
in the parlor."
"1 knew he would come," said the per
son addressed, as *he shook out the folds
of her rich dark silk dress, and then went
to the parlor The room was dark, for it
was late in the afternoon, and yet too ear
ly for candles."
"Good afternoon, Cousin."
Elliott could hardly believe bis ears
Truly he he had somewhere beard that
voice before.
"We have expected you for some
weeks," continui'd the mtsterious voice,—
"It is very dull here in this season, and
I quite longed for your promised visit.—
However 1 was very happy to hear from
Lucy that your time was more agreeably
employed, How is Miss Stanley?"
"I think —that is—l was "
"Alt, I am delighted to hear that she is
so well. Of course you are engaged by
this time ? It was not treating me fairly,
but I forgive you. Do you know I have
some thoughts of marrying our dancing
master, Mons. La l'irouette ?"
"Do you ? Thank you."
At that moment lights were brought in.
Cora was standing with her face concealed
by a window curtain, but as the servant
left the room she dropped the screen. In
an instant Elliott was by her side.
"Dora 1"
"Alter the first letter."
"Dora—Cora—, I mean—oh, I '
"Stop! stop, Mr. Grantley; surely, you
would not marry such a horrid little
fright ?"'
"Forgive mc!'
"W ell, reader, we will retire. There
was a wddding a few months later, and
Elliott married that "Horrid Little Fright!"
SPEAK DISTINCTLY.
No nation excels our own in the talking,
faculty, not even the voluble Frenchman,
and among no other people can so many
persons be found who think themselves
qualified, and who reallv possess some, to
"speak in meeting," We have a largt r
number than any other people of those
who can speak iu public intelligently.—
But the great deficiency with the majority
of them is that they do not speak intelli
gibly*. They do Uut articulate distinctly
or make themselves heard as they should,
nor as they intend. How often is the lis
tener annoyed by the habit which minis
ters, lawyers, and stump orators have, of
either suddenly dropping the voice near
or at the close of a sentence, so that the
final utterance becomes quite impossible of
apptehension. You want to hear what
the man is going to say, but vou fail, be
cause he don t say it—at least for your
ear. It is one of the most provoking
things in the world—and [rives one much
the same sensation, as it would to lose a
choice morsel, the best of the feast, by
having it slip away from your lips just as
your mouth was all made up for it. Pub
lic speakers should correct this vicious
trick of suddenly reducing their intuiligi
ble utterances to inarticulate sounds.—
Some evidently resort to the practice with
the idea ol giving added force, solemnity
or emphasis to what they say, hut they
overdo it so completely as to destroy the
effect of all that has ptcceeded the attempt
to give an effective finish.
Another hahit, even worse, is that of |
mumbling instead of artieulrting, slurring
over words,giving the v.nvds only half;
their requisite volume and time and end
ing in a confused rumble of consonant
sounds. This is peculiarly a fault ot Eng
lish orators. Not a dozen of the talking
members of Parliament speak with such
distinctness as to be lieai<l by a poison at
a distance of fifty feet. Speaking of this j
the Pail Mai. (iazette says: "The O'dir.a- !
ry English orator cannot be understood |
simply because he mumbles instead of ar- (
ticulating his syllables distinctly. Having j
got a language oveiflowing with consonants I
he intensifies the evil by cultivating a |
habit of not opening or closing his hps j
with that decision and completeness with-)
out which no language whatever can be
properly spoken. Our American public
speakers are amenable to the sapie ciiti
cism. It is a fault that might be easily
corrected, and for the comfort of the hear
ers, and the effectiveness of the speech it
should be. It is the same thing that
makes the majority of men such poor
readei6of their owr. language. The first,
second and final exhortation, which wc
would give to children learning to read
aloud, would be—''articulate, articulate
distinctly." This is not as some suppose
incompatible with rapidity of speech
Some of the most rapid of public speak
ers arc thoe whose speech is most distinct
ly audible and most easily understood. —
We have beard Kufas Choate utter as ma
ny words per minute as moat orators
would be able to speak in three minutes,
aDd continue this rapid speech for hours,
yet not a word or syllable would be lost.
Every one was completely articulated and
reached the ear without difficulty. Notb
' ing would lead mote directly and positive
| ly to improve the character of American
' public speaking, than for orators to be
| constantly mindful of the rule—speak
S plainly, articulate fully and distinctly.—
i Jerwj City Journal, *
ADVERTISEMENT EXTRAORDI
NARY.
"Mrs. Government," the lovely, amiable
and refined relict of the "late lamented"
is out in a series of letters, bemoaning the
insufficiency of her income from what re
ntaius of the accumulations of the Presi
dential office to support her. She scolds
hke a termagant,be rating the Black R pub
lican party in general, and some of her of- j
fiee beneficiaries in particular, for ingrati
tude and want of respect for her deceased
husband. She says the revenue from
what remains of Mr. Lincoln's estate is j
but about $1,700, which is altogether iu- ;
adequate to support her and her family,!
wjiich consists of herself and two bovs, one '
of whom is 21 years old, and the" other
well along in his teens. One would sup- '
pose that, the boys being big enough to i
earn their own livings, site might, by i
tkrinchtng. manage to live on the little!
matter of So a day, especially if she can :
remember how she managed a few years j
ago, when her husband was unknown to i
fame, and worked as a common field hand j
on a farm, before he "took up" lawyering
in the inferior courts, from which hi 3 earn
ings were but little increased until the 1
freak of fortune that threw him to the top !
of the bubbling cauldron. But she must'
have forgotten how she managed in those
good oIJ days, and therefore advertises a 1
few trifles of her personal wardrobe lor 1
sale, as follows:
1 bl'k centre camel's hair shaw, long $1,500
1 while centre do do do 1,200
1 white centre do do do 4©o
1 black centre do do square 350
1 red centre do do do 100
2 small shawls, square 50
1 white Paisley shawl, long 75
1 white Paisley shawl, square 50
3 supertiue point black lace shawls,
$1.5u0, SSOO, S3OO
2 supeiflnc point black lace sh'is SSO, S4O
1 white point lace shawl, long 2,000
1 do do dress, unmade 4,000
1 do do flounce, 150
1 do do parasol cover 260
1 do do handkerchief 80
I Russian sable cape 1,500
1 do do boa 1,200
Also many other articles, including dia
monds, rings, Aic. ifce.
Let us hope that the "loyal" will buy
up these old clothes and things at such pri
ces as to enable the amieble widow to
weather the Winter at least, in hopes that
something may meanwhile "turn dp."—
These aiticles are ou sale at the rooms of
Mr. Brady, GO9 Broadway, and we cheer
fully contribute this advertisement, as our
share of the debt deemed due from the
eountiy by this model of womanly refine
ment, w luioine known, honored and court
ed by ungrateful office seekers as "Mrs.
Government." Where's "Flora McFlim
scy ? '
VALUABLE RECIPES.
To remove freckles, cut them out with
a razor, and throw ihem away. They
will never return.
To bring out a moustaehe, tie to it a
strong chord, twenty feet long, to the oth
er end of which attach a heavy smoothing
iron, and throw the latter trom a fourth
storv window.
To procure a fair complexion, go lo sea
iu a crazy old boat, and the first gale you j
get into, your lace will become white.
To get rid of red hair, hold your bead!
for a few minutes in a strong blaze of gas. 1
To preserve yout eves, put them iu a
bottle filled with alcohol.
To avoid corpulence, quit eating.
To concetti had teeth, keep your mouth
shut.
'Lo keep out of debt, acquire the reputa
tion of a rascal, and no one will trust you.
To keep your name up, write it fre
quently ou the dome ot the Capital, the
State House steeple, and other high pla
ces
To become a competent book keeper,
boriow all the books you can, aud never
return then).
To "raise the stamps,'' say a funny thing
on the stage.
To keep your doors from being broken
open hy burglars, don't close them.
To keep out of a fight, stay by yourself.
To gain time, steal a watch.
To keep from stuttering, don't talk.
To destroy rats, catch them one by one,
and flatten their heads with a lemon
squeezer.
To kill cockroaches, get a pair of heavy
boots, then catch j our roaches, put them
in a barrel, and then get in and dance.
To k;ll bedbugs, chain their hind legs
to a tree, then go round in front and make
mouths at them.
To catch mice, on going to bed put
crumbs of cheese into your mouth, and lie
with it open, and when a mouse's whiskers
tickle your throat, bite;
To prevent dogs from going mad, cut
their tails off just behind their ears.
HUMILIATING, —If there b a circum
stance in social life calculated to make a
man diminished head," it is the
discovery that some one has walked off
with his hat. and left one several sizes too
large.
It is related that a nervous old
mu J recently attempted to remove a large
bug from the bonnet of a lady who sat in
front of him at a theatre in New York.—
The result was, be unroofed all her back
hair, the bug's office being to hold head
and hair together.
TERMS, $2.00 Per. ANNUM, in Advance.
NO. 11.
| pise aift pljfttuiSE.
New Axiom—A tbornin the bush is worth
I two in the hand.
lb the choice of a wife, take tiid obedient
| daughter of a good mother.
1 Truth irritates those only whom it eolight*
ens but does hot ton reft.
Why does a bricklayer resemble a bird 1
l Because he has often raised a wing and Sue.
A s.>und discretion is not so much indica
ted by never making a mistake, as by never
repeating one.
The man who was hemmed in by a crowd
has been.troubled with a stitch in his Side
| ever since.
I ,
"Grace before meat," as the young lady
said when she laced herself too tight to swal
low.
A sermon in four words on tho vanity of
1 earthly possession : 'Shrouds have nopoca*
eta."
Delinquent school boys prefer a teacher
; witn an Italian hand. Up strokes heavy and
the down strokes light.
"Ma, if you will give me a peach I will be
a good boy."
"No, my child, you must not be good for
! pay ; that is not right."
"You don't want me to be goad for nothing
do you?"
.
"Pap," observed a young urchin of tendor
j years to his fond parent, "does the lord know
j evefything 7" "Yes, toy sofl," replied the
hopeful siry; "but why do you aak that
j question7" "Because our Preacher, when
i he prays, is so long telling the Lord all about
President Johnson, and the Rebels, I
thought he was'nt poatsd." The parent re*
fleeted.
A Dutchman describing an accident
i Vonce a long time ago, I vent into mine abbld
j orchard to climb a bear tree to get some
j beaches to make mine vrow a blum budding
mit; and ven I gets on the toper moat limb
; branch, I fall down from the lowermost limb
wid one leg on both sides of de fence and
like to stove my outside in.
This life the erad.'e of the other.—
Whai, then, sickness, time, old age, death 7
—different degrees of a metamorphosis which
! doubtless has been here below only its be
ginnings.—Joubcrt.
—♦
The swan subdues the eagle when he at
tacks on her own element; so the weakest
may subdue his strongest foe, if he will but
keep his place anu do his duty.
"Is it not astonishing," said a wealthy in
dividual, "that a large fortune was left me by
a person who had only seen me once 7" "It
would have beeri still mora astonishing," said
a wag, "if he had left it to you after seeing
you twice."
An inquisitive urchin at Pittefield, Mass.,
while reciting a lesson, the other day, from
Christ's Sermon on the Mount, broke out:—
"Mother, did Jesus Christ get two thousand
dollars a year for preaching, like our minis
ter ?"
The Boston Post says a lady passed through
that city, on Wednesday, for the mountains,
with sixteen trunks, four poodles, three maid
servants, an Irishman and a husband. Thu
latter appeared to be the least important part
of the interesting group.
Said a very good old man : "Some folks ere
always complaining about the weather, but I
am very thankful when I wake up in the
morning to find any weather at all."
A Farmer wrote as follows to a distinguish
ed scientific agriculturalist, to whom he felt
under great obligations for introducing e va
liety of swine ' Respected Sir—l went
yesterday to the cattle 6bow. I found sevei
al pigs of your species. There was a.great
variety of hogs, and I was astonished at not
seeing you there,
"The only Liberty Cap," says a elever and
witty author, "is the night cap. In it men
visit, one third ol there lives, the land of aleep
the only land wbe they are free and equal,'
Josh Billings correctly remarks : "Success
in life iz very apt low make us forjai the
time when we was'nt much. It is juat so
with the frog on the jump ; ha kant remem
ber when he was a k tadpole—but other folks
kan.
A Texat paper hu a poet. Hero ! one of
his stansas
"The Lambkin Crops its Crimson gem
The Blue Fly Bends Its pensil stem
The wild Bee munnnrs on Its Breast
Right ©V the Sky Lark's Nest."
"The devil jumped up, in a terrible rage,
X sat two lutes to fill out tbia page.'