HENRY A. PARSONS, Jr., Editor and Publisher. ii, DEStEIlANtM. Two Dollars per Annum.
""" IMM . TT1l II II i '" ' " ' ' " ' H I '
YOL. XII. 1UDGWAY, ELK COUNTY, PA,, THUHSDAY, NOVEMBEE 2. NO. 37.
- 1 11 . - j
After a White.
There is a strange, sweet solace in the
thought,
That all the woes we Buffer here below
May, M a dark and hideous garment wrought
For ns to wear, whether we will or not,
Be cast aside, with a relieving srnilo,
After a little while.
Only a little while this vale of tears
With moans and sighs shall hem our devi
ous way;
Only a little while the grief that sears
And wrings and rends shall gloat above its
prey;
And fade will, likewise, every hollow guile
After a little while.
What if we lose earth's pageants, fresh and
fair
The pride of morn, the sunset's gorgeous
' fields,
Xove's leaping pulse, and the unmeasured
share
That Nature's largess for the asking
yields
If death to brighter shores our souls exilo
After a littlo while?
No mortal roaming but hath certain oud;
Though far unto the ocean-spaces grny
We sail nnd sail, without a chart for friend,
Above the sky-line, faint and far away,
There looms at last the one enchanted islo
After a littlo while.
Though over burning and inveterate sands,
To seek the river's mystic source vo
strain.
With parching lips, scorched feet and blis
tered hands,
At last there rises the ono mountain chain
That folds the fountains of our spirit's Nile
After a little while.
Oh, when our cares come thronging thick
und fast,
With more of anguish than the heart can
bear,
Though friends desert, and, a's the heedless
blast,
Even love pass by us with a stony sta'-e,
Let us withdraw into some ruined pile,
Or lonely forest aisle,
And contemphito the never-ceasing change
Whereby the processes of God are wrought,
Aud from our petty lives our souls estrange.
Till, bathed in currents of exalted thought,
We feel the rest that must our cares beguile
After a little while!
Calvert's Magazine.
A Breach of Discipline.
"It's no use speaking, Brereton; I
must go."
"Are you mad, Kendal? It's your
night on guard, and you know what a
martinet the colonel is."
" I tell you I will go. The colonel's
not a dancing man. He'll know noth
ing about it."
" Don't you believe it. The colonel's
thick with tltose Lindsay girls, and
I'll bet you ten to one he's there to
meet them."
"Oh, hang it! I'll take my chance
then," was the reply ,in the dogged tone
of a man who knows he is in the
wrong, lmt does not choose to yield.
The speakers were two ollicers of
the th regiment, which had been
quartered for the last six months at
Singleborough. The subject of dis
cussion was a great public ball which
was to take place that evening. The
regiment, was to be relieved in a day
or two, anil the ball would be the last at
which the gallant ollicers of the th
would appear in that hospitable town.
Captain Kendal looked very obsti
nate as he answered the prudent ad
monitions of his friend Brereton, who
gave a long whistle, and tapped the
ground ominously with his cane.
" 1 gave you credit t or more common
sense," ho resumes, after a pause.
" Then you were mistaken, you see."
"So it seems, but it is an awful
pity. You'll be cashiered to a cer
tainty, for the old fellow is keen as a
hawk and is sure to find you out. I
say, man, be advised; give it up; the
game's too dangerous."
"Pooh!" exclaimed the other, test
ily. " I tell you the colonel won't be
there, and if ho were, trust to me
to dodge him. Why, bless you, he's
blind as a mole:
His friend looked utterly uncon
vinced, but remonstrance was plainly
of no use.
" It's all because of that Leslie girl,"
he said, ruefully, for he was honestly
attached to his messmate, and saw
clearly the consequences which might
be expected to follow upon his attend
ance nt the ball. " Thank Heaven,
I'm not in love!"
. ".Spare your eloquence and have
done now, can't you?" replied Captain
Kendal, ungraciously. "Go, I must
and will, but trust to me to take care
of myself."
The two friends walked down the
rest of the street in silence till Brere
ton turned into his club, while the
other went on, with a slightly anxious
frown on his handsome, sunburnt
face, and swinging his cane uneasily.
He knew Brereton was right, but
wrong is apt to be stronger than right
sometimes, and the temptation in this
case was powerful. He was about to
commit, deliberately, a glaring breach
of military discipline, which, if discov
ered, would assuredly cost him dear
and put an end to more pleasant hopes
than one. Nevertheless, he was quite
determined to risk it. It was his duty
to keep guard that night at the Itoyal
bank, and his colonel was not a man
. 1, 1 .1 .1.. 1 , , .1. ... . X
wno WOlllll UgUUY uvl-iuhmv evru u
trirlinir offense UL'ainst the military
- ' n J '
fthenT was-the motive which
(induce this gallant young oflicer
majesty's service, who had al
ready won distinction for his bravery
on the battlefield, and who had always
acquitted himself well and honorably
heretofore, to plan recklessly so grave
an infringement of duty as the aband
onment of the post he was bound in all
onor to guard i
W e oiler no excuse. Hut the expla
nation of his conduct must be found
in his state of mind, which was abnor
mal. Brereton was right. There was
a woman in the case, lief ore his mind's
eye there danced a lovely vision that
lured the infatuated young man from
the right path a pair of lime eyes, a
sweet smile, a graceful girlish form, to
Raae on which the foolish fellow
Would have traveled miles 1
And she Was to he at the ball, sur
rounded by admiring swains, of one or
two of whom he was madly Jealous ';
and who knew what iriight happen
while lie was absent?
He might of course have spoken a
certain momentous little word before,
nnd lie had thought, now and then,
that it would not have fallen on re
luctant ears. But he had gone on
basking in the sunshine of her smiles,
too happy in the present to think of
the future, and he had just heard
casually that to-morrow morning early
she was to leave town for her home in
the country.
To-day, too, chance had brought a
sudden revelation to his heart. Till
then he had not been fully aware of
the strength of his own feelings for
that blue-eyed charmer. On turning
down a street corner, ho had come
suddenly face to face to her, and in
close attendance upon her wasMaddox,
of the th Lancers, a brilliant Adonis
whom ladies were terribly partial to. In
his face Harry Kendal read something
that made him tremble for his own
hopes, and showed him, too, in a start
ling moment of time, how his whole
life's happiness was bound up in them.
That rapid glance of recognition awoke
a storm of anxious fears in his breast
and left the green-eyed monster raging
there.
The bank, a great solid building of
dark gray stone, stood in an inelosure.
At the rear was a court encircled by a
fence, in which was a small wicket
gate opening into a lane a shori
distance below the main entrance, and
used cliielly for communication with
the back premises. At night it was
always kept locked. The front of the
building, on the other hand, faced one
of the principal thoroughfares, and
was approached through a massive
outer gate, which, like the smaller one,
was carefully closed after nightfall.
Captain Kendal did not change his
mind. As the evening wore on he
slipped out, merely informing the sen
tinel that he should soon return. The
old soldier, who had known and loved
his young officer for some years, shook
his head ominously as he saw him de
part, but inwardly resolved to keep his
counsel if possible.
The truant meanwhile sped on his
Willful way, nnd tumtehin all milfitn
rellections appeared in the ballroom
in time to secure the hand of his fair
charmer for several dances. Fortune
seemed disposed to smile propitiously
on him, and the coast was clear. The
colonel was not to be seen, and no one
else cared to inquire too curiously
what ollicer ought to be on guard at
the bank on that particular night. As
he led out the lady the scapegrace
lover had the satisfaction of seeing his
rival turn away with a lowering brow.
He was determined to lose no time
now. In the maze of the waltz, while
the soft undulating strains of Strauss
steeped the senses of the dancers in
sweet dreams of delight, under the
roseate light of the many wax candles
in that perfumed, crowded ballroom,
a question was asked, and an answer
tremulously whispered, which trans
ported two young people into a tempo
rary paradise of their own creating,
where there were only two, and no
room for any other besides. No won
der that at such a moment all minor
sublunary considerations were 'for
gotten. But, when a brief ecstatic hour had
passed, and they emerged once more
from the rosy pavilion whither they
had retreated among the flowers, there
loomed, dark and erect in the distant
doorway of the adjoining ballroom, a
tall, martial figure, whose gray head
towered above the company; a vision
which struck a sudden chill to the
ardent lover's heart.
" By Jove!" he exclaimed, with a
start. " There's the colonel!"
The sharp ejaculation, breaking in
strangely upon the dulcet tones of
love, as'tonished the pretty creature
who hung on his arm.
" AVhat fif the colonel ?" she asked,
softly. " Why should he not be here,
poor man?"
" Because I am here who ought to
be on guard in street, and because I
shall be cashiered to a certainty if he
sees me," was the abrupt reply.
" Oh, do go away this minute. Do,
dear Harry !" she pleaded, in terrified,
beseeching accents.
He looked at her, then around him,
irresolute for a moment. The colonel
had turned his back and was moving
into another room. N o, he could not
go just yet, the temptation to remain
was too strong.
" Leave you now, when we are
happy and are to be parted so soon ?
No, 1 cannot, darling," he whispered,
fondly. "But, never fear, we will
keep out of his way."
She did not urge him any more. She
did not fully understand the magnitude
of the offense nor the risk it involve 1,
and was too glad to keep him a little
longer by all available means.
There were a number of reception
rooms in the locale where the ball was
held, all of which were thrown open
for the occasion. Keeping a cautious
eye around them the young people
contrived to pass from one apartment
to another whenever they detected
the dreaded form of the colonel ap
proaching. After a time he settled
down quietly at a whist table in the
distance, and they gave themselves up
with reckless gayety to the enjoyment
of the evening. Another hour passed
and supper time came, and still they
danced or lingered in quiet nooks and
managed successfully to elude the eyes
whose recognition was to be so care
fully avoided.
I " What a comfort it is that he is such
a maypole and may be observed from
afar r laughed the pirlj who htid
caught the Infection of her lover's au
dacity. At length the dreaded time for part
ing was at hand. The early morning
train was to bear away the lady to her
father's summer residence, and thus to
separate for awhile the newly plighted
pair. What wonder that in those last
few precious moments they forgot all
precautions and saw and heard noth
ing in each other's all-engrossing pres
ence ? He followed her to the hall and
folded the shawl carefully round her
graceful form ; for another happy min
ute yet he stood with her hand locked
in his, meeting all her heart shining
out through her deep blue eyes. Then
the carriage door closed with a sharp
bang, which struck cold and heavy on
his ear as the rolling wheels bore her
away into the night.
Perhaps his eyes were somewhat
dazzled by the bright parting glance
he had drunk in so eagerly, for all
other things around looked dim. Pres
ently he turned listlessly to take his
hat and depart in his turn, still feel
ing like one that (breams. Suddenly,
however, something impelled him to
look up, and what was his dismay,
when ho found himself face to face
with the colonel!
There was a crowd of departing
guests in the hall, and as they gath
ered and jostled each other the two
men who had been thus unexpectedly
brought together were again borne
apart. The recognition was but in
stantaneous, therefore, and in another
moment the junior ollicer had con
trived to mingle with and disappear in
the crowd. But by the stern, aston
ished gaze which had met his eye for
that brief instant he knew that ho
had been identified, and that the
colonel fully remembered where he
ought to have been.
if he still ventured to retain any
hope that the recognition had not been
complete, such hope was promptly dis
pelled by the order which presently
rang out in ominous tones from the
colonel's well-known voice of thunder.
" Drive to the Hoyal bank instant
ly!" ho said, with awful distinctness.
"And go as fast as you can."
Captain Kendal had managed to
slip unobserved through the doorway,
and he now stood in the street.
What was to be done? The carriages
that were in waiting were all private
ones. The hackney coaches were far
down the file, and even had he been
lucky enough to secure one in time
the rattle of the wheels, at that dead
hour of the niglit, speeding m tne
same direction as the colonel's car
riage, or indeed the very fact of a ve
hicle stopping before the bank, would
have convicted him at once. There
was not a moment to be lost.
At this crisis fortunately his wits
did not forsake him. A sudden inspi
ration presented itself to his mind,
and his decision was taken in a twink
ling. Favored by opportune darkness
he crept round to the back of the
colonel's carriage, and just as it was
starting he sprang up nimbly on the
step behind. The coachman whipped
up his horses and rattled his wheels
through the still streets of the sleeping
city, clearing the distance in double
quick time, in order to forestall the re
turn of the delinquent ollicer. Neither
master nor man guessed that their hot
haste was bearing back the truant to
his post. Within the carriage the
colonel sat still and erect, as became
a worthy disciplinarian, wholly intent
on the conviction of his peccant ju
nior, in whose impending discomfort
lie could not help feeling a grim and
righteous satisfaction. At the back
the captain sat crouching on the step,
desperately concerting his measure!;.
"Impudence! stand my friend
through this scrape," he mentally ejac
ulated. "Perhaps all is not lost yet.
When the carriage turned into
street and the bank appeared in view
he jumped lightly down, and under the
friendly cover of night ran to the small
wicket gate in the lane. .Most luckily
he had taken the key with him, and
hurriedly letting himself in he passed
swiftly through the court and came up
with the sentinel inside tne great gate
while the carriage was taking the
longer curve which led up to the front.
How he blessed the chance impulse
which had induced him to take that
key 1
"The colonel's there," he said, breath
lessly. "Dont be too quick in un
doing the chain. Give me as long as
you can. And I say, Dickson," he
added anxiously, "muni's the word,
you know if you can."
"Ay! ay! sir," muttered the old sen
tinel, as he shuttled slowly along, lie
was very partial to the young man and
not so much so to the colonel.
The captain passed hurriedly within.
Just then the bell of the great gate
rang out a long, resounding peal.
The sentinel clanked the chain nois-
ily as he hooked and unhooked it,
fumbled with the key in the lock and
made such iudicious delays as enabled
the officer on guard to compose himself
in attendance at his post before the
heavy doors turned on their hinges to
admit the colonel.
"Where is Captain Kendal?" he
asked, as he alighted, in stentorian
tones which vibratedstrangely through
the silence, with a sort of angry ex
pectant note of triumph.
" On guard, sir !" answered the sol
dier, curtly.
"What?" cried the colonel, in the
shrillest of accents. He was too
utterly taken aback to say another
word. The sentinel, adopting his usual
stolid demeanor, took no notice of his
evident astonishment. Captain Kendal
heard the inquiry from within, and
came forward.
" Here, sir ; do you require me?" he
asked, coolly.
The tolonel stared at him. His
face, with its expression of mingled
sternness and entire bewilderment,
would have been no mean study for a
pillntcr. '
lie could hardly believe his eves.
Keenly scrutinizing the votiDger man,
who did not quail before his gaze, he
said stiffly, after a pause of some sec
onds :
"I certainly thought, sir, I saw yoti
at the ball in D street just now !"
" Me, sir ?" replied the other, au
daciously. "Why, I am on guard,
sir. .
" It is very singular," resumed the
colonel, without relaxing his scrutiny
and slightly raising his voice. "I
could have sworn 1 saw you there I"
" Very singular indeed, sir," retorted
the delinquent, gaining boldness from
the very extremity of the strait to
which he found himself reduced;
slnco a man can't be. in two places
at once, and you have found mo here.
A case of mistaken Identity perhaps,
sir.
The two men stood still eyeing each
other, one keenly eager to detect, the
other as equally seeking to avoid de
tection. The colonel was completely
baffled. The man was there before
him that was certain; but how, hav
ing left him, as he felt sure he had
done, among the guests at the ball, he
came to be there now was inexplica
hie. Not having vings wherewith to
Ily, how on earth hid the fellow got
there? Could he ht.ve been mistaken,
he wondered for a moment. But no,
ho knew he had not.
He shifted the form of his interro
gation:
" Then vou were not at the ball i
he asked, very pointedly.
The voting officer was worthy ot all
condemnation for having forsaken the
post of duty. But though he had acted
nexcusablv, ho was still a gentleman,
and ho would not pollute his lips with
a lie. He hesitated for a reply ; then
parried the question with another.
How could l be at the ban when
you find me here, sir?' he asked.
l es, how ; that was the mystery, the
simple solution of which was the
furthest in the world trom presenting
itself to the colonel's brain. He knew
that it was quite impossible for an
other carriage to have arrived before
his own. His coachman had driven
quickly enough to satisfy even his im
patience, and he could not have failed
to notice it another vehicle mm pre
ceded or lollowed his through tne de
serted streets. He could not in the
least understand it.
Silent, but wholly unconvinced, he
at down in the hall to think what it
might behoove him to say or do next,
ilo tlm Junior OlTlCVr ljutlol ,lotit
in a restless lashion, setting reiresii
ments before him and awkwardly en
deavoring to turn the conversation
into another channel. The colonel
answered at random, for his thoughts
were perplexing.
Mvstified, and righteously set on
convicting the offender as he doubtless
was, ho could not help, nevertheless,
feeling a perception of the comical side
of the question. He felt, too, that
however fully persuaded he might be
in his own mind of Captain Kendal's
offense, it would perhaps be a difficult
matter to prove it. At lengtli he
cleared his throat portentously and re
turned to the charge:
Look here, Captain Kendal," he
said, in accents which somehow had
taken a milder sound from the bent of
his cogitations, "it's no use beating
about the bush; I would stake my ex
istence that I saw you at the ball. But
how you come to be here now is another
matter, and I don't pretend to under
stand how you managed it. A. ou had
better make a clean breast of it, and
although it would be my duty to take
proceedings against you yet if you
will explain it is possible that I may
just for once, considering the peculiar
features of the case, lie inclined to take
a lenient view of a very grave misde
meanor, sir."
Thus encouraged, the culprit, who
detected a kindly twinkle in the
usually stern gray eye which was fixed
upon him, made a full and free con
fession of his fault and of the causes
which led thereto.
The colonel, though well advanced
in the vale of years, had not outlived
the memory of youthful hopes; and
was a kindly man, though a strict dis
ciplinarian. The young lady, whose
fair image had lured the lover from his
duty, was rather a favorite with him,
and considering, as he had said, the
peculiar features of the case, he con
sented to overlook the offense, and
inflicted no worse punishment
on the delinquent then a reprimand,
which was received in dutiful silence
and with all due contrition. Six
months later the colonel made an
eloquent speech at the wedding of two
happy young people, on which occasion
Captain JJrereton acteu as uesi man
Then two sweet blue eyes looked play
fully into lus, as the pretty bride
thanked him, in a mysterious whisper,
for the solitary and memorable occa
sion when he had consented, for once
in his life, to overlook and condone
signal breach of discipline. Temple
liar.
An Extraordinary Man.
In the person of Hoc Bey, Constan
tinople has been entertaining a most
remarkable visitor. This Circassian
chief, who has been paying homage to
his liege lord, the sultan or Turkey,
was born in 1762 and entered the
Turkish military service in 1777, since
which time eight successive sultans
have knewn him as one of the most
faithful and valiant officers in the
Ottoman army, to which he still be
longs, after an active military career of
105 years. He has fought in sixty-five
pitched battles, innumerable skir
mishes, received three and twenty
wounds, and has earned every military
decoration in the gilt of the sultan,
Now, in his one hundred and twentieth
year, he is still strong and hearty and
in full possession ot all his laculties,
Every attention was shown him that
a sovereign coma oiler a subject,
The Indians of AlaskA.
The number of aborigines In Alaska,
says a letter from that country, is V:l
riously estimated from 30000 to
50,000. With regard to those in the
jnterior there. is very .meager accurate
knowledge. The obstacles irl the way
of a thorough understanding of the
nature of this portion of the American
possessions nnd the number and char
acter of the natives, are not great,
either from the cost of 'outfitting an
exploring party, danger from the na
tives or any other terrors incident to
such an undertaking. In their handi
work, especially as exhibited by carv
ings in wood, stone and slate, their
ornaments and shapely canoes, they
display unlooked-for skill. Blank
eted natives, with painted or
hideously besmeared faces, were
to bo seen. From a condition offensive
Wi the nostrils nnd this scanty mode of
dress there are various stages of Ap
proach to cleanliness and a civilized
style of clothing ; some, indeed, make
a very presentable appearance. Some
times Indians were observed affection
ately fondling their children, and the
men often carrying their offspring in
their arms with all the apparent pride
of their white brethren. The women
generally do the trading and bargain
ing in disposing of furs and in other
transactions. AVhen an Indian offers
furs for sale, and the price has been
arranged between him and the pur
chaser, his klooehman, or squaw, can
veto the transaction, and has to be
consulted before the trade becomes
final. The Indians are never in a
hurry to conclude a bargain, those
trom a distance often remaining at a
railing post lor weeks holding out tor
most trilling suiviuice on the
price ollered. They are shrewd
traders, and the amounts agreed
upon for the different kinds of
turs seem very high to an uninitiated
on-looker. The purchasers would lose
loney on the goods if they paid coin.
he Indian s shrewdness manilests lt-
lf onlv in securing the promise of a
ligh price. They do not want money,
ut desire articles out ot the store.
heir ignorance of what these cost the
dealer leaves them a prey to the most
ulrageous imposition from the more
intelligent but less honest white traf-
cker. These Indians are industrious,
illingly embracing opportunities of
earning money by working lor it. 11
lev are not a doomed race, by reason
f liquor and contact with depraved
lutes preventing their reclamation
from heathenship, in the coming devel-
pinent of the resources ol Alaska they
in ins a ttiuniio riictor as " hewers ot
ood and drawers of water." They are
nick to learn what is required of
icm.
Ten Bushels of Swallows.
Nearlv sixty years ago," says an
gcd correspondent of an Eastern
a per, "when I was living in the town
f Litchfield, Me., the occurrence of
inch I am about to tell you took
lace. My father's house was on the
Id post road connecting the towns of
Irunswick and Augusta, and about
alf wav between those places. Early
n the autumn mv father noticed large
numbers of swallows for several davs
ving over his farm to the north. Sim-
ir Bights of the birds had in other
ears been noticed by residents
the vicinity, and comparison
testimony showed that the swal-
ows were evidently flying ti t com
mon center not far away. The flight
ad continued two or three days when
my lather and two or three or ins
neighbors determined to solve the
mystery. Starting about 5 o'clock one
afternoon, they followed the direction
taken by the "birds and came to the
dge of a grove. Here they were as
tonished to see hosts of swallows com
ing in from all directions and disap
pearing through a hole in the top of
the tall and lifeless trunk of a bass-
wood tree. The aperture where the
birds entered the tree was about thirty
feet from the ground, was six inches
or so in diameter, and was evidently
aused by the breaking off of a rotten
limb. The farmers, having noticed
that none of the birds came out, but
were constantly going In, went home
uyre puzzled than ever. A day or
wo after, when the matter had been
alked over among the farmers, several
of them returned to the tree, my
father among the number, with the in
tention of cutt ing it down. They set to
work to fell the tree. Only a tew birds
seemed to be disturbed or frightened
away by the action of tho farmers,
and the tree finally lell to the ground,
The farmers were utterly astounded to
find it nothing but a hollow shell, and
filled from bottom to top with dead
swallows. The tree was about two
and a half feet in diameter and about
thirty feet in length from the base to
the aperture where the birds had been
seen to enter, and it was estimated
that the bodies of the swallows found
in the hollow trunk would aggregate
ten bushels I They were the common
white-breasted swallow, mostly, like
those you saw at AVesterly, although,
as there, quite a number or marten
swallows were among them. Why the
birds came there is a mystery that was
never solved. That the strange affair
actually happened I am quite ready to
prove ; and though, for personal rea
sons, I prefer to withhold my name
from the public prints, I am willing
that all persons who desire a verifica
tion of the story should be reierred to
me."
In a Dakota forest last week a party
of hunters discovered a man who had
a well-developed tail nine inches in
length. They told of their discovery
when they returned to town, but failed
to state that the tail was the tail ot
squirrel. The posse of Vventy-four
young men who went out to capture
the tailed man made unpleasant re
marks when they found they were
sold.
FACTS ANU COMHEST.-.
The (esthetic movement in England
has entirely died out, and to be aesthetic
is voted to be "low" .md common.
Punch has largely assisted in killing
the craze by ridiculing it.
Asa jWdrfrt, now living in Tennes
see, is 107 years old. He fought with
Jackson at New Orleans, lie has ap
plied for a pension, but so far has
failed to procure one. He is interest
ing and magnetic in conversation,
and takes care of his great-grandchildren.
There has been another silent
couple nt Galway, N. Y., Jona
than James and his wife, who lived
together over twenty-five years without
speaking to each other. Having dis
agreed about the words of a sermon
theV heard in 1856. thev vowed eternal
silence, aild kept the vow, though
always on apparently good terms with
each other. Mr. James died hist spring,
but Mrs. James is still living.
From the statistics reported by the
United States commissioner of educa
tion for 1880, just published, it appears
mat in mil twenty-nine States re
ported a school population of 9,632,900,
while in 1880 the thirty-eight States
and eight Territories reported a total
of 15,536,280. The number enrolled
in tho public schools, twenty-eight
States only reporting -for 1871,' was
6,393,085, while for 1880 it was 9,781,
521, all the States and Territories re
porting this item.
It is estimated that there are 5,000
patent, medicines manufactured and
sold. There is one establishment that
keeps them all. They include pills
that cure every disease humanity is
heir to, bitters, cordials, elixirs, syrups,
salves, toothache drops and hair prepa
rations. There are. seventy-five medi
cinal waters, 150 liniments, 130 hair
dyes, .and of plasters, oils and other
medicaments an equal jumble. Mil
lions of dollars are yearly spent in ad
vertising them.
A German paper estimates that the
compensation which will have to be
awarded by the international commis
sion for houses destroyed by the Alex
andria bombardment at $7,700,000.
The property destroyed covers an
area of 96,000 square meters, the ave
rage value of which is estimated at,
$80 per square meter. Adding $10,
000,000 or $12,000,000 for furniture
nnd stock in trade, and $4,000,000 for
the losssol the refugees, the aggregate
sum would be $22,000,000 or $24,
000,000. The Suez canal was built with the
shares at the par value of $100. and.
although their price now is something
like $540, the company is neither re-
icing the dues nor giving greater fa
cilities for the navigation of the canal.
It is not surprising, therefore, that the
inimercial classes in England take a
eep interest in building another and
ureiy isritish canal, an undertaking
utt could be carried out. it is said.
'it li mechanical improvements and
nowledge, at a comparatively small
cost.
In the event of postal savimrs banks
in the United States where deposits as
nail as one cent may bo received, n
oou opijoruuuiv will occur to lest
le old proverb which admonishes us
take care ot the pence and let the
xmnds take care of themselves. In
England last year such small deposits
ggregated $12,50U,WU. Another in
stance of the result of this policy is
afforded by the fact that the Bank of
England has obtained $ao,300 by
reckoning in its own favor in settle
ments of transactions involving frac
tions of pennies.
Commissioner Dudley reports that
the 285,695 pensioners on the list at
the end of the last fiscal year, June 30,
1882, have been classified. There are
173,138 army and 2,361 navy invalids,
. 4 AG .. , i nro : i
u,i 10 iuuiY uu i,yoo navy widows,
minor children and dependent rela
tives; 7,134 survivors of the war of
1812, and 24,661 widows of those who
served in the war of 1812. The total
amount paid to pensioners since 1861
is $500,641,324.75. It is an astounding
act that almost one-fifth of the whole
amount expended for pensions since
the beginning of the war twenty-one
ears ago win be paid ior the same
urpose during the present year. And
there are 290,966 claims for pensions
et to tie considered.
An entire Gallo-Iioman town has
been unearthed in the neighborhood of
Poitiers. It contains a temple 114
yards in length by seventy yards in
ireadth, baths occupying live acres, a
theatre of which the stage alone
measures ninety yards on its longest
side, streets, houses and other build
ings covering a space of more than
seventeen acres. The excavations,
which are being continued, have
brought to light more edifices, sculp
ture in the very best style and in good
preservation dating, it is thought,
from the second century and a
quantity of iron, bronze and earthen
articles. M. Lisch, the inspector of
historic monuments, declares that the
town is a little Pompeii in the center
ot J; ranee.
A street railway has been laid in
Athens. But some 2,000 years too
late to find out whether or not old
Socrates, Xenophon or Demosthenes,
riding down to Pirams on a horse-car,
would have given up their seats to a
woman who wasn't pretty.
The length of tlie submarine cables
in the whole world is estimated to be
64,000 miles, and their value to be
$202,000,000. The lengtli of all the
wires in the world would reach forty
eight times around the earth.
TYeililcd-
Wow that I hold thee with a husband's right,
Tarn thy dear head, sweet wife, and lot it
rest
Within my encircling arms, which thus en
fold Of earth the purest, of thy wi the best.
Let thy smilo-winning lips all tremulous
Tress soft on mine a sonl-enthrallinff kiss;
An earnest of the happy years to ns,
Of unalloyed, yea! perfect wedded bliss. .
So let the sunlight of thy presence shino
Athwart tho future vision of my life,
Thy gentler spirit radiate through mine,
And make me worthier of thy love, sweet
wife.
JlU.ttOR OF THE DAY.
boy describing how ho had a
drawn said: "The doctor col
A
tooth
li.! me. milled like wild horses, and
just before my head came oil the tooth
dropped out."
A gentleman had his picture taken
recently ; cost him two hundred dol
lars, and still he is not happy. A
fellow took it out of the hall when the
latch wns up.
Pedestrian, who has dropped a penny
in front of "a poor, blind man:"
" WhV, tou humbug, you're not blind."
Beggar": "Not I, sir. If the card
savs I am, they must have given me
tho wrong one. I'm deaf and dumb."
A queen bee lays in the height of
the season from 2,000 to 3,000 eggs in
twenty-four hours. The man who
will discover how to graft a queen bee
on a hen will make money enough
to imy out the whole continent in six
months.
A man in Western Illinois adver
tised for a wife, his sister answered
the "ad," ana nun u.v j-nf,
thinks there is no balm in advertise
ments, while the old folks think it's
pretty hard to have two fools in the
family.
An advertisement in a Western
paper offers a "fashionable" piano for
sale. Mrs. Yeast was at a loss to
know what a fashionable piano really
was, but she has come to the conclu
sion that it must bo one that is
"banged."
"There is nothing like settling;
down," said the retired merchant,
confidentially, to his neighbor. " AVhen
I gave up business I settled down and
found I had quite a comfortable for
tune. If 1 had settled up I should not
have hail a cent."
"No Indian ever has his pony shod,"
observes an exchange, " and yet the
Indian department is charged with
$18,000 worth of horseshoes per year."
Oil, that's all right. The Indians hang
'cm over the doors of their wigwams
to bring good luck.
Not exactly quenched : "You know
I am a member of the fire department,"
said Biggs, "and if I find your young
spark in the house it will be my duty
to put him out." "But, father," re
plied his daughter, "if you do, like as
not I shall have a new flame within a
week."
Astronomical : " Mother, may I get
up at daybreak and go out to look at
the comet with. Charley?" "No, my
daughter, but you may go into the
kitchen and peel those potatoes." It
is in this way that many a youthful
and soaring mind is condemned to
limit the realm of its knowledge to
the narrow borders of our insignificant
planet.
"I don't believe in this learning
German, Spanish, French or any for
eign language," said a .Michigan man
tlie other day. " Why, I lived among
a lot of Germans and got along with
them just as well as if I had known
their language, but I didn't not a
word of it." " How did you contrive
it ?" " AVhy, you see they understood
mine."
" A New Orleans washerwoman has
in the past fifteen years raised a family
of fatherless children, given them all
good educations, purchased a hand
some house, and has $10,000 laid away
for a rainy day. Her entire possess
ions were earned at the washutb."
This item is valuable as showing how"
promptly New Orleans men pay their
wash bills.
lie was a real estate agent and com
plained that he had had three adjoin
ing houses to let since last fall, and
couldn't get rid of them on any terms.
"AVhat's the cause?" asked a friend.
"Malaria? "No." "Hum null on
tlie corner?" "No." "Neighborhood
infested with cats?" "No." "AVhat
then ?" " AVell, there's a man across
tlie way with his daughter, and he's
trying to make an American prima
donna of her."
A Fable.
One day an old Turkey took a Walk
through the Meadow to see how the
Crops were getting along. Seeing a
Hornet's Nest by a Stone AVall, she
i Fondly Imagined she could Hatch out
I the Contents. So she Sat down upon
It and did Hatch out the contents in
about two Seconds. Five Minutes
later she stood filled with Humiliation,
Running her Bill through her Feath
ers and Attempting to Count the num
ber of Perforations in her Breast,
which looked very much like a Nutmeg-Grater.
The Moral of the Fable
teaches us that Squatting on other
People's Property is a Perilous Pro
ceeding ; and that there are some
Humble Institutions which cannot be
Sat Upon. Puck.
Speaking of spiritual consolation
and the comforting assurance thatthe,
eternity of the just shall be blessed, a
Chicago clergyman tells a story. There
was an old lady in his church who was
noted for her penuriousness as well as
her piety, and while talking with her
about her hope of the hereafter he
asked: "Mrs. 8 , did you ever stop to
think what will gratify you most in
heaven?" "Oh yes," she exclaimed'
" it will be such a cheap place to live
ial"